For the last couple years, I’ve comforted myself by saying I’m in my
“early 70s,” but math is simple and unforgiving. Today is my 75th
birthday, and God, the years do fly.
I’m not here for your well wishes; this is hardly a milestone I’m
excited about. I’m glad to still be here, of course, but I find I have
less and less to live for with every passing year. My bones ache, my
kids live far away, and the other side of my bed has been empty for just
over eight months now. In fact, once I cast my vote against that
goddamned Trump this November, I may have nothing to live for at all.
Hey there everyone! WHOO! Finally got a reprieve, as I’m done with my drawings for my final project, now I have to continue typing the written parts.
Done largely in part because I love the lore, practice drawing human characters, and to pass the time whenever I need a breather from from college.
While researching for the lore of Dark Souls for my In-progress AU Comic, I noticed how LARGE the mythology of Dark Souls and the deities that reside, along with the fan speculation of which god corresponds with whom and etc. In spite of all this, from what I can tell, outside of Gwyn’s family, there has never been a, for lack of a better term, “compendium piece” of the gods and goddesses of dark souls, so I made my own :D
Because some gods are not represented in imagery, I decided to design how they might look if they ever showed up amongst mortals. I owe a lot to Tumblr, Reddit and the DS fandom as a whole, the amount of theory and lore discussions are always gold, and of course, the lore-lords like @vaatividya and @silver-mont, their vids are always interesting to watch :)
From the Top Row: The Bearers of the Lord Souls
Gravelord Nito: No need for an explanation here xD
Gwyn, Lord of Sunlight: Drawing him was easy, but here I wanted portray a very stern, no-nonsense god king who really, REALLY is someone you don’t want to piss off, and someone who is almost NEVER happy and/or satisfied.
The Witch of Izalith: I’m honestly surprised there’s not much fanart of how her face might look like, so I pitched in. She basically resembles her daughters, but with a more matriarchal vibe, with a stronger jawline and sharper eyes to reflect that. She’s also very tall, towering over Gwyn and just slightly edging out NK in height.
The Furtive Pygmies, featuring Manus and a Pygmy Lord: With the Ringed City revealing that there were SEVERAL pygmies, I had quite some fun with the speculation and possibilities of how the Pygmies as a whole looked like.
Personally? I simply interpret them as humans but more, with more power over the dark soul, but otherwise having different roles in society like regular folk, the Ringed Knights are Warriors, the Lords are the rulers, etc.
I put Manus amongst them, why? Because no way should ONE man be able to have THAT much abyss power just because he’s a human. Since the dark soul is divided amongst humans, I interpret him having a huge chunk of the Dark Soul(as per these twothreads), and thus was simply a mighty sorceror who happened to be really, REALLY old, even by Pygmy standards. Plus I always wondered… How does one torture a dead man? The Mad King was described as undying, so according to my own logic, he wasn’t totally “dead” when he was buried. His grave could signify him wanting a modicum of peace, after all, his entire race was basically put in a glorified prison by Gwyn… Sensing the growing madness within him (probably due to sheer isolation), he probably decided to “die” on his own terms in Oolacile… then future idiots proceeded to listen to TOTALLY NOT SUSPICIOUS AT ALL SERPENT and dug up his grave.
The random Pygmy Lord is basically representing one of the first Pygmy Lords.
Second Row: The Children of the Gods
The Nameless King, Firstborn of Gwyn, God of War: In a short period of time, has become my favorite character amongst the gods… There’s so much of a story to tell from him, his relationship with his family, the reasons as to WHY he betrayed the dragons, and thanks to lore threads a-plenty, I interpret him as one of the most honorable and dedicated of the gods. He watches over his warriors of sunlight even if they ARE humans (whom Gwyn HATES) AND he protects Dragons. Despite meI head-canoning him bigger than Gwyn and is in general a wall of muscle and armor, he’s STILL shorter than his sisters.
Gwynevere, Goddess of Fertility: Gwynevere here I interpret as one of the nicer gods, so I made her expression to reflect such. Because Gwyndolin’s illusion of her may be simply him projecting what he remembers most of her and thuspotentially exaggerating certain aspects, I toned down a lot the “Aphrodite-esque” glamor, in favor of a more personable look, though still decked out.
Filianore: The daughter we know even less of than Gwynevere, but thanks to a certain reddit thread that discussed how dedicated NK was to her via the floral carvings that is present in Archdragon peak… She must have been someone who NK was VERY close with, so I interpret her as the “Always trying to bring life to the family” kind of sister, though closest to her eldest brother.
Gwyndolin: The Dark Sun himself. Not much else to say here, I just wanted to draw him happy for once… Because WHY FROM? He really, really needs it.
The Daughters of Chaos
Quelana, Mother of Pyromancy: Due to her own title, I interpret her as the Studious Daughter, incredibly dedicated to her craft and always finding out ways to further her pyromancy… Until the Chaos Flame incident happened of course… Then she became wracked with survivor’s guilt…
I also interpret her as being the responsible one looking out to make sure her sisters don’t do anything too brash… Though in hindsight, that would make her suvivor’s guilt worse.
Quelaag: The most well known Chaos Daughter, and whom I interpret as The Aggressive Daughter, hence why she’s the only one of the sisters with a melee weapon. As the most in-your-face daughter I head-canon that she is the one who lowers down her hood the most, especially when she feels like challenging someone. Also VERY protective of her family.
Quelaan, The Fair Lady: Last but not least, I interpret Quelaan as always having been the shyest and nicest of the daughters. Her hood is more drooped down compared to Quelana, to highlight her shyness.
Fun fact, while trying to find her real name, turns out the name Quelaan was the name the community gave to her, and just became established fanon, so I just opted to name her just that.
Third Row: Other Members of the Larger Pantheon
All-Father Lloyd: Gwyn’s uncle, founder of the Way of White. Now there IS speculation that he’s not real, but here I interpret as the real deal, and thus looks like a wimpier, older version of Gwyn, yet still has an aura of authority. I used a bit of Paladin Leeroy for his crown, because I interpret that, when he REALLY needs to get his hands dirty, he too wields a mace, setting an example to all paladin-esque worshipers after him.
His clothes are tattered despite being the godly equivalent of a pontiff, to highlight two things:
One, despite him being a “lord”, his tattered look is to signify he is not “above” the rabble/his followers.
Two, I head-canon him becoming slowly more insane and full of hate toward the undead,as more and more of his family and friends either dies off or leaving home… He eventually disappears for unknown reasons and becomes forgotten.
Fina, Goddess of Love: The most popular candidate for Gwyn’s wife, or at least his first, I wanted to design her with the Embraced Set in mind, just modified to look more queenly rather than armor. Going by the general fanon, I interpret her as the mother of both NK and Gwynevere, but due to unknown circumstances, just up-and-left. Why? I dunno I haven’t thought that deep :(
Also wanted to try out and giving her a different look, skin-tone and facial wise compared to all the other gods and goddesses out there.
Velka, Goddess of Sin: My favorite goddess, her lore and weaponry associated with her is cool, but even with DS3 and all its DLC, I wish we got to know more of her and how she even became the one to hold the title of “goddess of sin” and how she absolves it. She is also, I noticed in fan-art and fanfic, the other most popular candidate for Gwyn’s wife.
Due to the fact that both Gwyndolin and Filianore are associated with illusions and magic, I interpret her as the mother of Filianore and Gwyndolin. She has sharp features and very pale skin, and share’s Filianore’s dark hair.
For her design, I compared aspects of the Statue of Velka from DS3, and both Oswald of Carim and Cromwell the pardoner. I didn’t want her to strictly dress like Oswald and Cromwell, so I incorporated more feathers to her outfit to give her a more “regal” look, as befitting a goddess, and not just pardoner. Funnily enough, with her book of sins and outfit, she also gives the aura of a medieval judge.
Caitha, Goddess of Tears: The third goddess associated with Carim, and one that I intentionally kept her eyes hidden. Mentioned in both 2 and 3, I want to reflect her constant “mourning” nature, and since ‘Gentle Prayer’ is associated with her chime in DS3, I thought her being in a position of prayer would be most appropriate.
Nahr Alma, God of Blood and Murder: Take Titchy Gren, make him more beast-like in proportion, now make him the size of Father Ariandel with the animalistic agility of the Orphan of Kos or Slave Knight Gael, and you have the God of Blood himself. I interpret him as a kind of god that is shunned by the rest, and is mostly treated as an attack dog, and nothing more. REALLY resents the other gods.
-shiro is missing. everyone is devastated. allura tries getting Lance to move lions, but blue raises her particle barrier and doesnt let Lance out. lance gives blue permission to put him into a cyro-frozen sleep state for however long he needs to be, just so blue wont be taken from him like his family
-keith gets to be the black paladin. lance gets dissed and doesnt get any credit for anything he does, while keith gets all the attention now. lance ends up angry kissing keith while crying, sobbing out his fears and insecurites while keith hisses out apologies and kisses his cheeks.
-lance runs from the castle after some incident with allura yelling at him in a fit of rage. he ends up at the balmera somehow, and he is given comfort and love from the balmera and it’s inhabitants while no one on the castle notices him missing. they realize after a day or two. then they go looking for him. (he doesn’t want to go back, not really)
-lance suddenly realizes how useless he is in regards to how everyone reacts with each other, he’s just the outlier that makes everyone roll their eyes and groan whenever he so much as speaks. he ends up sobbing his heart out in his room, not quite noticing that his comm is on. (coran and hunk get to him first. then pidge does. shiro and keith are busy training.)
-blue starts learning to speak in spanish for him. he starts crying because he’s so so homesick and blue is actually making an effort to cheer him up (because no one else would).
-coran marks some points on the star map that lance was looking at. lance and coran bond over the stars and memories of their homes. allura eventually joins them, and lance and the princess bond over their families and rain.
-lance turns out to be faintly altean. coran and allura are overjoyed. lance doesn’t want another family.
-Lotor ends up legitimately falling in love with lance after he manipulated lance. after the paladins rescue lance, lotor ultimately turns to the reasoning of, ‘if I can’t have him, no one can’. lance is then either recaptured or killed.
Ruth Ellis, the LGBT rights activist and oldest known lesbian to
ever live, was born on this day in 1899 and would have turned 118-years-old
Ruth Ellis poses for the camera as she leans against a car in 1951 (x).
Ruth was born on July 23, 1899 in Springfield, Illinois as her
parents fourth child and first daughter. Her mother and father, Charles and
Carrie Ellis, were former slaves from Tennessee but the abolition of slavery
allowed them to move north and build a prosperous life for themselves and their
family. Ruth’s mother died when she was young, but her father became the first
black mail carrier in the state of Illinois and managed to put three of his
children, Ruth included, through high school. Ruth would graduate from
Springfield High School in 1919.
Ruth came out to her family as a lesbian when she was just
16-years-old, which was an unheard-of admittance in 1915! She would also recall
meeting her partner, Babe, just five years later in 1920. For the next 30 years, Ruth and
Babe would live together in Detroit, Michigan, where their home eventually
became a major hub for the city’s black gay and lesbian community. Ruth also
became the first black woman to ever operate her own printing company in the
whole city of Detroit; the business specialized in printing stationary, fliers,
and posters, and was operated out of her and Babe’s home.
Ruth is photographed hard at work operating the printing press that fueled her successful small business (x).
Ruth and Babe eventually separated because, as Ruth said, “We
were just two opposite people.” Although the refuge of Ruth and Babe’s home
ceased to exist, Ruth remained incredibly involved in the LGBT community and reached somewhat of a celebrity status in the 1970s. She became noticed as a frequent
attendee of the Michigan Womyn’s Music Festival and eventually began being
asked to speak at different universities around the country about her
experience as an out lesbian in the pre-Stonewall days. Her 100th
birthday was celebrated with the release of the documentary Living with Pride: Ruth C. Ellis @ 100
and that same year Ruth was the honorary leader of the San Francisco Dyke March.
A special photo shoot to celebrate Ruth’s 100th birthday shows her smiling sweetly and holding a bouquet of flowers (x).
Ruth passed away peacefully in her sleep on October 6, 2000
when she was 101-years-old. The Ruth Ellis Center in Detroit continues to be
operated in her memory and is one of only four American organizations specifically
dedicated to housing LGBT youth.
Summary: in an AU where the Winchester family owns a multi-million dollar company, Dean’s in a bit of a pinch. Grandpa Samuel is threatening to cut him off if he doesn’t straighten out and stop getting into trouble. Instead of taking some responsibility, Dean comes up with an ingenious plan: find someone to pretend to be his girlfriend. You and Dean have never gotten along, but a fake relationship seems to be beneficial to you both…
Part 5 -
Dean struggles to deal with the rest of the morning, and then gets an unexpected call. The two of you go on a double date with Sam and Jess.
Part 6 -
Jess informs you about Dean’s past, and Sam teases Dean. After dinner, Dean brings you home to find someone unexpected waiting for you, and helps you deal with it.
Part 7 -
Dean meets your mother, and you go dress shopping with Jess.
Part 8 -
You and Dean head out to his hometown, where you finally get to meet Mary and John. The sleeping situation causes some minor problems.
Part 9 -
You and Dean have an interesting morning, but Sam interrupts. Later, you and Mary have a little heart to heart, and Dean says something surprising.
Part 10 - The gala finally arrives, and Dean is absolutely floored by your dress. An interaction with Samuel leaves Dean fuming, but you calm him down. Dean finally admits his feelings.
Part 11 -
Dean reflects on the evening, and the two of you have a talk
Part 12 -
someone delivers some unexpected and unpleasant news, sending you running. Sam and Benny confront Dean, and the three of them go looking for you.
Part 13 -
you head to the only safe place you can think of. A talk with your father gives you the courage to return to work, where Dean finds you immediately. But he’s not expecting your reaction. Charlie and Cas come to the rescue.
Part 14 -
Dean tries to cope with your breakup, and then gets a surprise visit from Crowley. Your friends take you out to try and cheer you up, but eventually you head home alone, only to find someone waiting for you.
Part 15 -
You have an encounter with Mark, and Dean shows up just in time. The next morning, the two of you talk things out. Sam arrives with some news.
Part 16 (conclusion) -
Dean responds to Sam’s news. The two of you pay a visit to Samuel, who lashes out. Secrets are revealed and threats are made, leaving you reeling. You and Dean discuss the future.
Epilogue - A few months after the events of part 16. Sam and Jess’s wedding, a housewarming party, and revealing conversations.
Epiloge Part 2 - The Fourth of July finds you and the Winchester clan at the lake to celebrate the holiday. Jess shares some news and Dean surprises you with an important question.
*A lot of people have come up with this theory, but it’s so perfect I had to write it down.
They say you learn the most from your mistakes. Mine came as I was watching “Murder Most Foul” and Charming said this:
I hadn’t really been paying enough attention to realize that he was talking about the sleeping curse that the Evil Queen had placed on him and Snow, so my mind immediately went to: What other curse needs to be broken? Luckily for me there is another curse that needs to be broken. Many of you know this, but it’s the curse that is keeping everyone in Storybrooke.
What we don’t realize is which part of the curse is still active. It’s not the dark aspects of the Dark Curse - that was broken by Emma as was prophesied/dictated by Rumpelstiltskin. No, it’s the other part that the pesky imp created that is trapping everyone here still.
The Savior curse. Think about it. The only reason Emma Swan is the Savior is because Rumplestiltskin made it so. In theory, Emma was no longer supposed to be the Savior after she broke the Dark Curse. Everyone was supposed to go back to where they were from, but that didn’t happen. Which means what? That portion of the curse, that tiny little drop, is a curse all in itself, and it too needs to be broken. When it is, Emma’s fate as the Savior will be broken; she will live.
Now you ask: But Emma was given the Shears of Destiny or whatever to cut herself from her fate and no longer be the Savior and she didn’t take it!
Well, we know how Rumple’s curse works right? A pair of pretty scissors wouldn’t break this curse because only one person has that power: Emma herself.
We’ve come full circle. Once upon a time Adam and Eddy pitched the idea that the curse would take seven years to fully break. Now we’ve reached that point. Once Emma breaks the Savior curse, Rumple’s spell that he placed on her life will break. Her Hero’s Journey will be complete, and she will return to her life in the real world, where no one needs her to protect them.
(I’ll come back to this in a minute)
So we know what needs to happen. Here I take it a step further and answer:
It turns out that we have that answer too:
Ah yes. True Love. Here’s where I know I’ll lose half of you because “Once Upon a Time is obsessed with Captain Swan. Why can’t you see that, you’re blinding yourself, stop perpetuating nonsense, wake up blah blah blah blah.”
Well, I’m going to counter that with: Why is Emma still the Savior then? If Once Upon a Captain Swan is genuinely the entire point of this show, why is Emma still fated to die?
Answer: You can’t break a curse where you’re the Savior of the fairytale characters with one of the said fairytale characters.
Here you respond again with: “Well, Smartypants, you call yourself a Swan Queen shipper, but you’ve just contradicted yourself. You think the Evil Queen can break the curse with Emma? She’s a fairytale character too!”
Well, reader, you are very clever indeed. But shall I provide you with my next exhibit:
While it was super fun to watch, Split Queen was not just done for the optics. It was a setup for endgame. The Evil Queen may be a fairytale character, but Mayor Regina Mills (like Emma and Henry) is a completely original creation of our world. Which means, like Emma, the daughter of Prince Charming and Snow White, she can live a completely normal life outside of the Enchanted Forest.
I was trying to figure out the purpose behind bringing Wish Robin Hood back, and this line really explains it:
The writers are priming us for a much bigger version of this concept. Robin is the first test of the portal system. Will it allow someone who isn’t supposed to be “real” stay in the “real world”? We know Storybrooke, by our standards, isn’t a real place, it’s a refuge for fairytale characters from many realms, so it makes sense that he passes the test in this case, but what about Regina? Will she, a person who isn’t supposed to be real, be allowed to live somewhere like Boston or New York if Storybrooke doesn’t exist. This first trial proves that yes, she will be able to because something about her is connected to our world (that thing is literally the writers themselves). They have Regina grapple with this issue- Why was wish Robin able to come here?- because she’s next, and she needs to know that she’ll be okay when she tries to stay in this world.
If Regina remains unconnected to the Evil Queen, she should be able to help Emma break the curse and remain in this reality. Will it really be True Love’s Kiss that frees Emma from the Savior Curse and sends everyone to where they belong?
I would hope.
I also hope that I’ll find $2000 on the street tomorrow, but that doesn’t mean it’ll happen.
But it’s certainly the most reasonable solution since literally every curse is broken with True Love’s Kiss…
Have you ever wondered why there’s never been a True Love’s Kiss with Emma & her parents or Emma with Hook? Perhaps part of that is because True Love’s Kiss can only work with people who are from the same reality. Since Regina had True Love’s Kiss with Henry, that means she’s a part of his reality. Part of her belongs in our world. Emma has never shared True Love’s Kiss with Hook because he isn’t a part of her reality. He’s still a fairytale character. They can get married, she can choose that life, but that means she will remain tied to her fate as the Savior. She will always be connected to the Fairytale world. She will eventually die for them.
But if somehow, Regina Mills is Emma’s true True Love; if two “real people” who were created in this world- Emma Swan the bail bonds person, and Regina Mills the Mayor- shared True Love’s Kiss (not saying they’ll make it gay like they should) then the entire curse could be broken.
I just don’t see any other way they could go with this. The show has always foreshadowed that Storybrooke isn’t supposed to last.
We know there’s going to be a “reset” for the show…
And we know that Regina is no longer connected to the Evil Queen. Everything is setting up for the fairytale characters to return to their world.
But what happens next?
A good story always comes full circle, but the hero returns home with more knowledge and is in a better place. Odysseus goes on a crazy journey with a bunch of messed up shit but eventually makes it back home. Dorothy wishes she could experience life over the rainbow, but when she does, she learns that there’s no place like home. Harry Potter steps onto Platform 9 ¾ for the first time alone, and in the last book he steps on with a family. So if in the Pilot we see Emma in her lonely Boston apartment, wishing on a star to no longer be alone, it only makes sense that the last time we see her, she’s in her Boston apartment but she isn’t alone- she has a family.
We know Henry will be a part of that family, but it’s safe to assume that Regina will be there too, because of this promise:
Unfortunately all magic comes with a price, and my prediction is that price will be that everyone forgets that any of this ever happened.
I’m grounding this theory in the fact that the last time there was a reset, that happened to half of the parties involved: Emma and Henry
In that scenario, the Dark Curse was destroyed. The Dark Curse’s purpose was to create Storybrooke, so once it was gone, Emma and Henry forgot that Storybrooke ever existed… But everyone in the Enchanted Forest still remembered Emma and Henry because the Savior Curse still existed- they all remembered the Savior. They were able to go back and get her and recreate the bridge between our worlds because Emma was still the Savior. Once the Savior Curse is gone, everything will be wiped out. Everyone will forget that the Savior existed, and why she existed. All the fairytale characters will return to their world where their stories will play out, and all the characters from our world will begin to lead a normal life.
That life for Emma and Regina could very well be together. It’s not guaranteed, but it would certainly explain why the writers have made an effort to keep Emma and Regina apart in Storybrooke while maintaining a certain amount of tension between them- because their story isn’t meant to play out in Storybrooke. It would also explain why it’s not a topic of conversation for any of the writers or actors- it’s a major plot point, and talking about it would be a spoiler. Lastly, Adam Horowitz said himself that they weren’t queerbaiting:
If they’re planning on having Regina be a part of Emma’s new life free from the Savior curse, then technically this isn’t a lie.
But could they make it so that Emma and Regina’s relationship is merely as platonic co-parents in the real world? Of course. But at the end of the day we would still be right: Swan Queen would still technically be endgame, and it’s still a hell of a lot better than Captain Swan.
Sidney and Geno are dating, but one day they have an argument. Maybe it’s over a dumb penalty one of them took, and Sidney is chewing Geno out for it, and that led to Geno accusing Sidney caring more about hockey than their relationship. Sidney is mad enough to be in tears (how could Geno ever think that of him?) as he storms off to their bedroom and slams the door shut, and Geno is still pissed so he sleeps on the couch.
Then Geno wakes up in a universe where not only does he still play for the Pens, he’s the captain. But Sidney is nowhere to be seen. In fact, no one’s ever heard of Sidney Crosby. He begins to panic.
“You just fuck with me now,” Geno says to Flower. Tanger and some of the rookies give him a nervous look. “No, really, where Sid. Not funny anymore.”
“We don’t know who that is, G,” Phil says. “Really.”
He’s about to have a panic attack when the Pens PR suddenly come up and ask if he’s ready to go deliver the season tickets. Geno, in a daze, lets him kind of guide him wherever, and soon he’s on his way, with the team and the Pens admin, to a little suburban house.
Geno does not want to deliver tickets, but he knocks and he’s ready to kind of shove the tickets at them and leave. Then the door opens and–
“Oh my God,” Sidney says. He’s in jeans and a Malkin jersey, but it’s Sid, his Sidney, not missing or dead and oh God, he’s right here. “You’re Evgeni Malkin. You actually came.”
“Sid,” Geno whispers.
He’s about to pull Sidney in for a kiss when a little boy peeks out from behind Sidney’s leg. “Dad, that’s Geno,” the boy says in wonder.
Geno watches, stunned, as Sidney picks up the boy and kisses his cheek. “This is my son,” Sidney says, smiling broadly. “Come in, come in–”
And Geno is led into this bizarro world where he meets Sidney’s fucking husband, the rest of the kids, Taylor, and Sidney’s parents, and he has to pretend that he isn’t losing it watching his boyfriend live a suburban life. Apparently, in this universe, Sidney had not played hockey after Shattuck. He went to university in Pittsburgh, married his college sweetheart (the football captain, to be exact. He’s handsome and tall and friendly, and it’s clear that he adores Sidney. Geno hates him immediately), has three kids with him who all adore the Penguins, and teaches at the local elementary school. And it’s breaking his heart watching Sidney live this perfect life, and knowing that he has no part in it.
anyways i want those angsty movie scenes where Geno keeps asking Sidney out on not-dates. It’s getting late, and Geno’s driving Sidney back home after yet another dinner.
“Sid, wait,” Geno says, as Sidney’s unbuckling his seat belt. Sidney looks at him in question. “Don’t go yet.”
“I still have some papers to grade–”
Geno covers Sidney’s hand with his, in one bold, sudden move. “Please don’t go.”
Sidney looks stunned, then pained. “Geno,” Sidney says softly. “Geno, I think I know what this is.”
“I have a family,” Sidney says. “You’ve been–you’re an incredible hockey player–and–and a wonderful friend, I mean–you’re Evgeni Malkin–”
“I’m show–” Geno fumbles with his phone, which miraculously had all the photos from his world. Photos of his Sidney kissing his cheek, of them lazing around after workouts, Geno and Sidney’s happiest moments.
He presses play on a random video, startling Sidney into freezing as in-video Sidney’s voice asks cheerily, “Geno, what should we do on your Cup day?”
I know, I’ve been busy. I’ve been raving over this series for the past week but I couldn’t get to a proper keyboard so I can a Proper Rave™ complete with gifs and sparklies.
Seriously, WHERE IS THE REST OF CASTLEVANIA, NETFLIX? YOU CAN’T LEAVE US HANGING WITH JUST FOUR BLOODY EPISODES, OKAY??!!!! I NEED THE NEXT SET OF EPISODES AND I NEED THEM NOW.
Fine, fine. I’ll be a proper grown up. I’ll stop sulking and wait patiently.
Let’s get on with the List of Things That I Really Love About Netflix’s Castlevania animated series:
a. Dracula - First off, Dracula is not a precious misunderstood Woobie Destroyer of Worlds. He’s evil. He’s got a dangerous labyrinth of a castle sitting smack dab in the middle of a forest of skeletons that are impaled on very long sharp stakes, his victims from years ago. Dracula is bored, mean and absolutely disgusted with humanity. Apparently, the only reason he doesn’t seem to be concocting some sort of Evil Plan to Cover the World in Eternal Night™ in the first few minutes we see him is because he can’t be arsed to anymore.
But he is a lot more complex than your average moustache-twirling baddie and in less than five minutes we get the idea that there’s still some ounce of humanity left in everyone’s favorite Evil King Vampire. He basically gets this OH NO SHE’S ADORABLE AND I LIKE HER SEND HELP look on his face once he gets properly acquainted with one Dr. Lisa Fahrenheights.
b. Lisa Fahrenheights - People who’ve played Castlevania: Symphony of the Night will know who she is and in the game, she’s pretty much portrayed as some sort of sanctified figure in a Certain Person’s memories. In this series, Lisa Fahrenheights is smart, sassy and willing to tell off the most dangerous vampire in the world for his bad manners. And while our acquaintance with her is painfully short, it gets pretty clear why Dracula would fall arse over cape for her.
And surprisingly, she genuinely seems to love him back and is apparently willing to believe he can be better than his Evil self without forgetting that he IS a terrifying Evil Dark Lord With Fangs™. We only get like 10 minutes to have her around and I’m actually willing to buy into the Dracula/Lisa love story far more than I did with Twilight or the Star Wars Anakin/Padme romance.
She’s genuinely a good person without being insufferably saintly and I hope we get to see more of her in flashbacks as this series progresses because LISA FAHRENHEIGHTS DESERVED BETTER GDI.
Seriously, in the Great List of Incredibly Stupid and Boneheaded Ideas™, accusing Dr. Lisa Fahrenheights Tepes (somehow, I get the feeling she and Vlad had a long and lively discussion about being his Princess/Lady/Countess and she stuck to her guns about being a Doctor) of witchcraft and then burning her alive at the stake is probably in the Top Three. Right beside the one that says, “Do not kill the Cinnabon Roll Son of the Dark Lord of the Sith while Darth Papa is actually there to see everything.”
Unfortunately, since this is the Middle Ages and we have all that bullshit about wise women being falsely accused and the Church being corrupt, so this clusterfuckery happens and of course, Vlad eventually comes home to find the house he built for his beloved destroyed and that he’s too late to save her. He can’t even get the chance to possibly turn her into a vampire.
Summary: After a patient urgently pleads you to go and help a friend of his, you naively agree to it. Little did you know, that you would get more than what you agreed to, when he leads you to a brothel, to help a dangerous prostitute named Jeon Jungkook.
Pairing: Jungkook x Reader (ft. Jin, but not romantically)
Genre: Smut (M), angst, mafia!au, prostitution!au
A/N:This is a dark and filthy story! Graphic descriptions of sex (masturbating, etc), heavy dom/sub undertones, drug use, vulgar language use……(alot of smut comes in later) This is a mature read! You have been warned!
“You’re a mistake! You
should have never even been born!” the group of nine-year old’s like yourself,
You were mindlessly walking
outside during recess, until a group of kids from your class cornered you. They
formed a circle around you, deciding to remind you of what kind of blasphemy
“Just leave me alone!”
you screeched back at them, just wanting to distance yourself. You tried to
leave, but there was no escape, as they would just push you back into the
middle of the circle.
“Where are you going
you little bitch?” a boy who was a bit taller than you mocks.
When you glare at him
to try to push past, he shoves you roughly back, making you fall on the cold
cement. You cringe when you skid against the ground, layers of skin from your
elbows and hands being ripped off.
Each of them laugh at
you, as you just sit still on the ground, not daring to look up at them. Why
did this always have to happen to you?
8:30 showed on your phone as you sat at the hotel lobby bar. A pianist played classical music in the corner of the room softly. The piece sounded familiar, but you couldn’t focus on the harmony. Your legs were a little chilly on the metal chair in your olive dress. You pulled down the hem wondering if it was too much for tonight; you told him to dress up, but you wondered if what you had on was too much.
Did it matter anyway? He was now fifteen minutes late at a 30 became a 31 on your clock. The bartender almost passed you until you caught his attention.
“Dirty martini please,” you told him, tapping your coaster.
He nodded before starting to make your drink. Your patience was wavering. He hadn’t texted you or messaged you about being late or on his way. A simple text just saying, “traffic is horrible. be there in five,” would suffice.
Your drink was delivered faster than you thought it would, but there was still no one walking into the hotel. You were the only one at the bar. Some had come to get a drink, but they were swept away by others, and that’s all you wanted. You wanted to be swept by someone; you wanted someone that demanded your attention but you always demanded theirs.
“Scotch, straight,” a man dressed in a suit and tie said as he walked up behind you to order. He laid down some cash next to your drink; you weren’t an expert on the price of a scotch, but you were sure he laid down too much, “and hers as well,” he finished.
WARNINGS: nsfw!, slight thigh riding, cunnilingus, oral (male receiving), unprotected sex, almost all porn n’ u gonna need a ton of holy water after reading
summary: after an edgy dinner with the Holland family (consisting much of teasing), both Tom and you eventually come home in dire need of each other’s touch
A/N: this involves the cum-kink (generally the act of playing around with you and your partner’s cum) and if you find that repulsive then i suggest you do not read this okay
After a really long day of fine dining with the Holland family, the tension coming from both Tom and you had built up —almost as if it could already be sliced with a blade. It was as if the whole formal dinner consisted of Tom frequently teasing and tortuously brushing his hand over the inside of your thighs and intentionally at close quarters with your core. And for hours you had to searingly bite on your lower lip, stifling any proximate moans.
Imagine attending a party and knowing that upstairs, behind a locked door, was the slain bodies of an elderly couple. In early April, 2017, 16-year-old Cassandra Bjorge and her 19-year-old boyfriend, Johnny Rider, from Lawrenceville, Georgia, threw a drug-fuelled house party at the home of her grandparents - Wendy and Randall Bjorge. What the guests didn’t know, however, was that before the party the teenagers had brutally murdered the elderly couple by bludgeoning them with a hammer and baseball bat before slitting heir throats.
Days passed and the bodies remained undiscovered while the teenage killers lived in the house as if nothing was amiss. During this time, the couple planned more murders, including the murder of Bjorge’s mother. On the 9th of April, they attacked Ryder’s sister and her boyfriend with a baseball bat. Luckily, the couple managed to escape and call the police but Bjorge and Ryder had already fled the home when police arrived. While attempting to track them down, police discovered the grim scene at Bjorge’s grandparent’s home.
Police eventually tracked the couple down who were hiding out in an apartment block in Suwannee. After an hour-long standoff, police got into the apartment to find the teenagers had self-inflicted knives wounds but were to make a full recovery. Neighbours were shocked by the heinous murders of Wendy and Randall who were known to be “very respectful people.” They were often spotted walking their dogs and chatting with neighbours. In 2016, the elderly couple won custody of Bjorge, who was known to be a habitual runaway.
Bjorge and Ryder are currently awaiting sentencing. The motivation behind the senseless murder is still unknown.
my dream place would be to live in a second story apartment where i can crack open a window and hear the summer breeze whooshing through some trees, people chatting and laughing, live music playing from a nearby cafe, bikes ringing their bells and pedaling by, catch an occasional scent of delicious food from a passerby, and have the sun shining into my room
You opened your eyes, taking a few minutes to let them adjust to the sunlight. Lately, falling asleep while on car rides had become a common thing for you. You looked right to see Jack with his eyes fixed on the road, oblivious to the fact that you had woken up.
You yawned and rubbed your eyes before feeling a hand on your leg “Slept well?” he asked, as he looked briefly at you before giving you a small smile.
“Not bad” you said, looking at the GPS and seeing that you were twenty minutes away from Brighton.
Your best friend Jack had convinced - dragged - you to go to Brighton with him for the weekend. All your other close friends in London were back in their hometowns visiting their families, so you had nothing better to do. You weren’t in the mood to spend a whole weekend at home by yourself, anyway.
You had met Jack’s sister, Anna, before. A few months ago, she had stayed at Jack and Conor’s new apartment for the weekend, and the two of you immediately clicked. She reminded you so much of Jack, it was unreal. His parents, however, were a mystery to you. Conor couldn’t go with you, so at least you hoped Anna wasn’t away at a friend’s house or something: spending the weekend with Jack and his parents would just be too awkward.
But you thought you didn’t have reasons to be nervous about it. You weren’t Jack’s girlfriend, and you didn’t need to pass any kind of test to get his parents’ approval. Yet, it seemed to you as if you were slowly driving to death.
“Is Anna at home?” you eventually asked Jack, who was taking a sip of his fizzy drink.
“Yeah, I believe so” he answered “Why’d you ask?”
You shrugged “Just wanted to see her” you said, which wasn’t exactly a total lie. At least you knew there would be five of you.
Eventually, you pulled into Jack’s parents’ driveway, and you took a long while to admire the outside of his house. It reminded you so much of your own, you kind of wished your parents hadn’t booked that last-minute trip to Spain so you could visit them instead. However, when a young girl exited the house and walked towards your car, a bright smile on her face, your homesickness went away rather quickly.
“Y/N!” she called you as you opened the door to give her a hug. She wrapped her arms around your torso as you rested your chin on her head, a sudden smell of freshly washed hair hitting your nose.
“How are you, girl?” you asked her, mimicking the contagious smile on her face.
“I have so many things to tell you” she said excitedly, and you gave her that look girls gave each other when a juicy topic was about to come up. She nodded, as if she had read your mind, and you laughed.
“Hello Jack, my beloved and ridiculously hot brother, it’s nice to see you too” Jack said, imitating Anna’s voice, as he walked towards you with two bags on his hands.
Anna laughed and went to give her brother a hug “I’ve missed you as well, dickhead” the girl said. Jack rolled his eyes, but kissed the top of her head afterwards. You took your bag from his hands and walked into the Maynard household.
His parents turned out to be more than delighted with your presence. They confessed having watched your YouTube videos, and having burst out laughing more than once. The feeling of awkwardness you thought you’d have earlier, vanished as soon as they both pulled you into a hug.
Jack turned out to be the embarrassed one. As soon as you went upstairs to Anna’s bedroom for a quick catch-up, both of his parents had gone up to him, a suspicious smile on their faces.
“What?” Jack chuckled as he looked up at them from the sofa, his cat purring as he stroked her side.
“We really like Y/N” his mum said, taking a seat next to him. He already knew something was up. He gave them a look “I mean, we already liked her when we saw her on your videos, but she’s even nicer in person”
“Yeah…” Jack said, suspiciously. He let out another nervous laugh “Where are you going with his?” The silly smile on his face couldn’t go away. Whenever someone talked about you, his features immediately softened, and his lips curved up in a not so subtle smile.
“We are just saying” his dad spoke, his hands inside his pockets. Jack could tell he was nervous, because Conor did the exact same thing when something was on his mind “That she’s a really good influence for you. She seems sweet and down-to-eart, that’s all”
The cat jumped off the sofa, making Jack cross his arms “I’m…I’m glad you like her” Jack felt uncomfortable. Although you weren’t his girlfriend, you were the first girl Jack had ever brought home, friends and all. His parents were rather surprised when they saw you two got along so well, remaining just friends up to that day. Because for them, it was so obvious that their little boy had more than friendly feelings towards you, and they were surprised he hadn’t made a move yet.
“We do” his mum said, nodding happily “So, does she have a boyfriend or something?” she asked, trying to sound cool and casual, but she failed.
“Mum, I know where you’re going” Jack said, not being able to supress a laugh “Just drop it”
She gave her husband a knowing look. He nodded “Jack” he said “It’s fine if you like her, buddy. Your mum and I started off as good friends as well, it’s okay to admit it”
Jack’s heart skipped a beat, and he stood up abruptly “I’m going for a walk” he said, ready to leave, when his dad grabbed his arm “Buddy” his voice was friendly, yet firm. Jack stopped on his tracks.
He didn’t want to talk about it with his parents. Y/N was the first girl he had ever fallen for, and he was scared. He was sure that if he kept telling himself that he didn’t lilke her like that, his feelings would go away. But love didn’t work like that.
He turned his head to look at his parents, and after a long silence, he spoke again “I’m afraid I’d hurt her if I tell her” it came out as rather a whisper, but his parents heard him perfectly.
His mum immediately pulled him into a hug, rubbing his back “Don’t be silly, Jack, please” she said, feeling the sadness on her son’s voice “Don’t you see how happy you make her?”
“I make her happy as a friend” Jack kept his voice low in case Anna and you decided to come downstairs “I’ve never had a girlfriend, I’m not good with feelings, I-”
“But there must be a reason why you like this girl so much, more than any other” his dad interrupted him.
At that moment, Jack didn’t stop to think. He poured his feelings right there, in front of his parents, in a way he thought he’d never be able to do “I love how she’s so laid-back and crazy, yet she knows when to be serious” he blurted out “She’s also really funny, there has not been a day she hasn’t made me laugh. She’s sensible, and she takes care of me when I’m sick, which happens like, every day” he chuckled. His eyes were fixed on the floor “I don’t know, I just think I don’t deserve her, like, I’d just break her heart because I’m a fucking idiot”
“You don’t sound like an idiot when you talk about her” his mum said, grabbing his hand “Jack, the fact that you’ve never cared about a girl enough to stick with her doesn’t mean you’ll never be able to do it”
“In fact, you’ve done it already” his father added.
“Do you really think you’d hurt her?” his mum asked him “Because Conor told me not long ago that you almost got into a fist fight with a random guy at a club because he was all over her”
Jack frowned “He told you?”
“It doesn’t matter, baby” his mum said, shaking her head “What matters is you look after her, and that’s no behaviour for someone who’d only hurt her if he’s with her”
Jack stayed silent for a moment, then nodded his head. His eyes were fixed on the floor again, too embarrassed by the topic to look at his parents “I like taking care of her” he said, almost whispering “And I’ve never felt that before for anyone”
His dad went up to him and clapped his back. There was no denying Jack was growing up, and his parents were glad it was because of such a lovely, kind-hearted girl “Why don’t you take her out for dinner tonight?” he suggested.
Suddenly, Anna and you irrumpted into the room, stopping abruptly at the sight of Jack with his parents “Did we interrupt something?” Anna asked, as she wasn’t used to see her brother looking so puppy-like. Soft eyes were uncommon for Jack, or so she thought.
“No, it’s fine, sweetheart” her mum said, smiling brightly at both of you “We were just catching up”
“We were as well” Anna said, turning her head to look at you. She winked “I was just about to ask Y/N when she was marrying Jack” she joked, making you blush.
“Anna, don’t be rude” her dad said, but he couldn’t deny he was amused by the situation.
“It’s not like we were gonna invite you anyway” Jack spoke, putting an arm casually around your shoulders. He was back to his own sassy self again. Anna stuck her tongue at her brother before following her parents’ track to the kitchen area.
You then felt Jack’s lips pressed against the side of your head, a huge comfort speading inside your body. You loved when he did that “Wanna go out for dinner tonight?” he asked you, catching you off-guard “Just you and me”
You looked up at him, a small smile forming on your lips “Sounds great”
Anna entered the living room again, coughing as she walked past you “Wedding” she said after fakingly clearing her voice. Jack extended an arm to push her, and she ran away, laughing uncontrollably.
“You’re not allowed to be the godmother to our children either”
“And they’ll be bloody gorgeous” you added, making Jack push you playfully as well.
“They’ll just be weird if you’re their mum” Jack joked.
“You’ll love them anyways” you teased back.
“I love anything that has to do with you” he said, pulling you in for a hug.
“You’re stupid” you said, your head resting on his pounding chest.
“Shut up, Mrs. Maynard”
“What makes you think I’m taking your last name?”
“You love me way too much?” you hit him again. He grabbed your hands and put them around his neck. He planted a soft kiss on the tip of your nose
You smiled softly, still not used to all the things that boy made you feel “Maybe I do”