So I googled dumb things people have written in their APUSH DBQ’s:
At the Boston Massacre, colonists were throwing ice and lobsters at British troops.
The British started diseasing the natives with blankets covered in epidemics.
Obviously the British won because the French aren’t exactly known for winning wars.
Shaking up a Coke bottle is never advisable, especially if you plan to drop a Mentos inside. Unless you’re trying to cause an explosion, you’ll unpleasantly be faced with a large, sticky mess to clean up. Unfortunately, Coke and Mentos weren’t invented in 1763, so the British could not learn that lesson.
Franklin Roosevelt was a Rough Rider who fought in the French and Indian War who would later be elected president.
During the Boston Tea Party, the colonists bombed the harbor… with tea.
I think the South kept slaves just to make the North mad.
Those who could see the West began salivating.
Recent studies have shown that Abraham Lincoln was a vampire hunter. And everyone knows that southern planters were vampires using human slaves to do their bidding.
Harry Truman led many slaves to freedom.
Once they reached California they were called Sixty-Niners, which meant they were gold hunters.
One of the most well-known gangsters in the 1920s was Al Gore.
In response to the immigrants, they passed the Alien Seduction Acts.
It was hard to tell the Irish apart from each other, since they all had red hair and green eyes.
Immigrants brought diseases, but worst of all, they brought their religions.
The 1920s were like a lap dance inside an atheist rock bar.
The Kuts Klute Klan was very racist.
We became a nation where sex was a thing for fun and could be purchased. We went from “celibate” to “sell-a-butt.”
Many Irish and German immigrants came from Ireland
Eisenhower threatened massive retardation on the Soviets
Nixon was always throwing up peace signs – this says a lot about his foreign policy.
During the Civil War, both sides built nukes.
Nixon secretly dropped nuclear bombs on Cambodia.
The girl across from me has HUGE boobs. I can NOT concentrate.
(traces hand on the page) Hey AP reader… HIGH FIVE!!!!!!!
Dear fellow APUSH students, no matter how unprepared you are, just know that you’ll do better than these people.
I picture all of Caboose’s sisters as crazy competent geniuses in their respective fields. One’s a pro wrestler who is like, buff as all hell. Another is an expert in A.I tech. One has the best hair salon on the entire moon. The eldest is on of the best pilots the USNC has ever seen (cough, niner, cough).
There is one thing that brings them all together though. The first is that they dote on their baby brother like crazy, cus once the youngest, always the youngest. The second is that there is a “talk shit get hit” policy for ableist comments, because Caboose was always different and while he could deal with his bullies, he shouldn’t have to.
Some asshole: “What a absolute *insert ableist word of choice here*”
5′1 Hair Salon Sister, appears stage left with a still hot hair straightener. “WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU SAY ABOUT MIKEY!”
Caboose: Oh no.
Hair Salon Sister: “I HOPE YOU’RE NOT ATTATCHED TO YOUR SHITTY UNDERCUT CUS YOU’RE ABOUT TO BE BALD.”
I got a great question from @jailmom on the post “The 7 Elements of a Scene”. The question was about how that post could apply to quiet, distinctly-not-actiony scenes. I didn’t even think about writing a post like this, so thank you for the excellent observation!
Anyway, here’s how the elements apply to a low-conflict scene, illustrated by a scene from Up.
Mr Fredricksen, Russel, Dug, and Kevin are on their way to Paradise Falls, but must set up camp for the night. Russel has tried and failed to make a tent.
What’s at stake? Mr Fredricksen’s resolve to remain unattached to anyone.
Russel’s Goal: He really wants to be Mr Fredricksen’s friend.
Carl’s Goal: He really doesn’t want to be friends. Thus far, he’s regarded Russel as a mildly annoying obstacle, slowing down his goal of getting the house to Paradise Falls. And since he’s stuck with Russel, he wants to keep him as a mildly annoying obstacle. Growing attached to anything would be the worst thing that could happen (he believes).
Escalating Conflict: They’re “fighting”, meaning their goals conflict. It’s not outright of course, not an argument; they’re not even aware what’s at stake, and what the significance of the situation is. But really, the subtext is battling over what their relationship is going to be. Annoyance and annoyed guy? Or kid and grandfather-figure?
Russel: “Awh. Tents are hard.” (Exhausted)
Carl: “Wait, aren’t you ‘Super Wilderness Guy’? With the GPM’s and the badges?” (Grumpy derision)
Russel: “Yeah, but … can I tell you a secret?” (Sheepish)
Carl: “No.” (Russel wants to share something. Carl doesn’t wanna hear it.)
R: “Alright. I never actually built a tent before. There. I said it.” (Says it anyway. Honest. Mostly, sweet.)
C: “You’ve been camping before, haven’t you?” (Surprised, slightly judgmental.)
R: “Well, never outside.” (Honest again.)
C: “Well, why didn’t you ask your Dad how to build a tent?” (Curious, in spite of himself.)
R: “I don’t think he wants to talk about this stuff.” (Suddenly concerned)
C: “Why don’t you try him sometime? Maybe he’ll surprise you.” (Helping him, in spite of himself.)
R: “Well, he’s away a lot. I don’t see him much.” (Explanatory)
C: “He’s got to be home sometime.” (Trying to prove that Russel can fix this on his own.)
R: “Well, I called, but Phyllis told me I bug him too much.” (Now kinda sad)
C: “Phyllis? You call your own mother by her first name?” (Beginning to be emotionally involved, so covers it with contempt. Kids and parents these days!)
R: “Phyllis isn’t my mom.” (Surprised.)
C: “Oh.” (Realizes he’s been wrong about him.)
R: “But he promised he’d come to my Explorer ceremony to pin on my Assisting the Elderly Badge, so he can show me about tents then, right?” (innocently optimistic, hopeful. Sad.)
C: “Hey, uh, why don’t you get some sleep. Don’t want to wake up the traveling flea circus.” (Danger! This kid is invading Carl’s closed-off little world. This must be avoided.)
R: “Mr Fredricksen, Dug says he wants to take Kevin prisoner. We have to protect him! Can Kevin go with us?” (Worried)
C: “Alright. He can come.” (Relenting, though keeping up the grump act)
R: “Promise you won’t leave him?” (Hoping to rely on him, trust him.)
C: “Yeah.” (Agreement, still grouchy)
R: “Cross your heart?” (Sleepily, one last promise.)
C: “Cross my heart.” (This is the turn of the scene, and the moment that Russel “wins” it. Because this is something Ellie said to Carl. Something that symbolizes her, part of the moment he started loving her. Saying it again signifies the turn.)
Russel is sleeping peacefully.
C: "What have I gotten myself into Ellie?” (Looks at his floating house, the symbol of his attachment to the past and to Ellie. Knows he’s lost the battle. Russel isn’t just an annoyance anymore.)
Turn: Well, Carl is officially emotionally attached.
So! Scenes work no matter the level of conflict. As long as there is conflict present – two characters (or more) in opposition – the scene will work. Anyway, this was really fun to write. Thank you to @jailmom for the excellent question!