the dress i wanted as a kid but never had

Santa, Daddy

Daddy Santa Cass and the reader in an elf costume. @alexispoo

This is basically pure smut. I usually try to have some kind of plot but the plot left rather quickly…

@blondekel77 @wweismyguiltypleasure



@charlitflair @lip-sync @emmarablack @lunaticfringe216 @amberhere-hi @thatonegirloncealways @queenreignsempire @debeauxmots @kittencutie245 @ilovesamizaynn @banrioncethlenn @screamersdontdance @redalternativefirefly @filthy-parade @welshwitch5 @nickysmum1909 @msgem @uberduber-loulou @cutester @harleyquinnnikki @lclb12 @imagines–assemble @wrasslin-rollins @xenofi  @daywalker666 @heilisk @racheo91 @lilmisscrisis  @alexispoo




@caramara3         @underwaterwonderwoman

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A year ago my mother mentioned in passing that she miscarried 4 times before my brother was born.

I didn’t know I could grieve over someone I never knew.

But I had always said my mother was born to be a mother, nurture was in her instinct. She was strong enough to keep trying.

In 7th grade art class the girls at my table talk about what they want to name their children.
When they ask me, I say I don’t want kids.

What I didn’t know was that I still wanted the option.

I’m getting dressed for PE freshman year of high school.
We are about to go for a run and it’s cold outside.
I offered the girl next to me my jacket, because she didn’t have one.
She told me, “You’re like a mother.”
When I asked why, she said it was because I always wanted what was best for people.

Class is about to begin. A toddler is sitting behind my teachers desk. “Why is there a kid here?” I ask. The boy across from me responds, “What, do you not like kids?”

I’m sitting on the couch with my boyfriend and he asks what I think our children will look like.
I tell him we should adopt.
He asks why.

I’m waiting for the concert to begin, it’s 9pm and I’m at a music festival with people I only half know.
I text my friend seeing where he wanted to meet up, but he never responded.
The next day when I asked him why, he said “I was high, and you’re like family I didn’t want to disappoint you.”

First period honors biology, we are learning about genetics.
My lab partner and I are combining our traits to see what our “children” would look like.
What I learned that class is that you can love something that can’t exist.

My doctor gives me my test results back.
I go home and read articles written by women who have the same mutation and have recently miscarried.
I scroll through forums I read statistics.
They are all saying the same thing: you can’t.

I will let my nieces and nephews sleep at my apartment when they are mad at my brother.
I will pick up my friend’s kids from school and buy them that overpriced toy for Christmas.

I’ll love who I can, whenever I can.
Because that’s all I can do.

—  on being 16 and knowing I can’t have children

anonymous asked:

Kyle is the first person that Ali and Ash tell they are dating. I'd love to see how you write that situation

    “Ashlyn, you look fine.” Ali said for at least the hundredth time in the last hour.

    “Are you kidding me, Alex. That tie was horrendous. I am ashamed that I even bought that.”

    Ali sighed and walked over to Ashlyn. “Babe, we are just FaceTiming him. You don’t need to dress up. I mean, you don’t even have to wear pants and he’d never know.”

    Ashlyn finished tying her dark blue tie and went to the closet to grab a vest. Her and Ali had been dating for almost three months and they still hadn’t told anyone. Not because they didn’t want anyone to know, but just because they couldn’t figure out how to do it. Kyle seemed like the perfect person to start with. He was constantly pestering both Ali and Ashlyn about getting together and how perfect they would be as a couple.

    “I just want to give a good impression.”

    Ali thought that Ashlyn’s nervousness was the cutest thing she had ever seen. She hadn’t seen her this nervous since the first time she tried to ask Ali out. “Ash, Kyle has already met you and sometimes I think that he is more in love with you than I am. Don’t worry about your outfit.”

    Ali ran her hands down Ashlyn’s chest and smoothed out her tie. She helped Ashlyn button her vest and she rolled up the sleeves to Ashlyn’s dress shirt. Ali nodded approvingly. “Perfect.” She stated with a proud smile.

    Ashlyn leaned in for a kiss but she was interrupted by the shrill ringing of Ali’s phone. She jumped away from Ashlyn to ander it.


    “Ali! Ok, no small talk. Why did you ask me to call? Is it about Ashlyn? It better be about Ashlyn. It’s about Ashlyn isn’t it?”

    Ali looked over her phone and towards Ashlyn, telling her to come over to talk to Kyle with her. “Actually it is about Ashlyn. We have something that we want to tell you.”

    Just as Ali finished her sentence, Ashlyn sat down next to her. “But, no one knows yet. You’re the first so try and keep your big mouth shut.”

    Before either of them could say anything, Kyle squealed and started flailing around excitedly. “You guys are dating! I knew it. OMG, why did you guys wait so long to get together? Tell me everything. Ashlyn, what did you do for the first date? Who kissed who? Have you guys said ‘I love you yey?’”

    Ali and Ashlyn were both laughing as Kyle rambled off all of his questions. “Kyle slow down!”

    Ashlyn spoke up for the first time. Despite Kyles reaction, she was still nervous. “So you are ok with this?”

    Kyle suddenly got serious. “Ashlyn Harris. You are the most amazing human on the planet and there is no one in this world that I would rather see my sister with. She may not have said it to you yet, but you are her everything.” Kyle stopped and addressed Ali. “Sorry sis, I’m gonna have to embarrass you for a second.” Then he continued with Ashlyn. “She talks about you non stop, Ash. No one can make her smile the way you do. Everything about Ali has become happier, brighter somehow, since she’s known you. So to answer your question, I am absolutely ecstatic that you and my sister have finally found each other.”

    At some point during Kyle’s speech, Ali had wrapped her arm around Ashlyn’s arm and laid her head on her shoulder. Ashlyn had no clue what to say. She knew that Kyle loved her and supported her and Ali together, but hearing how happy he was for them made it all the more special.

    “Oh!” Kyle shouted. “You look super hot by the way.”

    Ashlyn galnced at Ali with a smirk on her face. “And you said that I needed to stop worrying about my outfit.”

    Kyle laughed and said, “Yeah, cmon sis. Your girlfriend cleaned up nice for the occasion. It’s like you didn’t even try.”

    Ali looked insulted. “If you guys are going to use this relationship to gang up on me, then I think we need to break up.”

    Ashlyn wrapped her arms around Ali’s neck and cuddled as close to her as humanly possible. “No don’t leave me! I’m sorry. I’ll never side with Kyle again.”

    They both knew that wasn’t true but it was still cute. Kyle, Ali and Ashlyn spent the next two hours telling Kyle all about how they got together. Kyle was so excited for them. He knew he had to keep his mouth shut until they decided that they were ready to tell other people. But he wanted nothing more than to shout from the rooftops that Ali Krieger and Ashlyn Harris had finally got a clue and admitted how they felt for each other.

    Ali and Ashlyn felt better knowing that they didn’t have to hide from Kyle anymore. They still had a lot more people to tell, but that was one name that they could check off the list.

More than just friends with benefits. A Bellamy Blake imagine

Word count:1220, Requested

“Bra.” Bellamy tells you before throwing you your favorite dark blue bra with lace detailing on the side. “Shirt.” You respond repeating his actions. You and Bellamy had just had.. a moment.. To say the least. It wasn’t unusual for you and him to sleep together. Actually you two slept together almost every night. He’d normally just knock on your door around 10 pm claiming he “needed” you.In other words, he was horny. And lets just say you helped him out. Then, when you were done, you’d both get dressed and he’d go back to his room. You’d never admit it to him, or even to yourself but, you had feeling for the dark haired boy. I mean, you two knew each other since you were kids. And best friends ever since. You didn’t want to ruin what you two had by telling him how you felt. But keeping it inside was really god-damn hard. You’d asked him a couple times to stay the night. He’d answer with “ Uh, I need to do something early tomorrow morning. Wouldn’t want to wake you up.” That was real fucking bullshit. Then the next day, you two would spent time together and act like nothing ever happened. And to be honest, it was killing you.

Time lapse

63 days. That’s how long you had been stuck in this freaking cell. You had been caught stealing medical supplies for your little brother. You were wondering how he was doing without you. Both your parents had died about 3 years ago. He didn’t have anyone else but you. And Bellamy? How was he doing? Did he find himself another best friend/ friend with benefit? I mean he wouldn’t have much trouble finding someone else to “fool around” with. He was so attractive. Everybody on the arc would be crazy not to be completely in love with him. And if that was true, you were perfectly sane.

Time lapse

You had been on earth for about 2 days and Bellamy was all ready acting like a player. Flirting with every piece of female meat on this camp. Expect you. Either he didn’t recognize you or didn’t want to but either way he hadn’t even sais a word to you. But, I guess you had changed from the last time you had saw him. Your hair had gotten a lot shorter. Approximately shoulder length. Bellamy had always said he loved your long H/C hair. But, you had became kinda friends with Murphy, I guess. Right now he was trying to show you how to throw a knife. It kept hitting the tree bark and tumbling to the ground. It was hard to concentrate when you kept looking over your shoulder to see if Bellamy was looking at you two. You wanted to make him as jealous as he was making you. But why would he be jealous to see you with someone else? It’s not like he had feelings for you or anything. Then it happened. Your E/C eyes met with his and fireworks went off inside your entire body. And then he looked down.

“Y/N how many times do I have to tell you? Your arm has to open up like this.” Murphy tells you, grabbing your right arm and practicing the correct motion with you a few times. “Try.” He says. You do and the knife stays right in the brown bark. You jump inside Murphy’s arms screaming “I did it! I did it!” “We did it.” That caused you to back off from the young boy a little. Murphy was nice and all but, he just wasn’t Bellamy. “ Wow Y/N that was impressive.” You hear someone’s voice say sarcastically behind you. Bellamy. Your heart skipped a beat. So he did remember you. “ Yeah, it was.” Murphy says taking your defence. Bellamy looks at him. “Anyways, I’ve got things to do. You know, with me being the leader of this camp or whatever.” He starts walking away but then turns around and says “ Oh and Y/N. I liked you a lot better when we were sleeping together.”  

What made him think he could speak to you like that? I mean less than 6 months ago you two were best friends. I guess people change. He changed. You were sitting around the hot fireplace. People all around you laughing and falling off their seats made out of wood logs. Most people were drunk. You would be too, later.When everyone would be asleep and you could enjoy the silence around you. Maybe you would cry, maybe you would think him over and over again. But, you didn’t have to be drunk to nail that. You had to sit there and watch Bellamy kiss that girl over and over again. You felt like puking. You decided to go away and come back later. When they’d both be inside his tent. As you passed beside Bellamy and his one night stand, you kick his drink, which spills all over her shoes. “Hey, Bitch, watch out!” “ Yeah watch out bitch.” Bellamy says looking you straight in the eyes. “Fuck you Bellamy.” “Oh really fuck me Y/N? I believe that was your job. Everyone listen up!” He screamed. “Y/N here, was screwing me on the arc. Every single day. She just can’t get enough! Boys, she’s all yours now!” He screams. Everybody raises their cups at Bellamy’s statement. Tears start running down your face. You start running towards the woods. Nobody even tries to stop you.

It had been 3 days. You were spending most of your time hunting and picking up berries and nuts wherever you could. You were carving your knife on a piece of rock when you heard a twig snap behind you. Turning around you scream “Who’s there!” Then you see 5 silhouettes coming from behind trees. Bellamy was one of them. “Bellamy? What the hell are you doing here.” You ask. “I came to get you. We all came.” He starts getting closer to you. “Y/N I am so sorry for what I said to you. To be honest the only reason why I said that is because, I love you. And I have for a long time. And it scares me. I’m so god damn scared Y/N. And I miss you. I miss touching you , I miss kissing you, I miss playing chess with you. I miss looking at you without you knowing and thinking of how lucky I am to even know you. And I know what I said at the camp was wrong. I’m sorry. And you need to know that.” “You done?” You ask. “I mean I gues-” You cut him off by crashing your lips on his. Your hands playing with his dark curls hair while his rest on you face and hip. “I’m completely and utterly in love with you Bellamy Blake.” “ How about we go back home babygirl?” He asks. “I already am”

Hey everyone! I wrote it earlier then expect! I hope you liked this Bellamy Blake one shot! If you did please heart and follow my blog! Requests are opened at the moment! So are ships, check out my blog for more awesome stuff

honestly one of my favorite things about citrus is that whenever mei learns something new about yuzu and her reasoning for why she acts and dresses how she does, she always tends to get this look on her face that’s a combination of concerned and a little bewildered

it’s like you can see the understanding written on her face, that she thought yuzu was just this carefree kid who just caused other people problems because of some ‘i do what i want when i want’ attitude, but then she realizes that yuzu also had a hard time growing up, but she doesn’t let it get to her and keeps smiling and putting other people before herself. yuzu never makes a big deal out of her own suffering, she doesn’t let it affect how she associates with others, unlike mei

and mei loves that part of yuzu, and she’s also envious of it, and only yuzu can make mei make this face that’s full of love and concern and awe for this person who has a quality she just doesn’t have

and there are actually a lot of things about citrus that sort of piss me off sometimes, but i fucking live for this look, and for those moments when mei truly realizes what a blessing it was for her to meet yuzu and how much she cares about yuzu’s wellbeing

Kids are dying. People her age were fighting for their lives…and there were cocktails and brightness and beautiful dresses. Camilla was miserable. Picasso had all but forced a Shirley temple into her hands, and she sipped at it miserably.She had a strict schedule and was only supposed to remain at the part for an hour and fifteen minutes. But it had only been five since she arrived. Camilla never had wanted more to be alone. As someone approached her, she took a big gulp of her fizzy drink. “I just don’t get it.” She said particially to herself. “And I’m not having any fun.”

     “As a kid I always understood that I was quiet, but it’s never been a burden. I never wished to change myself and I feel lucky that I never had that feeling. I didn’t always have the same interests as other kids, and I wasn’t interested in fitting in. I was used to my own company. 
     My mother raised me but she worked a lot, so after school I would go home, do my homework, and then go off into my own imagination, creating things. She was always supportive. Even as a kid, she would let me express myself and behave how I wanted. If I wanted to dress weird and go to school like that she would say, ‘Maybe they’ll beat you up but it’s your choice. You can go ahead.’”

Gang Imagine

Requested: @crybaby-lashton

Can you do a imagine with the whole gang where there’s a girl from New York and she’s shy and multiracial the socs come to bother her outside the dx and they help her

I had just moved to Tulsa and I was very nervous. It was hard in New York being multiracial, but in the south, being multiracial was even harder. It sucked in fact. I knew I would never be friends with anyone because no one would want me around. So, I barely talked to anyone and kept to myself. It was better this way…right?

I was outside the DX because I needed to fill up my car on gas. As I waited for my car to fill up, some well dressed kids came up to me. “Hey, where you are from?” they asked. “Uh, New York.” I said quietly. “New York, huh? Well you look like an alien. You don’t belong here or wherever the hell the other half of you is from!” another one said. I looked down and took their verbal blows. 

All of a sudden, some guys came out and chased them away with windshield wipers. “That should scare them off.” one said. “Two-Bit, they were just windshield wipers.” another said. “Yeah, but they don’t need to know that.” the first, Two-Bit?, said. “Hey, are you okay?” one said to me. He was only a couple inches taller than me, and I was not tall. He had bright blonde hair and icy eyes. I nodded nervously. “Sorry ‘bout that. I can talk to the owner if you want. He’s our boss.” one said and pointed to a very handsome boy next to him. “No, no. It’s fine.” I said quietly.  “Are you new here?” a very tall guy asked. I nodded, “Just moved here.” “Where are you from?” the one who said he worked here asked. “New York.” I said. “No way! That’s where I’m from! Where were you at?” the blonde one asked. “Brooklyn.” I responded. “I lived in the Bronx.” he said, “I’m Dally by the way.”

“I’m Y/N.” “Oh, yeah, I’m Steve and this is Soda.” the DX worker said and pointed to the handsome one. “I’m Darry.” the tall one said. “I’m Two-Bit Matthews.” he said. “I’m Ponyboy.” the one who was talking with Two-Bit earlier said. “And I’m Johnny.” the quiet one said. I gave him a smile. “Welcome to our gang!”

Why Didn’t You Tell Me? [Requested]

Hey! Look at me, I’m actually writing a request! Who’s proud of me? I’m proud of me. Okay, so I’m thinking about writing a fanfiction and there will be a preview to it, but the thing is, fanfictions have never been my best friend because I struggle to update and I can’t ever stick to an idea. We’ll see how it all plays out, but for now, enjoy this request, xx

Request:  Can you do an imagine where y/n. finds out that she cannot have kids and she doesn’t want to tell Justin but he finds out the rest is up to you


Y/N swung her feet, looking down at the hospital gown that they had dressed her in. She was waiting for the results, to see if she was fertile. It had been three months that Justin and Y/N had been trying for a baby and it had been three months that the pregnancy tests continued to say she wasn’t pregnant. She tried to hide her disappointment from Justin who would only say they would try harder, but there wasn’t much else they could do. She knew about that most women on her mother’s side were infertile, but she wanted to make sure from the doctors before she told Justin. Y/N scheduled an appointment without Justin’s knowledge and had come to find out the truth for herself.

Her eyes snapped up when the doctor walked in, holding test results in his hand. He smiled a smile, but she noticed that it didn’t quite meet his eyes. He sat down across from Y/N.

“There’s good news and bad news,” he said. “Which would you like to hear first?”

“The good news,” Y/N meekly muttered.

“Okay, so the good news is that you’re all healthy. Everything seems to be working well for you.”

“And the bad news?” Y/N already knew the bad news, but she wanted to hear it first.

He licked his lips and handed the lab results to Y/N, “you’re infertile. I’m sorry.”

He got up and left, leaving Y/N to her thoughts.


Y/N got home later that night. She drove around for a while, aimlessly and with no direction. She finally pulled into the driveway and got out, the results tucked away deep in her purse. She walked inside and smiled at her husband who was outstretched on the couch, watching a movie.

“There’s my beautiful wife,” he exclaimed and held his arms open for Y/N.

She giggled softly and dropped her purse on the coffee table, sitting down next to Justin. She curled up in his  arms and closed her eyes, a sudden pang of hurt going through her. Y/N felt her mood drop, even if she was in the arms of her favorite person ever. Her grip on Justin loosened and she turned away, watching the movie.

“Baby, what’s wrong?” Justin asked, looking over at his distressed wife.

Y/N shook her head and got up from the couch, “nothing.”

She walked upstairs, sighing and Justin watched her leave with his eyebrows furrowed. 


Y/N walked downstairs later to get a drink of water. She could hear the TV still playing as she walked down and she looked over at Justin who hung his head, the lab results thrown carelessly on the table. Y/N gasped and slowly walked over, sitting down next to Justin.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” He asked in a soft voice, looking over with sad eyes.

“I was worried of what you’d think about me not being able to give you kids. I wasn’t worried that your love for me would change,” she mumbled and looked off to the side.

“Oh baby,” Justin sighed and wrapped his arms around his wife, bringing her closer to his side. “My love for you could never change, you completely have my heart, and I don’t think I could ever love someone else. Now, as for the whole kid thing, we could adopt or get a surrogate mother. Anything that you want.”

Y/N smiled wide and hugged Justin, his arms wrapping around her waist. He pressed his lips against her forehead. Y/N is the luckiest woman alive.

Family day out || Madco

After a week of working on the restaurant, Madison thought that the family needed a day to relax and have fun. It took a lot of research for her to find a place that worked perfectly for toddlers and found the Brooklyn Children’s Museum. It was still cold out for them to go outside to play in the snow and she knew that Lily and Matteo were getting sick of being in the house all day long, so she wanted them to experience more things that the city had to offer. Dressing up the kids, she bundled them up in their coats and hats, slowly moving to grab her own coat and hat. It was in the teens and it was something that the kids has never experienced before. 

Turning her car on while in the house to start the heat, Madi looked around for Marco, smiling when she saw her husband. “I have a feeling the kids are going to love the museum. They have a little toddler area and now that Lily is walking, she can experience as much as Matteo can. Can you get Matteo and I’ll get Lily? The car is heating up now.” Scooping up her daughter, she went outside, holding Lily close to her to keep the cold air away from her as much as she could. Opening the door, she strapped Lily in her carseat, moving quickly to get into the driver’s seat. Her phone’s GPS already had the address and she smiled as Marco got in the seat beside her. “Ready? Hopefully we won’t get lost, but it’s apparently some unique building that you can’t miss.” Backing out of their parking spot, she started driving and turned the kids music on, hearing Lily try to mock Matteo as the boy tried to sing the songs.



Happy trans day of visibility, everyone!

I am Constantine, I live in Greece and I am 17y old. I grew up in a transphobic-homophobic country so from an early age I have been told that I was a male, and that I should act like one. I never understood gender roles. As a kid I liked playing with barbies with my sister or even dress up like a girl and do sketches with her and at the same time, I enjoyed drawing dragons and monsters.

My family didn’t actually have a problem with that ‘cause they thought Ι was going through a phase or smth. I remember my mum taking me to play-stores and I would pick my own barbie (although I could only have one) and generally helping me do anything I wanted (although she forbade me wearing makeup and anything too girly). I couldn’t tell my friends and I have been keeping it a secret since.

I have been rejecting my true feelings for so long because of bullying and fear, I have been suppressing interests and behaviours to fit the label of “male”, 'cause I thought I had no other choice, that even now, I can’t figure out what the heck I am (sexually and my gender).

For the time being, I identify as a demiboy but I am still searching to see if I feel more comfortable as something else. In the future I wish to have an androgynous appearance(no body hair, coloured nails, wearing makeup and that kind of stuff) but still pass for a guy. (I don’t wear makeup outside for now and my family doesn’t know about all this. They would only accept after long fights and I really don’t have the energy for that).

Demiboy | he/his | Happy tdov to all of you and I wish you find peace with yourselves soon

My teens and twenties were really challenging. TV and film wasn’t like it is now, where you could turn on the TV and there’s a reasonable expectation that you could see people that bore resemblance to me. So I had to dream in a vacuum. I was never, ever, ever skinny, and therefore never considered “pretty”, even though I loved clothes and makeup and dressing up. That was really hard in middle school and high school. I was always comforted by this strange little fire inside of me that when I got older things would not be like that. Some comfort, huh? It should be noted that I was a very focused, odd kid. I hope this was helpful! And I hope you get everything you want.

It had been several days since the incident with the sponsor and Castor’s fear of being jumped had dulled considerably. He wasn’t paranoid of turning a corner and finding a peacekeeper, though he knew Colt was still anxious and on edge. Cas had never liked attending balls as a kid, and he didn’t now but when he got dressed and slipped in, he found Colt in the crowd and breathed a little easier. He grabbed two drinks from a passing avox and siddled up beside his boyfriend with a grin. “Hello sir,” he said, smiling crinkling his eyes with delight. “I don’t usually do this and all but I just wanted to tell you that you are looking mighty fine in that suit tonight. Do you have a date?”


So, was it just my family who took gendering children from birth just a step further?

On my dad’s side, the oldest daughter was assigned pink as her color from birth.

The next oldest was assigned purple.

And the third oldest (there had never been a fourth oldest) got yellow.

Like, I was the baby of my particular family until my mom got remarried and had three kids starting when I was fifteen.

So I was assigned purple. All my coats were purple, my socks, most of my dresses, my shoes. I was purple.

My older sister was pink. All her coats, socks, etc.

Like, I understand it was probably easier than letting the kids pick out their clothes at the store. If both of them wanted the pink nightgown, you’d have to check the size on it before you got them dressed to make sure it wasn’t their sisters’.

But there had to be a better way than assigning your kid a color. Especially cuz it meant I didn’t get handmedowns from my sister and they went straight to Goodwill instead.