the gazette

Some choice GazettE lyrics
  • Tempt me by masturbation
  • reckless driving cucumber
  • it is cheesed with the power
  • I’m already dead, however I was saved with the rock
  • all of Silly God Disco tbh
  • n i g h t o f p u s s y
    • oooooooooooh yeah
  • it is your duty to train a slave waving a waist
  • Disappear with a sexual.
    • (That’s it. That’s the end of the line.)
  • I will walk together
Ruki and Reita discussing pubes on the radio

The theme of this month was “First Times,” or in Ruki’s words, “Virgin.”


Reita: *is already laughing* Okay I want to read something now, can I?

Ruki: Ah, yes.

Reita: A scary story.

Ruki: Ah–!

Reita: …Can I?

Ruki: Yeah, I mean, it’s summer right? Go ahead.

(*In Japan ppl say horror is good to read/watch in the summer bc it “gives u chills” and cools u down…i know)

Reita: Ok here I go

(sinister music starts playing)

Reita: “My ‘First Time’ story is getting a summer cut.”

(long pause)

(both start giggling) 

Reita: (laughing) “Recently…my friends were like (laughing) …you don’t trim…!?” (laughing) – Ok hold on a sec (laughing) 

Ruki: This is a scary story??

Reita: Nah (still laughing smh) My plan was to read it super seriously and you’d be like “This isn’t a scary story!!” (laughing) Sorry, it didn’t work. It’s not a scary story.

Ruki: Oh, it’s not!

Reita: (laughing) “My ‘First Time’ story is getting a summer cut. Recently I was talking with my friends about it, and they were like, ‘what, you don’t trim it!?’ and they were really surprised. Some people do V, I, Y, O, or permanent hair removal, but I’m all natural. ‘Nature.’” (*he says the word ‘Nature’ in English)

Ruki: Ahh HEHEHEHE

Reita: “But recently I learned that even out of natural girls, there are some who trim it and some who don’t do anything.” …Wait, how can you call it natural if you trim it? “My friends recommended I try it because it feels fresh/clean, so I did it myself and it feels really nice, it’s cool and breezy. I want more people to know about this, and I’ve been recommending it to all my natural friends. Which do you guys like – permanent removal, trim, or natural? This isn’t meant to be a dirty question btw.”

Ruki: Oh, it’s not dirty?

(both are thinking very quietly)

Ruki: …..What’s ‘O’?

Reita: Well, probably……..an ass…..sort of….situation…..I think.

Ruki: Ah-! …Wait is she talking about pubes?

Reita: Yes….it’s a dirty question.

Ruki: Yeah, eh…even if it wasn’t mean to be sexual.

Reita: But it is sexual.

(both laugh)

Reita: So, what do you think? Do you like permanent removal, natural, trimmed..?

Ruki: Ok so…..basically….natural is like….you’re just letting it grow all over?

Reita: Yeah, you’re just letting it grow naturally. 

Ruki: Hmmmm….and then there’s….I? Y?

Reita: V, I, Y, O.

Ruki: V…I….I (*he makes some comment about ‘I’ I don’t get it :c)

Reita: (bursts out laughing) No no no..!!! That’s not what it is!! What are you standing on your head!?

Ruki: HUHUHUHU

(both laugh) 

Ruki: Wait…are they asking which one we like?

Reita: Yes.

Ruki: But with ‘Nature’…

(Reita bursts out laughing again)

Ruki: Doesn’t it depend what it looks like?

Reita: Like ‘Nature,’ but there’s not much hair, or…there’s a lot of hair…

Ruki: Or like, brown hair…

Reita: (laughs) So you like natural? 

Ruki: Well, yeah, but….hmm……*mumbles* shhved psssy

Reita: What? 

Ruki: Hairless….I wonder what hairless [pussy] is like.

Reita: Oh, you don’t like it hairless?

Ruki: No, I don’t know.

Reita: Yeah, what’s it like (laughs)

Ruki: Does that count as a summer cut?

Reita: Isn’t that permanent removal? When it’s all smooth

Ruki: All smooth…I wonder what that’s like?

Reita: Well, people do do it. 

Ruki: Ahhhh….look at us talking about this all serious.

(both laugh)

Reita: Ur face (laughs)

Ruki: But yeah hmm I don’t know…for girls…they must feel like they don’t really need it there.

Reita: I don’t know…if they need it or not idk man

Ruki: Well I mean, girls shave their armpit hair too, you know? Probably not their face….oh, do you know any girls who have facial hair?

Reita: Huh? I don’t know.

Ruki: My class president…was a girl. But she had a beard. 

Reita: What, like baby hair?

Ruki: Yeah, a beard of baby hair. 

Reita: But as she got older it probably went away.

Ruki: Oh really…why do u even know that?

Reita: (laughs) …So which are u bitch take a side!!

Ruki: Ehh take a side…….

Reita: You don’t want to?

Ruki: Yeah…hmmmm….I guess ‘V’. 

Reita: No, not that. You have to choose from three. Hairless, natural, or trimmed

Ruki: Oh, trimmed, trimmed. 

Reita: Oh, trimmed? Okay, so like –

Ruki: Trimmed, but also natural. 

Reita: Oh, a natural trim.

Ruki: Hairless, like…..no way. Never. 

At this point they compare bald pussies to the following:

Ruki: But yeah I have to go with trimmed. Or shaved a bit just to give it a nice shape.

Reita: You’re like picking all of them!

Ruki: Yeah I don’t really care tbh.

Reita: (laughs) Tru.

Ruki: What about you?

Reita: Whatever makes her more embarrassed. If she’s more embarrassed without hair, I want her without hair. If she’s more embarrassed with hair, I-I…want her with hair. 

Ruki: What about like, she only shaves the middle like [this guy]

Reita: Omg stop…like u put some designs in there

(both laughing) 

Ruki: We sound like perverted old men now 

Reita: We do?

Ruki: Yeah we’re getting too excited

Reita: No no no, when perverted old men talk about it they’re just being pervs, we are talking about it in artistic way.

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True friendship is not when you help you friend when he’s down - it’s when you stop, point, and laugh.