the kevin james guy

adam sandler: ok so i got this hot new idea. it has me and im going to be a superhero that has a fat annoying sidekick played by my one guy kevin james. and in the end i get cameron diaz as my hot girlfriend.

movie studios manager: ok adam *gives him 55 million dollars* *whispers to guy beside him* lets see how fucking bad it is this time

Oh my GOD I am so fucking sick and tired of cismen complaining about how they have body standards to live up to. Like, boo fucking hoo, welcome to the life of women SINCE FOREVER. Do you know how long ago make up was invented? Do you know how many body standards women have been held to? Did you know women started dying their hair in ancient times to match certain standards?

Yeah, people gush over bodies like Chris Hemsworth and muscle-y bodies, but you haven’t been told since your time on this planet that your self worth is tied to your body. You haven’t grown up seeing Disney princesses with eyes BIGGER THAN THEIR WRISTS. 

You know what you have grown up with? Fat guys who get hot chicks. Men are constantly told that as long as they’re funny, nice, smart, etc, they can still get the girl, even if they’re overweight (anything with Kevin James, The Honeymooners, fucking Family Guy) or nerdy (Revenge of the Nerds, American Pie, She’s Out of My League).

You know what girls get in romantic movies? If you’re a skinny and pretty protagonist, you get a hot guy (literally any movie ever). If you’re not pretty, get pretty, and you’ll get a guy (My Big Fat Greek Wedding, any movie with a makeover sequence). If you’re not skinny, you’ll get a guy but it’ll be played for laughs (Bridesmaids) or you  won’t get a love interest at all. The only exception is Hairspray.

So, no, you being told you should lose some weight is not something I feel pity over. When Melissa McCarthy can be on a LEAD CHARACTER on TV show where her romantic interest ISN’T someone she met AT WEIGHT WATCHERS, I’ll start to give a fuck. Until then, I really don’t want to hear about impossible male body standards.