the door

Ok, so, Shaggy is at the grocery store, twerking in the frozen food aisle.

Which is not a sentence I wanted to ever have to type, but such is life.

Bad guy nabs Shaggy with shopping cart, Shaggy decides it must be Scooby, and shouts:

Shaggy: “SCOOOOOBY, STOOOOOOOP!”

Scooby runs ahead of him, slides out door…

…and is directly in front of Shaggy as Shag rolls along, seconds later sitting prominently behind a glass door.

Shaggy: “STOP, SCOOBYYYYY!”

Yup… Shaggy still managed to think it was Scooby pushing him, and failed to see him either time.

But that’s not the best part. Oh no.

The best part is how Scooby does a camera take, because even he can’t believe this that happened.

“…wait, really? Really?”

“C’mon folks, that’s so crazy, even the fourth wall can’t contain the nonsense.”

(I’m pretty new to D&D, and so are my players. The rogue, who also DMs, has a bad habit of taking over the game. Due to this, the adventure I had planned got totally scrapped. This was my revenge.)

(The storyline is that due to a racist wizard, the Rogue’s in game Bard boyfriend was cursed into a magic sleep. Also, they have an adopted baby gollem son named Dwayne. It’s all a very long story.)

Me: You approach the sorceress’ tower All you can see is a plain wooden door.

Rogue: I order Macedo (An Ent) to break the door.

Me: Macedo attempts to ram himself into the door. He bounces off, harmlessly.

Rogue: I bribe the door with gems I stole from (Bard)

Me: The door remains closed.

Rogue: I roll for perception. *rolls high*

Me: You touch the door, and suddenly think, “Where are my manners?” You realize that is the clue.

Rogue: “I left my manners with my boyfriend. Let me go get them.” I return to Macedo and grab Dwayne.

“Oh, most highly esteemed door, please accept my humble request to please release your lock and let me in, for my significant other is greatly afflicted with an enchanted sleep. Both me and my son beseech you, please let us in.”

I show the door my son.

Me: The door is not sentient. No affect.

(At this point, the Druid and Bard are just about crying with laughter, due to the fact I told them to way to open the door; knocking. Finally, the Druid approaches in-game, and helps out.)

Me: The Elven Stranger approaches. He had followed the Ent.

(Druid rolls perception and gets the same clue.)

Druid: Hmm. I glance at the person trying to open the door before shaking my head and firmly knocking on the door. It’s only polite after all.

Rogue: I roll to facepalm. *gets a nat-20*

(The table loses their minds)

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