the playing cards

Santas Elves

Context: a one off for a holiday, simple and quick before the regular game. It was Christmas, me and my team were santa’s elves and we had to rescue him from a kidnapping. We were given 3 Christmas wishes yet, which we could summon anything we could imagine with. After trying to break into this castle, using a few wishes up (like a huge ladder to reach a window, and one person made a grenade), we finally find ourselves looking from above to see a room full of soldiers, except the soldiers are playing cards, and there’s a queen commanding this army.

Elf 1: I want to use a Christmas wish.

DM: This is your last one, what would you like to attempt to do?

Elf 1: I want to make 10,000 swords floating above the entire room, pointing down, and I want to drop them on the playing cards.

Elf 2: what the hell man??

DM: …you can certainly try

Elf 1: *rolls natural 20*

I thought I should mention these Night Sky cards I got as a Christmas gift. It’s simply a deck of 54 constellations (the 52 suit cards + 2 jokers) organized by season. ♡ = spring, ◇ = winter, ♧ = fall, ♤ = summer. I don’t read with it, but I feel like it could make a nifty oracle for any witches or diviners who include stars, space, or the night sky in their practice. Anyone who works with the zodiac or Greek mythology might also be interested. 

Exaltation

Hi guys! I posted a new fic on AO3

Here’s chapter 1:

Oliver was fiddling with the bible in his hand, watching the second hand on the clock as it slowly made its way to 7 pm. Each minute that passed was another minute closer to youth group starting which meant it was another minute closer to it being over. Oliver knew the drill, everyone came in, grabbed a bible and a chair then sat in a large circle. Then they’d be split into smaller groups, assigned a verse and the discuss it before all coming back together and talking about life’s temptations and ways in which they reject Satan.

Oliver did his part, playing the card of religious son. Then once his parents went to bed, he’d plug his headphones in to his phone and wank to the dirtiest porn he could find for free. He had gotten his Wednesday nights down to a routine.

Keep reading

killergabite  asked:

is tarmogoyf good just cus its a fatty for two or am i missing something?

It goes in every deck. At worst it’s a 0/1 for 2, but you’re likely running fetch lands and some sort of 1 drop spells so it’s almost always at least a 2/3 and then at best it’s a 7/8 and that’s not hard. On average, I think it can consistently hit a 5/6. It’s one of the reasons there is controversy around the tribal card type since it just adds another type into the mix. like consider, Turn 1 Wooded Foothills into mountain into Tarfire and you have the makings of a ¾ gofy turn 2. 

What’s more, it’s extremely splash-able. Only costing a single green and one generic to cast and grows through just the normal progression of play, it’s a card that can go in any deck. It won’t always, but it can. It also sees Legacy play.

The reason it’s so expensive is also because it has only ever been printed in sets with extremely low print runs (hence my joke about this meaning that it will only ever be limited to small print runs).

tylertaylorbloodytaylor  asked:

So how do the Darby brothers act as cats

☆The D'Arby bros☆

♡If you expected these two to get along because they’re siblings, then you got a storm coming your way

♡Both brothers have a stash of items hidden in the home. Daniel (older D'Arby) often takes playing cards, dice, and bottle caps. Terrence takes small dolls, stuffed animals, and various chargers.

♡Daniel often takes Terrence’s toys and items from his stash, and then quickly get the shit beat out of him by his brother

♡Daniel meows a particular way when he’s stressed. “Mrrrrrrrow” (Like when he rolled all those Rs when he said raise in the animu) Other than that, both brothers are fairly quiet cats

♡Terrence likes to sit in front of tv screens and look you in the eye. He knows he’s in the way, but you have to get up yourself to get him. If games are being played, he’d still be in the way, but this time he’s watching and silently judging your playing skills

Hope you don’t mind that I just combined the two of them for this, since they were minor characters.

lang is into ygo. of course he is. he runs a beast deck themed after werewolves, which isn’t all that great in competitive, but he loves it and does pretty well, anyway.

while they were dating, lang introduces edgeworth to it. he thinks it’s quite the remarkable game of strategy, and he gets super fucking into it throughout the time they’re dating. like, SUPER into it. chess and steel samurai levels of into it. logic chess becomes logic ygo for a while there. “ah yes, mr. murderedtheguy, you have ACTIVATED MY TRAP CARD. i play SOLEMN JUDGMENT so you ATONE FOR YOUR CRIMES”

the obsession lasts a little while beyond their inevitable break up, but a chance meeting at a local tourney has edgeworth take a break from it. he still likes it – plays casually on the phone, maybe – but it’s never the same.

ultimately this is known as edgeworth’s “ygo phase” and when phoenix finds out about it he won’t fucking let it go

anonymous asked:

Me at all hours of the day: why do people still read blinds why do people still read blinds why do people still read blinds why do people still read blinds why do people still read blinds why do people still read blinds why do people still read blinds why do people still read blinds why do people still read blinds why do people still read blinds why do people still read blinds why do people still read blinds why do people still read blinds why do people still read blinds why do people still rea-

i too would like to know why people still read blinds ESPECIALLY blinds posted on cdan

you’re more likely to get an accurate blind item while playing cards against humanity than you are on that website

anonymous asked:

mental hospital AUs are the worst!

GOOD LORD I KNOW dnejdhew idk why people think you go to a psych ward and fall in love with a cute boy, its lies !!! u get treated like shit and spend most of the day waiting to eat and being annoyed about being woken up early for meds lmao. i’ve read Too Many cause you bet they r the only fics anyone ever writes w/ schizospec or psychotic characters in them and sometimes i am Desperate but good lord …. realistic psych ward au where all the characters play cards in the hall and everyone’s annoyed at one guy for always tryna bum cigarettes off people. no one will read it because it aint Edgy and no one’s in a straight jacket njfnsd

actually it’s women paying a man for sex.. the witcher reduces geralt, a man, to a sexual object to be used and the put aside .. Not only that but they do not see him worthy enough to pay him with currency, but childlike playing cards, therefore infantilising him. THIS is what an SJW future looks like. Wake up, sheeple.