the four horseman of the apocalypse

One. Famine is a teenage girl, sipping cappucino foam through the holes of her gas mask. Her eyes are hidden behind tainted black; when you pass her, you see the bright reflection of something red behind the glass. You saw it, but it did not happen. Two. Hundreds of people in the streets are bawling but one of them stays silent. He wears the oil-greased overall of the workshop around the corner. It reads Conquest. His teeth are razor sharp and glisten in the dying sun above. It reminds you of a butter knife. You blink and he’s gone. Three. Four men in posh busniess suits drop dead to the earth. A middle aged lady looks at you with a knife in her hand and a gun at her hip. Someone far away calls out for her. Her name is something British, but you’re sure they called her War. She throws her head back and starts to laugh. It chills you to the bones. Four. An old man smiles at you from a park bench while he throws rotten corn at the pigeons. You realize the pigeons are actually vultures. When you look at the old man again, Death looks back at you. It doesn’t matter. The world around you is already dead.

the four horsemen of the apocalypse, re-imagined as vigilantes in a post apocalyptic setting | r.m

Day 2 is a centaur and @tinkerinks made me want to keep him by saying hes one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse lmao

Bowser :: Conquest/pestilence
Conquest over Mario in Paper Mario/pretty much causing a plague of black paint in Color Splash’s Port Prisma.
Peach :: War
Peach as the Shadow Queen would have cast a global war and probably win due to her (initial) invincibility.
Luigi :: Famine
Bit of a stretch but Luigi being starved of recognition by almost everyone, and then becoming a part of Super Dimentio, which was slowly starving away the universe of its liveness.
Mario :: Death

I’m just saying, if Mario doesn’t get possessed by a demented force to cause an apocalypse in the next Paper Mario I’m gonna do it myself.

Why are the gods so displeased that they have sent the four horseman of the apocalypse into the wlw community?

Conquest : Queerbaiting and badly written shows.
War : Division in the community over petty shipping wars
Famine : Lack of good representation or 3 minutes of screen time.
Death : literal death to wlw characters. rip.