the fault in our stars set

Creating Titles

Anonymous asked: “How do you come up with a title for you story or novel?”

In my experience, titles for stories are something writers often go into a project knowing. I wouldn’t say this is always true, though many great titles from authors I’ve asked simply just popped into their heads - or that’s what they claim anyway. I believe it. It seems like such a minor thing after all, so why would anyone lie?

I also have talked to writers who struggle with titles. For me, it’s hit or miss. Some projects just have a title. Others don’t. I once titled something so terribly that all of my readers asked me to change it, almost unanimously. It wasn’t that bad of a title, but it wasn’t particularly great either. I ended up changing it to something that I didn’t particularly care for, but after awhile now, I know that is a much better title. There are a few ways to come up with titles.

Keep reading

I can’t talk about our love story, so I will talk about math. I am not a mathematician, but I know this: There are infinite numbers between 0 and 1. There’s .1 and .12 and .112 and an infinite collection of others. Of course, there is a bigger infinite set of numbers between 0 and 2, or between 0 and a million. Some infinities are bigger than other infinities. A writer we used to like taught us that. There are days, many of them, when I resent the size of my unbounded set…But my love, I cannot tell you how thankful I am for our little infinity. I wouldn’t trade it for the world. You gave me a forever within the numbered days, and I’m grateful.
—  John Green, The Fault in Our Stars

Marvel/Fox have announced their upcoming movies’ release dates for 2018! Deadpool 2 is set to release June 1. 2018. New Mutants, an X-Men spinoff movie hits theaters April 2nd, 2018.And “Dark Phoenix”, another X-Men spinoff about Jean Grey, has a release date of November 2nd, 2018.

Here’s what we know about each of them:

DEADPOOL 2

  • Release: June 1, 2018
  • Directed by David Leitch
  • Josh Brolin cast as Cable
  • Zadie Beetz cast as Domino
  • Colossus, Negasonic Teenage Warhead, and Dopinder as returning
  • Filming will begin on June 19 until September 18. 

NEW MUTANTS💥

  • X-Men spinoff
  • Directed by Josh Boone (The Fault in Our Stars)
  • Based on the early ‘80s comics
  • Likely going to involve the character Blink, Warpath, and Sunspot (We’ve seen them all briefly in Days of Future Past)
  • Also going to include Danielle Moonstar, Wolfsbane, Cannonball, Magik, and Warlock
  • James McAvoy IS returning as Professor X
  • Maisie Williams has been rumored for a role in this film
  • Release: April 2018 (tentative)
  • No casting yet

DARK PHOENIX🔥

  • X-Men spinoff movie about Jean Grey
  • Unknown if Sophie Turner will reprise her role as young Jean or if they will make it about an older version of the character
  • Very possible that James McAvoy stars as Professor X
  • Release: November 2nd, 2018.
Some infinities are bigger than other infinities. A writer we used to like taught us that. There are days, many of them, when I resent the size of my unbounded set. I want more numbers than I’m likely to get, and God, I want more numbers for Augustus Waters than he got. But, Gus, my love, I cannot tell you how thankful I am for our little infinity. I wouldn’t trade it for the world. You gave me a forever within the numbered days, and I’m grateful.
—  John Green | The Fault in Our Stars

anonymous asked:

So I'm thinkin 3, 4, 40, 49 with bi!Tj 😘

3. “Don’t you know how happy you make me?” 4. “I want you to look at me the way you look at him.” 40. “We were meant for each other.” 49. “It’s been how long since you’ve had sex?”



It was always strange, how close you were with your best friend… every guy you dated seemed to think so, too. Tj was nearly always attached to your hip, and always overly affectionate. You knew that he considered himself to be bisexual, but also knew that he preferred men to women.. that’s why you never mentioned your feelings to him. Why you never told him how much you really loved him.


It should have been obvious, though.. with the way you always ran to him to pick up the pieces of your broken heart.


You heard Tj enter your apartment before you saw him. You were currently curled up on your couch in a blanket cocoon, sniffling every few moments while you watched The Fault In Our Stars. You heard the sound of him setting his keys and a bag down on the counter before he came over to the couch, crawling over and settling in behind you. “Hey, babe..” He whispered, wrapping an arm around your waist and pulling you against his chest.


Just that one little act of affection had tears overflowing from your eyes again, as you turned and buried your face in his neck. “Shhh.. I’ve got you.. it’s okay, I’m here.” He cooed, rubbing his hand up and down your back slowly. “You wanna talk about it..?” He asked after a few moments, once your sobs had become more quiet.


“He cheated on me.. Josh fucking cheated on me.” You whimpered, feeling his body tense at your words. “I-I should’ve known something was up.. we haven’t had sex in six months.. I.. I guess I’m just too naive..” You continued, gripping onto TJ’s shirt tightly. “Wait..” he said after a few quiet seconds. “It’s been how long since you’ve had sex?” He asked, pulling back from you so he could look at your face.


You shrugged pathetically, chewing the inside of your cheek. “I guess I’m just a really bad girlfriend, Teej.. I.. I can’t make anyone happy.” You told him, your lip trembling afterwards. He let out a slow sigh, cradling your cheek in his hand as he peppered kisses to your forehead. “Don’t you know how happy you make me?” He whispered, his breath fanning over your face and calming you down, considerably. “That’s different, Teej.. you’re different.” You told him, but he simply shook his head.


“You really think so..? You think that what we have.. what we feel.. is so different from what you had with Josh? Or Rich?” He wondered, tucking your hair behind your ear. Your heart fluttered as you considered what he meant by that. Was he admitting to having real feelings for you?


“Teej, I.. I don’t understand.” You breathed, meeting his eyes nervously. He smiled shyly, wetting his lips before he spoke again. “I want you to look at me the way you look at him.


You were taken back by his confession, searching his face for any sign that he might be joking. When you didn’t respond right away, he continued. “Babe.. we’ve been playing this game for far too long.. Always being with people who end up treating us like shit.. and then you know where we end up..?” He paused, pressing a chaste kiss to your temple. “Right here, in each other’s arms..”


He stopped talking again, letting out another sigh as he held you tighter to him. “Ive been thinking a lot, lately, and.. maybe we were meant for each other.” He said softly, biting into his lip nervously as he waited for your response.


“I..” You opened your mouth to speak, but couldn’t get more than a word out. He smiled at your shocked silence, moving his hand so that he could run his thumb across your lower lip slowly. “I’m gonna kiss you, now.” He whispered breathlessly, not even waiting for another response before his lips met yours in a featherlight embrace.


Originally posted by softtroublemaker

Originally posted by painfulblisss

lotteverbeek:  Off takings again! Berlin ich komme jetzt d'ran! 🛫 🇩🇪

Books Everyone Should Read!

I’ve wanted to do this for ages, so here goes. These are some of the books/plays/poets that I think (this is just my opinion!) everyone should read before they die. If anyone wants to add to the list, then please do by commenting or reblogging!

Originally posted by blackewhitelover


Fantasy and/or Children’s Novels: 

  • The Harry Potter Series - J. K. Rowling. Anyone who knows me, knows that I will always love Potter, until the very end. 
  • The Lord of the Rings & The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien.
  • The Chronicles of Narnia - C. S. Lewis.
  • The Percy Jackson Series - Rick Riordan. All of his books are great, not just this series, but the others too.
  • Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland & Through The Looking Glass - Lewis Carroll.
  • The Wonderful Wizard of Oz (The Oz Books) - L. Frank Baum.
  • The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare.
  • A Series of Unfortunate Events - Lemony Snicket.
  • The Secret Garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett.
  • The Once & Future King - T. H. White. 

Dystopian and/or Utopian Novels: 

  • The Hunger Games - Suzanne Collins.
  • The Maze Runner Trilogy - James Dashner. 
  • The Divergent Trilogy - Veronica Roth.

  • The Giver Quartet - Lois Lowry.
  • Lord of the Flies -  William Golding.

  • The Handmaid’s Tale -  Margaret Atwood.
  • The Road - Cormac McCarthy.

Gothic and/or Horror Novels:

  • Dracula - Bram Stoker.
  • The Beetle: A Mystery - Richard Marsh.
  • The Bloody Chamber - Angela Carter.
  • Frankenstein - Mary Shelley.
  • The Fall of the House of Usher & Other Writings - Edgar Allen Poe.
  • Interview with a Vampire - Anne Rice.
  • The Darren Shan Series - Darren Shan. 
  • Salem’s Lot - Stephen King.
  • Dreamcatcher - Stephen King.
  • The Shining - Stephen King.
  • Carrie - Stephen King. 

Young Adult and/or Influential Novels:

  • To Kill A Mockingbird - Harper Lee (I have Go Set A Watchman but I still need to read it!). 
  •  Oranges Aren’t The Only Fruit -  Jeanette Winterson.
  • The Catcher in the Rye - J. D. Salinger. 
  • The Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini. 
  • The Virgin Suicides - Jeffery Eugenides. 
  • The Perks of Being a Wallflower - Stephen Chbosky. 
  • All The Bright Places - Jennifer Niven. 
  • Attachments - Rainbow Rowell. 
  • Eleanor & Park - Rainbow Rowell.
  • Fangirl - Rainbow Rowell. 
  • Landline - Rainbow Rowell.
  • Carry On - Rainbow Rowell.
  • Looking For Alaska - John Green.
  • An Abundance of Katherines - John Green.
  • Paper Towns - John Green.
  • Will Grayson, Will Grayson - John Green & David Levithan. 
  • The Fault in Our Stars - John Green.
  • Me and Earl and the Dying Girl - Jesse Andrews. 

Crime and/or Thriller Novels: 

  • The Alex Rider Series - Anthony Horowitz.
  • The Cuckoo’s Calling -  Robert Galbraith (J. K. Rowling). 
  • The Silkworm -  Robert Galbraith (J. K. Rowling).
  • Career of Evil -  Robert Galbraith (J. K. Rowling).

Classics:

  • The Great Gatsby - F. Scott Fitzgerald.
  • The Picture of Dorian Gray - Oscar Wilde.
  • Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen.
  • Sense and Sensibility - Jane Austen.
  • Mansfield Park - Jane Austen.
  • Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte.
  • Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte.
  • Of Mice and Men - John Steinbeck.
  • Great Expectations - Charles Dickens.
  • The Grapes of Wrath - John Steinbeck.
  • Moby-Dick; or, The Whale - Herman Melville.
  • Oliver Twist - Charles Dickens.
  • The Beach -  Alex Garland.

Plays (read them and if you can see a performance or two, there’s nothing like the theatre):

  • The Oresteia -  Aeschylus.
  • The Three Theban Plays - Sophocles.
  • The Odyssey - Homer. 
  • The Iliad - Homer. 
  • William Shakespeare’s Plays (these are just a few of my favourites!): 

Titus Andronicus.

Measure for Measure. 

Macbeth.

Hamlet.

A Midsummer Night’s Dream.

The Merchant of Venice.

As You Like It.

Twelfth Night.

  • The Duchess of Malfi - John Webster. 

Poetry:

  • William Blake’s Poetry - Literally one of my favourite poets. 
  • William Wordsworth’s Poetry.
  • War Poetry -  two of my favourites are Wilfred Owen and Siegfried Sassoon.
  • Sylvia Plath’s Poetry - C’mon, who hasn’t read her work?
  • Carol Ann Duffy - I love her. 

I think that’s all I have for now. I know I’m missing loads, but this is what I’ve been able to come up with so far. Also, just because she asked this is for the lovely @glide-thru, I read a lot :P

There are infinite numbers between 0 and 1. There’s .1 and .12 and .112 and an infinite collection of others. Of course, there is a bigger infinite set of numbers between 0 and 2, or between 0 and a million. Some infinities are bigger than other infinities. A writer we used to like taught us that. There are days, many of them, when I resent the size of my unbounded set. I want more numbers than I’m likely to get, and God, I want more numbers for Augustus Waters than he got. But, Gus, my love, I cannot tell you how thankful I am for our little infinity. I wouldn’t trade it for the world. You gave me a forever within the numbered days, and I’m grateful.
—  John Green, The Fault in Our Stars

Anonymous asked:

So, I’ve written a lot of fanfiction. Now I’m trying to think about original stuff. I know I’m capable. Lots of my fic contains OCs/ideas. The problem is that I feel like (truth or not) the thing I do best is romance, all aspects of that - the tension before and the honeymoon phase and the partnership after. The setting can certainly add some extra flavoring, but what if I’m really just good at writing romance? Should I write original romance fiction? I don’t even read that genre.


Okay, first of all…

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with writing romance. Romance novels make up a significant portion of the book industry. :)

Also, when you say that you don’t read the romance genre, what kinds of books are you thinking about? Because romance novels are a lot more than stories about ladies who get kidnapped by sexy pirates with names like Captain Blaze Longheart, who have abs so tight you can bounce a quarter off of them. The Fault in Our Stars? Sorry, but it’s romance. The Hunger Games? Romance in a dystopian setting. The Remnant Chronicles? Romance in a far-future fantasy dystopia. The Raven Cycle? Romantic urban fantasy. All the Bright Places? Contemporary romance.

Love is a fundamental part of being human–even people who are wired in a way that they don’t experience love or certain types of love, they are loved, so love is still a part of their world. There are so many different kinds of love, romantic and otherwise, and exploring that can be an intensely satisfying and fun endeavor. And, by no stretch of the imagination does that mean you have to write stories that are only about two people falling in love. You can set a love story anywhere in any situation. Two polar opposites end up stuck together on an uninhabited island for six months? There might be a love story there–romantic or otherwise. Princess discovers she’s the “chosen one” and has to overthrow the usurper of her father’s throne with the aid of a former spy turned prisoner? Might be a love story there. Guy volunteers to assist his disabled neighbor at school while trying to deal with the death of a parent? Might be a love story there, too. Open your mind and you’ll find there are lots of amazing love stories out there waiting to be told. Go forth and tell them WITH PRIDE! :)

———————————————————————
Have a writing question? I’d love to hear from you! Please be sure to read my ask rules and master list first or your question will not be answered. :)

Trying (Damian Wayne Imagine)

Requested: Yes
Request: Can you do one with older Damian Wayne where the reader an Damian are trying to get pregnant but they are having trouble. The reader thinks it’s all her fault but Damian comforts her and FLUFFF. then at they end they she finally gets pregnant.
Summary: After a long time of trying to get pregnant, you break from the thought of being unable to provide Damian a long desired family.
Word count: 968
Warning(s): Talk of sex; Sadness

Very early in my and Damians relationship we both knew we wanted a family. Damian knew though that with the work he does at night it might be very dangerous for not only him but also for his family.

But when Damian and I finally got married, we were beyond sure that we could make it work. Of course we let ourselves live the newlywed life for a while, just enjoying our time together. But two years after tying the knot, we knew we were ready, we were both yearning for a family.

We threw birth control out the door and started trying. We both knew it might take a while, my contraceptives needed to wear off, and my body needed to get used to the possibility of pregnancy.

After a half a year of trying, we were still hopeful, but sadly every pregnancy test turned out negative. Damian didn’t let it bother him what so ever, he just thought that we hadn’t gotten lucky yet. 

But for me, it was eating me up inside. How come teenagers often get pregnant even using contraceptives but I’m not able to get pregnant when we’re trying.

 Another half a year later, and we’re still coming up negative, even Damian was beginning to get a bit worried, but not nearly as worried as I was. I felt like it was all my fault, yet I was still trying to keep up a strong front, not letting my husband know how much it pained me inside.

On some days I felt like Dami would be so much better off with out me, some days I thought that maybe I was just never made to be a mother, on other days I thought that maybe a choice I had made prior in life has come back to haunt me. Every negative test hit me a bit harder, every time Damian would sympathetically hug me saying that we just needed to keep trying I would break a little more. I was slowly shattering.

Damian was away, dealing with work at Wayne enterprise, which meant I had time alone to reflect on life. I did yet another test.

“Of course it would be negative.” I mumble to myself, throwing the stick away. 

With my head in my hands I sit on the living room couch. The piercing silence giving me my final push.

“This is all my fault.” I slamm my fist violently in to the sides of the couch, tears streaming down my face.

“I’m just faulty, I can’t give him the family he wants.” I scream, slamming my hands down again, hiding my face in my knees in my shame. In all my heartbreak and rage I couldn’t hear Damian come in. He was in the doorway, looking at the scene unfold, his heart breaking, knowing that his beloved wife felt like she was to blame, and blaming himself for never noticing how this ordeal was affecting her.

He quietly came and sat down on the couch next to me, rubbing comforting circles on my back with his large warm hand, waiting for my breathing to calm back down, sobs shaking my whole body.

“Beloved…” He starts slowly, unsure of how to approach this new situation, it has taken him completely off guard. 

“This is not in any way your fault.” He tries to calm my mind, but causes me to snap up and look at him.

“This is nothing but my fault.” I sob, burying my face in his shoulder, as he pulled my body in to a tight embrace.

This is in no way your fault, Beloved, it’s just a bad set of circumstance. And even if we can never have children, I will love you no matter what. To the moon and back, Beloved. I would bring you the stars if you wanted me to. I love you more than my life.” He says, placing a gentle kiss on my head, my sobs slowly becoming weaker.

“We can always adopt, if we can’t have our own.” He says, now knowing the full extent of the damage this has caused my mental health.

I eventually fall asleep on him, he vows to himself to do everything in his power to make this better for me. He carries me to our bed, holding me close to him for the rest of the night, skipping patrol even.

The rest of the week was spent fixing what was broken, Damian never left my side, always asked me how I was doing, reading the small changes in my demeanor like an open book. I started feeling sick, but i attributed that to the stress I’ve been under.

But after two days my curiosity got the best of me. I snuck off to the bathroom, leaving Damian to read his book. I took yet another test, sitting on the floor praying that it would come up positive. 

After being in the bathroom, for what to Damian felt too long he came to the door and knocked. “Beloved, Is everything alright?” He questions, concern lacing his voice.

Yeah, everything’s okay.” I answer, absentmindedly grabbing the test, looking down at it. My eyes go wide as i look at the two red stripes, a loud scream escaping my mouth.

Damian begins to bang on the door, “Beloved, what happened?” He frantically asks. I pull open the door, hugging Dami for dear life. “Look” I say giving him the stick. It takes him a moment to process, but before I know it, his spinning me in his arms through the apartment, laughing, tears on his cheeks.

“I can’t believe it.” He exclaims, finally coming to a stop and hugging me close.

The rest of the pregnancy there wasn’t even a chance of him letting me out of his sight.


Masterlist
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With love,
-K

Jamie/Tyler Fic Recs

My favorite bennguin fics. Extra sappy with a side of smut. 

Door to Door by  Ferritin4 | 10.1K

“It’s three in the morning,” Jamie says. On cue, a dog pokes its head around the corner to the entryway and bounces over to the — to this guy. It’s followed by another, browner dog, and Jamie has a moment of surrealist sleep-deprived horror where he imagines an infinite string of dogs forever bounding gleefully towards —

“I work two jobs. I’m Tyler,” Tyler says, extending his hand. “Do you want to come in?”

Well, he’s not doing anything illegal, Jamie thinks, shaking it, because no criminal in the history of crime has ever willingly invited a cop into their house, and there is no one in the city of Dallas who hasn’t pegged Jamie as a cop within six seconds of meeting him.

dumb love thing by  cornfields | 16.5K

Jamie would explain that he couldn’t call Tyler anymore because the dumb love thing is getting worse, and that Tyler deserves buddies that are normal and cool and didn’t spend a good ten years unable to string sentences together. Tyler already has a million buddies that are super fucking chill and rad and whatever else Tyler likes to say when he’s drunk and shirtless. “Don’t stop calling,” Tyler insists. “I hate it when people stop calling.”

texas heat by  Rest | 9.7K

He can’t pretend getting traded didn’t gut him. He gave that city his all, and some part of him really thought it was going to be a for-life thing. But he can see, now, that Boston wasn’t actually that good for him. Dallas is giving him a chance to be better.

He doesn’t think being better includes creeping on his dog walker, but whatever. Nobody’s perfect.

something good and right and real by  blamefincham, thistidalwave | 15.4K

Jamie stares at him for a long moment, blinking slowly. “You…what?”

“Told her I’d bring you to the wedding and tell everyone the story of how we realized we’re in love?” Tyler repeats. “It’s in Florida. This weekend. Uh, I hope you don’t have plans?”

“But we’re not…in love,” Jamie says, like he’s checking to make sure it’s still true.

“No, we’d have to pretend,” Tyler says.

Already Winning by  lightgetsin | 14.4K

Which was how Jamie found himself on the living room floor of Tyler’s unfurnished house in the middle of the best third date of his life, arguing over sex toy assembly.

personal relations by  bluejayys | 13.1K

“Okay everyone,” Tyler says, grinning wildly. “Welcome to my very special social media seminar: How Not to Be a Dick on the Internet.” He pauses, and then honest to God winks at Jamie. “Some of you might want to take notes.”

In which Tyler is the new Stars PR guy and Jamie doesn’t like to bunch mox. He does, as it turns out, like to duck sick, though.

say geronimo by  Menacherie | 4.6K

Jamie learns how to cook and gets love advice from soccer moms.

Wear Your Apron High by  lupinus, reallyyeahokay, uraneia | 7.9K

Tyler gets knocked up and then his good-for-nothing cheating husband gets his fool self killed. Luckily his friend Jordie has a farm and the need for an extra set of hands. He also has a really cute brother. Too bad Jamie doesn’t seem to like Tyler much.

Non-Optional Tickets to the Trainwreck by  ice_hot_13 | 16.3K

College!AU; Tyler makes a horrible first impression on Jamie when he transfers to Dallas, and that’s really just the latest disaster in Tyler’s life.

So Let’s Raise the Bar (And Our Cups to the Stars) by  Brioux | 15.1K

It’s all Jordie’s and Jason’s fault. At least, that’s what Jamie will say later. 

“There are infinite numbers between 0 and 1. There’s .1 and .12 and .112 and an infinite collection of others. Of course, there is a bigger infinite set of numbers between 0 and 2, or between 0 and a million. Some infinities are bigger than other infinities. A writer we used to like taught us that. There are days, many of them, when I resent the size of my unbounded set. I want more numbers than I’m likely to get, and God, I want more numbers for Augustus Waters than he got. But, Gus, my love, I cannot tell you how thankful I am for our little infinity. I wouldn’t trade it for the world. You gave me a forever within the numbered days, and I’m grateful.”  

- The Fault In Our Stars, John Green

“There are infinite numbers between 0 and 1. There’s .1 and .12 and .112 and an infinite collection of others. Of course, there is a bigger infinite set of numbers between 0 and 2, or between 0 and a million. Some infinities are bigger than other infinities. A writer we used to like taught us that. There are days, many of them, when I resent the size of my unbounded set. I want more numbers than I’m likely to get, and God, I want more numbers for Augustus Waters than he got. But, Gus, my love, I cannot tell you how thankful I am for our little infinity. I wouldn’t trade it for the world. You gave me a forever within the numbered days, and I’m grateful.” 

hendrikheutmann: Guess which “Hackfresse” had his last day of shooting “Counterpart” and won’t fly back to L.A. … #greatful @lotteverbeek @nolanfunk@juneszahdi #Counterpart #berlin#itsawrap #greatday#myenglishisgettingbetter#lovethenetherlands #lifeofanactress 😊😂😅

anonymous asked:

hey in a cradle of flesh and bone it has a tag for terminal illness does that mean one of the voltron characters dies? i just wanted to know before i read it because I try and avoid those fics they really set me off

yeah.. someone dies :/ but for once it ain’t lance (shocker!!). and i tend to avoid those fics too, but unfortunately i failed to see the ‘character death’ tag and so i ended up being EXTRA upset over it   

Just Friends (L.H.)

Masterlist || Ask

Part 2 // Part 3

*****

What have you done to deserve this?
You’re a good person, never lied - except when necessary - but you never thought you deserved to experience this kind of pain.
You sat quietly on the couch in the dressing room as you watched the two of them be all loved up.
It wasn’t even an emotional pain anymore. It had now become physical.
You could practically feel your heart clench every time they whispered something to each other with loved up smiles on their faces or when she made him laugh or when they exchanged any sign of affection towards each other.
It. Just. Hurt.
Normally you would leave the room unnoticed whenever it was just them two, but you didn’t have anywhere else to go right now; so you stayed where you were in silence and in pain.
The other three boys came in boisterously, snapping the two of them out of their bubble, as the three of you all turned to look at them.
Calum’s eyes caught yours and his smile turned to a sympathetic one, knowing the exact reason behind the sadness of your eyes.
He strolled over to you and plopped down on the couch beside you. “Hey,” he rubbed your knee comfortingly.
You gave him a weak smile. “Hey,” you whispered, afraid that if you spoke any louder he would hear your voice crack from holding back all your tears.
He quickly glanced at the two before turning back to you. “Why do you torture yourself?”
You didn’t respond. You knew what he meant, but you didn’t have an answer.
“Babe, you need to tell him,” Calum uttered.
You looked over at the two of them that had now been joined by Ashton and Michael. All of them laughing and conversing with one another.
“He’s happy with her,” was all you said to Calum.
He raised an eyebrow at you. “Do you truly believe that?”
You gave him an exasperated look. “You and I have both seen how he is around her. His whole demeanor changes. His smile is wider, his eyes lighter, his mood happier. What else is there to say?”
Calum shook his head. “I don’t believe he could be as happy as he would be if he was with you.”
“If you think telling him would change anything, you’re wrong. I see the way he looks at her. He doesn’t and won’t ever look at me like that. He’s been oblivious to the fact that I’ve been in love with him for the past year, Cal.” You took a deep breath and looked back over at them. “I just want him happy. That’s all you could ever ask for someone you love. It may not be with me, but at least he’s happy. I’d rather suffer and see him happy than him not happy at all.”
“Do you ever think that maybe if you told him how you felt you’d be able to see that he felt the same way?”
“And how would you know he ever felt the same way about me that I do about him?”
He gave you a dumb look. “I’m one of his best mate, Y/N. I would obviously know.”
“He’s in a relationship he’s content with. Why would I say something that would affect it?”
Calum sighed. “Have you ever thought that if he told you his feelings towards you that you could get a sense of closure that could help you move on if you’re so set on the idea that he never even had feelings for you.”
You looked back over at the two. “Maybe.”
“So why don’t you?”
You shrugged. “Just scared of the answer, I guess.”
Calum nodded with a sigh and turned to look at them with you. Just then, Luke looked over at the two of you and his eyebrows furrowed, almost as if he was unhappy.
You shook your head to snap yourself out of where your thoughts were headed. You’re just thinking crazy now.


You were now sat alone at the back of the tour bus which Michael had deemed as a “prison.” You were just in a pair of sweats, a long sleeved shirt, and fuzzy socks with a blanket draped over your legs as your laptop rested on top, watching Netflix.
The rest of the boys and her had gone out to a club nearby for a few drinks since they had a day off the following day. You didn’t want to go as you didn’t want to see them grind up on each other all night. No, thank you.
The bus was completely empty and for once, you were happy that you were able to be left completely alone at the same time you didn’t want to be left alone with your thoughts. Your thoughts could take some serious negative turns when your mind wandered.
Calum had begged you to go out with them, saying that he would keep you away from the two, but you were persistent on not going. He finally stopped after making you promise to call him if you really needed him. At times like these you were thankful to have a best friend like Calum.
You heard something bang against something towards the front of the bus which made you furrow your eyebrows in confusion. As far you knew, you were completely alone since none of the others had texted you that they were headed back and security was outside to prevent anyone from just coming in.
You placed your laptop on the space beside you and threw the blanket off your legs. You slipped on your boots, grabbed your phone and pulled up Calum’s number just in case. You slowly crept your way out of the back room and to where the bunks were.
It was pitch black inside the bus apart from the little lights on the floor.
There was another bang and you clutched your phone tighter. Your hand blindly felt along the wall for the light switch. You found it and turned it on.
You screamed. “Holy mother of shit!” You clutched your chest as your heart beat rapidly.
Luke mirrored your reaction as well. “What the hell, Y/N!”
You shoved him. “What the hell? You bloody gave me a heart attack, Luke!” You yelled as you tried to calm your breathing. “What are you even doing back here anyways? You’re supposed to be at the club.”
“The boys wanted me to check up on you,” he panted, still recovering from the scare.
You rolled your eyes and turned to walk back into the back room. “Well, I’m fine. You can go on back now and tell them to stop worrying about me.” You sat back down on the couch and got back into your previous position.
Luke followed you though and sat beside you where your laptop had been previously placed. He looked at your screen. “The Fault In Our Stars?”
You didn’t look at him as you un-paused the movie. “Yup.”
“Why are you watching this?”
“I’m a girl. I’m in a sad romantic mood. Why not John Green?” You gave him a blunt explanation. You didn’t mean to be so rude and blunt, but you honestly thought you’d be alone for at least a couple more hours.
Luke nudged you. “Don’t be mean.”
“Sorry,” you muttered not sounding apologetic at all.
Luke grabbed your laptop and set it aside. “What’s your problem, Y/N?”
You refused to look at him as you tried to grab your laptop back, but he just pushed it further away. “Nothing. Give me back my laptop, Luke.”
He turned to face you fully. “No, tell me what’s your deal, Y/N. You don’t smile anymore. You hardly ever laugh. You don’t even talk to me anymore. You just sulk around. Why?”
You didn’t need this right now.
You stood up and started walking towards the bunks. You heard Luke get up and follow you.
“Don’t ignore me, Y/N! What is your problem?! Talk to me!” He shouted.
You spun on your heal and glared at him through your unshed tears. “You want to know what my problem is?! You want to know why I haven’t smiled or laughed recently? Why I haven’t spoken to you in who knows how long? You really want to know why I’ve been depressed for the past six months?!” You screamed at him, finally breaking.
Luke didn’t say anything. He just continued to stare at you in shock as you exploded.
“It’s because I’ve been in love with you for the past year and I have to watch you be happy and be in love with someone else. I have to sit back and watch on in pain knowing that the guy I’m in love with will never feel the same and it fucking hurts, okay? I don’t smile or laugh because it hurts. I don’t speak to you because I’m trying to get over this dumb feeling I have towards you.” Your voice cracked on the last word, showing him just how much pain you’ve been in. You took in a shaky breath as you wiped away your tears and let out pity laugh. “But maybe Calum was right. I should have told you how I felt - even if you don’t feel the same - and got the closure that I needed to move on.”
Luke still didn’t say anything. His mouth opened and closed as he tried to find something to say.
“What? Got nothing to say?” You sarcastically say to him.
He shook his head. “Y/N…”
You crossed your arms. “Just say it already, Luke. Tell me that you don’t have feelings for me.”
He looked pained. “Why didn’t you tell me? I’m in a relationship and you just-” You cut him off. “Admitting feelings is hard for anyone, Luke. You’re the one that told me to tell you why I sulk around so much, well, you have your answer now.”
“I just don’t feel that way towards you anymore,” Luke brought up.
You paused. “What do you mean ‘anymore’?”
“I loved you once too, you know, but then she came along and made me forget about it, about my feelings for you. It’s too late,” Luke confessed.
“It could have gone either way, Luke. I could have told you how I felt, but you could have told me too. Sorry, that I’m late. I know that she makes you happy and I can see that, which is why I didn’t say anything.”
You’d never seen such a look of pain and conflict cross his eyes. “Y/N…”
The door to the bus opened and in walked the rest of the gang and her. They all stopped when they saw the two of you standing in the middle, Luke with a pained expression on his face while yours had tears running down it.
Calum knew what had happened with just one look. He gave you a sympathetic expression.
You shook your head. “I don’t need this,” you muttered under your breath and stalked off the bus ignoring all the calls for you to come back and leaving behind the mess that was your love life.


___________________________________________

10

“There are infinite numbers between 0 and 1. There’s .1 and .12 and .112 and an infinite collection of others. Of course, there is a bigger infinite set of numbers between 0 and 2, or between 0 and a million. Some infinities are bigger than other infinities. A writer we used to like taught us that. There are days, many of them, when I resent the size of my unbounded set. I want more numbers than I’m likely to get, and God, I want more numbers for Augustus Waters than he got. But, Gus, my love, I cannot tell you how thankful I am for our little infinity. I wouldn’t trade it for the world. You gave me a forever within the numbered days, and I’m grateful.”