the shit that comes out of that kid's mouth

  • Larcade: I am here to kill you!
  • Natsu: Many have tried.
  • Larcase: I will destroy the guild!
  • Natsu: Tell me something new.
  • Larcade: I will hurt your friends.
  • Natsu: Come on, we hurt each other on purpose.
  • Larcade: Mostly that blonde girl that kept you alive.
  • Natsu: Now listen here you piece of shit, one more word out of your motherfucking mouth and I swear to the almighty lord Satan I am gonna post him a packet with your corpse in it, limp by limp so he can put it together like a fucking IKEA table. Now do you understand me or do I need to shove your head into a molten pit of iron?
  • Larcade: Sorry Uncle...
  • Zeref: *Around the corner* Are you kids behaving?
Swearing in the Zones

in the city swearing, while not a crime that can get you arrested or Worse, is very much frowned upon. you gotta constantly keep your mouth in check or else you’ll get a warning and the attention of people you’d much rather not have the attention of. too much swearing is considered an act of rebellion and will get you send to re-education.

meanwhile in the zones, no one gives a shit about what comes out of your mouth. it’s perfectly normal to hear five variations of the word fuck in an extended conversation, especially among killjoys.

it’s jarring at first for city borns but they quickly get used to it. in fact, they probably swear more than the desert borns. it’s incredibly liberating to not have to have such a tight hold over your mouth. while a desert born doesn’t put much thought into their language, to a city born every ‘fuck’ ‘shit’ and ‘damn’ is a verbal middle finger to the city and the life they left behind.

among the fab four, poison and ghoul curse the most with kobra running behind mostly because he doesn’t talk nearly as much. jet was born in the desert and so doesn’t have a need to curse as much. he would jokingly say, “you can always tell who’s a city born by how bad their mouth is.” the usual response to that is an empathetic “damn fucking straight”

As we get amped for the “My Friend Dahmer” movie due to premier soon and we’re waiting for the first trailer, I’m going to start something. I’m going to list the “Dahmers” I did during my youth/adolescence and then I will tag several other blogs to list the “Dahmers” they did.

Boy, did I do Dahmers! I did a lot of Dahmers and was cringy af

I used to have this tape recorder. I would make all of these grotesque, guttural and retarded sounds into the recorder and would play them back in slow motion. Sometimes I walked around with it tucked in my jacket outside making people wonder where those funny, yet also hideous deep noises were coming from.

I would blurt out random shit in school and laughed extremely loud.

I went to this Youth Group at my church one evening and had a fireball jawbreaker in my mouth watching some other kids play this rough game out on the floor where I think one guy tried getting on another’s back, doing these piggy-back rides(we did so many crazy games there, so it’s hard to remember them all). Well, one boy was sort of bent over in front of me and I suddenly spit out the fireball candy(it was faded to white by then lol) and with impeccable aim and distance along with it just being a lucky shot, landed straight into his butt pocket!

I remember going around the apartment complex when I was 13 and going in an outside closet where nobody was watching and would mess with the fire alarm system and test the alarms causing a brief horn to sound across that huge pond(so big, it was actually considered a man-made lake) around the apartment complex. I never was caught.

I also once went to the pool at the apartments where they also had a hot tub and next to it was a laundry mat. Somebody must have not been in their right mind by leaving a box of laundry detergent next to the hot tub. Well, I ended up taking a bunch of the soap and dumping it into the hot tub and walked away. Nobody even saw me doing it and I remember a number of people were at the pool that day. I came back 2-3 minutes later and a mountain of foam had formed over the hot tub.

@damn-dahmer @irishcreamandhalcion @dahmer-man @dahmergasm

the devils rejects sentence memes (triggering)
  • "I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work."
  • "Chinese, Japanese, Dirty knees, look at these!"
  • "What's the matter, kid?"
  • "Don't ya like clowns?"
  • "I'm gonna kill your whole fucking family."
  • "Please, mister/miss. This is insane."
  • "The next word that comes out of your mouth better be some brilliant fuckin' Mark Twain shit, 'cause it's definitely getting chiseled on your tombstone."
  • "Would you say that again?"
  • "Do you kiss your mama with that mouth?"
  • "Shoot me! Shoot me right in the ass!"
  • "What you lookin' at?"
  • "I set my standards pretty low, so I'm never disappointed."
  • "What are you gonna do? Shoot me? What did I ever really do to you?"
  • "I swear I'll do it! I'll kill you!"
  • "There ain't no bullets in this thing."
  • "What did you say about the King?"
  • "Son, if you ever say another derogatory word about Elvis Aron Presley in my presence again, I will kick the living shit out of you!"
  • "You're gonna fuckin' bleed to death!"
  • "Ooo aaah I feel it! Oh great god almighty I repent, I repent! Oh I feel the love of the god, god, god almighty! Oh the holy spirit is in my body."
  • "Stop? Bitch, I have just started."
  • "Do I stutter, bitch?"
  • "There is no fuckin' ice cream in your fuckin' future."
  • "Don't you fucking imitate me, it's fucking rude!"
  • "You know, I think I'm gonna get me some tutti fucking fruity."
  • "You're smoking dope."
  • "Kill 'em!"
  • "You ain't goin' nowhere, Bitch!"
  • "Meow meow, here pussycat."
  • "God dammit look at that jacket."
  • "Woo hoo! I feel like we're all really getting to know each other now!"
  • "Everyone loves me. Don't you pretend you don't fancy me."
  • "Killing sounds so permanent."
  • "If you want special favors you gotta give me something in return."
  • "What's that I smell? I smell RABBIT!"
  • "Oh man! I could hear that bone shatter all the way from back here!"

listen…. arguing with antis/egalitarians on here is literally pointless and exhausting because they yell all day about how the Tumblr Kids™ can’t deal with being argued with but they’re literally the same way
they won’t listen to you if you call yourself a feminist. they won’t listen to you if you support black lives matter. they won’t listen to you if you criticize religion or capitalism or racism. no matter how reasonable you try to be they still say stupid shit like “but how can you expect anything intelligent to come out of the mouth of a radical feminist”
like it’s whatever i don’t care that you’re a stubborn thick-headed mule of a person, lots of people are, just get off your goddamn soapbox about how fragile and intolerant liberals are, quit trying to pretend you’re more reasonable and open to debate, because you’re not. you just want to hear yourself talk and feel smart and enlightened that you’re not an idiot liberal like the rest of us. but you’re drinking the kool-aid too, buddy, you’re just drinking the red instead of the blue.

kidding around, pt 7

to make up for the last part, this part is short ;p

for kahn-on-tumblr

previously

Natasha is totally into the shower. She giggles high and wild when Tony blows the water out of his face after he steps into the spray. He’s careful not to get much of her wet to begin with.

Clint and Steve end up clambering out of the bath to come join them. At one point Steve starts jumping, trying to get at the shower head and Tony has to use his hard voice, which brings back some of Clint’s unease.

It’s necessary, but Tony still feels like shit for it.

Natasha gets comfortable enough to duck her head into the spray though and that’s a proud moment. Especially when she starts blowing the water away from her mouth the same way Tony had.

In the tub, Rhodey is giving all the kids new soap-dos and he’s got a soap bubble goatee that’s plainly modeled after Tony’s. He winks and Tony laughs to himself.

But the bath water eventually gets cold and they all get out, drying with towels bigger than they are. Tony and Rhodey leave them swaddled up in the towels for a minute so they can dart out into the bedroom and change out of their soaked underwear.

When they get back, Steve and Sam are both crying. Rhodey takes Steve, so Tony drops to a knee in front of Sam. “Hey, hey, what’s going on? What’s this about?”

“I w-want my m-m-mamaaa,” Sam wails and to his left Tony can hear Rhodey having infinitely less luck–Steve’s cries are totally incoherent.

“Oh,” Tony says, with as much sympathy as he can muster. “I bet. I’m sorry, buddy. Do you want a hug?”

“Uh-uh huh,” Sam chokes and gratefully crawls into Tony’s lap. He gives him a tight squeeze and then glances around at the other kids who are milling and talking amongst themselves. Rhodey’s staring at Steve and nodding along, even though Steve sounds incoherent still. Rhodey keeps attempting to comfort him and gets smacked for his trouble.

“Thor, buddy,” Tony says, leaving Rhodey to focus on the little American handful, “c'mere so I can get you into these pjs, okay?” He kisses the top of Sam’s bony little head to let him know he’s not being forgotten.

Thor comes over and lets Tony dress him, responding slowly to Tony’s requests because he’s busy staring starry-eyed at Clint who’s telling him some story about a lion that Tony can’t follow.

Clint insists on dressing himself and does a pretty good job even though he’s got his eye on Tony while he helps a shy Bruce into his.

Natasha’s wrestling into her own clothes too, so Tony takes a second to rub Sam’s back and see how he’s doing. “You all done crying? I get sad about my mom being gone too. Do you want to be sad some more or put on your jammies?”

Sam giggles a little wetly and sniffles. “Jammies,” he says softly.

“You got it.”

He looks to see how Rhodey’s doing as he collects the clothes.

“He misses his mom, too,” Rhodey says to him, and Steve, who had been allowing him to pat his shoulder, shoves his hand away and curls up into a wretched little ball. Not before catching Tony’s eye though. “I want Tony!” he yells.

“Okay,” Rhodey says patiently, “that’s fine. But he’s helping Sam get dressed right now, if you let me–”

“NO!” Steve shouts, and slaps away Rhodey’s hand.

“Hey now,” Rhodey says, voice going stern. “I know you’re upset, but that is not an excuse to be nasty!”

“Apologize,” Tony tells him.

Steve keeps blubbering until well after Tony finishes dressing Sam and has him lying quietly on his shoulder, thumb in his mouth. Then, finally, he mumbles, “’m sorry.”

“Thank you,” Rhodey says. “Now would you like Tony to help you get dressed?”

Steve nods, meek and embarrassed and Tony waves him over. He goes to set Sam down but he lets out a pitiful whining noise, so Tony sucks it up and helps Steve into his pajamas one handed, with, thankfully, an assist from Rhodey. Then he gathers both boys up and stands. They’re heavy little monsters.

“All right, it’s bedtime,” he announces.

the signs as halsey tweets

aries: “God damn right, you should me scared of me.”
taurus: “Yo calling me “fat” and “chubby” is not gonna create a force field around that pizza headed for my mouth. I like the way I look. Get bent.”
gemini: “I am honesty so exhausted I just tried to figure out what number comes between 5 and 6.”
cancer: “Just remember that your body is working super hard to digest and remind you to breath and it doesn’t really give a shit about a thigh gap.”
leo: “Fetus Justin Beiber music puts me in such a good mood oh my”
virgo: “My pee is crystal clear right now. Straight water right now. My pee could save kids in Africa right now. #overhydratedmaybe?”
libra: “nothing! a! woman! does! justifies! unwanted! sexual! attention!”
scorpio: “There’s a song on my album called “Young God” and I hope every single one of u loses your virginity to it.”
sagittarius: “I’m sorry sir u r swerving into my lane 🌀🌀🌀”
capricorn: “*sings to the tune of aladdin* I could show you all about weaves when ur hair falls out. ✨”
aquarius: “subtweet: ur not even a joke ur a pun”
pisces: “its really hard to get mad at cute people. Put your dimples away dammit.”

Short scenes from the “Angry Birds” idea:

A man out of his depth:

    Raph looked to Damian, and Jason was almost impressed with how calm the guy looked after talking to three potential angry maniacs. He gave the boy the polite smile. “And why are you here Damian?”

    Damian looked at the therapist. His lips curled back. And in that moment, Jason could tell whatever was about to come out of his mouth was gold.

    “Fuck you.”

The meet up we deserve: 

   It was in times like these that Jason could almost be happy that Damian was his brother.

    “Look kid,” Harper glared at Damian. “You might be ten, but that doesn’t mean I’m gonna let this shit slide..”

    Damian looked almost bored. “Ah yes. Intimidation. Great route to go on a child raised by Batman. I applaud you.”

    Harper leaned in closer, her scowl growing darker. “Don’t get smart.”

    “Stop being so dumb and I’ll consider it.”

And a friendship that makes so much sense:

    “I don’t even belong here,” Stephanie muttered, sinking lower into her chair. “I do not have an anger problem.”

    “You threw a rock through each of Wayne Manor’s windows and told Mr. Wayne, and I quote “he could shove them up his ass.””

    Stephanie shrugged. “Have you met Bruce Wayne? A rightful anger problem is different than an anger problem.”

    Jason decided she was his new favorite. 

Do you ever have a conversation with someone who is so pretentious, privileged, and narrow-minded that you have to wonder if you’re on Candid Camera or some shit because that stuff coming out of their mouth cannot possibly be real

3

I’ve only ever played the demo for Five Nights At Freddy’s (horror games aren’t really my thing), but the concept and lore for the game series really intrigues me - and considering the third game will eventually come out, I’d like to see how far down the rabbit hole things’ll go.

I might get around to drawing some of the other characters from the series, but for now have a quick doodle dump.

My mom keeps saying shit like “African American communities used to have more dignity” and “their entitled mentality is what’s keeping them down not lasting effects of slavery and oppression.” How can you have a mixed kid and have those words come out of your mouth. How can you be related to black people and not give a shit long enough to pick up a history book and read even the SHORTEST article on black history in the U.S.

Yes All Women
He be like respect my mom and my grandma
My mom and my grandma my everything they raised me
Daddy a ghost
A ghost one who never had the decency to grace us with his presence
Perhaps he was too much of a coward
Too much of a playboy to give a fuck
To find out if his kids’ mouths were fed
Yasss all women
He be like respect my mom & grandma
My mom & grandma they raised me
Daddy a ghost
Bitches ain’t shit
They dispensable & irreplaceable
What that mouth do ma?
When you coming through?
That ass & them titties tho?
You should save yourself for me.
I’m different
I’m not like those other guys
I’ll treat you right
Bitches ain’t shit
I ain’t shit
Why can’t u be like them white broads?
Wear those cute leggings and tank tops
Why u always gotta be so damn angry and bitter
Something’s up with you
Shits gotta change
Yo wassup with you
You switching up on me
Where you at?
What you doing?
When we gon chill?
Some of my own brothers putting us down
Putting us down for who we are naturally
Putting us down praising the other women
Praising the other women who have our features
Who have our features like items in a store jus displayed in a different showcase
Yasss all women
He be like respect my mom and my grandma
My mom and my grandma my everything they raised me
Daddy a ghost
Bitches ain’t shit
They dispensable & irreplaceable
What that mouth do ma?
When you coming through?
That ass & them titties tho?
You should save yourself for me.
I’m different
Bitches ain’t shit
I ain’t shit
Why can’t u be like them white broads?
Wear those cute leggings and tank tops
Why u always gotta be so damn angry and bitter
Something’s up with you
Shits gotta change
Yo wassup with you
You switching up on me
Where you at?
What you doing?
When we gon chill?
Yass all women