the only reason to watch this movie

anonymous asked:

It's annoying as fuck to have people tell you that the only reason you like Snape is because of Alan Rickman. This is true for some fans but I'm fairly certain that most of us read the books before watching the movies. Most of us don't picture Rickman when we think of Snape. This is a character who both challenges and encapsulates binaries. Red & Green, Ugly & Lovely, Light & Dark etc. But no, we like blogging intellectual meta so much because Rickman's voice makes us act like dogs in heat.

I hate everything about this sort of comment, if I’m honest.

…because it’s all about attempting to devalue someone else’s enjoyment of a character or of fandom; it’s all about suggesting that you don’t really understand the character, and it’s a crude way of attempting to prove their own fandom credentials as being superior to yours.

But here’s the funny thing; there’s an obsession that people have about being a PROPER FAN - as if reading something a week earlier than someone else means you have more of a right to enjoy the media than someone else, as if liking the books before the films makes your opinion more credible, as if someone who first read Potter in 2017 cannot offer insight into the world because they weren’t around from the start.

With that in mind, I appreciate that the anon here doesn’t love Severus because of Rickman (I am a funny stance in the middle, really - because I love Rickman, but the Snape in my head is not Rickman) - but even if you do love Snape because of Rickman, that doesn’t make you any less of a fan, nor does it mean that your opinion is any less credible.

It’s all ludicrous, and is merely an effort to devalue your contributions.  Just laugh at people who post such things; it says more about them than you.  It’s evident to me that most people who post about Snape appreciate exactly what you’ve outlined in your ask - the beautiful juxtapositions and contradictions in the character…and really, it feels as if people who accuse fans of liking Snape solely because of Rickman are still failing to grasp Snape’s character - because they simply cannot fathom any other reason for liking him.

More fool them.

anonymous asked:

i followed you because of loki!!! i found the first captain america movie so fucking boring and i hated steve rogers in both avengers films so i never watched another cap movie and last year because you never stopped posting bucky stuff i checked out tws and cw and now im in the bucky dumpster and it's all your fault oh and i actually like steve now

Dang you have been here a while my dude!! I watched tws before I saw aou so I was a bit more forgiving of him in that (mainly because I then realised steve wasn’t the problem it was just joss’ shitty writing lmao) but yeah he was literally my least favourite avenger when I saw the first avengers movie and tbh even now the only reason I watch tfa is for peggy and that sweet unfiltered stucky content from a time before the writers had to no homo them to stop the dirty gays from claiming them 

chaotic--cosmos  asked:

Please talk about the mummy returns

pristinepastel said: Hey, i know you like the first mummy, but what about the mummy returns?

I HAVE RETURNED…after like a day. 

but what the people want, the people get!

RIGHT SO THE MUMMY RETURNS!

aka the only sequel that is 1000% just as good as the first one. like holy shit. 

ten years later and we meet our heroes again. rick and evie are happily married, going on adventures, and evie’s dream of becoming a respected scholar has come true and they’ve made a tiny human! 

the only unrealistic part being that they only had one kid, i mean they are still all over each other ten years later and you’re telling me they only had ONE kid.

okay. sure jan. 

but boy o’ boy is that one kid awesome! 

alex o’connell. this kid is literally:

  • 50% evie super-klutz-genius. 
  • 50% rick screams-at-things-that-are-illogical-to-scream-at. 
  • 50% uncle jonathan’s sheer dumb luck and wit. 
  • 10% i’m really bad at math. 

you get the point. HE’S GREAT. also the actor passed on harry potter because, JUST LIKE ME, the mummy 1999 was his favorite movie and he just HAD to be in the sequel. alex is just such a smart-ass little shit. that much like his mother, accidentally brings about the apocalypse by opening something he shouldn’t have:

Originally posted by rafikecoyote

ARDETH BAY TIME LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. he has a much bigger role in this one. GOD BLESS. (because he was supposed to die in the first one, but test audiences loved him as much as we do, so they kept his fine ass around) he still looks prettier than everyone and is still so done with white people once again. 

*after almost being killed on he bus* “this was my first bus ride.”
*after realizing they’re gonna make him fly again* “why can’t you people ever keep your feet on the ground?”

he’s just such an awesome A+ friend goals, because while he probably needs to go be with other medjai to prepare for battle against anubis’ army (yikes), he stays with the fam to rescue alex. it wasn’t even much of a thought for him really, rick and evie just batted their eyelashes and he was like: *sighs* “these white people are always messing my shit up, but they are my white people.”

Originally posted by lestatscherie

jonathan: still beautifully the same as ever. witty, clever, and would do anything for his family. 

“be quiet alex! if there’s going to be any hysterics, they’ll come from me!”

“if you see anyone come running out screaming, it’s just me.”

when he boasts about being a good shot and ardeth is internally like “i’m gonna die.” THEN HE SAVES ARDETH. hell yeah.

Originally posted by aurhireactions

rick: he’s still screaming at things. BUT IN DAD MODE. he’s the ultimate dad.

“you, lighten up. you, big trouble. you, get in the car.”
*sweetly* “honey, what are you doing, these guys don’t use doors.”
“knowing my brother-in-law, he probably deserves whatever you’re about to do to him, but this is my house and i have certain rules about snakes and dismemberment.”

Originally posted by lmhotep

evie: still a super-klutz nerd, but with C O N F I D E N C E. little baby librarian is now a honey badger of ASK ME IF I GIVE A FUCK! and also a re-incarnated princess

“no harm ever came from opening a chest.”

rick: “i swear that kid gets more and more like you every day.”
evelyn: “you mean more attractive, sweet and devilishly charming?”

Originally posted by a-ripley

we meet izzy, another one of rick’s ex boyfriends, who is a much more reliable mode of transportation than previously mentioned murder buses. 

imhotep: still emo. still wants to make out with his gf.

anck su namun/meela: hella good villain. she bomb af and 100% wants to take over the world. amazing. she actually has like a really cool role this time too!!! like so much screen time. 

Originally posted by marimoody

the rock…i mean the scorpion king, he’s another emo villain with goofy cgi rendering and like 4 million terrible made-for-TV spin off movies that you are lying if you haven’t watched at least one of them and felt that utter disappointment. but who cares the rock is pretty. and this was his first acting role and the reason we have him where he is today. 

thank you mummy returns for giving the world actor rock johnson #blessed

Originally posted by charmander-ann

THE ROMANCE AGAIN:

normal action movie sequel romance: same guy. different girl. repeat of first movie’s romance. hehehehhehehehhEHEHEHEHHEHH. 

not here bitch. 

rick and evie’s love has only grown stronger. they still bicker like old ladies at bingo night. the still look at each other like they hung the moon. they’re still disgusting jonathan because they CANNOT KEEP THEIR HANDS TO THEMSELVES. one kid my ass. they still support each other and protect each other like crazy. they love each other so much and it’s so healthy and pure and there is some good in this world mr. frodo.

Originally posted by yocalio

the bottom line here is. what’s the point of watching the mummy 1999 if you aren’t going to watch the mummy returns immediately after?

JUST DO IT.

Originally posted by mummymovies

10 movies to watch when you’re broken

1. Her (2013) dir Spike Jonze

This movie is so great and it’s soooooo tumblr. Spike Jonze is a really fabulous director and his movies are always so beautiful. This movie takes place in a somewhat futuristic version of LA and it is about Theodore, a greeting card writer who falls in love with his operating system. It is silly. Silly movies rule.
You’ve totally seen these pics on tumblr.

2. Lost in Translation (2003) Dir. Sophia Coppola

Lost in Translation is a movie that, if you haven’t seen already, you have to watch like directly after Her because the directors were married and divorced in 2004. This movie is said to be reminiscent of their crumbling relationship, Spike Jonze being Bill Murray’s character and Sophia being Scarlet’s. Her is said to be Spike Jonze’s reaction to this film. ScarJo is such a bae.
“A faded movie star and a neglected young woman form an unlikely bond after crossing paths in Tokyo.”

3. Lars and the Real Girl (2007) Dir. Craig Gillespie

This movie is VERY important because it has Ryan Gosling in his chubbiest, dorkiest form and that’s something everyone has to see. It follows a similar premise to Her, except instead of being in love with an OS he’s in love with a sex doll. Exciting. 

4. Blue Valentine (2010) Dir. Derek Cianfrance

This film also has Ryan Gosling in it so clearly it’s fab. This is the type of movie that leaves you thinking about every relationship in your life forever. It inter-cuts between the beginning of a marriage and the end. “You said for better or for worse. You said that. You said it. It was a promise. Now, this is my worst, okay?”

5. The Place Beyond the Pines (2013) Dir. Derek Cianfrance

OKAY! IT’S ANOTHER RYAN GOSLING FILM! I still don’t really know how I feel about this movie as a whole, but it’s really beautiful and Ryan Gosling is in his prime in this film. It’s essentially a three part movie. It also has Bradley Cooper and Dean DeHaan in it so that’s three reasons you should watch it. The cinematography is A+ also. 


6. Palo Alto (2014) Dir. Gia Coppola

Palo Alto is the type of movie that’s honestly about nothing, but I found that it’s the only film about adolescence that actually captures how it feels to be so heartbroken, confused and lost for no real reason. The cast is stunning! It has that ‘first film’ vibe as well which I think aids the film. 

7. Beasts of the Southern Wild (2012) Dir. Benh Zeitlin

Another first film for the director. Beasts of the Southern Wild is a stunning film. It’s very very emotional as well. Be prepared to cry. 

8. Moonrise Kingdom (2012) Dir Wes Anderson aka King of film

You either love Wes Anderson or you hate him. I personally love him. Moonrise Kingdom is so perfectly awkward. It’s great to watch when you’re sad because it’s funny in a way that’s not too in your face. It’s the perfect relief to your sadness.

9. Clueless (1995) Dir Amy Heckerling

After you’ve watched Moonrise, you’re ready for something light. That something light is Clueless. You can use Cher’s “as if!” attitude to get over whatever has led you to this list or to this blog. 

10. Grand Budapest Hotel (2014) Dir Wes Anderson

Another movie by king Wes. It’s the perfect quirk fest and it features Ralph Fiennes in a really quirky role which is surprising. It’s funny but not a comedy and I love it. Again, Cinematography rules.

omfg!

Are the Amethysts seriously trying to provide emotional support? This is so not what they were designed… for…

You ever say (or type) something out loud, and it triggers a sudden inspiration? Yeah, I know. Usually that only happens in the movies (or on any given episode of House) but here we are.

“When a gem is made, it’s for a reason.”

“They burst out of the ground already knowing what they’re supposed to be.” 

“And then that’s what they are.”

“Forever.”

Rose was made to take care of humans.

Rose rebelled to protect humanity.

This makes entirely too much sense.

Wayne Family movie night

- Happens before patrol. It is Bruce way of getting the family to spend a bit more time together.

-Alfred reminded everyone that bleed does not go on the sofa. It was his way of saying no killing your siblings.

- Cass invited Harper and Stephanie over.

- Dick had Barbara come as well.

- Kate said she would come later in the night. She is wanting to meet the rest of the family.

- Duke has never had the joy or horror of a Wayne family movie night.

- It takes an hour just to find a movie to watch. Turns out everyone gets very defensive about their choices.

- Jason got shot down at for any zombie movie.

- Duke is always trying to convince the family to watch Lord of the Rings. He is offended any time someone says it is a movie of people walking.

- Action movies never work since everyone corrects the fighting.

- They settle for Zorro if no one can pick something.

- Lots of popcorn. Half gets eaten, the rest lands on each other or in the couch.

- Pillows get thrown, food gets thrown, somehow Damian got thrown. It may have been due to his mouth.

- Cass, Harper, and Stephanie take the floor. Tim is near them on the ground away from Damian. Duke on the ground but gets to lean against the couch, prime spot for food.

- Alfred has his own chair where he can watch everyone but be out of the way of flying items.

- Barbara is on the edge of the couch with Dick next to her. Damian claimed the other side near Dick right away. Bruce is on the side of Damian on the other end of the couch.

- Jason takes the only empty chair but later moves closer to the family. Kate takes his chair when she sneaks in.

- Tim and Bruce are the type to quote lines right before it happens. This is when the throwing pillows happen. Usually at Tim.

- Barbara is the one to say that can’t happen in real life. She is also making fun of Dick for hogging all the popcorn.

He tries to make you jealous (Zach Dempsey)

shit, so i’ve been in love with thirteen reasons why recently. it’s got me hooked. zach dempsey has been one of my crushes on the show, so here’s one based on this prompt. i’d love taking suggestions! ring me up if you have any ideas- or, better yet, drop by my ask if you want me to make any more for you.

prompt: “i like you a lot, so i tried getting you jealous,” ft. zachary dempsey

Originally posted by pitterpratter


“Ah shit, Y/N,” Jess Davis groans as she wiggles into the tight row of cushioned chairs, trying to make her way to the middle of the line next to you. You giggle as the popcorn spills all around her clenched hand and into the laps of everyone nearby. There are whimpers of “Sorry, sorry!” and grunts before she finally lands into the cushioned chair next to you and sighs. “Ah Jesus, I didn’t know that would be so hard.”

"Maybe you should lay off the gummy worms,” You put in, and laugh as she glares at you and hits your arm. Your hand digs in the popcorn and you stuff a handful into your mouth, the satisfying crunch as you chew making you moan. Ah, popcorn. Jess rips open a pack of the gummies and snorts at you. “Maybe save those noises for Dempsey, hon.”

You choke on a kernel as she purses her lips trying not to laugh, her eyes steadying on the previews onscreen. A few snickers make it out either way, and you scowl at her and stuff more handfuls in your mouth.

Zach Dempsey and you, to put it lightly, were not friends. It was difficult to push you into a room together and not expect a night of sour jabs and endless bickering. Everyone at school knew it, and it was something that happened way before you were even freshmen. There was never a time you weren’t at each other’s throats. One time, he’d spilled liquor down the front of your dress at some party and you’d hidden his pants in a bush while he was in the hot tub later that night. Lately it’d been more of a joke between your friends, with Jessica mockingly swooning how romantic you two would be. 

The lights start to dim and you wiggle back into your seat, ready for some good old romcom- and then the Paramount clip cuts into black for a moment, making you groan and try to dodge whoever was blocking your view. You crane your entire body and glare daggers at the idiot who interrupted your film before it even started. You loved your movies, and you were pretty serious about getting the “full movie theatre experience” (which Jess liked to mock). Please, you were paying a good four dollars for a movie you could watch for free online. Your eyes rise up to the back of his head, taking in a mess of straight black hair, broad shoulders and the school’s infamous Letterman jacket hanging on them. You memorized the back of that head. You knew those shoulders.

It was Zach Dempsey. With him were Jason Friar and Justin Foley, all wearing their Lettermans. You felt Jess shift in her seat at the sight of them. Wrapped in Zach’s arm was a smaller girl, snuggled into his shirt and playing with his fingers around her neck. They scooched into the seats almost directly in front of you, with the girl turning her head suddenly and getting the tips of her ponytail in Zach’s mouth. He swats it away, annoyed, but smiles instantly when she turns her head to look at him.

“Oh no,” You moan, making Jess snicker at you. You don’t miss the way her eyes flicker to Foley and turn away. “Just what I needed.”

"Who’s the girl?” Jess wonders, squinting. “Not a cheerleader. That’s Jenny, I think. Or her friend Bryana. I can’t be sure. We have Com with them.”

"Ugh, who cares,” You roll your eyes and try to turn to the movie. As long as they don’t ruin your film. This was some good stuff showing- if you focused enough, maybe you could ignore them. Jess shrugs and follows suit. You take a sip of your cherry cola as Martin Freeman jogs up into the scene.

The movie drifts by, but you find that you don’t enjoy it as much as you would have. Your eyes keep landing on the back of Dempsey’s head- and as much as you hated it, his arm around the girl’s. Your popcorn started tasting sour. You focus on some surfer guy’s abs an hour in but your mind keeps drifting somewhere else. Suddenly, before you can even blink, Zach cranes his neck slowly and looks directly at you, as if he knew you were there the entire time. He catches you looking and his cheeks tinge pink as he whips back around. Jess snickers. “That’s like, the fourth time he’s done that.”

"What?” You blink. Wouldn’t you have noticed? Jess takes a slurp of her drink. “Yeah, didn’t you notice? I mean, he’s had like two bathroom breaks. Both times he’d looked right at you before he took his seat.”

You decide not to say anything and reach out for a gummy worm. You keep watch, but Zach never craned his head again.

The movie ends before you know it, and Jess is a mess. You can’t stop laughing at her state, and after a while she laughs with you and dabs at her tears with paper napkins, but her mascara’s everywhere. “Shit, Y/N, why aren’t you crying with me?” She scowls, and starts hicupping. You try to hide your smile. You find it best not to tell her that you were staring at other things than the movie.

The lights flick back on and the people file out. You grab your empty popcorn buckets and leave, but not before Jess excuses herself to the comfort room to freshen up. You drop the buckets in the trash can near the snacks counter in the lobby and wait for her, waving a hand at Hannah Baker, who was filling up drinks at the soda fountain. Your hand travels to your back pocket and realize your phone is missing, so you run back into the cinema’s swinging doors hoping not to find it lodged in between seats with a wad of chewed up gum.

You find something even more tramautizing. Sitting on Zach Dempsey’s lap was his date, clutching his face with her pale hands and making out with him. He’s fidgeting in his seat, but trying to keep still. You note that his hands are on the cup holders and not on her waist. Your face screws up and you groan in disgust, picking your phone up from floor. “Christ, Dempsey, get a room.”

Zach’s eyes widen and he scrambles up, pushing the girl out of his lap. “Yeah? Well, this was an empty room ‘til you showed up, Y/N.”

You snort, tucking your phone into your back pocket. “You’re a pig, Dempsey.” There are mumbles of "Ooh”’s from Foley as you stalk back to the entrance, where Jess was waiting for you, ready for some milkshakes at Rosie’s. You loop your arm in hers, failing to hear the “Shit, man,” and swears from inside the theatre.

-

You head into school next Monday with a great start, munching on your bagel as you make it to your locker. You’re wearing an oversized hoodie and high waisted jeans, but it doesn’t stop the jocks from whistling when you pass by. You roll your eyes at them and chew on your bagel as you turn the corner. High school boys were too immature. No wonder you never found the want to date one.

Passing by you in the hallway was Zach Dempsey, crowded with his band of loud friends who are laughing and pushing each other. You meet his eye and he stops, slinging his backpack over his shoulder. You roll your eyes and look away, and you can almost hear him sigh in defeat. Someone slaps him on the shoulder and whistles as you walk by. “Daaamn, Dempsey, you gotta let us share.” You don’t see him shove the guy and stalk off.

The first half of the day passes by like a breeze. By the time fourth period ends, you barely feel like the day has started. You head out for the cafeteria, stacking all your books in your arms and making it through the door, but it wasn’t long before you could hear footsteps running after you. “Hey, wait up, Y/N!”

You turn around and groan, continuing to walk. “Dempsey.” You try not to glance as he jogs up next to you and ruffles his hair, staring at you with this half grin of his you didn’t want to admit you liked.

“Uh, hey.” “Something you need?”

“No, uh, actually, I wanted to talk to you.” He looks at you sheepishly.

“Okay, talk.”

“Um, you look nice today,” He offers, biting his cheek. You stop, staring at him in disgust. “What?” He trails. “You’ve got to be fucking kidding with me.” You shake your head in disbelief and keep walking.

“What’s wrong?” He keeps up. “Seriously, Dempsey, are you hitting on me now?” “And why would that be so terrible?”

“Geez, Dempsey, what is wrong with you?” You deadpan. “You are such an ass, you know that? Do you always treat girls like shit?” You gape at his blank face. “Jenny. From last Saturday. You think it’s OK to throw girls around like that?”

“What? No! I- uh, Jenny and I aren’t serious, if that’s what you’re thinking.” He winces, scratching his neck.

“Yeah, right. Of course not.”

“Look, can I take you out this weekend? To Rosie’s maybe? I’ve wanted to maybe get to be with you out of school. We could go to the movies?” You’re at the cafeteria doors now, but Zach shuts them with his left arm, blocking the way in front of you. You snort. “You can’t be serious.” You watch as his face falls and his mouth twitches.

“What’s so bad about going out with me?”

“God, you are such a jerk, Zach!” You groan, throwing your free hand in exasperation. He winces at the sound of his name being used so hatefully- he’s only ever heard you say Dempsey. He tries to forget about all the times he’s dreamed of his name coming out of your mouth, but decides he hates it when you yell it at him. “You think it’s fun, don’t you? Having no respect for girls whatsoever. You get off buttering them up with kisses and flowers and take them to the movies only to ignore them completely a day or two later. Who, in their right mind, would ever want to go out with someone like you?”

“I only ever wanted to go to that fucking movie theatre because I heard you were going to be there!” His voice rises to a shout. It echoed through the halls, and you wince knowing someone would hear. “You think I wanted to watch that stupid chick flick, with all that shit about high heels and prom? Fuck, I never even liked Jen! Why would I when I’ve always wanted someone else?”

His breath was heavy. Suddenly it was hard to swallow. You try to stand your ground, staring at him. “Nice one. You think it’d be easy for me to believe that, what with your list of conquests and a new girl making out on your desk each week? You must be daft, Zach Dempsey.”

He scowls. “I never wanted them. Never. I just- I just thought that maybe if you saw that everyone wanted me, just maybe you would have wanted me too.” His face softens, and he starts fiddling with his fingers. “Okay, I get it. You could never want me. I know, I just thought I could change that somehow. I’m used to getting my way, you know. Girls flock me, throw themselves at me. I’m used to getting everything I want, but then you’re here, in front of me, and fuck, I’ve never wanted to kiss anything more in my life.”

“Okay,” You say softly, before you can stop yourself. He barely hears it, but his ears perk up. “What’d you say?”

“I said okay,” You clear your throat, and bite your lip to keep yourself from smiling as his lips form into a helpless grin. “Saturday night, Rosie’s?”
“Fuck yes!” He fistbumps the air, then stops as soon as he realises you’re still in front of him. You giggle and hide your face in your hands as he leans forward without thinking, grabbing you by the waist and lifting you in the air. You couldn’t help your cheeks from turning red. Zach Dempsey was adorable. He really was.

“Okay, I’ll see you in Trig?” He asks, palming his phone in his front pocket. He’d have to tell Foley, he was thinking. Man, his best friend would be so proud. His head was rushing when he swooped in and pressed his lips to your flushed cheek. “I can’t wait.”




thanks for sticking around! give this a heart and reblog if you want more, and follow my blog if you want to be notified overtime i post a new imagine! this is a brand new blog and i’m so excited to see what ideas you might have for me.

reasons why the princess diaries 2 is actually the best movie ever made

ok so i know that when we were all young fanchildren we all watched this movie and sighed dreamily. but i am here to tell u that this movie is even better than u remember

1. the main conflict in the movie is the arranged marriage. i’m gonna stop right here, because princesses in arranged marriages are a classic fanfiction trope that we are all trash for. don’t lie to yourself. but it gets BETTER. not only is there an arranged marriage… the guy she’s arranged to marry is actually a really chill dude. u like this dude. u know they would be good friends and partners. he would make a good king. but sHE DOESNT LOVE HIM!!! she doesn’t love him. and it would be so easy for the narrative to say ~oh look at this selfish girl she has a handsome titled good man ready to marry her she’s so SELFISH for wanting passion and true love, so naive~ (see fuckboys: i’m so nice and handsome why doesn’t she love me she’s horrible) instead the narrative presents her not marrying him as a perfectly valid choice and one the viewer sides with her on. the narrative supports her choice and makes it clear it was the right decision. ADDITIONALLY, the solution presented to fix the arranged marriage problem is to DESTROY THE PATRIARCHY. like???? don’t fuck with me this movie is perfect

2. literally the other main conflict is the love interest. he’s essentially a conman trying to convince mia to fall passionately in love with him so he can steal the throne. but along the way… he falls in love with her. THIS IS LITERALLY THE PLOT OF THREE THOUSAND FANFICTIONS PEOPLE

3. speaking of fanfiction…this movie is one. like, i’m not even joking. the first princess diaries movie essentially compiled the first 3 books into a movie, but the sequel wasn’t based on the books at all. disney just pulled something out of their asses and was like “this will make the fangirls happy”

4. at the beginning of the movie mia graduates from princeton’s woodrow wilson school of international affairs… literally one of the best international studies programs on the planet.. then she’s flown to a castle…where she’s a princess..and has hot men falling all over her…and wears ballgowns…like…mia is such a mary sue but somehow the movie manages to avoid making her one AT ALL

5. also holy shit??! mia doesn’t just stand around looking pretty as a princess.. she’s clearly really smart and genuinely cares about the people of genovia and does her best to serve them well even to it’s hard work… like damn mia is fucking committed to being a good queen she’s not just a princess because castles make good backdrops for romances

6. the queen/joe YAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS u fucking know u shipped that shit

7. THE ENTIRE MOVIE IS ABOUT FUCKING THE PATRIARCHY. MIA IS PORTRAYED AS KIND AND SENSITIVE BUT THAT ADDS TO HER APPEAL AS A RULER NOT DETRACTS FROM IT. AT THE END OF THE MOVIE SHE’S LIKE “fuck these rules written by old white men, i’m gonna make my own less sexist rules” AND THEN SHE FUCKING DOES?!? SHE FUCKING CALLS OUT THE SEXISM OF THE LAWS AND THEN CHANGES THEM. HELLO WOMEN IN PARLIAMENT! GOODBYE BOYS CLUBS! A WOMAN IS FULLY CAPABLE OF RULING ON HER OWN WITHOUT A MAN AND SHE FUCKING DRILLS THAT INTO THEIR GODDAMN HEADS

8. chris pine. what a hot piece of ass amiright

9. the number of times something fucking bizarre happens to mia and she theoretically looks into the camera like she’s on the office is comedic gold honestly. the maids?? flirting with her arranged husband?? climbing out a window?? the fAKE LEG!? mia is just trying to live her life but the universe keeps fucking it up. i feel u mia. 

in sum i have n o idea how the fuck this movie got made but goddamn is it not god’s gift to man

More Voltron Headcanons ft. More Allura & Coran
  • Allura doesn’t understand finger guns so whenever she makes a pun she whips out a bayard and shoots to the sky 
  • Coran sometimes steals Allura’s fingernail trimmers so he can trim his luxurious mustache 
  • Hunk has stretch marks that look like the “Scream” painting 
  • Lance and Shiro are too embarrassed to tell Coran why it’s “organism” not “orgasm” 
  • Pidge invented a pair of rocket boots 
    • they broke their leg before they even put them on 
  • Keith tried making his own pair of heels so he could be the same height as Shiro. He wanted them to be cool but instead they looked like the boots on the playbill of “Kinky Boots” 
    • he still wears them when everyone’s asleep
  • Pidge has a polaroid camera 
  • Shiro loves wearing crop tops because it means everyone has to look at his abs 
  • The curve of Lance’s ass is: y= -(sin(x^(1.7/6)+4)+(1/x))+10
  • Hunk is allergic to Keith’s lame comebacks
  • Shiro’s text alert is the Full House theme
  • Keith and Lance sometimes slide down the hallway in their socks to “Old Time Rock and Roll” 
  • Allura learned Chinese in a week because it was so similar to Altean
    • Keith and Shiro think it’s hilarious because Keith is Korean and Shiro is Japanese so they don’t understand her at all 
  • Pidge is too short for Hunk to give them a piggy back ride 
  • Hunk, like Andy Dwyer, can and will give anyone a piggy back ride any time of day no matter what 
  • Shiro and Keith use NERF guns for training exercises 
  • Pidge and Lance stole one of Keith’s Super Soakers so they could trick Coran into thinking he had the slipperies again 
  • Allura’s hair changes color depending on how pissed off she is 
  • Keith thinks skinny jeans are the only acceptable form of pants 
  • Lance can do a perfect singing impression of Shakira 
    • prefers not to 
    • does it only to make Keith feel better 
  • Coran can smell how gay everyone is 
    • seriously goddamn
  • Keith and Pidge follow Bill Nye on Instagram
  • Keith chopped off his mullet so he could have a sweet undercut and Lance didn’t talk to him for a month 
  • Pidge, Shiro and Hunk watch Disney movies whenever Keith and Lance fight for more than an hour
    • All of them love Big Hero 6, but for different reasons 
  • Shiro’s voice cracked super bad while they were on a mission and Lance wouldn’t stop laughing for three days 
  • Coran once asked Pidge what the function of a rubber duck was 

wordmage-girl  asked:

Why do you want to fight Nicholas Sparks? And how would you challenge him (thrown glove, e-vite, etc)?

Thrown glove, definitely. This has to be PERSONAL, even though my problem with him is really everything he represents.

I have talked before about how his brand of dreck has basically killed the romcom, but I don’t think I’ve talked about why I hate his brand of dreck, so gather around, chickadees, for “How do I hate thee, Nicholas Sparks? Let me count the ways.”

1. Tragedy porn. Look, honestly, I liked “A Walk to Remember.” Mostly because of “Only Hope” and Shane West’s face, but I liked it (if I watched it today, even divorced from the whole of Sparks’s canon, I would hate it, but that’s a separate issue). But as time went on and I watched a couple more of his movies and then heard about the others, it’s just … look. I know that we make stories to make people feel a certain way. We want to elicit an emotional response. And that’s a good thing, you know? And I know I rail about darkness and sadness a lot, but I’m not even saying that stories should only try to elicit good emotions. That feels shallow.

But with Nicholas Sparks and other tear-jerker-type stories (see: reasons I never got into Grey’s Anatomy, reasons I’m more likely to read straight-up darkfic than what people call “sads”), the emotional manipulation is incredibly blatant and formulaic and … I don’t know, is “cheap” the word I want? I don’t see the point in a story that says “Here’s a thing you love. Fate is going to take that thing you love from you. The main character is going to lift their chin like Scarlett O’Hara and say ‘tomorrow is another day!’“ I don’t feel like it’s something the creator is sharing with me, I feel like it’s something they’re trying to do to me, and I don’t take kindly to that.

2. White Cis Hets Touching Foreheads.

3. His whole brand is marketed to women, books and movies both, they’re chick flicks, date movies, stuff For the Women, but he sure is a dude. Not that men aren’t allowed to write romances, but it’s just that slimy feeling of “a wise man making money off all those silly weepy romantic women” rather than “a wise man showing that it’s okay for both women and men to cry over a love story where tragic things happen.” Like. Nora Roberts sure doesn’t have this kind of franchise. And I can’t say I enjoy reading Nora Roberts, but one could excise the sex from her books and make movies and market them to women, but somehow nobody got to be a romantic-book-adaptation juggernaut until Sparks. Partly because he’s a man and partly because

4. Happiness Isn’t Art. There seems to be this implication that because things end badly, because they’re sad, because they make you cry, it’s okay that they’re romantic. The sadness makes sure that they’re art. And fuck that, honestly? Tearjerkers are fine, whatever, they can (and should, I don’t want to stop people writing for the genres that appeal to them) exist in the world even if I don’t want to consume them, but nobody in this world gets to tell me that the unhappiness elevates them higher than the romcom. That it’s better than Nora Roberts not because he’s a man but because the sadness makes it somehow more worthy.

5. Look at that face. Tell me you don’t want to punch that smug face.

6. Sometimes you just read a book or watch a movie and know that the person behind the story is ideologically opposed to you in pretty much every possible way.

Just to sum up, I guess … I’m a person who loves reading and writing love stories. I always have been, since I was a little kid. If there’s tragedy and difficulty along the way, sure, I’m willing to go along with that, but when there’s someone who consistently says “no, this is only worthy if I take happiness away from you, because happiness isn’t art, because romance is only worth of attention if tragedy interrupts it,” then I get ready for a fight. And since he’s very much the trend leader there, I am pretty much ready to meet him in the pit at all times.

Little Empath Things
  • Not knowing if an emotion is yours or not so you have to analyze how what just happened would reasonably affect you
  • Getting overwhelmed in crowds
  • Not being able to watch sad or gory movies without getting super distressed
  • Not being able to watch news about tragedies without getting super distressed
  • People thinking you’re not serious when you say that you can make special connections with animals
  • Everyone being comfortable with talking with you about problems and feeling compelled to help them
  • SUPER sensitive feelings. Like, crying so easily
  • S E N S O R Y   O V E R L O A D
  • Trusting someone to tell them only for them to say “Oh yeah, most people have empathy”

so many scenes in wonder woman made me cry, not out of sadness but out of an overwhelming sense of pride and awe (the battle on the beach! the liberation of veld! no man’s land), but only two moments truly stunned me:

  • when steve+crew held up the metal door for diana and cried “shield!”
  • when the crew urged her on as she raced passed their smoke signal toward ludendorff’s base

both of these moments lasted only a few seconds, but i think the reason why they moved me so much was because they depicted something that almost never happens in superhero movies—namely, a woman getting to be the protagonist, the invincible hero, the warrior that everyone trusts to defeat the villain. at no point did steve or his crew doubt diana’s abilities; instead, in true sidekick fashion, they gave her an opening and watched her conquer. this was her time, not theirs. 

when diana leapt off that metal door, when she tore through the field in pursuit of ludendorff, it was like she was sending a message. we are strong, she said. we are stars. yes we can. 

Movies Bloodborne fans should watch: (if you ask me :P)
  • Brotherhood of the Wolf (French movie about the Beast of Gévaudan. Bloodborne’s fashion is most likely inspired by its beautiful costumes.)
  • Bram Stoker’s Dracula (Cainhurst? Cainhurst. Cheesy at times.)
  • Crimson Peak (Gothic romance at its finest.)
  • Hellboy 1 / 2 - The Golden Army (Just watch the two movies, okay? SO GOOD.)
  • Van Helsing (yeah yeah, I know this one isn’t that great. WHO CARES! harmless fun with crazy weaponry and big monsters.)
  • Mary Reilly (the classic tale of Dr.Jekyll & Mr.Hyde seen from the point of view of Jekyll’s housemaid who, obviously, has a crush on him. )
  • From Hell (Jack the Ripper. Johnny Depp, Alan Moore, lots of drugs.)
  • The Whisperer in the Darkness (The best adaptation of Lovecraft’s story of the same name.)
  • Red Riding Hood (this movie gets all the hate just because it has the same director as Twilight but is a pretty decent movie with great atmosphere and a nice twist near the end. It’s not that easy to figure out who’s the wolf! My only complaint about this flick is that the actors are waaaay too attractive in pure young-adult romance fashion. Still worth a watch.)
  • Tenshi no Tamago (aka Angel’s Egg. Weird, visually stunning, very esoteric and reminds me a ton of Fishing Hamlet for some reason. The plot is cryptic and mysterious, just like Bloodborne’s.)
  • The Company of Wolves (a weird classic based upon Angela Carter’s dark fairytales ~♡)
  • Pride, Prejudice and Zombies (It’s better than you think.)
  • Goya’s Ghosts (SPANISH INQUISITION! Heresy! Torture! Drama! Doesn’t “look” like Bloodborne, but the themes are there and is overall a good historical movie with great actors.)
  • Penny Dreadful (TV series. This one is a mixed bag for me, but the photography is stunning and Victorian to the core. Rushed ending tho. And a lot of gratuitous sex scenes that don’t go anywhere. I warned you.)
  • Taboo (TV series. PRETTY NICE)
  • Solomon Kane (PURITAN DUDE KILLS STUFF)
  • Hellsing Ultimate (Anime OVA which needs no introduction.)
I Like You [Min Yoongi]

Warning: Contains smut. Do not read if you are underage.

A/N: This is very, very long. Grab a coffee, sit back and enjoy. Thank you to @katythekitty for your suggestions with the plot. I guess in a way this is kind of your requests? Idk. 


‘Y/n?’ Yoongi’s voice questions softly as you stretch across the floor of the dorm, arms reaching above your head to get into that tight spot in your lower back. His foot pokes out from his position on the low couch, gently nudging your thigh to roll you slightly on your side.

‘Mmm?’ You respond, the sleepy tone in your voice giving away the true nature of your state. The few cans of beer were sitting heavily in your stomach, a beverage that since your college days had always had you yawning before the night was over. Lazily, you flop on your side, scooting across the wooden panelled floors.

‘I was just checking you were still awake. It’s 2am and the movie finished. Want me to flag a taxi for you?’ You let out a slow whine, body wrapping around his feet to clutch his ankles tightly.

‘Why, you don’t want to hang out with me?,’ You pout, clinging to his legs like a small, fluffy koala. You could almost feel his body tense under your touch, an audible breath hissing through his teeth as your arms claw their way up his black denim jeans. ‘C’mon, Yoongyoong. I thought we were having fun. We are only two movies into this Harry Potter marathon… We’ve still got another 6 to go. Where’s your stamina?’ Your hands reach up to tickle behind his knees, before sitting upwards to envelop the entire lower half of his leg into a hug.

‘Fuck… you’re weird.’ His face was still flat, expression blank as he watches you crawl your way up his body, coming to sit comfortably next to him, lounging into the comfort of the soft black fabric of the long hoodie he had chosen to wear. Instinctively, your hands wrap around his waist, head placing itself in the crook between his shoulder and arm.

‘You love it, though, right?’ It takes a second, his body heaving with a deep sigh - the air of which dusts lightly across the crown of your head - before you feel his arm drop, grasping your shoulder and pulling you a little closer to him.

‘Not really.’ He responds just as flatly, a flicker of a smile lacing across his face so briefly you you wouldn’t have seen it if you weren’t trained in finding it. It’s the only evidence you have of what he was really saying.

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Android Companion AU

Lucis is an advanced civilization, the crown city of Insomnia is self sustaining and generally safe, but the limited land with which to build on can barely fit the growing population. You are an independent adult who had landed a dream job in the heart of the city, your parents bid you farewell from their farmhouse just east of Lestallum, and now you are living alone in a very crowded, claustrophobic, and constantly noisy business district.

One day, you find an offer of comfort in your solitary life:

Model: NOCT-1.5 (limited number of units produced):

  • This model is the cutting-edge technology of all companions available in the market, the be-all end-all royalty of the trade. it is never advertised because very few people can afford it, but you’re a tech nerd and you’ve heard of the legends
  • It’s usually ridiculously expensive and waaaay out of your range, for some reason, this one is on sharp discount in your local computer shop
  • the clerk tells you it’s on a discount because it has been taken out of the box by a previous owner and returned, but is in top shape otherwise
  • it’s a small investment even after the price cut and you’re seriously trying to talk yourself out of it, but the more you look at the android behind the sheer plastic, the more you are entranced by the sharp features and slim design.
  • a part of you hungers to see what the eyes look like once turned on, and what kinds of apps and functions you can install on such a rare product
  • you take it home, and the moment you plug it- him in, bright piercing eyes glow red for three seconds, and then mellow out to a soft crystal blue

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Jealous (Jughead x Reader)

Prompt: hey darling! im in love with your imagines! is it possible to request a jughead x reader where the reader and jug are dating and jughead spends WAY too much time with betty (maybe bc of the blue&gold ?) the reader is jealous but jug is just amused by it? like he does the whole “awwww! is someone jealous?” kind of teasing? lol idk if that made any sense but if you figure out a way to write it that would be amazing! thank youuu

A/N: I took my time with this one and changed it a bit! I hope you like it. Requests are welcome!

Masterlist

Jealous (Jughead x Reader)

You had a bag from Pop’s that you managed to go get for you and your boyfriend. Jughead’s been staying in the Blue and Gold room during lunch lately and you haven’t really spent any time together this week so you wanted to treat him to some burgers.

Stopping to see the door closed, you peaked in the little window to see Jug and Betty standing close with their backs turned towards you.

You reach to open the door and call for Jug when Betty leans her head on his shoulder and he wraps his arm around her. Your heart stops.

Jug never wraps his arm around you. Hell, He hates any PDA. Feeling a little upset, you turn and go find one of your other friends. Maybe Veronica would want some burgers.

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then somebody bends

This is what happens when I listen to the Beauty and the Beast soundtrack at 3 a.m. while thinking about Sterek (also on ao3!)

When Stiles invited himself over to Derek’s loft for quote ‘Netflix and chill’, Derek had a very clear idea of how the evening was going to play out. But even in his wildest dreams, Derek never would have expected this.

He had expected Stiles to arrive in his usual whirlwind of flannel and sarcasm and blinding grins, greeting him with a smirk and a wink if he was feeling particularly bold. Expected a deep, dirty hello kiss and an appreciative once over as Stiles plopped down on the couch.

Admittedly, Stiles had arrived in his usual fashion, letting himself in without bothering to knock like he owned the place. But there was no flannel or ironic graphic shirt in sight, Stiles instead wearing his red hoodie over a plain gray t-shirt.

He had still greeted Derek with a wide smile but there was no hint of suggestion in it, nothing indicating that he was thinking about doing anything other than simply watching a movie. Even the kiss Stiles gave him as he took a seat on the couch was just a quick peck on the cheek.

But there was no trace of anything disconcerting in Stiles’ scent, nothing that would set off any alarm bells. Only excitement and contentedness radiated from Stiles as he efficiently set up his Xbox and pulled up Netflix.

Derek expected Stiles to pick a movie from his preferred genre, an action packed thriller featuring a gratuitous amount of violence and explosions and unnecessary female nudity. Or, if not that, some sort of sci-fi flick with terrible CGI and too bright fake blood and just as much unnecessary nudity.

But with a few taps of the buttons on his Xbox controller and a brief use of the joystick, Stiles navigated to the Disney movie section. With another flick of the joystick and a few more clicks, Stiles queued up the new Beauty and the Beast movie.

He had glanced up at Derek out of the corner of his eye, chewing his bottom lip almost nervously. Setting down the controller on the coffee table, Stiles leaned back on the couch and softly murmured, “You don’t mind, do you?”

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