the disaster signing


I imagine death so much it feels more like a memory,
Is this where it gets me? In space, 60000 feet above the Earth…

Modern AU featuring TJeffs as local human disaster, Jmads as #givemeabreak2k17 and A.Ham as your obedient gremlin

[Someone actually did this]

Can the Zodiac Signs Cook?

No, they fail at making their own food or decide to make ‘minor changes’ to other recipes and ruin everything: Gemini, Leo

No, they make small mistakes that badly affect the recipe: Virgo, Libra, Scorpio

Yes, but only using someone else’s recipe: Aries, Capricorn, Pisces

Yes, and they can make their own recipes: Taurus, Cancer, Sagittarius, Aquarius

the signs as shit my friends say
  • aries: fuck you, i'm NOT hangry!!!
  • taurus: if this is about your relationship status, i'm going to need another bottle of wine
  • gemini: if you're half jewish, does that mean i can be half gay?
  • cancer: a zebra. two zebras. dos zebros!
  • leo: someone save me, i'm about to get bareback fucked by this exam
  • virgo: i put a funnel in the cheerios thing and now it's starting to look more like a tree!!
  • sagittarius: another day, another soprano screaming off-key in the practice room next to mine
  • libra: oh, no, he's great, he just does a lot of coke
  • scorpio: i'm putting my name down as "olive ostrovsky has daddy issues"
  • capricorn: the gordon ramsay version of "yes daddy" is "yes chef"
  • aquarius: i'm passionate about two things: recycling and REVENGE
  • pisces: you're a syrupy disaster!!

i remember once when i was 18 a super beautiful girl i worked with gave me her number and asked to go out sometime and she ended up picking me up one night to go stargazing. at the beach. on a blanket with a little picnic. and i did not know i was on a date until halfway through when she very blatantly told me she was attracted to me

  • Aries: Influence - Love myself tonight and I think you can feel the same
  • Taurus: Don't Talk About It - The world is beautiful / so why don't you feel anything?
  • Gemini: True Disaster - Keep playing my heartstrings faster and faster / you can be just what I want, my true disaster
  • Cancer: Imaginary Friend - Got my arm around with superglue / come power through
  • Leo: WTF Love Is - I know that I'm a handful / but you get me, know what you signed up for
  • Virgo: Flashes - People come / I push them away
  • Libra: Vibes - Flickering, our eyes go wide / you giving me studded sight / painting stars / in our hearts
  • Scorpio: Keep it Simple - Let me keep it simple / so I don't have to face ya
  • Sagittarius: Cool Girl - No, let's not put a label on it / let's keep it fun
  • Capricorn: Don't Talk About It - Don't talk about it / sweep it under the rug like we do
  • Aquarius: Lady Wood - Looking like the freak card kind
  • Pisces: Vibes - Whisper pretty little things / heart sings, I feel 'em, ooh / dreamer, tripping on your highs / feelin' all the vibes

Am I the only one that feels that all these weather disasters and catastrophes with the hurricanes and earthquakes are signs from God?? All of this starts happening right after the “great American eclipse” this just can’t be a coincidence. All this stuff seems to be happening as it was part of a design. Mexico city looks like something straight out of an apocalypse doesn’t look real.

Now with this major celestial event happening on Sept 23rd, that perfectly lined up with Revelations 12..I can’t help but to feel a very uneasy something extremely dark is going to happen. Keep in mind that this event NEVER took place before in history. It’s a clear sign that we are living in the end of days. People need to open their eyes to the world around them..too many distractions going on. When something major does happen, nobody will be prepared for it.

  • Aries: Sandstorm
  • Taurus: Earthquake
  • Gemini: Blizzard
  • Cancer: Tsunami
  • Leo: Wildfire
  • Virgo: Landslide
  • Libra: Sinkhole
  • Scorpio: Cyclone
  • Sagittarius: Volcano
  • Capricorn: Avalanche
  • Aquarius: Tornado
  • Pisces: Hurricane

whatever’s coming up in terms of free! media, i just really, really, really, really want to see sousuke smile and hear him laugh. enough with the broody, angry guy kyoani couldn’t get enough of in ES, i want him to be happy. simple as that.

Currently in that Hurricane Mood so here’s some hurricane cc ideas I guess

-max is just,, he’s ready for death at this point and embraces the sweet destruction that hurricane shall bring

-hes lowkey scared though because he doesn’t like storms


-he is scared though too because,, hoo boy,, that’s,, fast wind..

-he didn’t think it’d be this bad,,

-so he and max end up cuddling up under a ton of blankets together because they’re scared and they feel braver with the other there with them

-daniel starts spouting off Bible verses and frantically praying untill David finds him and hugs him and tells him it’ll be ok

-its just hard for Daniel because back in the cult any natural disasters were taken as signs that the gods were angry, and that he’d done something wrong

-hes not in the cult anymore, but sometimes old habits slip him up and he does something wrong

-david isn’t scared of storms, he was around them lots when he was a kid. He assures Daniel that everything’s gonna be fine

-gwen is staying over at a friend’s on a day off, but she’s still kind of worried for the campers and texts Daniel reminding him and David to check up on them every once in a while

The Signs as Natural Disasters
  • Aries: Forest Fire
  • Taurus: Earthquake
  • Gemini: Tornado
  • Cancer: Flood
  • Leo: Lightning Storm
  • Virgo: Sink Hole
  • Libra: Hurricane
  • Scorpio: Hail Storm
  • Sagittarius: Volcano
  • Capricorn: Meteor Shower
  • Aquarius: Black Hole
  • Pisces: Tsunami
Civil War? Did you mean: Stressed Out Father Tony Stark

“Steve I’m trying to get you out of your last disaster would you SIT STILL FOR FIVE SECONDS?!”

“Vision keep an eye on Wanda and don’t let her get into any more trouble until I’m back!”

“Why is this kitchen a mess? I didn’t raise you like this!”

“No, Steve and Sam, you two can’t fight the entire UN on your own!”

“Natasha please talk to the children they don’t listen to me anymore!”

“Clint, what the hell! You’re an actual dad. You’re supposed to be doing the responsible thing here!”

“Yes, Wanda, I locked you in your room for your own safety but only because I love you and you’re literally not a US citizen who just created a major disaster abroad??”

“Steve, please sign this so the Fresh Prince of Wakanda stops trying to kill your friend…”

“Who brought the giant plane destroying man?! This is exactly the kind of dangerous shit I’ve been warning you about!”

“Peter stay out of harms way! Wear protective gear! Keep your distance! Stand down!”

“Let go of my Rhodey!”

“Natasha you’re not helping, dammit!”

“All of you sit in silence and think of what you did while I convince Ross not to expel you!”

zodiac couples x natural disasters

earth sign + earth sign = earthquake: cracking but together

water sign + water sign = sea storm: swelling with passion

fire sign + fire sign = volcano:
bubbling with energy

air sign + air sign = sand storm:
blinded by love

earth sign + water sign = tsunami:
taking over everything

water sign + fire sign = lightning storm:
powerful yet fascinating

fire sign + air sign = drought:
begging for more

air sign + earth sign = tornado:
enticing but extreme

earth sign + fire sign = wildfire:
endless and exciting

water sign + air sign = hurricane:
unstoppable yet intense


@buyreputationbytaylorswift requested:Female!reader ask MJ to the prom with the help of peter and ned

Pairing: Michelle Jones x Fem!Reader

Warnings: None

Word Count: 1, 818

Summary: Asking Michelle to prom is not as easy as you thought it would be…

Tags: @coltcas


A/N: This is long overdue I’m sorry it took so long for me to complete this request but I think I’m finally getting over my writer’s block so I hope you enjoy this!

Originally posted by when-im-alonee-with-youu

You’re not quite sure what you’d call your relationship with a certain mysterious, intellectual loner- who was ironically enough, one of your closest friends. Nothing was ever made official between the two of you, but it had certainly crossed over the platonic line. Everything always happened behind closed doors with you and Michelle.

You’ve wanted to ask her to be your girlfriend for so long now, but you also didn’t want to ruin what you had by freaking her out. What you had now was good and you told yourself that knowing her, even if you were official, not much would change since she probably isn’t a huge fan of PDA, but you’re okay with that because neither are you. However, you couldn’t continue lying to yourself and minimizing how strong your feelings for her had become; you’re ready to take the next step and if she’s not on the same page now, how were you guys going to remain friends at the very least, past graduation?

You don’t want to force her into any commitments she’s not ready for, so you think there’s no harm in asking her to prom as the first step. Brainstorming for ideas, you research promposal videos online for inspiration, while keeping in mind what would be best suited for Michelle. She probably wouldn’t want something too public or in-your-face, but you feel like she would secretly appreciate a grand gesture of some sort.

You’ve got it! You’ve a got a plan and you can hardly wait till the next day to ask her.

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Plot Holes

by reddit user omegaokami

The day I found my first hole was the day my best friend came back from the dead.

We were in high school and stupid. Jake was his name and we liked to go out to this old abandoned house in the woods after school to just…screw around. Do stupid teenage things. It was a pretty big place to be honest. Two story house with a basement or three stories if you counted the small attic above it. The story is supposed to go that an old woman was building the house years and years ago in order to get away from the city life but, for some reason, never finished it. Probably died. Anyway, the house was pretty close to completion when she stopped but nobody bothered to finish it and now it just sits there rotting away.

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