the music i listened to during my childhood and then the music i listened to when i was in high school

r e s t   i n   p e a c e  //  chester bennington

this has got to be one of the hardest hits with a celebrity death i have ever dealt with. my childhood and teenage hero, my idol. we all knew you dealt with a lot growing up, and you portrayed the pain so well with your lyrics. the lyrics meant so much to us all who where going through the same pain, letting us express and realise our pain and also realising we are not alone in this world.

i remember my hybrid theory album was played so much my parents even knew the album off by heart. i would listen to that album so much, especially when i was moving around and dealing with bullying in school. meteora was definitely the album that helped me transition from country to country and helped me get through a good amount of high school. minutes to midnight helped me let out my anger and pain during the middle part of high school, when bullying was at its roughest.

i do admit, i warred off linkin park after minutes to midnight, but the album ‘a thousand suns’ was such a great album and i still listened the crap out of it, especially during my times in mental hospital. and we get to ‘one more light’ which was such a beautifully yet painful album to listen to, but really made me appreciate your music and growth, i even expressed my love and respect for you guys on the heavy mv and is now one of the top comments on the video. 

the many years of being an intense lp fan were so great. moderator for the official chester fourm, being part of the lpu, constantly on the lp official chatroom, all the linkinparktv videos and exclusive songs. it was truly a brilliant time. i’m not even going to lie that i have stopped doing all of that now, but it never stopped my love and support for you guys, even if it was more quiet compared to how it used to be from me.

hearing about your passing and suicide really hit home. it hit me hard. i never got to hear your voice live. i never got to meet you in person to thank you for being part of a band that helped me grow into the stronger human i am today, but, i hope you do realise how much of an impact you had on so many of us.

i really, really, really wished we were able to help you battle this demon that took you away from the world. depression is never a joke. behind all your dad jokes and smiles, there was a deep sadness hidden away from the world. i wish you were still here with us.

thank you so much for blessing us with your vocals, your talent, your music and your life. thank you so much. i love you so much. thank you forever. #ripchester

10 Tips For The IB: Non Academic

1. You are what you eat. 

Weight gain is an all too familiar battle for not only me, but many more students around the world. I’m sure there are periods of your time where you tend to eat more. Be it the time of the month, during a time of high stress or when you’re bored, either way - your hand is reaching for that bag of sweets and those sweets are soon in your mouth. Well, doing the IB is quite like being on a perpetual period, it’s painful, can be bloody and seems to last forever. To counteract the almost inevitable weight gain, make sure you know what you’re eating. Your body image is the last thing you want plaguing your mind. 

2. Fitness? Ain’t nobody got time for that. 

After a hard day of slogging off at school, fitness is right at the back of your mind. Working out at the gym sounds absolutely ridiculous after 7 hours of non-stop brain activity, and going on a run? Um, please. However, this tip really goes hand in hand with the one above. Working out actually leaves most people feeling more energised after the work out, than they were to start out with. Exercising is not limited to lifting weights and going on five mile runs. Find what works for you. Pilates, yoga, aqua jogging, spinning, whatever, just do it (pun intended.) You may be thinking “I hardly have enough time to sleep let alone work out.” 30 minutes out of 24 hours is just 2% of your day. TWO PERCENT. Think about it. 

3. Be selfish.

There are going to be many times when you will have to sacrifice socialising for schoolwork. You may feel as if you are letting your friends down but listen, you have the right to put your own self and your own future over others. These two years hold a significant amount of potential to shape the next few years of your life (maybe even the rest of your life) give them the importance that they require and deserve. Give yourself the importance that you require and deserve. 

4. Read outside of your English curriculum. 

Reading is good for the soul. As we grow older, we seemingly have less time to sit down and read a novel that we want to. Too often I find myself falling asleep with a book I’m assigned to read in my hands. Studying really does take the joy out of reading. I’m sure your childhood was filled with a love or appreciation for books. Reading engages your mind, broadens your understanding of the complexity of humans (not to mention your vocabulary) and can transport you to another world. Read whatever you want - cliche romance novels, your favourite childhood book, classic literature, a horror story that’ll make you shit your pants. Just read. 

5. Never deny yourself the joy of listening to music. 

If you’re in need of new songs go on 8tracks.com. They have tonnes of playlists made by very cool people (really, as cool as you could possibly get i suppose) who have insanely good music tastes. 

6. Your peers don’t care. 

Regardless of what pre-university curriculum you may be doing, high school seems like a fighting pit. As if you’re the losing gladiator in the colosseum filled by your onlooking peers. You may feel as if everyone is looking at you, just waiting for you to mess up so that they can laugh in your face. In all honesty, they are all just worrying about themselves. Your peers don’t care what you dress like, what kind of music you listen to, the pitch of your voice, the colour of your hair. They don’t care what you do. It is so hard internalising this but you must. 

7. Take ‘mental health’ days 

There will  times when things just get a bit too much. Take a day of school and just spend it on yourself. You will not miss out much in one day - you can always ask your friends what you missed anyways. Take this day to watch the movies you want to, eat the food you want to, paint your nails the colour you’ve been wanting to but have had no time for. Take your dog on a walk. Eat ice cream from a cone. Take this day to focus on you. It can get a bit draining otherwise. 

8. Respect your parents.

As a teenager, we often forget to respect our parents. We’re just far too busy to reply when they call, or answer their questions or give them a proper sentence that consists of more than just “fine” when they ask us how our days went. Your parents are your biggest supporters. They will stand by you when others wont. Respect them. 

9.  Make time for the little things. 

In two years, you will be at university, bogged down with even more work than you have now. Take time to see the beauty in your current surroundings. Savour your last few years of childhood. You will look back on this time and regret that you didn’t otherwise. 

10. Have faith in the process. 

You may loose motivation. You may feel it is too hard. You may want to quit and call it a night. Don’t give up. You must not. Have faith in the process, have faith in whatever you believe in: Jesus, Allah, Vishnu, Buddha, the universe, science, the law of attraction - whatever it is, have faith and trust the process. 

Translation: ZEAL LINK Personal Interview - Omi

While she’s wild and aggressive onstage, when Omi’s offstage, she is reserved and speaks few words. What does she have to say about why she met the band, and as the guitarist of exist†trace, what messages is she trying to transmit? This shell-shocking personal interview talks about things that “have never been talked about before,” and reaches profoundly into deep territory.

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BTS My Biography: V

[This is not particularly spectacular or funny, but everyone should read about the life of actual sunshine Kim Taehyung.]


After J-Hope and Suga, the third member to make his entry is the beloved, 4-dimensional V. From early childhood memories to his intentions for the future, we got V to tell us about his life until now and from now on.

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We Cool? We Cool. Why Jeff Rosenstock Matters

by Erik van Rheenen

Most “this band means a lot to me” stories follow a certain narrative tack. They start with discovering the band as an impressionable, bright-eyed teenager, probably introduced by a wise older sibling, a mixtape burned from a best friend’s CD-R drive, or maybe headphones shared with a crush on a long ride somewhere, falling in love over four chords and split earbuds. That’s followed by enthusiastic discography-diving, tracking down the most obscure B-sides and splits that bootleg music blogs offered under their proverbial trench coats. And the stories usually culminate in finally sharing the same sweaty, small room with that band, shouting back the lyrics you fell in love with as your slightly younger self. Sound familiar? Probably.

So maybe it’s poetic justice that my story of how Jeff Rosenstock’s music brashly marched its way into my heart waves a casual middle finger to that narrative before dismantling it completely.

When I found myself gravitating towards ska-punk in high school – I didn’t go as far as to wear all-checkered-everything and sign up for skanking lessons, but an impossible number of Less Than Jake and Goldfinger songs occupied prime real estate on my iPod — I became tangentially familiar with Rosenstock’s foray into the genre with The Arrogant Sons of Bitches. I figured that, like a more punk Paul McCartney, Rosenstock just felt like filling the world with silly ska songs.

But lets bypass all the childhood nostalgia bullshit. I discovered Bomb the Music Industry! in college, in a soundproofed radio station tucked in the basement of Syracuse University’s student center. I was a freshman who wore his dorm room key on a lanyard, thought naming a fledgling radio show “Stage Dives and Sing-alongs” was cool, and trekked half a mile every Monday at 6:30 in the morning, wind whipping in my face, so I could settle into the WERW (What Everybody Really Wants!) studio for two hours and test just how soundproof those station walls were.

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[TRANSLATION] Lay - 140902 Elle Magazine Hong Kong: "If People Look Down On Him He Works Harder"

External image

Elle: Would you like to be more comprehensive and well rounded?

Lay: While keeping the things I’m good at in check, I would also like to expand on other aspects as well. For example, even though I debuted with dance, I have been working hard on piano, guitar, composing, arranging, singing, etc.

Elle: Do you think this kind of understandable, clear image is a good thing or a bad thing?

Lay: As for artists, “Art does not pressure the body” is a proverb I have always really believed in. In addition, since I’m a Libra, I tend to seek and chase after perfection and harmony, so I encourage myself a lot. I work hard to make every aspect of what I do right.

Elle: From an artist’s perspective, a comprehensive, well-roudned personality is an advantage, right?

Lay: Yes yes yes!! The mature type can, like me, showcase more things.

Elle: Is your own personality the slow type?

Lay: I don’t have the best personality. Usually I am really calm, but sometimes I can have outbursts after accumulating feelings over a long period of time, it can shock people.

Elle: If there were a good opportunity within the film industry, would you take it?

Lay: Of course, because a good acting opportunity can also help me to write music. I can also learn a lot in the film industry and make new friends, and maybe the friends I make also like music, that would be even better!

Elle: What if you were asked to write the title song?

Lay: Wow… If they accepted a song I wrote as the title song, then I wouldn’t ask for any appearence fees!

Elle: What are your goals and aspirations in music?

Lay: In terms of music, our sunbaes are already a great aspiration. I had never thought to bring Chinese music to different places, but I have thought of this: I am part of a Chinese group, but I am also from a Korean entertainment company who trained me to be an Asian star, so our promotions are around the globe. I hope that through this type of channel and bridge, there will be some sort of unity. I am giving myself 10 years of time, no, maybe 5, to lead the Chinese music industry myself. This is my biggest aspiration.

Elle: Pretend that you have returned to the Chinese music environment, and you find that it does not live up to your expectations. What do you do then?

Lay: I am very willing to accept failures, very happy to accept failures. In music, there is no right answer, there is only an approach. When the music you make: your beat, your melody, your lyrics, has two out of the three that captivates the audience, then this song is pretty much complete. You cannot possibly expect everyone to like your music, but if people can cry with you and feel your emotions after they hear the song, then it is good.

Elle: What kind of music do you usually like to listen to?

Lay: I really like to listen to the songs I compose myself. Do you want to listen? Recently, I’ve written a rap, a demo, which has a lot of ties with Chinese popular music (When the interviewer was listening to the song, Lay was there explaining the meaning of the song and also accompanied the music with his own dance moves…….)

Elle: Then, do you watch television dramas for inspiration?

Lay: I really do not have time to watch! Wasn’t ‘My Love From Another Star’ really popular? I never had time to watch that. I always thought that it was about a girl who came over from another planet, and then there was a series of events that happened.

Elle: What do you think you will be like in 5 or 10 years time?

Lay: Besides my career, it would probably be the time to find a girlfriend, right? Or marry? Hahahaha!

Elle: Then what about in terms of career?

Lay: Of course I cannot give up my career. My dream is pretty enormous, so the preparation I have to do is a lot as well. I am always accumulating and building up, because I hope to lead the Chinese music industry well.

Elle: How did you acquire and excel in your meticulous and courteous qualities?

Lay: I was raised by my grandpa and grandma since my youth, they were both teachers, so they influenced me a lot. Also, I am a person who respects my elders. When I first arrived at the company, there was a lot of etiquette. When cultures collide, it really makes one’s head hurt. In Korea, people respect and emphasize status: you have to greet and bow to people who are above you, and you can use informal language to people in a status below you. But, I have been educated in manners since I was small, so I thought that anyone and everyone who helped me, everyone who works on my behalf behind the scenes, they are all people I am grateful to, they are all people who are above me in status.
To fans, this is even more pertinent. We do not have a very direct way of communicating with them, and I have never said, “You guys are my girlfriends”, or things like that, but everyone knows that it is a feeling that wholly exists. All we really do is put on some makeup, wait in an airconditioned room, and then go on stage to perform and sweat a lot. But the fans, they probably wait from early in the morning, the day before yesterday, buy tickets more than a month before, and sometimes they even visit us at the airports, so I think that the love that our fans (who are also our friends) is worthy of respect and love. If my bow can represent thanks and respect, I hope you all don’t think I bow too much; the things you all do for us, I could bow a hundred or a thousand times and it wouldn’t be enough.

Elle: Can you tell us about your childhood?

Lay: Since young, my mother loved showing me videos of Michael Jackson; at the time the Moon Walk was really popular, and I wanted to learn it, but I couldn’t learn it no matter how hard I tried. In high school, I started to show interest in Popping, and now I am our group’s lead dancer. I think in the road I took, the most important aspect is that you have to work hard and perservere to train. I also tell my friends, no matter what field the company they’re entering is in, they have a good chance of doing well there. When I was still a trainee, I would practice over 10 hours per day, and I could also spend nights where I would not return home to sleep. My motivation was drawn from the multiple instructors who who did not approve of me for my poor results, so I had to make some good results. People who look at you with contempt can drive you to work especially harder.

Elle: What is your favorite motto in life?

Lay: Work hard, work hard, and then work harder1

Elle: Please state 3 good points about yourself

Lay: So far, I have only listed one: Gratefulness. This is absolutely truthful, but I have to think about the other ones…. I think I am a person who has talent, hahaha, and also perserverance!

Elle: Lastly, please say something for ELLE MEN’s one year anniversary!

Lay: Firstly, to be able to represent EXO and attend ELLE MEN’s photoshoot, to be able to interact with Hong Kong friends and interact with them face to face, I feel very blessed and happy. During the Hong Kong concert I really wanted to say something: Thank you so much to everyone who came to watch our concert! Thank you everyone! So I also hope that EXO will have better and more promotions, and show everyone a better side of us. I hope everyone will continue to love ELLE MEN, and continue to love EXO!2

Credit: translation: dailyexo.tumblr.com, Source: Elle Magazine. (1Note: this phrase is used in the profile of Lay’s weibo account, 2Note: said in Cantonese)

i doubt this will ever be seen… but i’m gonna try to put it all out there.  taylorswift​ today i learned some really unsettling stuff about my family and childhood.  basically, there was way more abuse between my dad and my mom than i realized and i blocked a lot of my early childhood from my memory, i remember less than i’m supposed to because it was so bad.  thank god i don’t remember though, because i don’t want to remember if it was that bad… judging by what i do remember, it’d have to be REALLY bad.

anyway… this whole thing has got me thinking about the people and things that mean a lot to me.  your music has helped me a lot to vocalize things about the abuse i’ve experienced… i remember the first time i heard dear john and felt like you ripped a page from the diary of my life… i thought of my dad.  an expert at sorry and keeping lines blurry, never impressed by me acing his tests.  that line will always mean more to me than i can explain.  it’s the essence of abuse actually… it’s really amazing that at 19 you were able to write it down in such a coherent way and release it into the world with your name on it, calling your abuser out by name in a really clever way where you could (and did) deny the name thing to protect yourself.  how brave!  i’ve always been so proud of you for that…  

but yeah, i remember singing tell me why so passionately on the bus on the way to school about my dad and a former friend of mine… this friend would tell me he loved me all the time and then insult me for fun.  he knew he hurt me, but he would do it all the time… i remember talking to a mutual friend about his abuse… and she was upset with him because he’d just said something so mean… and she sai “it’s like that line ‘you could write a bood on how to ruin someone’s perfect day’ that’s him!” and i was like “especially if he made the perfect day”  

i remember when it got real bad and my dad was in the worst mental place he’s been (i can’t elaborate in a post i want you to see because that’s too public… but if i’m chosen for loft 89, i want to tell you about this because i want you to know how much you’ve gotten me through) and he was so horrible… and i retreated to my room and would just blast mean on repeat screaming at my door “you have pointed out my flaws again as if i don’t already see them” and “i walk with my head down trying to block you out ‘cause I’ll never impress you” crying into my pillow about how i just wanted to feel ok again.  i changed the words from “about how i can’t sing” to “about how i’m nothing” because it fits so well in the song and to my specific situation… and i would just ask over and over again why he had to be so mean.

i remember the first time i heard red and was like “fighting with him was like trying to solve a crossword and realizing there’s no right answer.”  oh my god, did she just write a song about me and kyle (the friend i mentioned before)?”  and then i heard the album… and everything fell into place.  red, the album, helped me to make sense of that relationship so much.  i tried to write this giant song by song review of the album when it came out (i ended up not finishing because i ran out of steam during begin again because i wrote four full pages single spaced in my review of all too well), and it was all “this song reminds me of my friend kyle” because it was so him… from the weirdly unstable optimism of state of grace to the crushing fear and sadness of state of grace acoustic.  the entire album.  

i want to single out wanegbt because nothing satisfies me like imaging singing “we are NEVER EVER EVER getting back together” to him and watching his face… oh god… perfect.  especially with the 199 tour rock version… screaming “MUCH BETTER THAN MINE” at him would be incredible.  especially since you were a gig part of the way he abused me… at the end at least.  after high school i was lost for a bit and then taylor connect was launched at the end of 2009, and at the beginning of 2010, i found a life there.  i found friends and a support system… i found a community.  and he didn’t like that because before then, he was my community.  so he forbid me from speaking about you or anything that had to do with you.  so in this fantasy of singing wanegbt to him, “my music” is synonymous with “taylor swift” and it make it perfect.  

today, i have listened to clean all day… because my first best friend unfriended me on facebook (i corrected her on her language surrounding caitlyn jenner and apparently it wasn’t just ignorance, she meant to be transphobic and didn’t want to be friends with a trans person (me)) and i looked back on that relationship which was kind of horrible and i’m just… finally clean.  

but in my looking back at that relationship i remember walking home from the pool listening to back to december on repeat imagining she would say this to me.  i gave her all my love and all  she gave me was goodbye.  

today is just a reminder to me of how much your music has shaped my life and how grateful i am to have it.  you’ve given me words to describe the biggest and strongest emotions of my life.  most of it is applied to a completely different context, i take romantic songs and apply them to friendships or the relationship between me and my dad… and it’s so easy to do because you write the feeling so well.  so seriously, thank you for all of this and thank you for all of the music you’ve yet to write.  i’m so glad that i’ve had you in my life all these years… you’ve helped more than you could ever know…. but i needed to try and tell you.

**sorry this is so long, i started and i just couldn’t stop.  if you are reading this and you are not taylor, if you could reblog and tag her, it would mean a lot.  more than any other post i’ve written, i need her to see this.  the things i mention in this post are things i need/want her to know about… she deserves to know how much her music has helped me in standing up for myself and understanding the abuse i’ve faced.  thanks**

anonymous asked:

Mambo, I saw the AU list you reposted and I just need to tell you. The second one is an Actual Thing that happened to my sister. The Boy made a band, and wrote tragic songs about how he lost her, and they went to WARPED TOUR and performed it and just. They are now married and happy but if you write one of those please do that one. I don't even care what pairing it is. I just need it to happen. Thank you. ;_;

omfg please please i need the “this is so unfair there’s this song getting popular and the singer sounds like you and all these lyrics almost sound like they could be about me but you’re singing about lost love and you weren’t in love with me wait I’m watching the music video and crying and hey that’s definitely you wtf” au i will love you forever bro (jk i already do) - another anon

OMG @ANON 1 THAT IS AMAZING PLEASE TELL US MORE!!!!!!!! I wrote this fic, though I’m not sure fiction can beat reality in this case! (And I’m sorry about the shitty lyrics; I am the worst at rhymes.)

The song is on every time Sam turns on the goddamn radio.

I’m a jerk, you’re an ass

But God, do I miss your sass

You sat next to me and never knew

That all I thought about was you

You asked how I was

I said I was fine

Find me at the end of the line

Please find me at the end of the line

Steve hates the goddamn song.

“I don’t get it,” Sam says. “This song is great. It’s like Take Me to Church for the suburban soul.”

“That’s the whole problem,” Steve responds, mounting a painting in the Greenwich Village gallery they co-own. “It’s… familiar.” Steve finishes fiddling with the painting, making sure it’s level. He steps off of his stepladder and turns to Sam, who is giving him a look. “What?” he asks.

“Oh, nothing,” Sam says, feigning nonchalance. “Just laughing at your self-centeredness.”

Steve rolls his eyes before folding up the stepladder and stashing it behind the desk. “It’s the phrase ‘end of the line.’ I had this guy who I loved in high school. We were childhood friends.”

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counting stars chapter 2 - an agents of shield au

chapter 2 of the au where skye, ward, bobbi, lance, fitzsimmons and trip are all teenagers in high school and are friends and go on a road trip to the beach

this chapter is basically just skyeward and huntingbird but there will be fitzsimmons in the next chapter for sure as well as like ot8 secret sharing or something

also ty ty ty everyone for liking this au i love you all (most ardently xxx)

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