so yeah the more I think about what Earth C is like the more it horrifies me. Like, from the start:
The kids look at this fledgeling society that they have built, small and fragile, and decide “hey, this is boring. let’s skip ahead all the boring hard stuff to when these guys have REAL civilization!” Ignoring that this is still EARTH, with all of Earth’s volcanos and earthquakes and whatnot that could seriously damage a new civilization, events that they are more than capable of preventing or mitigating - this society doesn’t have NEWSPAPERS so let’s get to the good stuff.
So the kids skip out on all the hard work to get to the fun, and immediately discover that the new society has racial segregation. This is not a situation that was going to develop at last look at the society, since everyone was being raised together, so it’s likely that there was some kind of massive societal upheaval that led to everyone only living with their own race. The kind of situation that might have bene preventable had some kids been around to see this coming and try and get people to see a better way.
They are then immediately handed rulership, despite them having maybe a few semesters of high school civics combined and absolutely 0 knowledge of the histories, economics, or laws of their new domains. Also, no one points out that, hey, handing complete control to a few traumatized, immortal creator-gods who have no possible way to relate to any of their subjects might be a bad idea.
Then… Jane. Look, I like Jane, but let’s take a look at some of her actions? She immediately begins CrockerCorp again, and has record profits, presumably because literally all her competition looked at the company being run by Actual God, decided they didn’t want to commit blasphemy, and quit, or were driven out of business because no one wanted to buy from anyone who wasn’t god, because that’s probably against their religion. Then she’s elected Mayor, which gives her two different political positions, one corporate one, and one religious one, which is ground for so many conflict of interest issues.
And then today. Jane is on the moonbase, fine, Jack Noir attacks… and Jane’s solution is not to merely beat him up, which she is completely capable of doing, or fly away, which she is also capable of. Instead she takes off her accessory - her accessory she was planning on wearing to a dinner date, the one she has probably had for some time - slaps it on him, and activates its mind control capabilities. What the fuck did you make that for, Janey, and why the fuck did you wear it to dinner. She then removes the cloth dressing a wound, reopening what would be an injury that would be very quickly fatal to a human, and ties it on as a leash. A leash on another sentient being. A leash she, because of aforementioned mind control accessories, gets no practical use from. A leash that she is therefore only using because it makes her happy to and because it humiliates Jack.
She then follows that up by talking about how they haven’t been very good gods (accurate) and then saying that the people need divine supervision. Right after casually using a mind control device.
And then, she does the oven thing, and pointlessly gets one of the Felt maybe-killed. Potentially Cans could have survived, but she really had no way of knowing that. She is more than capable of making sure EVERYONE gets out of there alive, but she decided to put one of the ‘gentlemen’ in mortal danger for shits and giggles.
Our heroine! Apparently. The only hope is that Aradia and Sollux appear to chew everyone out.
I’m Leo and I’m a dazzlingly good looking once-in-a-lifetime dog who somehow, through a series of highly unfortunate circumstances, ended up a starving puppy living on the streets!!!!! #tragedy
Well, you can imagine how glad I was when a nice lady stopped her warm car and took me out of the cold and to the vet doctor, where I was all fixed up and got to eat all the food I needed. #blessed
Then my savior named me “Leo” and took me to meet nice new friends at Adopt-a-Dog in Armonk, New York. Everybuddy there fell in love with me – who could resist? I was the staff favorite, sweet and adorable to every person who met me, and VERY smart! #overachiever
But somehow the days have become months and now years – for two years I’ve been waiting, longer than any other pet in this shelter. #theremustbesomemistake
I can understand some people may not think they’re worthy of me. THIS IS NOT TRUE! You are! I can see into your heart and I know it’s full of love! #knowallseeall
My shelter friends think I should be an only pet, but maybe we can discuss this. The thing is, when you’re as amazing as me, it’s hard to see why people would want another pet! Trained, healthy, loving… gosh, I wish I could adopt myself! #justtellingitlikeitis
If you already have pets or live really far from me, maybe you could reblog me? See, I spend a lot of time dreaming of my new home, and how can people know I’m looking for them if they never see my post? #inarguable
So please, call 914-273-1674 or email email@example.com and tell them you want to meet Leo… and then just casually say, “What do you think of him?” if you want to know all about me! #onlygoodthings
<b><p></b> <b>Wampus:</b> loud, clear voices; speaking up without fear; clenched jaws; sloppy handwriting; a commanding presence; the first inhale after coming up for air while swimming; strong noses that flare when angered; staying up until 3am laughing with friends; messy buns; strength training; bitten lips; cinnamon; fishnets; muscles shifting under a lover's fingertips; powerful thighs; neon and bright colors; chiles rellenos; that moment right before the free fall on a rollercoaster; scratch marks; the sound of a knife sharpening; fruit infused water; tongues burnt on midday coffee; kisses from big dogs; hair ties breaking; unsettled dust; linking arms; backless dresses; very hot baths; rock climbing; mosh pits; Doc Martens; smudged lipstick; spicy curry; tunnel graffiti; charcoal-stained fingertips; baring teeth; caffeine addiction; wrinkled noses; gasping between passionate kisses; sharp cut creases; holographic knives; 1967 Chevy Impala; heterochromia; the snap of leather; the scent of an extinguished match; hickeys; ripped leggings; inner ear headphones; screaming at the top of your lungs; twists; the sizzle of steak hitting the grill; strobe lights; the anticipation of a bassdrop; new age tattoos; dermal anchors.<p/><b>Thunderbird:</b> tilting faces toward the sun; mountains in the distance; bright smiles; weathered and worn books; hammocks; darjeeling tea; the look of awe and wonder; smirking; wavy hair; paper airplanes; muted nail color; sunkissed highlights; aster flowers and wildflowers; recycling; legs aching from standing and/or moving too long; trailing hands over tree trunks; wide, open spaces; stargazing; hipster fashion without hipster elitism; whistling along to the music in your head; lightning bugs landing on hands; music festivals; Sailor Moon; choker necklaces; abandoned railroad tracks; making custom playlists for friends; lifted pinkies when drinking; crochet braids; space buns; dresses with pockets; morning fog; being unafraid of, or even thrilled about, getting lost; high cheekbones; petrichor; feeling breathless contemplating existence; a light sheen of sweat; septum piercings; blushing from ears to chest; schadenfreude; OTEs; power lines; burnt marshmallows; accidentally dropping food on shirts; horizontal bamboo blinds; tripping over words around attractive people; vintage suitcases; reading field journals; Long Island iced tea; maypoles; handmade flower crowns; serendipity; elote; Volkswagen vans; bathhouses; windblown hair; pastel hair; homemade granola; picking up bits and pieces of language while traveling.<p/><b>Pukwudgie:</b> herbal tea; warm, fond smiles; dimples; brown eyes; being underestimated; thick blankets; humming along to music playing in the background; journaling; macadamia nuts; the sound of cicadas; tracing hands over tall grass; tight hugs; peaches; tiny, dainty tattoos; naturally long eyelashes; muddy hemlines; elderberry wine; holding hands; jumping as high as possible on a trampoline; rain pattering on a window; succulents; crystals; terrariums; bangles; flannel shirts; tear tracks; powder-lined cat eyes; finding an onion ring in your fries; balloons; throwing autumn leaves in the air; honey bees; stickers; apple cider; crickets chirping; damp cotton; Ford Farlaines; hide and seek; an unnoticed stumble; sunlight reflected on lake water; Eskimo kisses; ice cream melting over fingers; the twitching of squirrels' tails; raw spider silk; headwraps over natural hair; tapping toes to the beat; "Christian cussing" around children; competitive sand castle building; fiercely protecting others' autonomy; bunny teeth; dulce de leche; harmonizing; grass stains; gardening; gel pens; absolutely losing it to memes; angel bite piercings; naturally pink cheeks; the countdown before taking the plunge; freshly clipped nails; rushing to aide someone having a panic attack.<p/><b>Horned Serpent:</b> narrowed eyes and pursed lips; box braids; stacks of nonfiction books; satire; forehead kisses; hands gently caressing cheeks; helvetica; a collection of partially filled notebooks; a face softening in realization; diffused light; bitten nails; eavesdropping; Earl Grey tea; fencing; the sound of the A/C kicking on; A-line dresses; freshly shaved legs against cool, clean sheets; glass ceilings; minimalist tattoos; sketchbooks; cursing when spilling coffee over your notes; plum lipstick; thick-rimmed glasses; vindication; neutral tones; smudged makeup from rubbing eyes during an all-nighter; button-up shirts; aching fingers and wrists; taking a break from a project only to realize hours have passed; Cadillac Broughams; julienne cut vegetables; fish tacos; ankle socks; being 10 minutes early; origami; spiral staircases; soft smiles watching children learn; flyaway hairs; finger-walking on metal desks; mint ice cream; having a 10 or more kill streak; pressed flowers; silhouettes; the crunch of biting into an apple; limericks; sake; Frank Sinatra; lighthearted debates that turn into yelling matches; sphinx cats; pastel hair; deadbolts; elaborate mosaics; nostril piercings; YInMn blue.<p/></p><p/></p>