She makes it up to the second floor, to Adena’s apartment,
in a daze. Because the taste and feel of Adena’s lips is still zinging through
her body and Adena’s palm is warm in her hand, guiding them toward the privacy
of her apartment.
Adena shuts the door behind them and the first thing that Kat
registers is all the warm light illuminating her living space and the
soothing smell of what she thinks is a candle or incense. She’s curious, so curious to take everything in, to learn more about Adena from the intimacy of her
living space. But right now, she’s far more curious if it’ll feel just as
electrifying to kiss her again.
They’re standing together in the entryway, charged silence
filling the space between them, when Adena looks into her eyes, opens her mouth
as if to say something. But she doesn’t want to talk right now, even though she
loves talking to Adena.
Talking is the last thing on her mind.
She leans forward, takes a shaky breath and tilts her head
down to look into Adena’s eyes, to make sure this is okay. Adena looks as
captivated as Kat feels, and she reaches up to cup Kat’s face again like she
did outside just moments ago, slowly pulling them into another kiss.
It’s so gentle, almost fragile, and she can feel Adena’s
breath fan across her face when she exhales. She doesn’t know what she’s doing,
not really, other than chasing after what she wants and trying not to
And the one thing she knows with absolutely certainty
right now is that she wants to keep kissing Adena.
There’s nothing quite like being freshly 28, back from a lovely weekend away with your boyfriend of 3.5 years and having to dread the disappointed looks from your nosy, middle-aged coworkers when you don’t come in Monday morning with a ring on your finger, DESPITE THE FACT that you told them it wasn’t happening this weekend OR any time soon.
Literally every time we celebrate a special occasion or go on vacation, I get asked or get a comment from the same three ladies at my work. Sometimes it doesn’t even have to be prompted by anything in particular. Is this just my life for the foreseeable future? These are people I’m very friendly with and chat with almost every day but would never hang out with outside of work - most of them are around my mom’s age. I genuinely care about them (one got me a lovely gift for my birthday) and I guess to a certain extent I don’t really regret telling them about my personal life in conversations over the past few years.
It’s just tiring. I’m confident in my very stable relationship and in the forward motion we’re making. I know our timing is a little slower than a lot of other couples our age, but it’s what’s been right for us and we have a rough timeline of the next couple years that we’re both happy with. But without divulging more than I already have, how do I get my coworkers to stop smugly smiling every time I’m going out of town or asking if I’m getting an “extra special gift” for my birthday? It stresses me out way more than not actually being engaged in the first place.
I knew my family hated me. I found out that they like talking behind my back all the time. They think that I’m “gross”. My sisters are always making fun of me and not in a sibling rivalry kind of way. They just like making me feel small.
Whenever i get angry about the things they do, they just say that I’m crazy. My family has literally done such horrible things to me, but they just get away with it and I’m the only one who has to pay the price.
They’ve restrained me and scratched my arms up. They’ve recorded me having mental breakdowns just to laugh at me. They’ve sexually abused me. They’ve tried suffocating me with pillows. They’d bend my limbs in really painful ways. They’ve just completely disregarded my existence. They’ve pinned me down so they could put makeup on me because “I’d be much prettier with makeup”.
I’m just so tired of this. I’m tired of having nightmares about these things. I just want to know what the hell I did for all this to happen.
prompt: any Dirk angst about Priest and the first time he captured Dirk? Either set when Dirk was a kid or during later in s2 where he inevitably sees Priest again?
I’m all for kid!dirk angst.
and boy did this turn out to be angst.
Svlad’s throat was sore from screaming.
He didn’t know how long they’d been driving, how long he’d been stuffed in the back of this van, but it felt like forever. He started to feel like the van would never stop.
A voice came through the wall between him and the driver’s seat.
“Seriously, kid, shut up! No one but us can hear you and it’s getting real annoying.” Said one of the guys that had dragged Svlad into the van.
He did not stop screaming. He screamed for his mum, he screamed for help, he screamed for God to help him. But nothing happened. The van kept going in a steady pace, taking Svlad further and further away from everything he knew.
The van had stopped for periods of time, took weird turns, gone up weird ramps and Svlad kept waiting for him to be let out.
Eventually, he wasn’t able to scream anymore. No voice would come out when he tried. His throat hurt and his face was swollen from tears.
What did he do to deserve this? It wasn’t his fault he was different from other people? He never asked for it? He tried to be normal, he did. He’d promised to be good, he promised his mum he would be good. He wasn’t given the chance.
Svlad didn’t know how much time had passed, but by the time the van came to its final stop, his stomach hurt from hunger and he felt incredibly tired, like all energy had been drained from him.
The door to the van opened suddenly and the light hurt Svlad’s eyes.
A man with cold eyes and an evil smile stood before Svlad.
“Welcome home, project Icarus.” He said.
“What?” Svlad croaked.
“This is Blackwing. This is where kids like you belong.” The man said and leaned in to the van to grab Svlad by the arm.
“Where’s my mum?” Svlad asked, trying to lean away from the man’s touch but the man was strong. He forced Svlad out of the van.
“You don’t have to think about her anymore. She sure won’t be thinking about you.” The man replied and started dragging Svlad towards a grey building. Svlad tried to take in his surroundings in case he could get away from the man. he felt like a heavy rock was placed on his heart when he realized he wasn’t in England anymore.
“Wh-what?” Svlad asked.
“Your mother told us to take you here. She didn’t want you around. Why would she? This is your home now.” The man said and punched in a bunch of numbers into a machine and the doors to the building opened with a loud ringing noise.
“She’s not your mother. Not anymore. This is your new life.” The man said and gestured around the facility they had entered. There was a lot of grey walls, long hallways and weird, too artificial smells. The hallway was cold. Men in white coats watched through a window as the man dragged Svlad further down the hall.
“W-why?” Svlad asked, fresh tears forming in his eyes. His arm had started to hurt from the way the man was gripping it.
“Because you’re not normal. You cause trouble for normal people. You belong here, where we can keep an eye on you.” The man replied.
“I won’t cause trouble, I promise, I-“
“Yes, yes you will. You’re dangerous, Svlad. It’s not fair for other people. With you here, normal people are safe.” The man interrupted.
Svlad let out a sob. He’d heard that he was different his whole life, but dangerous? Was he really? Was his mum scared of him? Is that why she let those men take him away? Is that why she didn’t love him anymore?
The man stopped in front of a door with a weird symbol on it. It was a big diamond shape with a smaller circle inside it and a horizontal line across it.
“This is your room.” The man said and pushed Svlad in.
The room was dark and cold. It smelled like chemicals. There was a small bed, a cabinet and a table with a single chair. And nothing else.
“You might wanna sleep. Tomorrow’s a big day.” The man said and turned to leave.
“Why? What’s tomorrow?” Svlad asked in a shaky voice.
The man smiled in a way that made Svald’s stomach turn. “Your first experiment.”
“My what?” Svlad whispered.
“You’re different. We want to figure you out.” The man said then his expression turned more threatening than any Svlad had seen before. “And I do suggest you help us to. You don’t want to know what happens if you don’t cooperate.”
Svlad whimpered. He felt hot tears make their way down his face again. He was afraid of many things; the dark, spiders, monsters under the bed… But he had never been afraid of anything as much as he was of this man.
“Please, just let me go, I promise I’ll be good.” Svlad begged.
“I can’t do that, Svlad. You’re a monster. This way people are safe and you can be useful. We can make you useful. This is the only way.” The man replied. “And stop crying. It’s annoying.” He added.
Svlad tried his best to make the tears stop. He held his breath, trying to control the sobs. He was shaking. This couldn’t be happening.
“Why are you doing this? Who are you?” He whispered.
The man smiled again. “You can call me The Priest.” He said and slammed the door shut behind him, leaving Svlad alone in the cold, dark room.
And during the next decade or so, in that cold, dark room little Svlad would disappear and project Icarus would take his place.
if you have ideas for fics, please send me prompts! I would love to write them! my inbox is open! xx
I just went for a funny gif for tonight’s G’NIGHT FUCKOS post but the more I sit here and try to sum up my day, the more I kind of feel like this is a representation of me.
Much of the time I stay quiet in fandom because everything starts to feel like a fight, that we can’t just leave others to their views, that we have to argue over everything. So I just scroll past and reblog some pretty gifs instead. But there are times–especially now that Battlefront II is revving me up for wanting to talk about Star Wars again!–when I just go, “FUCK IT, I’M GONNA DO THIS. I’M GONNA HAVE FUN IN SW FANDOM.”
And I will probably Regret It later at some point, but, eh, well, at least I can make ridiculous gifs of my beautiful darling that make me smile every time I see it. eta: I think a lot of this was from some other stuff leaking over (thoughts on some family history and loss) that I’ve been trying to put into words for awhile and thinking about it hit some personal places, so I was kind of unnerved. But I think I’m back to being even keeled.
I actually kinda feel bad about doing commissions but really we are a little low on some things because something happened with the car and we just got it back and it really was a bit surprising hit with our financials…
well I kinda got in a small argument with my mom because I’ve been doing this so much lately and… well she told me that this isn’t really helping anyone and that drawing is useless… and it really kinda just broke my heart…
I just want to help but it seems like this is the only way i can…