the cussing

Alternative Cusses

I work in an old folks home, which is somewhere you really can’t cuss because of the high concentration of seniors, so I’ve been finding myself using substitutes that are a little bit.. unconventional?  (Some say you should just stop cussing altogether but frankly that is fake and impossible because life is frustrating.)

  • Shit = Garbage, as in: “Holy Garbage” etc.
  • Fuck/Fucking = Funk, or Funky, as in “I keep dropping this thing on my FUNKY toe”
  • Jesus Christ = Cheese'n Crackers… not original but funny to me at least
  • Son of a bitch = Son of a Westley (This one found its way into my lexicon via Olan Rogers, it’s a long story but there’s a video)
    [Note: I also like “Son of a Binch” but I tend not to use it there because it sounds too similar and I don’t want to accidentally offend someone. I do use this one in life though because I just enjoy it]
  • BONUS = “Heck” in place of cuss words that are not the word Hell, as in “I lost my Hecking blood pressure cuff”, “Son of a Heck”, “Mother HECKER,” etc.
  • It’s also always good to bring back that good ol’ classic “What in Tarnation” just because nobody uses it anymore (…did anybody real? ever? use this??)  Makes me think of Yosemite Sam and when that pops into my head I can’t really be angry any more.

I hope you will find these substitutions at least as entertaining and a lot less boring than the usual standbys.  Feel free to incorporate them into your daily life for Health and Vitality.

Private Moment- Auston Matthews

Originally posted by laurafortino

Ok so I went a little angsty/upset, with the cute picture and Mitch you know… being Mitch so I hope you guys enjoy it!

Warning: Cussing, anger

Anon Request: I LOVE EVERYTHING YOU WRITE SO MUCH And I love you 💞 could you do one where someone on the team posts a really cute and intimate picture of you and auston?


              You were definitely not expecting your phone to blow up.

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anonymous asked:

Some shidan and garrack ;w; discussing, drinking, just more of them and maybe have shidan ACTUALLY kiss the lady. Uhh idk if you’ve incorporated them modern au but if not canon verse is good! :)


Garrack’s TA startles, and she stifles a laugh. He’s a high-strung kid, more limbs than sense at times, but a hard-worker nonetheless. He doesn’t have the natural aptitude of Ryuu, or the studious heart of Shirayuki, or even Obi’s gift of lateral thinking, but he’s the sort of kid that doesn’t give up. He’ll throw himself against a wall before he’ll walk away from it – or, she can’t help thinking a bit uncharitably, go around it.

Listen, they’ll be hand-pouring gels for month to make up the cost of the boxes he went through only to realize he was using the wrong fucking ones. For fuck’s sake, they have a chart.

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I have no idea why but my [almost] 10 year is like weirdly attached to Scanlan.  I mean don’t get me wrong she loves Vex, she’s dressed up like Vex, she had a stuffed bear named trinket.  BUT, she still refuses to watch critical role.  We as critters have mostly moved on but this stubborn child who is more offended by the word sex than any cuss word I’ve ever uttered in her presence loves that Lewd fucking gnome.

It has now spilled over in any other media we hear Sam Riegel in.  Like we watched Blue Exorcist the other day and she heard his voice.

“mom is that scanlan?”
“what his real name?”
“Sam Riegel.”
“I like Same Riegel, too bad he betrayed me.”

Like settle down child.

My Shot

Pairing: Lin x reader

Words: 645

Prompt: “Lin x reader where the reader she is eliza and during the break she raps immigrants (we get the job done) or My shot and he’s like damn my girl friend is amazing???”


Warnings: allusions to alcohol and sex, cussing

A/N: The title is kind of lame, but I couldn’t think of a better one. And hopefully this satisfies your request? (:

Sundays were always the best days, in your opinion. After your weekly coffee date with Renée, you laced yourself into a corset and took the stage as Elizabeth Schuyler Hamilton, alongside the one and only Lin-Manuel Miranda.

Though you were intimidated at first by his fame and genius, you and Lin soon became close friends. A few months ago, he admitted that he had romantic feelings for you, and you decided to go steady. It was the best decision you had ever made – besides auditioning to be the Eliza understudy, maybe. And getting to be his wife for three hours every Sunday? It was a dream.

“Y/n!” Jasmine squealed as you and Renée walked into the dressing room that the three Schuyler sisters shared. “I missed you!”

“Jazzy, I saw you last night,” you laughed.

“I doubt she remembers, she was drunk off her ass,” Renée joked. You laughed as Jasmine shrugged. It had been an interesting night; one of the ensemble members had a birthday party that contained lots of alcohol, and you got to know the Hamilton cast like never before.

“Well, that explains the headache. But hey, we’ve got a show to do! With Y/n!” Jasmine smiled. She really was too kind.

You beamed back at her and sat down at Pippa’s dressing table, examining your appearance in the mirror: Tousled hair that you hadn’t bothered to brush yet. Small smudges of mascara from the night before. Black eye bags to envy Lin’s; he did keep you up late many nights, and last night was no exception. To be honest, your legs were still a bit weak too. Thanks Lin, you thought, smiling.

“It’s really quiet in here. Jazzy, can you put on some music?” Renée asked, doing her eyeliner perfectly. What a queen. Jasmine nodded and picked up her phone, putting her music on shuffle and turning her attention back to her eyebrows.

You and Renée both started to laugh when “My Shot” came on. “Really, Jazzy?” You joked.  “You’re in the show eight times a week, for christ’s sake. Aren’t you sick of this song already?” Jasmine laughed.

“Hey, it’s a pretty damn good soundtrack. Besides, sometimes I like to pretend I’m different characters, you know?”

“A colony that runs independently, meanwhile Britain keeps shittin’ on us endlessly…” you started to rap along to Alexander’s lyrics, matching the strokes of your blush to the song’s tempo. You were so immersed in the song that you didn’t notice Lin standing in the doorway, arms crossed, grinning at the sight. Jasmine and Renée shared a knowing look as you kept going, determined to finish the song.

“I am not throwin’ away my, not throwin’ away my shot!” You finished, hitting the highest note with the ensemble, mascara brush in the air. Lin clapped and you turned around, suddenly noticing his presence.

“Damn, Y/n, I didn’t know you made such a good Alexander Hamilton.” He grinned, your heart melting.

“Better watch out babe, I’m coming for your job.” You stood up, crossing over in your white dress to embrace your boyfriend. He kissed you sweetly, smiling into your mouth.

“Does that mean I get to be Eliza, then?”

You laughed. “Of course, I’m not going to pass up the opportunity to be married to you, even if it is onstage.”
Lin smirked. “Would you marry me offstage?”

You pretended to contemplate it. “Maybe one day, yeah. But you better serenade me, Lin-Manuel Miranda.” You poked a finger into his chest, and he laughed, burying his face in your hair.

“God, just get married already!” Jazzy exclaimed from across the room. “Bless the world with your absurdly talented children.” You and Lin laughed, smiling at each other, his warm brown eyes staring into yours.

You leaned in for another kiss. “I love you, my Eliza.”

“I love you too, my Alexander.”

“Our Love” BTS Jimin & Yoongi- Drabble

@thelittlecheshirekitten requested: can i request a vampire angst bts drabble type thing XD ? with the prompts 26, 50 and 22 with jimin x reader x yoongi. thank you so much if you decide to do this i love you blog soo much <3 <3 <3

A/N: Thanks for requesting!! <3 Lovely choice of prompts!!  I enjoyed very much doing this request! :D Hope you like it n.n. Have Good Day! <3

Prompt:  “I’m both a lover and a fighter. I’ll take you down and then give you a kiss.” | “I’m losing my cold hearted reputation here” | “It’s ok, you don’t have to love me”

WordCount: 2.6k
Genre: Angst, Vampire!Au
Triggers: blood, violence, cussing, vampire.
Pairing: JiminxReader(she)xYoongi


“Fucking bitch” he grunted swaying his pocket blade.

A painful and stinging pain made your breath hitched.

He had stabbed you.

You recognized the warmth of the liquid sliding down and drenching your clothes before noticing the bleeding. Your hand reached to shield the open wound, legs trembling getting weaker and weaker until you fell landing on a small carpet of frosty grass.
The assaulter leaned down hovering above you, the dizziness of the alcohol made it difficult to take in an exact image, but the cold that touched your skin gave a certainty that he was, in fact, removing clothes from you, the shock of the stabbing trailed your mind somewhere far away from the scene.
Slowly everything faded; your sight turning blurry, making the street light transform into stars; The blood flowing between your fingers became a friendly almost pleasant feeling, reminiscing a strong hand holding onto yours.

‘I’m dying’
 you wept internally.

A sensation of void crawled slowly enveloping your body on its claws. It was a cold different from the one that accumulated on the spiky grass beneath you, wilder and vicious.
Said void had reached out enclosing your vision. Ironically you remembered how it was commonly said that when you die there is a tunnel of light where you reach for another world. But instead, darkness was reaching you, and the light of your own life ran away from it, escaping.
Tears rolled down your eyes as you felt his heavy and sweaty body pressing against you.

“You know,” someone spoke, interrupting.

‘Who is that?’ Your mind wondered

“Normally we don’t like to eat garbage, but for you scum, I’ll wash my mouth later” A gravelly voice chuckled, not far from you.

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Come Back Down, Part 13

Title: Come Back Down Part 13

Rated: PG-13 for cussing, etc

Summary: Jensen and Y/N get an unwelcome, unexpected visitor.

A/N: Thanks for being patient with me. I finally saved enough to purchase a really cheap lap top and will hopefully be able to write and post a lot more efficiently for here on out. Thanks for reading my stuff! (Also, kind reminder that my views are not necessarily reflected here, but I needed a villain. Don’t roast me please.)

Tagging: @perpetualabsurdity, @maileann, @daydreamingintheimpala, @gecko9596, @gemini75eeyore, @jotink78, @dancingalone21, @winchesterprincessbride, @sandlee44, @exploratiionist, @arryn-nyxx, @littledarlinhavefaithinme, @tiffanycaruso, @boredoutofmymindstuff, @feelmyroarrrr, @raeganr99, @ruprecht0420, @anokhi07, @letsgetyourdeanon, @sis-tafics, @jensen-gal, @theoneandonlysaucymo, @27bmm, @callmesatansprincess, @hbenth, @atc74

Master List  (if you need to catch up)

The face that confronted me from Y/N’s front door was definitely not one I’d been expecting. “Danneel?” Just saying her name made rocks grind around my insides. Judging by just her expression, this was not going to be good.

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That “Boundary”

I really wish he wasn’t so caring to the point where he’s scared to pass the comfortable/relationship line with me when in reality there is no line. Like if you want us to have cuss word nicknames for each other, or playfully punch me while joking with me, or ask me to share my lunch when you don’t have one, or text me a pic of what you’re eating to make me jealous, or even just take my pencil and run, go ahead. Seriously go ahead.

anonymous asked:

We're also ignoring that Tom Kenny DID say "penis" in another show .... multiple times even

Oh If you’ve watched enough adult animation he’s said much worse.
In fact I’m pretty sure he’s cussed in his SpongeBob voice.
I think it’s more so that we didn’t expect to hear it in Samurai Jack, even after going to Adult Swim.

I feel like my mutuals are more active on twitter than tumblr now and like I have a twitter ofc and interact with them all but I’ve had this twitter since 2009 and a bunch of like…..high school classmates and some family members and um people like that follow me on there so I can’t cuss or talk about like actual stuff on there so anyway I’m debating making a second account that I can use and feel more free on there, anyway what do y'all think