For cishet black men 4:44 was a Godsend. For the rest of the black population, however, 4:44 a curse. Almost immediately, a man who presented himself as feminist and activist posted a tweet thread about the pain and restrictions black men experience growing up, and how black women needed to be patient with black men who are still learning. When multiple black women responded that black women grow up under the same conditions with equal or greater constraints on emotional display, he gaslit and dismissed them. This is exactly what I feared. This is The 4:44 Effect in action, cishet black men sobbing about the emotional/empathic growing pains while expecting grace that was never afforded to black women. All the while, these same black men continue to “learn” by harming and discarding black women. They continue to learn by ostracizing queer black men, but then want easy access to the emotional spaces queer black men were beaten for entering. Cishet black men want the applause for finally gaining emotional depth that the rest of the black community had to develop as children for our safety and their comfort. The 4:44 Effect, I fear, will be particularly toxic in spaces once considered safe for black women. Cishet black male allies can can now dodge accountability under the guise of “still learning”. They can berate black women for not being impressed or wooed by their juvenile grasp on emotional intelligence. They can berate queer black people for not graciously allowing their casual queerantagonism because that’s “how I was raised.” The bar wasn’t raised, it was just repainted. Jay-Z and the other men in the Footnotes, in all their blissful enlightened ignorance, don’t realize the pandora’s box they’ve opened on the people they claim to now care about.
I had a vivid dream that Bart canonically got a boyfriend on The Simpsons and it was a big deal all over social media… but the thing was that in the show Bart’s boyfriend was a kid in a full-body opossum fursuit and not even Bart knew his real identity. Finally at the end of the season it turned out to be Milhouse, who dramatically unzipped the suit and said “Bart… I’m your opossum boyfriend”
And then they just kept dating but Milhouse STILL kept the opossum fursuit on
How on earth did you guys survive summers without air conditioning? Mine went out two days ago and I'm about five minutes away from giving myself an ice cube enema just to make it through the heat.
it wasnt fun, thats for sure. though i’ll admit i never quite got to the point where that sounded like a good idea.
mostly we acclimated–humans do this neat thing where our bodies can adapt to hot environments, but nowadays people just jump from air conditioned environment to air conditioned environment and dont build up that tolerance by staying in the heat. but back then, we just got used to it. that only goes so far though.
the summer of 1936 was a nasty one. i mean, horribly, terribly, melt your bones hot. nobody wanted to do anything, it was just so hot. the whole city just wanted to find a shady spot and lie still until the heatwave passed. people who had fire escapes off their apartments would sleep on them at night, so they wouldn’t have to be indoors, where it was even hotter and there was no moving air. neighborhoods broke open fire hydrants and cooled off that way–i once saw a man in a three piece business suit walk right into the spray from a hydrant, looking blissful as anything. some people carried umbrellas or parasols. people found bodies of water and got in them–rivers, ponds, public fountains, which was neither safe nor sanitary. places that sold cold drinks were packed, and vendors selling shaved ice on the streets sold out.
but the best thing was the pools. that summer, the WPA opened 11 enormous new public outdoor swimming pools across the city. back then, they were the peak of technology. four of them were in brooklyn, and stevie and i tried out all of them. it was the social site of the season, so i was in fine form.
it was great–stevie could swim pretty well, despite not having much muscle mass, and the chemicals didnt bother his asthma too much. whenever the two of us werent working, we were at one of those pools. really, it seemed like most of the city was in the water trying to cool off.
one thing we didn’t have? sunscreen. that wasn’t really around until the war. im a bit darker than steve, and even i was lobster red after the first few days. i made it work–red is my color.
stevie, though. steve was so red he could stop traffic.
The 11th House Cusp is associate with friendships, social circles, groups, communities, and goals/objectives.
Aries in 11th House: Your actions are influenced by your groups or social circles. You may feel like the leader of your group, or like a leader in originality even if no one follows you. You are active with your friends and have a lot of friends in your group, but have few close relationships.
Taurus in 11th House: You have more materialistic goals and objectives, and your friend may share those objectives. Your friends are artistically inclined and you may feel influenced by them to buy things or to indulge yourself. You are nostalgic and sentimental with your social group and you like to maintain those relationships, you like to go out with them quite often.
Gemini in 11th House: You easily attract social groups and friendships, and you like to be part of them. Your social interactions are filled with conversation, especially with intellectual topics. Your thoughts and opinions are influenced by your social groups. You entertain your friend group with stories and have a lively sense of humor.
Cancer in 11th House: You are cautious of new people, and the friends and social groups you do make, you keep for life. You are attached to them and have a deep emotional bond with them. You look to them for nurture and guidance, and are sensitive to their needs.
Leo in 11th House: You have a leadership role in your friendships, but you don’t overly dominate or control them. You have very close and deep friendships and groups, you gain your strength, inspiration, and creativity from them. Your friends have unique expressions or may have higher status.
Virgo in 11th House: You are serving and giving to others, and you love to help your community. You go to them for motivation and you like to keep plans or make plans with them. You pay attention to little details for them and try to make their lives easier. You prefer to associate with proper, well mannered people.
Libra in 11th House: You are graceful and diplomatic with your friends, you keep the peace. You find relaxation with them, you feel at ease. You may share friends with your partner or love interest. You may even stick to friends too long or hold onto old friendships. You deal with situations with ease and you lead your groups easily.
Scorpio in 11th House: You have very few close friends and those interactions are full of intensity and emotion. They help you face your fears and become vulnerable, you have deep trust with them. You don’t prefer to deal with people or situations and keep to yourself, but you care deeply for your group.
Sagittarius in 11th House: You have a wide range of friends and you all have different beliefs and interests. You all like to discuss these interests and ideas, and you enjoy their company. You explore new ideas and the world with them. But you still enjoy your independence and freedom.
Capricorn in 11th House: You like to keep your groups and social circles small and limited. You hate crowds and big social situations, and prefer one on one interactions. You aren’t good at teamwork and cooperation, and you prefer to work alone. You may even socialize with people with big influence or status.
Aquarius in 11th House: You are outgoing and social, and you easily fit into groups and organizations. You like to be friends with interesting and intriguing people, you like to have fun conversations and interactions. But you are also heavily influenced by your friends and interactions.
Pisces in 11th House: You are a very compassionate friend who would do anything for them. You expect the same back, and you like to have deep, emotional bonds. You have a very positive outlook on your groups, but aren’t quick to realize their faults or look away from them. You may be prone to following them blindly, without much thought. But you care for them deeply and love them completely.