the old kanye west

2

Old Kanye tried to warn us, “Even if you in a Benz…”

Good reminder: even LeBron James, the most notbable black athlete in the world, ain’t escaping racism. This is systemic not a few bad eggs. Wearing a jersey, making sneakers, becoming an icon cannot save you from the ferocity of racism.  Remember that, all you “it’s really class” clowns.

IF RAPPERS WENT TO SCHOOL TOGETHER

Action Bronson
The fat bully who loves food

Aesop Rock
The science fair winner

Angel Haze
The A.G. dyke who knows how to fight

Andy Mineo
The born-again Christian

A$AP Rocky
The fuckboy with a fashion sense

Asher Roth
The surfer kook

Azealia Banks
The one ratchet bitch that nobody likes

Cibo Matto
The twins who have eating disorders

Danny Brown
The nerd with the weird laugh

Desiigner
The illiterate

Donald Glover / Childish Gambino
The deep-thinking poet who used to be socially awkward

Drake
The heartbroken kid who is coping over his ex by hanging out with his friends

Earl Sweatshirt
The metalhead in the back of the classroom

Eminem
The poor kid with anger issues

Hopsin
The kid who tries to educate everyone else; the “streetpreacher”

Flavor Flav
The kid who is always late for his classes

Flo Rida
The kid who loves his hometown way too much

Flying Lotus / Captain Murphy
The quiet kid who lives a double life outside of school

Gangsta Boo
The girl everyone is afraid of because she has a lot of older brothers

Gil-Scott Heron
The super-senior jazz enthusiast

Iggy Azalea
The white kid who tries to act black; the “burger”

Jay Z
The leader of the popular crew with a criminal family history

J. Cole
The straight A student

Joey Bada$$
The musical old soul

Kanye West
The douchebag who always plays the victim

Kendrick Lamar
The kid who escaped the gangbanging lifestyle

KiD CuDi
The pothead who sneaks out of Algebra to smoke alone at the parking lot

Killer Mike
The gossiper

Lil Jon
The wingman who helps the others get girls

Lil Wayne
The black kid who tries to act white; the “coconut”

Lil Yachty
The SpongeBob-obsessed eight grader with social anxiety that hangs out with the highschoolers during recess

Lupe Fiasco
The teacher’s pet

Macklemore
The only kid who actually watches the news

Mac Miller
The Internet-famous kid who hosts weekend parties

MF Doom
The graphic novel fanatic

M.I.A.
The transfer student who focuses on politics

Nicki Minaj
The wise single mother who knows how to get her life together

Pitbull
The alcoholic

Pusha T
The drug dealer

Rae Sremmurd
The freshmen duo

Soulja Boy Tell ‘em
The dance major

Stitches
The poseur

Trina
The whore

twenty | one | pilots
The sensitive kids who try to be on everyone’s good side

Tyler, The Creator
The class clown

Wallpaper.
The slacker

Yelawolf
The proud redneck

Young Thug
The closeted homosexual

Yung Lean
The Tumblr kid who brags about their vacation to Tokyo last summer