the food that keeps saving the world

Justice League, Meet The Avengers

Batsy has created a chatroom.

Batsy has added Alfredo Pasta.

Batsy: Alfred.

Alfredo Pasta: Yes, Master Bruce?

Batsy: Was it Barry or Oliver this time?

Alfredo Pasta: It was the young speedster, Master Bruce.

Batsy has added Bear.

Batsy: Stop. Changing. Our. Names.

Bear: Alfredo Pasta, you snitched on me?

Alfredo Pasta: No regrets, son.

Alfredo Pasta: Was there something you needed, Master Bruce?

Batsy: I want to know the current status of the rest of the league.

Alfredo Pasta: Inviting them over for dinner? I shall prepare the table.

Batsy: No - a meeting that involves food, Alfred!

Bear: Ooooh are we having Lobster Thermidor? Arthur won’t like that.

Bear: I’ll be back in a… Flash. Gotta take care of my good pal Captain Cold.

Bear has left the chat.

Alfredo Pasta: It seems all members of the JLA are currently preoccupied.

Batsy: Even Clark? What could Arthur be doing? And Diana?

Alfredo Pasta: Saving the world, of course.

Alfredo Pasta: Except for Arthur. He’s at an aquarium.

Batsy: Are there any criminals out?

Alfredo Pasta: I’m afraid not, Master Bruce. Master Dick has done an exceptional job of keeping them at bay.

Batsy:

Batsy: What’s the Joker up to?

Alfredo Pasta: He’s in hiding after your last debacle with him.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Another tale about Steve's honorary mob membership, please? That was so good.

I have two asks like this so this one is going to be a flashback and the other will address what was asked specifically.  I’m so glad everyone liked that fill so much!

~~~

Steve really liked puzzles: crosswords and riddles and math.  He was good at them.  He was good at cyphers, too.  One of the doormen at the dancehall would hand him a slip of paper each week when he and Bucky went dancing; their orders for the week.   

Mostly, it was arranging pick ups and drop offs, a speakeasy placing an order and Steve communicating with the supplier to arrange delivery through Bucky, or taking empties back to the supplier for reuse.  They got a whole ten percent of anything they moved.  

Last month, they’d managed to pay rent and for all of Steve’s medicine with what they earned.  

Mostly, it was pick ups and drop offs.  Sometimes, it was collections.  This time, the note was for three collections: two speakeasies and one private purchaser.  

Steve groaned.  It was likely the private purchaser would cost them what they’d managed to save in the past couple of months on hospital bills for Bucky.  Private parties were never reasonable.   Speakeasies usually just forgot and were happy to pay for the trouble of providing some of the only liquor around.  Private parties were just entitled and angry.  

***

“What’ve we got?”  Bucky swaggered slow and loose beside Steve on their walk home from the dancehall.   

“Three house calls.  Two clean, one messy.”

Bucky tsked.  “Didn’t realize it was that late in the month.”  He smoothed a hand over his jaw; the last private collection had cracked one of his teeth and they’d only just gotten it fixed.  “We really gotta renegotiate our take on house calls, pal.” 

Steve nodded.  “Next month. We’ll have pulled the biggest numbers for six months straight by then and we’ll have something to bargain with.”

Bucky hummed.  “Just don’t make the deal without me there, ok? I’m your heavy, not theirs.”

Steve grinned, and tucked the week’s work into his pocket.  “Yeah, Buck.”

My revenge on Loony Lucy, contender for World's Worst Roommate.

Bring your popcorn, because this is a long one.

Loony Lucy is a slovenly, food-stealing, clothing-destroying waste of carbon. I dealt with it by keeping my space clean and ignoring her areas, storing my food at work or my boyfriend’s place, and installing a lock on my bedroom door so she couldn’t “borrow” outfits that “looked like she could fit into” when she had 30 pounds on me.

All that made Loony Lucy a bad roommate, but I had my work-arounds and she had the one saving grace of being Quiet At Night. So I put up with it.

I put up with it, that is, until she broke our Cardinal Roommate Rule: no one gets a key to the apartment without both roommates agreeing. The rule was sacred; I couldn’t even give a key to my boyfriend of more than a year.

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anonymous asked:

shinee has a movie marathon ^^ shinee goes to the beach/pool or both :)

i’ll have to get back to the movie marathon one! here’s shinee goes to the beach for you anon! :)

onew:

  • wears a straw hat that makes him look like luffy from one piece
  • sipping on piña coladas
  • sunburned af bc he fell asleep  in the sun for like 2 hours and now he has a very weird sunglasses tan (key: tragic. minho: *high pitched hysterical laughter in the background*)
  • buys a lot of beach merch like those caps and shirts and cups they sell with the beach name
  • ventured down into the water to wade, immediately knocked over by a wave
  • is digging a really deep hole with his hands

jonghyun:

  • brought giant speakers for his funky tunes it is not sandproof which is why it’s in a ziplock freezer bag 
  • runs away from key when he tried to put sunscreen on him
  • cannot order a sex on the beach without giggling (minho, onew, jonghyun: sex! sex! sex! on the beach!!)
  • unironically owns a towel with a giant picture of his own face on it (it says JONGHYUN in huge letters on the back, it is truly truly obnoxious) on which he rolls around reading a book
  • brought chunks of watermelon to eat
  • tried to save a child who was not actually drowning
  • still v embarrassed never bring that up ever

key:

  • big floppy hat and sunglasses are a given (tae: you look like a satellite / key: bc i’m out of this world bich) 
  • lots o sunscreen
  • boardwalk food!!!!!! fries and ketchup are the best by the sea
  • secretly tries to throw popcorn into jonghyun’s mouth bc he opens it while he sleeps, it’s 10 points for every shot he makes in (”yes 20 points!!”)
  • takes a hotdogs or legs pic 
  • is a shell hoarder (srsly key we can’t keep bringing two bags of shells you never do anything with) 

minho:

  • his shirt says suns out guns out but he thows it off the second he sees the water
  • lowkey flexing the whole time
  • lectures everyone about riptides before he lets anyone go swim 
  • the lifeguard blew the whistle at him twice bc he tried to dunk key so hard he almost drowned & bc he sat on jonghyun’s chest and started to bury his head
  • lost 48 dollars to a claw machine
  • no one will play beach volleyball with him bc they know how he gets and onew can only handle so many concussions 

taemin:

  • “hey!!!!!!!!! look at this sandcastle i made” / shinee: we’re so proud of our son
  • brought an inner tube shaped like a flamingo to float on
  • minho had to swim after him a few times so that he doesn’t get lost at sea bc he’s just drifting out there….. aimlessly… with no regards to his whereabouts 
  • also has a water gun with him that he uses to spray minho’s head as he tries to haul his ass back to shore  
  • wants to rent a jetski, settles for dip n dots
Casting Call

Pairing: Henry Cavill x Reader

Request: Hi! Wanted to request a smut fic with Henry Cavill. With some fluff! I trust the details to you :3

Description: Y/N Visits Henry while filming and and sees him in costume and wants to move the acting into the bedroom. 

Smut: Yes

Words: 1741

Requests are open!

Masterlist

Originally posted by henricavyll

Keep reading

solartumble  asked:

Here is a simple yet deep question: Why do rogues / thieves steal in D&D and other settings? At some point they have more than enough gold to buy everything they desire, so what would keep them going? All I can think of would be the adrenaline.

There are many many answers to this question, which is indeed simple yet deep. :) Here are a few:

  • Hey, did you know that in early D&D editions, coins looted were converted to XP gained, at a 1:1 ratio? Few play with that rule any more, but the mentality hasn’t died out completely. :)
  • To an extent, rogues keep stealing for the same reason adventurers keep adventuring - and looting corpses and robbing graves and emptying dungeons from their valuables.
  • For the players, quite simply because that’s the game. (At least if they choose to play like that, it’s not obligatory; common, yes, obligatory no.)
  • For the characters, motives range from “because we’re greedy assholes”, to “we got to cover the expenses of this expedition” to “we have no idea how to make a living like normal people” to “we need these expensive items to save the world, so we need gold to buy them”.
  • As your station/level rises, so do your expenses. At lvl 1 all you need is food, ammunition, and a bit of ale. Then you get enough coin to buy a potion, and you buy it, and whoops, you’re broke again. Then you get some more money, and spend it on fancy sword. And so on. At high levels, you may need gold to build a keep, pay contacts, bribe officials, buy a ship - that’s a lot of bling! And if you can go to the Magic Mart and buy better and better magic items, well, you can guess where all that money goes.
  • People in general don’t seek wealth just to survive. They also seek it to show off, gain power and influence, attract a mate, groom an heir, fill the void in their cold empty hearts - lots of reasons, and these are just the selfish ones.
  • Rogues don’t have to keep stealing at higher levels, and often don’t. They can use their skills just for adventuring (infiltrate a cult, steal an artifact, sleight of hand the hierophant’s unholy symbol, forge some important documents).
  • The thrill of the heist is a pretty big deal actually. :)
  • I once had a character who began her life of crime by stealing apples. Several levels and buckets of gold later, she’d stopped thieving altogether except for missions, and would buy everything she needed, leaving large tips and all. But she never payed for apples, she always stole those. She didn’t need to, but it was a quirk, a reminder, a little rite that asserted her sense of identity.
  • Our sense of identity beats our common sense every fucking time.
  • It’s a great sense of achievement and self-worth to evolve from a street rat who cuts purses and palms rings to an accomplished cat-burglar who fears no guards or magical alarms and specialises in art heists.
  • Still in the Thieves’ Guild? They still want their cut.
  • Sometimes you just get that irrational urge to out-bling Strahd. (True story, that one).

(image credits: Sia-chan)

history of the entire world, I guess starters (pt 2)
  • ❛  Wanna get enlightened in the middle of no where ?  ❜
  • ❛  Surprise ! You’re the new Roman Emperor.  ❜
  • ❛  They go north, from the north to the northern north.  ❜
  • ❛  They also invade some other places and get called many names.  ❜
  • ❛  Ok, fair enough.  ❜
  • ❛  It’s actually Germany, but don’t worry about it.  ❜
  • ❛  Christianize all the kingdoms !  ❜
  • ❛  Which brand would you like ?  ❜
  • ❛  Mine’s better.  ❜
  • ❛  Time to conquer England.  ❜
  • ❛  It’s a bird ! It’s a plane ! It’s the Seljuk Turks !  ❜
  • ❛  Yes, I do actually want to do that.  ❜
  • ❛  They did many crusades, some of which almost didn’t fail.  ❜
  • ❛  Look at those mounds.  ❜
  • ❛  I always wondered how to build a town in a cliff.  ❜
  • ❛  I bet that will last a long time.  ❜
  • ❛  Is it Tonga Time ? I think it’s Tonga Time.  ❜
  • ❛  He’s so rich, he’s going on tour to let everyone know.  ❜
  • ❛  Wow, that guy’s rich.  ❜
  • ❛  Please remain Christian, we will check in later to see if you’re still Christian when you least expect.  ❜
  • ❛  Whoops, half of Europe just died.  ❜
  • ❛  It’s kinda like a rebirth.  ❜
  • ❛  So you think you can conquer the Byzantine Empire ?  ❜
  • ❛  Oops, you missed a spot.  ❜
  • ❛  What ? That’s bullshit !  ❜
  • ❛  Well I guess we’ll have to find another way to India.  ❜
  • ❛  said Christopher Columbus, probably smoking crack.  ❜
  • ❛  Nah, don’t worry we already got this.  ❜
  • ❛  So he sails into the ocean, and discovers more ocean.  ❜
  • ❛  (name) wants to make Russia great again.  ❜
  • ❛  Do you sin ?  ❜
  • ❛  Now you can buy your way out of Hell.  ❜
  • ❛  That’s bullshit. This whole thing is bullshit. That’s a scam.   ❜
  • ❛  Here’s 95 reasons why.  ❜
  • ❛  But they pillaged it anyway.  ❜
  • ❛  We gotta start pillaging some stuff.  ❜
  • ❛  Question one: can you get to India through North America ?  ❜
  • ❛  No, but at least there’s beaver.  ❜
  • ❛  That’s not a question.  ❜
  • ❛  (name) and (name) are having a friendly discussion about who should control the entire world.  ❜
  • ❛  More specifically: Ohio.  ❜
  • ❛  ‘Fuck you !’ says America.  ❜
  • ❛  Let’s overthrow the palace and cut all their heads off !  ❜
  • ❛  No, don’t.  ❜
  • ❛  Why didn’t we think of this before ?  ❜
  • ❛  Luckily they banished him to an island, but he came back.  ❜
  • ❛  So (name) tried to get them addicted to opium, which worked, actually.  ❜
  • ❛  That’s just where he lives.  ❜
  • ❛  Technology is about to go crazy !  ❜
  • ❛  It’s bad, they decided.  ❜
  • ❛  Well blame something on them and go to war !  ❜
  • ❛  Now we’re in business.  ❜
  • ❛  It’s gonna be a great war, so great we won’t need a second one.  ❜
  • ❛  It just seemed like the right thing to do.  ❜
  • ❛  The economy’s great and it’ll probably be great forever !  ❜
  • ❛  They should probably just deny it.  ❜
  • ❛  Finish him !  ❜
  • ❛  Seems legit.  ❜
  • ❛  I’m going to starve myself in public.  ❜
  • ❛  Wow, that worked ?  ❜
  • ❛  What’s on the menu ?  ❜
  • ❛  They’re having a friendly debate over which economic system is good and which one is an evil virus of satan.  ❜
  • ❛  They both have atom bombs.  ❜
  • ❛  Fight ! wait, no that would be the end of the world.  ❜
  • ❛  Let’s just keep it cool and spy on each other instead.  ❜
  • ❛  I’ll race you to space !  ❜
  • ❛  That might keep happening.  ❜
  • ❛  I bet they’ll remember that.  ❜
  • ❛  Wanna learn everything ?  ❜
  • ❛  Whoops, the economy just crashed.  ❜
  • ❛  Don’t worry the big banks won’t fail because they’re not supposed to.  ❜
  • ❛  Surprise ! Flying robots ! With bombs !  ❜
  • ❛  Wanna print a brain ?  ❜
  • ❛  Some people have no friends.  ❜
  • ❛  Some people have no food.  ❜
  • ❛  The globe is warming and the ocean is full of plastic.  ❜
  • ❛  Let’s save the planet !  ❜
  • ❛  By the way, where the hell are we ?  ❜
Well (Wonwoo)

Word Count: 3k+

Summary: when your son overhears a fight that ensues between you and your husband, wonwoo, little jaemin asks his father an important question the very next day. // angst + fluff

Requested by: an anon! thank you so much~ hope you enjoy! this is kind of long, sorry ;; i talk too much


Originally posted by woanu

Your name: submit What is this?

It was times like these where you just wanted to curl up in bed and cry or scream into the cotton feel of your pillowcase. When the house was as silent as the library you used to confine yourself in during university, where you first met the young man that’d soon become the love of your life, the father of your child. Where he was right now…..well, of course you knew. He was at work- making a living to support you and your son, Jaemin.

But that’s exactly why you wanted to scream: it wasn’t supposed to be this way. You weren’t supposed to be spending nights alone, you weren’t supposed to be sleeping by yourself while the other side of the mattress grew cold from lack of body warmth. You weren’t supposed to be reading to Jaemin every single night, for your child wanted his father to read to him as well, it was an activity that was meant to be shared.

Jaemin. You weren’t supposed to be making empty promises to him that Wonwoo would come home tonight. You weren’t supposed to be looking into those innocent brown eyes and reassuring him that Wonwoo loved you both. No. That wasn’t how a family was supposed to work.

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THE LIGHTNING THIEF MUSICAL STARTERS.


( feel free to change the pronouns as you please! )

❛ the gods are real. ❜
❛ those kids have issues. ❜
❛ you never listen to me! ❜
❛ i didn’t want to cause trouble… ❜
❛ dude, what was that? ❜
❛ why do you have peanut butter in your hair? ❜
❛ dude, i’m your only friend. ❜
❛ hey, don’t talk about my mom / dad! ❜
❛ this was your final warning. ❜
❛ you think i’m trouble. just like everybody else. ❜
❛ yeah, well, i’m sorry i let you down. ❜
❛ yeah, he sounds like a real winner. ❜
❛ he didn’t have a choice. ❜
❛ everyone has issues they’re dealing with. ❜
❛ if you’re weird, you’re weak. ❜
❛ the things that make you different are the very things that make you strong. ❜
❛ you’re destined for great things. ❜
❛ yes, ____, you are special. ❜
❛ be strong. ❜
❛ when i say run…run. ❜
❛ i love you so much. ❜
❛ don’t pass out! ❜
❛ am i dead? ❜
❛ i must be dreaming. ❜
❛ you drool in your sleep. ❜
❛ oh. you’re alive. ❜
❛ yeah, and i half-care. ❜
❛ oh, great, she’s crying. ❜
❛ the best thing to do is break up with the guy. ❜
❛ what are you doing here? ❜
❛ i need a drink. ❜
❛ you mustn’t blame yourself. ❜
❛ no one can blame you for holding a grudge. ❜
❛ you’re gonna be fine. ❜
❛ it’s gonna be bloody murder she wrote. ❜
❛ i’ll put you in your place. ❜
❛ is the food here really that bad? ❜
❛ …and i ran away. ❜
❛ wait, is that true? ❜
❛ things couldn’t be worse when your parents run the universe. ❜
❛ i got a fern in some dumb mason jar. ❜
❛ she steals my mascara and all of my dates! ❜
❛ if i tried to sing, i’ll probably cause an avalanche. ❜
❛ we’re all friends here. ❜
❛ he’s doing it wrong. ❜
❛ is anyone up here? hello? ❜
❛ approach, and face your destiny. ❜
❛ you shall be betrayed by one who calls you friend. ❜
❛ you shall fail to save what matters most. ❜
❛ everything i ever do is wrong. ❜
❛ i never try to do anything. i never mean to hurt anyone. ❜
❛ i swear that i’m a good kid. ❜
❛ guess i’m good for nothing at all. ❜
❛ the only family that mattered, well —— she vanished into the air. ❜
❛ no ever ever tells me that they’re proud. ❜
❛ all i need is one last chance. ❜
❛ i’m good enough for someone. ❜
❛ you’re my best friend, dude. ❜
❛ if you’re going to save the world, i’m the best person to keep you from messing up. ❜
❛ ____, are you coming too? ❜
❛ don’t get eaten by monsters. ❜
❛ we just exploded a bus! ❜
❛ all our food was in there…all our clothes were in there…all our food was in there! ❜
❛ we’re lost, and it’s cold, and it won’t stop raining! ❜
❛ we’re lost in the woods! ❜
❛ it’s not safe to stay out here in the open. ❜
❛ how are we gonna survive? ❜
❛ you hurt his feelings. ❜
❛ tell the squirrel you’re sorry. ❜
❛ i think the gods are trying to tell me they hate me. ❜
❛ the world is freaking awful. ❜
❛ do you ever even listen? ❜
❛ my grand plan is that i will be remembered. ❜
❛ i intend to stand my ground. ❜
❛ i will be great. just wait and see. ❜
❛ look how far we’ve come; we can’t give in! ❜
❛ people are counting on us. ❜
❛ i’m counting on you. ❜
❛ no fates are ever gonna cut our string. ❜
❛ if you hadn’t bought all those dam snacks —— ❜
❛ i was hungry! ❜
❛ why are we fighting? ❜
❛ i never felt like i was worth a damn. ❜
❛ i need a place to sleep. ❜
❛ are you sure that’s a good idea? ❜
❛ sacrifice is necessary to remake the world. ❜
❛ maybe if i’d been a little bit braver…maybe if i’d stayed behind to fight —— ❜
❛ “maybe” doesn’t let me go back and save her. ❜
❛ “maybe” doesn’t make it alright. ❜
❛ here’s a tip: you ain’t gettin’ out. ❜
❛ what do you think of my song? ❜
❛ you’re dead! ❜
❛ you ain’t ever gonna save what matters. ❜
❛ you ain’t ever gonna protect your friends. ❜
❛ you ain’t ever gonna be remembered. ❜
❛ this is where your story ends. ❜
❛ what belongs to the sea can always return. ❜
❛ that’s life, and life ain’t fair. ❜
❛ i’ll come back for you ____, i promise! ❜
❛ he’ll have to go through me. ❜
❛ i’ll make this right. ❜
❛ i’m gonna wipe that stupid head off of your stupid face. ❜
❛ ugh! what’s my deal? ❜
❛ where do you go when it’s over? ❜
❛ whatever! ❜
❛ sometimes, family is worth the trouble. believe me. ❜
❛ i’ve barely seen you since i got back. you avoiding me? ❜
❛ it’s time to make the world our own. ❜
❛ i don’t care if i hurt anyone. ❜
❛ it doesn’t pay to be a good kid. ❜
❛ things will be bad before they get better. ❜
❛ are we ever gonna once have it easy? ❜
❛ there’ll be times when your faith is shaken. ❜
❛ when it’s time to rise and stand your ground, we don’t have to go it alone. ❜
❛ i’ll make mistakes, but my own. and it frees me. ❜
❛ i’ll be back next summer. ❜

Drama Squad AU: The Apocalypse

Their school wasn’t the only place to be influenced by the SQUIP, unfortunately it did not end well for everyone else and the SQUIP has been slowly taking over the world. By the time it reached New Jersey again the group end up on their own and are now wandering from place to place, trying to escape the virus. Jeremy and Michael have been preparing for this moment their whole lives, from videogames to comics they know how this stuff works. Christine might literally be MacGyver​, prepared for anything and having to save the group’s collective ass more times than can be counted. The world may have ended but Chloe and Brooke refuse to lose their fashion sense, scavaging for not just makeup and clothing but the necessary supplies like food and water. Brooke is now starting to regret quitting the Track Team. Rich and Jake may be the physically strongest of the group but they are also the two biggest idiots, needing the most saving. Without the group the two probably would have gotten themselves killed a long time ago. Jenna keeps the group from killing each other, which is a almost godlike feet. Hormonal teenagers alone and a post-apocalyptic state do not mix well together.

A general tip about CAW....
  • CAW likes to crash
  • It hates you
  • It will hate you even more if you try to run it with your normal The Sims 3 folder with all your CC
  • So make a clean save, and run CAW only with that
  • Also save OFTEN, and don’t save more than twice without restarting CAW in between
  • Otherwise it often crashes while saving
  • NEVER save your world under one name, keep like 6 versions and cycle save!!!
  • If you wanna build in EIG, I advise saving lots to the bin before saving in EIG, just in case it hates you
  • Make sure you have plenty of comfort food at hand, you will need it….

anonymous asked:

Thanks for writing the angst it fuels me! If you have time maybe Jason annoying the team cause he gets super smug if billy wears his clothes or the color red!

:D (Possessive trope is my jam, my dude, thank)


If their lives were a 90′s superhero show, they’d probably be caught wearing their Ranger colours a lot more. Jason tried really hard to imagine an all red wardrobe.

He couldn’t.

It was just way too damn tacky.

Billy seemed to be embracing it though. Unintentionally though. That was obvious enough. What with his accidental grabbing of blue plates and blue binders and blue pens at every available moment. Jason wondered if he’d ever noticed or if he was just completely unaware every time.

Everyone else’s colours, including Jason’s, weren’t ever considered though. Purple, never black. Orange, never yellow. Or red. No pink either.

Just blue.

It was kinda cute how closely tied he’d become to his Ranger form.

So when Billy walked into Trini’s room, his blue bag already sliding off to the floor and blue sneakers squeaking across the floor, Jason grinned and filed the mental image of it all way for the billionth time.

And then he realized that Billy was wearing his shirt.

Not any shirt.

His red Ranger one. A joke gift that Kim had given everyone. A shirt for their Ranger.

And Billy was wearing it.

“Uh… nice shirt, Billy,” Kim said Zack’s lap. “Isn’t that… Jason’s?”

Billy’s bag hit the floor, loud. He pulled out his shirt, looking at the image like he wasn’t even aware of what he’d put on that morning. He glanced back at Kim and smiled. “Yes, it is.”

Kim ducked her head, smiling. Behind her, Zack was grinning loose and wild. Billy didn’t seem to notice their overly amused looks as he glanced at Jason, who was staring at him. “I found it in my bag yesterday. You probably have my jacket.”

“Uh-” Jason’s voice cracked. “Y-yeah. Probably, Billy.”

Billy frowned. “Do you want me to take it off?”

And Jason was spiraling across the bed, frantic “No!” echoing out of his mouth, loud, until he was standing up in front of Billy, close, close, close up to him. He relaxed at Billy’s alarmed look and laughed, rubbing the back of his neck. “No, no, it’s fine, Billy. You look-” Like you’re mine. “-good.”

Billy smiled bright. “Okay!” He scratched the inside of his wrist. “Trini said to help her with the cookies once I got up here so I’m going to go now.”

“Okay, Billy,” Jason murmured, ducking quickly to give him a brief kiss on the cheek.

Billy bumped his hand against Jason’s, soft and fleeting, like he did when he was pleased and wanted to be romantic but wasn’t up for anything public. They watched him leave. Jason licked his lips. In the back of his mind, he was working out how difficult it’d be to get Billy to wear more of his clothes or just more red.

Blue and red.

Nothing else.

Or maybe just all red, all the time.

“Well…” Zack chuckled, wrapping his arms around Kim’s chest. “That was new.”

“Yeah,” Kim laughed.

“You think he’d wear my shirt if I asked?”

“No!” Jason snapped, a burst of jealous rage pounding through him. It was quick and left him dazedly lightheaded. He flushed, halfway embarrassed. “I mean-”

“Relax, J-Man.” Zack stuck his hands up, defensive. “I don’t want your boy. Got my special girl.” He licked a stripe up Kimberly’s neck, that left her shrieking and swatting him, partially annoyed.

She rolled out of his lap and gave him a look to which he grinned wildly. Rolling her eyes, she turned to Jason and crossed her arms. “I never struck you for the possessive type.”

“I’m not possessive,” Jason huffed. “I just-” He swallowed thickly, refusing to meet their knowing eyes. “He wouldn’t look good in black, that’s all.”

“That’s racist,” Zack said and Jason rolled his eyes.

“Whatever, Zack. It’s a one-time thing.” Jason rolled up his sleeves. “He literally only wears his colour. No one else’s. I don’t think Billy’s gonna detract from that routine.”


Maybe it was God trying to punish him for bitch-slapping so many villains into space or maybe it was God trying to thank him for that but Billy wore a lot more red and a lot more of Jason’s clothes over the next few weeks. It was easy enough to understand. They’d both bring over a change of clothes whenever they slept over the other’s house (which was slowly becoming an every weekend thing) and Billy would just accidentally grab something of Jason’s and put it on the next day without thinking.

Except for the part where it was increasingly happening all the time with clothes that didn’t fit Jason’s bulkier frame anymore. Stuff that had been pushed to the back of his closet to be forgotten until spring cleaning and clothes drives.

And everything was red.

Everything Billy took was red and Jason knew, just like they’d all knew, that he didn’t own a large array of red clothing. An all-red wardrobe was tacky and Jason preferred variance. And not looking tacky.

Which meant that Billy was looking for this stuff.

Which meant that Billy either planned it all along or had noticed Jason’s really and very-much-into-it behaviour when it came to his Ranger shirt the first time and was trying to make Jason lose his damn mind.

And Jason couldn’t find his Red Ranger shirt anymore and was convinced that Billy had just pretty much stolen it despite how much the other boy denied it. He didn’t mind, of course. Vanity was never really part of Jason’s style but…

He wondered if it was vain to be incredibly turned on and smug every time Billy wore his colours and his clothes.

Trini seemed to think so.

“If you keep drooling on my food, I’m gonna kill you next time we train,” she threatened, pushing away their shared fries.

Jason was staring at Billy, who was walking over, completely forgone all other colours and just shrouded in red.

And he was wearing Jason’s Red Ranger shirt again.

With the back of his hand, Jason wiped his mouth and stood up. Maybe it was simulation of punishment and reward. Reward for doing good and saving the world. Punishment for being so openly turned on by Billy.

At this rate, Jason really couldn’t care.

Billy bumped their hands together and smiled softly, knowingly, as he walked off towards the food truck with Kim at his side. Kim who glanced over her shoulder and sent Jason a mildly disgusted look before turning back.

“He knows,” Jason whispered.

“Of course he knows,” Zack grunted. He swung his leg over the bench and snatched some of Trini’s fries. “You make such a gross display about it.”

Billy’s red pants were fitting rather snug over the curve of his ass, Jason noted as he said, without much focus, “Uh huh.”

Really, really tight.

Jason licked his lips and grabbed his bag. “Hey, so, um, I gotta go. And Billy- probably-” He rubbed his hand through his hair, tryning to think when Billy glanced back at them and grinned, low and like the fucking Devil.

He waved happily at them. In the sunlight, Jason could see his nails glinted a polished red.

Jason grit his teeth. “I’ll call you guys later.”

“Please don’t,” Trini muttered as Jason stalked off and caught Billy around the waist. Billy grinned, mouth reddened every so slightly by his watermelon smoothie

So maybe an all-red wardrobe wasn’t totally tacky.

Just… only on Billy.

Only ever on Billy.


On AO3 as well!

anonymous asked:

I need to know more about your super soccer moms.

Ok so I don’t have a lot seeing as it’s only a day old idea but this is what I have so far. 

  • Mainly focuses on one of the mums (let’s call her Anneliese for now).
  • There are about 5 friends in the group, one of which is a villain but no one really cares because it is so hard to have friends when you’re out saving the world every day, plus she makes the best chocolate cake so it’s all good.
  • Anneliese married one of her villains, but he's not the take over the world kind of villain more steals expensive shit from the rich and may or may not suffer from Pyromania (still undecided at this point). They were dating before they found out that they were enemies and made an agreement that ‘work’ would never play a role in their other lives.
  • Anneliese received her powers during a meteor shower when she opened one of the meteorites and absorbed a crystal shared that had been hidden inside.
  • Anneliese has a 14 year old son that she adopted who has powers of his own and actually becomes a superhero without telling his parents, which gets very awkward when Anneliese recognizes his voice when they meet.
  • The girls like to go drinking at least once a month, even though some of them technically can’t get drunk because of their powers. ‘But it’s girls night and even if it won’t affect me I can still taste it.’
  • They’re the go with the flow kind of moms when it comes to the other moms at the school, they don’t like to draw attention to themselves (secret identities and all) but they will stand up for other women within a heart beat even if they don’t like them.
  • They all have really flexible jobs too so that they don’t have to keep coming up with excuses as to why they have to leave, most of them working from home.
  • The partners of the moms are so understanding, like ‘So what if it’s date night a supervillain is holding a country hostage, go save the world I’ll pay the bill and get the food to go. See you at home honey.’
  • The group have a ton of codes for when something goes wrong (code 3: can’t make it, no babysitter, code 10: going to miss the PTA meeting supervillain came up, code 17: one of my kids is a HERO AND NEVER TOLD ME I FEEL SO BETRAYED.)

Goku is in an abusive relationship.

I know it is for comedy so i ignore it, but i find it odd that Chichi forbids Goku from training (which makes him the happiest) even though he uses his strength to save the earth so many times.

She threatens him with violence and keeps food from him. Money isnt a problem since Hercule gives him money for giving away credit and gohan is married to Ms grew up in a 19 bedroom house and lives in a town named after her dad Videl. So really it is just his image that she wants to control, which isnt hers to control.

Like goku hates farming and fears his wife most of the time, asking permission to do basically everything. What he does makes him happy and literally saved the world more times tha even the gods have.

I honestly dont think i have heard him raise his voice negatively towards Chichi even once or tell her what to do, but yelling and threats is most of how she communicates with him.

I feel bad for cartoon space ape.

“Spirited Away” sentence meme

Send one to my muse for their reaction

  • “You don’t remember your name?”
  • “Don’t worry, I’ve got four-wheel drive.”
  • “I’ve known you since you were very small.”
  • “Where is your home? Don’t you have any friends or family?”
  • “What did you do with my baby?”
  • “Don’t cling like that, you’ll make me trip.”
  • “You’re such a dope. I was really worried.”
  • “I’m not leaving until you give me a job!”
  • “I just remembered something from a long time ago, I think it may help you.”
  • “Want some gold? I’m not giving it to anybody else!”
  • “Don’t worry, it won’t turn you into a pig.”
  • “I’m sorry I called you a dope before… I take it back!”
  • “You saved me… I knew you were good!”
  • “I finally get a bouquet and it’s a goodbye present. That’s depressing.”
  • “Just one rose isn’t a bouquet.”
  • “Once you’ve met someone, you never really forget them. It just takes a while for your memories to return.”
  • “Scrub it yourself!”
  • “What is it that you want?”
  • “Now keep on your toes, and if you need anything, ask me, okay?”
  • “If you don’t eat some food from this world, you’ll disappear.”
  • “Why don’t you wake everyone up?”
  • “What are all those stones? They look like little houses.”
  • “I was going to save it for my parents, but I think you’d better have it.”
  • “What an esophagus!”
  • “You’re the one everyone’s been looking for!”
  • “I’m see-through!”
  • “You shouldn’t be here. Get out of here, now!”
  • “If you don’t play with me, I’ll cry.”
UPG. Living in Ma’at Guide

Hello everyone, this is the Priest(tess) mentioned in Prince’s Kemetic guide about Set, here to compile my ideas for getting isfet and ma’at in some semblance of proper balance, at least in your immediate area, because it looks like the next couple months at least are going to be a riot.

Disclaimer: I’m neither a scholar nor a formal authority on the topic, and properly worship only one of the gods, which will color my perceptions, but I felt the need to share my thoughts on the matter nonetheless, due to circumstances that have cropped up in a lot of places, including my interactions with people and my own faith.

So, without further ado:

Welcome to Chess’ guide to adopting Ma’at into your daily life.

~!~

Part One: Ma’at is not peace.

Ma’at is usually translated as order, harmony, truth, and balance. That doesn’t mean it’s peace and quiet, though those can be side-effects.

Keep in mind:

  • The goal of Ma’at is to keep the world functioning as it should
  • Ma’at is objective
  • Ma’at counters Isfet, in every place that Isfet occurs

To practice Ma’at is to counter Isfet at its core, by every means you can. Means will be different from person to person, but the next part will cover common ways.

Part Two: Countering Isfet

Commonly perceived as doing things in old ways or rituals, but countering Isfet isn’t so simple as waving a candle and praying.

However, prayer does help a lot; sincere prayer, sans formality, sans pretention, is at its core one of the best ways to foster Ma’at in your life. Through prayer you can learn to speak freely and directly, which won’t always make things nice but if you’re true then you’re doing what needs to be done.

Directly, even, because fostering Ma’at in yourself and for the gods will directly affect their nature. The gods fight Isfet at every turn; to foster Ma’at is to aid the gods themselves, doing your part to keep the world turning.

However, prayer won’t be enough.

Here are other ways you can foster Ma’at through yourself and others.:

  • Bring others to an understanding
  • Bring others to an understanding
  • Draw out the truth of the matter before you
  • Practice emotional maturity and sincerity
  • Practice understanding when you or a situation needs help
  • Be fair and just even when (especially when) it’s inconvenient or someone is noisy about it

You don’t have to do all of them, but if you see the opportunity within your means, take it. Many of these will be difficult and frustrating, but in the end it will ease the pressure off your immediate area.

Everyone has a different way of doing things. More concrete examples would be like mediating or even facilitating an argument to draw out the grievances within and thus result in proper harmony, or advocating for reforms that will benefit those in need.

Part Three: Take care of yourself

I understand that these things can be dangerous to a lot of people. I understand that every one of these things can put your life on the line, in an abusive home or relationship, or a misguided community. Bear in mind: You cannot work Ma’at if you’re already dead, and the above are not absolutes.

Keep in mind:

  • Know when to stop and regroup; if you burn out that day, Ma’at will prosper later if you will yourself to keep a level head and fix the problem from inside.
  • Don’t sell yourself short; you have worth and to believe it will help you.
  • Understand people but separate your self from that of others; one of the fastest ways to burn out is to put yourself in every situation that you see Isfet in.
  • Cleanliness, organization, and proper nutrition all foster Ma’at; if you can’t do it for yourself that day, keep in mind that your gods need you to be in top form, and to do it for them or yourself is the same result.
  • Monitor yourself closely; unnecessary destruction of any kind, including of yourself through abuse or mishandling your capabilities, not only causes you trouble but also fosters Isfet in a lot of sometimes unnoticeable but later significant ways.
  • Don’t forget the little things; not everyone has the means to go out there and fight Isfet in big, flashy ways, and it’s equally important to keep your internal harmony and balance.

This isn’t to say to shy away from pain, but to know that you shouldn’t kill yourself over the work. If it hurts, understand why, and address it as positively as you can, by what means are available and in-line with Ma’at.

If you know it’s necessary, even if you’re afraid of it, voice your thoughts and do what must be done.

Part Four: Ma’at for the gods

The above covers Ma’at among people, and the below will cover Ma’at in your communication and interactions with your gods, whether scholarly or mystical.

Some of these were covered in the above, but here they are doubly emphasized:

  • Speak truly, clearly, and respectfully
  • Offer from the heart
  • Feel sincerely, but don’t let yourself be overwhelmed
  • Know when to draw the line, for yourself and for them
  • Let yourself believe you have influence, whether it sounds crazy or not
  • Be willing to listen and discern the truth from anything, direct or indirect
  • Be willing to consider both the negatives and positives of the gods, and reconcile them
  • Respect that some people will have unusual beliefs and interactions with their faith, differing from yours
  • FOR MYSTICAL KEMETICS: Be empathetic, but know your limits; be careful with what they ask of you, and whether or not it will be good for both of you, and whether or not you yourself are influencing what you might hear; understand that some people don’t believe the way you believe and that’s fine, the gods have accounted for such.
  • FOR SCHOLARLY KEMETICS: Respect that some kemetics believe in the gods in a more direct fashion, that others will have differing interpretations of the gods and their stories, and that the truth of Ma’at is in the core of the stories and not the details, timeless and universal.

Part 5: Devotional activities

A word of notice first of all: This is a difficult faith to practice openly, but it’s one that shouldn’t be hidden away. If you can’t practice openly, this might not be the faith for you, at least at the current time.

That said, if you can devote only a small amount of time to the gods, do so as regularly as you can. Any activity can be a devotional if you offer it up to the gods you want to give it to, though some of them may have preferences.

Miscellaneous acts you can offer the gods:

  • Making a playlist
  • Cooking
  • Cleaning the house
  • Eating, as if you were sharing a meal off the same plate (pray over the food, say you’re offering it, ask them to share with you in the moment, that kind of thing)
  • Art or writing of any kind
  • Magic and rituals, if that’s your thing
  • Taking care of pets
  • Taking care of people
  • Talking to them (basically prayer, though with the express purpose of just talking; tell them about your day)
  • Exercise (yoga, aerobics, tai-chi, zumba; if you feel the burn you can offer it)
  • Playing music or singing
  • Playing games, whether videogames, puzzles, visual novels, or physical activities
  • Going places (museums and parks are a good choice, movies are also good)
  • Defending the truth
  • Calling for justice
  • Advocating for the proper treatment of those in need

Basically any projects or activities that take time and make you meditate on the gods or the activity in question, especially if you do it by yourself or can get a group moving in harmony.

You can also offer:

  • Things you find (cool pebbles, flowers, a nice purchase)
  • Things you own (jewelry, books, old things you’ve made)
  • Things you experience (a memory, a story, your feelings)
  • Significant moments in your life (celebrations, upheavals, opportunities)
  • With the above, remember: Offering doesn’t mean something is given up, but that it’s shared.

(Quick tip: I offer food off my plate because I can’t always make a shrine, and I do it by murmuring over it, “[god’s form of address], I offer you this [food, named as if you’re describing it to the judge of a cooking show], please enjoy this offering with me/eat together with me.” Modify as you please, but the basic idea is there.

This is specifically a devotional act if you eat slowly, enjoy the food, and have dinner conversation, so you might want to either save it for special meals or do it a lot and very quietly. When you’re done, thank them for sharing with you.)

Closing Remarks:

In the end, this is only a guide. Each of us fight Isfet and devote ourselves differently, personally, and most of all, with Ma’at, which might not always be fun but should always bring about something better than what came before.

Always keep in mind that what you do, what Ma’at is, is to make things better than they were before, as the world should be.

Thank you for reading!

If you have other questions about this guide or just want to talk about this kind of thing, please direct asks or messages to

chess-and-snickers.

anonymous asked:

You said something in a post that implied adult binkies aren't bad for teeth. Is this true? I want a binkies, but I don't wanna hurt my teeth

I mean, keeping anything in your mouth for really long stretches of time is going to damage your teeth. It’s all about moderation. Like, if you do it in moderation, there’s not going to be any damage to your mouth. Realigning a jaw takes a really long time or some heavy physical trauma like a car accident.

Adult binkies are fine to use. The chances of damaging your teeth is very slim. But I’m going to include some tips to help maybe calm your fears.

Binkie Tips:
1) Avoid binkies meant for babies if you can. They do slightly up your chances of damaging your teeth, but as long as you don’t them hours on end daily or sleep with them in, you should be fine. If your jaw gets sore, which it will, take it out.

2) Brush your teeth before using your bink. Something about having binkies in after eating, especially something sugary makes cavities more likely.

3) Don’t drink or eat super sugary foods while using h your bink. I know apple juice is great, but save it for after binkie usage. Cavities are bad.

4) Don’t sleep with your binkie in. Keeping an adult binkie in your mouth for 8 hours straight every day increases your chances of damaging your teeth. Doing it every once in awhile is okay, like, it’s not the end of the world, but don’t make it habit.

5) Don’t keep your binkie in for hours and hours and hours straight. Give your mouth a rest. Eat something. Drink some juice. Get a teether.

mummasim  asked:

List 5 things most people don't know about you and pass this to 5 different people you want to know more about 💛

sorry if anyone has ever sent me the thing asking me to say 5 things i LIKE about myself because i feel so awkward and weird doing that BUT THIS ONE I CAN HANDLE SOOOOO here goes nothin: 

  1. i work part time as a debt collector - srsly there is no one in this world more unsuited to this job than me oh jeez
  2. my whole life revolves around food - i save up my money to eat expensive meals/i keep a journal of all the good meals i’ve had/i enjoy reading food literature, articles and even learning about food related concepts like nutrition, agriculture etc. 
  3. but i don’t eat beef or lamb!! 
  4. i used to be a huge otaku a long time ago and watched anime all the time but not anymore smh - i’m still a huge horror manga fan though
  5. i really like watching alltime conspiracies on youtube!!
It hurts.

Requested by: @lovesdraco

Fandom: Harry Potter

Prompt: You found Draco drunk after you took him in the muggle world over the summer vacation.

Characters: Draco Malfoy, You

Warnings: alcohol, mention of abuse

Comment: I never really thought about scenarios with draco so I tried to write him as good as I possibly can. Also I want to mention that I don’t support alcohol abuse in any way. Stay save, my lil Potterheads. 🌸


It was a rather fresh evening. Rainy enough to took an umbrella with you but not too stormy to keep being inside of your apartement. You took the longer way to a fast food restaurant you like just to be a bit longer on the fresh, rain stained air. Not far away from your place of destination you saw Draco looking into the sky; slightly swaying. After you decided to check if he is okay you saw a bottle of liquid in his hand. Probably alcohol, you thought.

Lights of the signboard from a liquor store got reflected in Dracos eyes. Green and magenta neon tones in a watery coat. There are way too many poetic terms to discribe eyes.

But his were magical for you.

He felt your stare and looked away. Draco was raised to be too proud to show of how sensitive he truly is. Since he can remember it had always bad consequences when he got sentimental.

Both of you set down on the roadside under your umbrella and talked for a while about casual things until Draco got all serious.

“You know, y/n, when you get always punished for regular things you start to think that you’d deserve it. I….” Draco’s voice cracked in the middle of the sentence and he couldn’t hold back the tears.
His cheeks were in a harsh red and veins showed up on his hands. He had a firm grip in his clenched fist to compensate the pain he felt.

Your hand rushed to his. In your thoughts you wanted to give him the power to speak up thru the warmth of you soft fingertips.

Draco continued.
“It hurts, ok. It hurts so much and everyone expects me to act a specific way. At the end of the day I am just a bloody crybaby. I hate it. I hate all this. And I feel disgusted by the way I do what everyone - No, what my father - expects me to do.”

He gripped the flesh on his arms; bruises lay on his pale skin.
“I am not worth shit. And I wish” - he sobbs - “I wish I could always feel as safe as I feel with you on my side.”

“Just because you think you aren’t worth anything doesn’t mean it would change how much I care for you.”

“You may not see me as what I am.”

“Would you act different if you weren’t drunk? Would you’ve told me the same things you did?”

Draco grinned.
“Probably not.”

“Than I see you now as what you are. Honest, brave and hurt. Maybe broken. But it doesn’t mean you are not fixable. The family behind you does not have to determine who you are and where you want to be. You can always be yourself instead of a cheap reflection of your father’s cruelity.”

Draco was speechless for the passion in your words.

You stood up.
“Where do you want to go now?” he asked you.
We go and get you some water. And after that…”
you smiled at him and took his hand with you as you walked.
“…you will vomit and I will put you in the bed. It will help.”

Draco tightend the grip around your hand. Maybe to hold balance or he just wanted to feel you closer.

“Are you even old enough to drink alcohol?” you asked with a raised eyebrow.

“No.” said Draco with a guilty smirk.

(picture source: https://giphy.com/gifs/halt-and-catch-fire-Z1xey7m8M2IKY )