You’ll need to excuse my puffy tired face, it was the Stepford Wife Christmas party at Etd’s office last night and things Hurt™ and I’m Exhausted but I’m feeling hella cute anyway so here we are.
Two weeks after the whole awful haircut thing with the rude stylist, I decided to try the new salon that opened up across the street from my old one and the experience was worlds apart. I came in, I sat down, they made me tea, and then Ande–an ex military tech turned hair stylist with a buzz cut and absolutely covered in tattoos–asked me about my hair and my lifestyle and what look I wanted to achieve.
“Not dead” got a laugh, until I told him about my chronic illness issues, after which he got very serious, asking how much energy I had to spend on hair, could I blow dry it myself, what about allergies to products, what health supplements am I taking. I told him what the other stylist had said about my hair being too thin to work with and how she said I’d need hair extrnsions to look pretty again, and then he went even more silent.
After a few minutes of silently assessing my hair and playing with it, he caught my eye in the mirror and told me I have a lot of new growth and it’s really healthy hair with excellent movement at the root, so that’s good, but also the reason my hair looked so flat and lifeless was because it had been cut by someone who didn’t know how to cut hair, and he was sorry someone had been so mean to me. And then he asked again if I was able to hold my hair dryer for long periods of time, (advised I get a lighter salon type one cause appatently they are hella lighter and easier to use) and would I mind if he took several more inches off to make a Look. I told him that was fine and then he told me he was going to dry cut my hair to see where my natural hair pattern fell, wash it, then trim it again before drying it.
Even with my hair being a dry, static mess, ten minutes in to the cut I could see the immediate difference in the shape. He was so enthused by my nautural wave too which was really nice, cause most stylists tell me it’s difficult to work with and try to either flat iron the shit out of it or over curl it to make it “better”.
When the time came to tip my head back into the sink he was very careful of my neck and shoulders, guiding me down by hand rather than trusting the mechanics of the chair. He asked if the angle was causing any pain issues and if I needed to sit up to let him know.
It was quite possibly the least painful, stress free haircut I’ve ever had, and I’m so happy with the end result. My hair looks full and super cute and only took ten minutes to blow dry this morning. It’s amazing, I love it :)
often times, i hear the words “oppression” and “liberation” be thrown at me. you are oppressed because you are not liberated enough in what you wear. you are not liberated because you are oppressed in what you wear. so what’s liberation? is it me standing on a beach in western clothes with the skin on my arms showing, basking in the sun? is that what being liberated means? or is that me showing too much skin for a muslim girl? is liberation me wearing a tight fitted flowery maxi dress? or is that a little too tight?
and am i oppressed by covering myself entirely with my abayah, with no skin showing? but wait, i’m wearing a face full of makeup, though? is that too much? or wait, is me wearing a bright pink colour on top of my abayah too “out there”? is that me being a bit too loud and calling attention?
and then i wonder … how can i be oppressed if i can wear all these things, make all these choices in how i want to dress myself, and be happy and myself in all these things? wearing a full face of make up, wearing bright colours, wearing western clothes, and showing my skin a little bit, whether that be at home or on the beach, or covering myself entirely in my abayah with nothing on show. how am i oppressed when i, a happy muslim girl, can make all these choices in what i want to wear, in what i decide to wear, and noone can tell me, or has the right to tell me, if what i am wearing is “oppressing” or “liberating” enough.
since when did judging my level of freedom and happiness come from how you perceive it, and that too, in what clothes i am wearing? but wait, if i do this, then i’m being too much, and if i do that, i’m doing too less.