Honestly, I’m fucking tired. I’m tired of ranting about abusive boyfriends in YA/NA. But I have to keep doing it because nobody seems to fucking listen or understand.
Even in books where they get “redemption arcs”, it’s still fucking abuse. Even if the girl forgives him, it’s still abuse. Even if he “had no choice” (why is this such a common fucking plot device), it’s still abuse.
Real life rarely gives abusers a “good reason”. In fact, I’d say it never gives them a “good reason”. But in fiction, y’all can point at Rhys and Warner and their ilk and go “he had no choice!” or “he did it for her best!” or “well he’s sorry and she forgave him!”
And even if that were fucking true in the universe of the book, it’s never true in real life, and dumb kids who don’t know better pick up on these messages, and when their partners start treating them like shit, they think “oh he can’t help it, he’s just damaged and he truly loves me on the inside, he’ll change if I forgive him!”
Sometimes the narrative frames the hurt they inflict on the female character as a necessary evil, and makes the female character look like a bitch for not understanding the pain the man goes through when he’s hurting her.
Why is it always on the woman to forgive the man? Why is it her job to find love in her heart and to forgive him, and not his job to not be an asshole in the first place?
Why do we even need characters who need “redemption arcs” to make up for the shit they’ve put their lover through? Why do they have such an easy time doing these things, and seem to show no remorse until it’s time for the redemption arc to reveal its perfect, shining head and we find out that DEEP DOWN INSIDE he was TRULY SUFFERING when he did those things? Why, despite supposedly loving the people they hurt, they never seem to even bother to come up with another plan, another solution, and just do as the EVIL BAD GUYS tell them to do without question?
Why why why, even when they’re being assholes and hurting the girl, they’re still written and portrayed as hot, sexy, dangerous, alluring?
Because it’s hot, isn’t it? It’s entertaining. Y’all want to see how her love will turn this monster, this poor damaged boy into someone whole and good again.
Because it’s never about the girl. Her job is to cry when he hurts her but get lost in her eyes as he smirks at her. Her job is to forgive easily and never hold a grudge, never be truly hurt, never truly experience any pain that can’t be undone with an anguished declaration of love.
He always remains desirable, even when he supposedly isn’t. He’s always hot, he just goes from dangerous hot to protect-this-precious-damaged-smol-bean hot.
Even if his actions are “justified”, even when he gets a redemption arc, even when the author and fandom bends over backwards to explain to us that HE’S ACTUALLY A GOOD PERSON, I PROMISE, I have to ask: Why?
Why do we need this? Why do you feel the need to write a character who is at first so much of a dickhead that you need to write him a redemption arc just to justify or smooth over the shit he’s done before?
Because that’s what it fucking is. These types of redemption arcs are never about redemption, they’re erasers. They’re meant to smooth over, to excuse, to explain, to forgive what he did. He never has to face the consequences of his actions, because his actions weren’t “his fault”. He never has to actively redeem himself, because he was forced to do those bad things, you see?
His redemption is never a process, never a struggle. It’s never about him acknowledging that he did something wrong and struggling to make up for it. It just happens, and he feels sad (if even that), and she forgives him, and all the shit he did in the past is forgotten because they’re in love now! It’s ok because she forgave him!
Sometimes the redemption arc is supposed to make him more sympathetic, even. Look at this poor innocent boy! He had to do bad things for plot reasons and now he’s sad about it! He’s so dangerous, but so damaged! Your love, your forgiveness, will fix him!
And fine, let’s say that he’s forced to treat her like absolute garbage, I still have to ask: Why? Why would you construct the plot in such a way? Why do you need him to do these things, these horrible things that you later have to “fix” to make their relationship alright?
I know why. Because it’s the only goddamn way you can make him interesting, isn’t it? It’s the only way you can make him sexy and mysterious.
This seems to be the fucking guide the people who write this shit follow:
Step 1: Construct the plot in such a way that he’s “forced” to do terrible shit to the protag.
Step 2: Write him as alluring despite the terrible shit he does, because that makes him hot and mysteriour and dangerous.
Step 3: Construct a cheap redemption arc, if even that, to make him seem more sympathetic and tug at the reader’s and the protag’s heartstrings. This is what will excuse or even undo his abuse, provided it’s acknowledged as a mistake he made at all.
Step 4: Make sure the protag forgives him despite all the shit he’s done.
Step 5: They’re in love forever and she’s not at all scarred or feels any lingering pain or hatred for what he did, because that would make her an evil selfish bitch who just doesn’t understand what he went through!
Can’t you write interesting male love interests without making them into assholes? Can’t you write morally grey, mysterious male love interests without having them beat the shit out of the supposed love of their life?
If you think that this dynamic is what makes a relationship interesting, then I’m sorry to say but you’re either a terrible writer or you have deeply questonable taste.
Chanyeol’s self composed song ‘’Heaven’’ lyrics (Analysis)
So, this is my first post & the first analysis in tumblr (since I had a lot in twitter lol).
Anyways, this is based on my own opinion, accept it or not; it’s your decison.
Let me start from the beggining.
Chanyeol once asked a queston ‘’If you could describe Baekhyun with one word, what would it be?’’
He answered ‘’SKY’’.
Since 2014, when Chanyeol started using Instagram, he often started posting pictures of sky as well and he still posts them, till now. Let’s see.
Now, I’d like to show you something from Baekhyun’s account.
This pic. As we all can see, the caption is a cloud, which a certain person (and not only him) uses when posting a pic of SKY. But this is just a selfie and obviously it’s not related to the sky. Baekhyun doesn’t wear any blue thing or etc that might be related to a cloud, yet the caption says it all.
Chanyeol puts different captions while posting sky pics. Such as ‘’Beautiful’’. But also, he puts clouds.
In conclusion, we can guess, since Chanyeol thinks the sky resembles Baekhyun, he was actually the one who posted Baekhyun’s selfie with such caption. Usually Baekhyun rarely posts anything. When he does, he always puts some long captions, thankses fans and so on. But here we see a single cloud which, I do repeat, doesn’t really relate to the post.
Of course, it might be a coincidence but as they say ‘’Coincidence isn’t a coincidence at all’’. Haha, anyways, you may have your own opinion about this posts.
NOW, let’s go the the main topic, since we all, I think, realized the word ‘’Sky’’ for Chanyeol is related to Baekhyun.
‘’Heaven’’ is a song composed by Chanyeol (!! only the lyrics !!)
Now, let’s start analyzing what’s behind the lyrics~
‘’Hello angel, you’re like a painting
You’re all I see when I look to the skies…’’
These two sentences are quite simple, I think. The author (Chanyeol) as we see, talks about his beloved one and tells us that he sees his beloved one when he looks to the skies. The beloved one is related to the sky.
‘’City street lights, even if the lights go out
And the moon disappears, It’s bright because
I have a star that fell from the skies
And it’s you…’’
As we see, he keeps repeating the word ‘’light’’ several times. He compares his beloved one with lights as that one, he claims, is brighter than all the street lights.
Lights, lights lights… Would it be safe to remind Baekhyun’s power is exactly the LIGHT. Not only that, but also the fact that he’s the light, the brightest member of the group, and as EXO claims he keeps them as one.
‘’Even the brightest jewel in heaven
For sure couldn’t be brighter than you
Don’t drift away from me
Baby won’t you stay
I’ll love only you forever..’’
Quite interesting that Chanyeol keeps talking about lights and brightness. Indeed, the beloved one is brighter than any jewel :)
‘’I keep laughing for some reason every night
Even when I close my eyes, I can’t sleep
I spend the entire night with thoughts of you
Your sparlking smile lets me breathe..’’
I really should mention, that besides any romantic relationship, Chanyeol and Baekhyun are besties. People say ‘’The best relationship is when you both can be lovers and best friends at the same time.’’
Chanyeol’s stans and Chanyeol himself admitted it. During the concerts, awarding events and so on, we see they’re all over each other, smiling and laughing at jokes only both of them understand. So I guess, we can bravely relate the first sentence to this, because no matter anything Chanyeol laughs most when he’s with Baekhyun and at anything that Baekhyun does.
The following sentences are very intimate as well. Some people might misunderstand it and say ‘’It can’t be about Baekhyun, because they’re groupmates and they’re always together.’’
Nope, they’re not. All of them have different schedules and they spend quite a little time together. The facts say it; for example in their last interview for VIVI Magazine 2016 Chanyeol said ‘’We chat together till we both forget about time’’ . (almost as sweet as the lyrics to be honest haha).
Your sparkling smile lets me breathe..’’
Well, quite common for Chanyeol because since 2012 he mentioned his ideal type is someone who smiles a lot.
I don’t even know someone who smiles more than Baekhyun. It’s my opinion, maybe yours differs? Haha, anyways, the sparkling smile
The part about wings is SO interesting. Today (10.12.16) Baekhyun said he was an angel in his past life, his wings disappeared when he came to the human’s world, but there’s still left. He also demonstrated. Lets see.
So there we see, only Chanyeol knows what’s Baekhyun actually doing. He even asked Baekhyun to kneel and turn around so that people would see his ‘’wings’’ better from behind.
Baekhyun isn’t really fond of complimenting himself. So I guess, someone actually gave him the idea of him being an angel and having wings behind back.
Did Chanyeol discover those wings himself? As he says in the song, he’s sure, his beloved one ‘’hides wings behind back’’. Hm, who knows.
Chanyeol keeps talking about skies and skies and skies…
‘’The sky gave you everything And this world gave me you I want to keep you by my side So you can’t fly back into the sky Hold you down, keep you with me Hug you…’’
As we keep reading the lyrics, we can be sure that It’s impossible to write such heartwarming lyrics If you’re not in love.
Chanyeol about the lyrics said himself ‘’I’ve written the song as If I was really in love’’
The next sentences that I’m gonna talk about are very veryyyy important, at least to me. In my opinion, they’re the key of the song.
‘’She says, easily, so easily
To not jokingly call her so pretty..’’
Many people keep saying Chanyeol used the pronoun ‘’she’’ as he describes his beloved one, so It can’t be related to Baekhyun.
Let me tell you, it proves absolutely NOTHING. Chanyeol is an artist, he’s an idol who has responsibility over his members, over his fans. He has an image and no matter what he must keep that image. It would be totally thoughtless if he did put ‘’he’’. There would be rumors, articles that media sites post every day, and of course hundreds of people that would be ready to judge him and question his sexuality. Chanyeol is one of the idols that gets criticized even when he does nothing. It would put his career on risk if he did really put not she, but he. We all know Chanyeol apologizes for everything, he cherishes his fans too much to be that free in his actions.
As a proof to my words, I’ll tell you an example of Western artist, a singer Darren Hayes. He, in 2006, got married to his boyfriend.
In past, before admitting to be in a relationsip with a guy, Darren sang songs that included pronouns ‘’she’’ too. Such as ‘’Insatiable’’. (You may check the lyrics yourself to get sure).
I have more examples but lets not waste time.
To think, he was afraid that public would judge him, so he kept his relationship in secret. Even while living in such democratic and free country as the USA.. Considering South Korea, where homosexuality is judged way too hard, its totally normal Chanyeol is trying to ‘’stay safe in shade’’ too.
So, as we see, those pronounces prove nothing.
Anyways, the lyrics
The word that caught my attention was ‘’jokingly’’.
To be honest, if we analyze, it’s impossible to call a girl pretty jokingly. I mean, a guy compliments a girl by calling her pretty and there’s no way for it to be a joke. You call her pretty to make her happy, to make her smile and I don’t think any girl would stop it. Jokingly call a girl pretty would be even offensive because (‘’You’re pretty. Lol no, never mind I’m just kidding’’) ??? Nonsense.
But the author (our Chanyeolie) says
‘’She says to not jokingly call her so pretty..’’
Does not make any sense right? Now let’s change the pronounces.
‘’He says to not jokingly call him so pretty..’’
See? :) Now, it makes sense.
Korean guys, especially idols, have a bit feminine features of face. So usually their fans or friends call them not handsome, but pretty.
I think there’s no need to remind that most of Baekhyun stans (and one of them is me) call him pretty most of the time because he has cute, feminine side. He can be manly, but the cute side, of course, overwhelms.
All EXO members call him cute and pretty, you can rarely see them call Baekhyun ‘’handsome’’. Chanyeol calls him pretty most of all. Me, a fan since 2012, never noticed him to call Baekhyun ‘’handsome’’.
The key is, Baekhyun always stops them when they call him pretty. Even when his fans call him pretty, he asks to not to.
Between guys, it’s such a joke. They tease each other by calling pretty or beautiful. And as we see in this song, Chanyeol teases his beloved one and calls pretty while that one asks to not to. You can relate, I think.
An important thing that should be mentioned I think is also the fact that during the interview for their EX’ACT Album, Baekhyun was asked a question.
‘’Which lyrics do you like best out of all the songs’ lyrics in this album?’’
And as we see out of ALL THE SONGS Baekhyun chose exactly Heaven and exactly those lyrics :)
His explainations looks so weird to me as well lol.
Another thing. Here is ‘’Heaven’’ line distribution (credits to cyhun9461)
As we see, the one who actually sang most is no one else, but Baekhyun.
44.4% of the song lines are Baekhyun’s. Jongdae, Kyungsoo are in vocal line too but their lines are only 27.6% & 29.5%.
Even Chanyeol, who actually composed the song, has 36.8%.
Thank you, if you have read this. I did put a lot of efforts in this article and I hope you all will like it. As I said before, the article is based on my own opinion, which might be different from yours. So yeah, thanks again :)
Hey! I'm doing a pt.2 of my yandere playlist and I wanted to know if you can help me with some songs! Thanks and bye! I love your blog btw 💋🌼💞💗🌈
I’m so happy that somebody asked this queston, because I’ve already collected some songs, I just keep waiting for the perfect time, and now it’s finally here. Most of them are from my blog’s playlist, but there are a few new ones too <3
Simon Curtis - Super Psycho Love
Porcelain Black - Pretty Little Psycho
Ghost Town - Creepy Girls
Panic at the Disco - Miss Jackson
Nightcore - Smoke and Mirrors
Set It Off - Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing (Nightcore version)
Iggy Azalea - Black Widow (Rogue Remix)
Kesha - Cannibal
Lana Del Rey - Serial Killer
The Pierces - Got a Secret
Halestorm - Mz Hyde
Cady Groves - This Little Girl (Nightcore Version)
Bebe Rexha - I’m Gonna Show You Crazy
Rex - Heart of Witch
Breathe Carolina - Get Off Easy
Nightcore - You Can’t Hide From Us
Afi - Miss Murder
Melanie Martinez - Mad Hatter
Hatsune Miku - Saw and Pendulum (Vocaloid)
Skillet - Monster
Cult To Follow - Murder Melody (Nightcore version)
Drabble scenario with (Seventeen) Jihoon (Woozi) feat. other members
7&11: “Why on earth do you think I’m pretty?” & “TURN AROUND YOU IDIOT, I’M NAKED!”
Jihoon was not the cute type, his physical appearance just made him seem like it. He wasn’t clumsy, but everytime you walked in the room he became the clumsiest person on earth. He didn’t even notice it, he had you always on his mind. Everytime when he saw you he would think that you’re the prettiest person in the whole universe. He stared you a lot and he didn’t even notice. He blushed when you did something cute, or even touched him, because it felt like heaven to him. Everything about you was amazing to him and he felt so small (mentally lmao) everytime he saw you. He felt worthless next to you, this amazing person that he adored.
It was pretty obvious. He had a crush on you.
His members would tease him and you started to notice that too. They would poke and whisper something to him everytime you came in and when you asked they were like “Ohhh nothing~” and dissapear.
Jihoon was such a sweet guy. You know he didn’t like to show it, but he acually was. He couldn’t hide it.
You were watching them practicing, that was your favorite thing ever. You were so close with everyone from seventeen. Everytime they put on a song you would watch them and do the fanchants all by yourself and see who would brake and start laughing or smiling. You would yell random things that made them mix the dance moves and you would even practice random play dance together for weekly idol. They loved when you tried to dance to their songs and the room would be filled with laugh and randomness.
You loved all of them, but the closest to you was Jihoon. He was the small guy. Looked like a fluffball, acually a deadly sword that was ready to attack and kill.
They got the dance routine done, (finally) and you clapped like crazy after.
“AYY MY BOYS, YOU DID SO WELL! I’M SO PROUD!”
“Proud mom right there”, Chan commented.
“I thought I was the mom?” Jeonghan said to you.
“Wait I’m totally the mom”, Joshua jumped in.
“No you’re the “eat your vegetables and read the bible”- dad”, you said to him.
“I’M THE DAD!” Seungcheol commented.
“Ugh whatever you say”, you walked to get the water bottle and threw it at Wonwoo.
“TAKE THIS holy WATER, you look like you’re dying.”
“Well thank you, but you gotta stop throwing bottles at me.”
“Hey Jihoon!” You walked to your best friend and every pair of eyes were now on you and him. “Do you have an extra shirt? I’m sweating like a pig and I look ugly in this one.”
“I think you always look pretty”, Jihoon said, not even thinking about it and then everyone went crazy. The members started to jump around and yelling things like: “ THAT WAS SMOOTH”, “WAY TO GO HYUNG!” and “FINALLY COMPLIMENTS! GET MARRIED ALREADY!”
Jihoon had froze and so did you. Then everyone was silent again so that they could hear what he would say next.
“I mean like- I don’t want to sound weird-”
“Why on earth do you think I’m pretty?” You said before he could say anything and the members were dying in the backround. They hardcore shipped you two.
“Well uuh- you just are?” He said, playing it safe.
“Thanks Jihoon. I think I’m gonna go dress up now”, you left the room and when you closed the door you heard the screaming again. You rolled your eyes, they were so childish.
You got to the dressing room and took of your shirt smelling the sweat. You needed a shower ASAP and after you came from there you saw Jihoon staring, his face more than shook seing you, wearing nothing.
“TURN AROUND YOU IDIOT, I’M NAKED!”
He turned around fast. “I’M SORRY Y/N! I DIDN’T KNOW YOU WERE IN THE SHOWER IT WAS AN ACCIDENT I SWEAR I’M NOT A PERVERT!”
You were so embarassed, but also wanted to laugh at him being so polite and saying sorry because it was an honest mistake. His reaction was just funny.
“Uhh… apology accepted…”
The others fast ran in the room and you had not gotten your shirt on yet. You were in your jeans and bra “OH MY GOD GUYS LEARN HOW TO KNOCK!”
“WHAT WERE YOU TWO DOING?” Seungkwan questoned.
“I was taking a shower and dressing up WHAT DID YOU THINK?” You put the shirt on.
“Yeah right you were.”
“Yeah right we were.”
“WHAT WOULD TWO PRESONS WHO LIKE EACH OTHER DO IN A ROOM TOGETHER?” Seokmin shouted.
“Wait what you like me?” You said and you froze again.
“Well that’s good because I like you too.”
Ahh sorry for the typos, I really tried ♡ Thanks for reading!
I was wondering... What would each of them think about bidet? Who would use it? (is the queston structured well? Lol sorry)
Oh my god how do you come up with these wtf?!
Mikasa: would think it’s useful Reiner: Jokes about finally something being Levi’s height Bertholdt: Would like to not do a statement on this Annie: It’s weird, no Eren: Thinks it’s cool Jean: What the fuck is this?! Marco: Cool :), uses it Sasha: Isn’t this a bit unnecessary? Connie: But why? Historia: Finally they can all clean their gross asses Armin: Appreciates it Ymir: ?!
Levi: Loves it Hanji: Whaaat? Erwin: Good! Nanaba: It’s nice :) Mike: Uncomfy, no Moblit: :/
Hey! So obviously everyone loved the episode last night - there was just so much destiel feels in there it's enough to fill up an entire football stadium. BUT I keep thinking that the writers might be trying to set Cas and Kelly up, because you know, it's supernatural, and I just feel like the possibility of destiel going canon is too good to be true. I mean, Kelly is great, but it would be the worst romance ever - weird and force and kinda cringey. Maybe I'm paranoid, idk. What do you think?
(via @anon) Idk if i like where this story is going… i dont want to see cas kelly baby stories and him raising the child :/ i want cas with the brothers :(
Hi - I’m squishing these two asks together, hope you guys see it. :)
The Nephilim: what’s next?
Look, the thing is - maybe the Nephilim will die in the finale, or maybe he’ll be the Big Thing in S13 - we still don’t know. What we do know, on the other hand, is that it would be very hard to work him into the story in a way that’ll keep Cas away from Sam and Dean. Like, you know - from a narrative point of view, what do you do with this thing?
Option 1 It’s born and it grows at a normal human rate. If this happens, the Nephilim will have no place whatsoever in the show, because babies are both hard to work with and boring boring boring, and as much as we, the demented viewers, want to see Dean and Cas making nonsense noises and cooing at this second Antichrist, it’s not going to happen. If this is where they’re going, we’ll have a Jesse situation: the Nephilim will be carted off to live with some other hunter (not Cas, because Cas is one of the main characters and is needed elsewhere), and we’ll never hear from him again.
Option 2 It’s born and grows Amara-style, turning from adorable creepy baby who moves stuff with his mind to overly attractive teenager who winks at Dean and makes him uncomfortable. I hope they’ll avoid this narrative, because we’ve seen the exact same thing last year, but if they do something like that -
Option 2a If the Nephilim is a bad guy, he’ll probably become S13′s Big Baddie, and Cas will have no reason to stick with him, so we’ll have the usual ‘only you can break me free from this mind control spell but nobody knows why’ trope and TFW will spend the rest of the season staring gloomily into space and wondering how to kill a semi-god, again.
Option 2b If the Nephilim is a good guy, he’s gone. There is simply no way they can keep around an allpowerful and benign deity without having massive problems. This is why they keep hurting Cas, remember?, because if Cas had his wings and his courage and his cold logic and his angelic self-confidence, Sam and Dean could spend their days playing beer pong in the Bunker. Cas would simply teleport himself wherever a monster has been spotted, look around with his x-ray vision, and then lift a finger and make a whole abandoned neighbourhood explode. And that’s it. So, well - like they did with Jesse, and even with Amara and Chuck - if this new kid is a Good Person, he’ll probably wander off on his own.
Option 2c If the Nephilim is a Gabriel-like morally grey trickster, it’s likely the Winchesters will still vote to hunt him down and kill him. They did it to Gabriel, after all, and if he hadn’t died (*wails forever*) in the war against Lucifer, I’m sure Sam, at the very least, would have gone after him. Tricksters work fine, or more than fine, as characters, but you don’t want one living in the same reality as you. Look at the messes Loki manages to whip up every couple of weeks - nope, if something is too powerful and you can’t understand how they think and feel, unfortunately the best option is to take them out. Better to be safe than sorry.
It’s still possible, at this point, that something happens and the Nephilim dies, likely with Kelly. This would make sense for a number of reasons, including that everyone except Cas, Lucifer and Kelly really wants this thing gone. The Host is gunning for him, Crowley would surely prefer he died, the BMoL (if they knew about him) would probably launch a nuclear grenade wherever Kelly is and to hell with ‘collateral damage’, and even Sam and Dean - they want to be normal and kind, but they might have no other choice, and if it comes to that, they know they must at least try to kill this child, because, yeah, NOT A CHILD, PEOPLE, and look at what happened with Amara. So maybe it’s not the Nephilim’s life that’s the big plot of next season, but his death and how it happens. We know we’re headed for some massive family conflict, and, in this sense, what’s going on with Cas is part of that. It’s those old what’s right and wrong, who’s your family, who do you trust questions Supernatural likes to throw at us, but, as we’ve seen in the past, whatever happens the endgame is what Dean just told us to our faces - him, Sam, and Cas working together, Team Free Will, because they’re better together and they’re family and that’s not gonna change, demonic baby or no demonic baby. So don’t worry too much - Cas won’t stay away for long.
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Alec and Lydia looked at each other waiting
for the Silent Brother to continue so they could move on to the next part of
the ceremony. Just as they were about to start a bang can into the room along
with the white doors flying open. There stood two shadowhunters.
“What is this matter?” Maryse said angry as
she walked down to the two. “We are in the middle of a wedding” You could tell
from her face that she was furious but you were here on misson
“The Clave sent us about attack that has
happened, You, Robert Lightwood and Lydia Brenwell are needed immediately.”
Your cousin Julian told her.
“Can’t it wait! Attacks always happen.”
“But not by Valentine” You said. Maryse
looked back at her husband then to a Lydia then back at you two. Her husband
started to walk down the aisle towards you guys while Lydia turned to face
“I’m sorry but we will need to finish this
later everyone, as part of The Clave I need to be there. Please you are all
welcome to leave “ She told everyone but then you pipe in.
“That won’t happen”
“Why not” Maryse asked.
“The Clave message was to get you three and
then keep the others here on watch.” You told her. “So sorry but everyone will
“Who watching them?” Robert asked.
“Y/N will, we need to get going now!”
Julian said. The three of them passed you and follow Julian out of the door.
You closed the door behind them standing in front of the door guarding it.
“Who’s the girl?” I asked Izzy. Isabelle
seen to be worried about something and just wave my question off as she kept
staring at the girl.
“Izzy” I said once again as I shook her
shoulder hoping then she would answer. She turned to look at me.
“Sorry I was just thinking about how Alec
must be feeling” she said
“Well I don’t say he fine his wedding just
got crashed but-“ I went to speak but Izzy cut me off.
“That’s not it. To answer your queston that
girl there is Y/N she is Alec’s ex-girlfriend.” I stared at her in shocked.
“They didn’t end off well so her coming here isn’t great” Izzy said turning
around to walked up to her brother but before she got the chance Alec was
already on his way down aisle yelling at the girl.
“You just had to come ruined my wedding
didn’t you Y/N” Alec yelled as he made his way toward you.
“Please, I better things to be at then try
and ruined your life” You said. “I’m here for The Clave not you, Get over
“Get over myself? You just crashed your
“Alec would you stop, you have no idea why
your parents and wife just ran off. But I do so shut up and leave me alone.”
“She not my wife yet thanks to someone” He
said to you while he rolled his eyes. Well it was nice to see things don’t
change Alec still rolled his eyes at everything.
“Please, you don’t even love her it’s
arranged marriage” you said crossing your arms not losing your stand. Alec step
back in shocked. You weren’t suppose to know that he thought no one was.
“How do you know that?” He asked
“Please I work for The Clave I know
everything.” You told him. “Now stand back before I tell everyone your little
“You wouldn’t” Alec said getting closer.
“GUYS DID YOU KNO-“ That’s all you could yell
before Alec slapped his hand over your mouth. You did the first thing that came
to mind and bited his hand.
“Bitch’” he said as he pulled his hand away
from your mouth.
“Nice to see your feeling haven’t changed
for me” You said with a smile.You could see Jace and Isabelle walking toward
you guys with two other people following behind.
“Nice of you to join the party” You said as
they got close.
“Why did they have to leave?” Jace asked
you with a confuse look.
‘Thanks for the hello, like Lydia said
something for The Clave”
“That something would be the attack you
mention.” The redheaded girl said. You figuerd it was that girl Clary that had
been causeing trouble here.
“That’s correct young one”
“Who did the attack” Alec asked.
“Like I would tell you”
“Y/N” It was Isabelle that said your name.
You looked at her. The girl you used to call your best friend was standng in
front of you and you have no idea who she was anymore. The one thing you knew
was that you couldn’t lied to her, she always saw right through you.
“Please tell us, for me”
“It was Valentine, but you can’t say
anything” You told them all. “I’m here to watch everyone”
“Why?” Jace asked.
“So we won’t get attack obviously” Clary
“That’s not it is it Y/N?” Jace questioned
“No it’s not, but that’s the one thing I
can’t tell you.” You told them. “So could you all please go calm your friends
so I can do my job” They all left to go calm others but Alec stayed behind.
“There’s a trailor here isnt there?” Alec
questioned. You thought for a moment should you tell him? After all he is Alec
but before you had a chance to speak Alec spoke again. “I’m over 18 remember, I
can know these things’
“There’s one, The Clave isn’t sure yet who
but they know it’s someone in this room.” You told him as both of your guys
eyes scanned the room looking for anything out of the ordinary.
“How did you end up working for them” Alec
“If you mean The Clave I’m not really
working for them, we are only doing this mission. They needed people that they
could trust and we just happened to be it.” You said. “I’m sorry about ruining
your wedding, if I had known I would of said no”
“Yeah I know you would of Y/N. It just made
me mad to see you here at my wedding, I always thought if I was going to be
married if would have been to you” Alec said not daring to look at you.
“I always did too” You told him. If had
been so long since you last saw him all you wanted to do was fall into his arms
but you knew you couldn’t do that anymore. It ending badly with Alec a lot of
anger and hate but in this moment it seem to all fade away.
“I wish I
could hate you.” Alec whisper.
“I wish I
could hate you too” you said. What happened next was unexpected you both turned
and hugged each other. How did two people that love each other become such strangers
to one another. In that moment all you could think was a thank you to The Clave
because maybe things would be alright even with this war ongoing.
She flinched when he reached out to push her hair back from her forehead, feeling shame creep up her neck the second her body reacted this instinctively, caving in like a house of cards. She hadn’t meant to pull away, not consciously, not so violently that he noticed. Pain flashed in his eyes. It was something that kept happening and was completely out of her hands, like every part of her body knew to withdraw at his touch, even though her brain, her rationality, told her not to. And she shouldn’t have, because her brain also told her that he was where she felt safe, that he was home.
“What is it?” He was careful, afraid that she wouldn’t want to talk about it, that she would grab her coat and walk out the door without explanation like she so often did when she got upset. Her mind was pure chaos, her head was throbbing painfully. The urge to leave, to run from the situation, made her legs itch and her heart pound faster.
“I-” The words wouldn’t come. She’d never voiced them, never said what fear had been buried inside her for so long. The right to know was his, as was the attempt to finally understand her. So she spoke.
“I feel so incredibly selfish.” It wasn’t what he’d expected at all, she could see that. His brown eyes were wide, his gaze questoning. “I need time. I always need a lot of fucking time to let someone in.”
“I know that.”
“I’ve been hurt in the past.”
“But I know it doesn’t give me an excuse to act like I do. To run from you when things get hard or when you get too close and to be so goddamn unapproachable. Everyone’s been hurt before, everyone’s heart’s been broken at least once and I feel so egoistic to wrap myself in my sadness and use it as an excuse when it’s not.” He waited for her to nod when he reached out again and when she allowed his touch, his fingers entwined with hers. She exhaled with a deep sigh.
“I just don’t think it’s fair of me to always say I’ve been hurt when others have it worse. I don’t think you should be the one that has to endure my moods.”
“But I love you. You’re scared and that’s okay. We have all the time in the world if you want to take things slow. Besides, what does it matter that other people have it worse, as you said? You have the right to remember and to cry and to complain. You have the right to take your time to heal. There is no shame in admitting that you don’t feel ready to open up again.” She glanced up at him with teary eyes and squeezed his hand.
“The pain we feel doesn’t get better or worse if we compare it to other people’s pain, remember that.”
okay first of all? thank you so much. second of all? i am STILL working through my 900 follower moodboard but here i fuckin am. i decided to do something different this time. i want to have my top fifty ships as voted by my followers! so i need y’all to vote lmao. to bribe you to do that, i have for you name aesthetics, make me chose edit, or blogrates! here are the rules:
rules: -mbf trashbag extraordinaire -reblog this post, likes are just bookmarks -go to this link and pick AT LEAST ten ships (please let me know if the link doesn’t work) -vote as many times as you want! -at the end, enter ur url -for a name aesthetic, put ur name and favorite color -for a make me choose edit, put two things to choose between -for a blograte, send me an ask telling me three ships you put -feel free to put all three xx -maybe check out my creations? (not a requirement)
please please please reblog this y’all i don’t want it to flop!!
I can’t help but imagine that, when Timothy met Krory for the first time, Krory was coming back of a mission and he still had his innocence activated.
And Timothy kinda got scared of him at first. And at the same time, he was fascinated because wow, the Order has vampires, Komui isn’t as lame as I thought
And eventually Timothy starts to follow Krory around because /that’s an actual vampire dude/ and he’s so curious, but then each time Krory turns around he hides because /that’s a vampire dude/.
Until he finally gets an official meeting with Krory where he doesn’t have his innocence on, and Timothy gets really surprised because Krory is so sweet and shy and there’s no way that’s the guy I saw the other day
So he would start to follow Krory around but this time he won’t hide when Krory turns around and Timothy gets really curious because this is so cool and it is really exciting. And Krory is really sweet with him so Timothy starts to stuck around and he starts to ask a lot of queston about what it is to be a vampire and all. Krory awkwardly explains to him that it’s his innocence and he’s not actually a vampire and he doesn’t like to be called a vampire which Timothy understands completely (because he himself wouldn’t like to be called an akuma just because he can possess them). He’s a bit disappointed that there’s no actual vampire but Krory makes light of the situation and even if he’s awkward it kinda cheers Timothy up.
Eventually Timothy comes to the conclusion that in the end, Komui is still lame. Krory is not though.
I need more Timothy and Krory’s friendship headcanons