the kiss may have ~exposed the harsh reality of him falling in love

Our Life in Headlines//H.S

Hello Loves!!! OMG it’s been too long! Is everyone still breathing? You okay? I know I was completely shook after all the videos from last night. But here we are. And with a request fulfilled! Sorry for my super long absence! Midterms have been kicking my butt. This little story kind of got away from me but I hope you like it. As always, my masterlist is linked in my bio and requests are still open. (even thought they may take me a bit to fulfill!) I love you all!! XR

“Harry Styles and Y/N getting cozy at The Grammy’s After Party? Is love in the air?”

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how much i love you [connor murphy x reader] [smut]

requested// ‘connor murphy and reader are playing mario kart and smoking pot and all of the sudden they start talking and connor confesses how shitty he feels and the reader shows him how much she loves him and smuttttt’



word count; 2,262

tw; smuTTT, handjobs, blowjobs, SMUTT, depressionzz, weedddszzz, self harm, unprotected sex

You and Connor didn’t get high together all that often. In fact, neither of you got high all that often. Connor would sometimes get emotional when he got high, and he would sometimes fall into his old suicidal and self destructive patterns that had never really left, but gotten controlled. 

In all honesty, the only reason it was under control and there were far less incidents with blades and pills was you. Because he loved you, and he couldn’t stand the idea of leaving you, so he stopped. For the most part, of course there were nights where he felt like the whole world was crumbling at his feet, but the feeling of your heartbeat on his chest made everything whole again. You were the super glue to all of his broken pieces. 

But sometimes, when he was under the influence, he forgot about that glue. The last time he got high, he ended up cutting himself pretty bad, and you had made him vow to never get high by himself again. These kind of things never happened when you were both together, so you didn’t see the issue in getting a little high together. 

So one Sunday afternoon, after you had slept over at Connor’s the night before, you were both home alone. His parents and Zoe were out at lunch with church friends, which Connor thinks is bullshit because they are far from the perfect little Christian family they tried to be. They stopped trying to get him to go a couple of months ago. You had woken up rather late, so you had both decided to just chill out in your pajamas, which to you was your underwear and one of Connor’s sweatshirts. You had had come to an agreement that since you were together, and you’d just do shit like play Mario Kart, you could get high, but not too high. 

After you shared a rather small joint, you had put Mario Kart in the game system, you were sitting on the ground by the foot of Connor’s bed, your legs tangled with one another, your head on his shoulder. You both kind of sucked, but you didn’t care. You both kept falling off of the sides, taking like twenty minutes just to finish one race. You both didn’t mind at all, you were with one another, and though reality was a little bit distorted, you were glad you were with Connor. 

“I love you.” You muttered, tilting your head to press a little kiss on his jaw. She pulled away a little, just grumbling in response. You didn’t like that, usually he would at least say he loved you back. Usually, you’d pout a bit, hoping he’d say he was sorry or eventually say it back, and if he didn’t you’d get over it at some point. But you had a little bit of courage put in your system, so you pulled the controller out of his hand, placing both yours and his on the carpeted floor, then proceeding to climb into his lap, straddling him, your hands placed on his neck. You felt his whole body tense up, and he didn’t even put his arms around you. He kept his palms down on the floor, flattened. “Connor, what’s wrong?” You whispered, trailing your hands down his bare chest. 

“Can you get off of me?” He snapped, not doing anything to get you off of him except for his harsh words that stung more than a slap. 

“Honey, please.” You whined, pressing your lips to his neck this time.You expected one of the two extremes, either him to push you off and start getting upset, or start to get super into it, leading to some rather sloppy sex. Neither happened. He just sat there, not touching you or even letting out the little noises that he usually would whenever you would kiss his neck. 

“Get off of me.” He demanded, this time a little less mean, but more forceful. You felt your heart start to break a little more, but then you knew what was going on. You knew you shouldn’t have let him get high, you knew you should have just gone out to lunch or done literally anything else but let Connor get high. You should have known this was going to happen. 

“Please, tell me what’s wrong.” You quickly pulled your lips from his skin, making sure you weren’t touching him anywhere but where you were sitting. You saw his exterior crack, and you knew he was about to spill. 

“You don’t fucking love me, you can’t! I’m such a fucking waste of space, I can’t fucking do anything right. You’re so god damn pretty, and I look like a fucking rat, and you are so talented and lovely and what the fuck can I do other than paint some fucking flowers and…” He started to trail off, and you saw the tears start to prick in the corners of his eyes. It completely broke your heart. You pressed tiny kisses all over his face, resting your hands against his neck again. This time, his rather large hands rested on your considerably smaller waist. 

“I love you…” You started, moving your lips back down to his neck, starting to hear those little whimpers and moans you loved so much. “so much.” You continued, starting to suck a little on his neck, for sure leaving a deep purple mark on the soft part of his skin. He let out a throaty groan and you felt his finger dig in, most likely leaving finger sized bruises. “How about…” You lifted your lips off of his skin, blowing a little on the forming bruise, feeling Connor shiver a little bit. “I show you just how much I love you.” You smirked. Connor’s cheeks turned a bright shade of red. 

“Y-You don’t have to if you don’t want to.” It was strange seeing him this submissive. He was always dominant, a firm believer that he was the man and he was supposed to make you feel good. It took a considerable amount of convincing just to get him to let you top, and even then he ended up fucking you anyways. 

“I want to.” You whispered, pulling the zipper of Connor’s sweatshirt down your body, just in between your breasts, so he couldn’t see anything just yet, hoping to tease him just a little bit. He wasn’t really having it, pushing it off of your body completely, leaving your whole torso exposed. For a couple of moments, he didn’t really say anything, or touch you anywhere. His eyes went all over your body, until he finally placed his hands on your breasts, and since his hands were rather large and you yourself were rather tiny, they covered your breasts completely. He gave your chest a soft squeeze and you let out a tiny moan, biting back on your lip a little bit. You quickly remembered what you had intended to do, and you pulled his hands from your body. Before he could protest, you pushed your lips to his chest, leaving little tiny marks down his torso as you trailed your lips down to the line of his underwear. You were no longer in his lap, you were lying down on your stomach, your lips hovering above his skin. “May I?” You muttered, knowing he would hear you, seeing as he had turned off the video game. 

“Yeah.” He breathed out and you instantly pulled his boxers down his legs, and wrapped your hands around his erection you hadn’t really noticed he had until right now. He let out a soft groan, one of his hands lacing through your long hair. “Please.” He whined, and you were so turned on by the fact he was so desperate for you. You happily obliged, wrapping your lips around his tip, pushing as much of him as you possibly could into your mouth. He was pretty big, so you had to work a good bit of him with your hands. He was going absolutely inside, winding all of his fingers with your hair, tugging just a little. “You’re so fucking pretty holy..” He moaned out, tilting his head back, his chocolate curls falling over his back. You bobbed your head a little bit, but not much because you couldn’t even put half of him in your mouth. You were mainly jacking him off, but he didn’t seem to care, he seemed to love it, with all the moans and sweet comments about how beautiful you were. You yourself were starting to get turned on, and you started to touch yourself a little bit, your fingers delving into your underwear. “Don’t touch yourself, sweetie.” He somehow breathed out. “I’m close, but I wanna..” You hadn’t stopped yet, so he couldn’t finish his sentence without a small string of moans. “I want you to ride me, but I want you to come to let me…” A loud groan. “Bring you to the edge.” You instantly pulled your lips from his member, pulling yourself onto his lap, your body hovering just above him. 

“Okay, use your fingers.” His fingers drove you absolutely insane. They were long, and he could bring you over the edge after only a few minutes of his fingers teasing you and finger fucking you. He didn’t even say okay before he pulled your panties to the side and pushed two of his fingers inside of you, instantly causing your whole body to tense up. He curled his fingers just a little bit, and you were a complete mess. “Fuck, Con.” Your fingers wrapped around his shoulders, your nails digging into his soft skin. He started to pump in and out, agonizingly slow. You were already so close after just a few moments due to Connor’s fingers. “Stop, stop it I’m so close.” You whined, pulling yourself off of his fingers as fast as you possibly could. “Do you have a condom?” You sighed, aching to feel Connor inside of you. 

“N-No, my mom found the box last week and took them away, shit.” He leaned his head back against the end of his bed. You shook your head, knowing what you were about to say was probably a horrible idea. 

“It’s fine, just pull out.” His eyes widened a good bit. 

“Are you sure? I don’t want you to-” You shook your head cutting him off. 

“Yes, I’m on the fucking pill just pull the fuck out and don’t you dare.” He cut you off with a chuckle. 

“Okay, okay. Whenever you’re ready.” He pressed a sloppy kiss to your jaw, his fingers going back to the crotch of your panties, pulling them to the side, seemingly helping you out. One of your hands went to his hard on, holding it as you slid on agonizingly slow. He moved his hand from your core to hold onto your hips, knowing you’d need a little help. You always kind of struggled to keep everything going when you were on top. It took you a couple of seconds to get used to his size, regardless of the fact you had done this a number of times. You held onto his shoulders, digging your nails in again, steadying yourself on him, letting out small whimpers and moans, already feeling closer. He let out a few grunts and started to help you move your hips a little, but not much, not wanting you to hurt yourself. You weren’t bouncing all that much, but you were trying your hardest, and Connor seemed to like it, based off of the loud grunts and the fact that there were more finger sized bruises were being left on your hips and there were most likely going to be teeth marks left in your shoulder. 

“Con, I’m really close.” You moaned out, starting to fall forward on him, his strokes becoming sloppy. 

“Fuck, me too.” He pushed his nose into your neck, letting out soft moans in your ear. 

“Fuck pull out!” You squealed. 

“Oh, shit.” He spat, pulling out literally just in time, he came and made a slight mess of himself on his thigh, but it was fine, you’d be able to clean it up in a second. He titled his head back, letting out a slur of curses and moans as he came. He then realized what had actually just happened.“I’m sorry I-” You shook your head, letting out a whine. 

“It’s fine, you pulled out. I didn’t finish though, please.” You whined and whimpered, grabbing his hand and placing his fingers onto your clit. He nodded, knowing exactly what he was to do. He rubbed a little, knowing you were so dangerously close that it would only take a few seconds. He was right, as always, only having to rub two of his fingers on your clit in small figure eights for only forty five seconds or so before the knot in your stomach finally came undone. You let out a noise that was too loud to be a moan but wasn’t quite a scream. “Fuck, Connor.” You were basically shaking, after a second or two collapsing against his chest, both of you breathing rather heavily as his long arms wrapped around your torso. 

“You must love me a whole lot.” He joked, writing your name with his fingers across your back, sending shivers up and down your body. 

“I do.” You stated, pressing a tiny kiss onto the muscular skin of his chest. 

“Good, because I love you a hell of a lot too.”


anonymous asked:

"I don't love you" for the four word prompt

Note: Having to write about not loving someone was kinda hard, I sat for a while trying to find a way to write this without it being totally heartbreaking.

Maybe it was you two were just two kids in love, so caught up in the romance and the butterflies that you both rushed too far into things, maybe it was the harsh reality that sunk in after the romance began to die down. Maybe it was the constant cycle of a terrible and inconsistent routine that ate away at the two of you. Whatever it may have been, it left you wondering and doubting the relationship that was once so full of love and passion but is now like a burnt out fire, still smouldering hot but not igniting with bright flames and a desiring heat. 

He’s a businessman, periodically flying around to comply with his jobs’ needs and demands that bicker away at him, his priorities include his career, his career, his career, and then somewhere along the endless line of his careers needs you fall somewhere into place. 

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Chapter 162: The LUSCIOUS congratulatory GIFT

Note: Read the notes at the bottom for clarification. Remember, NO SPOILERS PLEASE, in the comments or anywhere on this account. I have not finished the novel. I stopped reading for now so that I can translate. No copy/paste and all that other shenanigans either. Vote/likes are highly appreciated. (◎ヮ◎)

SORRY! It took me longer to translate than I had anticipated since I had some personal things to attend to. 。゚・(>﹏<)・゚。

This chapter is so dang long I stay up until 4am working on it and even then I passed out. Dear goodness, I think it’s the longest so far and the content is descriptive. Please excuse any grammars….or tell me. :)

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Words: 1314
Rating: T
Genre: Fluff
Summary: Dorian has feelings. The Iron Bull has dimples. The two may be related.

However it happened, he is having dinner in the Herald’s Rest tonight, with no company other than the Iron Bull. They hadn’t arrived together, and hadn’t sat at the same table initially, but Bull had joined Dorian once the tavern began filling up for the night.

“Got room for one more?” he asks, holding a plate and a mug of ale. He makes no move to sit down in the free seat across from Dorian until given the go ahead.

“Naturally. I don’t have a big enough arse or ego to take up every last chair.” He tries to sound nonchalant, but his entire body buzzes.

Bull sits and chuckles, and Dorian’s eyes are drawn to Bull’s mouth like a compass needle is to the north –

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The Perfect Mistake

This is my first fic in a while, so go easy on me. I’ve been sitting on this idea ever since a discussion grew from a gif set concerning the debrief scene, in which people wanted to see Finn punch Archie instead of letting him leave. 

Note: concerning Finn’s knowledge of Archie’s sexuality. I haven’t specified it, but this fic works either in the timeline of both series or just the first.

Beta’d by the amazing stac, who has helping me so much and badgered me to get this written xx

The knot tightened further in the pit of his stomach as the door to the chippy opened revealing the cause of his affliction. He internally groaned as he leaned his head back and closed his eyes.  He felt empty and broken; like a piece of him was missing. He had completely fucked up! Why did he do it, gone and kissed Chloe like he had? She was fit he supposed, but she annoyed him to death. He remembered his antics at the rave of downing a few shots and letting Chloe lead him into the crowd of dancing party-goers. His drunken haze mixing with the blackened hold now on his heart had made him give in to Chloe’s lust fueled advances.

Hearing her footsteps getting closer he decided to face her, cursing the familiar flutter in his chest at her presence.

He just wanted her to look at him, to catch her eye, but she only gazed up at him once before withdrawing her eyes swiftly. He could faintly hear her voice like an echo, describing waking up in a field after the rave. Then it dawned on him: he had left her alone as soon as his happy existence came crashing down with one word.


Just thinking about it made the bile rise in the back of his throat. He had kissed his Rae! For weeks he’d idly watched their cozy conversations, private jokes and knowing glances. But, not being the jealous type, he just shrugged it off. Okay, if he was honest with himself that was a complete lie. His hands would ball into fists with his jaw clamped firmly shut, becoming increasingly on edge. He frequently got out his tobacco and papers, mastering the art of rolling a smoke just to keep his hands busy, away from Archie and his smug face and black-rimmed glasses.  Chloe kept flashing him flirty smiles, giving him all of her unwanted attention whilst Rae was distancing herself as far away from him as was possible. He’d have to warn Chloe off. And the sooner the better, as he was beginning to feel hunted. She was now sizing him up, like she was getting ready to pounce on him. Literally.

The smell of a proper fry up soothed him as the waitress brought the food over. “Whose idea was it to meet for food?”

Turning his full glare towards Archie, the anger eating him up inside made his mouth form words on its own. “It was my idea! This is supposed to be the debrief. The best part about the night out is the debrief in the morning.”

This matter may seem trivial to Archie, but to Finn this wasn’t just a gossip with your mates, dissecting the rave, reliving the night or what you could remember of it until you were out of it. He needed an answer to the moment that kept replaying round his head, jeering at him. His best mate had kissed the girl that he wanted, needed to be his. Finn felt betrayed. Archie had had his chance and blew it; he thought they were getting closer. 

“Yeah, well, fuck the debrief! I can’t eat when it feels like someone’s taken a piss on my soul.” Archie’s half-arsed retort ignited Finn’s irrational side, growing even angrier at his so-called best mate for ditching them and ignoring Chop’s attempts at calming the situation.

As Archie got up to leave, Finn’s attention kept wavering between him and Rae. Everything was moving as if in slow motion. Archie kept twisting the knife further after stabbing Finn in the back; he wouldn’t leave Rae alone as Finn’s head was screaming to make it stop as Archie was leaning in to kiss Rae.

Everything quickened. Every action became more poignant as Finn climbed over the table and, ignoring shouts from the rest of the gang, launched himself onto Archie, grabbing him by the collar pulling him away from Rae and flooring him with a mean right hook directly to his jaw. He jumped down from the table, not yet finished, and dragged up Archie who was too stunned to speak.

“Do ya like toying with people’s emotions, eh?” Finn shouted in Archie’s face, his voice full of rage and hurt. Archie looked back at Finn, his eyes wide and full of fear as he shook his head. “ Then why? Why kiss her?”

Archie went to retaliate but Chop beat him to it, grabbing Finn’s forearm trying to restrain him. “Mate, what are you going on about? Don’t do any thing stupid; this is Archie, remember?”

Finn was physically shaking under Chop’s grip as he turned away from Archie and scowled at Chop. “This is between me and him! Understood?

Chop stared point-blank at Finn in shock, raising both hands as he retreated from the pair.

“Finn, just calm down…I don’t know who I kissed, I was pretty out of it.” Archie had finally found his voiceas Finn’s death glare was slowly fading and reality kicked in. “I mean she can’t be worth this much trouble-”. Archie’s voice trailed off into useless mumbles as Finn slammed him hard against the tiles of the chippy’s walls, the deafening silence enclosing on them.

“Don’t you dare talk about her like that. She’s funny, loud and beautiful to boot. You had her and then threw her away. I’m not going to let you hurt her again.” Finn dropped his glare from Archie to stare at the floor. He internally cursed himself; had he said too much and given the game away.

“Finn…” He heard her voice like a beacon calling him home, but she was too far away from him. That one syllable, his name dropped from her lips was so full of hurt and concern, it made the breath catch in the back of his throat.

“Mate…” Finn looked back up at Archie, “who are you talking about? I would never hurt a girl. I-“

Finn saw Archie’s expression change from one of bewilderment to one of shockas his mouth dropped open as the realization hit him. “That’s why you’re angry with me? You like her? Your moodiness, your bickering about music; it all makes sense now… You want her! You want-“

“Finn!” Rae shouted his name whilst placing her hand firmly on his left shoulder. He roughly shrugged her off of him and backed away from both Archie and Rae, feeling scared and insecure as his secret desire was nearly exposed.

He felt like a coward as he turned and bolted out the chippy door, ignoring the gang’s cries for him to come back.

“You do know you just punched your best mate?”

Ah, that voice that was so full of confidence and self-determination. He wished he wasn’t glad she had followed after him. His heart beat an unknown rhythm harshly against his ribcage as he slowly faced her.

 “S’pose,“  he shrugged, glancing up at her face to gage her reaction.  She stood there with her brow furrowed in confusion as she stared back at him.

“But why?”

“Isn’t it obvious, Rae?” He made to move towards her but she let out a huff at him and folded her arms across her chest.

“Err, no, not really. You could have properly hurt him.” She still cared more about Archie than himand it caused a searing pain to shoot through his chest.

“Yeah, well, he deserved it!” the words dripping with venom as they left his mouth that was now permanently stuck in a scowl. He knew he should just walk away, but all the anger that was directed towards Archie moments before now coursed through his veins once more at the unfeeling girl stood in front of him.

“How could you go back to him after he humiliated you? He even stood you up and got me to play the fool.”

“Finn, what are you on about? Me and Archie are just-“

“No, Rae. Don’t lie to me. I saw you two together,” he interjected then chanced a look at her out the corner of his eye.

“When?” she asked tentatively, barely a whisper.

“At the rave. The two of you looked pretty close and it wasn’t just my imagination. You looked proper happy grabbing his face when you kissed him.”

Rae’s face contorted into an outraged frown with a fire burning behind her eyes, squared directly at Finn.

“Yeah, well, you’re such a good friend and so concerned for my welfare that you were sucking face with Chloe. Managed to get over your conflicted feelings quick enough with your tongue down her throat,” she barked at him.

Wait… She was angry with him? Was she jealous? This particularly enticing thought made him smirk like the smug bastard that he was.

Except it was completely the wrong reaction to her harsh words.

He audibly gulped as she stepped closer, completely violating his personal space. “You know what Finn? I actually started to feel concerned. Can’t believe I cared about you. Just go back to Chloe. She’s the one you want.”

He looked up at her, an accusatory gaze falling on her solemn face as he took a step back, running his hand haphazardly through his thoroughly ruffled hair before letting out a breathy laugh.  "You know what, Rae? That’s just the sort of horrible comment you’d expect from Chloe. Here I was thinking I’d fallen for someone completely different. I’ve wanted you for such a long time but now I’m not so sure. I’ve never fancied Chloe. She may be fit and popular, but she can be a right bitch. I could say the same about you now, can’t I?”

He was breathless and panting like he’d completed a 5k run instead of pushing away the only girl that ever meant anything to him at all. He could picture his only chance at happiness vanishing along with the fiery energy surrounding Rae as his head shot up when he heard her sniffle and saw her brown orbs aimed at the sky in an attempt to fight back the tears and failing. He felt like such a fool for causing her beautiful complexion to crowd over with a black cloud looming overhead.

They were both caught in a stare-off as neither was willing to back down, to be seen as weak and needy for each other. Finn moved to touch Rae’s cheek with a loving tenderness, as if she was a delicate wonder. Rae leaned in to his familiar warm for a split second before closing her eyes and letting the tears cascade down her rosy cheeks. She moved away from him, letting out a breathy sigh and backing away, leaving him all alone as he stood there stunned.

He managed to chase her down once she disappeared behind the street corner but couldn’t reach her. She was almost lost to him again but he had to try.

Mae!” he shouted desperately.

Rae stopped and turned to face him, looking small and timid with her sass visibly fading. Her eyes sifted from the floor up to reach him. “What?!” she crooned aggravatedly.

Wasting no time, Finn decided that instead of backing down he would charge towards her, his intentions made clear as he forcibly grasped the front of her shirt and kissed her luscious lips. He transferred all the pent up longing he had held onto since the day she was stolen from him before Knebworth into the kiss. He couldn’t help the smile that broke their long overdue embrace just as Rae’s arms had stopped flailing and were strategically placed either side of his waist almost instantly. Leaning their foreheads together, Finn decided to let her in.

He whispered to her innocently and carefully, “I hope my girl is still in there because I need her so badly! You have to know by now, girl…you’re my rock. You helped me through the pain of losing my nan and you ground me and keep me sane, Rae.” As he finished, he turned his attention to focus on the bit of her hair he’d been fingering through his speech.

“But why me? You could have anyone but you still choose me. I just don’t understand.”

Finn looked at her adoringly as he stroked her cheek ever so lightly with his thumb. “Shh,” he cooed softly as he placed his forefinger on her closed and bruised lips, and leaning down so his lips would graze her sensitive ear.

“Because you’re real, Rae – not fake at all, which is so refreshing. I want to share everything with you and have a true relationship that’s not just dominated by sex and superiority. You won’t let me down and you’ll argue with me ’til we’re both hot and bothered from the tension. I want to fight and make up with you all the time over the stupidest and littlest things. ‘Cause I would rather fight with you than make love with anybody else.”

They were both trying desperately to grab for each other as their lips crashed together hungrily, needing to be closer. Finn pressed Rae up against a nearby wall, yearning to be intimately connected to his Rae.

Rae broke the kiss prematurely in order to come down from the unbelievable high she got from Finn’s lips. Finn, however, couldn’t get enough of her now that he’d claimed her and immediately took to attacking her supple neck wanting to make her shiver and leave an incredibly damning mark she wouldn’t be able to forget.

“Finn, ” Rae moaned making him instantly shiver. She let out a cheeky and (although she would never own up to it) girly giggle as he peppered her neck with light kisses before dragging his sinfully good tongue along the fresh hickey. In the wake of her carefree laughing, he settled into the crook of her neck smiling sweetly.

“You drive me bloody crazy, girl,” he murmured before placing one last kiss to her skin.

Punching Archie. It was the perfect mistake.