the blue snog box

Series callback (1) From a Snogging Booth to a Shared Future, Their Big Blue Box.

“The TARDIS is outside. All of time and all of space, is sitting out there. A big blue box. Please, don’t even argue.”

What happened in the end of Last Christmas was certainly a proposal, and a proper one. When the Doctor came to Clara for the first time after waking up from the sleigh dream, he might just want to make sure she was also awake and safe. Instead, he found she was in her very last years, still missing him.

Later in the old Clara dream, they talked about whether she was married. In that moment, after the Doctor mentioned the idea of regret, and old Clara realized there were not much time left (“I just wish there were time for a few more.”), she confessed her feelings. Unlike the “I love you.” in the end of Mummy on the Orient Express, she finally said it, in the way that he could hear, and he could understand. He was always her impossible man. She was always in love with him, hopelessly.

I still can’t get over the look Peter gave us audiences, when the Doctor helped old Clara to open the Christmas cracker. Full of regrets.

“I’m sorry. I was stupid. I should have come back earlier. I wish that I had.”

He was sorry for didn’t realize what Clara said to him in the end of Death in Heaven was a lie. He should have come back for her earlier. Maybe, taking “Come Back Home” as a metaphor of finding one’s identity continued through this series, he was also sorry for the “I am not your boyfriend” thing when he suffered from the identity crisis. He should have come back for her earlier.

Then, they were given the second chance. With Clara checking her appearance in a mirror (cf. what 12th Doctor did in Deep Breath and all through this series.), the Doctor asked, trembling and firmly at the same time, if she would like to share all of time and space with him again. His word came right after their conversation about her marriage and her impossible love toward him. In this particular context, the offer was certainly a proposal.

When Clara (as herself) first met the Doctor in The Bells of Saint John, 11th offered her “Anywhere. All of time and space, right outside those doors.” A series of date-like lovely adventures he promised. Now, the big blue box outside her room, contained all of time and space they might had lost if they really parted from each other. He’s literally begging her. Don’t lose those treasure again. Their time, their space, their stars and universes. All those impossible possibilities in their future.

“I never get a second chance, so what happened this time?”