the songs are supposed to be listened to in this specific order


It’s been 10 years since we first started taking the Hobbits to Isengard. I mean, it’s been way longer - the Hobbits could have fucking walked there, back again, managed to get served several times at the downstairs bar in Doggett’s and got a Southeastern train service all the way to Charing Cross since Tolkien put pen to page. But (and believe me, this is deeply unusual for me) let’s put J R R aside in this.

Peter Jackson’s Lord of the Rings trilogy is kind of… well, both too faithful (total lack of critical interrogation of Tolkien’s absolutely awful concepts around race, gender, etc.) and not faithful enough in that it appeared to miss all the points your correspondent’s teenage self managed to find in the series. Specifically, where Lord of the Rings is an obsessively detailed but ultimately quite modest and traumatised epic, a huge amount of which is two small, starving creatures crawling around in mud having moral dilemmas. The Jackson films take themselves as seriously and grandly as the books came to be and as I suspect their author probably never did.

Taking the Hobbits to Isengard, on the other hand, is a pure and perfect work and I will hear no ill spoken of it else ye never receive a pint in a round bought by me again. 

It takes as its base the Hovis-theme-ripping-off music from The Shire - the small-worlded part of the films, before any grandeur is truly injected into the bloated beastie that is the trilogy. The Hobbiton theme is supposed to be homely, reassuring, quaint - like anything that succeeds at that, it sounds fucking amazing played on an airhorn.

The simplicity of the Shire’s theme is what allows it to so naturally accept the kitchen-sink style auditory ornamentation that is ‘a donk’. A classic staple of rave, it needs no introduction even in a world as apparently dislocated from two WKDs and a honk on some poppers as the miruvor-quaffing pipeweed fiends we see here.

As a lyrical piece, Taking The Hobbits is discursive - like many of the very best pieces of pop. One only has to consider the sweet, sweet tension of Fleetwood Mac’s The Chain or Brandy and Monica’s iconic The Boy Is Mine to recognise that dialogous pop is, when it works, a particularly sublime genre.

It doesn’t matter that the lines are, ostensibly, orphaned from their original place in the script - from the eponymous ejaculation to Gollum’s hissed What did u say??? they’re all perfectly addressing each other in the sort of gloriously confused cacophony usually reserved for a misunderstanding-based brawl outside a kebab shop at 3am. 

I remember the first time I heard Taking The Hobbits To Isengard. It was quite a momentous occasion because I still had dial up, so it took roughly the length of a decent pop song to load and it was very difficult to tell if it was deliberate or a bandwidth-related glitch remix for at least 30 torturously disrupted seconds. I’d imagined it would be a fairly quick joke - most internet video based things were, at the time, but no; a fully fledged song. That just kept going. 

The initial air horns! These are funny, yes because we remember them as the Shire theme, which isn’t even the music for this bit. The stuttering sample of the original line! Which sustains itself as Sheffield Dave-style shout out far better than it should, given it’s old seriousface Elf ears himself yelling off a horse. 

(In retrospect, should have equated that with Sheffield Dave earlier)

Then there’s …polka bit. Few pop songs manage to maintain a polka interlude - Bohemian Rhapsody springs to mind but Taking the Hobbits To Isengard manages to repeatedly insert it without losing coherency around its original rave premise. If you don’t think ‘Tell me where is Gandalf, for I much desire to speak with him’ delivered over a little eurodance handbag bit is not both extremely funny and excellent pop, I can’t help you. 

Taking The Hobbits To Isengard would score reasonably at Eurovision. Not because Eurovision is actually the home of comedy trash but because if France (and it would probably have to be France in order for the Elven analogues to take themselves seriously enough) scooted in on an artpop platform and wanged loads of fucking airhorns round the stadium it would be entirely in keeping with European sensibilities of solemnly considering the totally whimsical due to our inherent reservedness about experiencing joy.

(The slightly older and wiser part of me has to question the repeated use of Gollum’s ‘stupid, fat, Hobbits’ which makes sense in the context of what he is but isn’t inherently funny, unlike a context-dislocated, bass-intoned ‘A Balrog of Morgoth’)

The great thing about Taking The Hobbits To Isengard is it actually gets funnier the more it goes on. Like Star Trekkin it not only sets out to commit to a fairly one-note premise but to hammer that note until it falls out through the piano and becomes a transcendent free agent, cascading through the strings. 

It takes a premise; that the Lord of the Rings films, in their overblown format, are very, very silly and runs with it extremely, deadly seriously. This is the core of not all but a fairly substantial chunk of really good pop, as well as an excellent manual for life. All things are here - a manic sense of imminent implosion, troubling past associated with racist ideologies, handcarts, hell, what did u say???

Very seriously; Taking The Hobbits To Isengard is a superb piece of fan work and it has substantially enriched my life to listen to it on loop for the past 45 minutes whilst watching a parliamentary debate on mute. Creators of this piece: thank.

Top 6 Apps for Learning Mandarin Chinese

Last summer, while I was supposed to be studying French intensively, I accidentally started studying Mandarin instead. These things happen! The best thing about Mandarin compared to some other languages I’ve studied (specifically Persian and Korean) is that there are a huge number of resources available to help learners, including a lot of very well-designed apps. After months of obsessively checking the iTunes store for the best apps and trying them out, these are my favorite six (plus a few more worth mentioning). They appear in ascending order from my least favorite to my most favorite.

Worth mentioning: A couple of apps not included on this list but worth mentioning are Pleco and Skritter. 

Pleco is a highly-regarded Chinese dictionary. I have it on my phone and do use it, but I left it off the list because I prefer another (#6 on this list). Since I’m still very much a beginner, a thorough dictionary isn’t quite so important to me right now. However, it seems like every advanced student of Mandarin recommends this app, so I had to include it.

Skritter is another app that’s highly regarded among serious students. I believe it focuses on helping with character recognition and writing. It has a subscription service that is a bit expensive, which is why I’ve never tried it; however, everyone seems to rave about it. If you’re a serious student, you should definitely look into it.

Also, I recommend downloading some Chinese-language apps designed for preschoolers. I found several of them online in the iTunes store, and a lot of them include short stories with simple words, practice with basic characters, etc. Using these apps gives you some immersive listening practice, which is fun. They can be kind of hit and miss, so I recommend downloading all you can find and seeing what you can figure out and what you like. They won’t replace any of the apps below, but they still serve a purpose.

6. WCC Dictionary This is the dictionary I use instead of Pleco. I like it primarily because of its beautiful design (something Pleco doesn’t really have). This app is mainly a dictionary, but it offers a lot more than that. For example, it has a character scanner (so you can look up words you find in books by taking a picture of the character). It also has a “story library” with a few simple books to read (with Pinyin, the characters, an English translation, and the ability to listen to the story being read). Characters are color coded if you use that as a device to help you with tones. It has a flashcard program with pre-created word lists, extensive example sentences, a section on radicals with example words, and stroke order animations. It also offers a “character of the day” and daily “homework” to motivate you to use what you learn. The dictionary itself is free, but there’s a lot of content that you have to pay to unlock, although there’s also a way to buy the content using “coins” that you earn through using the app.

5. Mindsnacks Mandarin A lot of you are already familiar with the Mindsnacks app because it’s offered for a lot of different languages (and a few school subjects like geography). This app uses games to teach Mandarin, mostly focusing on vocabulary (not grammar or sentence construction). It’s a bit limited, but it can be a really fun way to learn. After a while, the games start to feel repetitive and can get boring, but the app also has you move through levels (which allow you to unlock new games) and uses other incentives to keep you playing. The audio is an actual human, too, which is a big benefit since many apps and programs rely on Google Translate robot voices. This is a paid app, which could be a drawback.

4. FluentU This app is the reason I started learning Mandarin in the first place. I tried using it for French, but I felt like my French was too advanced to gain much from it. Even though there were advanced-level videos with vocabulary I didn’t know, FluentU doesn’t do a good job of adapting to your level and guessing which words will give you trouble. That’s perfectly fine for a beginner, though, since every word will probably give you trouble, which is why I used it for Mandarin. I think the makers of FluentU are Chinese speakers, and they seem to have focused more on Mandarin in their app. They have a built-in course you can follow, using videos they made themselves for teaching the language. The videos are pretty good, and you will feel like you’re learning a lot. There are also a lot of other videos if you want to branch out, including some catchy songs and clips from commercials or TV shows. The built-in flashcard system is a good way to review, but there’s no way to adjust their algorithms, so you might end up reviewing the same words way too often. I stopped using the program when I had 400+ words to review every day, and I just couldn’t keep up and continue advancing. This app is also very limited in the free version, and the paid subscription is VERY pricey, in my opinion, especially considering that there are other apps out there that offer more features. All of the videos are on YouTube anyway, so you can still use them to learn as you advance (or if you have a friend who can help you). I recommend this app if you want to pay for one month and use it to study intensively and advance quickly. That’s what I did, and I think it helped me out a lot.

3. ChineseSkill This is the first app that was designed to be a “Duolingo for Mandarin,” and it has a lot of great features. There’s the typical “tree” like in Duolingo, where you advance through different lessons one by one. It teaches character recognition, pronunciation, and grammar. The lessons can be really challenging for a beginner (sometimes too challenging, I thought), but it covers a lot of material. I’m not completely happy with the order in which lessons are taught (for example, there’s a lesson on shapes near the beginning that has you learn words like “triangle,” which seemed unimportant to me). The other drawback is there isn’t an easy way to review what you’ve learned (like on Duolingo when your gold-level lessons start to fade). It’s possible, but not super easy to access. Other interesting features include a tone game, a pinyin chart, a “survival kit” that’s like a travel phrasebook, and practice with stroke order. Also, this app is 100% free, which is amazing! I definitely recommend this app.

2. Social Language This app is really different from the others and is probably the most useful if you believe in speaking a language as soon as possible. I don’t think a lot of English speakers know about it because it seems to be marketed mostly to Chinese speakers. It’s a bit hard to explain, but I’ll try my best: basically, there’s a tree like you have for Duolingo, but the exercises are all to improve your speaking and pronunciation. You work through the lessons, and Chinese-speaking users rate and comment on your recordings. They can even leave voice messages to help you improve. You can do the same for them (in fact, you have to if you want to unlock higher levels). That alone makes the app worth downloading, but even better is that it includes a CHAT FEATURE that makes it very easy to interact with native speakers. You can see the profiles of hundreds of Chinese speakers who are online at any given time of day, and you can send a text or voice message to them and later add them to your friends’ list. What’s more,the ratio of Chinese to English speakers heavily favors English speakers. You will find hundreds of Chinese speakers eager to practice their English, and often you will be one of only a handful of English speakers on the app, meaning you have instant access to a chat partner any time of day or night. Have a question about your homework, something you read, or a phrase you don’t know how to pronounce? Instant, free tutoring is available 24/7 on this app, which is also FREE! I met some really nice people here without the pressure of a more formal language exchange. You can have a casual conversation any time you want, and it’s like text messaging so there’s less pressure if you’re shy about speaking Chinese. The only drawback is the same as with all language exchanges, which is that it’s sometimes difficult to balance the two languages. Also, I had problems with sending voice messages in chat, which can be frustrating. Overall, though, I’d say Social Language is a must-have.

1. HelloChinese This app didn’t exist last summer when I was looking for a Mandarin version of Duolingo, but I discovered it last week and fell in love with it. It actually has fewer features than ChineseSkill, but the pacing seems much better, and it focuses more heavily on pronunciation (though the speech recognition software isn’t perfect and you will sometimes need to skip a speaking question just to keep moving forward). It comes with some good grammar explanations and a really basic flashcard program for review. Honestly, I feel bad for rating it higher than ChineseSkill since ChineseSkill has been around longer and offers a lot more features, but I feel like HelloChinese just makes more sense and is easier to stick with than ChineseSkill. Like ChineseSkill, it’s also 100% free! I consider HelloChinese to be my “core” app for casual study, with the other apps acting as supplements. If you’re a more serious student, HelloChinese might not be your #1 pick, but it’s great for beginners who like the structure of an app like DuoLingo.

amnesia || sebastian stan

word count: 2109

summary: sebastian stan x reader → he’s waiting for you to remember

author’s note: i took a chance on this one. it’s been in my drafts for awhile now and i’m just now posting it. it might be a little out of character, since i didn’t originally have anyone planned out for this. (sorry for any spelling or grammar errors) enjoy :)

Keep reading

Nobody puts Bill in a corner, Bill Denbrough.

A/N: not really surprising that I made a small lil something for him cause tbh my heart belongs to Bill Denbrough but, I always had a HC that he loves the movie Dirty Dancing and I was listening to the soundtrack the other day and thought of this! 100% fluff and just Richie being Richie.

Word Count: 2,270 (short, I know)

Bill invites her to hang out with him at the quarry as many times as he can manage. He asked her out a month ago and still hasn’t found a way to tell the Losers. Every time he tries, the words just won’t come out.

So their “dates” are secret. It’s not that they don’t trust them, they’re just afraid of what it’ll do to their group of friends. What would happen to their dynamic if two of them were dating or holding hand in front of everyone? As stupid as it may sound from a different perspective, it’s a difficult problem for them.

The only person, unbeknownst to him, who knows where they sneak off to is Stan. Because Y/N and him are close friends and he knew something was up.

A boombox sits on a rock next to where Bill and Y/N are sitting, talking, and cuddling into each other.

She stands up and walks up to his backpack, rifling through the main pouch to look through the tapes he brought. Bill’s music taste is a variety of good artists and a few random songs here or there.

Y/N thumbs through the selection and mumbles to herself, “Echo and the Bunnymen, Joy Division, Toto, New Order, D-”

Her soft words halt at the sight of one specific tape that she didn’t know he had. And to be fair, it’s one he didn’t even mean to bring out of embarrassment. You could call it a guilty pleasure.

Bill loves the movie Dirty Dancing and has the entire soundtrack on one of his tapes. A main reason he hides it is because it would provide Richie with way too much joke material and the idea of giving his friend that much satisfaction makes him cringe. The other reason is that because it’s more of a “girly” or “chick flick” movie after all, and he’s afraid she’ll think it’s weird.

“I didn’t know you liked Dirty Dancing,” Y/N says and delicately turns over the tape in her hands.

The words make his head snap up to focus on her. An intense blush spreads over his entire face, even some redness reaching the tips of his ears upon seeing his girlfriend find his secret tape.

“W-Where did you-that isn’t supposed to be in there,” Bill says.

He’s liked her ever since they met.
It happened early in this year when he found her crying on the floor against his locker. The English teacher yapped at him for forgetting his copy of Fahrenheit 451 and sent him to his locker to get it. That’s where he found her for the first time.

Her head was lowered into her hands as her entire body shuddered with her continuous sobs. It was mostly quiet, so that he could only begin to hear it when he neared her.

For the first time in her first week of school, someone cared and listened to her instead of ignoring or bullying. What had made her upset was Henry Bowers and before he even asked the question, he knew the jerk was to blame.

Bill cheered her up in the few minutes he was supposed to be getting the book. Something he always remembers about that day was how he was instantly interested. When she initially lifted her tear-stained face up from her small palms, he thought she was beautiful.

And so when he walked back into the class with a smile on his face, he realized she’d made him forget about the book.

That day, she met the rest of the Losers and they’d never been separated since.

Now he stands awkwardly a few feet away from where Y/N stands and cringes inwardly at the tape she has trapped in her grasp. Bill can’t help but realize, this has to be the most embarrassing moment of their relationship so far.

“T-T-That’s a girl’s movie. I don’t like it-”

“You don’t have to hide it from me, you know. Maybe Richie or Henry and his goons but I won’t make fun of you. I liked the movie too,” Y/N says casually and leans against the rock.

It’s a tape he made of the soundtrack, since it still is on the radio all the time following the release of the cult classic. If anyone else found it…

He’s watched it more recently, now that he’s dating her, and admires the love story aspect of it. It reminds him of how he feels for Y/N. It makes him think about their relationship. It makes him smile.

“Whatever you say,” She sing-songs and pops the tape into the boombox.

The rhythmic tune starts to play softly, a background to the sounds of the water below and forest above them. Y/N glances over her shoulder at a nervous and completely embarrassed Bill. When their eyes meet, she can see him swallow back the lump in his throat and try to speak.

Usually, he’s comfortable and at ease around her. So his stutter is never that bad when they’re together. But he can’t start a sentence without stopping right now.

For a while the two just stand next to each other in silence, not quite sure what to do now. They were in the middle of a conversation when Y/N stood up to change the tape and now neither of them know where to start again.

“Do you w-want to dance?” Bill asks her softly, his fingers brushing hers as if to beckon her over.

Y/N laughs a little, and then nods.

“N-Nobody’ll see us. So if you end up being the worst dancer ever, at least I’ll be the only one to k-know.”

She throws her head back in a beautiful, dorky kind of laughter she only has around Bill alone. The entire night takes a turn from a relaxed date after swimming for a few hours to a goofy session of dancing.

Her arms fall over his shoulders and she stands on the balls of her feet to be face to face with him. The feeling of his blush, previously spread all over his face, slowly begins to fade from the intense redness to a twinge of pink on the apples of his pale cheeks. His hands respectfully stay at her ribs when they start to dance and he struggles to focus on what he’s doing while looking down at her.

The comparison of now versus the first day he met her is immeasurable. It baffles and dizzies him how two strangers can go from never having met to, well this. Dancing together with wet hair from swimming in the quarry, their middles pressing into each other as they clumsily sway back and forth. They aren’t good at it by any means, but being close to her and dancing with her like this makes his heart race.

“Bill!” She exclaims in pain and reaches to grab her foot.

“What happened?”

He didn’t even realize he’d stepped on her foot until she told him, looking up from where she was kneeled on the ground at him with a giggling laugh erupting from her chest. It surprised him to hear her laughing after that but she’s never been one to overreact.

“We’re a mess,” Y/N says in between gasping laughs.

The grip she has on his wrists is so tight that he ends up falling down to her, the weight of his body forcing her onto the ground.

Bill and Y/N stay like this, laughing so loudly that they’d likely scare away Bowers had he followed them here. The quarry is a place of sanctity and love, a place where they can kiss, dance, swim, cuddle, talk, and listen to music. The quarry is their place and so, when he draws up from where he was silently laughing in her shoulder to meet her eyes, he leans in.

Through their relationship, Bill has had many firsts. First girlfriend, first date, and recently had his first kiss. It was a normal day for them, riding their bikes around town with the rest of the Losers. The second he could get her alone is when he kissed her. For him to do that out of nowhere, took a lot of nerve and courage on his part, but it took both of them to a place they’d never been with another before. He’d planned the kiss all day and tried to get her alone every chance he got. And once it happened, more like after it happened, he was walking back to the group while he tried to fight the smile off his face.

His fingers splay across the side of her face, bringing her lips up to his as he gingerly kisses her. The music quietly hums in the background, setting a cadence for them through the speaker and every thought of how he was dancing with her left him immediately. All he could think about is how she made him feel and how he wants to feel this way for the rest of his life.

“Can you two stop kissing and come hang out with us now? All of this sneaking around is fucking annoying,” A familiar voice interrupts the moment.

Richie, with the rest of the Losers’ Club in tow behind him, stand a few feet away.

Bill and Y/N look up at them from where they’re laying on the ground in terror, pushing each other away frantically.

“W-W-What do you mean?”

The group of friends knew of the relationship since it started. Not only is it completely obvious, but Eddie ran after Bill when he noticed his absence and saw them kiss. Eds was only able to keep it a secret for five minutes before Richie knew something was off and got him to spill it. Suddenly all of the early endings to their hang outs and rain checks on days they were supposed to all ride around town together made sense.

“You two were kissing, like a minute ago, and we’ve known for a long time anyways,” Stanley says with a shrug and walks past them to look through the selection of music they have.

They’re pushed up on their knees, far apart from when Bill nearly jumped away from the kiss. She pushes a lock of hair behind her ear and gives a worried glance over to the boy.

“How’d you know?”

They all follow Stan and sit on the rock next to him, staring at the couple.

“Eddie saw you two kissing. Plus, it was super obvious. You two have the subtlety of a pipe bomb,” Beverly adds.

“Yeah. It didn’t take much to figure out. Why didn’t you tell us?”

After being so obviously smitten with each other from the get go and then their lack of subtlety in their secret relationship, the pieces weren’t hard to put together. Just by watching him when she’s near and taking note in the adoration in his eyes or the soft touches. You could tell.

Bill turns to look at her and shrugs, meeting his stare with the ground below him.

“W-We though you wouldn’t approve, it might feel a little weird to suddenly have a couple in the g-group,” He admits.

This is when the Losers go crazy. All of them start talking wildly, Bev and Eddie especially, about how ridiculous of a thought that is. They explain left and right with their voices overlapping that they don’t care and they’d rather have them at their hangouts than sneaking off.

“Guys,” Y/N raises her voice over everyone with a small laugh, “I’m sorry. I get it, it was probably a stupid worry anyways. We just-we didn’t want to throw off everyone. It seemed like it made sense at the time…”

Richie says, “Dude, we don’t care if you guys are dating. No matter how fucking gross seeing you guys kiss all the time is.”

He immediately gets a glare sent his way from Bill, who stand up with Y/N’s hand molded into his.

“Actually, for once, I agree with him. Mono is literally called the kissing disease. If I see you two kissing all the time I might throw up-” Eddie rambles and looks to his left at Mike for a agreement, but all the boy does is shrug.

The Losers go on talking about random things, stuff they did while Bill and Y/N were, as Stan calls it “off sinning without them”, and they ate the food they’d brought.

Essentially, the Losers crashed their date at the quarry. But now their relationship isn’t a secret and they know that their friends support them no matter what. They understand that they shouldn’t have been afraid of their disapproval because, no matter what, they’ll have each others’ backs.

It’s ten minutes into the newly crashed date when Richie stands up to change the tape that he had paid no mind to before, and busts out into an infectious fit of laughter as he knows that this is Bill’s music collection.

“Hey, Big Bill, is this your girlfriend’s tape or do you actually like Dirty Dancing?”

Bill’s eyes widen instantly and he rushes over to snatch the now not-so-secret tape out of his friend’s hands. It was one thing to have Y/N find the tape, but now Richie? He might as well have just dug his grave.

“Don’t get upset! Nobody puts Bill in a corner-”


I hope you liked it! I’m currently working on more stuff for Bill and the Losers right now. This was just a short little drabble I wrote because I think he’d do something like this lol.

I Don’t Even Know Your Name: Part One

Request: Can you do a request where y/n is a singer and she isn’t that famous but Shawn is like enamored by her and he sorta brings her to fame and she’s super shy and idk fluffy ending with some fluffy kisses???? 

A/N: At first this was meant to be just one imagine, but the plot that I came up with in my head is actually more lengthy than I planned. So I decided to make this into a series! 

Part Two 

Shawn watched the clock as he held his phone in his hands, bouncing his knee up and down. Time was ticking slower the more he could feel his anticipation grow. He’s been waiting for this the whole day. The possibility of miscalculating time zones constantly ran through his mind, but he made sure his math wasn’t even off by a minute. Her tweet did, in fact, say seven that night sharp and he was only five hours behind.

His phone suddenly interrupted the silence with a loud buzz, followed by a ding. Quickly clicking on the notification, he felt an immense amount of relief to see her face taking up the whole phone screen. She was obviously dressed for comfort with an oversized hoodie and her hair out of the way. A guitar rested on her lap, her body leaning over it as she scrolled through the comments.

“Good afternoon, well night,” she laughed. He watched as she gestured towards to what looked like her bedroom window. It was pitch black outside already. “Or morning. Depends where you are.”

Afternoon, Shawn thought to himself.

If only the whole world knew how much he was infatuated with her. At first, she was just one of those small singers that he would see when he scrolled through Instagram, but there was something about her that had caught his eye. Maybe it was the way she put her own twist on everything she did or the cute little wrinkle she would get whenever she scrunched up her face while singing a certain part. There were a million things.

“Good news, I’ve actually been writing a whole lot. I just have to start recording. It’s gonna take forever, but you guys are gonna like it.” She turned the camera towards a little corner in her room. “The next few weeks are gonna be spent right over there.” A microphone along with a whole set up consisting of a laptop and other equipment sat on a desk. “It’s my little makeshift recording studio.”

Shawn couldn’t imagine trying to record a song all by himself. There were so many technical things that went into it, but she did it all on her own. No record labels, no assistance, no nothing. It was just her, which was another thing he found captivating.

Her fingers gently strummed the strings, playing a soft chord. Shawn tried to figure out what tune she was humming, but he had no luck.

“I’ve been listening to The Neighborhood so much lately, so here’s a little taste of their song called The Beach,” she said repositioning herself.

If I told you that I loved you
Tell me, what would you say?
If I told you that I hated you
Would you go away?
Now I need your help with everything that I do
I don’t want to lie, I’ve been relying on you

All the stress that he carried on his shoulders melted away as soon as she started singing. There had always been something different about her voice that hit him like no other. Maybe it was how smooth it was, or the little rasp that would come out every once in awhile. He had never heard a voice quite like hers.

Fallin’ again, I need a pick-me-up
I’ve been callin’ you friend, I might need to give it up

I’m sick and I’m tired too
I can admit, I am not fireproof
I feel it burning me
I feel it burning you
I hope I don’t murder me
I hope I don’t burden you
If I do, I do

Her strumming had gotten louder, and so did her voice. Her eyes were closed with her eyebrows drawn close together, showing that little wrinkle he oh so loved. He could tell the chorus meant a lot to her and it worried him because there had to be a reason why. Judging by the lyrics, it couldn’t be a good one.

If I meet you in the middle maybe we could agree
You make me feel little how you’re looking at me
And you can throw me shade, all it does is just cool me off
First it just threw me off, now I’m just moving on

She couldn’t hide the smile that had etched onto her face as she sang the second verse, which told him that whatever caused the pain in the chorus was definitely gone now. Shawn started to feel himself smile along with her.

She finished the song with a small hum and opened her eyes again. Typically, her live streams started with a song that she picked out and one more that the viewers would request. Some days it would just be her messing around while answering questions. Today just happened to be the lucky day that she did both.

“What did I have for breakfast? Very strange question, but I had a parfait. I’m sorry if you were expecting pancakes or something,” she giggled.

“What’s my opinion on brown eyes? One hundred percent the most underrated eye color in the world. All the time I see brown-eyed people try to cover it up, and become really self-conscious along the way. It isn’t really such a big issue now, but I remember seeing it all the time back then and I was absolutely baffled by it. Sure, brown is the most common, but they’re definitely the most diverse in my opinion. There are so many shades!”

Shawn could feel his cheeks flush at the mention of even the tiniest relation to him. He never really thought about his own eye color until then. It was only a little part of him, but somehow she had put so much more meaning into it. It was a gift of hers, finding the simplest of things and making it sound like so much more, that is. It was one of the things that made her such a great songwriter.

“What do you think of Shawn Mendes?”

The mention of his name, more like the sound of her voice saying it, snapped him out of his thoughts, immediately putting him on edge. It felt like everything stopped and the only things that were moving were his heartbeat, that alarmingly pumped faster, and his leg that wouldn’t stop shaking. It was pathetic how much of an effect she had on him. An effect that she had even though she had never spoken to him.

“Where do I even begin?” she beamed, putting her hands up to her cheeks. A lame attempt to try and hide her heated face. “I’m not really one to listen to pop music that often, but his music is so good. I don’t know how he does it, a genius right there. Go listen to his new album if you haven’t already.”

Now he was the one who was blushing mad. Shawn was pretty sure he forgot how to breathe or how to do anything in fact. She listened to his music, gushed about it in fact. And there she sat, oblivious to the fact that the very person who she was talking about was watching her.

The connection lagged a little as she continued on, “Looks like you guys want me to cover him, which I’m totally down with.” Shawn couldn’t even think at this point. Now she was going to sing his song. The lyrics that he wrote. The chords that he recorded.

“Here’s I Don’t Even Know Your Name because it’s one of my favorites,” she smiled at the camera, which totally brought him back down to Earth. His heart fluttered when she started to sing again.

He remembered writing Handwritten, more specifically that song. When he finally came up with lyrics to the melody that he had been working on for so long, he was so proud of something that had turned out to be so good.

But it sounded even better when she sang it. She added something to the song that he couldn’t describe. He was able to pick out the way she added a soft high note in one line of the chorus and changed the order of some notes. Shawn didn’t know how she did it all so easily, but it was brilliant.

Even long after the live stream ended, he couldn’t stop thinking about it. One of her fans had recorded it and posted it on the internet so he could rewatch it anytime he wanted. And boy he did. He listened to it in the shower, the car, everywhere really.

Even backstage.

The show wasn’t supposed to start until five hours later and he didn’t have anything else to do. Soundcheck was already done and the Q&A wasn’t for a long time, so here he was. Listening to her again.

“Dude, I’m seriously starting to think you’re in love with her,” Geoff joked from the couch opposite of him. Shawn was laying down on the couch, balancing his laptop on his chest while he binge watched more of her covers.

Matt let out a laugh from behind him, “He probably is.” Rolling his eyes, he sat up and looked at the both of them.

“You don’t understand. She’s absolutely am—”

“Amazing, we know,” the two boys finished for him.

“And that she deserves more recognition and that she’s an amazing writer and….” he took a deep breath, “she’s really cute.” Shawn watched him with his eyebrows raised as he ticked off every statement with a finger on his hand.

“And don’t forget that she listens to your music!” Matt jumped in, ruffling his already messed up hair. “You know, you should give her a little shout out or something on Twitter. It’s pretty obvious how good she is, and I don’t think you’ll stop rambling about her until you do.”

Shawn chuckled at the last bit, flicking the back of Matt’s snap back off his head as he stood up and stretched. Needing a change of scenery, well walls, he shuffled towards the bathroom and leaned his hands on the counter. Matt’s words were still ringing in his ears, and Shawn had no idea how the idea didn’t come to him in the first place. It would definitely help her out, and that’s all it took for him to whip out his phone.

He quickly opened Twitter and as he hovered his thumb over the keyboard, he froze. What was he supposed to say? There were so many things about her. One hundred forty characters weren’t enough.

The next five minutes were spent typing a sentence or two out, but reading it over and erasing it. He didn’t want to say a simple “check this girl out, she’s really good” kind of thing. She was more than good. But he didn’t want to write too much. Everyone would probably think he was desperate, or something else the media can come up with.

It completely confused him why he was having such a hard time. He always knew what to say. Words easily rolled off his tongue.

Stop overthinking it, he thought to himself as he ran a hand through his hair. It shouldn’t be this hard. A minute passed when he felt his thumbs move on their own. He read the sentences over and over. Doubt started to cloud his thinking again. “You know what? Fuck it,” Shawn seethed and he pushed the submit button.

There was no going back now. Millions of people were reading it now, and he hoped she was too.

A Real Father

Request: Hey boo, if it’s not too much trouble and/or when you have time do you think you could do a Steve x Reader where the reader is a single mom to a young kid and basically sees Steve as their dad and when their biological dad tries to come around Steve is NOT HAVING IT? I could see Steve shutting that shit down for real… Thanks for your consideration! Xoxoxo @overlordred

A/N: “Sorry this went on a little longer than I intended.”

You sat on the sofa braiding your daughter’s hair while you watched a movie. She was content flipping through the pages of her picture book. She spent the entire day running around the park with Steve and she was tired but trying to fight it. As you combed through a section she broke the mutual quiet with a soft question.

“Is Daddy coming over later?” her voice was small and light as if she had been thinking the question for a very long time to no avail and now was trying to downplay her interest.

“I don’t know, he said he had some work stuff to do, but you spent all day with him.”

“Yeah, I want to spend even more time!” she exclaimed and you laughed a little.

“Why is that, Kira?”

“Because he’s lots of fun.”

“Steve is lots of fun, huh?”

“You guys are getting married, right?”

“Yeah, next year,” you answered.

“Will we move in with him then?”

“Yeah, we’ll be closer to your school,” you answered. She was quiet again, satisfied with the answers to her questions. Steve was a great a guy but he was not Kira’s biological father. You met him a while ago, back when you were pregnant with Kira and going through hell with her actual  father. The two of you met through Sam. He came by your place asking for somewhere to stay when his apartment was obliterated by some villain. He came with Captain America. You were quick to become friends with Steve, and after Kira was born and your previous relationship was all the way over, you let him take you out for a few dates. That proved to be one of the best decisions you’ve ever made. He was always respectful towards you and your baby, never keeping you out too late and even planning dates that Kira could come along on. Steve Rogers wasn’t hard to fall in love with by any means.

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[Lyrics at bottom of post, past all the footnotes.] 

Before anything else, I have to say I love Susan Boyle’s singing.  I saw an interview once where a guy who worked with her to record songs, said that he’s never really met someone like this before – where basically, if she identifies with the characters the song, her singing is amazing, and if she can’t identify, she doesn’t sing well at all.  Which is something that makes total sense to me.

It took me a long time to be able to watch or listen to her, though.  I found other people’s reactions to her painfully familiar.  I guess I identified with her too much.  Both in watching how other people treated her and talked about her, and watching her trying to adjust to the new attention and publicity in her life.  I was glad people were recognizing her talents, but I boiled over with rage at the fact that most of the people who put her on a pedestal now, would have continued making her the butt of every joke if they’d never realized how well she could sing.  It’s like her singing skills made her human, and that made me beyond enraged.  

Hearing stories of how even as an adult, little kids would find ways to poke fun at her in public, reminded me too much of my own life.  Having recognition of my humanity depend entirely on recognition of my talents – same.  Watching her try and fail – spectacularly and publicly at times – to handle the ugly side of celebrity… I’ve never been and hope I never will be a true celebrity, but I’ve had my fifteen minutes of fame (which I only consented to because I thought it would get certain messages out there and was told hiding from all publicity might be selfish) and it was one of the most miserable experiences of my life.  So there have been many times I’ve found it too acutely painful to follow her, because I could identify with too much of what I was hearing.  It was like touching a raw nerve, I couldn’t handle it so I just looked away.

And also… and also.  I recognized her the moment I first saw her.  I recognized her as ‘my type of people’.  (Something that, while it has more overlap with some labels than others, is not tied to one specific disability label.)  I was not surprised to hear she was labeled as having some kind of nonspecific developmental disability growing up.   I was thoroughly unsurprised when, after all the publicity, and after some very public meltdowns, she was diagnosed with autism(1).  These things were on the order of “How did other people not notice?”

Which leads me to a question I’ve had for a long time:

Some autistic people are absolutely and totally obsessed with finding and listing famous people that they believe are autistic.  Much of the time, the people they’re calling autistic are either undiagnosed now, or were born and died long before they could’ve been diagnosed, so they’re guessing.  (I’ve got some problems with that kind of guessing, at least the way they do it.)  Sometimes, they do list people who are officially diagnosed.  But at any rate…

Of currently-living people, Susan Boyle may be the most famous person on the planet with any kind of actual official autism label.  She’s not famous for having autism, but she’s famous and she’s been diagnosed with Asperger’s, and these are facts that are readily available.  She’s certainly way more famous than Temple Grandin – she’s a worldwide household name, Temple Grandin isn’t.

I have never seen Susan Boyle on a list of famous people with autism.  And these lists are circulating all the time.

There’s probably a lot of reasons this doesn’t happen.

But I suspect I know one reason that it sometimes doesn’t happen.

One way that I identified with her right off the bat – she’s embarrassing.

Before anyone gets mad at me for saying that, I’m not saying I’m embarrassed by her.  I am saying that lots of autistic people probably are.  I can’t explain how I know this.  I just know that she has qualities that I also have, and I have been outright described many times by other autistic people as so horribly embarrassing to look at that it’s a terrible thing that videos of me even exist, or that people look at those videos and pass them on.  

She’s visibly odd in ways that some of us are and some of us aren’t.  So am I.  We’re not visibly odd in identical ways, by any means.  But… I can sort of map out the reaction some people have to me, and map out the way she moves and responds to things around her, and map out the fact that some autistic people are not going to respond well to her.  Also our physical appearance is… I wouldn’t call us ugly (I find people with distinctive appearances attractive, actually – probably an outgrowth of faceblindness), but a lot of people definitely would.  And autistic people are far from immune to judging other autistic people based on things like our weight, face, dress sense, mannerisms, etc.  And while being nerdy and geeky have become cool in some circles, it’s still never cool to be dorky.  Susan and I are dorky.

Also I have to wonder if there’s any element of this related to the fact that she’s famous for something that’s part artistic skill (including both creativity and technical skills), and part emotional skill.  She’s got a great voice, but that’s not what people respond to.  People respond to her ability to put herself into the shoes of whoever the song’s point of view is from, and then translate that raw emotion into a way to use her talented singing voice.  If all she had was a good voice, nobody would know her.  What she has is empathy.

And according to stereotype, autistic people aren’t even supposed to have empathy, let alone rely on empathy to guide our greatest talents in life.  Even autistic people who know intellectually that this is not true, tend to view other people with autism as having talents primarily in technical areas, not emotional areas, and if they are in emotional areas, they’re to do with self-expression, not empathy.  But, in fact, some autistic people are if anything over-empathic to the point it can become painful, like another source of sensory overload.  I’m one of many such people.  She’s another.  And if she didn’t excel at putting herself in a character’s shoes and then expressing the innermost feelings of that character artistically, nobody would know or care who she was.

So I think all of those things add up to why she’s not on many – not on any I’ve seen, but I can’t claim to have seen them all – of those lists of “famous autistic people”.  Despite the fact that she’s world-famous and actually (unlike half the people on those lists) officially diagnosed.  It’s also possible that some of the people making those lists simply don’t know this about her, but I can’t buy that nobody making such a list would have noticed by now.

Mind you, I don’t think she’d care whether she’s on such a list or not.  She doesn’t strike me as someone who gets caught up in the identity of being an autistic person.  She strikes me as someone who sees that as one way of describing some of who she is, but that who sees themselves primarily from outside the lens of autism.  (Which I find refreshing.  People who get too caught up in autism-as-central-identity tend to lose sight of important parts of who they are, even if their view of autism is broader and more positive than the official one.  There’s something dehumanizing about the whole thing that even the most ardent supporters of ideas like ‘neurodiversity’ have never been able to fully remove from the concept of autism.)

The only reason I care, is that… well… I don’t like to see people treated as too embarrassing or too non-stereotypical for recognition of that kind.  And because I don’t know of anyone else who is both officially recognized as autistic and famous primarily for an empathic skill.  Lists of people who all have skills in roughly the same (usually science/technology/etc., sometimes artistic but still in a sense that’s viewed as somehow solitary and unconnected to people) skill areas, give the impression that we can only be good at things in a narrow range of areas.  Or even that we shouldn’t even try in other areas, because those things are ‘not for us’. And that can become incredibly limiting and confining. 

I have a friend who says that people with intellectual disabilities are often stereotyped (even by people trying to “highlight their strengths”) as ‘mindless hearts’, while autistic people are often stereotyped as ‘heartless minds’.(2)  It’s time people recognized that autistic people can be interested in or excel in “heart-related” areas and people with intellectual disabilities can be interested in or excel in “mind-related” areas.  But most of all, it’s time people recognized that all of us have both minds and hearts.

(1) I stopped differentiating between the different diagnostic sub-labels of autism long before the DSM lumped them all together as one diagnosis.  It’s not that we don’t vary from each other in important ways.  It’s just that those ways are not captured by any division anyone has ever come up with to split us up into categories, whether that’s “high functioning” or “low functioning” or purported differences between Asperger’s, autism, and PDDNOS.  Also, in times and places where various diagnostic labels have been used, they’re not always used by the book.  Meaning there are lots of people who fully more than qualified for a straight ‘autism’ diagnosis who were labeled with PDDNOS or Asperger’s because of age or stereotypes.  Age?  Adults getting an autism diagnosis are often labeled with Asperger’s whether they actually meet those criteria or not.  Because, even (as in one person I knew personally, and she was far from unique) in someone who didn’t speak a word until their mid-teens and grew up labeled with a severe intellectual disability, both of which make you disqualify massively for an Asperger diagnosis, the fact that she could talk in her late twenties meant she got diagnosed with Asperger’s.  She actually had mild Rett syndrome which was only discovered genetically after her daughter was born with severe Rett’s – but if they didn’t know about the Rett’s, the appropriate label would’ve been ‘autistic disorder’. 

It may seem odd that I care so much about people inappropriately getting Asperger’s diagnoses, if I don’t see Asperger’s as separate from autism.  The reason I care is that every time you get someone saying “If you made it to your thirties with no diagnosis you couldn’t possibly qualify for an autism diagnosis” or “If you’re talking really well now it doesn’t matter what your speech development was like,” it strengthens the stereotype that “real autism” can’t be missed in children and also strengthens the stereotype that every autistic person capable of talking to you about the matter actually “only” has Asperger’s and not “real autism”.  So it’s actually my objection to the way stereotypes are employed that makes me care about people using Asperger’s as a catch-all term for anyone who went undiagnosed until adulthood and anyone who can use language with superficial fluency at least some of the time.

So there ends my long explanation of that, there’s a reason I put it in a footnote.

(2) It’s more complicated than that.  Some of us get seen as both heartless and mindless.  Some autistic people (even without ID) get thrown into the mindless heart category.  And there’s a huge array of related disability stereotypes in general that I’d love to discuss someday.  But right now I don’t have the time or energy, so I’ll stick with my friend’s basic way of saying it.

LYRICS (”Mad World”, originally by Tears for Fears, as sung here by Susan Boyle, the lyrics are different from the original in some places):

All around me are familiar faces
Worn out places, worn out faces
Bright and early for the daily races
Going nowhere, going nowhere
Their tears are filling up their glasses
No expression, no expression
Hide my head I wanna drown my sorrow
No tomorrow, no tomorrow

And I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I’m dying
Are the best I’ve ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles
It’s a very, very
Mad world
Mad world

Children waiting for the day they feel good
Happy birthday, happy birthday
Want to feel the way every child should
Sit and listen, sit and listen
I went to school and I was very nervous
No one knew me, no one knew me
Hello teacher tell me what’s my lesson
Looked right through me
She looked right through me

And I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I’m dying
Are the best I’ve ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles
It’s a very, very
Mad world
Mad world

And I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I’m dying
Are the best I’ve ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles
It’s a very, very
Mad world
Sad world
Mad girl
Mad world

Hide and Seek - Batfam x YoungerSibling!Reader

@hevymetalbrokemychemicalromance asks: “Omg! Could we PLEASE have more younger!sibling reader? The Damian one was too cute!”

Warnings: swearing, if I missed anything please tell me :)

a/n: this took me forever, I’m so sorry @hevymetalbrokemychemicalromance. But I finally did it, and I really like how it came out and I hope you do too! As always, I can re-write if you don’t like it.

Y/N Kyle got a proper introduction to her family after meeting her beloved brother Dami. It was standard knowledge that everyone adored her. She became Gotham’s little princess overnight, although even at the age of 3 she insisted that being Gotham’s Wonder Woman would be much better. Her brothers undoubtedly adore her most, they spend most of their free time around the young girl as she brings a carefree feeling, which is refreshing to the four vigilantes. However, there is a stressor that she applies, and that is her ability to utterly destroy her four brothers in a game of hide and seek.

“Count to 300! You have to count to 300!” Y/N shouts at her brothers, who are all currently towering above her.

“How about you count to 300 this time and we hide, Little Bird?” Dick asks, as he bends down to become eye-level with the green-eyed girl. He prays she’ll accept, he’s so tired of having to hear Jason brag about how he always finds her first. At his request, Y/N stares at her eldest brother, staring him straight in the eye, blue meeting green in what appears to be a war of wills. It was clear that she would not be searching for her brothers.

“Okay, okay Little Bird, we’ll look for you.” Dick says, as he gets up and huffs a bit. He can hear Jason chuckling under his breath next to him, and he briefly considers punching the man.

“What is it, Grayson? Scared of a little 3-year-old girl?” Jason taunts, his face showing the infamous smirk he was known for.

“Yeah, you try looking her in the eye, Little Wing. It’s fucking terrifying. She’s already becoming Bruce. Or worse, Selina. It’s literally like looking Damian in the eye when you don’t let him get a hippopotamus for Christmas, but worse. So much worse.” Dick whispers, as Y/N is occupied playing with Tim’s hair.

“Oh dear god, she’s already mastered the stare? I mean the stare?” Jason asks incredulously, somewhat terrified that the darling little Y/N was growing up to be like her father already, but really they all developed The Stare™ shortly after entering the billionaire’s life. Dick just nods his head, confirming that she was developing her version of The Stare™, which she would more than likely use on criminals one day.

“Grayson, Todd. Stop gossiping about my sister and prepare yourselves to play hide and seek, it should be more difficult this time. Apparently, Y/N has found approximately 6 new hiding spots in addition to her old ones.” Damian states, to which his brothers both groan. If surely would be more difficult to find her.

“Wait, tater tot, how did you figure out she found new ones?” Jason asks, as he observes the room for any possible hiding spots.

“She told me, Todd. Because I am very clearly her favorite brother.” Damian answers, a smug and proud look upon his face that screams ‘I’m-fucking-better-than-you’. Jason lunges at Damian, attempting to grab him by the collar of his shirt.

“Listen here tater tot, I’m her favorite.” Jason claims, as he hears Dick scoff from behind him. The latter comes into view, shaking his head as he exclaims “No, you two, I am obviously her favorite. I let her eat cereal for dinner!”

“Well I’m the one who takes her for ice cream whenever she wants.” Jason insists. This was an ongoing theme between the brothers, debating and often fighting over who was dearest little Y/N’s favorite. A few windows had been broken due to this argument.

“You fools, I’m her favorite because I’m teaching her animal care and because I’m her actual brother.” Damian jests, he was always boastful of the fact that the two shared blood.

“And what the fuck is that supposed to mean? She doesn’t love any of us because we’re not related? Try again.” Dick rebuts, shaking his head and frowning at Damian.

“No, she doesn’t love you because you’re all. Literally. Fucking. Crazy.” A deadpan voice states, and the three brothers spin around to find Tim, who holds Y/N on his shoulders as she plays with his hair, putting it into a ponytail, then taking it out and ruffling it, and repeating the process again. Y/N giggles at the sight of her brothers all being disgruntled messes.

“Down! Down, Tim!” She exclaims, letting her brother know that she wanted to be off of his shoulders. Once on the ground, Y/N pushes Tim towards Jason, Dick, and Damian, who she makes sure are all in a line before donning a serious face that her brothers can just not take seriously.

“Listen! We awe going to play hide and seek now. Count to one-hundwed and covoy yoy eyes.” Y/N orders, as she paces the floor in front of her line of brothers. She still couldn’t pronounce R’s.

“Yes ma’am.” Jason declares, as the boys all split up, heading to four different quarters of the Manor, while their sister remains where she was.

“And 100.” Tim whispers, finishing off his count of 100, as he knew his brothers were doing as well. He was bound and determined to find her first. Whoever found Y/N first was declared “Best Brother of the Week” and got a little plastic princess tiara and an official certificate, which was a drawing Y/N made that was specific to that week’s winner. He wanted those prizes, it had been 3 weeks since he had them. Jason had managed to stay on top for those 3 weeks, finding her first each and every time. But that would change, Tim would be the one to find her.

Damian stalked the halls, searching in every little nook and cranny that he thought his sister knew of. He was going to win. He was going to prove to Grayson and Todd and Drake that he was the favorite and the best brother. He already knew he was the favorite and best, but he needed something to rub in their face, and the tiara, which he claims to not wear but does in every moment alone, and certificate were just that thing.

Dick looked in odd places, places that a child would very clearly not go. He was in the kitchen at the moment, checking cabinets and drawers. He knew it wasn’t likely, but his baby sis was tiny, so maybe she’d be there? He then searched the Cave, before remembering that Y/N was nowhere near tall enough to change the hands of the grandfather clock. And now he was putting his acrobatic skills to good use, as he dangled from the chandelier in the entryway to get a grand view of the surrounding areas. And yes, yes he did sing the Sia song while he was there.

“Y/N, Y/N c’mon out.” Jason says softly, urging his baby sister to come out of hiding. With him he carried two ice cream cones, licking away at one and saving the other for Y/N. Most times when Y/N saw that her big brother Jay had ice cream, she’d purposely make noise for him to find her. He always found her regardless, he knew where she was before she made the sound, but Jason was dramatic and so was Y/N, so he always played along with her game. Oh, and the ice cream really made her overexaggerate how he was just the “bestest brother in the whole wide wowld” and he lived off of that shit. However, today the little girl was nowhere to be found.

“Where is she, I promise I searched everywhere! Everywhere!”

“Her ice creams melting, she wouldn’t ever let that happen.”

“Guys, I’m starting to get worried, none of us have found her.”

“If my sister is lost on account of you idiots not doing your job well enough, I swear to whatever god is listening that I will kill you all.”

These were all comments that could be heard coming the living room of Wayne Manor. It had beem three and a half hours. Three and a half hours and they hadn’t found Y/N. Pride and arrogance dissipated into worry and fear. Sure, it wasn’t at all possible that anyone could’ve gotten in and taken her, but could she have hurt herself? Getting lost in the manor was easy, as was getting injured.

Jason and Tim paced the floor next to each other, as Dick ran frantically around the manor, moving as fast as he could, while Damian was searching the surveillance of the house to see if he could trace where she went, but after heading into her closet, which they had checked and she wasn’t there, she was nowhere to be found.

“Fuck! Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!” Jason shouts, before punching a throw pillow that had been resting on the nearest couch.

“Bruce is going to kill us.” Dick mutters, his breath coming out short from both running and fear.

“God, we’re fucking idiots.” Tim groans out, as he rests his face in his hands.

“Stop sitting around and wasting time! We need to find her. We need to.” Damian orders, but his voice cracks at the end, and the tears welling up in his bluish green eyes are visible.

“Hey, hey listen. We’ll find her. We’ll find her Damian.” Dick says, as he pulls Damian into a short-lasting hug.

All four hearts practically stop beating as they hear a door open. In the door is their father, who is visibly confused as to why his sons are huddled together, looking a complete mess.

“What’s going on here?” Bruce asks, surveying the situation carefully. He looks at his boys, who all have a mixture of worry and guilt plastered on their faces.

“Bruce…we were, ah, playing hide and seek with Y/N like we always do on Saturdays. And…and…we can’t find her.” Dick takes the liberty of explaining, his voice descending decibels until he ends on a whisper, quickly wiping the few tears that were falling from his eyes.

For just a moment, a tiny moment, Bruce looked ready to end the entire world, destroy everyone and everything in his way, but then there was a look of calm. And to shock everyone, he cracked a genuine, albeit small, smile.

“Why the fuck are you smiling, old man? Our sister’s lost.” Jason croaks out, he’s not crying, but he’s not okay either.

Wordlessly Bruce brushes past his boys, walking into the living room where he drops the briefcase he was carrying, sheds the suit jacket he was wearing, and walks over to the fireplace mantle. The boys stare in confusion as their dad runs his hands along the crown molding of the mantle, and then stare in even more confusion as a small piece of the wall slides up to reveal a scanner, which Bruce uses to scan his eye.

Suddenly, a 4 foot tall, 3 foot wide section of the wall raises up, revealing Y/N, who promptly runs out screaming of excitement about her father being home.

“Daddy! Daddy, daddy! You found me! Daddy’s the best! Daddy’s the best!” She exclaims, as she hugs Bruce’s legs, before he picks her up.

Bruce looks at his sons, who are all very clearly shocked as they had forgotten about the emergency hiding place set in plan for Y/N, shaking his head and smirking a bit as he walks past them, saying only one thing as he heads to the kitchen with his daughter,


Chapter 24 - Lesson 4

Originally posted by soobadnoonecanstopher

Chapter One & Two  Chapter 3  Chapter 4  Chapter 5  Chapter 6  Chapter 7  Chapter 8  Chapter 9  Chapter 10 Chapter 11 Chapter 12 Chapter 13 Chapter 14 Chapter 15 Chapter 16 Chapter 17 Chapter 18 Chapter 19 Chapter 20 Chapter 21 Chapter 22  Chapter 23

“Aww come on Y/N, let me see. I promise I won’t tell.”

“For the tenth time Minseok, no. You can wait and be just as surprised as everyone else.” He’d spent the better part of the last half hour trying to convince you to show him but you weren’t budging on the topic.

“Except Sehun & Yixing…” You heard his mumbled comment and walked straight back over to the bed.

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Slow Down (Requested)

Pairing: MCU!Peter Parker x Reader
Request: @spidermax Soo umm I dont have anything too specific in my mind and i also want to give you some space but my main idea would be that Peter and the reader are best friends and they know about him being spiderman + late movie nights and fluff and a nerdy love confession if that is possible?
Featuring: Ned
Word Count: 2178 Words 
Warning: fluff, pinning, swearing(?) 
A/N: this is so fluffy you could choke on it  
Tagging:@notsoprettykitty @hecates-garden 

Originally posted by tom-cinnamonroll-holland

((gif not mine, credit to owner))


Another day. Peter thought as a yawned pulled from his lips. He tugged on the sleeves of his sweater, head bopping to the song streaming into his ears. Another day at school. Peter sighed at the thought, wanting nothing more than the day to be over before it even started. The only good thing about school was Peter’s friends. Sure school came easily to Peter, but he’d rather be out swinging from building to building, helping people instead of learning about conjugations. Although, some days school was easier to handle than others, but as the day started, Peter could feel the day would somehow stretch over an eternity.

Maybe it was the muggy weather, or the beating Peter was dealt last night, but the whole world felt like a crappy action movie with too much slow motion. His body ached faintly as his reached his locker, forehead pressed against the cool metal. He stayed unmoved until Ned made his way over, voice cheery as per usually. “I saw you on the news last night.” Ned said, leaning on the locker beside Peter’s before shoving him for some sort of a response. “Sorry Ned, I’m just tired.” He said before taking in a sharp breath and opening his locker.

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[TRANS] 170528 Lee Youjin V Live Broadcast (PD101S2)

Lee Youjin, one of the eliminated trainees from Produce 101, held a live broadcast on Namoo Actors V App channel last night! He answered fan questions and talked about his time in Produce 101 so here are some highlights about what he said about the other trainees.

Fan Questions:

  • The trainees he was closest to were his roommates at the start of the program! He roomed with Yoon Jisung, Kim Sihyun, Lee Hoorim, Kim Hyunwoo from YG K+. He couldn’t give Jisung a call bc he was probably busy (the only one left on the show).
  • He talked about how he was the leader twice during (for Be Mine team 2 and Rhythm Ta). He thought being leader would be easy bc he only needed to guide and lead the other members but it was a lot more difficult than he thought.
  • For Be Mine, he couldn’t really help the other members with learning the dance so he felt sorry towards them. Maybe if he had chosen an easier song they wouldn’t have had such a hard time. “Truthfully i couldn’t be of any help to the others, but through our struggles we got closer and did well.“
  • He really likes Park Jaebum’s (Jay Park) style so that’s the reason why he chose some of the concepts that he did on PD101! He wanted to be sexy like him (t/n: I think he’s talking about his performance evaluation)
  • The staff played Pick Me in the background but since he was caught off guard, he was able to dance only part of it. He said the trainees practiced it so much he could do the dance in his sleep.
  • He promised to try and call Taewoo later! He’s in a group chat with Taewoo and Taemin so they talk a lot. They’re really fun and interesting.
  • A fan commented “add me to the chat too~” so he said “send us your ID (t/n: kakaotalk ID)” lol
  • A fan asked “Who is the most handsome in PD101″ and he said “Everyone is handsome!”
  • He showed off the headphones he got for completing the first stage of maboy.

Youjin’s Pick Corner! 

  • The staff set up a bracket board to see who Youjin’s pick was among his fellow contestants on PD101. When he saw the board he said, “Wow, this is like picking for the World Cup.”
  • First Round:
    • Lee Woojin vs. Kim Yongguk vs. Jung Sewoon (he said Woojin is cute but Sewoon really helped him with the hardships of being a leader. Even though they weren’t close, they talked and texted so he was really touched. That’s why he picked Sewoon)
    • Lee Insoo vs. Hong Eunki vs. Kang Daniel (he chose Daniel bc he was the leader for 열어줘 and taught them a lot. Youjin said everyone in the group was already good so he had to match them well)
    • Kim Donghyun vs. Im Youngmin vs. Joo Jinwoo (he depended on Youngmin a lot during Be Mine and is very thankful towards him)
    • Kang Dongho vs. Takada Kenta vs. Kim Taewoo (he picked Taewoo bc he’s funny, sings well, and is bright. He got really close to him during the show)
    • Lee Kiwon vs. Yoon Heeseok vs. Kim Seonglee (he picked Seonglee and said he had enough skills to compete in any program. During practice he would lift the mood and make the trainees happy but it wasn’t broadcasted)
    • Lee Gwanghyun vs. Park Sungwoo (he picked Sungwoo and pet the sticker with his face on it lolol. Although Sungwoo endured a lot, he was always by Youjin’s side. They were together for Be Mine and also for 열어줘 before being eliminated. Even though Youjin was having a hard time too, he felt sorry for not being able to help him)
  • Second Round:
    • Jung Sewoon vs. Kang Daniel
    • Im Youngmin vs. Kim Taewoo (he chose Taewoo bc they both fell down the ranks together(?) lol)
    • Kim Seonglee vs. Park Sungwoo (he chose Sungwoo bc he went through a lot of hardships)
  • Third Round:
    • Kang Daniel vs. Kim Taewoo
    • Park Sungwoo (automatic win)
  • FInal Round:
    • Kim Taewoo vs. Park Sungwoo (when he chose Taewoo, he put his sticker on the #1 spot and pat it several times; “It’s a pity that it’s not broadcasted but he’s really funny. We practiced a lot together.”)
  • Note: I’ll be subbing this segment and posting it on YouTube soon! I’ll link it here when it’s done and uploaded.

Update: here is the subbed segment!

More unrelated PD101 things are under the cut!
Translation by @softsnuper (may not be 100% accurate)

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Let me know

Originally posted by donewithjeon

☽Pairing☾ ; Taehyung | Reader

☽Genre☾ ; Angst

☽Word Count☾ ; 1.9k

☽Note☾ ; I only speak from my own experience.

☽Warnings☾ ; Depression | Mental illness 

“How is it going Y/N?”

A question shot into the frigid air of any type of office room, displayed with flowers, plants and simple dull paintings from kids that has been through your stage in early age. The woman in front, tipped her glasses onto the right spot, finding the clock ticking becoming louder and louder.

“It’s going well. Still tired” You simply answered, fiddling your thumbs as a mechanism of forgetting the demons, which haunts you whenever there is an opportunity to taunt your life.

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Two Ghosts

Summary: You and Bucky realize your relationship is not what it used to be, it doesn’t feel right anymore.

A/N: Got this idea from Two Ghosts by Harry Styles. Been listening to his album non stop, it’s a masterpiece. Just got inspiration from this song. Now there are lyrics in the middle of the fic, I didn’t take every little word into account but… hope you like it. This is the one and only part for this imagine. I just felt the need to write this. I was having a bad day, feeling sad for no specific reason and just needed a good cry. Decided to write something angsty, it worked.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader

Words: 2,713


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Seventeen All Unit Reaction: “S/O Dancing to Gashina - Sunmi”

‘@ayyybangtantrash : Helloooo! Can I make a request of SVT reaction to their S/O dancing to Gashina (Sunmi)? I’d appreciate it so much, thank you! <3

Helloooo!! Here you go lovely! Hope you like it!! Also guys - check out the song it’s pretty cool and really catchy like seriously! <3 Luna 

*And as always! This is just a reaction, it is in no way real, not made to offend anyone and should not be taken as being in any way serious! I will state what gifs are mine!!*


*gif by me*

You had been alone in your apartment when Scoups had turned up unannounced. You had been blasting ‘Gashina” and he had heard it from the lift. 

“Y/N!?” he shouted walking through the only to see you, laying amongst a pile of your clothes in the bedroom singing at the top of your lungs. Seungcheol burst out laughing immediately. 

You jumped out of the pile hurrying to turn the stereo off. “What are you doing here?!” you snapped, the embarrassment flushing in your cheeks. “You said you had practice tonight.”

Seungcheol couldn’t keep a straight face as you started to pick up all the clothes off the floor. “I’m sorry Y/N,” he laughed covering his face as he started to snigger again. The tears were in his eyes as he tried to contain himself. 

“You know, just because you’ve got a key doesn’t mean you can just…!” 

Seungcheol cut you off with a kiss before you could get anymore embarrassed. “Y/N chill. I mean, you’ve seen me do more embarrassing things than this.”


*gif by me*

You had been in the shower listening to tunes when Gashina had come on. You hadn’t heard Jeonghan move, let alone appear in the doorway. 

So, as expected you were dancing around in nothing more than your underwear. Jeonghan didn’t say anything as you sang into the hair dryer, your hair blowing all over the place.

Then you screamed. “Jeonghan!!!” He didn’t jump, he didn’t move, he merely smiled expecting this kind of reaction from you. 

That was when he started to laugh, mimicking your dance moves in the doorway as the pillow was thrown. “Oh come on Y/N! It was sexy!” he laughed dodging another pillow aimed directly for him. “I’ve seen you in your underwear before Y/N! What makes this so different?” he laughed jumping backwards as you ran over. 

“You’re such a perv!” you shouted kicking him from the room just so you could finish changing. But, even with the door shut you could hear him laughing. “STOP! It’s not funny!!”


*gif by me*

You had been sitting quietly in the back of the studio while Jihoon had been working on another song. Jihoon had been working solid for days So after another round of pouting at him, he finally let you come along. As long as you didn’t distract him.

Jihoon had his back to you. The keys of his computer were clicking away rhythmically and he was in the zone. You on the other hand were listening to music on your laptop with headphones in when Gashina had come on.

Without meaning to you started dancing around in your seat. You had been mouthing the words, swinging your arms around like an idiot and trying not to laugh so he wouldn’t know what you were doing. You had hoped he couldn’t see you…

Then he spun around in his chair, a grin spreading from ear to ear as he sniggered, “I can see you.”

You pulled the headphones from your ears, feeling your face flush red. “Hmmm? I wasn’t doing anything…”

“Y/N I can see you in the computer screen. And you were singing pretty loud!” he laughed shaking his head and turning back to his computer. 

“Sorry,” you whispered about to put your headphones back in when the track started to play loud overhead. “Might as well put your talents to good use,” he sniggered reaching for your hand. 


*gif by me*

Who are we kidding with Hoshi - you would definitely be the one to walk in on him dancing to Gashina. 

You had decided to go and see him at practice when you wandered into something a little different. Hoshi, Jun, Minghao and Chan were all dancing in sync to Gashina. “Well, I think I should go…” you said placing the tray of coffee on the floor and slowly backing towards the door.

“No! No! Y/N we need you! You’re a pro at this song!” Hoshi cried running over and grabbing your hand. “I mean the other day…”

You grabbing his waist quickly tickling him so the embarrassment of earlier that week hadn’t been revealed. Yes he’d caught you dancing around to this song. Yes, it had been embarrassing. But, now what was worse your dance had proven inspiration for a cover.

“Show me how you did it the other day,” he said through a fit of giggles. He mimicked the sexy sway you had done, just as he had entered the room and caught you. 

“No!” you squealed covering your face immediately as the other members stared at you questioningly. “You’re such a…” Hoshi pecked your lips quickly before you could insult him. 

“You love me really.”


*gif by me*

Joshua had been laying on the sofa sleeping when you had started to clean the dorm. He’d been at practice all night, and as far as you were aware he’d be sleeping long into the afternoon. 

So, with your headphones in you danced around the dorm cleaning dishes, making the bed and then you started to clean the bathroom. Only issue was, Gashina came on the mix. And, like any sane person you started to reenact the music video. More specifically simply laying in an empty bath.

You didn’t realise you’d been singing out loud. Nor had you realised you had woken Jisoo up. “Y/N what are you…?” he rounded the bathroom door and stopped midway. 

“Hey…” you said quietly pulling the headphones off your head and sniggering. “You were supposed to be sleeping.”

He shook his head taking the headphones from you and jumping in the bath with you. The two of you simply sat there singing along to the track and dancing until the door opened and Seokmin stood there. “Seriously guys! I need to pee!”


*gif by me*

You had been raving about Sunmi’s song to Jun for the past couple of days. So when you had asked him to teach you the dance he agreed. Purely because he’d do anything to make you happy.

Jun had learnt the dance for you and when practice was over he called you over. For a couple of nights he patiently taught you the dance until he thought you had mastered it.

“That was amazing Y/N!” he cheered throwing you a high five. 

“Really!?” you couldn’t stop the smile on your face as you hugged him quickly. “Thank you Junhui!” 

“You do know you can’t tell anyone I taught you this…”

You grinned comically, aiming a light punch for his stomach. “Aww Jun, are you embarrassed?” 

He shook his head quickly. “Dance is nothing to be embarrassed about Y/N! I just meant, don’t tell anyone because that means you can take whole credit for how good you are…”

You couldn’t stop but kiss his lips quickly. “Jun, we did it together. I’m obviously going to tell people you helped me.”

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Aimless - Tenacious Part 3 (13.4k)

Guys it’s actually here i’m dying and this took me a whole week okay pls reblog or somethin’. Give me some slack for making them bigger and better each time pls. Some smut, mild angst, adventure, and swearing and robbing and hurting ppl ok? That’s the warning. This is a moving gif fic, where I incorporate gifs of a song into this. That song will be Run. 


The crew and you rove throughout the town’s and cities, causing havoc while occurrences of inner turmoil from the youngest spouts from the leader’s day’s of ruling their gang to be long overdue.

Tenacious 1-?

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I am reviewing the song Carolina from HS1 tomorrow night but this was fresh in my mind and I wanted to get it out before I lost the thought process (and also because I’m bored). I would like to weigh in on the story and controversy that’s been circling about this particular song. No, I’m not talking about the drugs debate (though that will be mentioned). I am referring to the girl that this song is supposedly written about.

This particular story is an absolute mess and, as many people (including his diehard fans) have been pointing out - there is something about it that simply does not add up and I’ve been trying to process it. 

Here’s the general story:

So, Harry Styles met this girl. How, when, and where he met her; we have no idea. At least I have no knowledge of these facts. That’s not important. The important thing is that he met this girl and she made some sort of impression on him. Something that he obviously liked.

Skipping forward months or years to when he begins work on his first solo album: Harry Styles decides to write a song about this girl and put it in the track list. 

This is something that this girl has absolutely no knowledge of. Harry Styles, himself, has admitted that in multiple interviews.

Apple Music Documentary: 

I: Does she know a songs been written about her?

H: She does not. 

Radio 1 with Nick Grimshaw 6/12/2017

N: Do they know it’s about them or did they just put, like, on the telly…

H: They do now, yeah. 


N: So, you didn’t say, “By the way, I’ve written this massive song for you?”

H: No. 

N: You don’t tell people.

H: No.

N: It’s just a surprise. So, someone could be listening today whose not heard the album and say, “Hang on, that’s about me!”

H: Potentially. 

Now, I’m not saying that it’s a bad thing to write a song about someone specific. Everybody does it. Many people wouldn’t be able to write successfully if they didn’t. However, I’ll get to why this raises a few eyebrows in this particular case in a second.

I get the feeling that this was supposed to come off as relatively cute because there was another section of the story that has more or less been forgotten about now. Supposedly Harry wanted to see this girl again. He’d forgotten her name and had no way of knowing how to contact her. This could lead people to believe that this was potentially leading up to a cute, romantic relationship reveal. Again, I’ll get to why this is weird in a second.

Going back to the song; anybody would be absolutely flattered that someone had written a song about them. This is Harry fricken Styles and he has written a song about her. However, the circumstances under which this girl found out were less than ideal.

Her father was the one who put the pieces together after Harry Styles had performed the song live on the Today Show. 

How do we know that she found out through her father? Harry Styles told Nick Grimshaw live on Radio 1 the day that his album released. 

Radio 1 with Nick Grimshaw 6/12/2017

H: The person who it’s about, I found out how they found out it was on there, and their dad watches the Today Show and he, like, left her a voicemail saying “Um, I think he just sang a song about you on the TV.

This is also where we reach our first glitch in this story:

Remember that part I mentioned earlier where it was presumed that Harry Styles had forgotten her name and had no way of contacting her but wanted to get in touch with her again? 

The lyrics even claim I met her once and wrote a song about her. 

Well, we have multiple pieces of evidence that can prove that these two have kept in touch with each other since they met. How do we know this?

1. The obvious fact that Harry Styles knows how she found out that the song was about her. From the way that he tells that story, you could easily assume that she was the one who told him in the first place.

2. In his Apple Music Documentary, Harry Styles was asked specifically if he had ever seen this girl since he’d met her. 

Apple Music Documentary

I: Have you seen the girl since?

H: I have. 

From those two slips in the story, we can easily assume that these two people have been in some kind of communication since they met.

It gets worse…this goes on to the be the only song that Harry Styles has ever, EVER been open and honest about in the entirety of his career. Even his diehard fans have found this odd. If you’re a fan of Harry Styles, you know that he has never once openly discussed what a song is about or it’s backstory. 

Where is the evidence that he’s been open about this song? Take a look at any interview in which he is asked about ‘Carolina.’ There is no hesitation in his answers.

Radio 1 with Nick Grimshaw 6/12/2017

N: Now, is this about a specific person, this song?

H: Uh, yeah. 

N: Are they from Carolina, I’m guessing?

H: Yeah. 


N: Who’s it about then?

H: Someone from Carolina, I think… (jokingly)

H: But her name is it in so…I’m a bit…fucked with that one.

This leads Harry Styles fans on this frantic search to figure out who this girl is. Not that it’s any of their business but I don’t want to get into that…

Anyway, it turns out that this particular song has enough personal information in it in order for Harry Styles fan base to figure out exactly who this girl is.

Do you remember these pictures? That is supposedly her. How did the fans figure this out? I have no idea. They’re geniuses.  

Hold on though, that’s not even the best part. She was practically laid out on a silver platter for the fans to find. The only way that the fans were able to find this girl and know for a fact that she was indeed the one is solely because she is followed by an Azoff on multiple social media accounts.

Speaking of social media, as soon as this manhunt begins, she immediately puts all of her social media accounts on private. Though, I would argue that she waited for the fans to find her before she did.

So, what exactly is happening here? At first, I thought that it might have been a pure publicity stunt. There was a theory going around that this particular song was about cocaine. Perhaps Harry’s team wanted to debunk that rumor without words (even though he’s going for a rock n roll image…) but also give him as much publicity as possible. However, that theory changed when the girl was discovered and completely debunked when she made her accounts private.

No matter what version of the story you believe or how you believe it happened, it is very unmistakably obvious that this particular girl is being used for publicity reasons. It paints Harry Styles in a very bad light when you also consider the fact that every version of the story has him claiming that she had no knowledge of what was about to happen. In other words, they did this without so much of a warning to her or her consent.

Now…that’s not to say that she couldn’t be involved. She very well could be. After all, Harry Styles slipped up a few times and practically revealed that they have kept in touch. I could be wrong but I honestly do not understand how else he would have found out the story about her father. If he hasn’t kept in touch with her, somebody has. 

Either way you decide look at it, she’s being used for publicity. Whether she knew it was going to happen or not is an entirely different argument or a different day. Also, either way you look at it, there will be multiple points that do not completely line up with each other. A classic example of two truths and a lie because a lie is best hidden between two truths. Which part is truth and which part is lie, we will probably never know. However, based off of her general social media reaction, it is my belief that she had no knowledge of what was about to take place and if, she had any knowledge of how vicious the 1D fanbase can be, she was very smart to make herself private early on.  

There have also been rumors that Carolina will most likely be the next single from the album. This, however, would paint Harry Styles in a very bad light once again. He already has a potential girlfriend in the media (Tess), some people believe he has something going on behind the scenes with Mitch (his lead guitarist), AND there are rumors going around that he’s having a baby or has had a baby with an ex-girlfriend because of the song Kiwi. Now, they wanted to add this ‘Carolina’ girl into the mix?

Good luck getting rid of that womanizer image now, Harry Styles. If that’s even what you want…

10 pieces under 10 minutes

If you follow my blog, you know that I love classical music and music history [and let’s face it, you probably do too]. But when people who want to get into the genre ask me for recommendations, I don’t know what to choose. The problem is the sheer AMOUNT of music out there…we’re talking hundreds of years worth of music to go through…so I decided to narrow down a list of ten pieces I’d recommend to anyone who’s new to classical and wants to explore more. Also, because time length was a major factor when I started out listening, I’ll keep the pieces relatively short, and I’ll try to pick music for different ensembles, from different time periods, and for different moods. This list is directed to complete newcomers to the genre, so if you’re into classical and want to read this, don’t get too concerned about the different titles and what they mean yet [i.e. you don’t need to know what makes a sonata a sonata in order to enjoy it], check out whichever of the pieces in the list stand out to you. If you like them and want more recommendations, you could always message me. My list of 10 pieces under 10 minutes:

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Summary: A legend, the baddest of the bad. You had a reputation to uphold your senior year of High School, one of which was red lipstick, petite outfits, and leather jackets. However, when your friends Rey and Phasma convince you to join the cheerleading team, your reputation gets compromised in the most flavorful of ways. 

A/N: GUYS. I’m so so so sorry for the delay in posting this chapter, and just being slow af with everything all together. But here it is, chapter seven. Feedback is always appreciated-hope you enjoy. xoxo.

Words: 3.5 K +

Warning: None

Kylo adjusted the strap of his bag over his shoulder while moving down the hall and looking around. With the flow of students seeping from every door, never-ending to cease, Kylo’s height served him well in being able to search for people. 

Or, more exclusively, you.

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Pilot with a Fear of Heights

A/N: Hey I’m back with some Stenbrough this time!! I love how pure this ship is except Stan is a thot in my mind but ANYWAY. I loved writing this because i love this song. They’re in their senior year in this to match the song. 

Pairing: Stan Uris/Bill Denbrough

Based off of the song Pilot with a Fear of Heights by Felicity aka @aphof5 (follow her she’s aesthetic af and also one of my best friends and the nicest person I know). 

Warnings: Cursing, PDA (sort of? nobody really sees), kissing, Stanley getting no sleep rip, and a little bit of internal/external homophobia

Please listen to the song if you haven’t before! It’s wonderful and will also make reading this a lot better!!

Stan stood at the bridge. He stares down into the water rushing under him, the sky dark and full of stars, as it was nearing the early hours of the morning. He couldn’t stop thinking, and it kept him up. The confinements of his bedroom were simply not big enough for all the wild thoughts racing through his head. He left, not even bothering to grab a jacket. It was late September, so he didn’t really need one. Derry wasn’t cold enough for one yet, and he needed to feel the brisk air on his skin.

He worked his brain as he looked at the miniscule skyline of his hometown, thinking of everything that he’s been through. He and the other seven would be graduating this year, and they all knew they were getting out of this hell town as soon as they could. The only problem was, most of them had no idea where they were going to go. Stan was terrified he was never going to talk to his losers again, or at least not for twenty-seven years.

There was one specific loser he thought most about, though. The boy who still had a lingering stutter, the boy who convinced Stan to go to more football games than he could count, the boy who had lost his brother thanks to the beast they had faced, the boy who Stan was thinking about all night was Bill Denbrough, and it terrified him.

Stan was hoping that the thoughts and the feelings would fade, that they would turn into ghosts, like the rest of his memories of Derry did. He was the Rabi’s son, he knew that the thoughts and feelings were unnatural. There was no such luck however in the thoughts fading, as Stanley Uris’s weakness, his addiction, was Bill.

It took Stan all night and most of the early morning to come to the conclusion that he wasn’t scared of the thoughts, he was exhilarated. Bill was someone who brought out his biggest fears, but Stan felt that when he was around the boy, his fears didn’t even matter.

Stan watched as the sun rose, passing over the slowly growing town of Derry, and realized that he was running out of time. There were mere months before the lucky seven would split up, and just as the sun rose, so did Stan’s confidence. He looks at his watch, surprisingly reading that it was a bit past six in the morning. Stan knows that at precisely six-thirty every morning, Bill Denbrough wakes up, brushes his teeth, eats breakfast, and goes on a morning jog. There was still time to meet him before he went back inside to get ready for their school day, and with that thought, Stan started sprinting towards Bill’s house.

By the time Stan reaches his best friend’s house, his heart is racing, and not just from the non-stop sprinting he just did. He’s literally been thinking about Bill all night; like a pilot with a fear of heights. It wasn’t terrifying anymore though, it felt like he was freefalling. He sees Bill climbing up his porch steps, and even though there’s barely any air left in his lungs, he screams;


The boy turns around, his feet on different steps, and wrinkles his eyebrows in confusion. It was seven-fifteen in the morning, what was Stan doing at his house? Were those the same clothes he wore yesterday? Had he even gotten any sleep?

“A-Are you o-o-okay Stan? Wuh-what’s w-w-wrong?” Bill questions worriedly.

“I’m fine. Well sort of. I’m pretty sure I’m in love with you.” Stan blurts out as well as he can with his lack of oxygen.

“W-what?” Bill barely whispers, but before he can continue, Stan rambles on, not even giving Bill a real chance to react.

“I know that I’m not supposed to, but I can’t help it. I just want to feel something different than what this fucking town makes me feel. I want a new beginning, and I want one with you. When I think about you, it scares the shit out of me, but in a good way, you know? Whenever I think about you my heart just sort of… sings? It sings.” Stan rushes out, and he suddenly realizes that Bill Denbrough is blatantly staring at him.

“And I’ve realized that for me, everything has to be perfectly in order. I made my bed three times last night to try and calm myself down, but I couldn’t. I broke my routine because I couldn’t stop thinking about you.” Stan continues, and he hears Bill’s Converse quickly patter over to him, but he still doesn’t stop talking. “I know you probably don’t even feel the same, with Beverly and the other girls, but I felt like I had to tell you before we all,” He’s cut off when he feels hands; Bill’s hands, on his face.

He glances up, his eyes widening considerably when he sees Bill leaning down, placing his lips on Stan’s. An intake of air, and the relaxation of his muscles as the boy’s lips work against his own before Stan finally starts kissing back. He never thought he’d see this; Bill’s lips, sitting right there on his own. After that, his eyes flutter shut, and his hands rise to Bill’s cheekbones, caressing softly. The boys pull away from each other, both of their eyelids struggling to open all the way, and suddenly they’re both taken over with blushes and giggles.

“You were thinking about me all night?”

“Like a fire that’s afraid to light.” Stan nods, and Bill just smiles before kissing him again.

Like Stan said;


anonymous asked:

Hehey! Can i request a scenario for ten nct? I was thinking about the reader (also an idol from sm) competes in hit the stage and ten is a part of her dance crew? And like they have their partnered dance moments and squeeeee HAHAHAHA fluff fluff and like when she got to the finals she performed a stage just with ten? Wow that was long lol, but thanks a lott!💕

Hit the stage

Ok, I wrote this while I was really tired and it did not turn out as good as I wanted it to so I’m sorry, hope you don’t suffer too much and here it is xD



Genre: fluff I guess, it’s all over the place

Word count: 1 537

Summary: Chen is playing matchmaker…..

Who was I going to ask for help? This week’s theme for Hit the stage was love and I had no idea who my crew was supposed to be this time because I wanted someone who can dance but I also need someone that I’m comfortable enough to do this with since this is not the regular kind of theme. We would have to be very close to each other during some parts of the dance and there will probably be a lot of touching. In order to do this successfully I will have to be comfortable. I was currently sitting in my dorm room, all the others were out doing schedules I was supposed to be a part of, however since SM wanted me to do good on Hit the stage they just want me to focus on that for the time being. All of a sudden I hear a knock on the door.

“It’s open!” I call out, being too lazy to move from the sofa. The door opened and someone kicked of their shoes and entered the dorm. I looked up and was greeted by my best friend Kim Jongdae also known as EXO’s Chen. He gave me his signature cheshire smile and sat down beside me.

“What’s up?” He asked and gave me his full attention. I shrugged.

“Nothing much, just trying to think of the best dancer that I can do this week’s performance with.”

“What’s the theme?”

“You know I’m not supposed to tell you.” He pouted at me, causing me to emit a laugh.

“You could do it with me, EXO’s dancing machine.” I laughed even more at him. That’s a big reason as to why he was my best friend, he always made me laugh and there was never a dull moment with him.

“In your dreams you dinosaur.” He playfully punched me in the arm for the nickname. What can I say, he kind of looks like a dinosaur, a very cute dinosaur. “No, but I don’t know who I’m supposed to ask, I don’t want to ask someone I’ve already danced with because I want to be the one with a variety of crews but I have to be comfortable with the person for this to be good.” He looked at me a, I could see the wheels turning in his brain and suddenly his eyes lit up as if he just had an idea.

“I know exactly who you should dance with.” I looked at him suspiciously, in these kind of situations it was hard trusting the troll that was my best friend.

“And who is that?” He just shook his head and stood up, pulling me up with him.

“I’m not telling you just yet.” Now it was my time to pout. “You get your cute little but to the practice room.” He patted my bum. “And I’ll bring him there, I don’t think he’s busy right now.” There wasn’t much to do other than trust him and leave for the practice room. There I sat down and started listening through some songs that could fit the kind of dance I wanted to do. Soon enough I heard voices approaching my position and shortly after, Jongdae opened the door followed by someone who had been on the show a year before me; Ten. my eyes widened, why did it have to be him, I told Jongdae that I wanted to be comfortable, not nervous. Ten smiled at me, making me die slightly on the inside.

“Y/N-ah. This is Ten but I’m sure you already knew that. As you know he has both the experience of the show and he can make anyone feel comfortable so you’re all set. I have already explained as much as I know for him so the rest is up to you. I’ll just leave and good luck.” Before he closed the door he shot me a wink and I glared at him, he’s playing matchmaker that little shit.

“So, what’s the week’s theme?” He asked and sat down beside me. I just looked at him with a shocked look.

“Wait, are you saying you’ll do this?” He nodded.

“Of course, It’ll be nice dancing on that stage once again, and I want a chance to win, also I’ve been wanting to dance with you for a while too.” Now I was stunned, he wanted to dance with me specifically? He just grinned at me, knowing what I sentence I was stuck on. “But I need to know what the theme is.” He brought me back to reality.

“Oh, uh it’s love. They’re reusing one of the more interesting themes from last season.” His cheeks were now slightly red, I don’t think he expected that. “Do you still want to do it?”

“Of course I do, we can do this, no problem.” I laughed at how fast he was talking and pulled him down on the floor again since he had stood up in all his haste.

“I have already looked through some songs that fit the concept I want to do.”

We spent the next 30 minutes deciding on the song and the hour after that brainstorming dance moves. The feel of the song is supposed to be cute because both me and Ten can relate to that feeling and it comes naturally to the both of us. We were doing some kind of high school romance so we gathered some other people that were supposed to act as our “friends” in the performance. Ten was supposed to be the guy doing all he possibly can to get the girl, me, but she is stubborn and persistent but in the end she will accept. It will be a kind of push and pull game.

So we started practicing, making up moves as we went and in the end it turned out to be really good. After hours of dancing we were both exhausted and more than ready for sleep. We gathered our stuff and left the room.

“That was awesome, I really look forward to tomorrow.” Ten couldn’t keep the smile from his face as he talked about our dancing. The practice today may have been a bit clumsy but we still haven’t got all the parts down correctly yet. We hugged as we were about to go our separate ways to our individual dorms. I was attacked by my teammates who were trying to get some information out of me but I remained quiet and said that they’d have to wait until the show aired. Then I went to bed.

During the week we practiced harder than ever. And once it was friday Ten and I decided to practice ourselves, without the rest of the crew, for our individual parts. During one of these parts Ten was supposed to grab me by the arm as I tried to walk away and drag me into him, resulting in me wrapping one of my legs around his hips. Every time we did this my heart started racing, every time we were close enough that I could feel his breath on my face, and every time I had to calm myself down when we pulled apart and continued the dance. Another part included him carrying me around the stage, I knew there was going to be touching but this is making me feel things. I think I’m falling for him and that’s not good. Being idols complicates a lot of things, including dating. So I ignored those feelings and tried staying platonic towards him.

“You want to take a break?” Ten asked as the clock ticked closer to seven PM. I nodded and grabbed my water.bottle. “Let’s go buy some coffee or something, we’ll need to be awake if we’re going to continue.” And with that the both of us went outside in the coldness, that also helped waking us up. We were soon back, me both of us with a latte each.

“You really didn’t have to pay for me, honestly.” I said as I drank my coffee.

“Of course, what kind of guy would I be if I didn’t.” I laughed at him. “And also, I count this as a date so.” he looked at me as he drank his coffee and wiggled his eyebrows a bit. I just shook my head at him, knowing better than to contradict him. After the coffee break we practiced until one in the morning.

The next day was the day of the show and Ten and I were unfortunate to go first. We were standing backstage as the hosts talked away with the judges and the contestants.I looked at Ten, all cute in his makeup and outfit. We looked at each other as they introduced our performance and the video of our practices appeared on the big screen. Ten looked at me.

“You know, I heard somewhere that a good luck kiss actually works.” I looked at him with a shocked expression and before I knew it he cupped my face and gave me a long kiss on the lips. When he pulled away he looked at me and smiled. “Let’s do this.”

Let me just say that we won.