the light betray me

iwasapruneratfaverolles  asked:

Wait what's the story about half the boys in your grade getting your class kicked out of Disney world?

Okay, if anyone is going to read this story, you are legally required to listen to the song “Turbulence” first. Nothing will truly make sense without it. You sit your ass through the entire damn song, if you try to skimp out on it the Elder’s will find you. It’s completely vital to the full experience of this stupid ass story. This ENTIRE story exasperates me

Now, okay, so my high school senior class….was relatively a group of good kids. It was a larger grade then I was used to growing up, so I obviously didn’t know everyone in the school personally, but I could pretty much recognize everyone in my grade, and like okay, there were a lot of class clowns and trouble makers™, but for the most part, no one was really a dick and everyone was generally a Decent Person.

Then, for some ungodly reason, the song ‘turbulence’ gets released. 

Now, I think the song actually came out in like, 2011 or something, but it caused Notable Problems with my grade in particular. It was deemed our ‘CLASS SONG’, and every time it played at an event or someone just played it for fun on their phone or something, every single kid in my age group just unexplainably went crazy. You never really knew what was going to happen, and it got worse each and every year- making senior year the year of Worried Faculty, and not without reason. 

Senior Year alone, before this Disney incident happened, the song ‘turbulence’ lead directly to the slightly-violent concussion of an unwillingly crowd surfing teacher and a few freshmen at homecoming, and it was also being blasted on a blue tooth speaker when a couple of boys in my class Lowkey Very Politely High-Jacked The Plane We Were On, so, when we got to Disney World, the chaperones made sure to contact whoever was in charge of our party and told them under no circumstances was this song to be played.


So the school does a Disney trip for the seniors every year- they stay in a cheap hotel and shove four or five withering and hormonal teens in a room, they go to the parks during the day, one night they walk through Universal and see the Blue Man Group in concert, and one night they usually have a big dinner and dance party for the kids, usually held in Sea World. 

But, you know what came out when they were planning the Disney trip? Blackfish. So, the school board (and a lot of the students) were like “UMM-” and that left them scrambling to find a new location for the party. 

The Disney workers, being Disney workers, were super helpful when the school mentioned this issue when they called to make reservations, though. They were like, “Oh, this is great timing! Your school always brings such well-behaved kids every year, and we’ve been thinking about opening up our Fantasia Gardens golf course as a party location! You guys could be our first official party!” and the school was super flattered so they agreed. Disney was providing a dance floor, food, a DJ, and everything else, and it wasn’t going to really cost anything extra, so the faculty was like, Super Excited about it. They thought this was gonna be a great thing, they were the experiment to see if they would try this with other schools, it was an honor, and it meant that they had a great reputation in Disney’s opinion, so maybe they’d be open to providing the school with free/new stuff/opportunities in future years.

Now, let me tell you something- I was Kinda Fucking Miserable for most of this trip. The first day was fine, but the second day saw my friends abandoning me in Magic Kingdom with barely any explanation, so I spent all day roaming MK and Epicot alone, save for occasionally standing next to acquaintances and talking to my different-school friends in a group chat on my phone, and then later that night my friend since third grade like, got a school official and cried to her about how I had instigated a fight and that’s why I was alone all day, which is literally such bullshit and not what happened, it‘s been 3 years and I still cannot believe she actually pulled this fuckery, so even though we made up later in the week I was still pissed the fuck off for the rest of my life the trip. All of my roommates (the deserters) were walking on eggshells around me, except this one control-freak girl who tried to micromanage everything I did (even though literally none of it affected her)  and none of us realized how pissed off I was until I apparently physically threw her out of the bed while I was in a deep sleep, multiple times, and also stole her pillow. So the only person who I wasn’t Fully Done with was this tiny girl from a writing class, but she was potentially Half-Hamster, exclusively wore clothes made for seven year olds, couldn’t go on half of the rides because of her glass eye, and 99% of her conversation points was talking about all the plans she had to hang out with one of the other girls I was rooming with (who didn’t actually wanna hang out with her/got mad at me the third day there because the boy she liked was flirting with me), so like…she was sweet but I also wanna go on rides and not hear how great the girls I’m lowkey in a Blood Feud with are, you know? She wasn’t exactly prime hang out material here. So by the time we get to this party at Fantasia Gardens, we’re all lowkey pretending like everything’s fine but like. It wasn’t hard to tell there was fighting going on. And you could just look at all the other students around you and see there was also fighting going on. Shoving so many kids in hot rooms is never a good idea, like YIKE. 

Anyway, I needed something at this party to be fun. I needed to be released at this point. 

I walk into the place and immediately realize I’m a fucking outlier amongst the girls- every single girl had opted for a sundress, whilst I thought a black skirt and a nice blouse would be enough. This should not have been a problem, but hey. High School. What can ya do. (it just made me more stressed) At this point I was like, this is it, this is it, I hate literally everyone in my high school. There’s nothing holding me back. Graduation take me the fuck away. But I had to make it through this party and then one more day in Disney. 

The room was like, a barn, kind off? Or at the very least it had been decorated like one. There was barbecue food, a dance floor, a lake outside, and a mini-golf course that we were told we were allowed to use at any part of the night. The DJ was playing relatively normal dance/club music. After about an hour of strobe lights and watching people dancing, My Friend Who Hath Betrayed Me and I decided to head down to the mini-golf course. 

There were these two guys there, and I didn’t really know them but they were clearly those ‘All Our Classmates Are Beneath Us Because We’re Alternative And Like Anime And Heavy Metal Music’ types of guys. They took one look at my ass in a tight black mini-skirt and immediately started flirting with me, and on any other occasion I would have shot them down, but 1) They were both actively focused on me over my friend, who I was still mad at and 2) I was frustrated - so I started flirting back even though I wasn’t interested in the slightest (and I had petty reasoning, of course, but I was 18, it was a bad week, it was 100 degrees, give me a break. I promise 99% of the time I’m not Awful). So anyway, we get caught up in a game of mini-golf with these anti-establishment boys, who spend the entire time dissing our classmates for, like, dancing, and looking for excuses to show off in front of me/touch me. We missed like half the dance because of this. 

Right when we were finishing our game, we were contemplating going to the other golf course (I was looking for an excuse to head back to the party tbh we were literally the only four people outside it was starting to feel like the set up to a horror movie) when a girl came up and told us to head back in because the boys™ had busted out the alcohol and we only had a limited amount of time before the chaperones noticed. 

(They sold alcohol at our hotel, a bunch of people had fake id’s made before the trip for this very reason). Me and my friend didn’t actually feel like drinking but we took the excuse and the boys followed us back inside (we lost them on the dance floor and I only saw them once again that night). Anyway, we arrived to what we thought was Chaos, but was truly only the Beginning of Chaos

Right off the bat, I noticed the boys from my Gov class and the boys I knew from detention were huddled around each other, muttering under the music. That, I knew, was not gonna lead to anything good. They see me, and they’re like “Javert! Javert people trust you! Go request that the DJ play turbulence!” and I’m like. No. What are you fucking planning??? But they just keep pressing me. They would not drop it oh my God. One of my roommates overhears this, the one who’s mad at me because her crush she never talks to was slightly flirting with me earlier, and she’s in a petty™ mood so she asks why they want it to play but they still won’t tell her, just keep insisting that it has to happening. So she’s all, ‘I can get it to play’ and struts off to the DJ booth with an exaggerated ponytail snap. I’m left with these boys like. For fucks sake please don’t get anyone killed. 

A few boys break off to go tap people and let them know what’s going on. The smell of alcohol is strong. Boys are starting to discreetly take off their shoes and any valuables and hide them under the tables. The chaperones aren‘t noticing any of this. 

I broke away from the dance floor to get a soda, and one of the teachers sees me looking mildly distressed and asks if something’s wrong. And I know. I know that I have the power to kill whatever the hell is about to happen. I’m the sole person in this room that’s clued in who’s not whispering in excitement and waiting for the song to play. I still don’t even know what they’re all planning on doing, but I could end this so fast, just say the words ‘turbulence’ or ‘the boys’ or ‘senior prank’, and this would be nipped in the bud immediately. This could be over before it ever started, all because of me.

And then I reflect on how shitty my weeks been going, how I was frustrated with most of the people in the room, how I needed something fun to happen at this party to release me from hell. 

I tell the chaperone I’m fine, just getting a little tired, and they drop it and head back to the buffet line. 

I head back to the dance floor. Everyone is grinding with baited breath. 

The DJ’s voice comes over the microphone: “I hear it’s someone’s birthday tomorrow! Let’s play her favorite song!”

Turbulence begins to play.

The class goes wild, wilder than they’ve ever been before. The building may as well be shaking from all the noise and music. 

The teachers are trying to get the DJ’s attention to cut the song. He can’t hear them. 

The bass drops

Almost every boy on the dance floor screams, runs outside, rips off their shirts and jumps into the fucking lake

It was absolute PANDEMONIUM. This wasn’t even the funniest thing they could have come up with but everyone left on the dance floor was loosing their minds cracking up. The teachers and Disney workers were screaming at the top of their lungs and trying to haul boys back onto the land. 

Then the manager of Fantasia Gardens starts screaming that there are alligators in the fucking lake



A L L I G A T O R S. 


All the boys eventually make it back onto land- no one had been bitten or killed or anything, although a few apparently did see ‘shapes moving’ (it was late at night, so nothing clear), and one kid got kicked in the head and knocked out for a few moments and almost drowned, but everyone was intact. 


And like, you can’t fucking blame them. I’m sure when they were making the principal sign liability papers, they didn’t think to include ‘late night gator attacks in a lake’ on the list, they could’ve been put in serious trouble if something had happened omfg. But there was a LOT of yelling/ranting/cursing. NEVER before have they seen such inappropriate behavior, the school would not be allowed to step foot in the Fantasia Gardens EVER again, yadayada, that sort of thing. The more boys I found soaking wet, the more ridiculous this got- I knew which of them had planned it of course, but this was most of the grade. There were like, geeks and nerds and Good Kids™ who I never expected to do something like wild like this standing around half naked looking torn between proud and about-to-cry omfg.

Every single boy who participated got suspended for three days, but they had to space out which boys were suspended which days because they didn’t trust them to not throw a giant party on the days they weren’t there. 

The school is still allowed in Disney World every year, but are banned from Fantasia Gardens and received a fine. 

Turbulence’ was absolutely banned from being played at senior prom. 

while ago I saw a guy in school who wore a light yagami tee and I happened to have LABB with me so I went up to him, said ”nice shirt” and pulled out my book as if it was some kind of identification and we looked at each other like two undercover cops

She Was My Mother Pt. 4

Summary: You recognize your father, Negan, in the lineup.

Pairing: Carl Grimes x Female!Reader

Warnings: Swearing, mentions of death,

Word Count: 1,205

A/N: Part four. Not that well written, so proceed with caution.

Originally posted by fandomaddict77

Carl’s POV

I can hear my breath above the noise. Taking his hand was a sign of defeat. The last time nervousness like this resonated within me was when Y/N’s shirt fell to her feet and I didn’t know where to put my hands. I can feel my nose scrunch, whether it was from the image of her underneath me or the sound of her screaming in the bed of that truck, I’m not sure. Enid’s lips on mine was a reality I enjoyed, one I still think of, but the pain of knowing that the man that caused all the pain brought to us raised Y/N stings.

“Dwighty-Boy, why don’t you grab Daryl, take him to the kitchen, do a little grub prep. New plan boys. Let’s burn the dead, unload the truck later.” With the orders of Negan flowing from his mouth, I take the opportunity to reach down and grab my hat layered with a new coat of dirt.

“Damn, I am not gonna have time to fuck any of my wives today. I mean, maybe one.” Daryl’s a lamb, only now have I ever seen him genuinely frightened - torn in half by god knows. The thought of Y/N the same way, broken by the force of her father crosses my mind, and I don’t know whether to feel remorse for her or turn a blind eye and shake my head knowing that any daughter of a monster deserves this fate.

“What are you gonna do to me?” The question stands in the air as he turns around, the palm of his hand pressed against his forehead.

“Number one, do not shatter my image of you. You’re a fuckin’ badass. You’re not scared of shit - don’t be scared of me - it’s a disappointment. Number two, you really want me to ruin the surprise?”

He looks me in the eye, placing a hand on the back of my shoulder. He pushes me forward, up the stairs and through the industrial door, the light fading as it closed. Before me was a crowd of people, survivors, if you will. Negan just smirked and came close to my ear, whispering, “Check this out.” He proceeded to step forward up to the rails, everyone taking a knee for him.

“The Saviors have gone out into the world and fought the dead and come back with some really good stuff. Some of that stuff can be yours if you work hard and play by the rules. Today, everybody gets fresh vegetables at dinner. No points needed.” This seems to please everyone. Patrons applaud Negan as if he were doing them a favor, standing as he turns to face me. I glance once over the crowd, finding myself looking for her. I know in the back of my mind that she’d never kneel for him, but the sound of her repeating “dad” floats around in space, and I turn back to him and make eye contact again. “You see that?” He says in a smug voice, leaning with his back against the rails.

“Respect. Cool, huh? They still on their knees?” There’s something lingering in the air, a revolting feeling that everyone in the room appreciates him, the same man who pummeled the heads in of my friends - family - without hesitation, with pleasure.

“As you were!” I stand there for a moment, watching them move. Negan’s voice pipes up from the front of me, and I follow behind him like a dog, although I’d hate to admit it to anyone back at Alexandria. He walks me down a big hall, talking lightly and chuckling when I hear “wives” spat out from underneath his breath. We turn into a room, women in every nook. They all dress in black, eye contact avoided when we enter the room.

“I know,” Negan says, bumping me with his shoulder as if he could read my mind or were telling me a joke like old buddies at a bar. “Every woman where you’re from dresses like they do the books at an auto shop. You’re gonna wanna look at their titties.” A small scoff is hidden in the back of my throat, one which he can tell.

“It’s cool. I won’t mind, they won’t mind. Knock yourself out. Better than thinking of you fucking my daughter now, ain’t that right?” Feelings of nervousness and scorn rise within me as he pulls aside on of the girls from the couch. I can still see what her breasts look like cupped in the palm of my hands, and what it felt like when she squirmed and bucked against me. That night under the trees and caught in the headlights was the night the memory of her decayed. A beer bottle is given to me, clenched in my hand, and I think of where she would be. It concerned me that I could still feel the beating of her heart against my chest and smell the lavender in her air, even after it came to light the demon she had hid from me.

“Y/N betrayed us, Carl. She let them die.”


“How you holdin’ up kiddo?”

“Out of the way, I need to talk to him.” He taught me to put conviction behind my voice when I was seven and the kids at school called me names for sitting in the front of the class and staying in during recess instead of playing kickball in the yard.

“I’m not asking, Ry. Don’t make this hard.” Ry sighs, dropping his bloated pushed up chest, taking a step back. After arriving here, I soon realized that I would be held at high regards, same as my father, which meant that the Saviors would listen and do what I asked in fear of offended me or Negan, and the survivors would keep close eyes on me by instruction of my dad. Everyday feels like the first day of school and the last day on earth, uncomfortable and on edge constantly.

When the door opens, he’s sitting. That bat leaning against the cushion of the couch, the wires pressing against it as if it threatened to tear. He towers over someone, with a smirk tugging at the edges of his lips and a fire in his eyes that can only be associated with either anger or intrigue. His attention strays from the moment between the flanneled mystery to the sound of the door swinging open - me.

“This day just keeps getting better, don’t it?”

A puzzled expression forms on my face, and Carl. He stands there without the wrap on his eye, teeth gritted slightly. Negan’s smirk turns to a smile, and he stands back as Carl takes a step forward. I can’t tell if it’s anger or sadness on his face when he comes within inches of my face. The gouging hole where his eye should be never came unwrapped, all but one night that I remember. He cried that night, and we loved like adults who stay together. And now, looking at him and knowing how much he must hate me, and how he blames me could drive me to break bread with a monster and become one myself.


@ lfsbitencourt @ daddys-little-mosher  @1-2-3-my-name-is-oli @michonve 

i have a fic i should be working on instead but this popped into my head and it wouldn’t go away so i present to you stozier college!au with soccer player stan and theater major richie

  • this is an au where most of the losers met in college with a few exceptions
  • mike, stan, and eddie grew up together, played soccer together and all went to the same college when they were offered scholarships ( their hometown always said that it was because of them that they won the championships all four years the boys were in high school ), they even get an apartment together to make thing easier
  • that’s when they meet bill because they have on extra place and it doesn’t take long for bill to fit right in
  • richie didn’t meet any of the losers until he came to college but he had to take a literature class his first semester and that’s where he met ben and they hit it off immediately
  • ben introduced him to beverly and they became a trio who got along fantastically. richie and bev always found a chance to smoke between classes and richie was good at getting ben to come out of his shell more and to be a little less shy ( bev had already made a lot of progress in that regard but richie is loud and out there so he was able to push ben the rest of the way out of his shell )
  • richie and bill meet during a theater production. richie and bill actually compete for the lead but bill ends up getting the part and richie plays the goofy sidekick and he’s honestly amazing at it. everyone loves him. ( he gets more serious parts as well as the years go on and he likes them but he finds that he enjoys playing the goofy characters more because then he gets to do fun voices and channel all of his excess energy)
  • stan see’s richie for the first time when he’s performing, mike and eddie had pulled him away from studying to go watch bill perform (stan considers bill one of his best friends, maybe even closer with him than he is with mike and eddie but he also knows that mike and eddie are trying to find a way for the three of them to be in a relationship, they both bring him roses at the end of the performance)
  • stan finds that he laughs every time that richie is on stage, his eyes are glued to him. he’s gangly and awkward like he never quite grew into his limbs and his hair is slicked back for the part but there’s something oddly charming about it
  • cut to after the show, mike and eddie are surrounding bill and giving him his roses so stan approaches richie once his own fans have separated a bit
  • stan actually hesitates for a moment because the gel had started to come out of richie’s hair and he just looks unbelievably adorable and dorky
  • the hesitation stops when richie looks at him and winks, “do i have a shy admirer over there? i don’t bite…unless you’re into that. you look like you’d be into that.”
  • stan scoffs and rolls his eyes before telling richie that he was amazing in the show and that he’s half tempted to watch it again just for his performance
  • richie is about to respond with a witty one liner ( read as: cheesy ) that he’s sure will get him stan’s number when bev and ben are approaching and giving richie hugs and congratulating him. inviting him out to dinner for a post show celebration and richie gets caught up in the moment of being with his best friends that by the time he looks back over to where stan had been standing, the curly haired boy had made his way back over to his friend and they were leaving
  • his heart drops completely into his stomach and he can’t quite explain why. he hadn’t even learned the boys name, just seen how incredibly handsome he was. 
  • he definitely starts lusting after him and stalks through half the schools instagram trying to find him but they go to a huge college and, again, richie doesn’t even have his name
  • sometimes he gets glimpses of stan at the shows that bill is also in but the boy never approaches him like he did that first time and richie never has time to approach him because he has to talk to all the people that come to support him. he actually does have people who call themselves his fans.
  • it’s a year later when bev invites him to come to a soccer game. she had been talking to bill in class and he wanted to go support his boyfriends and his roommate/best friend and didn’t want to go alone.
  • bev agrees and then invites ben and richie to come as well
  • richie has been so proud of himself for never going to a sports game in all of his years at college but bev somehow casually drops that stan is on the team and is bill’s roommate (not one of bill’s boyfriends though)
  • “your story wouldn’t be as romantic if i helped you”
  • he turns to ben with puppy dog eyes “did you know about this too, benny boy? how could you, the true love and light of my life, betray me like this” ben pushes richie away and laughs when he tries to put an arm around him but he does apologize for not saying anything.
  • flash forward to the next day when they all go to the game. they’re all dressed in light blue ( that’s the color the team wears ), and bill is on his feet as soon as all the starting players are announced ( stan, mike, and eddie are all starting players )
  • all that richie can think about is LEGS
  • stan’s legs look damn GOOD in that uniform
  • he ends up cheering just as loudly as bill despite the fact that he doesn’t really know what’s going on
  • their school’s team ends up winning and richie is screaming “YEAH WE FUCKING WON FUCK YOU GUYS” and other obscenities until bev finally puts a hand over his mouth when they get a warning look from a parent sitting a couple of seats away
  • ben is laughing so hard he can barely stand up
  • they meet up with the guys after and they’re all sweaty and gross after playing but richie doesn’t hesitate to stride forward and use his hands to smoosh stan’s cheeks. “i am in love with you.”
  • stan rolls his eyes and is glad that it’s easy to hide his grin when his face is smooshed, harder to his his blush though
  • richie is suddenly really into soccer after this. ben and bev don’t always tag along but bill always wants to support mike and eddie so they usually carpool to the away games
  • everyone is waiting for stan and richie to officially get together but all they do is banter and flirt and the other’s are so annoyed with their nonsense 
  • their first kiss happens after a game one night, richie offers to walk stan home because the other boy always took ages in the showers and his roommates were getting sick of waiting for them. stan doesn’t seem disappointed to walk out and see richie waiting for him and they fall into step beside each other easily enough.
  • richie is feeling oddly sentimental, “how come you never talked to me again?”
  • “what?”
  • “after the first performance, how come you never spoke to me again?”
  • stan seems surprised by the question, just shrugging.
  • “c’mon stanley. were you too intimidated by my devilish good looks?”
  • “the first thought i had when i saw you was ‘this guy is a complete dork’“ which isn’t entirely true but it shuts richie up for a moment while stan thinks about it.
  • “after that you always seemed to have fans surrounding you and while i do consider myself a richie tozier fan, i didn’t want you to think of me that way.”
  • richie is an idiot so he ignores everything except, “you’re a fan of me?”
  • “i just said that, idiot.”
  • richie is about to say more, probably tease stan, when stan pushes him up against the wall and presses their lips together. effectively shutting richie up.
  • the kiss lasts until they both need to pull away for air and richie’s hair is slightly messy from stan running his fingers through it and now they’re both grinning like idiots
  • somehow they’re still not dating
  • stan goes to every single one of richie’s shows even if it means seeing the same production ten times and richie goes to every soccer game.
  • championships come around and stan spends more time training and gets all stressed over it and one night richie finally gets him to sit down so they can watch star wars together or something and stan looks like he wants to say something all night but everytime richie asks he just gets brushed off
  • they don’t see each other over the next three days and stan seems to be avoiding richie but richie still goes with all of their other friends to watch the championship game
  • it’s tense, both teams are crazy talented.
  • things get worse when there ten minutes left in the game and someone collides with stan when going after the ball.
  • stan’s cry of agony is audible to everyone when he crumples on to the field, clutching his leg.
  • ben and bill have to restrain richie from running onto the field
  • eddie and mike end up having to carry stan off the field and the game continues while the on-site medics provide icepacks ( there are plans to get him to the hospital after the game, stan refuses to leave during such an important game. it’s bad for team morale he says even though he’s crying )
  • their team wins and richie finally bolts until he gets to stan’s side just as they’re about to help him to the ambulance
  • “are you his family? close relative?” the paramedics ask
  • richie is about to say no, that they’re just really close friends when stan speaks up voice strained. “he’s my boyfriend.”
  • that’s enough for the paramedics and they get stan into the ambulance and richie hops in beside him, immediately taking his hand.
  • they’re quiet for a bit, “boyfriend, huh?”
  • stan groans, “i was going to ask you the other night but i didn’t want you to say no. this game was coming up and you’re my good luck charm and i don’t think i would have been able to handle the rejection. i don’t want to be just friends with you, richie.”
  • “i figured that out when you kissed me.”
  • stan is staring at him blank faced and richie sighs, “stan, i’ve wanted to be with you since the first time we spoke. you can ask beverly if you don’t believe me.”
  • there’s no response as stan pulls richie down for a kiss, it ends up being very messy with how much the two of them are smiling
  • richie holds stan’s hand as he gets his leg checked, he stays with him for moral support when he finds out that he’s going to need surgery to fix it, he sticks around when stan gets frustrated with physical therapy and just wants to give up even though they both know it’s his dream to play professionally.
  • richie is there when, a year later, stan is finally back out on the field doing what he loves. after all of this time richie still stares at stan’s legs for a majority of the game.
  • it’s his last performance of his college career when stan approaches him immediately after the performance. usually he would wait until all of richies fans had cleared out ( the number had grown throughout the years ) but this time it’s like he’s on a mission
  • richie can’t help but fear the worst. stan is going to break up with him, all of their plans to move out to california and get an apartment together were going to be ruined.
  • “you look like a dork.” stan’s voice is incredibly fond.
  • richie’s smile is shaky, “you love my horrible fashion sense.”
  • “i do.”
  • and then stan is dropping down on to one knee and all of the people around them have started to squeal when stan pulls out the ring box and looks up at richie.
  • “richie tozier, will you marry me?”
✭ ✮ Linkin Park || Hybrid Theory Starters ✮✭


  • Paranoia’s all I got left.
  • I don’t know what stressed me first–or how the pressure was fed.
  • But I know just what it feels like to have a voice in the back of my head.
  • It’s like a face that I hold inside–A face that awakes when I close my eyes–
  • A face that watches every time I lie–A face that laughs every time I fall!
  • So I know that when it’s time to sink or swim.
  • That the face inside is hearing me right underneath my skin!
  • It’s like I’m paranoid lookin’ over my back
  • It’s like a whirlwind inside of my head.
  • It’s like I can’t stop what I’m hearing within–!
  • It’s like the face inside is right beneath my skin!
  • Your paranoia’s probably worse!
  • I don’t know what set me off first but I know what I can’t stand? Everybody acts like the fact of the matter is I can’t add up to what you can.
  • The sun goes down and I feel the light betray me–!

                                        One Step Closer

  • I cannot take this anymore!
  • I’m saying everything I’ve said before!
  • All these words they make no sense…
  • I find bliss in ignorance.
  • The less I hear the less you’ll say–but you’ll find that out anyway!
  • Just like before…Everything you say to me takes me one step closer to the edge– I’m about to break!!
  • I need a little room to breathe cause I’m one step closer to the edge!
  • I find the answers aren’t so clear and I wish I could find a way to disappear.❞ 

                                         With You

  • I woke up in a dream today to the cold of the static and put my cold feet on the floor–I forgot all about yesterday.
  • I’m remembering I’m pretending to be where I’m not anymore.
  • A little taste of hypocrisy and I’m left in the wake of the mistake, slow to react.
  • So even though you’re so close to me–you’re still so distant and I can’t bring you back.
  • It’s true the way I feel as promised by your face.
  • The sound of your voice is painted on my memories.
  • Even if you’re not with me, I’m with you.
  • I hit you and you hit me back– the rest of the day stood still.
  • When things go wrong I pretend the past isn’t real.
  • Now I’m trapped in this memory.
  • No matter how far we’ve come–I can’t wait to see tomorrow.

                                         Points of Authority

  • Forfeit the game before somebody else takes you out of the frame and puts your name to shame!
  • Cover up your face–you can’t run the race–the pace is too fast and you just won’t last.
  • You love the way I look at you while taking pleasure in the awful things you put me through.
  • You take away if I give in.
  • My life, my pride is broken.
  • You like to think you’re never wrong–but you’ve lived what you’ve learned.
  • You have to act like you’re someone and you want someone to hurt like you.
  • You want to share what you have been through.
  • You love the things I say I’ll do–the way I hurt myself again just to get back at you!


  • Crawling in my skin, these wounds they will not heal!
    Fear is how I fall–confusing what is real–!
  • There’s something inside me that pulls beneath the surface–consuming, confusing..
  • This lack of self-control I fear is never ending.
  • I can’t seem…to find myself again.
  • Without a sense of confidence and I’m convinced that there’s just too much pressure to take.
  • I’ve felt this way before–so insecure!
  • Discomfort endlessly has pulled itself upon me–distracting, reacting.
  • Against my will I stand beside my own reflection..


  • A constant wave of tension–on top of broken trust–the lessons that you taught me I learned were never true.
  • I find myself in question–they point the finger at me again.
  • Guilty by association–you point the finger at me again!

  • I wanna run away and never say goodbye.
  • I wanna know the truth instead of wondering why.
  • I wanna know the answers–no more lies.
  • I wanna shut the doors and open up my mind.

  • Another wave of tension has more than filled me up.
  • All my talk of taking action–these words were never true.
  • i wanna run away and open up my mind.

                                              By Myself

  • What do I do to ignore them behind me?
  • Do I follow my instincts blindly?
  • Do I hide my pride from these bad dreams–and give in to sad thoughts that are maddening?
  • Do I sit here and try to stand it?
  • Or do I try to catch them red-handed?
  • Do I trust some and get fooled by phoniness, or do I trust nobody and live in loneliness?
  • Because I can’t hold on when I’m stretched so thin–I make the right moves but I’m lost within.
  • I put on my daily facade but then–I just end up getting hurt again–By myself.
  • I can’t hold on to anything, watching everything spin–with thoughts of failure sinking in!
  • If I turn my back I’m defenseless.
  • To go blindly seems senseless.
  • If I hide my pride and let it all go on then they’ll take from me ‘till everything is gone.
  • If I let them go I’ll be outdone, but if I try to catch them I’ll be outrun.
  • If I’m killed by the questions like a cancer, then I’ll be buried in the silence of the answer. By myself.
  • How do you think I’ve lost so much?
  • I’m so afraid that I’m out of touch.
  • How do you expect… I will know what to do–when all I know Is what you tell me to.

                                            In The End

  • It starts with one thing and I don’t know why because It doesn’t even matter how hard you try.
  • All I know–time is a valuable thing–watch it fly by as the pendulum swings.
  • Watch it count down to the end of the day–the clock ticks life away–It’s so unreal.
  • I kept everything inside and even though I tried, it all fell apart..
  • I tried so hard–and got so far, but in the end it doesn’t even matter.
  • I had to fall to lose it all.
  • But in the end it doesn’t even matter.
  • I tried so hard in spite of the way you were mocking me–acting like I was part of your property!
  • Remembering all the times you fought with me–I’m surprised it got so far.
  • Things aren’t the way they were before.
  • You wouldn’t even recognize me anymore–not that you knew me back then.
  • But it all comes back to me–in the end.

                                              A Place for My Head

  • I watch how the moon sits in the sky in the dark night–shining with the light from the sun.
  • And the sun doesn’t give light to the moon assuming that the moon’s gonna owe it one.
  • It makes me think of how you act for me–you do favors and then rapidly just turn around and start asking me about things that you want back from me.
  • I’m sick of the tension, sick of the hunger– SICK OF YOU ACTING LIKE I OWE YOU THIS!!
  • Find another place to feed your greed while I find a place to rest.
  • I want to be in another place.
  • I hate when you say you don’t understand–you’ll see it’s not mean to be.
  • I want to be in the energy, not with the enemy–a place for my head.
  • Maybe someday I’ll be just like you and step on people like you do and run away  the people I thought I knew!
  • I remember back then who you were–you used to be calm, used to be strong–used to be generous but you should’ve known that you’d wear out your welcome.
  • And now you see how quiet it is, all alone.


  • At the core I’ve forgotten–the middle of my thoughts.
  • Taken far from my safety–the picture is there .
  • The memory won’t escape me..but why should I care?
  • There’s a place so dark you can’t see the end, the skies cock back and shock that which can’t defend.
  • The rain then sends dripping an acidic question–forcefully, the power of suggestion.
  • Then with the eyes shut, looking thought the rust and rot–And dust– a small spot of light floods the floor.
  • Light pours over the rusted world of pretend.
  • The eyes ease open and its dark again.
  • In the memory you’ll find me with my eyes burning up.
  • The darkness holds me tightly until the sun rises up.
  • Moving all around–the screaming of the ups and downs is pollution manifested in perpetual sound .
  • My memory now is like the picture was then–when the paper’s crumpled up it can’t be perfect again.

                                            Pushing Me Away

  • I’ve lied to you the same way that I always do–this is the last smile that I’ll fake for the sake of being with you.
  • Everything falls apart–even the people who never frown eventually break down.
  • The sacrifice of hiding in a lie is that everything has to end.
  • You’ll soon find we’re out of time left to watch it all unwind.
  • The Sacrifice is never knowing why I never walked away, why I played myself this way.
  • Now I see, you’re testing me–and it pushes me away.
  • I’ve tried like you to do everything you wanted too.
  • This is the last time I’ll take the blame for the sake of being with you.

I just saw someone on twitter complaining about Thor: Ragnarok bc “it looks like Marvel is only making comedies now” and they “miss winter soldier style” like dude… dude… no.


“He is the closest person to me in this whole world. He is the man I will always forgive, always trust. The one man I would never, ever lie to.“

With shaking fingernails I grip deep into my thighs. The fluorescent light buzzes loudly on my skull. As I feel my body betray me, the pain whips through my core and snakes through the bones. I can feel the venom mixing and licking up my blood. How strange that such pain and torment are caused by such a gentle touch and caress. How love can trick your body and make you sick. Every pulse of pain is worth each kiss you placed upon it.
—  3.12.15 I wrote this about my constant UTIS

anonymous asked:

🌟 🌟 for Hawke and 🌟 🌟 for warden?

For every “★” I get, I will post a fact about my characters.

who is this canon teagan?

Olivier Hawke

★ Purple/Red Mage Hawke who played to her own sense of justice, but leaned towards helping out mages when she could. Ended up romancing Isabela and Merrill. Hawke and Sebastian were also great friends.

★ She became the Viscountess of Kirkwall because everyone was too afraid to tell her no. For the brief period of time she was in charge, she ran the Templars of Kirkwall into the ground so hard that Cullen lost his job and they finally ran Hawke out when they caught onto what she was doing. She chilled out in Starkhaven until Varric sent word for her to show up at Skyhold.

Arabella “Ara” Tabris

★ Tabris was set on sacrificing herself during the Fifth Blight, but Morrigan convinced Alistair otherwise. After she was finally reunited with Morrigan, they left through the Eluvian together.

★ Ding-donged the dragon gong and punched the dragon to death.

Brad Simpson Smut


I walked out of the airport, looking around to see the face I had to miss for way too long. I turned around as I heard my name being called. There he was, my best friend, Tristan Evans. I had known Tristan since we were toddlers. Our moms became best friends, so we hung out almost every week, but when I was 20 I moved away to Chicago for work.

I smiled as I walked over to give him a hug. He hugged me back before giving me a kiss on my forehead. We stood there for about a minute before we pulled back. 

“I missed you,” He spoke before putting my luggage in the trunk of his car. We both got into his car before I answered him.

“I missed you too,” I smiled as he started the car, “How have you been? With the band and stuff like that?”

“Really good, everythings going alright,” He smiled. I loved how happy he was when he spoke about the band and music. He loved his job and he loved music. I was more than happy for him to be able to fullfill his dreams.

“Look, I don’t want to make this awkward, but Brad is staying at ours for a while,” He spoke as we stopped at a red light. My body tensed up when that name came out of his house. Brad and I used to date, but we broke up when I told him I was moving to Chicago. Let’s just say it wasn’t a good breakup. 

“No, that’s okay,” I lied, turning my gaze to the passing cars.

Tristan opened the door to his apartment that he shared with Anastasia. I walked through the door, being greeted by two arms who wrapped themselves around my neck. I laughed before pulling my best friend into the most thight hug ever. 

“It’s good to have you back,” Anastasia said, before pulling away from the hug. I smiled before following her into the living room. I looked around but there was no sign of Brad, “Brad’s not here, he’s out for dinner with his girlfriend,” She assured me. As much as I know those words shouldn’t have hurt me, but they did. 

“Your suitcases are in your room,” Tristan spoke as he entered the room, placing a kiss on Anastasia’s lips. I thanked him before sitting down on the sofa.

“So, how are things on the love side?” He asked, before sitting down next to me. I smiled, holding up my hand and showing my engagement ring.

“No way!” Anastasia squeeled, taking my hand in hers, “He proposed!?” He as in Andrew, my boyfriend, well fiancé.

“He did,” I laughed, “I’m really excited,” As much as I knew that was a lie, I couldn’t say anything else but that. Don’t get me wrong, I love Andrew, but he’s not … He’s not Brad. 

“Well congratulations,” Tristan said, before kissing my cheek.

I laid on the bed in the second guest room, when I heard noice coming from the hallway. I frowned as I listened closely, but I couldn’t figure out what it was. I stood up, slowly opening my door as I heard laughter in the kitchen. As I approached it, I recognized the laughter. His laughter. I turned the corner and saw him kissing, who I guessed was his new girlfriend. When I was about to turn around, not being able to watch, they pulled away and she saw me.

“Oh, hello,” She smiled at me, making Brad turn around too. His eyes widened a bit when he saw me, but I avoided his face as I smiled at the girl.

“Hi, I’m sorry I was just getting some water,” I lied, “I didn’t want to disturb you two,” I said as I walked past them to get a water bottle from the fridge.

“Well, I’m Alexis,” The girl introduced herself as I turned around. I shook her hand, glancing at Brad for a moment, before deciding to introduce myself aswell.

“Y/N,” I said, before walking out of the kitchen, glancing one more time at Brad before going back to my room.

About an hour after I was still awake, thinking about life, about Brad and Andrew. The minute I saw Brad, I fell right back in love with him. I can’t marry Andrew, it wouldn’t be right. Not to him nor me and weirdly enough I feel like I’m betraying Brad if I marry him. A light knock pulled me from my thought as I told whoever knocked to come in.

“Hi,” He spoke, closing the door behind him. I turned on the lamp that was placed on the nighstand next to the bed. I eyed him from head to toe and back up. He hadn’t changed a thing.

“Hi,” I whispered back as he stood on the other side of the room. My voice came out so soft that I wasn’t sure if he heard me, “Shouldn’t you be with Alexis?” I asked after an uncomfortable silence.

“She went home,” He spoke, walking over to my bed. I sat up so that he could take a seat, “What are you doing here?” He asked when he sat down. I was a bit taken aback by his question as it came out a little harsh.

“Tristan and Anastasia invited me, I didn’t know you were staying here,” I told him, looking down at my fingers who were picking at my nails. 

“If you had known if I was here, would you still have come?” He asked, lifting up my chin with his finger so that I was looking at him, “Honestly, please.”

“Of course, our breakup has nothing to do with them,” I told him, placing my hand on his to get it of my ching. His eyes travelled at my ring finger as he saw the engagement ring. I quickly pulled my hand away from his view.

“You’re engaged?” He asked in disbelief. I looked at the other side of the room.

“Yeah,” I shrugged, “To Andrew.” His head shot up when he heard the name. He looked at me with a shocked expression. You see, about a year ago, I found out that Andrew cheated on me. I got drunk and called Brad to tell him about it, he was furious, but he was even more angry when I told him that Andrew threw a vase at me for confronting him about it.

“Are you kidding me!?” He asked in disbilief, his mouth hung open in shock. I looked down, shaking my head.

“No, I love him. Whatever he did to me, it’s over,” I said, looking up to meet his eyes with mine, “You don’t have to worry about me, Brad. We broke up remember?”

“You can’t marry him,” He stated, taking my hand in his, “I know you don’t want to,” His eyes pleaded me to break the wedding off, but what if I did? What would happen after that? Me and him would get happy and get married?

“Of course I do,” I lied, avoiding his eyes, knowing that he would see right through me, “Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t marry him?” He looked away from me when I said that. I knew he wouldn’t say it, say that he still loved me, it was stupid to think that he would confess it.

“Because,” He started, his eyes meeting mine again, “I can love you better than him, I would never hurt you,” He said, bringing his hand to my face, carressing my cheek with his thumb. I leaned into his thouch. He brought his face closer to mine as he leaned his forehead against mine. I could feel his warm breath against my lips, making me want to feel them against mine again, even if it was the last time.

“Than show me,” I breathed out and with that he closed the gap between us. Our lips moving in sync as he pushed me down on the bed. His left hand ran up and down my side, slipping underneed my shirt as his right one remained on my cheek. I ran my hands through his brown locks, pulling them now and then. He slipped his tongue into my mouth as he grinded his crotch against my core, making me even more frustrated. We pulled away from each to catch our breath.

“Let’s take this off,” He whispered, before taking my engagement ring off. He placed kiss on my hand before placing one on my lips. I flipped us over so I was on top, straddling him. I pulled my shirt over my head. His eyes travelled to my chest as his hands moved from my hips to my breasts, cupping them. I smiled before leaning down again and placing my lips back on his. I grinded myself against his crotch and felt him harden underneath me, making me blush.

“I missed you,” He breathed out as I moved my lips to his neck, leaving open mouth kisses and hickies all over the place, marking him as mine, even though he wasn’t mine.

“I missed you too,” I said, placing a soft kiss on his lips before he flipped us back over so he was back on top. His lips went from mine to my bellybutton, leaving kisses along the way. I pushed his sweat pants of with my feet as he flung them across the room with his foot. He lips stopped at the waistband of my panties as he looked up at me through his eyelashes. I nodded as he pulled them off. His hands running up and down my thighs. I pulled him back up and pulled him in for a kiss as my hands pushed his boxers off. I reached for my purse which was sitting next to the bed. I pulled out a condom and handed it to Brad. He laughed, placing a kiss on my forehead.

“Eager are we?” He chuckled, making me roll my eyes.

“Very,” I teased, sending him a wink as he ripped the package open and rolled the condom over his lenght. He hovered over me, his eyes looking into mine.

“Ready?” He asked, his thumb carressing my cheeck. I smiled, nodding before he pushed himself into me. I bit my lip, biting back a moan as he let us both adjust to the feeling. 

“Brad, please move,” I pleaded, grabbing onto his bicep. He nodded before rocking his hips against mine. Our boddies fitting perfectly together as we moaned in sync. His lips found mine again as he picked up his pace. He pulled away and hid his face in the crook of my neck as I nuzzled mine in his. His groans filled the room as I tried to keep them in by biting my lip. His lips placed soft kisses on my neck every now and than, making me even weaker than before. My nails ran down his back, definitely leaving scratch marks, as he went even faster.

“I’m close,” He breathed out before placing a small kiss on my lips.

“Me too,” I whispered, before we both released at the same time. He road out our orgasms, before laying down next to me, panting just like me. He turned to face me. He nose nuzzling mine as his eyes stared into mine.

“I love you,” He spoke softly, keeping his gaze on me. I looked into his eyes, seeing that he meant it and didn’t just say it in the moment. A smile painted on my lips as I placed a kiss on his lips.

“I love you too, Bradley.”

Hope you enjoyed it! Feel free to request something if you want!

There Was Something In My Aunt’s Basement

When Aunt Norma asked me to house sit, I was hesitant. She lived in a large, old Victorian set out in the woods, the kind of place that gave me the chills just driving by. The thought of being alone inside of it, surrounded by her antiques and hunting trophies, had beads of nervous sweat breaking out across my forehead. When I told Dad that I was thinking of saying no, that I was uncomfortable, he scoffed at me.

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