OMG! people! I just saw the St. O’s episode, Oh.My.God! What.The.F#ck!
Seriously people, this was bigger than Blood Moon Ball! That was the episode of the big starco moment and this one right here, was the big theory headcannons! Let me just say that all your theories are awesome and make sense, BUT WE’RE NOT CONFIRMED ON WHAT REALLY IS GOING ON!!! I would also like to say that I love how this episode was a half hour long (like how I prefer my shows to be) and that the show is getting deeper and serious. SO HERE ARE MY THOUGHTS!
*St. Olga’s School for Wayward Princesses-So in this episode, we finally get a good look at that “prison-like” school of St. O’s and how Star and Pony Head see it as a torture/dungeon like place like how they always brought it up to be (my thoughts on that later) Anyways, it’s Pony Heads birthday and Star was talking to her through her magic mirror and about to send her some firework shooting cupcakes. However, Pony Head was acting all weird and saying she shouldn’t have them and that there are no deliveries in St. O’s. Star freaks out at the mention of that and hides under
rug chest and suddenly, Pony Head is dragged away by the guards for expressing her individuality as her third strike and Star freaks out some more.
Marco sees her upset and tries to cheer her up, but then backs out at the mention that it’s about Pony Head (okay so people are saying that Marco was being an a** for not giving a sh#t about the mention of Pony Head and yeah so that was an a**hole thing for him to do, but let’s keep in mind, Pony Head and Marco aren’t actually close and Pony Head is possessive towards Star. For crying out loud she tired to kill him and although they seemed to have gotten along the last time we saw, they still need to develop more) Star freaks out over mentioning St. O’s again and hides under the
rug somewhere else (okay seriously wtf is that under the rug!? It’s her boots, but they’re moving? Who’s under there!? What is under there!? Are her boots alive!? IDK!?) and says they should bust her out and Marco is all in for that badass action so they leave armed with a bobby pin (Marco) and the wand (Star, duh).
They arrive and see a carriage bringing in more wayward, out-of-control, wild and crazy princesses. Marco says they should blend in and disguise themselves so Star transforms via Sailor Moon style (Eeee, childhood nostalgia) into a rebel pirate princess and Marco into a girly princess! Lol! You guys sure loved that didn’t cha? Funny, he only complained once about it and never again? They follow the others in with the scary guards and the igor looking guy and are introduced to a commercial depicting the school on how they turn misbehaving princesses into prim and proper stereotyped princesses (okay, so they’re a little reckless, but they also mention eliminating the individuality too………..what?) we then meet the Headmistress of the St. O’s, Miss Heinous. The cold, ruthless and stern women hell bent on turning princesses into “normal princesses” when she sees Stars heart cheeks, she makes a crack mark on it knowing shes from Mewni (the cheek thing is one of the theories here and I’ll get to that later) after she informs everyone on how there’s no escape with dimensional scissors inside the school and how they’re security is a light tower, Marco and Star sneak off to find Pony Head.
Marco doesn’t see anything wrong with the school and thinks its fancy and elegant (okay, so it maybe it is nicely Victorian with the medieval fantasy design and its morbid look, but it’s still depicted as Hellish and it’s constantly night there!) we then see a singing teacher (a.k.a. Jodi Benson who was both Ariel and Thumbelina) teaching the elephant princess from Sleep Spells (Princess Smooshy) how to sing to animals (okay, so it’s cute that princesses can sing and be friends with animals, but it’s not mandatory!) Star is the only one who sees the horrors of the school and our eyes are opening up to that as well (more on that later).
They finally find Pony Head and see that she’s completely different form what we’ve last seen of her. Her hair is braided, she’s too smiley, she has huge eyes like she’s on drugs or something and more importantly, she’s prim and proper! Star tries to to snap her out of it only for Pony Head to stay etiquette. Despite her wishes and calling out for the guard that was chasing them, Star and Marco run off and come to a room filled with the arrived wayward princesses learning how to sip tea: Keep your pinkies at 90 degrees, more tea please. Marco now sees that Star was right and that St. O’s is a school of horrors (okay, people my eyes are now open to the truth. St. O’s School for Wayward Princesses is a brainwashing facility used to turn out-of-control princesses into mindless stereotyped princesses without they’re consent! I always thought Star, Pony Head and maybe other out-of-control princesses were just overreacting to the school and that it’s not really that bad, I mean when you think of it, it was supposed to sound like a Juvenile Reform School to better yourself with proper class meetings and therapy, but in this case IT’S A LIE! ALL A LIE! THEY’RE BRAINWASHING PRINCESSES WITHOUT THEY’RE CONSENT!) THE SCHOOL IS EVIL!
While they’re hiding, Marco creates a distraction to get the guard away and starts a princess rebellion: IT’S NOT CRIMINAL TO BE INDIVIDUAL! and the princesses follow suit and Star, Marco and Pony Head get away (that was awesome there). Miss Heinous hears about the uprising and demands to find the “princess” responsible for causing it, so she puts the school on lockdown. The gang run into a large round moon where the ceiling is glass wall depicted with demons and a mysterious face and a light shining through with the one eye and the floor being a sun/moon/star symbol too and Star and Marco have no idea what it means (I think we all have ideas on what it all means the sun (Marco, he was originally named Sol according to Daron which means sun), the moon (Blood Moon) and the star (what else, Star) as this is one of the theories and I think I have one of my known too!) as they try to escape through the laundry shoot, Marco gets caught!
Star and Pony Head land in the laundry room and Star finds out from Pony Head that they’re putting Marco through a brainwashing process (Clockwork Orange style) on how to be a proper princess (the bobby pin was no help there, but it was smart to keep it in your stomach as an escape tactic) as Miss Heinous watches. Back with Star, she was doomed. Her best friend is brainwashed, her other friend is going through the same thing and she doesn’t know what to do. What’s worse? She sees a poster that reads, Embrace a Princess mentally, Wash away your Individuality. Star does not like that one bit and goes through a mental breakdown and cries. She thinks who she is wrong and that needs to be corrected making her look pathetic! Poor thing (I remember looking at a post saying how Star feels about that and really hit it hard for her as this is the first time we see her cry for something serious and not something petty or trivial. Here’s something I noticed, her mother wanted to send her here, her mother wanted to send her here, HERE MOTHER WANTED TO SEND HER HERE! HER. MOTHER. WANTED. TO. SEND. HER. HERE!!! QUEEN BUTTERFLY WANTED TO SEND TO SEND HER OWN DAUGHTER TO A SCHOOL WHERE THEY BRAINWASH HER! DOES SHE KNOW WHAT THEY DO THERE!? AND IF SHE DOES, WTF QUEEN BUTTERFLY!? WTF!?) Seeing Star cry heart-brokenly like that finally made Pony Head snap out of it, destroy the poster that now reads: Embrace your Individuality and return to her normal (and playfully out-of-control) self! Star is overjoyed and they go save Marco (Pony Head considers him a friend (an Earth friend to Star) but still a friend none the less even though she still calls him Earth Turd. Remember people, Marco and Pony Head need more development from each other).
Star and Pony Head burst into the brainwashing room and Star turns the machine into a huge butterfly that attacks Miss Heinous and her grows clubs on her cheeks? (wait? wtf? she has clubs on her cheeks!? This is yet another theory everyone’s talking about as now we got a clue on who Miss Heinous really is. Star (hearts), Queen Butterfly (diamonds) and Miss Heinous (clubs) like the deck of cards! But then, who has the spades? Is Miss Heinous Star’s aunt? What does it mean? IDK?) Miss Heinous freaks out over her cheek marks appearing and starts to brainwash herself! (that’s some freaky sh*t right there people). As the gang escape, they see the other princesses still chanting Marcos words and he leads them to bust out and go for a princess attack! Badass! They all attack the guards and Star destroys the tower that was supposed to be the security! Boom, Baby! When Star, Marco and Pony Head try to leave, Pony Head says she’ll stay to watch over the princesses and thanks Star and Marco for helping her be herself again and Star and Marco escape.
In the end, Miss Heinous was done brainwashing herself (*coo-coo*) and her club marks disappear (who are you woman?) she then finds Marcos bobby pin and does some experiments on it discovering that it’s from the Earth Dimension and becomes determined to find “her” and finish ‘em off! Done Done Done!
OMG! What an episode! We got sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo many theories and secrets that are yet to be solved and we going into Gravity Falls territory! I think I have a theory of my own and I’ll post it soon. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m gonna go and reblog all your theories so I can remind myself and everyone in the svtfoe fandom what the good f*ck is going on!
THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME AND PATIENCE