the internet and how it ruined my life

so like read this pls

my name’s kat. i’m 16, close to 17, and i just graduated high school. i’m a literal lesbian. hopefully, i’m going to college.

i live in venezuela. granted, i’ve lived a pretty sheltered life: my mom’s got a stable job which led to me and my brother living an okay life, even when our country’s falling apart. when we were little, we saw grown ups fight over politics, and we playfully joined in, not knowing how terribly deep it went. as the years went by, we saw the government and the opposition constantly plant hatred towards each other on the population. now that we’re older, we understand. now that we’re older, our families torn apart, our friends fleeing away, we understand.

i won’t be able to study what i want. because in this country, it doesn’t make money. because my country’s a trainwreck.

today’s july 30th 2017. today’s election day. the government of my country has decided to create a new constitution from scratch, without consulting the people. today, the elections are to choose who’ll write it, not if we want it or not.

the past few months, starting back in april if i recall correctly, have been disastrous. it began when the government decided to give the congress the middle finger and do whatever it wanted, instead of what the people wanted. so the people got angry and stood against it, for months and months. the military retaliated against them brutally; there’s dozens of dead and hundreds of injured, if not more. but if today’s elections end up in a literal purge, which at this point wouldn’t surprise me, those numbers will grow incredibly fast.

what i’m saying is: this is the product of twenty years of people insulting themselves. twenty years of a government praising hatred and applauding violence. this was once the richest country in latin america, this was the country that initiated the latin american independence wars. this was the country i was proud of. and i still am. but it has become so broken and corrupted: not just the government, but the people.

our tt at twitter today are, amongst others, #suicidazonacional (national collective suicide) and #the purge, often tweeted together. but along these, through all of these months, all of these years, the trends of my country have always been hateful and it breaks my heart to see how the place that i grew up in has become such a dark place to be.

It’s possible they might cut us off from the internet. they might cut our electricity and blame it on some sabotage. it has happened before. so, in that case, i guess i wanted to write this: my feelings towards this subject.

old people suck and have ruined my country, my life and countless others. don’t let governments manipulate you.

Before you snap at someone on the Internet...

Ask yourself these questions:

  1. Am I adding anything to the conversation?
  2. Or am I only writing this to get something off my chest?
  3. Would I tell this to the person to her face? 
  4. If you’re going CAPS LOCK, would you YELL this to the person in her face?
  5. Have I thought about how it’ll affect him?
  6. Have I ever had my day ruined by someone snapping or yelling at me?
  7. Might I not have all the information?
  8. Have I ever done the deed that’s making me upset?
  9. Have I ever done anything wrong?
  10. If I could see this person’s face, see her in real life, see her laughing and crying and talking, would I say this to her?
  11. Have I tried just stepping away?
  12. Is forgiveness an option?
Every Dan and Phil video in the London Apartment in order

I made a list of every single Dan and Phil video that they have uploaded since they first moved into their, (now old), London apartment. I have left out any YouTube Red videos but have included videos from all 6 channels, (danisnotonfire, AmazingPhil, danisnotinteresting, LessAmazingPhil, DanandPhilGAMES and DanandPhilCRAFTS).

If you think the order is wrong or any of the links are incorrect please let me know and I will try to correct it.

(I spent WAY too much time on this but oh well)

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Hi hi! How did you start your journey as an artist? I'm really inspired by your art and I'd like to get to know you more! <3

hi!! hehe that´s a really good question indeed :D

I started drawing when I was really young, you know, Sailor Moon, fantasy mum actually inspired me bc she drew Sailor Moon for me and my sis all the time. And my whole teen years were filled with childhood anime and manga so I drew a lot of that stuff!

I think when I was around 13, I discovered Katekyo Hitman Reborn (still my all time fave shounen manga tbh) and I was so in love with so many characters, I was literally obsessed over drawing them. So I kept drawing and drawing, and with every new manga I read/anime I watched, my style changed too (from super shoujo to more shounen like, to more realistic looking…). So I´ve always enjoyed drawing, but never took it too seriously. I took art and English as my advanced courses in highschool, showed it to friends, teachers and family, but that´s about it.

until I was 16/17-ish, when I started with digital art & sharing on the internet! That´s kinda a huge milestone for me, because I discovered this whole new world of art on social media, blogs, commissions, conventions, online shop, all these new opportunities..I seriously would have never imagined to be on cons or have an online store!! never ever! i remember how I was so proud to tell my friends that I had 200 followers on tumblr lol

It kind of happened one after the other…many unexpected things such as my rainy gifs getting over 200k notes, Mystic Messenger entering (ruining) my life but also leading to my first own zine…ofc I had many struggles in between too! The first time opening my store was very disappointing and discouraging, as I was full of expectations but got as good as no orders lmao but well I just continued doing my shit and it slowly expanded :D

but even now I have days where I doubt my whole existence as an artist..questioning wtf am I even doing etc but I guess that´s normal too. Idk what all of this will bring me to, which is scary but also exciting. 

wow i talked too much bye 

if u read to this point

i luv u

the signs as rpc excuses
  • aries: how would you feel if YOU were on the opposite side
  • taurus: i have anxiety and this is making me uncomfortable
  • gemini: this is the internet, there are no trigger warnings in real life
  • cancer: i'm popular and you're just trying to ruin my name #NobodyCanDragMeDown
  • leo: i got a terminal illess *insert pics that arent even the person shaving their head*
  • virgo: i was hacked?
  • libra: i'm only 15
  • scorpio: i've actually had personal issues with *thing they're being accused of* in the past :/
  • saggitarius: it's none of ur business, leave them alone
  • capricorn: i was bullied in the rpc 2 years ago
  • aquarius: educate them nicely, coddle them, spoon feed them, dont yell and start dramaz
  • pisces: my friend was on my account

anonymous asked:

explanatory is spelled wrong in ur bio

Right I am done! I am so…… *exhales*

Typos are ruining my life.. 
Right, before you all BDOWIAHDIWO SHHH
Let me explain…
The internet takes grammar VERY seriously
And there are few things as horrifying..
As unintentionally making a typo
And I am living in fear of a force that does not forgive.. and does not forget.

The grammar police *DRAMATIC SOUND!*
It doesn’t matter if you’re Tweeting or commenting on a video, on a… lawn mower forum
They will find you and they don’t care whether it was an accident or not
But they are going to punish you
And I don’t know how much more of this I can take
Don’t know what I’m talking about?
For example, the other day I Tweeted…
Dan: I’ve been craving ice cream all day even though it was cold and I googled why but everyone website is saying I’m probably pregnant
HAHA! Except I didn’t say that..
I said….
Big deal, right? Who cares?
Everybody! And everybody only cares about the typo. They don’t give a f*** about what you actually were trying to say.
When you post something that you think is really clever and funny, but no one cares what you meant, just the fact there was a missing comma in the middle!
It’s heart breaking!
I could’ve been like!
Dan: Hey guys here’s the mathematical formula for time travel!
And everyone would just be like..
A grammar police: PFFT! What’s was ‘formual?’ LOL!
And no matter how hard I try..
I can not escape them.
I can’t just delete it!
Then post it again!
They won’t let that happen!
When I try to correct myself it’s just
YOU CAN’T HIDE! I SAW IT! I SAW IT! I TOOK A SCREENSHOT! *Other sentences a grammar police would say*
It’s giving be anxiety!
I’m waking up in the night like..
Grammar police: Way to spell Dan that’s the wrong use of ‘its’
*Sigh of relief*
And you know what’s scary?
The grammar aren’t some mystical force in the universe…
We are all the grammar police…
We don’t even realize it!
But when humans see a typo..
They go into a frenzy of destruction!
But I swear!
I have the worst luck!
I only ever make typos if either everyone can see it or it’s the worse situation.
I can go like three months typo free and then all of a sudden text my grandma saying ‘dildo basket’ or something!
Like seriously, the universe HATES me
Some fan: Then why do you make so many typos then, Dan? Do you not no how to spel-
I know how to f***ing spell!
Do I look like someone who doesn’t know the difference between 'your’ and 'you’re’?
And I’m not about to do something that..
I will admit..
I am guilty of and often see other people doing…
Which is blaming auto correct…
I mean yeah, if you meant to text someone saying 'goodbye’ and it changed it to GAY BANANAS!!!
No.. NO!
That was probably auto correct.
Very unfortunate.
Super awkward.
I am very sorry.
But when someone tries to pass off a wrong use of 'their’
F*** off. It was not auto correct.
Honestly, the reason I make so many typos…
Is I type really fast
I type REALLY fast!
I’m like Speedy Gonzalos being electrocuted on a keyboard.
I’m surprised that I don’t set my laptop on fire everyone time I update my Facebook status.
Plus, I have kind of fat thumbs which doesn’t help when I’m trying to use my phone.
Some fan: So slow down and check it then!
I could..

I could, I mean that’s the issue here but..
I like living life in the fast lane!
I mean we are talking about precious seconds here!
That I could be spending picking bobbles off my jumper or maintaining a whole other tab in my browser and…
Ya’ know, if it means at the end of the day I’m making a few extra typos here and there.

*lip smack*
I have made my choice…
And I will deal with the consequences.
So I just wanted to say..
If you.. are a victim of accidental typo abuse..
I know what you’ve been through..
And I am I here for you.
But if you feel like you are part of the grammar police…
You are fighting a noble cause but please I employ you..
Do not..
The innocent…
I will cry silently
*Sexy music* It’s the sexy end screen dance!
Oh yeahh..
If you enjoyed this video and you would like to see more from me then click 'here’ to subscribe! to my channel.
To be told when I upload a new video.
I want to know how do you feel about typos in general?
Do you make a lot?
What kind of embarrassing one’s have you made?
Have you ever said something mortifying to a friend or a relative?
Or have you ever Tweeted something that all of your followers have pointed and laughed at you at…?
Please tell me down below!
Ooh.. Thrusting.. Yup..

  • male singer: *sexually harasses women, promotes rape culture, humanizes abusers and rapists, calls women derogatory and sexist names, shows graphic images of beating women, etc.*
  • male singer: it's art!
  • internet: oh okay
  • female singer: hey I'm mad about some pointless drama so here's a song about me being mad that's all sarcasm and irony to point out how ridiculous it is! It's my art!

anonymous asked:

Yankaaa I'm a newbie and I have a doubt that is ruining my life ;---; (If we plan to send a work to a printer) In Photoshop at the moment of making the work, we do it directly in CMYK colours or first do it in RGB colours and then convert them to CMYK? Also, do you mind sharing your colour settings? (it's okay if you not want to!)

Hi! Either way is actually fine. (Working in CMYK or converting RGB to CMYK) If you are also planning on posting your artwork to the internet, then you also have to note how it looks like in RGB mode, because goodness knows how awful CMYK artwork can look in a web browser. What you need to be wary of is choosing colours that may be out of gamut!

The phrase “out of gamut” refers to a range of colors that cannot be reproduced within the CMYK color space used for commercial printing. (source) CMYK is generally duller, so bright and saturated colours tend to not register so well when printed. You’ll know when a colour you picked is out of gamut when that ⚠️ triangle with exclamation point symbol shows up. When out of gamut colours are printed, the printer would try to convert it to the closest colour within its available range, which has the chance of becoming muddied or a totally different colour altogether (blue becoming purplish, yellows becoming red, etc)

TRUTHFULLY as artists and designers there’s only so much we can do to attempt to make printed images look the same way as how they appear on-screen. I could use the same printer and the output’s colour would still differ between batches. If I went to a different printer, that’d be another headache altogether. A general thing to remember though is that colours will ALMOST ALWAYS print darker than what appears on screen, so if your artwork has a lot of dark shades, it’d be best to adjust your image to be lighter before you send it off for printing. Also, test print things first if it’s within your means.

I have never changed my colour settings lollll I do recalibrate my monitor from time to time though!

kpop-goestheweasel  asked:

The internet really ruined me. I started roleplaying online when I was 13 which of course leads to smut if 🙄 Which means I’ve been reading and writing smut for 1/2 my life though I myself was pure up until 4 years ago. My characters have more experience than I do 🤦‍♀️ That being said, I do get a little nervous about how old some of my readers are. Kids these days are already growing up too fast, I’d hate to think I’m only adding to it 😬

If you weren’t, someone else would be. I didn’t lose my virginity til I was 18 but I was sexually active with smut and myself since I was 12. Personally I feel like kids are going to find out about sex no matter how much you try to hide it from them nowadays. What I do advocate though is trying to teach them safe practices like consent and sexual education and safe sex. How I feel about smut is it is a safe way of exploring sex. But you have to be careful and you have to set boundaries for yourself because there are people out there who are very manipulative and gross and I don’t want anyone to feel used and harmed. - Admin Jae

'The Lost City of Z' Star Robert Pattinson on His Epic Beard, Embarrassing Amazon Habit, and If He'd Ever Return to the 'Twilight' World
Robert Pattinson on April 5 at the ‘Lost City of Z’ premiere (Photo: Steve Granitz/WireImage)

Robert Pattinson has been waiting for his new movie The Lost City of Z to be revealed to moviegoers for nearly a decade. That’s about how long ago the 30-year-old Twilight alum was first approached by writer-director James Gray for his adaptation of David Grann’s popular non-fiction book about explorer Percy Fawcett’s long and dangerous search in the early 20th century for a hidden indigenous civilization in the Amazon.

Pattinson hung with the project through multiple lead changes (from Brad Pitt to Benedict Cumberbatch to, finally, Charlie Hunnam, who plays Fawcett). He even outgrew the role he was initially in the running for: Percy’s son Jack, played by Spider-Man Homecoming star Tom Holland. Pattison now portrays Henry Costin, a minor character in the book expanded for the screen, Fawcett’s hard-drinking, thick-bearded aide-de-camp. (The movie opens in theaters on Friday.)

In an exclusive interview with Yahoo Movies, Pattinson talked about the risks he’s attempted to take over the course of his career (even if no one noticed), if he’d ever consider returning to role of vampire Edward Cullen, and his embarrassing online habit that will pay dividends come one of his next films, Good Time.

How familiar were you with the source material for Lost City of Z? Had you read David Grann’s book?
Yeah, James gave me the book when it was a totally different script. Or I may have read it long before there was even a script at all. I think at the time he was thinking about me to play Percy’s son. Because I must’ve only been about 21. And then I just kind of stayed with it as time went on, and it went through all these different casts. [Laughs]

It sounds like the script changed a lot over the years. What were the biggest changes made over time?When I first read it, it was a straight action movie, like Indiana Jones. It was this rip-roaring adventure movie, and not this kind of epic, elegant saga that takes place over 30 years.

Costin is a much more minor character in the book. What did you build off of to shape him?
Well, I always thought with Percy’s character it would be a good idea to have a foil. I always interpreted Percy’s character as this man determined to fix the reputation that he thinks he’s deserved, and which his father has ruined for him…. He keeps going back to the jungle again and again and again, just to fix this insecurity. So I liked the idea of Costin being this character who basically had a total disregard for the English aristocracy or any kind of social climbing whatsoever. So he didn’t really want to bring anything back from the jungle, anyway. The entire point for him was just to go because he had nothing to live for in England.

Robert Pattinson in ‘The Lost City of Z’ (Photo: Amazon)

How much information was out there about the real guy? Any sense of his military career?
Well, Costin in reality was a refrigerator salesman. There was an advert in the Times of London saying, “Adventurers Wanted.” That’s actually how he got the job. [Laughs] He was one of the only people who applied for it. But he was in the army — he was a physical fitness instructor. But really, I liked the craziness of just applying to be an adventurer.

You rock some pretty rad facial hair in this movie. Did that look grow on you (pun intended), or did you not care for it?
By the end, I was definitely over it. But at least when you’re shooting a movie with your face covered, there’s very little makeup to be done. It was definitely, “Get out of bed, and that’s it” situation. That helped in the middle of the jungle.

You’ve played lead roles, you’ve taken supporting parts this is more of a supporting role in an ensemble. Do you have a preference these days?
There are certain directors I just really want to work with, and you bring what you can to a part. But in some ways it’s kind of nice [to play a supporting role]. It is a little bit liberating because you don’t have to concentrate on the narrative thrust of the story. You’re just purely thinking about character and just embellishing it a little bit. But with this, I would’ve played any part in it, pretty much.

Costin has some great lines in this movie. I think one of my favorites is when you say to Hunnam, “We’re too British for this jungle.” Did you guys feel out of your element filming in the jungles of Colombia?
No, I really loved it. I guess in some ways, it was kind of hard. But it’s just incredible, going to work every day in a little boat, going up river in the middle of virgin jungle in Colombia. It was very, very close to being on vacation, to be honest. [Laughs]

Watch Pattinson and Hunnam in a scene from ‘The Lost City of Z:’

But the type of vacation where you couldn’t eat anything?
Well, yeah. There’s a certain degree of harshness, and we were trying to lose as much as weight as possible in a really short period of time. So I guess there’s that element to it. But there’s a reason those guys wanted to keep going back as well. It’s amazing.

Do you consider yourself pretty adventurous? Could your relate to that thirst for exploration?
Yeah, definitely. I do sometimes find myself gravitating toward a job just because it’s shooting out in the middle of nowhere. If I’m shooting in a city, generally it can become a repetitive scenario. If you have anyone taking pictures on their phones, it just constantly reminds you of the reality of your life. And I find it becomes a little more difficult. Whereas if you’re out in the jungle and everyone is on the same page as you, you just sort of believe in character a little bit more.

What is your own personal Amazonian adventure? What is the biggest risk you’ve taken in your career so far?
I don’t know: I’ve done things which I thought were going to be really risky, which ended up not being risky at all. I generally try to keep finding ways to push the envelope as much as I can, and whenever I get the opportunity to do it, I generally try to take it. But I don’t really worry about taking risks, to be honest.

What’s something that you thought was risky that ended up not being?
I did this movie years ago called Bel Ami, which was at the height of all the Twilight stuff. It was this Guy de Maupassant novel about a guy who seduces women specifically to screw them out of their money and ruin their lives. I thought that was a relatively subversive choice to make at the time. [Laughs] And no one really seemed to think the same thing.

What is your relationship with your Twilight fanbase these days? Has the madness that surrounded your life calmed down at all?
It’s definitely calmed down in terms of my everyday life, but mainly because I spend more time in London, which is totally different. And I’m doing more parts that just sort of interest me, while in a lot of ways taking a little bit of a step back just to learn and get better. I guess I’ve never really acknowledged what the fan base is, or even if I have one. [Laughs]

Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson in ‘Twilight’ (Photo: Summit)

Oh, you have one.
But yeah, I’m always pretty curious about what people say afterwards, and who turns up, who likes the movie. It’s always kind of random. But I love it when someone who you just really wouldn’t expect says, “Oh, I liked you in this.”

What films have been most unexpected?
It’s always just really strange. I’ve done a bunch of movies which I thought might’ve been impossible to be seen. There was this film Little Ashes, where I played Salvador Dalí, from years and years ago, and just the other day I was walking down the street and somebody came up and said, “Oh, that’s my favorite film!” You kind of forget that people even watch your films. [Laughs]

What do you think of all the universe building that is going on in Hollywood right now, and the possibility that they could reboot Twilight and expand its world? Could you ever see yourself playing Edward Cullen again?
Really, they’re expanding it? So I’ll get my own spin-off? [Laughs]

Potentially! It could be called Edward: Homecoming.
Yeah, exactly.

But would you ever dip back in if the opportunity presented itself?
I mean, I’m always kind of curious. Anything where there’s a mass audience — or seemingly an audience for it — I always like the idea of subverting peoples’ expectations. So there could be some radical way of doing it, which could be quite fun. It’s always difficult when there’s no source material. But yeah, I’m always curious.

What type of role haven’t you been offered yet that you’re eager for?
I sort of, to a fault, rely a little bit too much on being inspired by things that land on my doorstep. I literally just did this movie called Good Time, which I think is a really interesting role. But I would’ve never, ever predicted that I would’ve liked it. [Pattinson plays a New York bank robber running from the police.] I think that he’s basically the embodiment of an angry commenter on the internet.

That sounds great.
Well, if you watch the movie you’ll probably be like, “Huh? What are you talking about?” But one of my favorite things to do — this is quite embarrassing — but you know how when you look on Amazon, and you see a product that’s got a consumer review that is so scathing, on like an electric toothbrush or something? Like, literally buying this toothbrush has ruined this person’s life. I always click on that person’s buying history, or their other reviews, and I’ll just read them for days and days. And I’m really amused. These people just have to vent this kind of furious anger on product reviews. I’ve always found that sort of character really interesting. [Laughs]

Read more from Yahoo Movies:



I may end up deleting my blog if that happens. I don’t care who you are, how adult things do not bother you but if someone catches wind that you are doing this with me and even if you say it was all good and okay, I still can be sent to jail.

This could ruin my life, I could lose my home, my family and being able to see my nieces. I could be labeled as a sexual predator, sex offender, even worse! A pedo!

Guys, it is not worth it! Please wait a few years! Do not get us in trouble cause you wanted to write dirty things on the internet. You could cost us everything….

Just so you know that everybody in China calls Overwatch heroin because it’s so addicting so there are a lot of “I’m buying heroin today” “I finally did heroin” comments going on on the Internet and it caused the government to have done a serious investigation of heroin trade

How does shipping work nowadays

First fase: ohw, look at these two characters… Internet talks a lot about them.
Second fase: *after reading fan fiction and watching fan art* ohw, they look so cute together, but the real show doesn’t seem so fluff, lovey dovey and joyful as fan fictions do, I’m not watching it because I don’t need another angst couple ruining my life.


I am actually so angry right now I’m crying. 

Hakima Benaddi, a Florida woman who was wearing a hijab at the time, was accused by Domino’s Pizza management of threatening to blow up the location after she complained about the service and pizza she received. On July 27, 2012, a pregnant Benaddi went to Domino’s to order a veggie pizza with her 23-month-old daughter. When Benaddi opened her pizza box she discovered that it was grossly inadequate and returned to complain and seek a refund.

“I was surprised because what I got was nothing like my order,” Benaddi explained. “That pizza was barely suitable to feed to a dog.”

Prior to the incident, Benaddi was a regular customer at the location. There was one small difference, however, on the day of the incident Benaddi had recently started covering her hair by wearing the hijab, the Muslim head scarf.

The Domino’s Pizza did not assist Benaddi when she returned, they did not offer to make her a new pizza or offer her a refund. Instead, the cashier laughed at her and mocked her limited English proficiency.

Then, in what could only be described as a brazen discriminatory act, the Domino’s Pizza management called local police claiming that Benaddi had someone with her with a bomb remote and threatened to blow up the location resulting in Benaddi’s arrest.

Benaddi was in custody for over 24 hours before she was released. She was also forced to remove her headscarf before her booking image was taken.

CAIR Florida’s investigator revealed that eyewitness accounts were consistent with that of Benaddi’s and admitting that Benaddi never made any threats other than to file a complaint. The story the Domino’s Pizza’s manager provided to the police was completely, intentionally and maliciously fabricated.

Although the felony charge against Hakima was dropped before the arraignment, Domino’s Pizza has yet to confirm any wrongdoing.

“Without them acknowledging what they did wrong, this is our only opportunity for her voice to be heard,” said Thania Diaz Clevenger, Civil Rights Director of CAIR Florida. “We need to tell people that this is not okay, to let Domino’s Pizza know this is not okay, and to let other Muslim women who are targeted to know that they can stand up for themselves.”

“I can’t find a job. They see my record and see a terrorist. How will my kids feel, when they grow up and see their mothers mugshot. Now I’m scared to talk to any person, I have to bring a recorder with me everywhere. After seeing what one person can do when they make up a story…I can go to jail for life just because someone wants to lie and make up a story to against me.” says Hakima Benaddi. 

Guys I’m so angry right now YOU HAVE NO IDEA. I’m angry because this woman reminds me of my mother. My mother has the same accent, my mother wears the hijab, my mother is outspoken when she is being mistreated. ALL OF THESE THINGS THAT RESULTED IN THIS WOMANS ARREST. They saw a muslim woman and took that opportunity to treat her as if she was a trash. And when she spoke up about it and they didn’t like it, they called the police on her and decided to throw the “terrorist” label around. They had this woman arrested, her mugshot on the internet (without her hijab) and had “terrorist threat” on her record. They went out of their way to ruin this woman’s life because they mistreated her based on simply wearing a hijab and didn’t like that she stood up for herself. 

This is what its like to be a muslim in America. This is how easy it is to ruin ones life by labeling us terrorists.



anonymous asked:

did you bother reading enoughtoholds response

Because I don’t want to add any more to that thread, I’m going to respond to it here.

it is unbelievably telling that you and your fellows apparently think it is literally impossible for straight people to genuinely not have a negative reaction to finding out someone’s not straight. to genuinely see us as ordinary human beings and not as political symbols or strange curiosities or terrifying monsters who will attack at the slightest provocation.

It’s an absolutely true fact that there are straight people out there who will react negatively to someone coming out as LGBT, and that there are allies who will try to “support” LGBT folks in unproductive ways. This discussion isn’t about them. It’s about allies who don’t know how to support people who come out to them because they read posts on Tumblr and elsewhere, where some LGBT people sneer at allies who are rather overenthusiastic in their support, or who mean well but come across as cringeworthy, and then when asked about how allies should react, simply say, “Like a human being!” without any explanation for what that means.

Spend enough time on Tumblr, and it’s easy for any ally to develop anxiety and/or scrupulosity issues over this kind of thing. Hell, I did, and I’m actually gay.

You know what I find unbelievably telling, though? Conflating “allies who have anxiety and/or scrupulosity issues over how to react when people come out to them because they completely understandably don’t want them to write snide posts about them on Tumblr” with “people who treat LGBT folks as political symbols or strange curiosities and are therefore implicitly homophobic.”

(Oh, and you know why some allies can end up viewing LGBT people as “terrifying monsters who will attack at the slightest provocation”? Because I’ve actually seen that happen on Tumblr. Many, many times, as a matter of fact.)

if you think that reacting to a woman saying “my wife” without being scared or feeling the need to make a speech about how much you’re TOTALLY fine with the gays is “going against human nature,” straight-up, you’re a homophobe.

Like, you do realize we’re not just talking about allies who have developed scrupulosity issues by spending enough time on the SJ side of Tumblr, right? If you look at the rest of the thread, we’re talking about people with already existing anxiety and/or other mental illnesses, people with disabilities that impact their social skills (like being autistic, which – guess what – I also am!), people who are marginalized on other axes (like many of those making the same arguments I’m making), etc. I could very well make the case that you’re being ableist.

i treat them right, even when they make it clear they can barely contain their revulsion at me. i am fucking nice to them anyway. bizarre, i know — how could someone who made a little joke to vent on the internet possibly be kind and unassuming in real life and not some kind of cartoonish villain who is Ruining Activism? yet somehow it’s true!

I’m glad to hear you do this! This is a principle I try to follow in my own life as well.

The thing is, though, you don’t actually have to be a cartoon villain to be “Ruining Activism.” You just have to spend more time sniping at the people trying to help you than those trying to kill you and keep you down.

(Also, when you post something on Tumblr – or anywhere else on the Internet – it can be seen by literally everyone in the world with a computer and Internet access. If you really don’t want anything you post to go viral and be taken out of context and criticized, you probably shouldn’t post it in the first place. Or at the very least, post it in a forum only certain people can view.)

and our well being is more important than the bruised egos straight people might get if they see us coping with this through a little joke on the internet that wasn’t even meant for them!

First of all, the problem I have with “our well-being is more important than your feelings” is that far too often it gets turned into “because you’re feelings don’t matter, we can trash and sneer and make fun of you all we want, and you have to take it because you’re our ~~allies~~ and that’s what’s expected of you.” Allies in that kind of environment don’t stay allies for very long.

Second, you’re conflating “allies with scrupulosity issues/anxiety/mental illness/disabilities/poor social skills/are LGBT themselves/etc.” with “straight people with easily bruised egos.” I find that particularly telling as well.

in conclusion i would dearly appreciate it if you and @fierceawakening would take your respectability politics and fuck off, thanks!

This isn’t respectability politics.

This is not burning your bridges because you don’t like how they were built.

How kpop disappointed me/ exo drama/ the impact in my life

Hello, my name is carol and its 3am, i should be sleeping right now but i found this blog and as reading these confessions i felt a strong urge to confess myself as well.
I’ve been dealing with this feelings and thoughts for a while now, but I cant say anything on my twitter fc (cause the other kpoppers will judge me) and i dont have any friend who would care enough for what i have to say.
So this is going to be long, i apologize.

I was emo, you know? Listened to emo bands and heavy music with screams and shit, and i was always against pop music because it was fake, and it was purely all for the money. So you have no idea how shocked i was when i found myself starting to like kpop.
I met kpop thanks to my best friend at the time (we’re not friends anymore), and she was emo as well, i remember when she would still wear black and dye her hair and talk about Get Scared and Devin Sola on twitter while she was discovering kpop and listening to SNSD. She showed me “I got a boy” mv and i was like…. okay… but nah.
A few months later she left the emo side and got really deep in the kpop world becaming an Exo fan and Chanyeol biased.
I just watched her while i was still digesting the idea that she left our emo world to be a fan of asian people.
I never thought it would happened to me.
But there was this music channel on tv and every week it would have this “ichiban interference” which would show asian music, kpop, cpop, jpop and jrock.

I missed my friend, and i felt distanced from her. So i started to watch that program to see if i could like kpop. And…….. I kind of did. I was just so excited to get back to having something in common with her and i just wrote the names of the groups i have liked while watching the program so i could search it later on.

*funny fact tho, somehow i already new shinee 2 years before i enter the kpop world for real, and even thought i didnt listen to them i would mantain this crush on choi minho and even like his pages on facebook.

The first group i got into was, of course, Shinee, because i already new them and already loved Minho. So until this day they are my babies and my ultimate group.

She was all into Exo and i just didnt really cared for them. But because it was important to her, i gave it a shot.
I entered the Exo fandom right after Kris left. I didnt had any problems to know who was who. Althought at the beggining i had a problem with sehun and luhan and for a while i thought they were the same person lol but that passed.
I also made an fc on twitter to be close with my friend again, which made me later on go very deep in the exo world. And because of all the problems they had, I also suffered a fucking lot being a part of their world.
As i said before, i was always against pop music because it was purely commercial. The thing that made me accept kpop was when i read about the trainee thing, and how they would work really hard for years and just really dedicate themselves to the maximum to acomplish their dreams. I thought that was very admirable. So i felt like it was okay for me to like kpop, because it was different and they were all very admirable people.
I thought it was a dream land you know? Get accepted in a company, be a trainee for a few years and then debut and become pretty and famous and rich.
But as soon, as me being an exo-l, exo started to fall apart, all of these delusional ideas i had about that lifestyle and this industry, began to crash.

When Luhan left I spend like, 4 weeks crying. No joke, i would start crying in the middle of the night and go running into my dads room so he could confort me.

I dont know how and why but Exo really took the best out of me. I would cry for anything they did. it was insane. But also im very sensible and i do cry a lot so idk.

The thing is, after that i got really hurt you know? Because i thought SM after kris leaving would be more rational about things and would treat the boys better. But no.
And now its Tao’s turn and this one… This one is just extremely fucked up. Because i know, i know very deep in my heart how Tao loves Exo and loves us fans. He was always the one who would try to make us feel better and confort us, and he always promised he would never leave. And now to be where we are now, i mean… It makes me realize how fucked up this industry is behind the scenes.
(As i am young to this fandom you’ll probably say i dont have the right to be this sad and blablabla. But I did watched showtime and i think once you watch that there’s no turning back, you’ll love each boy and cherish them to the maximum. Because i entered the fandom right when kris left, i didnt really cared for him, but after showtime i was like… really sad, and even thought i became a fan when they were ot11, i am ot12 in my heart. You might think i dont have the right to it but i dont care, i know my feelings towards it and i know how much i care about them)

So after that, and also that whole baekyeon scandal (it shocked me that baek and tae lost fans just because they fell in love. I do understand that they didnt handle things how it should’ve been handle but damn, have the fans never experienced falling in love with someone and wanting to share their love with others and show it to people, and how exciting everything is? not to mention baek is young and he always liked tae. I dont like her, and she is older, so i do think she as someone more responsible, should’ve known better), and honestly it really pisses me off how the fandom said it was marketing, BECAUSE GOD FORBIT THAT BAEKHYUN IS ACTUALLY STRAIGHT AND DOES NOT DATE CHANYEOL IN REAL LIFE!!!!!! That is one thing i dont have the patience. Im all up for homossexuality, but to see how hardcore these shippers can be and how the fans suddenly feel like they have the right to dictate the sexuality of their idol and anyone who says “no, he’s straight” is wrong and delusional… I mean… Come on.. Get off your high horse honey. (i dont know if it was markenting or not, i do not care either, i just hated how the fans reacted)
And seeing the korean media and how the netizens criticize everything the idols do that dont go acording to what they belive. And seeing how they are always making big drama out of nothing ( ex taehyung x bigbang). Seeing how the fans deal with all of this, where their idols cant even be themselves that they’ll instantly get criticized (ex: sehun and his comments on ig) …. I really hate that, the fact that the idols (not all idols) cant be themselves completely, they have to follow some rules (probably) to what they can or cant say, and they cant even be free on the internet either as the fans will judge them and the media as well. So I mean, how can I love someone and be fan of someone, that it isnt true? You know what I mean? How can I relate to you? I cant.
I just got so tired, Im exausted to say the least.

I wont say kpop ruined my life, because honestly shinee is still one of the few things that makes me happy and whenever im sad i listen to them and feel better. And Im really happy because Shinee is one group that remains intact, they never have any dramas with their name on it. Its just so peaceful for me to be a shawol. Also being a xiumin, lay and tao biased, they never failed to make me happy, and every time i see them i instantly gain a smile in my face. Also my parents support me much more with me liking kpop than with me liking, as they call it “noises and screams and dirty people who look dead”. Anddd my mom also likes choi minho so its pretty awesome when we talk about him and fight for him as in who he belongs to. (HE IS MINE MOM)

But i entered the kpop world thinking it would be magical and it would only bring joy in my life. But now im at a point where everything is just slowly being destroyed and the land i once thought it was bright and colorful is now all black and white and broken.
Not to mention how kpop took my life completely, i was never into going out (as i have social anxiety and panic attacks) but the fact that i would spend ALL of my daily hours on my fc just talking about koreans and chineses and saving their pictures religiously and spending hours organizing their albuns and stuff (my exo paste have 14 thousand pictures and this is just the pictures i would save while i was on twitter, without downloading any pack or anything)
I just…. this was a really long rant and im still keeping out a lot of other thoughts, this is just a resume basically.
I just wanted to say that im disapointed. There’s no better word than that. I felt like i was promised so many things while entering this world, but as things kept progressing a lot of things happened and my positive thoughts about it were slowly dying, and i compromized so much of myself and my life to it, to now being here, sad and all fucked up thanks to it.
Lately i dont stay on my twitter so much, i rarely enter it tbh. And i just spend my days reading or watching a serie or anything that its not related to asians and kpop because honestly i just need a break from it, a break to digest all of the things that happened in 2014, a break from this drastic change of (my) taste and just trying to deal with the true that it is: kpop is not what i looks like, yes the music is good, yes they look good and happy but we dont know what happens when no one’s around, we only know what we are showed and therefore, due to all the dramas that happened, i myself am incapable of trusting kpop again.
(I even started to listen to my emo bands again, so i could forget kpop for a while. This is what is helping me ‘keeping it real’)
I will always love my groups and will always support them, but I dont wanna go back to the place i was (dedicating my life to it). And now i definitely am more aware of everything, and if anything, one positive thing that kpop did was making me more smart and careful towards my trusting hability.
Thats it, thats my confession, it was really long im sorry. I started writing this at 3am and now is 4am.
*I have a question tho, it was only with me that after kpop i just dont feel atraction to ocidental guys like i used too? I was never really picky when it comes to men but after kpop now i do want them to be someone who take care of themselves, and have a nice skin, and dress nicely. Also i get crazy everytime i see an asian on the street, and i just find them much more atractive than the ocidental person.
*im brazilian so sorry for any mistakes, as english is not my first language.
*please be kind and try not to call me names. I know that for some people i’ll appear like a retarted girl, and maybe i am, but i just really needed to get this out of me. And if you want to know, im 16 and started to like kpop in the end of 2013 when i was still 14.

11 first-person essays to add to your weekend reading list

“I’m a black activist. Here’s what people get wrong about Black Lives Matter.” 

“I live in Iran. Here’s how sanctions have shaped my life.”

“Confessions of a Congressman”

“I used to lead tours at a plantation. You won’t believe the questions I got about slavery.”

“9 things I wish people understood about anxiety”

Originally posted by guarantead

“The internet is full of men who hate feminism. Here’s what they’re like in person.”

“I spent 2 years cleaning houses. What I saw makes me never want to be rich.”

“7 ways living in Switzerland ruined me for America and its lousy work culture”

“How Medicaid forces families like mine to stay poor”

“I had a miscarriage, and it forced me to rethink everything I believed about abortion”

“I’m Latino. I’m Hispanic. And they’re different, so I drew a comic to explain.”

  • Estonian: *goes on vacation*
  • Estonian: *forgets ID-card reader home*
  • Estonian: Oh no my life is ruined! How shall I ever go to internet bank now or vote? How shall I ever access my medical information, should it be needed?`What happens if I should need to declare my taxes?!
  • Everyone else: Wait what you can do that online???

some people go into my inbox and talk about how great I am and what a beautiful, kind person i am

and I just laugh because who i am on the internet isn’t like who i am in real life

in real life i blurt out shit and i can’t edit the way i can edit a post

in real life i stutter or mispronounce shit or fumble a lot over my words and that always ruins whatever joke i was trying to tell

and in real life I don’t always have the reaction time to say a clever response