the other side of the river

The River

The town I grew up in was surrounded by a river. No matter which road you took leaving town you had to cross it. The ancient, muddy Big Sioux River. Every spring and sometimes in the summer it would rage and flood until it felt like the town was under siege. No one could leave and no one could enter until it subsided.

Coming home from the bar one night, my grandfather missed the bridge. He was going almost one hundred miles an hour when he jumped the river crashing into the opposite bank. He was decapitated. His body impaled by the steering column. They never did find his head.

Strangely enough, some twenty years earlier while fishing in that same river, he reeled in the top part of a human skull. He took it to the Sheriff who sent it off to the lab in the city. They tested it and found that it was over 200 hundred years old and most likely Native American. The lab returned the skull to the Sheriff and he gave it back to my Grandfather.

Grandfather kept the skull in the basement. He’d take it out and show it to you if he had a couple beers in him. I held it in my hands after he died. I wondered if it was somehow his skull and time was a strange circle.

When I was ten I saw my first dead body. It was on the bank of that same river, off a different road. Some guy wrecked his motorcycle in the night. His body lay next to the river under a blue tarp the cops had thrown over him. My dad pulled his truck over on the other side of the bridge and we walked back across to where the cops were. We leaned over the rail of the bridge right over the tarp as one of the cops pulled it off. A heavy set dude lay there, almost like he was asleep. But he was so white it was startling. He was also wearing an Earl Campbell football jersey, the same kind Cristopher Cross wore in a video for his mega 1980 hit “Sailing.”

When I was in college, I woke up one morning after a long night of debauchery and someone had covered me up with a blue tarp. I’d passed out in the back yard. When I first opened my eyes I didn’t know what the hell was going on. The world was on fire in blue. I thought I was dead under a tarp like that guy I’d seen when I was a kid. I swear I could actually hear the words to that Christopher Cross song.

“Well, it’s not far down to paradise, at least it’s not for me
And if the wind is right you can sail away and find tranquility”

When I was 14 my best friend and I drove a couple of girls down to the river and parked maybe a hundred yards from where I’d seen the dead guy in the Earl Campbell jersey. My buddy and one girl took off with a 6-pack to build a fire in a clearing. I just kinda sat there as I hadn’t been alone with a girl since I was a little kid. I couldn’t think of anything to say so I told her about the body I’d seen when I was a kid. She wanted to see where. I chugged the rest of my beer and grabbed a couple fresh ones, pointing out the way.

She laughed and dashed off and I dizzily chased her. She was pretty, far too pretty for me. I caught up with her by the bridge and told her the body had been on the other side. She grabbed a beer from me and cracked it open, accidentally spraying herself. She squealed like the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen. I took off my t-shirt. She wiped her face with it, then ran off under the bridge to the other side.

She stopped where there was a bunch of gardenia plants all abloom. “This is the spot,” I said. “His family must have planted them,” she said, half shocked and half sad. I instinctively reached out to comfort her and she grabbed my face with both hands and kissed me full on the mouth. I almost passed out from the excitement and the beer and the running and the perfume and the gardenias and the death.

Three years later she shot herself in the heart with a 12-gauge shotgun. She was pregnant. It wasn’t mine. I’d broken up with her more than a year before.

It didn’t make any goddamn sense. After I heard about it, I got in my car and drove. I wanted to get the fuck out of that stupid little town. Of course, it had been raining for three days and the river had flooded. So I pulled over and watched it. The water was raging in wild white cap torrents and I wondered if the bridge would hold.

The fact that this band exists is so meaningful in itself. 

There is a boy on the drums with anxiety. He uses every drumbeat to drive away the demons in his head. He plays with ferocity yet to be rivaled by any other drummer. He’s got morning colored hair, and river shaped eyes. He is strong, and he plays the drums, and he cares for us.

There is a boy on the right side of the stage. This boy has depression. He’s got wide-open eyes, and blue thoughts that bleed into the air. He fights the monsters with this microphone that amplifies the lyrics large enough to intimidate the creatures. Like shadows on a wall, it makes them afraid. He wants us to be happy, he wants us to be alive.

There is this band. It is not confused, but it is confusing. Not everyone understands it, but that is okay. There is emotion in this band that is not afraid to hide. There is dreams that we are not afraid to dream. There is times in which this band plays, and there is red confetti in the air that reminds us to not find the red confetti in our arms. And when the red rains down, it brings us to the blueness of it all.

There is the clique. The clique is broken people, the band’s people, family. The clique is blue. This group of people hold up their hands, and scream the lyrics to the sky. They sing with reckless abandon, and instead of the world watching and judging, the world is watching and being blown away. When we sing together, we make a sound so loud the entire media stops and stares.

This band exists. That is incredible.

LOGAN SPOILERS

Logan trying to save money to buy a boat for him, Charles and Caliban so they can spend their remaining days on the ocean.
Logan needing reading glasses and Charles telling him he looks younger when he wears them.
Logan wanting to be away from Laura because if it’s anything he’s learned in the 100+ years it’s that every person he has ever cared about has been put in harms way and he blames himself.
Logan calling Charles his dad.
Logan burying Charles by the river to cater to his last wish.
Logan fighting his last fight to protect his daughter. And get her safely to the other side along with the other child mutants.
Logan dying at the hands of the weapon he was supposed to be. Sacrificing his life for his daughter.
Laura calling him daddy.
Logan telling her not to become what they made her to be.
Logan listening to Charles last words to him. To stop and take a moment to feel what it’s like to have a family. And his only daughter giving him that feeling in his last moments.
“So this is what it’s like.”
Laura burying Logan close to the border where he gave his life so she and the last mutants can escape and be free.
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What happens when a bunch of fathers get interested in their daughters’ hobby? In the case of Seinäjoki, Finland, you get River Bulls, men’s synchronized skating team in leather outfits.

As a side note, some of these men had no previous skating experience before the team was started. They want to encourage boys to get into other skating besides ice hockey.

And anything I could think of was mine because it was there
                                                       in front of me, numinously everywhere,
Appearing and piling up …

So to have come to this,
                                      remembering what I did do, and what I didn’t do,
The gulls whimpering over the boathouse,
                                                                            the monarch butterflies
Cruising the flower beds,
And all the soft hairs of spring thrusting up through the wind,
And the sun, as it always does,
                                                 dropping into its slot without a click,
Is a short life of trouble.

Charles Wright, closing lines to “The Other Side of the River,” The Other Side of The River (Vintage, 1984)

soabs  asked:

So first love your tumblr page, secondly I would like some advice, if that's alright to ask. I'm trying to write a story with a character from Oregon and I would like some idea on if they be any phrases words anything really to make it believable

- everyone from Oregon ends their sentences with “praise be to Bigfoot” to show both humility and gratitude
- Oregonians, colloquially known as “Orgies”, make a lot of puns about oregano
- Oregonians (“Orgies”) have a bitter rivalry with Washingtonians. Every seven years, on the appointed day, it is a tradition for residents of each state to gather on opposite sides of the Columbia River and hurl insults and rocks at each other. Since the Columbia River is very wide and throwing something across it is very difficult, these encounters can’t really be considered violent. It would be unrealistic if your character is from Oregon (or Washington) and does not frequently reference this important tradition.
- The Oregon Trail is considered a holy game, and it is always played at funerals to determine who in the family will be the next to die. If the game’s prediction is wrong, Orgies ignore reality and treat the prematurely deceased like living people while shunning those who were expected to die.
- You do not pump your own gas in Oregon - station attendants do it for you. Similarly, you’re not allowed to feed yourself at restaurants - specialized waiters and waitresses come to your table, sit you in their laps, and spoon-feed you.
- Do not mention that Oregon has fewer reported Bigfoot sightings than either California or Washington unless you want to be banned from the state
- In the more liberal parts of the state, you are expected to experiment sexually with a waterfall (if male) or a volcano (if female) at some point before graduating college
- for political complications, the role of black people will be played by white people with locked hair for this production
- A $4.35 cup of coffee in California will cost $400 in Oregon. If you complain, the barista will gently remind you, “No sales tax!” and you’ll end up buying six refills
- Social standing is expressed via the number of bumper stickers on your car.
- The state tree is the Douglas fir - a majestic conifer. In Oregon, a boner is frequently referred to as a “Douglas” or even just “Doug”. If an Orgie suddenly exclaims, “I’ve got to go meet up with Dougie,” it means he has become sexually aroused in an embarrassing way and will seek out the nearest waterfall to ease himself.
- A geoduck is a species of large, edible clam. “Geoduck” is therefore used as slang for both “penis” and “vagina”. The phrase “go Ducks!”, shouted at sportsball competitions, is actually a celebration of sexual liberation.
- Orgies do not use slang like “cool” or “tubular” or “awesome”. Instead, they say “That’s organic!”
- If a white guy tells you about the “spirit quest” he went on, he means he went camping and smoked a lot of weed. I mean a lot. Of. Weed.
- A popular sport is food truck racing.
- If a young person appears single, they are probably in a committed relationship with their bicycle.
- The most popular epithet to be engraved on tombstones is “Gone Squatchin’”

mademoiselle-loser-deactivated2  asked:

Is there a word for the fear/phobia of being forgotten specifically by our most loved one(s)?

Athazagoraphobia is an irrational fear of forgetting, being forgotten or ignored, or replaced.

The fear of being forgotten can arise in childhood if the individual has been left alone or has been ignored for a long time. Medical reasons, particularly dementia and Alzheimers’, can also trigger the fear of forgetting things. Often, family members of people with conditions like amnesia or memory loss fear being forgotten by the patient.

On the other hand, Vergissmeinnicht (lit. “forget-me-not”) is a plant with 5-lobed blue, pink or white flowers with yellow centers. In 15th-century Germany, it was supposed that the wearers of the flower would not be forgotten by their lovers. 

Legend has it that in medieval times, a knight and his lady were walking along the side of a river. He picked a posy of flowers, but because of the weight of his armour he fell into the river. As he was drowning he threw the posy to his loved one and shouted “forget me not”. It was often worn by ladies as a sign of faithfulness and enduring love.

the signs as wlw aesthetics
  • aries: spring wlw; racing each other through meadows, picnics by the riverside, small bracelets made of daisies, ice lollies, lying down and noticing shapes in the clouds
  • taurus: floral wlw; arranging bouquets, long walks through english gardens, flower crowns, tucking a flower behind their ear, floral summer dresses
  • gemini: library wlw; whispering between aisles of books (+ hiding from the librarian), reading bed time stories, sharing favourite books, staying up late discussing recently-finished novels, writing secret messages in between the lines
  • cancer: soft wlw; cuddling under the blankets, watching the rain, listening to music on the rooftop, long walks at the beach, sharing sweaters
  • leo: summer wlw; matching sun hats, sipping peach iced tea, being the best looking couple at the beach, lying side by side in a sunflower field, cycling on a tandem bike
  • virgo: forest wlw; picking berries, tree-climbing competitions, strolling through the lovely dark and deep woods, laurel wreaths, studying nature together
  • libra: princess wlw; gifting each other tiaras, sneaky glances, ballroom dancing in gossamer gowns, secret conversations in carriages, long handwritten letters
  • scorpio: moon wlw; silver eyeshadow, heated late night debates, evening walks, stargazing, secret conversations at 3AM
  • sagittarius: road trip wlw; making plans together, toasting marshmallows by the bonfire, sleeping in tents, swim-racing in the river, singing together in the car
  • capricorn: glow wlw; neon shoes, eating dinner in an empty diner at 11PM, 7/11 shopping dates, texting each other at 3:58AM, watching the sun rise
  • aquarius: space wlw; watching space movies, visits to the planetarium, 2AM debates on the existence of aliens, matching constellation tattoos, sun & moon chokers
  • pisces: mermaid wlw; lavender+aqua+silver hair, 2-people pool parties, swimming far out in the ocean, collecting seashells, doing each other's hair (fishtail braids lmao)
Heart on the Line (part 2)

part 1 - part 2 - part 3 - part 4

You and Bucky had your differences in college, but now you need a place to stay and he needs a roommate, and in order to make ends meet, you two start a phone sex line together.  

“For a Good Time, Call…” AU


author: sugardaddytonystark (formerly buckysbackpackbuckle)
pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader
word count: 1545
warnings: finger fucking

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Easter again, and the palm trees hunch
Deeper beneath their burden,
                                                the dark puddles take in
Whatever is given them,
And nothing rises more than halfway out of itself—

Easter with all its little mouths open into the rain.

Charles Wright, from “The Other Side of the River,” The Other Side of the River (Vintage, 1984)

So, I was watching Star Vs. The Forces Evil episode Into The Wand and something caught my attention. Lil’ Chauncey, Moon’s war pig-goat pet thing, was in Star’s memories. She remembers him.

 She knows Chauncey died in battle but no specifics on which battle or when. Then we get to The Grandma Room and we see Moon’s tapestry and her poem which I sum it up as: Toffee dun goofed. Toffee is clearly terrified and there have been lots of theories as to why this happened. Most of which tend to be shippy or something else.

But look at Moon’s face. Look at that rage, that pure open hatred. What did he do? What could warrant such open hostility from someone we’ve seen as being so cool and reserved? Then is hit me: Star was alive when this event went down. Because Chauncey died in battle, shown here in this tapestry and Moon is clearly an adult and Star remembers Chauncey. Then I remembered how the royal guards used to babysit Star. Why? Where were the nannies? The caretakers? The royal nurses? They taught her how to fight, how to use a sword and weapons, how to kill an enemy with her bare hands before she ever hit puberty. Why would Queen Butterfly, Mrs. Prim and Proper, allow her only daughter to be cared for and basically raised by guards

Because she felt it was necessary to better protect her young daughter. I’m willing to bet this is Moon unleashing some serious mama bear rage against someone who threatened her very young child. Star was old enough to remember Lil’Chauncey, but perhaps not the attempt on her life or whatever it was Toffee was planning on doing to the royal family. Maybe it was a betrayal on his part since there are so many hints and theories revolving around the two.

(Just as a side note, I am very aware of the Moon/Toffee ship and while I do think it is kind of out there, I also kind of like it too. Unless it ends up being like the Luke/Leia thing like one new major theory proposes. In which case, NOPE.)

I also thought it was strange that Moon and River decided to send their daughter to Earth to better control her powers….without any other supervision except for Glossyrick who they and we all know probably isn’t the best person to be keeping a rein in on Star. It probably had something to do with keeping her from setting the whole kingdom ablaze in glitter and flaming rainbows, but I also feel there was something else to it. While there are no mentions of Toffee after Storm The Castle, Moon is clearly afraid. 

I don’t know if we’re doing the right thing River.

Also, for all of Moon’s faults, she loves her daughter more than anything. Star’s safety is paramount to Moon and even the cleaving of her family’s ancestral wand is no where near as important to her as Star’s safety. 

Oh, I’m always mad. But I’m happy that your safe.

I love this theory because it explains so much: why Moon acts distant but at the same time is a constant presence in her daughter’s life. Moon maybe trying to do what she can to protect her only child while also living up to the very high and difficult position of being a Queen of an entire…planet? Like, she’s trying her best to be a good parent and Queen even if she doesn’t go about it in a way that Star can respond to.

Also, don’t tell me we aren’t going to learn something new on Monday about Moon. Look at this image I found for Page Turner’s preview. She just looks so tired and so sad. This is a woman whose seen some shit, done some things she’s regretted and probably has a lot of dangerous enemies.

All to protect her only child. At least, that’s my theory until canon will most likely disprove it.


EDIT: OK, so…I am both awed by and grateful for all the likes and re-blogs this post has gotten so BIG THANKS TO EVERYONE! XD

           Also, after watching the last few episodes of the season I feel like this sort of at least helps support my theory. There is no proof – yet – I hope – but give what we’ve seen it makes me happy. Moon clearly is worried about Star. She wants her training to progress farther and quicker, there is urgency in her voice and it’s clear that she’s scared. Also, all the magic in the universe is disappearing? Makes me wonder just WHAT that wand even is, or at least what makes it so special if Ludo having half of it means it has negative effects on a universal scale.

           Also? Toffee’s picture comes up on the screen with the corn and everything? Like, Moon, pay the frick attention!        

           Another thing is that while Glossyrick claims to be doing his job to train Star to be a good Queen I still don’t feel…like he’s a good teacher. He plays the vague-advice thing way too much but then he kind of just lets Star do whatever she wants to anyway so…I don’t know if this is the most effective way to train Star since she is still just a young kid and has a hard-enough time paying attention. I don’t know if there is something to it but I don’t like how cavalier he is about things. The final few episodes’ kind of bugged me. Like, dude, this is her child’s future were talking about. She has every right to stick her nose in thank you very much.

           But Moon’s fears and the lesson she learns in this episode tug at the heart strings. This woman has to accept that her young daughter is growing up fast, into a universe that is facing some serious peril and Star will undoubtedly have to fight soon enough. Moon is afraid, the fear is palpable and she wants to make certain that nothing can go wrong. She probably does have some suspicions of what’s causing it but she can’t be certain. Also, Eclipsa? Heck yeah is she going to be important given how frequently she’s been name dropped.

           Things are getting serious in the universe of the show, Moon is afraid and she’s know that Star is going to end up in the middle of it. For a woman who already has so many huge responsibilities on her shoulders and yet she probably feels powerless to protect her only child.

           Gah! The feels!

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“Would you like to donate your body to science?”

Dr. River and their Blasters. They are just some of the many weapons they created to help protect monsters from humans, and better their odds if another war happened. Eventually they give three of the blasters to others for summons and keep one for themself. 

~ Sol

Discipline 101

So you have the ambition. You have all the answers. All you lack is the discipline.

Unsurprisingly, this is a problem most people have, so don’t worry, you’re not alone.

Tell me, do you have a concrete goal? Or is it something vague like, “Rule the world”, or “get rich” or “become famous”?

Usually those who lack discipline have a habit of getting ahead of themselves and they end up having all these fantastic goals without any knowledge of how to achieve them. They have big ambitions, but no clear plans, no visible steps, and no foundation to start their life on. It’s the equivalent of standing on one side of the river and being able to see the other side, but having no method of making it across.

It’s good to have a starting point, and know what you want in the end. But the path to earning what you desire isn’t pre-made for you. It’s up to you to lay every brick and measure everything out. In your life, you’re the architect, you’re the engineer, you’re the investor, you’re everything.

So the how do you get some discipline?  It’s simple: You need to know how you’re going to do something, before you set out to do it.

Step 1: Get Motivated

Make a list. And make sure you handwrite it. Two columns. Think about everything you have a problem with, all your interests and passions, and everything you have ever wanted in one column. In the other column, spend as much time as you need to come up with solutions to each issue/goal. Don’t write one side, without the other.

Spend a couple days looking at that list. Make it into a poster, use it as your phone background, it doesn’t matter as long as you make sure you see it every day until you feel something. I’m saying that incredibly vaguely because people are fueled by different emotions. For me, it was rage.

Every morning, I stared at that list of everything I’d ever wanted, every little problem that made my life miserable and I got furious. To see what my life revolved around so callously written on paper, and feeling so close yet so far, that drove me insane. My anger made my passion double, and nothing fuels discipline more than passion.

Step 2: Plan

Once you’ve gotten yourself suitably motivated to take charge of your life, don’t waste any time. Start by creating a plan. Now that you know what you want to do, figure out how to do it.

Create a timeline for the next year and then a looser version for the next ten years. It can sound daunting, but when you fall off track at some point (and I can guarantee, you will) you’re going to need something to point you in the right direction.

For your detailed, one year plan, make sure your goals are distributed into two categories: Short term and Long term.  

For your short term goals, list everything you want to achieve in that year and how exactly you’re going to do it.

For example,  if you want to lose weight, I don’t just want to see you write down “lose weight”. Tell me how. Tell me how much. Tell me by when. “Lose five pounds by October by going to the gym 4 days a week”, or “Cut down on eating X food so I can lose 5 pounds by October”, etc. Be specific.

For your long term goals, pick 3 things you want in general. The first thing should be something you can achieve in that year, and it should be the focus of your entire year. The second thing is something you don’t necessarily need, but it makes you happy anyways (like spending more time on a hobby, or saving money for a new designer bag, etc.). The third thing should be something that stays fairly consistent in every single ‘year-plan’ you have. Ultimately, it’s either your most important desire, or very close to it.

These long term goals will help you put together your 10 year plan, and create a better sense of direction in your life.

Step 3: Prioritize

Learn to prioritize these tasks and goals. Don’t go to sleep until you’ve felt like you’ve completed all your tasks for the day. Don’t give in to distractions and the illusion of “well-deserved fun”. Sure, going clubbing may seem fun on  Saturday, but it won’t be fun on Sunday night when you’re frantically writing a paper that’s due in two hours. There’s always time for fun later, there’s always another concert and another football game and another party. But some things have a greater impact on your life than just one night of “fun”.

I’m not saying become some kind of a workaholic. There’s always a time and a place for everything. If you try to follow your plan without any distractions or any fun, you’re going to get bored and then you’re start to hate your plan and your life and then it gets messy. Avoid all that by knowing when you’ve earned a break. It’s very important to discern when you can afford to step away from work to have fun with your friends and when going out is just going to distract you from an important deadline. 

Step 4: Act

Now, don’t just write these goals down and shove them in a dusty file on your desk. Keep them within arms reach. Look at them frequently. What I like to do is every morning, I write down a short term goal I have for that week/day/month and one of my long-term goals in my planner. It’s just a little reminder and keeps me focused throughout the day. I don’t feel like my day is complete or productive until I’ve had some progress on either the long term or short term goal.

Also, keep in mind that while planning is a great thing to do, don’t expect yourself to stick to every single detail of the plan. Life happens, and there are certain things you cannot control (although it wouldn’t hurt to try). Don’t be too hard on yourself if you find yourself unable to complete one of your goals for the day/week/month. It happens to everyone, we’re all human. What you need to focus on is the big picture and move on. Don’t waste precious time wallowing in past mistakes. Time doesn’t wait for anyone, least of all for you.

Step 5: Commit

Discipline doesn’t come from just being motivated or having a plan. It comes from consistency. Form productive habits, start efficient routines, and stick to them. For example, if you want to become a writer, make sure you write something, however small it is, everyday. One sentence, one paragraph, one page, the amount doesn’t matter. It’s important to understand that something, however small, is better than nothing. This constant dedication to your work will help you move one step closer to your goals.

The more you force yourself to stay in line when faced with temptation, the easier it will be every other time you are faced with the same challenge further down the line. Everyone forms habits. Just make sure they’re the right ones and you’d be shocked at how much your life could change.

Everything you need to become disciplined is inside of you. Everyone has the willpower and motivation. It’s just some people know what to do with it.

Just remember: Get motivated. Plan. Prioritize. Act. Commit

And the world is yours.

Seeing Stars

Prompt: Pre-Guardians of the Galaxy fun with Peter; Letting loose for the night the reader goes out for a fun night and finds herself back in the Milano for an intimate night with loosened morality.

Pairing: Peter Quill X Fem!Reader

Warnings: Cursing, explicit sexual content, and drug use (A fictional marijuana-like space drug called Lunar Shrub)

Originally posted by cute-guysxx

Tonight was going to be a night of escaping your inhibitions and indulging on impulsive desires. Full of physical pleasures and lack of responsibility. Nothing was going to come in the way of you having a good time.. But most importantly, nothing was going to get in the way of you getting laid. 

That’s what had brought you to this current situation, walking alongside the charming Peter Quill as he led you back to his ship. The handsome Terran had approached you at the bar and after a few laughs you had decided he would be the perfect escape. A nice night full of sexy fun and laughs, nothing more nothing less.

He had landed his ship in a public parking area not far from the bar and the two of you were almost there. He guided you happily with one strong arm wrapped snugly around your hips, his hand sinking closer and closer to your ass with each step.

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Oh Sehun//Love Thy Neighbor

Originally posted by wooyoung

Summary: You move into a new apartment after your boyfriend leaves to go abroad, making your relationship long distance. You’re tired, stressed and missing him - and your next door neighbor isn’t making life any easier. (Part 1/Part 2)
Scenario: neighbor!AU, slightly angsty
Word Count: 3,712

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