the fainting goats

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I don’t know why fainting goats exist…

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Oooh my God!

halliescomut  asked:

I love all of your pet pics that you share. They always make me smile. I am curious as to how your dogs and cat get along? Does your cat just ignore the dogs, or do the cuddle sometimes. I'm just curious. Thanks for being awesome and using your voice for good! P.S. Your new short story is wonderful, I can't wait for more writing from you, but no pressure.

Seamus and Watson have been best friends since the day Watson came into our house 7 years ago. Watson and Marlowe have had a more difficult relationship, mostly because she thinks he likes to be chased. (He does not).

But about a year ago, Watson stopped running away when she chased him, and instead did a combination of the fainting goat and OH NO BITCH MEET MY CLAWS routine. Somehow, Marlowe got the message, and now they sleep together in front of the fireplace when it’s cold out.

Our cat, Luna, got so fed up with Marlowe, though, that she literally moved out of our house and now lives with a nice couple a few houses up the block. We miss her, but we see her when we take walks, and she’s so much happier with them, so it’s all okay.

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Going from “I want to draw them in school uniforms” to “why did my brain think this was a good idea”.

I blame @ocean-kun for this–look at what you made me do I couldn’t stop thinking about Frisk in seifuku–

Okay now I can go crash :D

EDIT: Also here’s the sketch because for some reason I really like it haha–

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Lucie and Za: From Fear to Freedom and Family

Many people think of pygmy goats as a pet breed, but like their larger cousins, they are often slaughtered for meat. Goat meat is extremely popular globally, so although you may not have personally eaten it, there is a huge demand for it. And out of all the goats raised in the U.S., more than 80 percent are raised for meat, according to the National Agricultural Statistics Service. Many goats are sold at auction and end up in city live-slaughter markets.

Za and Lucie on the mend (we don’t have pictures of their arrival, since they went straight to Cornell for care).

And auction and slaughter were the fate designated for Lucie and her daughter Za when the person who’d raised them decided they had too many goats and needed to “downsize.” The pair was slated for a trip to the New Holland Auction in Pennsylvania — but luckily, they ended up at a horse sanctuary. And these two were not goats who would have wound up as companion animals, since they are terrified of humans. And their rescuer was even more concerned over their fate, because Lucie was very pregnant.

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So I’ve seen my share of ‘humans are weird,’ ‘humans are cuddly,’ ‘humans will strap a knife to a cleaning robot and name it Stabby,’ etc. on Tumblr, but what I haven’t seen so far is ‘humans are hilarious when startled’.

Think about it. I imagine most life-forms experience fear, surprise, or shock, but what if they tend to respond in drastically different ways? For example, with silence and hyperfocus allowing them to either beat a hasty retreat or overcome the danger through stealth and cunning? What if humans’ outsized startle reactions make us, essentially, the fainting goats of the galaxy, and therefore funny as hell?

The Galactic InfoNet would be flooded with holos of particularly entertaining incidents, of course. There would be debates over whether or not it’s cruel to the humans, whether or not it has a detrimental effect on their health. (Some humans seem to enjoy it, though, and the most popular videos DO feature them laughing with their crews afterward.) And, naturally, ‘startle the human’ would be a popular game aboard starships with mixed crews, or at least an initiation ritual when a new crewmate comes aboard, with new humans being startled and new non-humans having to find creative ways to startle the humans who have already been through it all. There would be so much disappointment when a human doesn’t startle easily (because of course humans have a wide range of startle reactions and thresholds) that some of the nicer ones would try to fake it. Several of us would fake it badly.

But it gets better. Because some of us, when startled, get punchy.

“You have a human aboard!? P’partok’s antennae, this is going to be great!”

No, Commander Xelthorp’p. I know what you’re thinking, and no. The captain and the chief medical officer have issued a strict prohibition. No one is to deliberately startle Lieutenant Deborah Peabody, friend-designate: Deb.”

“What? Oh, no, they’re not among those who think startling humans is cruel, are they?”

“No, nothing like that. In fact, the captain zirself initiated the startling ritual when Deb first came on board. Ze hid in the storage unit in her quarters and, when her back was turned, ze slid open the door, crept up behind her and loomed ominously before touching Deb’s arm-torso joint with a tentacle. It did not end well.”

“Did Lieutenant Peabody injure herself?”

“No. It turned out that Deb is trained in an adaptive form of an Earth fighting style known as ‘Krav Maga’. She did yell entertainingly, but then turned, disabled the captain’s olfactory organ, ruptured the cartilage in zir primary dorsal tentacle, and wrestled zir to the ground before paging security. The first officers on the scene apparently fell into fits of hysterical laughter and had to be threatened with insubordination charges before they stopped.”

“She assaulted her captain?!”

“Yes. Under the circumstances, the captain chose not to bring her up on charges, but instead institute alternative disciplinary measures. Lieutenant Peabody’s Adaptive Krav Maga class is now mandatory for all senior officers. You will be pleased to know the captain has largely recovered, though ze still has some trouble smelling breen and glor’ka.”

anonymous asked:

Dexzimbits w Jack teasing em about living in the same Haus (like theyre married Jack says, looking into marrying them) and Bitty letting Dex know he can sleep in his room*wink wink* if he and Nursey argue

Bless you for this, anon. 

Ok we have to get some shit out of the way because Deximbits diverges a wee bit from canon. Mainly, this is one of my “Dex has two moms” universes so there isn’t the same internalized homophobia that you’d get out some of my other universes. So Nursey and Dex really butted heads as Frogs because of siblings. See Nursey has a chill demeanor that makes Dex think of his older brother Dylan (who in this universe is a real dick, but I digress). Meanwhile you have Nursey who was raised on a flurry of nannies. Yea he has an older sister but they’re six years apart (and she had the benefit of having a year or two of her parents in her memory bank and was mainly raised by one nanny, Nursey tries not to resent the stability she had but yea…) This is a Nursey who didn’t interact with his parents much as a child. He’s super fucking used to being alone in a large house. And his parents were only interested in him when he got to be older/his own person/”interesting’. He’s really into being the coolest person in the room because of abandonment issues. However, his sister always treats him like the annoying twerp older siblings are stereotypically supposed to treat their younger siblings. Which means when this goofy, grumpy guy from Maine becomes his d-partner, Derek was really fucking excited and showed his affection the only way he knew how. Cue, Derek “Stop Hitting Yourself” Nurse. So their fights were a little less heated and little more petty in the beginning and Dex learned that just because his family was the black sheep in a small town in the middle of nowhere, it doesn’t mean that he doesn’t have privileges.

Ok so while Nursey and Holster were convinced that Dex was dating Lardo, Nursey was a little…lowkey…bitter about the whole dibs situation. Because Shitty gave his to Lardo and obviously Lardo definitely will give hers to Dex. Which makes sense in that Dex fixed the dryer like eight times that year alone. And there was all the stuff with Betsy before she broke down. But between Shitty’s old room, and Bitty, it’s like you have to be dating someone in the Haus to get dibs.

He tells Chowder this (who still doesn’t believe that Lardo and Dex are dating) and he receives the biggest fucking glare ever.

Also important to know: NurseyCharmer is a thing in this universe.

“What?” Nursey balks slightly. 

Chowder’s lip twitches. “If that’s the rule, I think you’ll be alright.”

“Yeah…” he relents. “I’m sorry. This is really unchill of me.”

“Derek,” Chowder sighs. “There’s three dibs up for grabs, and you’re really important to the team. Why are you worried?”

Nursey shrugs. “I know he deserves to live here too. But what if everything I’ve done isn’t enough? And there was nothing I could do about it?”

“Then there’s nothing you can do about it,” Chris reiterates calmly. He picks some of pills off of Nursey’s shirt. It calms them both. “Lardo’s not like that, you know.”

“Yea…”

“And you’ve been helping her with all those papers,” Chowder reminds him.

Nursey pouts, “true.”

“Just keep doing what you’re doing. You’re a good friend.”

Nursey kisses him softly, “thanks, C.”

So Nursey does his thing, and then everyone finds out about Deximbits. Which is really funny once Nursey moves past the whole “I thought you were cheating on Lardo and Shitty, aka my bffls,” thing. Dex, however, can be a bit of a petty bitch.

“You’re not still mad at me are you?”

“A little?” Dex frowns while they go around the quad, handing out manager wanted flyers.

“But we cleared everything up?” Nursey jostles Dex’s shoulder amicably.

Dex sighs, “I know. You’re right.”

“But…’’

“If I accused you of cheating on Ransom and Holster in front of Chowder and Farmer, you’d be a little pissed at me, right?”

“Ok, yea,” Nursey clears his throat.

Dex frowns, nudging Derek him gently. He offers a fist bump. “We’re still gonna be the best roommates, right?”

Nursey smirks, “you know it.”

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