the big macho man

  • Tamatoa: so here you go baby, Tamatoa au-natural! Your plan, she's worked to perfection!
  • Y/n: my plan to get you alone in a swim suit?
  • Tamatoa: come clean my lovely and play your cards straight. These are dangerous waters and I'm a big... strong...macho, macho man!
  • Y/n: Ok, first. Get over yourself.
  • Y/n: second, I mean it! Get OVER yourself.

It still cracks me up whenever I see someone portray Achilles as this big and beefy macho guy like…

My man, my dude, my historically inaccurate friend, to hide from the Trojan war Achilles literally disguised himself as a girl (as in full on crossdressing and living with the daughters of Lycomedes) and PEOPLE COULDN’T PICK HIM OUT AMONG THEM! 

I mean, Odysseus had to literally trick him into revealing his own identity! One version says he came to Skyros disguised as a peddler and sold jewelry and shit but also had a spear and shield and recognized Achilles because the dolt picked that instead of something else, while another says he staged an alarm and Achilles jumped into battle stance instead of running like everyone else (dude was always ready to fight everyone, I shit you not).

Achilles was more than likely NOT the big and beefy macho guy but a (probably rather) short, slender and extremely pretty boy who knew how to kick some serious ass and how to rock a dress at the same time. 

Also Plato, Aeschines and Aeschylus were convinced he and Patroclus were gay (Plato goes so far as to make them divinely approved) while Phaedrus basically said  Aeschylus was full of shit for making Achilles top because he was OBVIOUSLY prettier and younger and thus DEFINITELY bottomed. 

I love Greek mythology. 

the signs as syzygy
  • aries: chunky baby ryan reynolds
  • taurus: "i doubt she's even a blonde."
  • gemini: the movie on every tv channel
  • cancer: orange juice concentrate + vodka
  • leo: a cosmic g-spot
  • virgo: garage spring to the gut
  • libra: "shut up, mulder."
  • scorpio: scully smoking
  • sagittarius: the horned beast
  • capricorn: "sure. fine. whatever."
  • aquarius: the guy, the big macho man
  • pisces: "hate him! wouldn't want to date him!"

anonymous asked:

Let's say that there's an AU a really bad one Like super bad love triangle cliche With either marinette or bridgette as the heroine With twins felix and adrien as the leading men What do you think will happen?

Bridgette loves Felix

Felix loves Marinette

Marinette loves Adrien

Adrien loves Bridgette

With just Mari and the twins?

Mari loves Adrien

Felix loves Mari

Mari is Felix’s best friend

Felix and Adrien get into a big macho man fight, then realize that family is more important than a girl, and that if Mari actually loves them she wouldn’t want them to fight.

Adrienette happens and Felix finds himself a nice cat.

  • Sakura: Why do you always have to drive?!
  • Sakura: Because you're the guy?
  • Sakura: Because you're the big macho man?
  • Nozaki: No.
  • Nozaki: I was just never sure your little feet could reach the pedals.
  • Sakura: [Just stares at him]

so i was looking through my pre-orders on amazon and for some reason i got the urge to read some of the reviews for season 3 of vikings and i came across this one:

and then this response to it:

and i don’t know what i’m more amused by, the person who is appalled that a big macho man is actually something other than heterosexual and is actually capable of experiencing normal human emotions like grief when they lose someone they love dearly, or the dudebro who acknowledges that dudes can in fact have emotions but NO HOMO MAN NO HOMO