the doctor is my spirit

On Thoughtforms

-Ciie from Ophidian by Rydre Dusks/Little Lu

I’ve been getting a lot of messages about what thoughtforms are as of late. These are, in short, some sort of sentient or non-sentient construct that has been created and given energy by its creator. Thoughtforms are your imaginary friends, your story characters, your comic art, your personas. These beings may not be classified as spirits or astral entities, but in a sense they are beings all the same.

What makes a thoughtform?

Artists, writers, children, everybody makes thoughtforms often without realizing it. When a person projects their thoughts, they are slowly forming an interesting being up there in the astral with all those traits. Thoughtforms can take on the appearance of anything in particular. I made thoughtforms a lot as a kid, but at the same time I also interacted with spirits on a regular basis. They are not weaker than spirits or entities, unless they are created that way. A great example would be one of my pride and joy thoughtforms Ciie. A concept of heinous experiments gone awry. Ciie is part human, part snake, but not in the sense that makes this hybrid appealing to the eye. Ciie was kidnapped and fused to a snake-like lower half, forced into this manner by several psychotic religious scientists intent on recreating the concept of their ophidian god.

Oh how cruel! I’m hearing you all say. You did this to him against his will and now he’s stuck like this?! You’re horrible!

Well, that leads into my next part I want to talk about. I didn’t realize, at the time that I made Ciie, that he would be a thoughtform. Ciie was originally the main protagonist of my book Ophidian. But what set Ciie apart from other characters of mine is that I put a lot of intent into him. I wanted to talk to him on a personal level. Ciie was my first accidental thoughtform during my writing years. It wasn’t until he spoke back to me one day that I realized what I had done. Ciie was then living, and in a tremendous amount of pain. I felt horrible. I wanted to change him again… back to being human or something much less cruel. But he refused.

“You created me, and you created my story. Finish the story so I can find some peace.”

So despite his harrowing appearance, Ciie wanted to stay the way he was. He and I didn’t talk much after that. He went through a lot of different feelings toward me, and really wasn’t sure how to feel in the end, but I slowly created him friends and family to comfort him and keep him safe while I wrote out his story. I created a world for him to inhabit. I created the antagonists so he could have battles against them and actually feel like he was getting somewhere. I did all of this as I wrote.

Ciie isn’t the only thoughtform in my family group whom I have close interactions with. I have many. Hyperstar–who is literally a galactic rainbow-puking alien with stars for ears, Jim–a friendly black and greenish headcrab from the Half-Life universe, P–a deep speaking, story-telling dragon who hails from the land of Skyrim, T–a multi-armed human ghost who flirts with me, and Dr. Roosevelt–an insane doctor from the 1800s who prefers bone saws and syringes over orthodox treatments.

-T, the multi-armed ghost

So how do you differentiate a thoughtform from a spirit?

This is actually an intriguing question that is a little difficult to answer. In some cases, you can’t. But if the thoughtfrm is yours, it’s much easier to tell. Thoughtforms tend to do exactly as you want them to. If ever you are face to face with an entity that you cannot differentiate, try using your mind to change their appearance. Imagine them with a beard if they are female, or imagine them sprouting wings, or something else bizarre or unlike them. If it happens without any repercussions, chances are you’ve got a thoughtform. If the being gets miffed at you for projecting your energies onto them, or they make some sort of reaction you were not expecting, it’s pretty easy to assume they are a spirit or astral entity.

“I don’t like thoughtforms. They just don’t exactly cut it for me.”

I read this a lot, and it honestly saddens me. Like I stated before, thoughtforms can be powerful, and in fact some of my closest friends are thoughtforms, and there is nothing wrong with that. I don’t know where I would be if I didn’t have my once-imaginary friends with me, whether or not they were created with purpose.

So tell me about servitors.

Okay, so servitors are a bit different. Servitors are thoughtforms, but they are thoughtforms created for a specific purpose. Some of them are created to be sexual with their companions, and some are created to fill their companions with happiness, like Hyperstar does for me. Others might be created to help boost memory, keep a designated area protected, or even eat up negative energies.

What about pop culture spirits?

This is just my UPG, so take it for what it’s worth. But pop culture spirits are, without a doubt, thoughtforms. Unless the creator comes forward and outright says, “This character is actually a spirit/entity I met,” chances are it’s a thoughtform who has gained popularity through TV shows, games, books, urban legends, creepypastas, etc. So yeah… If you believe in thoughtforms but don’t believe in pop culture spirits, you’re kinda missing some facts, in my opinion. Yes, there can be multiples of the same kind of pop culture spirit. I’ve met The Doctor in my dreams before. I’ve also met a Bonnie from FNAF, and have created a variation of Freddy Kruger for a client.

But whether or not your being you interact with on a daily or routine basis is a thoughtform really shouldn’t matter. As another opinion of mine, it’s perfectly fine to have imaginary friends. I’ve even had some thoughtforms perform poltergeist-like activity in our household in the past, so there is strength in intent.

So what’s the deal with Western Tulpas?

Now I’m still in the process of learning about the creation of Tulpas, so my views on them might be a little skewed. Western variations of Tulpas are also types of thoughtforms, but created in a unique fashion that sets them apart from said thoughtforms. Many Tulpas have the capacity to learn and grow like any regular being would, and many of them don’t even have a concept of their creation and firmly believe they are living beings. This is just what I have discovered, anyway. YOUR INTERPRETATION IS PROBABLY DIFFERENT SO DON’T HARP ON ME.

There’re a lot of details I’m probably missing, but like I said, I’m not as familiar with the concept of Tulpas as I am with thoughtforms in general. I know there are some people who actually use those two words interchangeably, so it might all just be a matter of opinion in the end.

This is Zenith. He is a ball-jointed doll (Originally a Little Kliff from Little Monica) that I turned into my magick vessel for a very real and very powerful divining thoughtform. In some groups you might call a doll like this a magick child. In others it is a Tulpa’s vessel. Zenith’s sentience was created as a protective ward, a divination enhancer, and a fronter for my personality. Not only does he have the ability to leave his vessel whenever he wishes, he also has the ability to communicate with my friends and family whenever he wants.

And yes… he sees through a lot of bullshit I may not catch. He’s also moved on his own a couple times, so I like to tell people to be careful around him. ;) But he’s my little buddy, and we are practically inseparable.

There’s my bit on thoughtforms. I’m hoping my post will clear up any questions others might have about my views on what I believe they are. I have a lot of respect for people who devote time and energy into making best friends for themselves, and I know my thoughtform friends are all very content to exist.

anonymous asked:

Oh my gosh you are a fairy doctor? I have so many questions!! When did this all start? How did you learn it? Where did you learn? What exactly do you do?

I started down the fairy doctoring path a few years ago? I believe I either ran into it while reading through sacred-texts, or someone told me. 

But, I researched more into it from folklore and texts about Biddy Early. I dream about one day learning from RJ Stewart, but for now it is mostly self study with the occasional “lesson” from a teacher. 

Its been a mix of studying from what texts I can, and studying from the spirits. 

You can check out this: Fairy Doctor information

and my stuff here 

A Fairy doctor- is someone that has within them the ability to communicate with the fairy folk.  People would often enlist the help of a fairy doctor when they suspected they were having difficulties with their Good Neighbors.  The fairy doctor would tell them how to appease the fairies,”-X 

I work with the fair folk on a very deep level and seek to assist in any matters pertaining to them. It involves a lot of charms, making talismans and amulets, and just listening. 

I’m currently in a big period of learning and developing, so I haven’t offered much services in that regard. I hope to do more in the future. 

what i love about you is your ability to leave, angry because we’ve had a little fight about somethin, and still — at the door — turn back to me and say i love you, i’ll see you later. i never realized i never learned, never ever along the line, that you could fight with someone and still love each other at the end of the day. that you could have little hiccups and piss each other off now and then but still want to kiss each other tender on the eyelids when it comes down to it. 

i’ve been so afraid of the fact that my appa is moving to korea with the two kids—so wracked with the same feeling i remember when i was a baby, and then again when i was fourteen & the woman who raised me had to leave for japan—wracked with that same feeling of leavings and leavings and leavings. for weeks i have grown insular, tried to cut myself off from my love and other people in my life. i didn’t even realize i was doing it, just felt myself floating up and up and up. had to spend time each day hitting my legs hitting myself on the arms hitting hitting the parts of my body that were threatening to leave. my spirit afraid.

today my doctor told me something, which i keep forgetting already, though it has only been a few hours. she said that somewhere along the line, i must have learned that it was easier to not voice my needs than to face the uncertainty that comes with voicing it. that somewhere along the line (and i know it and she does too) i learned deep deep in my body that if i voiced a need then i would be abandoned. and so i have learned to become recklessly, deeply independent. and it has made it hard to love. to be loved. to fall into that deep and wild and steady place. 

she said, you are loved shinji. and so many people have told me that throughout my time. they have touched me or un-touched me or looked at me and said, with their eyes steady, you are loved. even if it doesn’t feel like it, you are loved. and i have never felt truly that way, or have felt so weird around that, or wanted to run the second any of it felt like anything. and this time around i really wanna stay. i really love this person, in a staying way. in a, we got plans way. in a way that i never felt with anybody before. 

that’s a scary thing, and that’s been driving me up the fucking wall for months now. every urge in my body every trained defense mechanism that my body knows is ding-ding-ding telling me that it’s time to run. to destroy. to sabotage. to distance myself so intensely that i can’t get close to them, and risk the bigger loss of abandonment, again. but i want to do the brave thing. i want to move endlessly into the brave, brave thing of loving. 

Any other Twelve/Rose shippers out there?

Oookay so I sort of lost track with Doctor Who ages ago in season 6 - I just could never get away with Moffatt’s story arcs - and I’ve only recently started watching Capaldi’s era. I’m midway through through S8 and aiming to get caught up before this series finishes.

First off, I completely adore Capaldi!Doctor. He’s my spirit animal. Second of all, as a diehard Rose Tyler/Doctor shipper I should’ve known the same would go for Twelve and Rose, especially after I had read “Tucker and Rose”.

Seriously, if you haven’t read that fic, here’s the link. You’re welcome.

Anyways, I’m on the lookout for some good Twelve/Rose fics, ideally long multi-chaptered fics. I’ve read a few oneshots but except for “T&R” and “Stuck with You”, both of which are more Rose/Malcolm Tucker stories. So if any kind fellow Twelve/Rose shipper could help me out?

Ta x


Red Doe Plantation (built 1830′s, yes, I know it says 1846 on the historical marker, but building of the home more than likely started in the 1830′s) is for sale and my heart breaks that I don’t have the money to buy it and fix it up. It needs sooo much work done to it after sitting abandoned for at least a decade. I spent soo much time at this place trying to help keep it up years ago. My blood, sweat, and tears is in this house, and now it’s fate is unknown.

Also, this place is majorly haunted, mostly by friendly spirits, but there is one evil spirit there, who we called “The Doctor.” My personal favorite spirit there is who we called “Old Hoss” because he would get frisky with me and slap me on the ass a lot, lol. Y’all think I’m joking but I’m not. Being slapped hard on the ass when no one is around is a freaky, but funny thing! He also liked to pull my hair gently. The sweet lady spirit who is there is LouElla. She is the victim of the evil doctor who allowed her to bleed to death in a room on the first floor, then murdered her new born. There’s also a little girl there named Violet who died at the turn of the 20th century of scarlet fever, but she also has a spirit attached to her who is an old black man, a former slave on the plantation. He watches over her. I’ve seen him a few times. There are many other spirits on the grounds of the plantation, but those are just the known ones that are attached to the house. There is a small cabin from the 1850′s on the property that has a scary spirit there, too. But I stayed away from there after I saw the hunched over black shadow of a woman that scared the shit out of me.

If anyone would to donate $150,000 to me so I can buy this house and save it, I would gladly appreciate it, lol. I just pray it goes into good hands and it’s not torn down when it sells because of how bad of the condition it’s in.

Spirit Guide

Here are a list of some of my spirit family. These spirits are the ones who are okay with talking to other people, answering questions, and interacting in general. Feel free to ask any of them questions; just send me an ask and make sure to let me know who the question is going to! This list will be updated when needed!

• Ayrus – they/them – my guardian angel
• Doctor – he/him – angel
• V – he/him – pixie (one of my first spirit companions; R’s twin brother) from @faeryofblackstone
• R – she/her – pixie (one of my first spirit companions; V’s twin sister) from @faeryofblackstone
• Ria – she/her – Sugar Gloss angel from @magickalmenagerie
• Hunter – he/him – elf/dragon hybrid (mate)
• Sunflower – she/her – faun from @thedragonslibrary
• Lover – he/him – doppleganger (mate)
• A – he/him – angel (mate)
• Trouble – he/him – soul shard (mate)