the psychotic biotic

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You can fight like Yeager, fly like Ackerman but you’ll never be better than Commander Erwin

Mass Effect AU with Shepard!Erwin, the legendary commander and Jack!Levi, the psychotic biotic.
Krogan warrior Mike, Asari huntress Nana and Salarian scientist Hange are implied.

Confession:  I just finished replaying Jack’s loyalty mission, and in the middle of it, I realized that Jack was being conditioned into becoming a sociopath: Electrocuted when hesitating to kill, injected with drugs when she does kill. She never chose to become the way she is. She was conditioned into it. That makes me hate Cerberus even more and have a new appreciation for our psychotic biotic. In her honour, next time I use Incinerate with my Infiltrator, I’ll yell “I WILL DESTROY YOU!!”.

You know what I need? A new Mass Effect DLC where someone In Game is making a movie about Shepard and the crew.

No Listen, like it starts with Hackett calling Shepard up and just like “listen, idfk how they talked me into this but its an order now” and so now there is an actor living with you on the Normandy who is there to study you for “””research”””  and they just follow you around literally EVERYWHERE like they become a non-negotiable extra squadmate even on the ship

But thing is the producers are trying to “put a new spin on it” so Shepard is gender swappedNO LISTEN

So Commander Jane Shepard now has to deal with this guy who looks like his last gig was “Scary Russian Gangster # 3″ but he is actually this giant adorable nerd who is hilarious and just so excited to be here and meet you all holy shitt–

Or Commander John Shepard now has this sarcastic red head who does her own stunts and you are pretty sure she already knows more about your crew than you do and she’s only been here like ten minutes

Either way the crew finds this hilarious and starts addressing the actor as The Commander and giving them their reports and acting so shocked when they realize they got you two confused again!

But then. the movie comes out (like, after you do a bunch of missions)

And its so bad but thats what makes it great

I am talking Ember Island Players level of theatrical portrayal here.

There’s Varrus Kragarian, Rogue C-Sec officer who Doesn’t Play by the Rules [TM] and reminds you of this every time he’s on screen.

The Spunky and Brilliant Quarian hacker kid who’s constantly spouting techno-babel and pulling impossible feats (meanwhile Tali is throwing her popcorn at the screen and ranting how you can’t even do that with an omni tool do yoUR RESEARCH)

Subject-Alpha, the tattooed Psychotic Biotic who looks like he was a krogan in a past life and Jack is loving every minute of his hulk-smashing biotic destruction.

Your old friend, the actor, now shining as Commander Marshall, has taken their delivery of “I *should* go” to a whole new art form.

And afterwards, as the credits roll, you see a name, the crowning Gem of this whole existential ordeal that will haunt your dreams and nightmares alike:

Executive Producer, Conrad Verner.

Time Will Tell

Shepard leaned heavily on the railing. She felt as though her mind was being ripped apart from the inside and she couldn’t seem to focus. Her gaze drifted around the war room slowly, registering small bits of information flashing on screens and displays as her eyes passed them by. So many worlds were falling or already lost. The Normandy was one of the few glimmers of hope that the many people of the galaxy had anymore. Anderson and Hackett had reminded her of that fact many times. But were they doing enough? Had they uncovered everything that they possibly could? Was there more to this weapon of mass destruction they were attempting to build? How, exactly, would they go about using it?

She sighed and cast her gaze at the ground, pressing her weight almost entirely on her arms because her knees felt as though they were going to buckle at any moment. It was simply too much. Too much for one ship, too much for one crew, too much for one commander to manage.

That moment of utter despair caused her to miss the approach of a friendly face. She’d barely noticed when a small bar, wrapped in familiar packaging crossed her line of sight. Liara offered a snack with a sheepish smile, knowing that the commander had forgotten to eat. Again.

“Thanks,” Shepard quietly said as she accepted the rations.

“It’s a challenge to find you these days and make sure you’re taking care of yourself,” Liara responded.

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Random thought about Mass Effect.

With the Mass Effect romances, there’s always one that I felt sticks out from the others as kind of an “outlier” just as far as how it functions in the narrative. Most of the romances give you a little bit of additional insight into the character who is Shepard’s partner, plus the, you know, love scenes. The romance that deviates from this pattern is Jack in Mass Effect 2, and that’s because you don’t just get a “little bit” of extra insight into her character—I’d say literally half of her backstory and development is effectively locked behind a “romance paywall” (for lack of better words) meaning that if you’re playing as MShep and choose to romance somebody other than Jack, or if you’re playing as FShep at all, half of her character development and backstory is just completely inaccessible in-game. 

I always found it odd that the character who has apparently been used for sex so many times in the past, and who is most desperate to be valued beyond how people use her (as a weapon and/or sex object), is effectively shorted for character development if Shepard doesn’t pursue a relationship with her.

Just thoughts.