the nanny style



OH MISSUS SHEFFFIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEELD! Can we call you that now? We, the broads of the world, must pay homage to our ancestors. And you, Miss Fine, are our reigning sovereign.

How could we forget your revolving wardrobe of early 90s Moschino Couture? We haven’t forgotten what we learned at 6:30pm every weeknight: black turtleneck + loud textured mini + black opaque tights + black suede pumps = WIN. Those over-the-knee suede boots? Now we’re all verclempt. We loved your collection of Todd Oldham coats and the occasional Dolce & Gabbana leopard ensemble. And that fluffy pink bathrobe with the giant flowers? It haunts us to this day. We are truly humbled by your bulletproof approach to everyday dressing.

Now that you’re a married woman, which Sheffield offspring is gonna inherit your wardrobe? Maggie was last seen in yet another Paris Hilton B-movie, Maggie got her kit off for HBO and Brighton miffed casting agents worldwide by transforming into a human penis. Miss Fine, do you really trust your precious couture vault with the cretins you raised? Pick me, pick me!

So what if the last few seasons of The Nanny sucked total shvantz. Post-Nanny, you tragically contracted cancer schmancer and rose above it like a true gangstress. For these reasons, and many more, Franny, you’ll always be our number one bubeleh xxx 

“Winds in the East, mist coming in. Like something is brewing about to begin…”

Chapter One

Joana couldn’t postpone the matter any further. All this past week she’d worried and fretted over this whole pregnancy and damn nanny situation. She had to tell Travis that she was pregnant. And even more important she needed to tell him what she’d done even though he probably wouldn’t be happy. He always kept things under his control, she couldn’t have any secrets hidden from him otherwise she risked a thunderstorm of anger from him. She was surprised she’d managed to keep one so big for so long. Moreover, the nanny would be paid out of his money since she didn’t have any regular income. Being a stay at home mom didn’t pay much money wise.  

Taking a deep breath, she approached him while he was getting ready for work early in the morning. She was more than sure he was going to yell at her, but that really couldn’t be helped right now. Maybe just this once, he could be compassionate enough to let her get the help she needed. Three kids and fourth on the way, seriously? She felt like a machine that was about to go kaput from overuse.

Joana stood at the bathroom door searching for the right words. “Honey, I need to talk to you about something.”

“Be quick, I can’t be late,” he snapped at her, not sparing a single glance her way.

Joana thought to herself how very typical of him that was, not paying attention to anyone or anything but himself. In moments like these, she deeply regretted marrying him only after six months of dating. Back then, he was different. Sweet, kind, considerate, worshipping the ground she walked on. Gradually he’d become this cold hearted constantly annoyed stranger who shared the bed with her. She noticed the bits and pieces of his old self when he played with their daughters, however that wasn’t a regular occurrence either. Those moments were becoming fewer and farther between. Rubbing her sweaty palms over her pajama pants, she finally spoke in a low voice. “Travis, I’m pregnant.”

“You’re what?” he asked, shooting her a surprised look.

“Pregnant.” She repeated, then added hastily. “And I want to hire a nanny,”

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Wanted: Nanny

When Joana Grace finds out she’s pregnant with her fourth child, her world comes to a screeching halt. Four kids? How was she going to survive four kids when she was barely handling three? But unlike most problems this could be easily solved.

Simple really.
Hire a nanny.

20 interviews later and Joana was starting to think she’d never find the right girl. Her next interview is her last hope. Then in walks a tall, curly haired…


She took one look at this green eyed tattooed man and thought to herself, this was never going to work.

Winds in the East, mist coming in. Like something is brewing about to begin…”

By co-authors madforhoran and dibsonthat1d!

Banner by niallschestrug!!!!

“Winds in the East, mist coming in. Like something is brewing about to begin…”

Prologue - The Test

Joana started her day just as she always did, she opened her eyes and stared up at the ceiling of her master bedroom She listened to her husband snore lightly beside her in their king size bed. She strained her ears to see if she could hear her children clamoring to be fed. When she heard nothing she lay there wondering how long she could actually lay in bed before her bladder started screaming for her to get up.

It was around that time that she threw the covers off with a reluctant sigh and climbed out of her big warm bed. Today was just like every other day except at the same time it wasn’t at all. She walked into the master bathroom and looked at herself in the mirror. She smoothed back her hair, wiped the leftover mascara from under her eyes before her gaze dropped to her belly then to the countertop where a pink cardboard box lay. She groaned as she picked it up and flipped it over in her hands. Her left hand dropped to her still flat abdomen and she let out a soft breath. She couldn’t believe she was doing this right now.

How could she be pregnant again?

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