the deep end of the 'pool

GEMINI: It’s really easy for people to criticize the choices you’ve been forced to make when they’ve never worn shoes as tattered as yours. The ground never seems rocky to anyone until they’ve personally experienced its brutality, and you’ve been braving the blood and the bruises for years without complaint. It’s okay to feel proud of yourself, for that. It’s okay to acknowledge the things that have made you who you are, even if those things haven’t always been beautiful or easy to talk about. Everything’s easier to appraise once it’s been given a voice.

CANCER: Stop convincing yourself that you don’t deserve the treasure chests that keep arriving on your doorstep. You’ve spent so long attempting to find the reason in your misfortune that you’ve incorrectly deduced that the only commonality between every pitfall is yourself. But you haven’t been factoring in how cruel the universe is, how angry it gets whenever something with a warm heart tries to touch what’s frozen. You’re finding all of this gold and compassion because it’s finally time for you to get what you’ve been giving to others. Take it.

LEO: You know, more so than anybody else, that it’s time to let go of the things that have hurt you, but there’s no easy way to say that you don’t know how to get rid of people that you’ve held so close to your chest. And maybe this says something about how much you try to give to others, all of the parts of yourself you’ve sacrificed for the comfort of soon-to-be-strangers. But the thing about leeches is that they drain you more often than they rid you of disease, especially in this season. And maybe this isn’t a leech yet, but it could become one, with time. Don’t let it.

VIRGO: It’s easy for you to ignore how much people truly care for you when you don’t feel as though you deserve it. The difficulty with this arises whenever you need help, as you’ve never learned how to ask for anything. So you let yourself feel distant from open palms and words of encouragement because you know you can do this yourself. While that’s true, you’re more than strong enough to conquer what’s been eating at you, it’s also true that the love that keeps getting shoved under your door is yours for the taking. It’s okay to pick it up. It’s okay to save it.

LIBRA: You’ve been peering out the window, comparing your reflection to everybody that passes by, and you seem to be forgetting that there’s a mirror right behind you. The only person that you need to measure yourself against is the person you were yesterday. I know it’s frustrating that progress too often moves like honey, and it’s impossible to see growth when you’re always with the thing that’s growing, but slow-motion is still motion. You may not be the person you want to be right now, but you will be. So turn around. Say hello to them.

SCORPIO: You were born with a shovel in your hand and you’ve been spending every moment since then dredging up the past. This is another way of saying that you have a lot of corpses buried in your backyard and despite the passage of time you’re afraid that they’re going to get up and walk away. Maybe come back as ghosts and haunt you, a reminder of what you’ve had to leave behind. But just because you’ve always had the tools to create self-doubt, it doesn’t mean you have to keep them on you at all times. It’s never too late to invest in a toolshed or try out gardening.

SAGITTARIUS: Have you found what you’ve been searching for, yet? Or, maybe a better question is “do you know what you’re looking for?” Because you’ve become an expert at donating your energy to a cause, any cause at all, and I’m starting to wonder if it’s all a distraction. If you’re struggling in the deep end and aren’t comfortable saying so. If you’re calling yourself a lifeguard because every atom of you is begging to be pulled out of the water. Baby, you’re so much more than a body that tries its best to save people. You’re worth more than what you’ve dragged out of the pool.

CAPRICORN: So many people that you care about have been falling into bad luck recently and it makes you feel so powerless. It’s as though you’re a minor character in your own life and you have to just sit back and watch the protagonist fuck things up in order to learn a lesson, or something like that. And I’m not going to lie and say that you’re able to have full control over every aspect of your life, because you never will. But remember that, despite all of this, every little thing you do to combat the world’s anger is a brave sort of rebellion. You are more than enough to the people you love.

AQUARIUS: There are a lot of people that you regret letting into your life and the memory of what you thought they’d be is making it hard for you to get out of bed. It’s okay to be sad, your feelings have only ever known the taste of validity, but know that nobody has the ability to ruin you. Someday they’re all going to regret setting fire to your bark when they realize how miraculous your leaves are in the summer heat, dancing in the breeze of late-night drives with people that want to keep you safe. Repeat after me: I am not damaged. I am not damaged. I am not damaged.

PISCES: I know that it’s hard to put faith in the moments of happiness you’ve been experiencing lately when so much of your life has been spent checking the clock and turning down the music, but you are not an airport or a train station. You’re a destination. And I know that you’re still getting used to the idea of being the subject of a travel brochure and that’s okay. It takes time to become comfortable with anything, even the good. Especially the good. The June air is buzzing and this is your time to shine. Don’t waste it.

ARIES: So, some eras of your life have been ending recently and that’s a little scary. Especially since you worked so hard to get what you’re holding. But they’re just making way for better adventures and happier moments and the only thing left for you to do is embrace that. Welcome change with open arms and it’ll be kind to you. I know there’s a voice in the back of your head saying “what if it all gets bad again” but you need to ignore that voice because it isn’t you. You are the person that’s endured and withstood and kept going. You’re the one that matters, here.

TAURUS: It’s been becoming more and more clear to you that out of all the people you’ve met and interacted with, there are very few you’d consider to be a “friend.” And I know that sometimes it feels like that’s all you’re ever going to get, but it isn’t. One’s hometown is, thankfully, never representative of the world in its entirety and there’s still so much you have left to see. Still so many souls that you’ll discover in the most mundane of places. You just have to keep your eyes open. I know it’s easier to sleep through the sadness, but you’re stronger than that urge, aren’t you? You are.
Pool Rules
  1. Do not swim alone.
  2. Do not open your eyes underwater. Some things are best left unseen.
  3. Do not swim down to the bottom of the pool. Do not touch the bottom of the pool. Stay away from the bottom of the pool. There are things down there that still remember what it was like to be alive.
  4. There are no lifeguards on duty. If you see a lifeguard, exit the pool area immediately.
  5. Sometimes the pool water will be different colors. This is normal. Continue to swim.
  6. You will see bubbles rise from the deep end of the pool. You will hear water splashing. Do not try to find the source. Stay in the shallow end of the pool.
  7. Do not enter the pool at high tide. Do not enter the pool at low tide. Only use the pool in between high and low tide.
  8. If you find something floating in the pool, do not touch it. Allow it to float on.
  9. Do not be alarmed if you feel something swim past you. This is normal.
  10. Do not drink the pool water.
Things You Need to Know About the Outgoing Introvert

1. When we see you after a long day, we might be all irritable and not want to talk

It has nothing to do with you. Outgoing introverts, though still introverts at their core, often need to recharge after a large use of social energy. After a long day of dealing with people, our social batteries are drained and we need to unwind and recover, usually alone.

2. We’re charming creatures and can be the life of the party, but…

You’ll be surprised how much we actually live in our heads. People often confuse us for extroverts, but we’re too introspective and over-think too much to be one.

3. If we like you, we really like you.

We don’t waste our time with people we’re not completely crazy about. If we agreed to go on a date with you, we like you. Take it as a huge compliment.

4. We have times when we’re weird with our phones.

Some days we can talk for hours, but sometimes we’re not so good at replying and talking on the phone. Don’t take it personally - we screen our phone calls, even from our closest friends. Outgoing introverts sometimes hate the phone because it’s all, like, intrusive and tears our minds away from whatever we’re deeply focusing on (and we are always deeply focusing on something). Our mind doesn’t change direction easily. Listening to one thing and seeing something else is a lot of sensory input piled on top of everything that’s already going on in our heads.

5. But don’t worry, in person we’ll listen to you for hours.

We have spectrums of introversion, so we’re good listeners. We’ll always be naturally in tune with how you’re feeling, so we’ll be able to see through any front you put up and make you jump into the deep end.

6. We need to dip our foot in the pool first.

We need time to warm up, so, like, chill. We tend not to outwardly express our feelings and spill our whole life story in the first hour of meeting you. Or the first year.

7. Our energy level depends on our environment.

Yes, we can get annoyed easily. If we vibe with the crowd, we can get our energy from human interactions. But if we don’t, we’ll start to get really introspective and reflective, and tend to withdraw into ourselves. It’s kinda like a hit or miss. We’re very selectively social. But it’s not because we dislike people - it’s actually the opposite. We dislike the barriers like small talk (which often comes with going out) creates between people, and try to avoid it at all costs.


8. You’ll think we are flirty with everyone.

Okay here’s the thing, when we inevitably have to interact with people, we make it seem like there’s nothing in the world we’d rather be doing. It’s ‘cause we’re, like, overly sensitive and so we go out of our way to make other people feel comfortable and happy. We’re intuitive and outgoing at the same time.

Research has found that introverts pay more attention to detail and exhibit increased brain activity when processing visual information. A study shows that the brain of an introvert weighs internal cues more strongly than external motivational and reward cues.

Aries: Told You So

I know you like
When I admit that I was wrong and you were right
At least I try
To keep my cool when I’m thrown into a fire
And they go

I hate to say I told you so
But they love to say they told me so
I hate to say I told you so
They love to say they told me

Taurus: Hard Times

All that I want
Is to wake up fine
Tell me that I’m alright
That I ain’t gonna die
All that I want
Is a hole in the ground
You can tell me when it’s alright
For me to come out

Hard times
Gonna make you wonder why you even try
Hard times
Gonna take you down and laugh when you cry
These lives
And I still don’t know how I even survive
Hard times

Gemini: 26

Hold onto hope if you got it
Don’t let it go for nobody
They say that dreaming is free
I wouldn’t care what it cost me

Reality will break your heart
Survival will not be the hardest part
It’s keeping all your hopes alive
All the rest of you has died
So let it break your heart

Cancer: Pool

I’m underwater
With no air in my lungs
My eyes are open
I’m done giving up
You are the wave
I could never tame
If I survive
I’ll dive back in

As if the first blood didn’t thrill enough
I went further out to see what else was left of us
Never found the deep end of our little ocean
Drain the fantasy of you
Headfirst into shallow pools

Leo: Idle Worship

Oh, it’s such a long and awful lonely fall
Down from this pedestal that you keep putting me on
What if I fall on my face?
What if I make a mistake?
If it’s okay a little grace would be appreciated
Remember how we used to like ourselves?
What little light that’s left, we need to keep it sacred
I know that you’re afraid to let all the dark escape ya
But we could let the light illuminate these hopeless places

Just let me let you down

Hey, baby I’m not your superhuman
And if that’s what you want
I hate to let you down
I got your hopes up
Now I got you hoping
But I’m gonna be the one that let you down

Virgo: Forgiveness

Don’t you go and get it twisted
Forgiving is not forgetting
Don’t you go and get it twisted
Forgiving is not forgetting
No, it’s not forgetting
No, I’ll never forget it, no

And you, you want forgiveness
(I can barely hang on to myself)
But I, I can’t give you that
(I can’t give you, I can’t give you that)
And you, you want forgiveness
(I’m afraid that I’ll have nothing left)
But I, I just can’t do it yet
(I can’t do, I just can’t do it yet)

Libra: Fake Happy

And if I go out tonight, dress up my fears
You think I’ll look alright with these mascara tears?
See I’m gonna draw my lipstick wider than my mouth
And if the lights are low they’ll never see me frown

If I smile with my teeth
Bet you believe me
If I smile with my teeth
I think I believe me

Oh please don’t ask me how I’ve been
Don’t make me play pretend
Oh no, oh oh what’s the use?
Oh please, I bet everybody here is fake happy too

Scorpio: Grudges

Time is a bastard I won’t break my neck to get around it
But aren’t we so brave to give up a fight
And let the years go by without us
‘Cause now I feel you by my side
And I don’t even care if it’s been a while
I can feel that we’ve changed and we’re better this way

Stop asking why
Why we had to waste so much time
Well, we just pick up, pick up and start again
'Cause we can’t keep holding on to grudges

Sagittarius: No Friend

Another thorny field to scatter fruitless seed,
Another song that runs too long god knows no one needs
More misguided ghosts, more transparent hands
To drop a nickel in our basket and we’ll do our riot!

Dance beneath another burning sky,
Behind our painted lips
In scores of catatonic smile-covered ankle-bitten ships
So throw your pedestal of stone in the forgetful sea
As protection from the paper-thin perfection
You project on me

Capricorn: Tell Me How

Think I’m tired of getting over it
Just starting something new again
I’m getting sick of the beginnings
And always coming to your defences
I guess it’s good to get it off my chest
I guess I can’t believe I haven’t yet
You know I got my own convictions
And they’re stronger than any addiction
But no one’s winning
[…]
You keep me up with your silence
Take me down with your quiet
Of all the weapons you fight with
Your silence is the most violent

Aquarius: Caught in the Middle

I can’t think of getting old
It only makes me want to die
And I can’t think of who I was
'Cause it just makes me want to cry, cry, cry
Can’t look back, can’t look too far ahead
I got the point, I got the message
[…]
I was dreaming life away
All the while just going blind
Can’t see the forest for the trees
Behind the lids of my own eyes
Nostalgia’s cool, but it won’t help me now
A dream is good, if you don’t wear it out
[…]
No, I don’t need no help
I can sabotage me by myself

Pisces: Rose-Colored Boy

Just let me cry a little bit longer
I ain’t gon’ smile if I don’t want to
Hey, man, we all can’t be like you
I wish we were all rose-colored too
My rose-colored boy

Leave me here a little bit longer
I think I wanna stay in the car
I don’t want anybody seeing me cry now
You say “We gotta look on the bright side”
I say “Well maybe if you wanna go blind”
You say my eyes are getting too dark now
But boy, you ain’t ever seen my mind

Your Ascendant: Expression in Poetry

Felt like I should be writing today, partly because I was inspired and because it’s cathartic. Hope you all enjoy! 

Aries AC:   

a million and one sunsets cannot match the beauty of your smile // red lipstick smears on your coffee cup // and he says “care to come home with me?”

Taurus AC: 

sitting by the fireside with your oversized sweater, tired eyes // flawless without even having to try // please don’t break my heart tonight.

Gemini AC:

whispers turn into giggles, giggles into laughter // acting strange for strangers // drunk on the moonlight and maybe a beer.

Cancer AC:

you’re diving into the deep end, yet again // the craters in the crescent moon start to look like swimming pools // but dear, there are no ladders up in space.

Leo AC:

a conversation with the mirror turns into dancing in your lingerie // whiskey on the breath & a french manicure // that hair flip says: “don’t tempt me with a good time.” 

Virgo AC:

perfection leads to madness, but isn’t madness genius? // that’s what they call you, glasses and all // with a heart made of crystal that’s chipped from the world’s fist.

Libra AC:

lollipops and gumdrops, cough syrup in your cup // sickly sweet like strawberry taffy, drink it up // make a funny face and wish the next girl good luck.

Scorpio AC:

smoking outside of the city lines // the sky is red and you feel so alive // you don’t need a lighter, your penetrating gaze is the flame.

Sagittarius AC:

you’ll be the first to fly, so tell me what it’s like // riding on an elephant’s back, kissing another stranger goodnight // in the back of his car, another anatomy lesson.

Capricorn AC:

throw another pebble into the ocean and it splashes like a stone // you put on a brave face so nobody knows // won’t you stop eating yourself alive?

Aquarius AC:

your mind is like a never-ending movie, so don’t wait for those credits to roll // lucy told me that you two have met, you’re one in the same // her watercolor pictures wouldn’t let you catch your breath. 

Pisces AC:

step into the flowerchild’s garden or better yet, let’s step into her head // licorice dreams melt into cotton candy scenes // use a seashell as a cellphone & hear her voice.

-Admin L

5

It’s a monumental week for African penguins at the San Diego Zoo. Animal care staff began the birds’ gradual introduction to their new Cape Fynbos habitat in the soon-to-open Conrad Prebys Africa Rocks. After initial introductions, the curious colony explored the cobble beach, plodded into the pool and swam throughout the deep end, surveying their expansive underwater world. Get the scoop on Zoonooz: http://bit.ly/ARPenguins17

I’ve been thinking a lot about the meeting between Trump and Obama at the White House, and here’s the thing.

Obama used to be a law professor. This is key.

Law school is so, so different from college. 

In college, everyone expects there to be a “syllabus day,” kind of a grace period where they can show up and get the lay of the land, figure out the bare minimum that they can get away with, the TA gives everyone their office hours, there’s an introductory lecture, and everybody leaves a few minutes early to go take a nap or something. You do the bullshit assignments, you say something in class now and then to get your participation check mark, and figure out how badly you can do on the final and still pass. 

But see, in law school, all the methodologies you’ve spent the last 17 years operating under go out the window. Day one of law school is you being thrown into the deep end of the pool—you’ve had a homework assignment for two weeks now, and it’s to read the first 200 pages of your casebook. And now it’s you and the teacher (who is usually as smug as Alex Trebek) gauging and assessing what you managed to absorb while you skimmed through all those pages of reading so you could hurry up and get to the other 150 pages of reading for your next period class, in front of 50 people who are all smarter than you. And if you fuck up, or you didn’t do the reading, you are at the mercies of not just the professor, but the silent satisfied judgment of your peers. 

Law school is hard, and it will make you feel stupid and tongue-tied and like you don’t know anything and can’t form an argument—because you don’t, and you can’t. Everybody there has had a 4.0 since birth. Everybody there was the smartest kid in their class, and you’re all rabidly competing for a sliver of a chance at something down the road. It’s petty, and savage, fiercely entrenched in a culture of formalities and ceremony, and exactly like Washington DC

Yesterday when I was driving home, the NPR reporter talking about the Oval Office meeting mentioned that Trump had thought it was going to be a “getting to know you” type meeting, but that he was surprised when Obama stretched their talk out to 90 minutes before sending him along to the Capitol building where he met with congressional leaders for more lengthy meetings and stuff he didn’t want to do.

And he hasn’t even gotten to the actual job yet

So think about that as we go into this. 

Trump walked into the Oval Office like a two-pump-chump freshman thinking it was syllabus day, and what he got was the first day of law school, and he hadn’t done the reading like everyone else had, and Professor Obama decided to put him in the hot seat. 

This was Obama’s chance for the most perfect revenge that would never be picked up on as revenge at all. He was gracious, polite—everything he needed to be for a peaceful transition and a good review from the press. And that would continue when the doors were closed, because that’s the key. Not a Come to Jesus meeting, oh no. If Obama were smart—and he is very smart—he would have treated Trump like an equal, and brought the discussion to a level that assumes far more of Trump than anyone has so far. Assumes that he’s an adult who’s been paying attention. Statistics, esoteric minutiae about the executive branch procedure, economic growth numbers, labor figures, domestic policies, countries Trump has never even heard of, shit that would never in a million years have been in Trump’s campaign soundbites or digestible summaries. 

No way to escape. No aides to remember any of it for him. Just the two of them. 

Because that’s what would strike a precise chill into Trump. The thundering realization that he’s woefully unprepared for the hard, boring, thankless reality of this, and Obama’s version of a smooth transition won’t and shouldn’t include remedial civics. 

That’s what I saw when they shook hands and Trump stared at the floor instead of looking back into Obama’s face. He’s just figured out how little he knows about any of this

And that should give you a small glow of satisfaction, because after those meetings, Trump definitely has the 1L Terror Shits. In January, the night sweats and insomnia will show up, but for these first few weeks—nothing but diarrhea and self-doubt.  

klance headcanons in the canon universe

• i dont think either had a crush on the other at the garrison

• i mean, maybe lance thought keith was cute but just didn’t realize it because i feel like he thought he was straight at the garrison

• and maybe keith though lance was cute too but i feel like hes not really the type to get crushes on people at school because hes more focused on other things

• keith has always had sort-of long hair (except when he was like 5, he had a bowl haircut)

• i feel like before entering the garrison he had REALLY long hair and was like “i should cut this because why not” and just, fucked shit up, and thats why he has a mullet

• lance actually didnt have that many relationships at the garrison

• sure he had a couple short term girlfriends a few times but he was always more focused on getting good grades so he could move up classes and make his family proud

• inside red is one of the only places that keith feels safe

• even after the lion switch, red will still let keith in

• i also feel like blue would let lance in, she just HAD to completely shut him out in that moment because he had to go to red

• blue didnt want to let lance in because she knew if he came in she wouldnt want to let him go

• keith has never played a sport in his entire life

• this is why he is so bad at team-oriented things and always just wants to be left to do things on his own

• legit everytime i see “oh keith did (football, soccer, hockey, etc.)” im like, what kind of ooc bullshit

• he looks good in a hockey uniform though not gonna lie

• anyways

• keith doesnt really have taste for food unless its really really good so he doesnt mind the food goo

• speaking of the food goo i think it tastes like old tea bags and grass

• i feel like keith and lanve would have that thing where theyve both confessed that they like eachother but theyre just,, so awkward and are both waiting for the other to officially ask them on a date

• i also think that before they even knew they liked eachother, they were always in “this technically could be seen as a date” situations

• to them a date can just be hanging out in their rooms together

• which they do that literally any time they get

• they always hang out in lances room because lances room has actually been home-ified while keiths room looks like no one has ever lived in there

• when they finally sort out the altean pool, everyone learns that keith actually cant swim

• keith thought that he could swim because he thought it looked pretty self explanatory but then he gets right into the deep end and almost drowns

• keiths favorite thing to do to pass time is stare out the windows on the ship and just watch the passing planets and stars

• the thing is that he can literally be staring at it for hours on end and suddenly lance comes in like “wtf babe its 2am go to sleep” and keith is like “what :0? its only been like 20 minutes”

• lance loves to watch hunk cook food

• he especially loves it because a) hunk says some wild stuff while hes cooking and b) he gets to be the taste tester

• casual hand holding is a must

• there could be someone between them and they will just reach around and hold hands behind the person

• lance gets keith into the habbit of taking naps (which isnt really a good thing considering their current job)

• so they both stop taking naps (unless given permission to chill) but instead the move into the same room (they move into lances room bc keiths room can go fuck itself)

• theyll say their going to bed at 9 but then spend 3 hours just talking to eachother about random shit

• they always have something to talk about with eachother

• lance has a secret obsession with keiths hair (despite always complaining about it) and will always run his fingers through it

• keith also has an obsession with lances hair but not in the same way

• while lance likes keiths hair because its soft and fluffy and long, keith likes lances hair because its good for fidgeting with

• lance will lay between keiths legs with his back to keiths chest while talking to the team and keith will just absent mindly touch lances hair

• nose kisses!

• nose kisses before battles!

• nose kisses before going to sleep!

• nose!

• kisses!

• 🅱️ls

• keith goes to lance or shiro for comfort depending on what type of comfort he needs

• one time in their late night talks they started talking about the future and where their relationship will go

• (after dating for a few years) their like basically engaged without either of them having ever asked

• anyways, back to that late night talk

• lance brings up kids and is like “oh yeah, you probably dont want any kids :(” and keith just stares at him like boy the fuck

• “lance i have never really had a family but i desperately want one, i want 10000 kids”

• ok im definitely gonna make a keith and lance as dads hc post after this

OH HEY I HAD MY MERMAID PARTY YESTERDAY

Good news- the small child was perfectly enchanted by her mermaid surprise unlike the first mermaid party I did where the birthday girl wanted to be as FAR AWAY FROM THE MERMAID AS POSSIBLE

they wheeled me out on a desk chair which was pretty hilarious but actually worked a lot better than a Throne of Dads

and then omfg to get me in the pool

they put me in one of those disability chairs that you sit in and it sloooooowly lowers you into the pool

so I just sat in it, princess-waving for a full 5 minutes while I’m majestically lowered into the water. hilarious

Unlike the last party I actually was SWIMMING the whole time! They plopped me right into the deep end and I paddled around with the kids (who had floaties on and were swimming with their parents). Birthday girl was more than happy to show Marina the Mermaid how she can dunk her head in the water and jump off the side into her mom’s arms (she had just turned 4). Super cute.

MERMAID SUCCESS. I DIDN’T DROWN

pool [class 1a] hcs

someone asked for swimming hcs a while ago so here we are (finally)

  • Aoyama Yuuga probably contours his non-existent abs.
  • Ashido Mina is the president of the Tanning Squad™. She is stocked with tanning lotion and oil, and is not playing games - this girl came here on a mission to leave looking like a sun goddess.
  • Asui Tsuyu is the girl that goes to the pool and wears the one-piece school swimsuit. Is a very good swimmer but has an inflatable tube around her the whole time.
  • Iida Tenya is the unofficial lifeguard. He purchased a whistle specifically for this event. Will reprimand you if you eat before you swim and do not follow proper aquatic ethics. He is also the only one that came here to actually swim.
  • Uraraka Ochako takes pool activities way too competitively. Was put on a time-out by Iida for being too aggressive during water polo.
  • Ojiro Mashirao “accidentally” hit Bakugou in the face during water polo. Wears over-sized sunglasses to hide the side-eye he gives to some of his classmates. 
  • Kaminari Denki is the guy that asks every single girl to put sun tan lotion on him. He is not as smooth as he thinks he is.
  • Kirishima Eijiro is also in the Tanning Squad™. Unfortunately, he fell asleep with a half-eaten doughnut on his stomach and has the tan-line to prove it.
  • Kouda Kouji brought inflatables, and chills out at the quieter end of the pool.
  • Satou Rikidou is that guy who wears a speedo that is just a hair too small. He is vice president of the Tanning Squad™.
  • Shouji Mezou brought his yoga mat. He came here with the intention of meditating on a warm summer day, but under-estimated the noise level of his classmates.
  • Jirou Kyouka is the phone DJ at this event. Had to tussle with Kaminari a few times after he attempted to play R. Kelly’s Bump N’ Grind.
  • Sero Hanta brought water guns. He snuck up on the Tanning Squad™ and shot each of them with water. He was almost killed by Ashido soon after.
  • Tokoyami Fumikage stays under the umbrella the entire time yet still applies sun tan lotion every 30 minutes.
  • Todoroki Shouto does not understand why girls keep walking up to him and talking to him. He is also at the receiving end of glares from some of his fellow male classmates and is confused by it.
  • Hagakure Tooru is the uncrowned champion in marco polo. Will defend this title until the very end.
  • Bakugou Katsuki is the guy who just chooses not to have fun for no reason. Like why is he standing in the deep end of the pool with a sour look on his face???
  • Midoriya Izuku low-key does not know how to swim and stays on an inflatable bed to avoid suspicion.
  • Mineta Minoru was purposefully not invited due to his perverted antics. 
  • Yaoyorozu Momo organized the whole event. Prepared a list of activities that no one actually followed.

1. You said “you’re great” “you are the best” “you’re amazing” while we f*cked. You called it love making. It was your best effort yet. I felt second hand embarrassment. You said it was the best to date.I wished i was watching the food network. I faked it three times. I Took your hoodie anyways.

2. You said you loved me, then described the only girl you ever truly cared about. I was thankful that I never said it or felt it back. I feel less guilty for not loving you.

3. You said that it’s pathetic how girls call you at night. You said you’d never answer at 2 am, even for me. You said you love control. I said you shouldn’t be so hard on people.

4. You spoke condescendingly of suicide. I didn’t even cross your mind as you said it.

5. You thought it was funny that I was sober for the first time in a while.

6. You said you trusted me. Then you said all women are incapable of being faithful.

7. You know you’re smart. You know you’re brilliant at giving head because I told you. You have absolutely no idea when you are right or wrong, and don’t bother to find out.

8. You said you loved me, you asked me to love you too, and that you couldn’t fuck anyone else because you can’t bother with dating apps. Oh, and because you really, really love me.

9. You pretend to listen when I say that I’m not in love. You say you’re jealous and need me in your life. I say no. You think its a joke. I just left and blocked your number while you fell asleep, cluelessly.

10. You feel so sorry for yourself. I don’t feel sorry for you. You view upper hands as trophies. I think you have daddy issues.

11. I feel grateful for peeking into your head. I can’t do cartwheels in the shallow end of a pool.

You say love is a risk, and encourage me to jump in. I think it’s reckless, not romantic. I am not the one afraid of deep waters. I just know yours is too shallow to for diving.

12. I packed to leave. You asked me where I was going. I said be safe darling. and blew you a kiss. You stood outside the door waiting for me to come back to his apartment. When my elevator landed on the first floor, I noticed how pretty the marble was.

The Morning After

Request: I would love a Bucky smut where him and reader have to go undercover as a married couple.

Summary: You were supposed to go on a undercover mission with Steve, not the man you despised- James Buchanan Barnes.

Warnings: smut, sexual tension, fluff

A/N: I have another draft of this written up but it was all over the place and I didn’t like it so I switched to this one.


“I know you were expecting to go on this mission with Steve, but we have a job to do.” Bucky threw a towel over his shoulder, heading toward the door of the hotel room.

“Well, once you took Steve’s place this mission just got exponentially harder.” You stepped out of the bathroom, towel and sunscreen in your hand.

“How so?” He smiled, cocking an eyebrow at you.

You jutted your hip out, rolling your eyes at him. Your bikini was nothing special; it had a pushup top that accentuated your breasts perfectly, but that was about it. The top and the bottom matched with blue and white stripes. You topped the outfit off with red sunglasses; the suit was meant to get a chuckle from Steve, not Bucky.

“Because now I have to pretend I’m head over heels in love with you, not Steve.” You flipped the light off. “Let’s just go check out the damn pool.”

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Stop saying Israel “appropriated” the Magen David as an argument for banning Jewish symbols at your events. First of all, that’s not what appropriation means. Jewish people can’t “appropriate” their own symbols. That would be like me saying the Muslim populace of Pakistan “appropriated” the Crescent and Star of Islam because I come from an anti-partition Indian family. Second of all, I don’t give a flying fuck what some country I’ve never lived in has on its flag, that’s my religious symbol and you don’t get to fucking define what it means for me. ISIS uses Arabic on its flag and I don’t go around telling my friends from Egypt and Saudi that they can’t speak their native language because it’s been “appropriated” by terrorists.

I swear to G-d I think some of y'all just want to make things as bad as possible for Jews so that we all flee to Israel, thus making us Zionists it’s ok for you to hate and eliminate. Never mind that that would be a disaster for everybody in the region, especially Palestinians. Stop and think long and hard about what your actual goals are here and what you want to achieve before wading into the deep-end of the anti-Semitism pool.

Caught In The Crossfire // A Mitch Rapp Smut

Relationship: Mitch Rapp x Reader

Warnings: NSFW, Explicit Sexual Content, Smut, Oral (Female on Male), Unprotected Sex, Extremely Graphic Violence, Very Graphic Deaths, Angst, Physical Torture, Swearing, and your heart might just break. 

Word Count: 8,123

Song: Trouble by Halsey

A/N: I was definitely not expecting this fic to take the turn it does but, honestly, I wouldn’t have it any other way. Shoutout to my ultimate homie @stilinski-jpeg for letting me pester her with ideas and helping me decide which ones to add to the fic. I love you, sis. Anyway, I really hope you guys like this because, fuck, I sure do. 


Mitch Rapp is the ultimate secret agent this world has ever seen — James Bond doesn’t even come close enough to compare to him. Ever since Katrina’s death, he has completely dedicated his life to clearing the planet of terrorists. He fights crime, kills bad guys and saves innocent lives on a daily basis. The CIA has even gone as far as to call Mitch Rapp the perfect weapon, capable and skilled beyond imagination.

(Y/N) (Y/L/N) is the scariest and most badass villain out there, very well known all over the world for her vicious crimes. Stealing, kidnapping, making a fortune off the black market, torturing her enemies and, especially, brutally killing are some of her many specialties. People around the planet talk about and even fear (Y/N) (Y/L/N) for what she has already done and what she is planning on doing next.

So, you’d think that when Mitch Rapp was assigned to eliminate this particular target who has caused enough chaos around her, he would’ve immediately killed her the first chance he got, right?

Wrong.

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Protective

Happy Smut Appreciation Day!

Summary: It all starts as a way to piss off Dean…

warnings: Cas x Reader, unprotected sex, grace!kink, oral sex (male receiving)

word count: ~2500


The four of you had just finished a hunt and decided to celebrate by going out to the local bar, have a few beers, and play some pool.

That was all well and good, until your two on two (you and Sam vs Dean and Castiel) game of pool had been interrupted by some blonde skank catching Dean’s eye.  You were now perched at a high top table, nursing a beer and seething.

So what?  You didn’t necessarily like Dean that way, but it still pissed you off when he ditched you and the boys for no good reason.  The feeling of jealousy and anger came from the fact that at the end of the day, these boys were yours. Dean, Sam, Cas – they were all you had, and you never wanted anyone to take that away from you.

Yeah, you could be a selfish bitch, but whatever.

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Speak Softly and Carry a Big Stick

Your roomie freshman year calls herself Inari, like the sushi, which you try not to roll your eyes at. It’s obviously a weaboo thing, since she’s definitely not anywhere near Japanese with her red-blonde hair and blue eyes. She also has two dads who work for the forest service - one blond and stocky, the other tall and red-haired, and they both call her Flower when they kiss her goodbye before leaving. You’re too polite to ask which one is her real dad.

There’s far weirder stuff at university to worry about than that.

Inari (who, thank god, doesn’t put up anime posters or talk about manga and maybe you were wrong about the nickname?) pays as much lip service to the weird traditions of Elsewhere as everyone else does, and a few more besides. She accepts them without comment when other people laugh them off, like they’re common sense, like she’s done it all her life. When people whisper about seeing things in the deep end of the pool or in the forest or in the depths of the library, she doesn’t blink an eye. When you whisper to her one night that you think these strange traditions might actually be in place for a reason she says “of course they are.” Like she’s known all along.

Inari wears her iron and carries her salt, but she doesn’t add to the stories and the gossip and hysteria. She’s aiming for law school, which you can already tell that she’ll be great at. You share theology and history and you’ve never seen her lose a debate. She’s crafty and smart and more focused than anyone else you’ve met at Elsewhere, and you wonder if she’s decided she just doesn’t have time for the stories. You wonder how someone can both accept and completely ignore The Neighbours. You wish you could.

Then Apples from your lit class gets replaced by something Else, and her girlfriend spends the evening bawling in your room  Inari listens, then sighs, and packs a bag. Then she pulls a rusty iron bar out of her closet, and heads out into the forest under the cover of moonlight. You don’t want to watch, you don’t want to think about what might happen. You clench your iron medallion tighter and try to tell yourself that the hulking dark shape that appears next to her is just the shadows of the trees, that you didn’t see the moonlight glint off green, inhuman eyes.

(You never expect to see her again.)

Except she comes back, and Apples is back in her place, seeming none the worse for wear (though she leaves paper-wrapped notebooks by the fountain every full moon until she graduates). Inari says nothing, but during finals she disappears into the library after someone else, clutching her her iron bar and accompanied by a tall man in a black frock coat.

“How do you do it?” You ask when you can’t stand not knowing. “How do you know…”

Inari shrugs. “My fairy godfather taught me how to be the right kind of persuasive. It’s simple once you know how. You speak softly… and carry a big stick.”

You hope that in this case, fairy godfather is some queer term. You’re afraid to ask her clarify.

After that the whispers start. That if you’re desperate to get someone back, you go to Inari, who never seems particularly happy, but eventually accepts most pleas. She can’t and won’t help everyone, of course. If your friend was desperate enough to kiss Anna Monday there’s nothing to be done. And she always asks for a favor in return, to be held in trust until a time of her choosing.

A favor in trust is a serious price, at Elsewhere. But at least Inari is human, they reason, staring at her bare hand wrapped around the iron bar.

At least she seems human enough.

x

Thinking About You // Park Jimin

-

the prompt: hellooo !! can i request a Jimin fluff where like you guys are friends and stuff but he’s like fuckboy!jimin and y'all decide to hang out by the pool and it ends up being rlly fluffy!!!

words: 1448

category: fluff! + drabble?

author note: i tried so hard to write jimin as an fboy but i think i may have failed (idek). he’s just so soft :/hope you like the direction i took it in! (also i kinda made him a swimmer? you said pool and i thought of swimming athlete jimin so…)(also pls enjoy the gif below)

- destinee

Originally posted by kpopidolaegyooo


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Sincerely Three Fourth of July Headcanons

Here are some headcanons with the reader and the DEH boys, partially inspired by @dr-evn-hnsn‘s post about Evan not liking the noise from fireworks!

Jared:

-        Jared gets super into it the clothing aspect. He wears those bathing suit bottoms that look like an American flag and red-white-and-blue sunglasses and flip-flops with stars on the straps

-        He’s so excited he convinces you to spray a couple strips of your hair with that spray-on temporary hair dye so you have red and blue highlights

-        He starts a competition to see who can make the biggest splash jumping into the pool

-        Everyone knows he’ll win but he convinces everyone to play anyway

-        And he just freaking leaps into the air and does the most massive cannonball into the water

-        You get absolutely soaked but you’re laughing anyway

-        He’s all sputtery when he comes up and is blind since he’s not wearing his glasses, and you come up behind him and grab onto him

-        He twists around and grabs your waist and kisses you while dragging your around the pool

-        And then he scoops you up and starts to climb out of the water and you know what’s coming

-        “Jared NOOOOO”

-        “babe no don’t worry I got you, I won’t drop you”

-        But then he freaking throws you into the water

-        And obviously jumps in after you and you guys end up kissing again until everyone else starts splashing you and then Jared starts splashing them back and it’s suddenly total chaos

-        He gets Very Sunburned because he’s a pale nerd from spending so much time inside playing videogames

-        When it’s time to make dinner, Jared starts off helping with the grill but then ends up in the kitchen with you so he can snag bites of watermelon and potato salad

-        There’s a table for the adults but Jared convinces you to sit at the kids’ table because the kids love him

-        Everybody eats way too much and Jared gets into a burping contest with your little cousins

-        As it starts to get dark he “supervises” while they play with pop-its and sparklers

-        Which is really just an excuse for him to play with pop-its and sparklers

-        He flipping loves sparklers

-        There’s lots of cuddling on the lawn when the fireworks go off

-        And so much kissing

-        Also Jared singing “Firework” in your ear until you’re both laughing hysterically

Evan:

-        The boy is always wearing blue, so obviously that’s what he wears today, but he insists it’s patriotic

-        “Look, my shoes are red, so it works!”

-        The house is really crowded, but everyone’s outside so you and Evan hang out inside for a while

-        Heidi is making cupcakes and the two of you help her

-        She has this cute blue and white apron

-        And apparently Evan has one two

-        You can’t help but giggle when he puts it on but really it’s adorable on him, which you tell him

-        Evan puts red, white, and blue icing in piping bags and starts piping all these pretty, swirly designs on the cupcakes

-        He helps teach you how to pipe the icing…you hold the piping bag and he puts his hands over yours and guides you

-        After the cupcakes are finished, you and Evan decide to try the pool

-        You both agree you’ll go back inside if it gets too overwhelming with all the people outside

-        You’ve never seen Evan in his bathing suit and the shorts are incredibly dorky with big white hibiscuses on them

-        He looks very cute

-        You and Evan get in the pool and it’s LOUD

-        Most of the kids are at the shallow end so you guys go to the deep end and go underwater because the noise is obnoxious

-        You and Evan just look at each other underwater and he gets this really shy smile on his face and it’s adorable

-        You and Evan do handstands underwater

-        He gives you little kisses and plays with your hair

-        You guys mouth “I love you” back and forth and then laugh because of all the bubbles

-        You guys wait for a little while after everyone gets out because it’s finally quiet

-        You lie on your back in the water and hold hands

-        Eventually you get out and eat dinner on the lawn because it’s quiet and also you’re still dripping from the pool

-        Everyone goes out front to play with sparklers, and you guys join because Evan really likes sparklers

-        He sits next to you a little ways away from the kids and you guys watch the way the sparklers spark

-        The fireworks start and you’re both kind of uncomfortable with the noise

-        They’re so pretty but you both keep flinching every time one goes off

-        Evan grabs his phone and two sets of earbuds

-        He has one of those earbud-splitter-things so you can both plug the earbuds into the phone

-        He turns on Owl City while you guys watch the fireworks

-        Literally every Owl City makes the fireworks 10000% more magical

-        Evan kisses you while “Meteor Shower” plays and those gold fizzy fireworks go off

Connor:

-        Wears a black tank top and black shorts, obviously. But the hair tie he normally has on his wrist is red

-        You’re pretty sure he stole it from Zoe

-        It’s ridiculously hot out and he ties his hair up in a knot (he refuses to call it a man bun)

-        This hair tie is blue

-        All of Connor’s and your families are there and it’s way too crowded

-        Both of you are tempted to hide in Connor’s room but yours and his parents keep telling you to come out and socialize

-        Everyone’s in the pool but Connor’s just standing there in his black outfit

-        You have your bathing suit on under your clothes but you feel too uncomfortable to take your clothes off

-        He keeps saying he doesn’t want to get in and you’re pretty sure it’s cause he’s insecure about what he looks like without a shirt on (even though he’s actually kinda muscular)

-        You’re also insecure about the way you look in a bathing suit

-        But it’s freaking hot and the water looks really nice

-        You grab Connor’s hand and tug him toward the pool

-        “I’m gonna throw you in”

-        “No, I’m gonna throw you in”

-        “No, I’m gonna—”

-        And then Connor picks you up and he doesn’t throw you in he jumps in with you

-        Like he does a cannonball with you cradled in his arms

-        You come up laughing and wrap your arms around his shoulders and just kiss him

-        Zoe starts yelling at you but really she’s just happy because Connor’s smiling

-        Underwater kisses

-        You pull the hair tie out of Connor’s hair and play with his hair underwater

-        You guys argue about who has better mermaid hair

-        Eventually you both agree Zoe has better mermaid hair than either of you

-        You guys get out when it’s time to eat

-        Connor eats a meal almost entirely made up of watermelon

-        Seriously he eats half a hamburger and like twelve slices of watermelon

-        He gets a stomach ache afterward and the two of you lay on the lawn in your wet clothes and try to find interesting shapes in the clouds

-        Connor’s nose is a tiny bit sunburned and you keep kissing the tip of it

-        Zoe eventually joins you guys on the lawn

-        Her hair is in a really pretty fishtail braid and you ask her to teach you how to do it

-        And of course you practice on Connor

-        Connor rests his forehead on your shoulder while you try to braid his hair

-        It makes it kind of difficult but you really don’t mind

-        Everyone gathers on the lawn eventually to watch the fireworks

-        Connor’s parents put on a playlist of patriotic songs

-        You and Connor and Zoe sit together and watch the fireworks

-        Connor starts out watching but ends up falling asleep in your lap

-        Eventually a loud firework makes him wake up enough to groggily whisper that he loves you

Humans are weird

Ok, so but like what if humans are the only ones who have the whole learning by doing concept? Because sure, we send our young to school for like fourteen years of their life but we still have a pretty prevalent attitude of “eh, let them try it, they’ll either figure it out or learn what not to do next time”. What if aliens are more learn through learning and are just really baffled by humans, particulartly human universities which are basically big melting pots of; “This is either going to kill me OR BE REALLY FUCKING EPIC” 

Alien children are taught exactly why it is a bad idea to enter a pool before they learn to swim, given instuction on all the proper swimming techniques before they even touch water and not allowed out of the shallows until they can prove proficiency in t least two of them. 

An alarming number of human think it is acceptable to teach swimming by tossing someone into the deep end.