That scene after they find wills body and Jonathan gets in bed and puts his headphones on and cries is one of the most heartbreaking. It’s a quick scene but you can feel that all the hope he had is gone and now it’s just overwhelming emptiness.
The two of you were intrinsically linked from the start, a love story that ended before it began, that lost its middle somewhere after the first kiss and stuck to the roof of your mouth like peanut butter and made his loss unbearable.
His absence is a dull ache located somewhere slightly left of your sternum, you knew he was yours from the moment you met and he smiled at you, showing teeth like an animal backed into the corner would, all well mannered threat, and you answered back with your own rage in the verbal molotov you lobbed at him.
The two of you got on like a house on fire.
And you’re an arsonist, that should have been your first warning but the two of you broke into the jewelry store a few blocks away from the police station and ran through the night opalescent and iridescent and all around shiny and he put a diamond necklace around your neck and you put jewels in his ears and you forgot that fires are never kind to the people inside them.
And okay you promised the crew that you’d be theirs forever but that was a promise that was never meant to be kept, you knew that his fingerprints were all over you, your wrists, your spine, the fist sized muscle slightly left of your sternum, and if you stood under blacklight your loyalties would be there clear as day, guilty as charged and you didn’t care because the two of you were an inferno at that point and to compromise that would be the biggest loss.
He was always to bright for his own good, to shiny, like the tiny opals he wore in his ears that you gave him seeped into his soul somehow, and he was always too quick with his own kind of gospel, the kind that warped people to his side as they shot at him, the kind that painted him as a seraphim, as a god, and you were his chosen until he got sent on a job that was a little to big and they tied him down to kill him and-
He was bleeding when you got to him, he kissed your knuckles like benediction and his last words to you were You were the best mistake i ever made don’t leave me now don’t
And he was your best mistake as well, cause now you’re nothing but the ashes of a house fire with a need to see everything else burn like you did but you’ve got enough matches to see the city leveled in his name and if the two of you can’t have this city at your feet then no one should and it shouldn’t count as a broken promise if you never really meant it.