the girl behind in the second fic is me


Pairing: Charles Xavier x reader

Words: 953

Warnings: none

Request: Hi! I’m sorry for the bother ^^ Are you still taking fic requests? There was a story for a ship you made with Charles Xavier where the reader is absolutely clueless in romance and doesn’t get his approaches and constantly asks about the girl he likes (not realising that it’s her) and he finally tells her the truth straight. Would you please please write this ship like a fanfiction? - for beautiful anon

A/N: aaahhh my second fic is here!! I’m really sorry it took me so long and I hope it won’t happen again! I loved writing this one. Enjoy!

“Hey, y/n,” you heard from behind. As you turned around you saw Charles coming closer to you, with an excited look on his face.

“Hey!” you greeted him, with a broad smile you weren’t able to suppress. Yes, you had a crush on him. You’re not a kid anymore, why do you still have silly crushes? you thought constantly. It was a question that popped on your mind quite often. You never thought he would like you back and, honestly, you never saw any sign of it either so you never confessed this to him. “What’s up?”

“I’m going for a walk around the gardens and I wanted to know if you wanted to come,” he said, an innocent smile showing on his face. You didn’t know this, but he liked you back. A lot. The only problem was you didn’t seem to get the hints he sent you. Charles would usually invite you to go for walks where you would talk non-stop about everything and anything. More than once, he bought you flowers hoping for you to realize about his true feelings.

You, on the other hand, were totally oblivious of the true purpose behind his plans and always viewed this small, though meaningful, gestures as no more than friendly. You were so clueless, so blinded by your own feelings, you didn’t notice someone else’s.

“I’d love to,” you replied showing him a kind smile; the type of smile that made Charles melt in the insides and fall for you even harder.

The gardens were especially beautiful that day. It was a warm and sunny afternoon, the sun shined through the trees’ brunches and the welcoming atmosphere relaxed you. While you were strolling, Charles was telling one of his many stories, the ones you never got tired of listening. Once he finished, you fell into a comfortable silence.

“So,” he said, “I noticed you started spending more time with Hank. Is there something going on between you two?” He did his best to hide the sadness in his voice, but hiding feelings was never one of his best talents. You didn’t realize this, of course.

“No, we’re just friends. He’d been helping me with something this week,” you replied innocently. “And what about you? Is there a special someone?” You figured if you weren’t going to be with Charles, the least you could do was make sure he chose the right person. You wouldn’t want him to end up hurt.

“Actually, there is. A girl I’ve liked for a long time.”

You heard the noise of something breaking. It was your heart. Your stupid heart that liked people that weren’t going to like you back. Your stupid heart that already expected this, but broke anyways. Your stupid heart that loved Charles Xavier.

“Really? And who’s she?” you asked smirking, hiding your feelings completely from the outer world. “Do I know her?”

“Yes, you do. But I’m not telling who she is,” Charles chuckled. He was so relieved that you weren’t interested in Hank that he felt like he could jump around the place. “I don’t think she realized I like her yet, though I’ve been pretty obvious. She’s clueless with this kind of things,” he grinned at the thought.

“Just tell me who she is and I’ll investigate for you,” you insisted, trying to convince him to confess.

“No, I won’t fall for that, y/n. You’ll have to do better,” the mutant answered, praying he wasn’t blushing in front of you.

“Oh c'mon! Seriously?” You weren’t giving up, but your persuasive resources were running out. 

“If only you could read minds…” he said faking sadness as a way to make you laugh and forget about it. Charles didn’t feel ready to confess his feelings for you.

You tried insisting again, but failed miserably. However, before giving up you had one more weapon in your arsenal. Puppy dog eyes. It was the one thing you knew he wouldn’t resist. More than once you’d get away with something because of them. Other mutants in the school would joke saying it was another of your abilities. You knew it’d work.

“No, y/n, that’s not fair. No! Don’t!” he tried to avoid it, but when his expression softened, you acknowledged your win. “Ugh, fine. It’s you. Happy? I like you. A lot, by the way.” His smile faded away and now seriousness invaded his eyes. Charles avoided your gaze, looking at the ground like if he was embarrassed.

What?! was all that came to your mind at the moment. Was it really happening? Was it just a hallucination? No. It wasn’t. You heard him very clearly. And did he say he’s been obvious about it? You knew you weren’t the best at picking up signs but it still surprised you how clueless you could be sometimes. You were so immersed into these thoughts you didn’t realize your outside didn’t show the happiness you felt in the inside.

“I knew it. You don’t like me,” he deduced from your face. “Look, I don’t want you to feel pity or anything, okay? I just don’t want to stop being friends with you,” Charles was starting to get worried, but then he spotted a smile growing on your face. “Why are you smi-”

But you didn’t give him the chance to finish his question as you interrupt him with a kiss. You couldn’t believe it. Neither of you could. You run your hands through his hair while his hands were gently placed on the small of your back. Slowly, you pulled away, gazing at him. He was grinning widely with no intention of hiding it. You were too.

Guess you were really clueless when it came to love.

To Read List Updated

Life has kept me away from reading any fic over the last month-ish, and there have been SO many exciting fics published. I just did a massive update to my to read page, and I can’t wait to DIVE IN!!!

These are all the fics I added:


Kim Namjoon.


Let me tell you a story… of a simpler time.

Once upon a time, there was a girl…

She fell in love with Im Jaebum and all was right in the world.

She had a bias wrecker named Mark Tuan who made life hard at times but things between her and her man were still great.

THEN… this girl found a one, Kim Namjoon. 

her life was shaken up by his beautiful lips, long ass legs, sexy as hell genius brain, iconic lyricism, and deep voice.

 It was hard to remain loyal, so she didn’t. But still, at the end of the day, Jaebum was her one and only.


The girl is drowning in her love for Park Chanyeol who managed to swipe her from Jaebum. BUT still, Jaebum is there ever present in her heart (secretly he’s still her ult).

Mark Tuan had been promoted to bias level and Joonie remained at a solid second place (behind a tied Yeol and Bummie).


that’s right, all. I think i may be equally in love with all 3 of them.

moral of the story.. Namjoon owns me.

^ there’s a fic for ya.

Stitched - Part 1

Part 2

Eisuke Ichinomiya. Kana despised that man. He took the last shred of happiness Kana had, all for himself. Never did Kana want to see him unless it was completely unavoidable. This was just that moment. Standing at the entrance to the Tres Spades, Kana knew this was a last resort option, but perhaps it was better than remaining at that place.

Hoisting the duffle bag up, Kana braved the decision and stepped into the hotel. It was early in the evening, but even so the lobby was still buzzing a fair bit. Ignoring the greetings of staff, and the few questioning glances, Kana made a beeline for the elevators.

Mashing the penthouse button, Kana groaned when the button didn’t light up. Muttering a few choice curses before exiting the elevator, Kana headed for the reception desk.

“I’m sorry the penthouse rooms are all completely booked.” The receptionist said, Kana had to hold back a scoff, knowing that was a lie, “I can offer you a suite on the 50th floor.”

“I don’t want a room I just need to get into the penthouse!” Kana demanded, smacking the top of the counter.

The outburst took the receptionist back a bit, and she seemed a little frightened.

“What seems to be the issue here?” Kana sighed happily at the familiar voice. Mr Kenzaki would surely help out. Upon turning to face the manager, Kenzaki immediately took it upon himself to guide Kana to the penthouse personally.

“I was under the impression you were given a key to the penthouse.” Kenzaki observed as they rode the elevator up.

“I refused to accept it.” Kana mumbled, almost ashamed to be running to the Tres Spades.

“Three times?”

“Whatever. I won’t be here long anyway.”

Upon reaching floor 51, Kenzaki stepped out but Kana didn’t, “I assume you came here for a reason?”

Sighing, Kana stepped out and followed Kenzaki to the penthouse lounge.

“Excuse me, Mr Ichinomiya?” Kenzaki announced before Kana even had a chance to enter.

“What is it Kenzaki? I don’t recall calling for you.” Eisuke called back. Kana sighed. He didn’t seem irritable. Good.

“I have a visitor with me.”

“Nor do I recall having a meeting.” Eisuke pointed out.

“He never said it was for you.” A voice Kana recognised as Ota’s called out.

Stepping aside, Kenzaki then let Kana enter.

“Kana?” The men in the lounge all exclaimed unanimously.

“I don’t believe Miss Kana is here to see either of you.” Kenzaki bowed before leaving. Clutching her bag awkwardly in front of her, Kana stared at her feet. Her last visit to the Tres Spades hadn’t exactly been spectacular.

“Hi.” She said shyly.

Before anyone could say anything more, shouting from upstairs interrupted them.

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHE’S GONE?” Silence followed before a woman stumbled quickly down the stairs from the penthouse suite, “Eisuke!” She exclaimed, tears already rolling down her face, “Kana she-” almost in sync with each other, the men all pointed behind her, where Kana now stood.

Without a second thought, dropping her bag, Kana also broke down into tears as she ran to the woman, who caught her in a tight embrace, “Kana.” The woman breathed out in relieve as she held the girl.

“Mum.” Kana cried into her chest.

Part 2

draganchitsa  asked:

hurt me: please write roslin's reaction to learning about what will happen after her wedding, like her going from "zomg i get to marry edmure tully" to ;.; thankssssssss

She has never seen Riverrun before.

She hears it is a fine castle, not so great as one would expect, but nestled comfortably between the forks of the river, the wealth of the land. She has never seen Edmure Tully, either – she had been too young when the heir of the Riverlands had first come of age and Roslin’s father had paraded his line of daughters before the Tullys, offering their choice as though his girls were nothing but plums for the picking. She had been too young at the time, but as she recalls Edmure Tully is not so old even now, and she need only look at her father and his newest wife to be glad of that.

They dress her in lace, delicate and flowing, and she has never felt so beautiful, never worn anything so fine. Everything she has owned before has always belonged first to a sister, to a cousin, to an aunt or a stepmother, and this is the first that is Roslin’s own.

Her father comes to see her, and she wants to duck her head reverently and hold it high at the same time – she will be the Lady of Riverrun, the highest lady of the Riverlands, and while her father is the maker of this great match, she wants only to show him that she can live up to the great station to which she has been called. I will bring honor to House Frey, she tells herself, and her lips quirk up in the slightest of smiles – family, duty, honor, they will be my words now.

Her father’s nails cut into her shoulders as he grasps her arms, his beady eyes meeting hers in the mirror. “Now, my girl, are you ready to play your part?” he demands, and though he is looking at her Roslin is suddenly aware of how little he sees her as nothing more than the reflection in the glass – not a girl or woman of flesh at all.

“Yes, father,” she says obediently, nevertheless. “I only hope to please Lord Edmure, and you.”

“You please him in the bedchamber, and I will be well-pleased indeed,” her father cackles, a sneer twisting his cracked lips, as though she has told a jape that she is too stupid to understand, as though she is, as ever, a step behind with her second-hand knowledge in her second-hand gowns.

TITLES TO KNOW TUESDAY: Holy Trinity Fanfic Edition (w.o. 10/29 - 11/11)

Whoops, it’s Wednesday #sorrynotsorry

Hello random internet browser! How nice of you to stumble into my lair of randomness and rainbow sprinkling gays. Oh yes, there’s plenty of both here and hopefully you’ll enjoy your stay. If you don’t, feel free to leave your complaint cards outside the cave entrance where they can blow away to find someone who might care to read them because unless you write it in some sort of lesbian romp situation, we here at dontlovemelikexo aren’t interested! Now that you know the rules, here is all the fic from the past two weeks that made me feel things. I hate feeling things, really, but it might be worth it for these magical pieces of prose. Robots forever! Past editions located here.

Disclaimer: The main ship I read is Hartbig but I also read Swace/Mace and other fantastically festive and far-fetched ships on occasion. (Oh, and total wohoo! for Grester/Swarto but I don’t read the fanfic) SHIP ALL THE SHIPS. These lists are always in random order. 

1. Open When: You’ve Left Me After Visiting: by fic-big (Hartbig)

It’s back! I have loved this Open When series for so long and there is finally an update to this magical set (and if you haven’t read her Note to Self you are seriously missing out - I mean, there is a lap dance, what more can you ask for!?). This story finds Hannah in the awkward position of being torn between two people she loves, Grace and well, her wife. Now now, before you judge, just think about how we all make bad choices sometimes and in this case, you want to cheer for the Hartbig side of things to work out but you also want to remember than there are other factors involved that don’t make it so easy. How do you choose between people you love, especially when the person you’ve left at home has no idea they are even in the competition? Grace isn’t making it easy on Hannah either, all sly smiles and laying on the flirt and then asking her to stay. Love’s a dangerous game and even though we’d all like it to be different, there’s always a winner and a loser. Stay tuned for part 2 to find out how this one goes!

Great lines: I’m the one that stood in behind her, next to Mamrie, as she pledged her love and life to this girl. I’m the one who started laying on the flirt thick the second they had their first fight, I’m the one who kissed her in hotel rooms while Mamrie was finishing up in the bathroom and behind stages at conventions when no one was around and it was too dark and loud to notice. Something had to give eventually.

2. Eyes on the Horizon: by onemilliongoldstars (Hartbig pirate AU)

This fic has made an appearance in these updates before but I feel like more of you need convincing that this is one of the greatest stories in the fandom. Trust me, I thought, umm ok pirates, sure Ray, great idea….BUT NO SERIOUSLY, IT IS! This story has such depth of character  - Grace seems to be nothing but a harsh and cut-throat pirate who is constantly being pushed up against the softness and sweetness of Hannah, but Hannah sees through the facade and gets to know the layers beneath the gritty exterior and Grace trusts her with some of the ghosts of her past but they can’t seem to find a way to coexist quite yet. They are always evolving, trying to each be themselves without hating the parts they don’t like in the other and really, it’s a strange and swashbuckling tale of treasure and chosen family and what it means to belong in the world. It’s perfection, truly. Let it sweep you away!

Great lines: No, I know that isn’t true. You’re not this bloodthirsty pirate, I’ve seen you be something more than that. The real Grace isn’t like this… she’s smart and kind.“ Her words catch in her throat and she lets out a soft, bitter laugh before continuing. "And stupid and headstrong and blinded by her fears. But she’s… you’re brave too Grace. You’re brave and caring and strong. And I know this isn’t you. I know you won’t kill an innocent little girl.”

3. Charades: by inhumanshield (Hartbig)

If you’re looking for an adorable piece of fluff, this is it! You know how sometimes you’re reading a fanfic and you just think, um ok, *insert character name here* would never say that. Great news! That doesn’t happen in this fic! And see in this world,  Grace Helbig has a crush, and a big one at that. It’s been tangling through her brain like a kitten with a ball of yarn on speed or something and she hasn’t quite been able to break free and admit it out loud yet. She’s going to tell her. Really she is. If only she could manage to get the words out without having some sort of nervous fit beforehand. This story will leave you with a smile on your face and heart googly eyes for sure.

Great lines: 
“So… Yeah. You know… how like… we did that thing and then… well - her hands were in front of her, straight fingers joining around her thumbs - and then we didn’t make anything of it, because friends do that, sometimes, and that’s fine really.” Her voice was cracking slightly. She raised her eyebrows looking at her own hands that were now floating one around the other in a circular movement. She quickly wrapped her thumbs inside her fists. Hannah was frowning, looking like she just saw a parade of naked male dancers. That shocked.

4. A Vial of Venom : by bottledoxygen (Hartbig)

This story really has to be read because it’s very old world AU but also, feels very not AU, if that makes any sense. Sometimes ambitions in life take use down paths we never expect and the people we meet along the way, somehow they can seem to know us better than we could ever really know ourselves. This is a story about the way life changes people and how circumstances are sometimes just the way things are, even when you wish things could be different.

Great lines: Besides,” Grace stared at a half-moon above, clean fingernails sinking like knives into easy, fibre-soft bark, as if the dirt getting onto her skin were petty revenge, “I don’t wear the ribbons, silly. I use them to bind my own books, to keep them shut. The gods know I’ve dog-eared too many pages and used every whore of a word or phrase in every paragraph to exhaustion to satisfy my own thirst for understanding. They refuse to be quieted now, though, since they seem to have held in their downpours of unreasonable passion and reasonable calm for so long; the rain just comes in the crinkled pages and the worn corners.”

5. Chasing the Sunset: by hartbig-in-onesies (Hartbig)

This is a bit of an abstract piece but when you think about the magical pink lemonade and the orange marmalade of sunsets and how they paint these colors in the light across people’s faces, and make everything seem different in just a single moment before the sun dips below the horizon. It’s like candlelight in a lot of ways, the light is the same as it always is but somehow, when you look across at someone you care about, they seem different too. Softer. All glowing angles and light in their eyes and rambling tones of secrets and coziness. There’s a reason people call that time of day "magic hour” and this little fic captures it brilliantly.

Great lines: The sky manages to be both really dark and really light at the same time. That’s perhaps the magic of a sunset. Hannah has always found it curious that the sky remains a single shade of clear blue throughout the day, when there is so much activity going on down here, and then just as people begin to settle down for the night, the sunset kicks in and an entire new realm of colours spill and merge across the skies.

Additional thoughts: 

Jay hartorotica has a Swarto multi-chapter All Too Well (19 chapters in all!) that’s two chapters in, but started out with a chapter in Aspen that made me absolutely SWOON because 1. adventures in the snow are always adorable and 2. it’s based on TAYLOR SWIFT’S SONG “ALL TOO WELL” and I don’t know if I can handle that kind of thing being brought to fruition in fanfiction form. Prepare the tissues and the scarves and the dancing around the kitchen in the refrigerator light because this one might just kill us all with feels!

Mrs. Wonder Kitten of @yotoobfiction is still torturing us all with London town and Love and Evasive Action AND I SWEAR TO G-D THERE HAS STILL BEEN NO MOUTH TOUCHING BETWEEN THE HARTBIG. STILL!!!! This is just a sanity check in with all of you. Are you ok? Do you need some tea and a nice blankie or something because this is some delicious torture?

And that’s all folks! I hope you enjoyed your time here at the gallery of fiction and sometimes fucking. Please refrain from touching any of the authors in inappropriate places, unless they have agreed to such arrangements beforehand, and in that case, do let us watch. Or not. That’s ok too. No one is a perv here, really. We all just really enjoy naked gyrating and sexy innuendo. Nothing to see here, move along! Eyes up here buddy.

Any recs for next week or have a favorite author you don’t think I’m reading? Send my way!

Rucas FanFiction Week 2016

Day 2

“With a kiss you can strip me defenseless”

Riley moved fast pace around her room, picking up things and throwing them in the box sitting the bay window.

The more she sped around, the faster she went and the more she threw into the box. The faster she moved the less time she had to stop and think and possibly break.

As she moved to walk past her bed she stopped when she saw what was draped over her pillow. Slowly walking over she picked up the denim jacket and held it tightly to her chest.

Lucas had given her that jacket on the bus on the way back from the ski lodge 3 years ago. She’d always found it cheesy how her parents had the same symbol, but in some ways it also made it much more special.


She jumped, slightly startled, turning to face the window where Lucas himself was climbing through.

His eyes moved between her clutching his jacket and the box full of his stuff he’d left here and things he’d given her in the last few years, before resting back on her sadly.

“What are you doing?”

“We may as well face the inevitable,” Riley replied bluntly, walking over and throwing the jacket on top of the box before continuing her search around her bedroom.

“Inevitable?” Lucas frowned, his eyes following her movements, “You’re being ridiculous!”

Riley threw the t-shirt she’d been holding down on the bed and whirled around to face him, “No Lucas you’re being ridiculous! It’s ridiculous to think that this will work!” she exclaimed.

“It’s ridiculous to think it won’t!” Lucas shot back, walking to stand in front of her, “I like to believe that we’re strong enough for this. So why don’t you?”

“Because it never works!” she replied in exasperation, “You just keep drifting and drifting until eventually you break up saying we’ll still be friends, but you never are!”

“And I don’t ever not want you in my life, I don’t ever want to experience how that feels.”

Lucas shook his head, “I’m not letting you do this, I’m not letting you just give up,”

“I’m not giving up,” Riley sunk down on the edge of her bed, “I just know that when you leave I’ll be here missing you every second and that’s going to break my heart,”

Lucas slowly moved so he was kneeling in front of her, looking at her with pain filled eyes, “God I’m going to miss you more than anything, but this is something I have to do,”

“I would be mad if you didn’t,” Riley laughed slightly despite the situation.

A small smile tugged at the blonde boy’s lips, “Of course you would,”

“I’m serious though Lucas,” she continued quietly, looking at him sadly, “I don’t want us to fall apart and lose each other,”


“No,” she stopped him, “This is what we have to do, we have to break up so you can follow your dream,” she wiped a tear from her eye.

Lucas swallowed the lump in his throat, searching her face for any kind of hope; his heart clenching like it always did when he saw Riley upset, especially if he was the cause. She didn’t even realise it but she was his dream as well.

A silence fell over the two of them for a few moments, before Lucas seemed to decide ‘fuck it’ and crashed his lips against her own. Riley reacted immediately, looping her arms around his neck and pulling him as close to her as possible, savouring every second in case it was the last.

When he finally pulled away they were breathing heavily, and he leaned his forehead against hers.

“God you always manage to do that,” Riley breathed out.

“What?” he murmured.

With a kiss you can strip me defenseless,

Lucas smiled softly, leaning back and tucking a piece of hair behind her ear, “You forgot one really important thing in all your so called ‘defenses’ anyway,”

Riley’s nose scrunched up in confusion, “What?”

“We have never been like everybody else.”

Day 1

anonymous asked:

heyy!!! could you rec some short, happy (like, no to light angst) fics? ty!!!

hi! Here are a few fics I read recently that were quite fluffy!

the magic that is you and me by scagnetism, Not Rated, 18k

This man who was a complete stranger only a few hours ago – who still is a complete stranger, really – has taken over his heart and mind and he wants to understand the way they orbit each other, the way they fit after barely any time has passed. He feels like he’s just come alive, like a new part of him he didn’t know existed has suddenly been awakened, and he wants to feel this forever, wants to ride the high for the rest of his life.

Or, the AU where Harry works at Jason Mraz’s avocado farm, Louis works for BuzzFeed, and they’ve only got a few hours to fall in love.

falling in love with you again by suspendrs, Not Rated, 4k

Harry is just so fucking cute, Louis can’t stand it sometimes, can’t understand how he got so lucky. His heart is doing backflips and all Louis can do is press even closer and cuddle Harry into his chest, burying his smile into his hair. He can’t remember a time when he loved this boy any more than he does right now at this very moment. He also knows for sure, though, that he’s never loved him any less.

Or, three times in which Louis fell in love with Harry all over again.

blind from this sweet, sweet craving by missandrogyny, Explicit, 31k

“So, I guess we’ll go?” Louis asks later, when Harry has calmed down and eaten his weight in Chinese food. He plays with this chopsticks, spearing another piece of chicken and pops it in his mouth. “I mean, I wouldn’t mind. We could make it an adventure.”

Harry observes him, watches him seated across from him on their old living room carpet, with a container of food on his lap. He’s fidgeting, avoiding meeting Harry’s gaze–he probably knows that Harry’s mad at him for ruining the one chance they had to get out of this situation. And he’s not wrong, Harry is definitely very mad. Harry wants to strangle him and castrate him and smack him upside the head.

But he’s also Harry’s best friend, and despite everything, despite all the fuck-ups and the plot twists and everything just not playing out the way it should, he’d still rather be stuck in this situation with Louis than any of the other boys. He’s got Harry’s back, and in a weird, abstract way, he knows they’ll be able to get out of this situation, together.

Harry sighs. “We’re going,” he says resignedly, his shoulders slumping.

Oh well. There are definitely worse ways to spend the weekend than pretending to be engaged to his best friend.

i just know i have found the place my heart belongs by scagnetism, Not Rated, 32k

“Gracie loves faeries, don’t you, little love?” Louis asks, cutting through Harry’s thoughts, and she spares a glance over her shoulder at her father, nodding quickly before looking back at the house and touching it with gentle fingers.

Harry looks up at him, and they share a small smile, Louis making him feel warm, warm, warm. “This is her house, and it’s my favorite thing in my shop,” Harry explains, and Louis crouches slightly so he can see it better.

“’S beautiful,” he murmurs, and Harry smiles appreciatively at him.

Harry looks at Gracie again, blonde hair falling into her face as she inspects the glittery house, and he instinctively tucks her hair back behind her ear. “I’ve never seen the faerie,” he says to her softly, “but sometimes, when it’s very quiet, I can feel her.” He closes his eyes, taking in a breath, just sitting like that for a few seconds for the effect. “That’s how I know she’s watching over me.”

Or, the one where Louis has a quiet little girl, Harry has a toy shop with a magic faerie house, and they were made to fall in love.

(x) We recced some more fluffy fics a while ago if you’re looking for more! Happy reading! :)

Okay so this au thing gave me an idea, and I’m gonna turn it into a small chaptered fic, but until then, here’s my headcannon.

All through high school and college, Connor dates girls. But yet, he never gets a second tattoo. The only tattoo on his body was his own. But he’d pretend. He’d take a picture of the girl he was dating’s tattoo behind her back and paint it on his hip, hidden where she’d only see it every once in a while. He knew why they weren’t showing up, but he didn’t want to admit it.
So he wears long pants and sweaters even in the summer, saying that he was just cold all the time, trying to hide the fact that the only tattoo he had was his own. He’s ashamed, everyone in his grade had at least one other. But not him.

And then there’s Troye. Troye, unlike Connor, has many, many tattoos. He also has many, many scars from when he tried to cut certain ones out of his skin. He’s had his heart broken time after time, he’s even broken someone else’s heart a few times. Needless to say, he’s had his fair share of pain.
But he flaunts the tattoos. Pretends that they aren’t signs of shame and pain to him. Wears tank tops and lets his bad boy reputation build. Because why fight it? It’s easier to block out his feelings than to let himself admit that he’s hurting.

And then they meet. They become close friends. Each of them shares their secret, Troye tearfully explaining his marks of pain and Connor shakily telling Troye that there’s not another tattoo on his body. Shakily coming out to Troye.

And then Connor falls for Troye. He can’t get over the boy. He hasn’t guarded himself against love, not like Troye, because he’s never had to. And the one day, he wakes up to his wrist tingling slightly. Practically falling out of bed, he turns on the light and inspects his wrist. There, plain as day, is a tattoo. It’s unmistakable. And Connor knows the owner. Troye.

But he hides it. He doesn’t say anything to the other boy, terrified of what will happen if he does. He knows Troye has been hurt many times over. He knows that the tattoos that litter his best friends body are signs of grief, not pride. And so he starts keeping his jackets on around even Troye, starts tensing up when Troye’s hand lingers too long on his sweater sleeve. He pretends that nothing is happening, pretends that he hasn’t fallen in love for the first time in his life.

It takes Troye a little bit longer to fall for Connor. He’s guarded his feelings. He’s stopped letting tattoos appear on his body. But yet, slowly but surely, he can’t stop letting his touch linger. He can’t stop stealing glances. And one night, he’s getting changed into a t-shirt and sweats and waiting for Connor to come over and he sees something that definitely wasn’t there before. Because there, on his right shoulder, is a mark that he’d seen only on Connor’s ankle. And he breaks down. Because he can’t be falling for his best friend, it’s just not possible. He can’t let his heart get broken again.

Connor, who has a key to Troye’s apartment, shows up and finds Troye crying in his flat. With gentle hands and careful words, he tries to comfort his best friend, but to no avail. Troye just keeps crying. He reaches out to put a hand on Troye’s shoulder, to try to comfort him, but Troye literally shoves him back. Because he can’t let Connor see him weak. He can’t let Connor know that he’s fallen in love. But as Connor falls back, Troye panics. He catches Connor’s hand, trying to save him from a hard fall. And as he does, Connor’s sweater sleeve rides up.

And there, plain as day, is Troye’s tattoo. Connor’s eyes widen, knowing that Troye saw it. And Troye freezes.

Because he’s been through this before.

And that’s all you get until the fic ;)