I have talked to many people and done tons of searching to compile a list of all of the things you’ll need for college. My roommate and I have divided some stuff up, especially bathroom stuff. This is all the stuff we are taking to college!
Reblog this to help others who are struggling with their college checklist!
Bed sheets (2 sets)
Cup for toothbrushes
Shower curtain hooks
Shower curtain liner
Towel rack (over the door)
Hangers (thin hangers)
Pads/tampons (for the ladies)
Retainer (for those who’ve had braces)
Retainer case (don’t forget)
Dresses (I’m taking 3 or 4)
Pajamas (are a MUST)
Panties (15-20 pairs)
Pants (dress pants)
Purse (I’m only taking one)
Robe (a MUST)
Socks (24 pairs)
Workout clothes (in case)
Cup for pencils
(college ruled) paper
Staples & Stapler
Tape & tape dispenser
Broom & dustpan
Tiny Trash Bags
Toilet Bowl Brush
Toilet Bowl Cleaner
Flash Drive/USB/External hard drive
My roommate and I have decided we are going to purchase our own microwave, minifridge, and toaster (instead of renting them from the University).
Please feel free to alter my list for your own personal needs.
Member: Seungcheol/S.Coups (svt) Prompt/au: “Hi, new blog! Can I request for some Seungcheol fluff? Maybe in a scenario where him and the reader go from friends to lovers? You can choose what format to put it in ^ ^ thanks!!!!” Genre: Fluffity fluff fluff // college au AN: First post and I’m writing it while half asleep so it’s probably sloppy af
You knew Seungcheol initially from your job at the corner store near your dorm
The first night he came he was in a hoodie and a cap and basically just looked like,,, Boyfriend Material
And he was all smiles as he bought a two things of banana milk, three cup ramen, and a pack of those shrimp chips
You were just. floored. this man was so attractive and he was buying banana milk. Why was that so cUTE you weren’t sure but it was adorable to see him holding the tiny little bottles and looking lowkey excited to drink them
And boy oh boy did your imagination run wild after he left
You figured he was like this super cool jock who happened to have a soft spot that included banana milk
Honestly that was pretty close to being spot on lmao he was a jock who loved banana milk
But he was Not At All cool
Which you learned more about when he transferred into your dorm
He was on the other end of the hallway from you and when he saw you in the kitchen he was just !!!
You were also !!! of course
And he was like oh heyy!! Cashier person!!! All friendly and you were like oh okay that’s me
And of course he stroke up a conversation with you in which he thanked you for being so nice when ringing him up the night before and explaining that he just transferred into the dorm from his old one due to a problem roommate
It was a short conversation- before you knew it he had darted away saying he had class to attend to and that was that
You didn’t see him super often in the dorm at first,,, surprisingly you mostly saw him when you were working at the shop
He came down a few nights a week to restock on banana milk and any food he was craving and often lagged behind to talk to you
You worked the night shift most of the time so it wouldn’t interrupt your classes and you could study in between customers
And it was really slow so he didn’t feel like he was bothering you much
He was honestly a really interesting guy, and like really really cute, so you weren’t complaining much
Often times he’d wind up paying for a couple banana milks and give you one instead of saving it for later
And that’s how you guys became close friends honestly
In a poorly lit convenience store, over banana milk and occasional snacks, discussions of classes, and dumb jokes that made you both nearly snort with laughter but made any other customers look at the two of you strangely
It was a couple months of this before you began seeing each other in the dorms
He made a point to hang out in the kitchen more,,, and occasionally brought you leftovers,,, or came over asking for some tissues cause he ran out
Which then evolved into you two just hanging out in each other’s dorm rooms whenever you both had a free moment
He talked often of his guy friends, revealing that he had 12 of them but that they were a very close-knit group nonetheless
You met them all at various times as time went on,, they weren’t big on knocking and often burst into Seungcheol’s room while you guys were in the middle of watching a movie or something lmao
Half the time they wouldn’t even apologize, they’d just be like “Ooo I’ll go make popcorn and join”
Cheol: gUYs you can’t just interrupt me and (Y/N)’s time together!!!
Wonwoo: Why :) Is there something going on between you two :) Do you have something to tell us Seungcheol :)
Cheol: Nevermind you guys are always welcome
Hoshi is one of the biggest offenders tho lmao
He was honestly such an amazing and sweet friend
You had a big project due date coming up?? He was showing up with some backup supplies and a cup of coffee
You were up late studying?? He was texting you every hour to remind you that you needed sleep
You were upset?? Cheol was there to let you vent and flexing his muscles in case you wanted him to beat anyone up
When the year ends, you both agree that you would continue to stay at the dorm the next semester
And you promise to keep in touch while summer vacation is happening
But you don’t really get a chance to see each other,,,
He’s busy with his summer job and babysitting for his family members
And you have your own stuff to work on as well
And although you text and call nearly every single day, even if it’s just for a moment, you don’t get a chance to meet up
You find that there’s this sort of longing to see each other again, one that’s not really purely platonic
You’d always thought Seungcheol was attractive, and as you got to know him you found out what a hard working and caring person he was
How he seemed to look after his group of friends and eventually you,, always checking if they ate and offering to help them with anything they needed,, like he was their leader or dad or something
And how he was endlessly dorky, always ready to pull a joke out
He knew how to make you smile, even on nights where you were stressed and exhausted from the piles of work that accompanied college students
The way you fell for him seemed natural, comfortable
He was the person you felt safest around, who made your insides warm, who always had your back
And dear lord did you miss him
From what you could tell, he missed you too, and you were pretty sure it was the same way you missed him too
The way that screamed “I know we’re just friends but I don’t feel like we should be because all I want to do is hold you and tell you how wonderful you are”
That’s why you’re pretty anxious for school to start up again
You actually wind up showing up a couple days early, saying your family was going on a vacation
But really you just wanted to be in your shared dorm already cause Cheol told you he was gonna be arriving a couple days early too
It wasn’t long after you arrived and unpacked that you heard a knock at your door
And there he was, in all his glory, all eye-smiles and a dark v-neck that you very much approved of
You barely had a moment to say hello before he scooped (lol scouped,, I’m sorry) you up in his arms and hugged you tightly
You were 100% blushing and fighting back a super giddy smile as you hugged him back, arms looping around his neck
“I missed you” he informed you, not yet breaking away from the hug, and that’s when you really began to smile like an idiot
When you finally pulled back you realized something was different about him
“CheOL since when is your hair BROWN???”
He just laughed it off and held up two little bottles of
You guessed it
“I’ll tell you all about it over these”
After that, you guys began to fall into the old routine of college
But,,, you noticed your relationship was different in a way
It seemed more intimate almost
There was a lot more hugging, and the very same hugging seemed to last longer
The boys were watching movies with you guys less, and during the movies he always had one arm wrapped around you while you shared a blanket
When he visited you at the store, he often insisted on feeding you snacks, something you only embarrassedly agreed to when there was no one else there
Touches were much more often now, you holding onto his arms when you talked, or him resting his hand on your back to guide you when you walked, both of you holding onto each other when an emotional part of a show or flick came on
You had started playing with his hair when he got stressed too and vice versa
You knew that the two of you were basically dating honestly,, you hadn’t kissed or said the words out loud but there was no denying that your relationship had crossed the border from platonic to something more
You just didn’t know really how to start that conversation,,, plus what if he didn’t want to make it official yet since classes were starting to get a little more intense and being official might put the pressure on
You figured it just wouldn’t happen for a while
But he surprised you one movie night when he turned the TV off and turned to you with a serious expression
“We really need to talk about us”
Although his sudden forwardness surprised you a little, you nodded slightly
You felt your heart pick up as he grabbed your hands super delicately and squeezed them encouragingly in response
He smiled a little at the sensation and squeezed back before holding them closer to him
“I really, really like you, and I know we’re bordering on dating as it is, so I’d like to be able to finally call you mine”
And of course you agree!!! Why wouldn’t you look at this sweet boy he adores you
And he just holds you to him for a long time after that, turning the tv on to finish the movie but neither of you are paying attention ‘cause he’s running his hands through your hair gently and whispering cute and flirtatious things to make you giggle
The whole moment is just so sweet and relaxing and you feel your eyelids getting heavier before he taps you gently
And when you look up from your resting place on his collarbones he gently cups your cheeks and looks to you for permission
Of course you nod and he leans in and kisses you super gently
His lips are just as plush and kissable as you had always imagined,,, and he’s just so gentle and you can feel the love he’s pouring into the action and you do your best to mirror it
Almost too fast he’s pulling away with a little chuckle as he brushes a stray hair from your forehead
“You’re tired baby, go to sleep”
Your cheeks are heating up again at the nickname but you can’t help the gooey smile that spreads across your face as you nod
Once you’re both comfortable and snuggled up together again, you can’t help but feel like you’re gonna drown in happiness
The happy buzz stays with you as you fall asleep, perfectly warm and content in his arms and it’s just heaven
Okay but dating Seungcheol is such a dream???
Literally the mushiest and dorkiest boyfriend eVER how do you stand it???
Always coming up with new pet names for you, always texting you memes about love, always telling you new pick up lines Hoshi helped him find
Loves skinship. Lives and breathes for that shit.
He always likes to be holding or touching you in some way when you’re together, be it just your knees under the table during a class, or his hand in yours as you walk, or you resting in his lap when you’re hanging out in each other’s rooms
He’s also super thoughtful??? Like he’s a thoughtful friend but he’s somehow even more thoughtful as a boyfriend
You could mention that you tried this one type of ramen in some other city and the next time you come home from class there’s a 12 pack of it sitting on your bed
You: BABE THAT CITY IS LIKE TWO HOURS AWAY I DON’T-
Cheol: it’s worth it for you
KING OF CHEESE
Definitely bought you guys matching couple hoodies with little prints of banana milk on them
“IT’S WHAT BROUGHT US TOGETHER I HAD TO”
Stays with you when you have to work extra hours at the store
Is so sweet and polite when he goes to meet your family over the holidays
Your family coos over him and praises you for what a wonderful decision you made to make him your boyfriend
When they send you to go get groceries ofc he tags along to help you
Which leads to you sitting in the card with your legs either stuffed inside or dangling over the edge as you read off the list and he drops boxes of cereal and bags of chips on your head just to bug you
He’s giggling as you scold him because he knows you’re not serious
An elderly duo spots you two as you walk out, him carrying all the bags because he insisted that he do so
They’re both these old ladies and they just coo over how cute you two are what a gentleman he is and he’s just ^^ thank you both and you’re blushing but swelling up with pride a little bit
Basically he goes from an amazing best friend to the Perfect Boyfriend and?? Neither of you can imagine your lives without each other
Your relatives: cough cough do we hear wedding bells
You: sHUT we haven’t been dating for long eno-
Cheol: Please wait a few years and then I promise you will ^^
✨ Ingredients and Supplies
• 1 cup baking soda
• ½ cup citric acid
• ½ cup Epsom salts
• 1 tsp. water
• 2 tsp. rose essential oil
• 2 tsp. hibiscus essential oil
• 1 tsp. mint essential oil
• 3 tsp. oil (olive oil)
• Rose petals, chamomile petals, and lavender petals
• Red and purple food coloring (you can make separate batches if you want to layer your molds)
• bath bomb mold (any mold)
✨ Mix Ingredients
1. Place the dry ingredients in a bowl and then mix them all evenly with the whisk.
2. In a separate container, mix the liquid ingredients together: rose essential oil, lavender essential oil, mint essential oil, olive oil, food coloring drops
3. Slowly add the liquid mixture to the dry mix, one small spoon at a time.
4. Add in your flower petals and gently mix.
5. When well mixed, you simply pack this into a bath bomb mold and pack tightly, then let it dry.
• You can combine other ingredients with rose - it’s sort of the go-to for bath bombs and pairs well with various other flowers and fragrances.
• Remember that you’ll want to work quickly enough to avoid your mixture from drying out prior to packing in your molds.
• Every time I have used this bath bomb I have considered it an opportunity to reflect on my strengths and accomplishments; I take this time to remind myself of my beauty. Self love and appreciation are very important!
• Including candles and crystals during your bath can help boost your session. Treat yourself! Take this time to relax and slow down.
Eggs Each egg has 6 grams of protein but just 72 calories. No wonder researchers at Pennington Biomedical Research Center in Baton Rouge, Louisiana, found that eating eggs for breakfast (as part of a low-cal diet) helps you slim down.
Tomato sauce It’s loaded with lycopene, which makes your skin look younger and keeps your heart healthy. In fact, a Harvard study found that women with the most lycopene in their blood reduced their risk of a heart attack by 34%.
Dried plums (prunes) They’re packed with polyphenols, plant chemicals that have been shown to boost bone density by stimulating your bone-building cells.
Walnuts Just 14 walnut halves provide more than twice your daily dose of alpha-linolenic acid, an omega-3 fat that’s been shown to improve memory and coordination.
Brussels sprouts They have more glucosinolates (compounds that combat cancer and detoxify our bodies) than any other vegetable. For a side dish that will make you wonder why you’ve been avoiding them, slice each one into quarters, then sauté in olive oil with chopped sweet Vidalia onions.
Acai juice A glass or two of this anthocyanin-rich berry juice can dramatically boost the amount of antioxidants in your blood, say Texas A&M University researchers.
Apples They contain quercetin, an antioxidant that may reduce your risk of lung cancer.
Bok choy This calcium-rich veggie can protect your bones and may even ward off PMS symptoms.
Steel-cut oats Because they’re less processed than traditional oats, they’re digested more slowly—keeping you full all morning long.
Salmon You’ll get all the heart-smart omega-3s you need in a day from just 3 oz.
Avocados Their healthy fat keeps you satisfied and helps you absorb other nutrients. For a new twist, brush a halved avocado (pit removed) with olive oil and grill 1 minute. Serve with red onion, sliced grapefruit and balsamic vinegar.
Spinach A half-cup provides more than five times your daily dose of vitamin K, which helps blood clot and builds strong bones.
Canned pumpkin It’s filled with natural cancer fighters alpha- and beta-carotene.
Cauliflower White foods can be good for you! This one is packed with cancer-fighting glucosinolates.
Scallops A 3-oz serving has 14 grams of protein but just 75 calories.
Collard greens They’re exploding with nutrients like vitamin A, zeaxanthin and lutein, which keep your eyes healthy.
Olives They deliver the same heart-healthy monounsaturated fat you get in olive oil, but for just 7 calories per jumbo olive!
Brown rice It’s a top source of magnesium, a mineral your body uses for more than 300 chemical reactions (such as building bones and converting food to energy).
Oysters These keep your immune system strong. A 3-oz serving (about 6 oysters) dishes up a quarter of your daily iron, plus nearly twice the zinc and all the selenium you need in a day.
Edamame One cup has a whopping 22 grams of plant protein, as well as lots of fiber, folate and cholesterol-lowering phytosterols.
Strawberries They’re loaded with ellagitannins, phytochemicals that may halt the growth of cervical and colon cancers.
Lentils A great source of meat-free protein, a half-cup of cooked lentils also gives you nearly half your daily folate, a B vitamin that protects a woman’s unborn baby from neural tube defects.
Bran flakes Their whole grains keep your heart in tip-top shape by reducing inflammation and melting away belly fat.
Kiwifruit (kiwi) Italian researchers found that it reduces asthma-related wheezing, thanks to its high vitamin C content (one kiwi has 110% of your daily requirement).
Black beans They’re loaded with protein, fiber, and flavonoids—antioxidants that help your arteries stay relaxed and pliable.
Sunflower seeds A quarter-cup delivers half your day’s vitamin E, which keeps your heart healthy and fights infection.
Sardines 3 oz provide more than 100% of your daily vitamin D. Sardines are also a top source of omega-3 fats. Try adding mashed canned sardines to marinara sauce and serving over whole-wheat pasta.
Asparagus A half-cup supplies 50% of your daily bone-building vitamin K and a third of your day’s folate, it’s a natural diuretic so it banishes bloating, too.
Bananas They’re loaded with several kinds of good-for-you fiber, including resistant starch (which helps you slim down).
Broccoli sprouts They have 10 times more of the cancer-preventing compound glucoraphanin than regular broccoli.
Fat-free milk With a third of the calcium and half the vitamin D you need in a day, plus 8 grams u of muscle-building protein, it’s the ultimate energy drink.
Baked potatoes Each one packs a megadose of blood-pressure–lowering potassium—even more than a banana.
Sweet potatoes Half of a large baked sweet potato delivers more than 450% of your daily dose of vitamin A, which protects your vision and your immune system.
Flaxseed Not only is flaxseed loaded with plant omega-3s, it also has more lignans (compounds that may prevent endometrial and ovarian cancer) than any other food. Store ground flaxseed in your refrigerator and sprinkle on yogurt, cold cereal or oatmeal.
Greek yogurt It has twice the protein of regular yogurt.
Dried tart cherries Researchers at Michigan State University found their potent anthocyanins help control blood sugar, reduce insulin and lower cholesterol.
Wheat germ A quarter-cup gives you more than 40% of your daily vitamin E and immune-boosting selenium.
Whole-wheat english muffins You get 4 ½ grams of fiber for only 134 calories.
Tea, green and black tea prevent hardening of the arteries, according to researchers at the University of Scranton.
Peanut butter This smart spread has arginine, an amino acid that helps keep blood vessels healthy.
Blackberries The king of the berry family boasts more antioxidants than strawberries, cranberries or blueberries.
Mustard greens These “greens” (actually a cruciferous veggie) are a top source of vitamin K. For a tasty pesto, chop them in a food processor with garlic, walnuts, Parmesan and olive oil.
Grapes They’re a leading source of resveratrol, the plant chemical responsible for the heart-healthy benefits of red wine.
Soy milk A good source of vegetable protein, calcium-enriched soy milk has as much calcium and vitamin D as cow’s milk.
Brazil nuts They have more selenium than any other food. One nut delivers your entire day’s worth!
Canola oil A Tbsp of this heart-healthy oil has all the alpha-linolenic acid you need in a day, plus two different forms of vitamin E.
Blueberries They improve memory by protecting your brain from inflammation and boosting communication between brain cells.
Oranges One orange supplies more than 100% of the vitamin C you need in a day. It’s also a good source of calcium and folate.
Watercress With just 4 calories per cup, this cruciferous veggie delivers a hefty dose of vitamin K, zeaxanthin, lutein, beta-carotene and cancer-fighting phytochemicals.
Turkey breast It has 20 grams of satisfying protein but just 90 calories per 3-oz serving.
Barley A top source of beta-glucan, a fiber that lowers cholesterol and helps control blood sugar.
Shiitake mushrooms One serving (about ¼ lb) provides as much vitamin D as you’d get from a glass of milk.
The woman slept for the rest of the day and through the night. Steve wanted to stay close in case she woke up suddenly but Bruce said it would be a while. She was completely exhausted from whatever ordeal she had gone through. Still, Steve was hesitant to leave and ended up bringing a laptop and his files into her room and started working on his mission reports while she slept. He caught a couple hours of sleep in the chair but mostly just watched over her, thankful for super solider cells that don’t need the regeneration sleep provides on a regular basis.
The next morning, he was sipping a cup of coffee that Nat had brought him, when her eyes fluttered open. She turned and stared at him, not showing as much fear as before, but still had a wariness in her eyes.
There’s a keurig (donated by a muggleborn, of course) in the common room with a magically self-replenishing supply of every k-cup flavor you can imagine because caffeine makes up 85% of a Ravenclaw’s blood
Muggleborns in other houses referring to their Ravenclaw friend as the spock of the friend group
Every Saturday night someone offers up their netflix and a random documentary/science special/history special gets projected on a sheet hung up on the wall of the common room
There’s a bulletin board with reminders to drink water, take stretch breaks, and eat at regular intervals
Ravenclaws using pens because fuck continuously dipping my quill i need to get these thoughts onto paper immediately and i don’t have time for that bullshit
Ravenclaws who run studyblrs
Ravenclaws organising study groups and group chats for homework help
Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs teaching Slytherins and Gryffindors about self care because some of them perceive struggling with depression/anxiety/mental illness as being weak but those Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws will have none of it and want their friends to be their happiest, healthiest, and best selves
new paintings/sculptures/art by Ravenclaws being featured throughout the common room every month so everyone can see how creative and wonderful their housemates are
Ravenclaws getting really existential/philosophical and their friends from other houses just going “what the fuck man i just wanna play exploding snap with you and now i feel like a speck of dust floating in the void”
Ravenclaws getting really heated when someone says they don’t believe in climate change/evolution or that they’re not a feminist or that they think reverse racism is real and their friends have to drag them back while they’re hissing, “ hhhhHHHH i haVE A FUCKING POWER POINT FOR THIS LET ME EDUCATE THIS THICK MOTHERFUCKER”
Ravenclaws who experience some kind of privilege their friend does not and absolutely SEETHING when they’re out with their best mate and someone says/does something discriminatory against said perfect angel best friend who is way cooler than your racist/homophobic/sexist/ableist/bigoted ass.
“what do you mean not every episode of bill nye the science guy is on netflix?????”
Ravenclaws who r total sluts for art
Ravenclaws who r total sluts for history
Ravenclaws who r total sluts for art history
Ravenclaws who are literally always ready to fight someone 25/8 but don’t actually because literally when has violence ever resulted in a positive outcome for all parties involved?? that’s right Patricia, never.
Ravenclaws going on day trips/adventures with their friends and planning out an itinerary because there’s so much to see and yes we do need to visit this obscure museum of bricks because it seems fascinating okay
Ravenclaws watching modern TV shows/movies about witches/wizards/magical beings and compiling a list of every factual inaccuracy they come across, complete with time stamps, external sources, and citations
instead of doing their fucking homework like they know they fucking should be
Ravenclaws being open to learning about new friends they make who have different political/socio-economical/religious/cultural backgrounds than them because it’s fascinating and they want to make sure they’re as aware and accepting of the diversity in the world as possible
as always, feel free to reblog and add your own! I hope you all enjoy!
Laying sprawled out on the bathroom floor, covered in your own blood, vomit, and sweat, honestly wasn’t as bad as you thought it would be. Actually, it was probably a million times worse, but the shock had set in such a long time ago that you were numb to everything right now, especially after Josh had proceeded to yell at you and drop you back on the tile. So here you were, bleeding to death and scrambling down the hallway back to the nightstand where you hoped and prayed your phone would still be waiting for you. It felt like your entire core was set on fire, your stomach crushed, and there was the most miserable migraine still ringing in your head. You wouldn’t think it would be this bad of a miscarriage in the first trimester, but then you thought about all the weed and alcohol, and you couldn’t help but own up to the fact that it was all your fault. You brought this upon yourself.
Relief surged through you as soon as you reached your phone, snatching it off the bed stand, your hand uncontrollably shaking. You fumbled to unlock it, and then scroll through your contacts, trying to think straight. Would Jenna help you? Over Tyler’s dead body. You didn’t want to bother Brendon, but he seemed like your last chance. Josh had just abandoned you there, leaving you to die, not giving a shit whether or not you’d be okay. Thinking over it, you shouldn’t really be one to blame him. He had every right to be as angry as he was. You grit your teeth, trying to hold back the unbearable pain, and then called Brendon. It took several rings before you heard him pick up. “You okay?” he answered groggily, probably just as hungover as you were. “It’s the middle of the night.”
“I’m,” you took a deep breath and tried to recover, barely choking out each word. “On. Floor. Bedroom.”
“Hey,” his voice softened. “You don’t sound too good. You alright?”
“Dying,” you sputtered out. “Fuck. Bleeding.”
“Oh god. Bleeding? Dying? I’ll be right there,” he hurriedly replied. “Shit, I’m on my way.” He hung up the call, leaving you groaning on the ground, wishing more than anything you could just die already.
When Brendon finally came barging into your house, which partially concerned you because Josh hadn’t locked the door but you were also thankful for so you didn’t have to move much anymore, a rush of relief washed over you. “I’m in here!” you had to call out, and you heard the familiar footsteps, moment of silence in order to let the shock set in, and then the cussing.
“What the fuck,” you heard him breathe out. He followed the trail of blood from the bathroom out to the hallway and to the bedroom, then walked through the door, gaping at you. “Oh. My. God.”
“Stop staring and help me already,” you grumbled. “I’m sick of conversation.”
“Yeah, I’m on it,” he nodded quickly. “What do you need? Hospital?”
“No,” you immediately shook your head. “Just meds. Lots of pain killers. They should be in the cabinet. And uh, I don’t know. Maybe a bath. New clothes.”
“Don’t worry,” he reassured. “I’ll take care of you.”
And as always, he did. Brendon had no hesitation in getting you what you needed. He supplied you with a cup of water and several extra strength Tylenol, as well as some left over pasta he found in the fridge because he insisted you needed to eat something while you hydrated. He then managed to clean up the mess in the bathroom and a bit on the carpeting and bedroom floor, running the tub full of warm water and then carrying you there and slowly undressing you, constantly asking you if you were alright or felt better. It was humbling for you to be taken care of like a small child, being fed and washed and dressed helplessly, but for some reason, with Brendon, it felt comforting. Normally when you were sick and Josh had to take care of you, you felt embarrassed or as if a burden to him, but with Brendon, it was charitable and loving. It reminded you of the morning you first remembered Brendon.
It felt like just yesterday. Waking up with another miserable hangover, being fed and taken care of, given meds, then washed, treated with love through and through. That was the first memory you could recall with Brendon, when you woke up and first locked eyes with him, wanting so desperately to know who he was. Now here you were, a million mistakes, a miscarriage, and a now angry boyfriend later, wound up in the same situation, Brendon shoving away everything in his life to put you first and make sure you were okay. It seemed like he was always there for you, a shoulder to lean on when you needed it most, a number to call when you were lonely, a drug to cure all your problems.
“Thank you,” you whispered.
“Hmm?” Brendon raised an eyebrow. He had carried you to your room, with you now dressed in a large shirt and some underwear, cuddling you and wrapping you in a blanket on your bed.
“I just wanted to thank you,” you shrugged, raising your head from leaning on him and looking him in the eyes. “For everything you’ve done for me.”
“There’s no need to do that,” he reassured. He brushed your hair out of your face and tucked it behind your ear, giving a soft smile. “I do all of this because I love you.”
A pang of guilt rested in your stomach. “What about Sarah?” you barely whispered. “What are you going to do about her?”
“Look,” he faltered, feeling uneasy. “That’s different. Alright?”
“I’m sure,” you mumbled, resting your head on his chest and thinking over it all. The silence in the room was unbearable, the ringing in your ears making you want to scream, Brendon refusing to say anything in response. You were truly alone now. Sure, Brendon was here at the moment, but as soon as Sarah would get off vacation, he would go running back to her. Tyler already hated your guts, and probably wouldn’t let Jenna get anywhere near you after he had found out your true intentions. And Josh. He loathed you completely. You still remembered him standing in the doorway of the bathroom, telling you how he wanted to marry you, how you had ruined everything, how he couldn’t believe you would do something like this.
There was a knock on the door and you jolted upright, Brendon just as startled as you were. “Who might that be?” he asked cautiously.
“It might be Tyler,” you sighed. “Coming to kick my sorry little ass.”
“Don’t say that,” Brendon narrowed his eyes. “Hey, you stay here. Alright? Take it easy. No stress. I’ll see whoever’s at the door.”
“Brendon,” you swallowed uncomfortably. “That might not be such a good idea.”
“It will be fine,” he insisted. “You stay here. Try to get some sleep.”
As wary as you were about everything being just fine, it wasn’t like you had the energy to fight Brendon anyways. You still felt miserable despite the medication, and you took a deep breath, reaching over for a joint and the lighter on the nightstand, picking it up between your fingers and lighting it with the flickering flame. It hadn’t occurred to you before that Josh might be kicking you out of the apartment. Where the hell would you live? It wasn’t like you could just go to Brendon’s house, seeing as Sarah wouldn’t be on vacation for forever. A sick feeling settled in your stomach and you wished more than anything that you could just disappear. You took a long drag of your joint and let the billows of smoke disperse throughout the room, hoping that things would clear up soon.
Your mind started to linger on other things. Like where Josh might be right now. He could’ve driven over to Tyler’s house and spilled out the entire story to him. That’s what sounded most likely. But he also could’ve done something dangerous. Ideas of your dream lingered in your mind and left a stale taste in your mouth. He wouldn’t kill himself, would he? Visions of his tear stained face and broken eyes burned in the back of your mind and made you feel terribly guilt ridden. You hoped he was okay. You still loved him after all. That’s when you heard the escalation of voices and you began to get concerned.
“You think you can just fucking kill my kid, huh?” a loud voice shouted. Josh. It was Josh.
“Your kid,” Brendon scoffed. “Right.”
“I’m going to kick your ass,” Josh threatened. “I can’t believe you’d do that. I thought we were friends.”
“Hey, I didn’t know,” Brendon defended. “She never told me.”
“She never told you she had a boyfriend?” Josh’s voice escalated. He must’ve been furious beyond belief. “Of course she didn’t! She just thinks she can walk all over me.”
“Maybe if you actually treated her right then she wouldn’t have to come begging to me!” Brendon taunted.
“Treat her right?” you could practically envision the boiling anger rising up inside of Josh. “I did everything for her! I bought her everything she could ever want! I treated her like a queen! Then I leave for tour and she thinks she can throw that all away? That’s my fault?”
“You treat her like she’s a child,” Brendon argued. “You don’t let her drink or do drugs or even have rough sex. How do you expect her to follow your stupid rules? You need to let her breathe, let her live a little.”
“Oh, I’m sorry I’m not going to let her snort cocaine and get shit face wasted every night!” Josh apologized, sarcasm oozing with every word. “I’m sorry I won’t let her hoe around at the clubs in LA!”
“That’s not what I meant, Josh,” Brendon sighed.
“I’m sorry I’m not a fuck boy with a one man band who can charm her with a wink and a smile and whisk her away for months on end!” Josh seethed. “I’m sorry I don’t have weed growing out of my pockets and whiskey on hand and the audacity to let my bad habits influence the others around me!”
“Hey! That’s it!” Brendon snapped. “There’s nothing you can do, Josh! Whining about me being better than you isn’t going to fix the problem! She’s always going to want me more!”
“Bullshit,” Josh spat. “How come she never had the guts to break up with me then? She could’ve just ran off with you and left me out of this. But she didn’t. You know why? Because she found out you’re a cheater. You have so many other girls you’re not willing to give up for her, she’s afraid you’re going to leave her hanging.”
“I’m the one leaving her hanging?” Brendon questioned. “Last I checked, she was the one refusing to break up with her boyfriend and denying to have sex with me because she thought it was wrong! And then she comes crawling back to me with apologies and begging for me to take her back again. Yeah. Totally on me.”
“Fuck you,” Josh replied. “You’re a dick.”
“Of course I am,” Brendon chuckled. “A dick a whole lot better than yours.”
That was it. You couldn’t take it anymore. You couldn’t just sit in the back bedroom and listen to the boys tear each other apart. It was unbearable. You put out your joint and groaned as you pushed yourself off the mattress and stumbled out of the bedroom, looking for the boys. They didn’t seem to be arguing anymore. You didn’t hear their voices. You looked in the living room, seeing nothing, but then starting to hear a wheezing, choking sound. Fear seized your entire being as you heard someone start grumbling, as if whispering, and you turned the corner, speechless and shocked with what you found. Josh had Brendon in a headlock, choking him half to death, Brendon’s face turning a pale shade of blue. Your jaw dropped, staring at the scene, Brendon desperately grabbing at Josh’s arm, only making him squeeze harder.
“You think you can fuck my girlfriend and I won’t know about it, huh?” Josh muttered in his ear. “Knock her up and get me to believe it’s my kid? Let her choke on marijuana smoke and get drunk on fancy bottles of liquor? Ruin my entire relationship with her just so you can add another girl’s name on your long list of sluts?”
“Stop,” you choked out, terrified. “Please Josh.”
“What?” his eyes blazed with fury, his gaze turning towards you. “Do you want a piece of this as well?”
“No,” you carefully shook your head, glancing at Brendon whose eyes were watering, him gasping for breath, scratching Josh’s arm so hard it bled.
“Don’t think I won’t,” Josh warned.
“You don’t have to do this,” you insisted softly, voice shaking, mind spinning. “You don’t need to hurt anyone Josh.”
“Yes I do,” he insisted, glaring at you. “He hurt you.”
“What? No, Josh. This isn’t his fault-” you tried to explain but he only threw Brendon to the ground, which you were extremely grateful for, but also horrified to find out what he might have in store for you. You took a step back and watched as Josh’s chest heaved up and down with heavy breaths, him turning towards you, those angry eyes still afire. Brendon was on the ground, choking for air, trying to get ahold of his surroundings. “Please. Just take a deep breath. Calm down.”
“Calm down?” he yelled. “How the fuck do you expect me to calm down when I wake up in the middle of the night and find my girlfriend bleeding to death on the bathroom floor with a dead baby? When I finally find out the guy who stole you away from me, fucked you up with drugs and sex and alcohol and a baby, and then dumped you? You think I’m going to be calm, babe?”
“N-no,” you stuttered out, glancing at Brendon still laying on the floor and hacking up a lung.
“That’s right!” he shouted. “So stay the fuck out of my way, and let me take care of this for good!”
“Josh,” your voice broke as you saw him turn back around towards Brendon, tugging him up off the floor by his shirt collar, and then shoving him up against the wall. You had never seen Josh do anything like this. He had never gotten this angry in all his life as far as you knew. You were terrified.
“Now as for you,” Josh chuckled darkly, tightening his grip on Brendon’s shirt, pushing him back harder. “I don’t believe we’re done quite yet.”