the big four confession

Ficlet for daeviliges’ prompt:

“I know it’s a heavy topic but maybe a little one-shot writing about transgirl!Cas having a not so nice day with her body but Dean cheering her up with his love to her <3”

It’s the first time I tried writing trans!Cas so I’m insecure. I’m also not sure how to tag it. I’m open for criticism and/or suggestions! :3

Also on AO3

When Cas was holed up in her study Dean knew that it was a sure sign that she was having a bad day. Bad days were not uncommon, but they had fortunately decreased in frequency over time. In the 5 years they’d been together, Dean had learned that Cas was not looking for easy solutions (and probably no longer believed in easy solutions) but what she could use was support. Dean had been awkward around her at first when he saw her crying, sitting hunched over a cup of long cold tea, almost not getting any words out when Dean asked her what was wrong.

“I am wrong.”

Seeing Castiel, strong, compassionate, amazing Castiel doubting herself, crying, wishing that she had never started transitioning because it had led her into some sort of chimera state of wrongness had been terrifying. And Dean hadn’t handled it well back then; blundering through some platitudes about insides that counted that only made her cry harder about not having the right insides being the problem.

Dean had retreated with his tail tugged between his legs, called Castiel’s sister and apologized later on for not being the kind of supportive boyfriend that Cas would have needed.

Now, five years later, he knew better.

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