the circus and their crew

Could the Candy be something other then the ring. Kuroshitsuji Chapter 128

Okay throwing this out there as a means of dealing with what’s going on in Kuroshitsuji and the events that have unfolded recently. To those looking for the new Voltron Shipping list, working on that as we speak.

Anyway, what I wanted to talk about was something that has been bothering me for a while in regard to the recent situations regarding the Blue Sect arc and what people have been ignoring in regard to story lines and developments, in favor of the 2CT theory. So before I begin I’d like to lay out some ground work.

First we need to talk about demons and exactly the rules that have been set forth by events in the manga. We know that in order to summon a demon you must be willing to give up your soul for a wish. This means that no murder has to be done, no blood sacrifice, just someone willing to give up their soul. The reason I bring this up is because of the rules set forth by Sebastian.

1. You have to be willing to give up your soul to summon them.

2. Normal events that were seen as witch meetings or what the cult was doing would not work.

By these two rules alone we now know that a demon cannot be summoned by a normal kill them all way. This also means that the person that was killed on the table was NOT the reason why Sebastian was summoned. Rather either Ciel was wishing it at the time and Sebastian heard it, or someone else was wishing to have a demon come with all their soul.

Keep in mind that if there was a twin this would mean that his wish was to summon a demon for some reason. If he died he would have had to have been reaped right away. Or his soul would have been devoured at some point given that the wish would need to be fulfilled before the demon could eat.

Problem is that Sebastian hasn’t eaten. We know that because he says he hasn’t. So if there was a twin, where is the soul exactly?

Second we have to discuss what Sebastian also said, and I’m going via the fan translation, as I do not have that issue and I need to get it next time I go to the book store. Sebastian mentions off handedly, that there are some that appear at random though. This adds to the rules that demons have to apparently abide by.

1. They need to be summoned normally.

2. In order to summon them you have to have a strong wish and a willingness to part with your soul.

3. Some demons do not need summons and appear randomly, meaning that they break the rules.

We know that there are quirky demons, Sebastian is one of them as he’s a picky eater. Yet his line about them appearing randomly was so throw away I don’t think people really thought about it at the time. I need this kept in mind.

One other factor that needs to be mentioned is that Othello notes in discussing demons, he states that the people the normally summon demons are those that are simplistic, as we saw with the people that wanted Sebastian and that he refused them as their wishes were dull, and once the wish is fulfilled the contracts done and the person is dead.

However he also notes that there are situations where there’s someone that is beyond the simple wish idea, and that makes things that are groundbreaking, thus keeping the demon interested in the long haul.

We also know, thanks to Sebastian, that demons can and do change their looks. Sebastian became the human butler that we all know about, and he’s also made himself out to look like other people (although he’s mostly retained his normal looks for reasons).

So to add in on the rules that we have about demons we now have.

1. They need to be summoned normally via someone willing to give up their soul to get the wish.

2. Witches Sabbaths and events like the Cults activity would not summon a demon

3. Normal demons tend to not be picky about who and tend to prefer to take contracts from.

4. Demons tend to take Simple people as they are a one and done situation for them to eat.

5. There are abnormal demons that have quirks ala Sebastian

6. Some Demons do not need to be summoned and appear at random

7. Some demons do not pick simple people and help develop amazing things with them.

8. Demons can change physical appearance.

With these facts in mind we need to delve into the next area.

Second fact that I want to talk about is the fact that we have Othello’s comments at the start and it’s restated later before the attack on Soma and Agni.

In the scene early on we have Grell hanging around, as you do, and suddenly in pops Othello noting he’s there to investigate matters because the deaths seem weird. Fast forward to the first time the demon is mentioned by the forensic officer.  

When he’s talking about the machines they find in the back room, Othello notes that demons have helped people create such things, but this seems even bigger than just that. Given what we know now about the size of the operation there’s a possibility that you could still do what needed to be done and build things if you have the right number of people, as the Green witch arc showed.

Furthermore the second time a demon is mentioned directly by Othello is when he’s talking about events that are happening in the record. He mentions that demons can act as an external influence that could change things for everyone.

This I think is a strong hint in connection to the record book that there are demons that might be involved in all of this. We know from Othello now that a demonic influence can not only affect the life of the contractor but also everyone around that persons as well.

Thirdly, let’s talk about the ring that Ciel had in Sebastian’s memories. We see that the ring is in a pool of blood in Ciel’s hand. However the hand is not covered in blood the way that you would have it if you were rooting around someone’s inside. It would be far messier and while Ciel’s cuffs are covered in blood, this may not be from digging a ring out of someone’s stomach. If it is, that’s one of the cleanest jobs I’ve ever seen, or the ring didn’t go all way down into the guts.

In a number of cases people had hidden items by swallowing that item and throwing them up later. This could be the case with Ciel, where the blood we see is from his throat after he threw up the contents inside him (what little he probably had) and the ring from probably cutting up tissue and such in the throat. Vomiting up a ring could take a while as you have to empty a lot out of your guts and you can, and do, in some cases puke blood.

Fourthly we have to talk about the fire, or rather demonic fire to be honest. 

According to Undertaker Vincent was burned up to the point that there was no bones left. We know for a fact that when Sebastian burned the house down in the circus arc there was no one there but doll whom they had to kill. We also know that Sebastian burned down the original cult house and that was an inferno.

Lastly we need to talk in short of Doll and Snake. During the Circus arc we saw that every member of the group was killed save her until the very end. We know that because of the fact that the two of them are alive that someone could have gotten out of the fire situation if they were outside of the range of it.

So based on recent events in the story and older chapters I’m going to put forth a theory as to what might be happening in regard to the death of Agni and why of all people Soma was targeted.

Adding this in because I thought this was really rather interesting and it connects to something I’m about to bring up down below. @thedarkestcrow and @midnight-in-town, both had connecting posts (here and here) in regard to this asked question “ What if there is no Twin.”

In their post the poster noted the possibility of someone gas lighting Ciel into thinking his twin was alive. This could fall right into what Blavat wants and makes additional sense. They also noted that someone had to have told Baron Kelvin about what the set up was for the cult event that he missed. This means that there’s the chance that someone survived. And we know that one can survive the demon fire if you’re not in the place when it’s burning. Doll was only killed after she made it to the location, so we know that once outside you can live.

There’s also the fact that Ciel has been carried out of the fire by Sebastian, and we know that demons can control fire.

We know for a fact that whoever broke into the house was someone that knew about the events the night of the cult. Now the only people that we know of that know of what was going down there was Ciel, Sebastian and possibly one other person. This one other person may have been Blavat. We don’t know anything about his past but what we have gleaned so far is that he’s someone that knows how to manage large events, and that he has money to spend on the concert hall and costumes. Has connections to Nina, and also has shown that he has religious devotion to the Blue Star given everything that he’s doing.

We also know that when he saw Ciel he was surprised to see him in the first place. As if he recognized him and Sebastian.

So could it be that Blavat had been someone like Joker and the Circus crew at one point. A person that had lost their way and was in need of care and compassion, and the person that took him in was a member? Or it could very well be that he was one of the people that was being held by the cult? Either way, he may have been out of range of the fire that night and saw Ciel and Sebastian. So could he have been the person to have told the baron how to build the room.

However I have to wonder about that Tummy thing. We’re all predisposed by now to assume it’s the ring. Clearly Yana wants us to think it’s the ring and Ciel seems to think it’s the ring or at least something akin to it. We’re also guessing that the warning was for Ciel, but what if that’s not the case.

Yes it was put in Ciel’s room but who would be the first to see it going in. Sebastian. Now the weird thing about the situation for me regarding the ring and the message, why would Polaris carve that into the wall? If Twin Ciel was dead at the moment, would he even realize the ring had been taken out of him? Assuming the Who means that he doesn’t know who did it, then why put it in Ciel’s room?

There’s another thing that it could be referring to, that being a soul. So let’s say for this moment that the twin is dead. No bringing him back. If I was a demon that had had wanted a meal, and Sebastian took my place, I would be rather unhappy. Remember Sebastian did say that he was a picky eater, and that souls are a full on meal for them.

 If Ciel’s soul is so unique that Sebastian, who is starving, is willing to wait for it, that’s a damn fine treat. Any demon would see this soul as a form of delicacy or candy. So that message may not be directly for Ciel that could be for Sebastian.

The other thing is that if they are gas lighting Ciel, then could it be rather than a normal human that has taken the form of Ciel’s twin, could that be a demon? Remember they can look however they want, and if that’s the case, then maybe the reason they were targeting Soma and Agni wasn’t because of Ciel, maybe it was because of Sebastian. If the demon saw how, or got an idea of Sebastian caring for others, it wouldn’t be too hard to think that maybe he or she saw an opportunity to hurt him by killing a human that he genuinely respected as punishment for his actions or slights that they felt. Taking on the form of Ciel would only magnify that feeling. And, again, if they can take any form, what’s to stop a Demon from taking on the form of the Earl?

“She’s really a marvel of technology, I won’t deny that.”

“Mmm….Yes. The others have their own unique machinery, but her? Her? She’s the most advanced of entire group. I swear, her functionality is so lifelike that I sometimes forget she’s not even human!”

“An understandable statement, but…”

“But what?”

“…But….I don’t think she’s supposed to be dripping blood like that.”

Sassy’s place 

Ok, a mi como me encanta SL cree a algunos animatronics de compañia, una empresa rival encargada de comida rapida y postres, robando asi lugar a FReddy’s y Circus Baby pizza world, Sassy estara acompañada de su crew para dominar la calle, uno de suss creadores Jasper Fate, quien trabajaba con william, y ahora terminan siendo rivales, pero Sassy no es del todo mala, tambien tuvo un pasado junto con sus compañeros, pero esto lo ocaciono William para arruinar el negocio, pero hasta ahora nadie se a enterado

Orbiting Human Circus Headcanon

Every year, the OHC crew hands out roses for the audience to throw on stage after the Valentine’s Day special. Rather than throw them out, Julian collects the roses and walks around the city handing them out to people in need. Some call him ‘The Little Cupid’ as love seems to follow behind him. So far, Julian has unknowingly lead to the start of sixteen relationships, nine engagements, and four marriages.

OK! So, I finally got this done! Well, more like I kept going and here I am with another monster. sooooo enjoy?

This is for @thatonefromthatthing as my second place winner!! And it’s only the first part ^^; I overwrote once again and the second art will be out by the end of the month, if not early April. So the fluff isn’t over till this is done basically xD


Summary: Keith always wanted to join the circus - something that most kids wouldn’t dream of, but for him, it was all he thought about. Going to a circus when he was younger was his drive, but it hadn’t been any kind of circus. It had been the Legendary Voltron Circus. Now that he was out of the foster system, he set to finding it, tracking it down to a small town in the middle of nowhere. After one show, it was all it took to rekindle the flame inside of him and make him join. He accomplished his dream, but he hadn’t counted on falling for the acrobat in blue along the way.

Word Count: 6388 (no comment)

AO3

[Part 1]


Keith adjusted the strap on his bag and took the key from the hotel hostess. This was his third town in a month and after driving all day, he was exhausted. For the past few years now, he’s been skipping from one town to the next, looking for a place to belong. But when you have some crazy interests that no one really gets, it makes it hard. He was still going, though, so that counts.

He mumbled a quick thanks and headed off to his room.

To tell the truth, he was only in this town for one reason, and if it weren’t for that, he would have skipped his town entirely. There was something here that caught his interest.

The Legendary Voltron Circus.

Keep reading

“Tightrope Walking” - Part 2

“Tightrope Walking” - Part 2

(Part 1)

My Masterlist - Here

Bruce Wayne x Reader - Romantic Relationship

Jim Gordon x Reader - Father/Daughter Relationship

Jerome Valeska x Reader - Past Friendship

Word Count: 2868

Key: Y/N = Your Name, L/N = Your Last Name, H/C = Your Hair Color, E/C = Your Eye Color

Warnings: Cursing, talk of murder

Summary: With the return of Jerome, it’s time for your boyfriend, Bruce, to finally hear about your past.  

Author’s Note: This is going to be a 4 or 5 part story, and I hope I can do it justice! Please be patient with me! These are also all going to be a bit lengthier, but I will try my best to not make them insanely long! I also made Bruce and the reader college aged. Not too old though. Maybe 17 or 18? I figured it would make more sense this way.

If you would like to be tagged in any of my future pieces (All Works, Specific Fandoms, or Specific Multi-Parts), please let me know! And as always, feedback is greatly appreciated!

<3

- DreaSaurusREX


4 years ago, you’re parents disappeared. They were times you heard them with people who were from the bad parts of town. You knew how bad the foster system would be, so you packed a backpack full of essentials and went on your own. It wasn’t until after you ran away that you found out just who your parents really were. They worked for one of the gang leaders in a city about an hour out from Gotham.

You didn’t really have any destination in mind. You just wandered for a while until you saw a flyer on a newsstand for Haly’s Circus. It was a traveling circus that was setting up for a weekend of shows at the local fairgrounds. You were able to crack into your parent’s lockbox and take some cash, so you weren’t worried about money yet. Why not go to the circus? Maybe it can be a movie moment where you actually run away with them.

You didn’t expect that last part to ring true.

Keep reading

lokilover75  asked:

I was wondering if Yana has given ages for the circus characters? I thought I remembered a post about it, but I can't seem to find it anywhere. Thank you for all the translations, your English is very good!

Thanks!!<3

Yes, some of the characters’ ages were mentioned in the manga/anime:

  • Joker: 25 years old (ch35)
  • Beast: 24 years old (BoC ep9)
  • Snake: 18~19 years old (Yana’s twitter)
  • Doll: 15 years old (BoC bonus chapter)

As for the rest of the crew, their ages are uncertain afaik, but I guess Dagger is around 20-23 because he calls Beast “(big) sis” and Joker “senpai”. Peter and Wendy must be in their late 30s or older since they called Sebastian, who is supposed to look like an adult guy around 30, “little boy” (also, everyone of the circus crew, including 25-year-old Joker, calls them “big sis/big bro”).

Orbiting Human Circus Headcanon

The PBC board gave the crew ugly sweaters as a holiday gift. Pierre gave his to Julian because his was too small (He would not be caught dead in it). Julian cried as it was the first new piece of clothing he had gotten in years. The next day Julian woke up to find ‘santa’ brought him several sets of shirts, pants, and socks, as well as a cashmere scarf

I broke down the security system of Circus Baby OwO anyone wanna join me to troll the Sister location Crew ? :33333
@sonicsega @itsmartusonic @kittietv @nvart1 @purplespring5 @purple-87 @loverpod153 @loser-who-draws-bad-art @brico1987drawing @marcosvargas97 @marisu300 @optimistictrash69 @ballora87 @m-h–fnaf68 @hellzombie136 @heartmeku @dreamnoteprincess @dark-queen-world-522 @darkmage10 @almitav-04 @alooooon @alpha-blu @cap-of-tea @enderfisher @foxodraw @floofeon @greenwolf231231 @i-am-macki @kimthebacon @carrotcakeme @minhvankaty224 @mobox87 @puppetpuppe @rubbishbin–trash @raditzthehairball @rangbundaanjai @rainbowfnafworldyousuck1 @tokachithewarrier2 @up-all-night-to-survive @vivimanga @strawberpie @sleepyartisiancocoa @stnltbg
And lots of more friends and followers :333333
Let’s Troll them up OuO !!!! 😈😇😈😇😈😇😈😇

Yana and editor K’s tweets about the Circus arc, Musical (2017) and GFantasy

Source: X, X

English translation:

Yana: 8 years have passed since I wrote the Circus arc. I’ve just remembered that while drawing it, I tried to elaborate on the theme “there are certain things that don’t turn out well no matter how hard you try” (which is actually an improper theme for the entertainment industry) as well as the theme of “the seemingly reversed right and wrong”. Even though Sebastian [a demon] is the main character of this series, all arcs of Kuroshitsuji are supposed to be a paean to human beings.


Yana: The Circus crew were mercilessly eliminated by the servants. You might feel sorry for them but actually, they came to kidnap [a child]. Be it the manga, anime or the musical, I received the feedback that people rather empathised with the Circus crew and thus felt distressed [by their fate]. I guess Sebastian and Ciel really must have looked like the bad guys. Though, actually, they’ve never really been good-hearted to begin with… (lol)

Editor K: That scene in the musical [version of the Circus Arc] where Sebastian and Ciel laugh at Joker, who has just threatened them [to kill anyone at the manor]… They had such “bad guys” vibes, I was really surprised!

Yana: Oh that scene! I’m so thankful to Mr. Furukawa [*Sebastian’s actor] and Mr. Uchikawa [*Ciel’s actor]. They looked very evil indeed (lol) I mean this as a genuine compliment, of course! In that moment Sebastian and Ciel were actually the heroes who punished the serial child kidnapper… …at least in that very moment…

Editor K: It was shocking to see how an adult and an actual child were laughing in the same evil way.


Yana: The Circus arc is an arc where even I as the author can’t judge who was right and who was bad. Back when it was serialized in the GFantasy magazine, anime season 1 was airing in full swing. I’m really grateful to Square Enix for greenlighting this story *under such circumstances. [*Note: Since the atmosphere in the Circus arc was much darker than in the anime, it could have led to confusion for the new audience who got into this series through the anime.]

Editor K: They immediately reject the slightest depiction of underwear, but on the other hand, give full approval to a dark plot like that in the Circus Arc. The GFantasy [editorial department] is such an interesting place, isn’t it?

Yana: Come to speak of it, the drawers and corsets which I always draw so enthusiastically have never been rejected either. GFantasy really is a nice place.

Editor K: Indeed!!


Yana: Sebastian might be amused by the human beings who fight to protect their own world, and laughing at them from a demon’s point of view in the current musical version of the Circus arc. However, in the animated movie of the Luxury Liner arc, which will be released in January next year, he’ll find himself rolling over the floor and vomiting blood due to his self-imposed challenge to maintain the aesthetic [of a butler], so please look forward to it, too. *advertises bluntly*


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♡Proofread by lovely @minacchin

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Such A Joker (9/?)

Part 8 http://jeromesxreader16.tumblr.com/post/149573674397/such-a-joker-8

“Hey there kiddo. What are you doing here this late? It’s 1 AM past your bed time.” Harvey asks looking at me. “Haha very funny. My dad asked me to come. Somethings about a circus murder.” “You gotta be kidding right?” He laughs, and as if on que the circus crew walks in still in full costume. “Hope you’re not afraid of clowns Harv.” I laugh and go get myself a cup of coffee to wake myself up. This is gonna be a long night.

As I’m about to question one of the clowns my father interrupts me. “(Y/n). Come here I want you to sit in on this one. Ben will take your place.” I nod and follow my father.

“Who is it?” “Jerome Valeska. He’s the woman’s son. God it must be hard. Losing someone like that.” “Yeah. Must be.” I say quietly. We walk into the room and see Jerome sitting at the table with tear streaks down his face, and red eyes. Aww if I didn’t know it was fake id cuddle him right there.

“Hello Jerome. This is my daughter (y/n) she’s training. Do you mind if she sits in?” Jerome sniffles and looks me up and down. “Of course not. It’s very nice to meet you (y/n).” He extends his hand out and I grasp it immediately. “Pleasure. I’m sorry about what happened to your mother.” He nods and sniffed again.

My father sits down across from Jerome. “Tell me about your mother Jerome.” Jerome shrugs looking miserable. “She’s my mother. What can I say? I love her. She’s perfect. Not a very good cook. Except for that.”

“Did she have any enemies? Someone with a grudge?” “No.” “Boyfriends?” “No.” My father tilts his head with raised brows. “No?” “She had lovers. Sex partners really, but not boyfriends. She didn’t want the commitment.”

My father starts naming off people that Lila had done the dirty with. “Any others?” My father asks. Jerome scrunched his brows. “Not any that I could put a name to.”

“How do you feel about your mothers love life?” Jerome tilts his head slightly as if it was a stupid question. “I feel fine about it. If not for my mothers love life I wouldn’t be here would I? Sex is a healthy human activity.” Jerome says looking at me for a split second. “Don’t you agree Ms. Gordon?” Ah shit what the hell J?! My father glances at me with a look that means give me the answers I want to hear.

“Uh yes.” My father looks at me with a harsher look. “I-i mean I’ve never experienced it personally, but you know…heath…class?” As my father looks as me with raised brows Jerome smirks at me winking.

“Do you have any other family?” My father asks turning back to Jerome. If looks could kill Jerome would have a minor bruise, but still. That was uncalled for.

“The circus is my family.” My father nods. “Well thank you Jerome. (Y/n) do you have any questions to ask?” “Um yes actually. I do.” My father nods and stands up and leaves to question another member.

“Heath class? Really?” He smiles and laughs a bit. “What was I gonna say? Oh yeah I have sex with Jerome all the time. It’s great. Totally healthy human activity.” “Well that sounds fine to me.” I roll my eyes sitting on his side of the desk. “You’re so full of yourself.” “Well sometimes I fill you up too doll.” I look behind me to see the blinds closed.

“Come here.” I pull Jerome by the collar of his shirt so his level with me. I quickly press his lips to mine. “My my my doll. A work place romance didn’t seem like your style. What would daddy say?” I run my hand down his chest and kissing down his neck. “He’d say you’ve been a naughty girl.” I say into his ear nipping at it.

He moans gripping my thighs. “Yes you have baby.”

I pull away hopping off the desk. “While I would love for you to show me just how bad I’ve been we don’t want to get caught. Come on. I’ll keep you company while the other finish up.” I say grabbing his hand and leading him out.

“I though the deal was we don’t know each other at all.” “Well looks like we just became friends then Mr. Valeska.” I say going up to the top level and sitting on the couch with Jerome.

We talked like we normally do. Him obviously making me laugh, but it looking like I was just comforting him from anyone on the outside.

His eyes still red and a tear slipping out every now and then to keep the sad orphan boy look. “(Y/n)? What are you doing?” I look to see my father hold files. “Just talking.” I say simply shrugging.

“Well it’s time for you to leave Jerome. You can certainly stay on the lower level with the rest of your friends.” Jerome stands up sniffing. “Yes. Of course Sir. It was very nice to spend time with you (y/n). Thank you. You look beautiful by the way.” I blush and look down forgetting my father standing literally 7 feet away.

I watched Jerome descend down the stairs wishing he could stay for much longer. “I don’t want you talking to him.” My eyes slide to my fathers. “What? Why? We’re friends.” “No (y/n). He’s a suspect in a murder investigation. You are not getting all cozy with anyone. Especially him.” I scoff and roll my eyes. “What happened to me being an adult? Hm? You said that what? Not even 12 hours ago.”

He slams his files on his desk. “Yes you’re an adult, but I will not let you befriend a suspect who is here for a investigation for his own mother. Go to your office.” “So now you’re grounding me? Making me stay in my office? What are you gonna lock the door from the outside too?” “(Y/n) please. Go!” I huff and go to my office in a fuss getting there as fast as I can. How dare he say that! He can’t make me do anything! I lay on the couch in my office and eventually fall asleep.

Originally posted by dont-forget-theromance

I know everyone is excited for Book of the Atlantic next year and trust me, I am too. But do you know what I’m really excited for?

THE DUB OF BOOK OF THE ATLANTIC

I MEAN THINK ABOUT IT, FUNIMATION GOT THE ORIGINAL DUB CREW ALL BACK TOGETHER FOR BOOK OF CIRCUS AND BOOK OF MURDER, WHY NOT BOOK OF THE ATLANTIC? I MEAN, JUST. IMAGINE. BRINA BALENCIA AND J. MICHAEL TATUM DOING PANIC VOICE FOR HALF THE MOVIE. CHERAMI LEIGH DELIVERING LIZZY’S BADASS SPEECH. JOHN SWAESEY FINDING A SERIOUS VOICE FOR UNDERTAKER. DANIEL FREDRICK AND JOEL MCDONALD JUST SCREAMING THEIR HEADS OFF DURING THE BIG FIGHT. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

So you have just gotten busted by a superhero...

Look guys, we know what kind of world is out there. Aliens, magic, guys in power armor, all working without the authority of the criminal justice system. What should you do if you are busted by one of these costumed vigilante types?

  • Know your local super-types, their methods, powers and costumes. Knowing whether or not the cape in question is the kind that throws people off of buildings as opposed to the kind that just threatens to do so is extremely important.
  • Upon sighting a cape, do not run. About half of these guys can fly or have net-throwing arrows or similar weapons. This is doubly true if you live in a city with teleporters and people that can run faster than sound. Exception: If the vigilante in question is the killing-people variety (telltale signs: actually carrying a gun, metal claws or knives coming out of hands, large skull on chest, head is actually a skull engulfed in flames,etc.), just run, preferably faster than the rest of the members of your down-and-out circus troupe/heist team/race car pit crew/etc.
  • Do not engage in a physical altercation. If they don’t have physical powers they will probably be ninjas or own a robot suit or something. You will never get a lucky shot in on the Batman, don’t try. Discard your weapon, and make the following statement: “I am an ordinary citizen with no extraordinary abilities or weapons, I do not wish to engage in violence.” 
  • If you have a medical condition or have been transformed into a mutant, undead creature or were-something-or-other, announce your status. If offered a cure in exchange for assistance, request the presence of your GP and lawyer. 
  • Tell the superhero that you are not admitting guilt and you will wait for law enforcement and your lawyer and then state plainly that you do not consent to any search of your body or mind. Do not say anything else. Some municipalities have corrupt police forces that are in league with super-powered vigilantes and will use information given to capes against you. 
  • When dealing with capes of the opposite (or same, whatever you’re into) sex, do not attempt to catcall, seduce or innuendo your way out of it, no matter how tight or sparse their costume is. Not only will it not work but it is a sleazy thing to do. If the cape comes on to you, politely decline. 
  • Studies show that attempting to deflect a cape’s interrogation by mentioning that you are more frightened of your employer than the cape increases your chance of being killed by your employer right then and there by 430%. 
  • Do not use the lawyer provided to you by anyone who allegedly paid or coerced you into taking criminal action. If they aren’t there to silence you the cape will just come for you again once you make bail.
  • Remember, telepathy, confessions obtained through violent or magical coercion and the testimony of time travelers (now-deceased or as-of-yet-unborn), mystical beings, sapient animal-mutants and the undead are all inadmissible in a court of law.