the best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others

for a lot of us, it seems nearly impossible to find a balance between our grades and our health. i’ve created a list of tips and resources for managing classwork as well as mental illness. i tried to be inclusive of depression and anxiety as well as other disorders like adhd and bipolar. (i’d like to be more inclusive of others, but i couldn’t find a lot of resources and wasn’t sure what would help aaaa)

please let me know if you have anything to add, and i hope this post can help you out in some way c:

while studying

  • create a routine, and do your best to stick to it. having a consistent schedule can be a struggle, especially when dealing with long days of class or difficulties with sleep. try something more open-ended and flexible if you can’t manage specific times. (studying for an hour in the morning and before bed vs studying at 8 am and 10 pm)
  • start with your favourite subject. there are a lot of suggestions on how to start a study session (and they usually conflict it seems), but i’ve found that this works best for me. your favourite subject may be easy or difficult, but by starting with it, you get in the groove of studying and won’t get burnt out as quickly, giving you more energy to do your other work.
  • don’t take on more than what you can handle. if you’re feeling motivated, great! get as much done as you can! but on the bad days, just do what you can. there are times where it seems nearly impossible to get anything done, but still try to make the most out of each day and do what you’re able to so you don’t fall far behind. do what you can, when you can. don’t overwork yourself so much.

during class

  • take notes. for me, the easiest way to lose track during a class is if i don’t write or doodle. even if the material doesn’t seem important, write it down! it may be useful later, and it’ll keep your mind from wandering during lecture. (that being said, don’t always write things exactly as the teacher says; putting it into your own words can make it easier to remember and understand)
  • record lecture audio. if you can’t copy everything down in time, or if for whatever reason you need to know something verbatim, then you’ll have something to listen to again later.
  • take pics of what the instructor writes on the board. similar to the above tip, you can refer back to the pictures you took. just don’t forget about them! write yourself a note or make an alarm on your phone to remind you that there’s more material to review. don’t be the kid who takes pictures during the whole lecture but never writes anything, that kid’s obnoxious and gets bad grades
  • stay focused. i fidget a lot with my hands and feet, especially during a long lecture or study session. i find that keeping my hand on my pen/pencil is the simplest way to keep my mind on track, but fidget toys may help you as well. most teachers and students are fine with it as long as it’s not too disruptive.

at home

  • keep track of medication. ngl i am suuuper forgetful when it comes to medication :’) if you’re forgetful too, leave yourself as many reminders as you can. set alarms, write notes, or have someone else keep you accountable if you’re living with a parent or roommate. having routine helps here as well, especially if you take meds multiple times a day.
  • communicate regularly with your doctor. if you’re living away from home, or just a busy student, it can be particularly difficult to make appointments. but you should still make an effort to email your doctor, therapist, etc. at least once a month, and more often if you’re currently changing or adjusting medications.
  • “catching up” on sleep is a myth. depriving yourself of sleep during the week and then sleeping in on the weekends won’t fix your sleep schedule, sadly. keep it consistent if you can. even if you’re staying up late and sleeping in, try to get at least 7-8 hours. whether it’s 12-8 am or 2-10 am, it’s a reasonable amount for getting through the day. sleeping too little can leave you tired and grumpy in the morning, but sleeping too much can also leave you groggy, sluggish, and unproductive for the rest of the day.
  • eat something healthy. okay, no one can eat healthy all the time, and i don’t expect you to. i certainly don’t expect myself to lol. but we can still find a healthy snack or meal to make a part of our lives. sometimes fruit is the best comfort food tbh. here are a few simple snacks that you could try, for studying or for whatever else. i personally enjoy anything with berries, especially yogurt parfait or oatmeal.
  • have a support system. it helps so much to have someone you can talk to when you’re not feeling well or in need of encouragement. it can be a friend, a parent, a sibling, your significant other, or even other members of the studyblr community! (if you don’t have anyone to talk to, please talk to me!! i am here for you my friendo)

other stuff

  • community college by @universi-tea - if you’re worried about moving into dorms or away from home (or are simply unable to), i strongly encourage you to try out community college. it’s made schooling much more enjoyable and accessible for me and i think everyone should give it a chance. plus it’s waaay cheaper.
    • also, most (if not all) U.S. schools have a disability services department; this applies to both physical and mental illnesses. talking to them for the first time can be nerve-wracking, but in the long run it’s completely worth it. teachers and staff want to help you! but you have to help yourself a lil bit too. accommodations may include leniency about attendance and deadlines, or they may let you take exams on earlier or later dates with fewer students present. the flexibility with deadlines has saved my ass more than once tbh
  • things to do when things don’t feel right by @affectionsuggestions - sometimes it’s okay to just do small things, and sometimes it’s okay to not do anything at all.
  • ways to start feeling again by @urbanthropologie - similar to above, but with a focus on mindfulness (helps with anxiety, dissociation, etc)
  • my mental illness tag - this has many other resources that are otherwise not listed in this post.
  • my printables tag! - printables are great for when you’re too tired or not sure how to write things out completely by hand. there are some planners and calendars as well as gratitude logs, habit trackers, etc.
  • i have tons of other tags listed here if you need anything more specific :>

thank you for reading! i hope you found some of these tips helpful. i believe in you!!

scandal sentence starters aka lots of angst, sex, and murder.

send one for my muses reaction! Feel free to change any gender or anything that needs changing in order for it to make sense to have come from your muse.

It’s only day 2 for this shirt, and these panties are fresh from the dryer. ❞
I don’t need you to forgive me. I haven’t done anything wrong. ❞
I’ve always forgiven you until now. ❞
I can never tell if you’re lying. I can never trust my gut when it comes to you. ❞
Are you spying on me? You don’t trust me? ❞
How do I choose the box to bury my friend in? ❞
If he dies, he can’t talk. Dead men tell no tales. ❞
When you walk in here, you make me hope. Hoping is bad for me, so do not come back here unless you are back for good. ❞
When it’s your turn, you can talk, but right now, be quiet. Let yourself be kissed. ❞
It’s always his turn, despite the fact that I’m the one you like to ride, that I’m the one that makes you moan, that I’m the one who reaches you in places that he can’t begin to touch. ❞
We can hide in the shadows or we can stand in the light. ❞
I’m not gonna live in your apartment, waiting to service you. I have things to do. I’m busy. But, I did book a nice hotel suite for booty calls. ❞
Do you actually think I give a damn what anyone thinks of me anymore? ❞
A broken heart is a broken heart; to take a measure is cruelty. ❞
You can’t summon me. You are not in charge of me. ❞
Did you think I’d want you back? ❞
I am less than interested in whatever it is you have to offer. ❞
You thought I would be dragged in here and I’d lay eyes on you and I’d gasp, and I’d rip off all my clothes and crawl on my knees over to you and beg you to take me, that I’d be some kind of sad porn fantasy. ❞
I could have anything I wanted, and I wanted you. You can laugh at it and make fun of me, but the truth is, nobody else wants you. ❞
I’ve lost too much. I’ve given up too much. I’m not even a person anymore. ❞
I’m not like you. I’m sorry you miss me, but I’m not like you. ❞
Why are you picking a fight with me today? ❞
You’re thirsty, but you’re not here for a drink.❞
You’re here because you want what you’ve been fantasizing about ever since you left the other night. ❞
I can give you what you want just the way you want it. ❞
You either go home alone and try your own hand at quenching that thirst or go upstairs with me and replace that dry lump in your throat with something much more satisfying. ❞
Trust me; I will be the one standing over you when you die. ❞
You keep secrets from me. You make me feel small. ❞
Burying yourself in work isn’t always the best thing when you lose someone. ❞
I’ve got enough blood on my hands already. ❞
Don’t ever leave me like that again. I almost didn’t survive. I almost died without you. ❞
You have been waiting for this moment from the second I got in bed with her. ❞
It doesn’t matter what the truth is, does it? The only thing that matters is that I put my hands where you think they don’t belong, and now I’m in chains. ❞
I am going to have you destroyed. ❞
He’s a predator, an animal, a killing machine, and just because you’ve decided to turn a blind eye to that doesn’t make it any less true. ❞
I think you want me to be guilty. Guilty lets you hate me for things you’re not allowed to hate me for. ❞
If there’s any part of you, any part of you at all, that believes that I’m telling you the truth, you’ll help me. ❞
You may have never heard what it sounds like when she wakes up screaming from a nightmare, but I have, and it’s awful. ❞
The truth is like the sun. You can shut it out for a while, but it’s not gonna go away. ❞
Since us bitches have got to get through this dog and pony show, I’m gonna need you to sit down, shut up, and follow my lead. ❞
Is she right about you having nightmares? ❞
Don’t let love cloud your judgment. ❞
We both know in the end you’re not going to choose me. And that’s okay. I want you to know, I need you to know, not choosing me is okay. ❞
I keep my promises. I will watch the life fade from your eyes. ❞
I love her. Does that matter to you at all? ❞
It stops you every time, the arrogance, the need to swagger, to show everyone who you are. ❞
True power hides in plain sight. ❞
You and I are ruined. We don’t have a chance now. Too much has happened. ❞
I know you’re trying to be rational, and I understand why, but you can’t pretend this is okay. ❞
I mean, I figure we have two choices here - we can either pretend this unbearable sexual tension doesn’t exist, or we can address it head-on. ❞
You are beautiful. The face that launched a thousand ships. ❞
What is it that is so special about you? You have so much power over him. He revolves around you. ❞
He needed you. He was in pain. He wanted to die. ❞
I could protect him from everyone. Except you. ❞
I wanted to shoot him. I didn’t, but I wanted to. I wanted to kill him. I wanted him dead. ❞
I’m very powerful, you know. Some women would find that a turn-on. ❞
Let’s just say I’m in a giving mood tonight. ❞

The Road To Good Grades

[Warning - A Very Lengthy Post]

A fellow student of mine wrote this when for my batch when we entered high school, and I thought I should share it with you ❤️ it’s been edited to make it more universal to you guys :D

Intro: Having the Courage to Study.
When we fail academically, we tend to point to two causes: stupidity and laziness. It’s so easy to say that we’re not smart enough, or that we just don’t want to try because it doesn’t really matter. But there’s another factor involved: fear. So many students have the strategy of not studying or not studying properly for an exam. Why? Because if you put low effort into something, then you should expect a low result. So many of us are afraid of trying and failing that we don’t even try. “What if my best isn’t good enough?” We’re afraid of giving our best because once we know our limits, we feel that much weaker. But life in school isn’t about not trying, it’s about accepting those limits and breaking them.To survive and ultimately thrive, you must have the courage to reach your full potential.That courage, that vigor, that strive to be better is what will keep you alive, not just in school but in the real world.

Guide:
- Sleep and Eat well.
We often lose sleep or skip meals in order to survive the rigors of life.But keep in mind, those choices in the rest and nourishment you receive have consequences. Having the energy to focus throughout the day is vital. Nobody wants to be tired, nobody can afford to be sick.

- Pay Attention in Class.
There’s a difference between passive hearing and active listening. Letting the teacher’s words wash over you like a warm shower is NOT the same as paying attention. Teachers are human beings, capable of expressing emotion and emphasis in their words and actions. There’s a reason why you learn from them rather than from a book or the internet. Catching what they’re trying to say is a skill that takes effort to learn.

**The skill of listening is one of the most important ones to develop because a teacher’s words are your last resort in an examination. If a quiz catches you by surprise, your memory of the class is the difference between A+ and an F.

- Take USABLE Notes.
Normally, humans are not capable of memorizing lessons entirely in their head.That’s what notes are for. Keep in mind that notes should be USABLE, they are not things that you make for the sake of looking or feeling productive. Each person has a specific style of learning and their notes should reflect that. Notes that are too long/elaborate, too short/simple, unreadable, or illogical are detrimental. Good notes should be aids in studying, not justification for carrying notebooks.

**Tips:
- Save time by using abbreviations or acronyms.
- Rearrange/reconstruct words or phrases for convenience.
ex. Famous Authors of America –> Impt. American Authors.
- Avoid copying verbatim unless necessary (quotes).
- Write down examples, esp. in science/math related subjects.
- If notes are incomplete, supplement them via reliable sources or your teacher.

- Practice.
There is more to studying than reading/note-taking. Practice is essential. This is especially true for Math-related subjects. Reading your notes before a Math exam is not really going to help you understand the problem or protect you from careless mistakes. The only way to improve in the subject is by doing the exercises and learning from both your success and failure. Memorizing definitions isn’t as important as using them. Being able to analyze, compare, and contrast is vital to survival.

- Review a Little Bit, Regularly.
Slow and steady wins the race. Students tend to read a ton of material before an exam. However, the human mind requires time in order to fully grasp ideas and concepts. Taking 10-20 minutes to read your notes after school daily can help in memorizing lessons, understanding themes, and recalling important points. Taking every subject’s lessons day by day will prevent you from being overwhelmed.

**Tip:
- When reading through your notes, picture yourself in the classroom with your classmates and teacher. The human mind is like a web, connected by images and sounds. Doing so can help you recall things written on the board or things mentioned by the teacher.

- Learn to Plan and Cram.
Working for the long-term and rushing for the short-term are two opposing ends of the spectrum. But if you don’t master both, you will suffocate in requirements.Time and energy are limited resources and the best scholars know how to get the most out of them. You can’t expect to be able to plan assignments weeks or days in advance the same way you can’t expect to make “academic excellence” in 30 minutes or less like a pizza delivery service.

**Tips:
- Periodic Exams, Long Tests, and Projects REQUIRE planning and coordination.
- Teachers can take up to 5 minutes setting up. Exploit the time.
- Lunchbreak, and the 20 minute breaks are the normal “"cram periods”“.


- Don’t Think of Difficulty.
“Easy” and “Hard” are relative terms. They mean different things to different people and ultimately, they should mean nothing to you. Feeling scared of a “tough” exam is harmful, as is feeling smug about an “easy” one. Study well so you can approach every test with confidence. Remember: it’s just as possible to perfect a difficult test as it is to fail an easy one.

- Don’t Compare Yourself to Others.
The world has approx. 7 billion people. There are always going to be people who are better than you at a given skill, the same way that there will always be people who are worse. Don’t consider them. Your life is your battle, and you’re going to have to fight it for yourself. Being discouraged by your friends’ high scores is as illogical as being encouraged by their low scores. There’s no reason to be proud of 1/10, even if it’s the highest score in the whole class.

- Don’t Blame Teachers.
Not all of your teachers are going to be fair or good at their jobs, whether you like it or not. Regardless, you can’t control your teacher’s incompetence or harshness but you can control the effort you put into their class. Read in advance, find other of info sources, and predict their requirements. The odds may be against you, but as a student you’re expected to beat them.

- Consult.
There’s no shame in asking for help. If you have difficulty in a subject, it always helps to consult with a teacher. Not only does it help in resolving any misconceptions/mistakes, it shows that you’re willing to take the time and effort to do well. To most teachers, that spirit is just as important as the final grade. Note: if a teacher knows that you have difficulty in their subject, they’ll probably take note of it in class which may be to your benefit.

- Find Your Own Strategy/Work Smart.
No single study strategy works universally. Everyone has their own specific style of learning and it’s up to you to find yours. If skimming through readings works for you then go ahead. If you’re the kind that needs to take notes, fine. It’s all about working both hard and smart, giving the most energy but finding the most effective way of using it. Humans are creative creatures. You might find that the best solution is one that no one has thought of before.

- Be Liable.
You need to be proactive in academics. Many students have the tendency to be caught off guard by a surprise quiz. They’ll often argue with the teacher, using the retort “Ma'am, you didn’t announce it!” as an excuse. Shaking off responsibility through ignorance is suicidal in this school. If you’re willing to take the risk of coming to class unprepared for the sake of being lazy, go ahead. Just be prepared for the consequences of your actions.

- Keep Moving Forward.
You’re human. Humans make mistakes. Learn from your errors but leave them where they belong; in the past. Everyone wants to get an A+ but you’ll never go that far with the weight of your failure hanging over your shoulder.

Conclusion: Don’t Take Academics too Seriously.
It seems counter-intuitive to end this guide with a statement like “Don’t Take Academics Too Seriously” but it’s something that everyone should remember. No matter no hard you try, you will fail at something. You’ll reach an obstacle that will knock you down to the ground and it will hurt like hell. You need to have something to fall back; friends, family, a hobby, an interest, etc. You don’t want to graduate and realize that you’re only good at earning numbers in a system.You could graduate this high school with the highest average in history but it won’t matter to anyone if you don’t know how you got it. Life is just like math, it’s not all
about the final answer. Your solution is just as important.

**Ultimately, your success as a scholar isn’t measured by a number on a piece of paper but in the difference you make in people’s lives. We’re not going to carry facts and theorems with us, but an attitude of trying to give our best no matter what the cost. That’s the most important lesson you can ever learn in school, but you’re not going to learn it from one subject or teacher. You’re going to live it everyday through every requirement and every grade receive.

Lilith in Astrology

Lilith, to put it simply, is your subconscious bad bitch. But let’s start with where Lilith comes from. She comes from the Hebrew legend where Lilith was the original wife of Adam where she was made from the dust of the Earth just like him. She demanded equality, specifically sexual equality. When she didn’t receive that she left the Garden of Eden to pursue a life on her own. Becoming a she-demon where she had sex with other demons, causing demon children. Now I am by no means religious, but it is always good to know the story behind the name when it comes to astrology. For often that can help you understand the meaning of whatever placement. 

Through this story you can see that besides being a bit of a bad bitch, she represents feminine independence. She is about catering towards your honest needs. She is where you are rejected by others yet you fulfill that area for yourself. I feel like the house placement tells us where you feel powerless or where our inhibitions lie while the sign placement tells us how you enforce your personal power in compensation for those areas where you have inhibitions or have been rejected. Lilith is often seen as how we approach sexual power due to it’s origin story. And that is true, it is, but it is also much more. Beyond what I have already mentioned, Lilith is also the place in out charts where we feel vengeful, where we are willing to become as evil as the rest of humanity. It shows us where our darkness comes from, and where it is going to take us. 

Retrograde Lilith in a chart can show us where we are given power that we don’t want, or are too scared to use. Which can then lead to people with asteroid Lilith “retrograde can ultimately go critical like the uranium in a nuclear bomb.” Lilith in synastry can show us where another person reflects our own worst traits. Or where they’ll make us feel powerless. Of course, it could also show where we push our sexual desires on another person. Where Lilith is transiting in our chart can show us where we are currently feeling held back and where we are currently trying to compensate by conjuring up our own personal power. Lilith in our draconic chart can show us where we naturally felt inhibited, but through our own force and power we took control and gained strength in that area. Lilith in a man’s chart shows how he approaches powerful women or women who exert themselves over him. Or even how he approaches his own femininity. 

Note that not everyone has all that strong of a Lilith in their chart and they’re three different Liliths to check.

Natal Lilith placements 

Keep reading

in celebration of 3k followers! thank you guys smsmsmsm

gandhi

“the best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.”

“in a gentle way, you can shake the world.”

“if I had no sense of humor, I would long ago have committed suicide.”

“fear has its use but cowardice has none.”

“man can never be a woman’s equal in the spirit of selfless service with which nature has endowed her.”

“i am a humble but very earnest seeker after truth.”

oscar wilde

“we are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.”

“it is absurd to divide people into good or bad. people are either charming or tedious.”

“i am not young enough to know everything.”

“if one cannot enjoy reading a book over and over again, there is no use in reading it at all.”

helen keller

“never bend your head. always hold it high. look the world straight in the eye.”

“although the world is full of suffering, it is also full of the overcoming of it.”

“it is a terrible thing to see and have no vision.”

“my share of the work may be limited, but the fact that it is work makes it precious.”

“keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see a shadow.”

stephen hawking

“look up at the stars and not down at your feet. try to make sense of what you see, and wonder about what makes the universe exist. be curious.”

“people won’t have time for you if you are always angry or complaining.”

“the past, like the future, is indefinite and exists only as a spectrum of possibilities.”

“we should seek the greatest value of our action.”

“my goal is simple. it is a complete understanding of the universe, why it is as it is and why it exists at all.”

ayn rand

“the question isn’t who is going to let me; it’s who is going to stop me.”

“when I die, I hope I go to heaven, whatever the hell that is.”

“to say ‘I love you’ one must be able to first say the ‘I’.”

plato

“you can discover more about a person in an hour of play than in a year of conversation.”

“courage is not knowing what to fear.”

“there is no harm in repeating a good thing.”

“music is a moral law. it gives soul to the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination, and charm and gaiety to life and everything.”

empressfortuna  asked:

Do you have any advice for someone putting together an RPG system for fun and to maybe play with friends? It's something I've started a couple of times (and I have a concept I really like sitting around that I'd like to try to flesh out into a system at some point), but I'm interested in what advice an industry professional has for an amateur.

Sure thing:

1. Start small.

If you’re an author, you don’t write the next Game of Thrones as your very first work, and if you’re a game designer, you don’t go straight to writing the next Dungeons & Dragons.

A good target for a beginning designer is a game that can be set forth in about 5000 words - i.e., basically a sixteen-page pamphlet if you’re aiming for print publication. Have a look at other very short RPGs to get a feel for what the minimal set of stuff you need to include is. Good examples include:

Several of these look like they break my length guideline, but that’s because they include introductory fiction, sample adventures, GM advice sections, etc. Ignore all that for now - zero in on the rules themselves.

2. Start with premise.

Not setting, not mechanics - if you start with those, you’ll end up with a collection of neat worldbuilding bits and dice-rolling tricks that don’t actually add up to anything.

Have a clear idea in your head of what the prototypical session of your game, the Platonic ideal of an adventure, looks like from beginning to end, and ensure that all of the material you write - rules, setting, etc. - directly supports that premise. You can branch out later, but it’s absolutely critical that you get that core right first. If you’re not sure whether a given piece of material directly supports that core? It probably doesn’t - lose it.

3. Outline, outline, outline.

Resist the urge to just leap in and start writing. You can note stuff down for later if you want (see point 5, below), but if you just start writing, at best you’re going to end up with a disorganised mess; at worst, you’ll become irresolvably stuck when you run into some critical aspect of your premise that you haven’t thought about yet.

Good organisation is much more important in game rules than it is in prose fiction, so effort spent here pays off huge later. A good game outline should ideally drill all the way down to what you plan to talk about in each individual paragraph. Use headings and subheadings if you have to. When you’re finished, you should be able to start writing your game simply by picking a portion of your outline and filling it in.

4. Give yourself deadlines.

This is the corollary of point 1, above. Even within a work of limited scope, it’s easy to iterate forever and never get anywhere, or to turn things over and over in your head without ever committing it to writing until all your enthusiasm for it dribbles away. Your first RPG should take no more than a couple of weeks to write; make time to work on it every day during that span.

(In fact, writing a complete RPG of this scope in a single day is an exercise that a lot of designers use to keep themselves sharp. You can Google “24 hour RPG” for numerous examples. Do not attempt to do this as your very first game, of course - it’s basically hard mode game design.)

5. Take notes.

Once you’re in the game-creating headspace, neat ideas on how to address various bits of your premise will be occurring to you at all hours of the day. If you have school or a day job, it’ll often be at times when you can’t drop everything to chase after the idea in question. You may be confident that you’ll remember it for later. You will not. Keep a notebook or a tablet on hand so that you can jot stuff down as it occurs to you.

6. Be a dictator.

Don’t be afraid to tell people how they ought to play the game. Some folks will tell you that this is bad design. These people are wrong. All game rules encode assumptions about how the game ought to be played; some games are merely more honest about it than others. You’ll save yourself a heap of trouble by being one of the honest ones.

7. Beta readers. Lots of ‘em.

This ties into the preceding point: as you write, you’re going to be making a vast array of assumptions about how the game ought to be played and how the rules are supposed to be executed. Many of these assumptions will seem so obvious to you that it wouldn’t occur to you to write them down, or will be so deeply embedded in your thinking about the game that you don’t even realise you’re making them.

The ability to step back and go “okay, what assumptions am I making about the player’s understanding and prior knowledge, and are these assumptions warranted?” is a skill. Unless you’re a technical writer or something in your day job, you do not yet possess this skill. The upshot is that your first attempt at a game (and your second, and your third…) will be incomprehensible to anyone who’s not you.

This doesn’t mean you’re a bad game designer. It does, however, mean that you need to get as many sets of eyes on your work as possible, and you need to respect and seriously consider the questions they ask, no matter how obvious the answers feel to you.

8. Never throw anything away.

You’re going to have many ideas that you can’t find a place for in your game. You’re going to have many more that you end up cutting because they turn out not to directly support your premise (see point 2, above). Don’t just delete them - keep a master document of your of unused ideas, preferably on Google Drive or another cloud-hosted service so it’s always accessible and impossible to accidentally lose.

Not only are you accumulating a store of material for future projects, but emotionally it’ll be a lot easier to give material you’ve put a lot of thought and work into the axe because it’s not working out in your current game when you can tell yourself that you’re not getting rid of it for good: you’re just not using it right now.

Goldilocks || 09

Rated T (language, violence, and suggestive content)

Warnings: abuse

Summary: After getting evicted, your two best friends Jimin and Taehyung offer you a place to stay until you get back on your feet. Needless to say, with a part time job and a mountain of student debt, that’s not happening any time soon. Eventually, they DO become really fond of having you around, helping with chores and even splitting rent. So when you come home one day to find someone has been sleeping in your couch-bed, well… it’s something you won’t take lightly.

Word Count: 4k

Out of context Goldilocks quote:
“No offense, but what a bitch.”

Links to: Goldilocks Masterlist || Previous || Next Part

not my gif, credit to owner

✩✩✩♔✩✩✩

Part 9:

Taehyung kicks the door open so hard that it swings, hits the wall, swings back, and hits him in the arm.

“I’m hOOOOoooOOOoome,” he sings, throwing down his backpack to scoop up the first unfortunate soul that crosses his path and spin them around happily. This unfortunate person happens to be Jimin.

“Tae-hyung-let-me-go,” each of Jimin’s syllables are emphasized as the younger boy starts bouncing, arms tightening and cutting off Jimin’s air supply.

“No can do, brother,” Taehyung smiles, giving your mutual friend a visibly tight squeeze. “I’m celebrating and I need someone to hug.”

Your eyes narrow as you go through your checklist. Not his birthday. Not Christmas. And you aren’t really obligated to get him anything for other holidays so… you turn off the mental panic alarm.

“What are you celebrating?” you ask.

“I’ve decided to come to terms with our housemate.”

“Jungkook? Or Yoongi?”

“I’m not a housemate,” Yoongi calls from the kitchen. You want to tell him that he might as well realize that everyone that comes to this apartment has a history of staying, but you know arguing with Yoongi is like yelling at a wall.

Taehyung ignores him, “Neither! I’m talking about Poco.”

“Poco?” Jimin and you ask simultaneously.

“The spider. In the bathroom! I’ve decided to give it a name because naming something makes it less scary,” Taehyung replies, finally letting go of Jimin, who takes a few subtle steps back, breathing a sigh of relief.

“What if it already has a name?” you tease.

Too bad~ I’m naming it Poco because I don’t speak spider-”

A thud and the sound of falling half empty shampoo, body wash, and conditioner bottles bounces down the hall, then a muffled, “Stupid fucking spider.”

All three of you freeze, attention pinned on the bathroom door as it opens, revealing Jungkook with dripping hair and a towel wrapped hastily around his waist. He looks pissed.

You cup your hands over your mouth, calling after him, “Yah, Jungkook. Afraid of our little arachnid buddy?”

“No, noona,” he pauses before going into Jimin’s room, tone cold and challenging. “It startled me and I killed it.”

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Tarot Blogging What I Wish I Knew

Running a Tarot blog is such an interesting and rewarding experience. It can be used as a wonderful creative outlet where you can freely express yourself, meet like-minded people, grow and learn throughout your Tarot journey. Are you apprehensive about starting a Tarot blog or feeling a bit discouraged with your current one? Here are some things I wish I knew before starting my Tarot blog.

Dare To Be Different

I cannot stress the idea of daring to be different. When I first started my blog, I was met with many harsh comments and mean messages from other bloggers who wanted my blog gone. I was constantly told that the combination of tarot and prose was such a stupid idea and that they were tired of seeing my content in the tags. I blogged for myself for so long. I did my best to continue on my journey of blogging despite the discouragement I had and it was the best decision I have ever made.

Trust Yourself

You are going to grow and learn a lot about yourself as you blog and use Tarot. It is okay to step away from what others consider universal practices and challenge what you read or have been told. Your divination journey is yours and it is all about trial and error. There will be some people who may disagree with you, your practices and your process but that is perfectly okay. Do what feels right and trust yourself.

DeckLust Is Real

When you are a Tarot blogger, you will come across many beautiful Tarot and oracle decks that you may lust and love over. I wish I would have known how much my deck collection would grow being a Tarot blogger but I was not prepared. Make a #DeckLust wishlist to keep track of your deck wants. It has helped me so much.

The Follower Game

You won’t obtain thousands of followers overnight. It takes time for people to learn who you are, what you are about and if your blog and content is one they would like to follow. When I first started blogging it was difficult trying not to dictate the value of my blog and my content by the number of followers I had. I learned early on that my follower count shouldn’t be my driving factor of content creation and expression or I would be blogging for all the wrong reasons.

Mass Appeal

You cannot appeal to every single person that comes across your blog. You shouldn’t want to either. There are going to be people who like your content, and those who do not. Accepting that is the hard part. Embrace that you are wonderful just the way you are and focus on those who enjoy your content rather than those who do not.

Original Content

Creating original content is hard work. I spend hours upon hours writing, rewriting, revising, taking photos and photo editing before my content is ready to be posted. I love sharing my thoughts and unique flare in regards to Tarot and divination. Although creating original content can be difficult, I find it the most rewarding.

Social Media Is Your Friend

Social media has been my greatest asset in helping my blog grow. Utilizing social media networks like Facebook, Instagram and Twitter helps me to curate my original content and share my blog posts so those who are active on those platforms can find and view my content and hopefully share it.

Set A Schedule

Having a blogging and post schedule helps take a lot of the guess work from blogging. In the beginning, blogging can be a bit overwhelming but if you create a schedule that allows you to queue posts and curated content, you have more time to do other things like interacting with others.

The “Need” For A Shop

Running a shop to accompany your blog is serious business. You do not need to sell Tarot readings or divination services if you aren’t comfortable doing so. You do not need to open an online shop to accompany your blog to be considered a “real” Tarot reader. You do not need to open a shop to “prove yourself”. You are still a legitimate Tarot reader and blogger without it. Do not feel pressured to start selling readings if you are still trying to figure out your own Tarot journey.

Tarot Burnout

It is okay to take a break from your blog and put the Tarot decks away and take care of yourself. I wish I would have taken my own advice looking back. I was always on ‘go’ so to speak in the beginning and put my health and needs last.

Community Events And Divination Challenges

When I first started my Tarot blog I felt so alone. I didn’t really know many people. I strived to interact with others in the community the best way that I could. I started participating in tarot community events like Tinychat hangouts, rabb.it rooms, discord servers, and divination challenges hosted by my favorite bloggers. I’ve also joined Tarot Facebook groups, google hangouts and webinars about Tarot. This helped me meet lots of new people. Networking is so important.  If you are interested in weekly community events, I host some twice a week. More information HERE.

Making Friends And Losing Friends

You are going to meet some incredible and life long friends on your blogging journey. Once I started interacting with other bloggers on a regular basis, I began to form positive friendships that I could talk to about Tarot, divination and other blogging things. These people have helped me so much in my life and I owe it all to the wonderful Tarot and Divination communities of social media for bringing us together. Another sad truth I  wish I knew was that some friendships just don’t last. Whether it’s growing apart, having different interests, no longer liking one another anymore,  or one person being jealous over the other, etc. some friendships have the potential to be long lasting, others do not.

Legal Issues And Copyright

My first year as a Tarot blogger, there was a community-wide issue with legal uses of Tarot deck images and cards. This put a lot of bloggers in a sort of limbo, unsure if they could continue blogging, myself included. It is important to seek out deck and artist permissions for decks before using them on your blog or social media accounts, especially if you want to keep you and your blog safe legally.

Anonymous Bullying And Trolling

It is no secret that I have had my fair share of anonymous bullying and abuse during the life of my blog. My biggest advice is to delete the anonymous hate messages and comments, the trolling messages and block the IPs if you can. I’ve also blocked the drama/gossip blogs. Once I cleared my space from all that noise, I was able to blog peacefully and without fear.

Haters And Constructive Critics

Something I wish I would have known was to take critiques in stride and acknowledge when someone was intentionally being a bully to me. There are going to be people who hold your best interest at heart and want to help better you and hold you accountable for your growth and mistakes and then there are those who want nothing more than to see you discouraged. Knowing the difference is so important.

Safe Spaces And Blog Boundaries

Never feel bad about cleaning up your blog list, unfollowing, blacklisting or blocking someone who jeopardizes your safe space. Also never feel bad about asking your followers or mutual followers to tag things that are troubling and triggering for you. Set boundaries for yourself and your blog. I learned early on that it was impossible for me to try and answer every question that was sent to my inbox or e-mail.  I also knew that I could only devote a certain amount of hours to blogging a week. It is important to set limits within your means to keep your blogging experience enjoyable and safe.

Competition And Comparison

There is no use in trying to compete or compare yourself to another blogger or their blog. As I mentioned above, being uniquely yourself is so much better than trying to be a copy of someone else. Allow yourself to grow and learn and become the kind of Tarot blogger you want to be.

The Fear Of Missing Out

This is something that I still struggle with and it is the fear of missing out. You do not need to purchase every new Tarot deck that is released, buy every new Tarot book, take a new Tarot course or fund every cool independent deck on Kickstarter and Indiegogo to be or stay relevant. You do not need hundreds of decks to be considered valid. You are valid with one deck, no deck, or if all you have is a tarot app.


Post Notes:
Please do not remove the captions.
Title: Tarot Blogging What I Wish I Knew
Copyright:  © Ivan Ambrose 2017
Decks: Rosetta Tarot, Tarot Of Holy Light, Illusori Tarot
Disclaimer: This post in no way, shape, or form intended to tell you how you should approach your tarot blogging journey. The intention of this post is to share some things I wish I had known when I started my Tarot blog. What I find useful may not be useful or of interest to you and vice versa. I encourage you to do what you are comfortable with and to tailor any advice provided henceforth to your specific needs and individual situation. I encourage and open up this conversation to added commentary to supplement this post of any kind.
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Sleep (Bucky X Fem!Reader)

Characters: Bucky X Fem!Reader

Universe: Marvel, Avengers

Warnings: Mention of violence and fighting

FLUFF

Request: (Another request!) Can you do a Bucky x fem! Reader where the reader kinda acts like a cat and is constantly tired, no matter how much sleep she gets! Thanko! XD Oh, and if you don’t mind, can the reader have aerokinesis (if thats how you spell it XD). Thank you so much!


Originally posted by its-buckyy

Originally posted by picture--sex

Fury had took you in as an agent because of your ability to manipulate the air around you. Though others didn’t think it was a big deal and not that impressive, Fury had a use for your powers.

You were useful for making attacks of large groups of enemies slower, by increasing the speed of the wind pushing against them. If the Helicarrier had a problem with it’s rotors and the ship was losing air, you could use your powers to keep it over ground till the engines could be fixed. You could use your powers to fly and you had even trained yourself to be able to break the sound barrier with your powers, which came as a good distraction for the rest of the team to use to their advantage.

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anonymous asked:

wow, you write very well and detailed! the plot is amazing too. can I request a scenario of rfa (and v + saeran if you can) being yanderes while they're dating mc?

Oh, thank you so much! So… I didn’t intend to go full yandere because I wasn’t sure I was comfortable with (not because of the theme, I just wasn’t sure if I knew how to do this), but that kept getting darker as I wrote, and it turned out really abusive and angsty. I’m not proud about Jumin and Saeyoung ones tho, they’re not that great, but I hope that’s what you wanted. :)

TRIGGER WARNING: ABUSIVE BEHAVIOR, ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP

RFA + V and Saeran being yanderes ANGST

Zen

  • Whenever you hang out in public, he’ll always have an arm around your shoulder or waist
  • In bed, he enjoys fucking you in front of mirrors, he loves to watch himself giving you pleasure
  • Won’t let you cum till you tell him how great he is at everything and how no other man you’ve ever been with could ever be compared to him
  • He won’t forbid you of wearing certain clothes, but he won’t pretend he’s not bothered, he’ll pout and insist you have to change because he was the only one that deserves to see you at your best
  • If he’s not able to convince you, expect to find dark hickys all over your neck, collarbones and thighs after sex, that way you can’t wear low cleavage tops and short skirts
  • He’s not afraid of getting into fights if someone approaches you, fuck the scandals, you’re his
  • You always have a seat reserved on the front row during all of his musicals, and he makes sure the seats by your sides are empty, he doesn’ t want anyone distracting you from giving all your attention to him when he’s performing
  • At first, he would never let you be photographed or give interviews, HE is the public person here and anything concerning your relationship would be answered exclusively by him
  • He used to say this was for your protection, but you knew he just didn’t want you getting the same kind of attention he gets
  • But then, he realized  he enjoyed to show you off to media, so he’d spend days training you to say the right things and find the right clothes, so he’d dress you up like a doll
  • He was determined to turn you to a modern day princess and your relationship should always come across as a fairytale in the public eye
  • But he started actually believing in this, so any attitude of yours that didn’t meet his expectations would be harshly scolded
  • You didn’t feel human anymore, everything you did felt so robotic, made only for other people to see
  • He was the actor here, but you felt you were the one always pretending  to be this perfect princess
  • Neither of you knew what was real now, not even your love


Yoosung

  • He will hold hands with you in public and tight the grip everytime some guy (and girls, eventually) look at you and smile
  • In bed, sometimes his insecurities get the best of him and he can’t hold an erection for long, your warm touch makes him lose control of his body immediately
  • You would always reassure him it was fine, the sex was still great, anyways, and you loved him so much
  • But he didn’t like your tone. To his ears, you sounded like you felt pity for him, and he hated!
  • Still, you always managed to praise him a lot, and you just hoped he could notice that every moan and compliment you gave were sincere
  • He could almost read people’s mind on the streets when you went out. “What is she doing with him? Poor girl can get someone so much better” He was always wondering when you would realize that too 
  • He wasn’t strong enough to fight for you, so the only thing he could do was make himself weaker and weaker, so you would feel obligated to take care of him
  • So he’ll hurt himself everytime you get late from work/school, everytime you talk to another guy, everytime he feels you’re not giving him love and attention enough
  • He hates your pity, but if this will make you stay, he doesn’t care


Jaehee

  • Trust always was a low point in this relationship, even though she would never admit to you and to herself
  • You were always so sweet to everybody, sweet… or were you just flirting to everybody?
  • She gets it, ok? You’re a little younger than her, you’re pretty and bubbly, there isn’t a single person who wouldn’t fall desperately for you like she did
  • But she knew those guys would be coming to the cafe just to see you, they didn’t care about coffee at all
  • So hiring another person and putting you on paperwork felt like a natural move to protect you and her feelings for you
  • You missed talking to people, seeing their smile everytime you would hand over their delicious and beautifully made drinks
  • But you would never complain, you didn’t want to upset her, she would be so cold when she was upset and the sex would feel so awful
  • Because this would be clearly about her pleasure only, and sometimes you could swear your frustration would turn her on more and more
  • In fact, making you feel frustrated was an habit now. She would make you overwork so you’d always look frustrated, stressed out and tired. If you’d be like that, you wouldn’t look that cute to other people now, right?
  • She became what once hurt herself so much, but she couldn’t even realize it, she just wanted to be the only one to see your true beauty and sweetness that would be hidden behind those dark circles under your eyes and the ill aspect of your skin.


Jumin

  • You didn’t remember the last time you went out by yourself, if he wasn’t with you, at least two bodyguards would
  • His arm is always around your waist, he wouldn’t let his guards down not even around his own father
  • He is very possessive and demanding on bed and this is a huge turn on for you at first
  • But you could always tell when something went wrong at the office, because he would take it out on you very roughly,. Most of the times, you would feel the pleasure through the pain, sometimes you wouldn’t, it was just that scary pain
  • In the beginning, he was very understanding that you had different habits from his, but it got really perceptive when he was slowly pushing his eating and sleeping habits onto you. It was for your own good, he would say.
  • Controlling you was for your own good, he would say
  • Things started to get weirder when you went out by yourself for a couple hours. A friend of yours was in town, she was going through a tough time and could use a friend now, she seemed so sad and afraid, you felt that taking the bodyguards could be intimidating
  • When you returned home, you never seen his eyes that dark and never heard his voice this low and husky. “Where were you?” “Why didn’t you take my calls?” “Are you leaving?” “Are you trying to escape like Elisabeth did that time?” Oh no, not this again…
  • He got you a bracelet with a tracking device, the bodyguards got very detailed instructions about never leaving you alone if he was not around, a female bodyguard was hired exclusively to watch over for you in the bathroom, that was the level of insanity going around that penthouse
  • You and Elisabeth were his precious little kittens, but if you’d gonna behave like an wild animal, he’d need to tame you at all costs


Saeyoung

  • He is not too clingy in public, but he’s always by your side or a little behind you
  • In bed, he will make you scream his name out loud and tell you’re his, only his
  • If he was too busy, he would hire Vanderwood to keep an eye on you when you’d go out
  • As much as you enjoyed Vanderwood’s company, it was uncomfortable, and you told him. He didn’t like it, but dismissed his services on a very passive-agressive way.
  • “I’m just worried about your security, MC, it’s a shame you don’t care about yourself as much as I do… but I won’t tell you how to live your life”
  • Still, he needed to know if you were always ok, so he attached GPS devices on your clothes and would always hack security cameras on the streets to watch you
  • He also installed cameras and wires at your apartment, but he didn’t tell you.
  • Hacking your laptop and phone started as a hobby , but quickly became a habit, he’d love to trace patterns in your interests
  • But everytime you ‘d search something he considered inappropriate (like photos of that cute guy on that boy band) he would take down the internet at your home or send you a virus, this also worked as an excuse to go to your place or make you go to his, 
  • This happened so often that you felt you were actually living together, but not in a very natural way
  • He got obsessive about your online activities, he felt he could know you better like this than actually talking to you.
  • Everybody is more honest when nobody is watching, and although you were so special, you weren’t any different . Watching you like this would make sure you would never lie to him.
  • He just wanted to be the one who knows you the best, it was the least he could do after pushing you away like that. Now he wanted you closer as possible.
  • None of  the tasks he did for his previous job felt filthier like this one, and he got surprised how much this satisfied him


V

  • Like Saeyoung, not clingy in public
  • But he showers you in compliments in front of others, and gets slightly angry if people don’t respond in a way he considers adequate
  • Even when you don’t take his compliments as he desires, he will get frustrated. “You need to start seeing yourself as the magnificent person you are, MC. It really bothers me you’re uncapable of”
  • He puts you on a pedestal, and everytime you do something that doesn’t go according to how he pictured you should do, he will scold you for not reaching your full potential
  • Takes tons of pictures of you doing several activities during the day, and sometimes, he takes pictures of your reactions when he touches your body and praises you, those ones became a collection
  • A very prestigious art critic pointed out how the model would look despaired in some of the pictures, which V hated
  • Now he was determined to only get your joy in his photos, so he would create every possible situation that could make you smile. But still, nothing was good enough for him, you never looked happy enough, and he would be very clear about how frustrated he was with you
  • You watched as your boyfriend was only seeing you through pictures, you didn’t feel like a real person who could show her emotions genuinely
  • But what hurt the most was that you didn’t see your boyfriend’ eyes anymore, they were always behind the camera lens

Saeran

  • He’s too shy to show affection in public, but he’ll walk with beside you, glaring at people like a hound dog
  • In bed, he is very instable. Sometimes he treats you like a porcelain doll and touches you like you’re gonna break, he feels so guilty for everything he did, so treating you like this feels like he’s finally doing the right thing
  • Other times, he’ll be rough, very rough. You’ll have dark bruises due to hard hickys all over your body, he enjoys tasting your blood, he says is the most delicious thing he ever tasted
  • He can be like this out of the bed too, the shy and quiet Saeran or the loud one who’ll snap at you over the silliest things. You never know which Saeran you’re gonna face
  • He hates it being like that, he feels like shit and knows this is too much for someone so bright and lovely as you to handle.
  • But he’s so afraid you’ll see you’re making a mistake being with him, it’s probably a matter of time for you to notice you’re too good to him
  • So, before you realize that, he has to find a way for you not to feel so good, he needs to lower you to his level
  • His snaps will be more aggressive, he’ll tell you how useless you are at everything, you’re stupid, futile, you’re so lucky that he’s patient with you, you ‘d never find a guy who could bare you like he does
  • And slowly you start believing in that, you never noticed how much you and him are alike. Yes, you’re lucky you have him, if you two  are so wrong for the rest of the world, at least you can be wrong together.
  • He  feels like shit, the only way to make you stay is if you feel exactly like him
The Fitting (Part 4)

(Your attempts to ignore what happened between you and Jungkook are futile and you must make a decision about what your relationship will be going forward.)

Warnings: Oral, intercourse

It had been several days since you had last seen Jungkook and you were grateful for his absence.  All the boys were traveling for fan meetings and promotional events, but you had to stay behind in Seoul to finish alterations on their upcoming video wardrobe and get everything organized for the shoot.

In your mind, you practiced how you would behave once you saw him again.  The last time you spoke to Jungkook was when you had hooked up with him in the office.  You were disheveled, exposed, and still had the taste of him on your tongue when you told him to get dressed so you could get back to work.

You laughed at yourself for behaving so strangely.  You were embarrassed at the indiscretion and ashamed that you had been so brazen with someone younger, someone you worked with, someone you weren’t even dating.  The whole situation made you feel slutty.

On the other hand, slutty felt kind of good

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Demoralisation.

We’ve talked a lot about demoralisation amongst doctors, but I think it’s not always easy to understand. Because we do love our jobs and we do want to help people. We want to love our jobs. We all started off desperately wanting to be doctors, and many of us do actually enjoy the doctoring bit. So why are we all so down? I’ll try to give you a taste.

Imagine wanting to do something, to be someone so badly, that you spent your entire childhood and adolescence working singlemindedly towards it. You give it your everything, extra study, more tests, the works. Imagine being the smart kid at school, eager to work hard and impress, and being good at many things. Imagine being able to be nearly anything you could have wanted. Imagine spending the best years of your life stuck in revision whilst everyone around you was partying or dating or doing things that were fun. Imagine paying serious money for the privilege, and taking years out of your life to achieve it. Years studying. Years not working. Years of getting into debt when you could have been supporting yourself or your family. Imagine being so happy to graduate and finally be able to help people. Imagine your nervous, frenzied first attempts at being a doctor in the big bad world out there. Imagine the excitement of succeeding.

Imagine missing friends’ weddings and relatives’ funerals because there was nobody else who could be there to keep your patients safe. Imagine having to make countless excuses to friends and to family and to partners. Imagine all the dates who decided “this is just too… complicated for me. Sorry.” Imagine losing touch with friends because you were always moving, always busy, and always tired. Sometimes they will understand, sometimes they won’t. Imagine all your friends working reasonable hours, earning a decent amount and having time to actually have some semblance of a life. Imagine rarely being able to see even the ones that understand and love you for who you are. Imagine starting to forget what it’s like to have a hobby or do something that isn’t work. Imagine starting to forget who you are, where your role ends and where your personhood begins.

Imagine working long days and silly shifts only to come home and head straight for your books. For exams you struggle to pay yourself. Imagine being a single parent, and having to wonder whether you can afford to do this job because it’s so hard to get childcare. Imagine hearing your child say “You’re never home. I miss you” nearly every day. Imagine your partner telling you that you seem to be working more and more lately. Imagine feeling that you are neglecting your own loved ones in trying to keep everyone else’s safe. Imagine fearing that you will end up resenting the job you love, because it will have taken so much from your life.

Imagine feeling forced to work another last minute shift because there was literally nobody else. Imagine gradually finding that more and more, every day was short staffed and busy. Imagine feeling that you aren’t giving your best care because you are stuggling just to get the urgent things done and keep patients safe. Imagine skipping meals and lack of sleep so often that it becomes normal. Imagine feeling like you can’t take sick leave because there is nobody else to kee people safe.  Imagine things getting busier and busier until work is a nearly constant grind and you barely have time to think. Imagine nearly every day being a ‘major incident’. Imagine increasing pressure from all your colleagues. Imagine feeling unsupported by your seniors or your colleagues on a regular basis. Imagine being left to deal with difficult situations on your own. Imagine how hard it is to deal with grave situations, and how emotionally draining and heartbreaking it can be.

Imagine patients and relatives who don’t see the pressure you are under. Imagine those who scream, yell, demand things are done right away or threaten to sue. Imagine those who are verbally abusive or violent. Imagine the ones that make all your colleagues cry, and from whom you have to hide your tears. Imagine how often your colleagues never report abuse because they don’t feel that they can. Imagine a context where failings are subjected to ‘trial by media’ and individuals are vilified, but the systemic failings which caused mistakes to happen are neither acknowledged nor addressed. Imagine a culture where doctors are under duty by the GMC to whistleblow, but given no legal protection if they do so.

Imagine all your colleagues talking about considering leaving the profession. Imagine your colleagues who have already left telling you life is much better abroad or outside of medicine. Imagine nearly every speciality reporting recruitment shortages, bad morale and overwork. Imagine knowing that you are twice as likely to suffer from mental health problems or suicide.

Imagine becoming more and more afraid that you will slip up due to tiredness. Imagine fearing the impact that this could have on your patients and their families, and how you might live with yourself. Imagine knowing that if you did, you would probably lose your job, but the employers and those who caused those conditions to happen would face no consequences.  Imagine having to talk close friends off the ledge. Not just once, but on a regular basis. Imagine knowing that some people don’t succeed. Imagine knowing that this will only get worse if things deteriorate.

Imagine your boss saying that you’re not doing enough. Imagine them saying that you all need to work more days. Imagine them saying that there just need to be more cuts. Imagine your employer having already cut so many things that everyone is always struggling. Imagine a context where services are not appropriately funded, and then individuals working within are blamed for predictable shortcomings which could have been avoided with appropriate funding and safeguards. Imagine fearing that instead of proper investment, those whose job it is to look after your healthcare system may be trying to privatise it for profit. Imagine wondering if your patients and your children will be able to afford healthcare in the future.

Imagine your boss taking the safeguards away which limit how much time your employer can make you work. Imagine your boss reducing pay for the agency staff who are filling empty posts and keeping things afloat. Imagine being expected to work more hours, more weekends for less pay. Imagine the constant pressure to see more patients in less time, and being given less resources to look after them. Imagine knowing that you will probably work far longer than any rostered hours. Imagine knowing that your senior colleagues are fighting a similar battle and their conditions may be similarly affected. Imagine finding out how many of them can’t wait to retire, and remembering the days when doctors used to love working late into life.  Imagine realising that you may not win this battle.

Imagine your boss telling everyone they just don’t understand why you are all demoralised and telling everyone that you’re actually getting a pay rise and less hours. Imagine the public believing the lies. Imagine the media believing that everyone is demoralised because the union is telling us to be. Imagine the public telling you that you knew what you were getting into. Imagine the public telling you that you are overpaid, greedy, lazy, incompetent and ought to shut up and get back to work. Imagine the public telling you that the way your profession have chosen to voice your concerns (striking) is unacceptable, but not listening to any of the other ways your colleagues have tried to engage them. Imagine hearing over and over again that the system, which is underfunded compared to every other Western country, is ‘unsustainable’ when this is not true.

Imagine just wanting to do your job and help people, but feeling bogged down in difficulties that should never be a part of your job. Imagine loving being a doctor but hating what it has become. Imagine fearing that situations may get so bad that you too may be forced to leave for your own sanity and health.

This is why so many of my peers are demoralised.

The Wedding Crasher

I was watching Say Yes to The Dress when it hit me. Not too long ago I was having a conversation with my best friend about me and my wedding, in some distant future. He reassured me that no matter what he was going to be there with bells and whistles being a part of whatever I wanted. He thought I’d say he was going to be one of my bridesmaids, but I actually want him to be the one to walk me down the aisle because he means that much to me. Anywho… that is basically what got me to write this imagine! Enjoy :D

Taron finally sees you in your dress the day of your wedding day when he comes to realize his real feelings for you.

Warnings: None
Taron x Reader
Not my gif**

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Faith | 1

Originally posted by kimdaily

Chapters: [1] [2]

Pairing: Namjoon x Reader

Word Count: 3,280

Genre: Smut, fluff, will probably be some angst, but will always end up with a happy ending because that’s just how I roll.  

Notes: It’s a little-known fact that both of my brothers are hardcore rappers. Like, they have mix tapes and go to rap battles and have fans lol. I was attending one of their battles today to show support when this idea came to me. 


You were a good sister.

You weren’t going to leave before your brother even got to the stage.

You MIGHT get kicked out before then though, you thought to yourself, glaring as another random hand smacked your ass as they walked past you. 

You decided it was time to find a seat, preferably against a wall, and scanned the venue. The place was absolutely packed; the smell of weed, sweat, and God knows what else overpowering your senses. This was one of the biggest rap battles in the area, and yet they always booked places that were way too small to hold it in. Finally, you spotted a small booth in the very back, somehow free of people, and you make your way through the clouds of smoke and wandering hands. You crumble into the seat with a sigh of contentment. Perhaps your poor ass won’t bruise now.

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Lipstick stains | Wonho (1)

Genre: fluff 

Synopsis: Blond hair and pouty lips pulled into an insanely attractive smile but the first thing you notice on his face are lipstick stains.

Author’s note: I hope you enjoy~ 

Originally posted by wonhontology

Every parent has an obsession, yours are obsessed with finding you a suitor. In this day and age where boys and girls explore and have the freedom to find their own significant other, your parents want to settle with the old fashion way and find you a suitor. Your father is afraid that all the young potential men around your age will get snatched by other young eligible girls in the society and there won’t any good ones left for you. In a society where people date not because they like each other but what the benefits one gets from the later and marriages are more like business agreements, it’s very hard to find a proper ‘suitor’

Your father panicked because you not exactly ‘wanted’ like the other girls your age. You’re not a darling to your parents. You wouldn’t be called as a rebel but always did whatever you wanted regardless of what people thought of you. An attitude which isn’t appreciated in your society. So your parents began to set you up with every eligible young man that crossed their paths, from the chairman’s son to the guy you apparently sat next to in the 8th grade.

Although you weren’t interested in dating anyone at the moment you didn’t want to deal with your father’s continuous nagging so you went along with what he wanted. In the beginning, it amused you how the guys your father set you up with were as least interested in you as you were in them. They were just interested in the benefits your father was offering them. So by the 8th blind date, it wasn’t amusing anymore. It just disgusted you. They were just after the status that came with dating you. Their confessions were meaningless and they somehow thought you’d be easily impressed by their expensive gifts and physical appeal. Pathetic.

Your parents continued to find you a suitor and you continued to ignore them by locking yourself inside you art studio you brought for yourself eventually losing last bit of your interest in men. Which was not accepted by your best friend. And one Friday morning your best friend marched into your studio and dragged you to her house to doll you up while nagging you the whole time about how you will become one with the walls if you didn’t leave your studio.

You sat uncomfortably in the corner of the purple sofa, feeling out of place. You eye the room warily. The room was decorated with vintage furniture and paintings on the wall. The bright light shining on you from the ceiling and purple light emitting from the floor below your feet. Your best friend brought you to a Host bar for wealthy women and booked a private room just for you and your other friends. You squint your eyes at the lights and frown ‘Do these places have to look this tacky?’ But you are the only one who wasn’t enjoying this. The other girls who are your friends too sat side by side with a couple of hosts, giggling and flipping their smooth hair flirtatiously as they poured them drink after drink. You pull a face and place your untouched glass of alcohol on the table in front of you. You didn’t understand the point of places like these. You just flirt with handsome waiters all night and hook up with them in hotel rooms then pay them for their ‘service’. This place is definitely not for you but your best friend just told you to loosen up and enjoy.

You pull your best friend by her arm and whisper into her ear “Soo, you know how my father feels about places like this” you remind her “He’s already irritated with me for avoiding all blind dates he’s setting up for me. If he finds out I’m here, he’ll give a harder time!” rushing your last words in attempted to make her understand. Your best friend just smiles and waves her hand at you “Babe. Relax! It won’t hurt if he won’t find out!” She didn’t exactly whisper back. The host besides her shoots you a grin and pulls your best friend by her waist and kisses her cheek to which she replies with a giggle while saying “Have fun~”

Her definition of fun is just plain horrible! You’re not a party person and have never been. No matter how many times your best friend dragged you to parties she was invited to you never liked the loud music booming through the wall with bodies pressed against each other as the reek of alcohol and sweat. It’s too much for you. You always prefer quiet places and open spaces with fresh air. A cold breeze passes through your hair and the only noises around are the chirping of the birds or the sounds of ocean waves splashing. These places inspired you to draw and paint. But doesn’t mean you didn’t enjoy music, you do! You love soft melody and catchy beats just not when they are blowing up the speakers next to your head. Parties are just not your thing.

Another set of high-pitched giggles echoes through the room and you shift your eyes to your other friends. One of them faked a laughed at the host’s horrible joke but obviously loves the feeling of his hand rubbing her thigh. You roll your eyes and see the other one slip bills into her host’s breast pocket and coo into his ears. You can see his eyes visibly twinkle as he helps your friend off the couch, grabs her purse and leads her out of the room. Your friend catches you staring and winks at you before she leaves. You unlock the screen of your phone to check the time ‘12:08 am’. You let out a loud sigh with your head leaning into your hands. This is horrible. Your head is pounding and you just was to get out of here.

A strong scent of perfume fills your nose and there is a shift on the empty space beside you. You quickly look up to see a host. He has a flirty smile on his lips and he leans his head next to your face “Why aren’t you having fun beautiful?” He slurs into you ear breath reeking of alcohol. The hair on the back of your neck stands up as you scroll deeply when you feel his hand run up your thigh. That’s it. You have had enough “Don’t touch me!” You smack his hand off you harshly shocking the guy and got up. Grabbing your coat and phone you call out to your best friend. Twice. Thrice. She’s having way too much fun with her host boyfriend. You hated her sometimes.

You just walked out the room without bothering to let her know you’re leaving. She won’t notice anyway. You ran down the stairs while pulling your coat over your shoulder and swiftly walked out the exit. You hear someone calling you from the counter but you didn’t turn around. You have to get out of here. It’s suffocating. You need fresh air.

You took a deep breath as soon as you stepped out of the building and mindlessly walked a few steps and then came to a stop. Then it hit you. Your best friend drove you here so you didn’t bring your car. You let out a loud groan and stomped your feet on the ground, earning weird looks from passer-bys. How are you going to go home!? It’s going to take you forever to catch a cap at this time ‘Can this night get any more annoying?’

“Not much of a party person are you?” A soft voice behind you spoke. You jumped and turned around so fast you got a whiplash. A guy, buffed with blond hair and a very attractive smile on his face stared at you. His cheeks, jaw and neck covered with lipstick stains. You could tell from his white shirt and black pants that he’s a host and you scoff “You definitely are”

His eyebrows furrow cutely in confusion “You got a little lipstick here and there” I motioned at his cheek then to his neck. The male turned, still confused and look at his reflection on the glass behind him. Tilting his to the side to reveal the pink and red artwork on his face. You notice the tips of his ear turn red and he chuckled at you embarrassed while wiping the stains in a rush. You remember seeing him earlier. He was the one that had lead you and your friends to the private room and asked you if you have a requested for a particular host to assist you to which you had just shook your head and said you did want any.

He clears his throat, the shy face quickly replaced with a soft smirk “What are you doing out here? I believe your friends are still inside” he took a step closer to you making you move back. Not saying anything you just turn away from him and resumed to worry about how to get back home. The blond male moved to stand next to you, tilting his head so you could see his face “Want to get out of here?” he asks smiling at you, showing off his perfect white teeth. You pout your lower lip and nodded “more than anything” you reply sincerely. As soon as he heard your answer he stands in front of you with his hand reaching out to you “I’ll drop you” he offers, smile not leaving his handsome face. You shift your weight on your left foot and lead a little away from the blond male “Don’t you have some women to satisfy?” you ask giving him a suspicious stare.

“Ah no! They won’t notice I’m gone” He waves his hand and casually grabs your hand pulling you with him. You didn’t think he was serious when he said he’ll take you home “E-excuse me” you stammer panicking a little. You didn’t trust him. What if he forces himself on you the moment you sit in the car? What if he takes you to a hotel? You sniff the air around him. He doesn’t smell of alcohol. “Excuse me. I can go home by myself” You say trying to convince him.

He stops in front of a white car which you assume is his “Look. It’s late. You won’t find a cab anytime soon. If you want to go home, let me take you” He explains with a soft voice but you continued looked at him doubtfully. He sighs and raises his hands as though he’s surrendering “I won’t do anything to you. I promise”. He’s right though. It’ll take you forever to catch a cap here and you didn’t want to go back inside the bar. You eye him up and down, other than smudged stains on his neck he looked pretty harmless. After a moment of contemplating what position you’re in right now, you release a sigh “Fine”

He cheers a little and opens the door of the passenger seat for you and closes it when you slip inside. His car smells like freshly washed laundry. You give him your address and he drives to your area with all the right turns like he’s been there many times. He probably has. You quickly text your best friend that you’re leaving but didn’t tell her how. You want to give her a little scare. You turned your head and look at your new saviour. He’s handsome. Very handsome. Like superstar kind of handsome. His blond hair sit perfectly over his forehead, his nose is cutely shaped and he has a perfect set of pouty lips. You curious eyes then travel to his chest and arms. You can tell he works out with how buff he is. He has nice arms. The way his muscles moves inside the sleeve of his white shirt got you biting your lower lip. He could feel your eyes on him and you look away immediately.

He made small talk the entire car ride. It’s easy to speak to him. You spoke about general things and the conversation just sailed. The ride was short and in a few minutes he pulls in front of your manor “When you said ‘house’ you should have mentioned it’s a palace” His lips shaped in a cute ‘O’ You tell him to take you to the back of the manor where no one can see you sneak in without anyone noticing you.

He chuckles as the car comes to a slow stop “So you’re actually Jasmine. Sneaking out to have fun” He teases you. You lift your finger like you’re making a point “I didn’t exactly have fun” you correct with a smirk on your lips. “Not even with me princess?” he pouts and blinks at you. You lean a  little closer to him and whisper “You’re not Aladdin” He pretends to be hurt but laugh anyway. He has a cute laugh and it makes you smile.

“You’re a funny one sugar” You frown at his horrible nickname “I have a name, you know” you say.

He grins and leans forward getting close to your face “What is it then?” he asks, his voice dropping an octave. Blood rushes to you cheeks at the sudden closes and your breath hitches “ y/n. What’s yours?” you ask with fake confidence. He leans back into his seat and you let out a breath that you didn’t know you’re holding. “Hoseok. But everyone calls me Wonho” He replies lowkey telling you to use his other name.

“Well, Wonho. Thank you very much for taking me home” You say with a genuine smile and Hoseok swore his heart skipped a beat. You were just about to get out when Hoseok gets out and walks to your side and opens the door for you “The pleasure is all mine”

Gentleman. He’s a total gentleman. You get out off the car still smiling but you aren’t ready to leave yet. Hoseok closes the door and leans against it while staring at you “We’ll meet again you, Y’know”. You raise an eyebrow at him “Is that how you pick up all your customers for a revisit?” You ask him sarcastically and he tilts his head back and laughs “Yes. Actually, I do” He admits shoving his hands into his front pockets “But you’re different”

“How so?” you challenge him.

“Well for starters, You’re not my customer” Hoseok points out and you click your fingers at him while nodding your head agreeing. “And two” he takes a step closer to you again, bends down to your eye level and smiles “I have a gut feeling. I’m definitely going to meet you again” he says in a hushed tone. A shiver travels down your spine but you pull yourself to stand straight. Before you could open your mouth to retort he cuts you in “And no. I didn’t mean the club. But somewhere else”

You blush “Let’s see how right your gut feeling is” you say and he grins from ear to ear. He finds you cute. You move towards the fence and began to climb the bars effortlessly. Landing your toes perfectly, you turned around to look at Hoseok. He applause you for your skills and waves goodbye at you. You laugh and wave back before disappearing into the dark.

You flop down onto your bed as soon as you enter your room, hands wide on either side and your hair spread on the sheets around your head looking like a lion’s mane. A wide smile spreads across your face and you giggle. You won’t admit it out loud but Hoseok is the best thing that happened to you recently.

Next>>

Life in Color (Part 3)

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Summary: Modern AU. An artist in every sense of the word, Bucky sees color in everything, vibrant as they fill his world with magic. What happens when the colors fade?

Word Count: 1154

Originally posted by bovaria

Wanda had warned you that James probably wouldn’t be awake at a normal hour, but knowing Tony Stark, he’ll be calling to ask about the painting by noon. Not wanting to tell your boss that you hadn’t even tried yet when his inevitable phone call happens, you decide to take your chances showing up at 10:30. You pass an attractive man with blonde hair and blue eyes in the hall. He gives you a small smile and you can’t help but wish that you were here to see him - whoever he is - instead of James.

When you reach his apartment, you knock on the door only to be met with no response. You knock once more, harder this time, causing the door to fall open a little. It feels a little intrusive, but the door was unlocked and opened on its own. There’s nothing stopping you from pushing it open just enough to step inside, so you do. Besides, with the way his lifestyle is often reported, you wouldn’t be surprised if you discovered him overdosed in the bathroom or murdered by a vengeful lover in the bedroom. You’re doing a civil service by walking into the apartment.

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Mirror of the Soul: Part 9 (Loki x Reader)

Note: Clint is a babe. That’s all I have to say. Let me know what you think or if you want to be tagged! I love hearing from you - I really do want to know what you liked or disliked about this!

Words: 1890

You can find the other chapters here: Loki Masterlist


One of the best parts of the week was definitely take out night. Tony would order in the most incredible food and he’d always order so much that there would be enough food in the fridge to feed the entire group for a days. Tonight, you’d been blessed with pizza but you just weren’t in the mood to sit around and chat to everyone.

You showed your face long enough to grab a few slices then, much to the disappointment of the others, made a hasty retreat. However, you didn’t head to your room. Instead, you made your way up one of the service staircases. Tony knew you used these back routes so had started extending JARVIS’s scanners to cover the space but you kept finding new spots to hide in.

You’d also started learning how to disable the existing scanners to make new hiding holes too, although you definitely weren’t going to tell your uncle that. Whilst he’d be impressed that you were hacking his systems, Tony wouldn’t be happy that you were putting yourself into a situation where, should something bad happen, you’d have no way to call for help.

Still, the thought of your uncle’s disapproving glare hadn’t stopped you yet.

Carefully carrying your plate of pizza up the stairs, you soon reached a little hidden balcony that overlooked the common room. From here you could look down on the Avengers and enjoy the conversation without feeling bad about saying nothing.

The evening progressed pretty uneventfully. Steve and Tony argued over the last slice of pizza like usual. Thor and Loki sat in the corner chatting away about old times while Natasha and Clint threw knives at the wall in an attempt to determine who had the best aim (it turned out neither, since Loki managed to beat them both without even turning to face the target). Bruce simply sat back to watch the madness like an amused parent keeping an eye on their kids.

Somewhat curiously, Clint was the first to get up and leave. Usually he stuck around well into the night so you wondered what was important enough to get him to go first. No one else in the group thought it strange behaviour, though, and they just waved him off with a few good night calls.

By this point, your eyes were starting to get tired so you took off your glasses and leant back against the concrete wall. The scene below you suddenly changed as the shimmers of your friends’ souls began to appear around them. You couldn’t explain the emotion but it was like welcoming back an old friend.

You’d forgotten how much you’d relied on these manifestations before. The way the lights interacted with each other told you so much more about how close people could be; there was such love in the group for one another, it was stunning. Watching the colours mix, swirling around and following the pace of the conversation, you realised how much you were missing.

               "I’m surprised you managed to find this place,“ a voice said, pulling your mind away from the abstract beauty below. "Can I join you?”

You swung your head around and saw Clint poking his head around the corner. Your initial reaction was to send him away but, seeing as he’d climbed through a few rather tight spaces to find you here, you decided to let him stay.

He crawled in to the small balcony, handing over two large cushions and a blanket. “Figured you’d be getting uncomfortable cooped up here, so I came bearing gifts.”

               "Thanks, Clint,“ you muttered, opening the tub of ice cream that he’d also managed to carry up to you. You almost looked over to him before remembering that you’d taken your glasses off, and you weren’t quite ready to put them back on yet.

Instead you just watched the light of his soul out of the corner of your eye. It was an unusual combination of orange and indigo, each vying for dominance. Of course, both represented admirable traits and you let them fill the small space, providing a gentle, content hum to the air.

               "You could have joined us for dinner, you know. We all love having you around. It’s so great to see you up and about. Nat says it’s like you’ve had a new lease of life since Tony perfected those glasses.”

               "I want to spend time with you all, honestly, but I’m much more of an observer. It’s easier for me to sit back and let conversation flow over me.“ You let out a sigh, knowing that you weren’t articulating your point as well as you’d hoped. "I’m just not used to being a part of a group. I feel rude sitting in silence and just listening.”

Clint shook his head, resting a hand on your knee. “If you ever feel uncomfortable, you should let us know, Y/N. We just want you to feel part of the family. It’s okay to sit in silence. Banner does it all the time and we’ve not thrown him out yet.”

               "I know. And I do feel like part of the family.“ The orange swirls around Clint lit up at your admission and practically danced around you in joy. It made you smile until you remembered that this was the beauty that you were sacrificing in order to live a normal life.

               "Do you want to talk about it?” Clint asked, pretending to be fully focused on his own pot of ice cream as he actually watched your face drop.

You realised he had no idea why you were up here but wanted to help in whatever way he could. In all honesty, he already had, just by turning up with these small comforts. Even though you didn’t want to trouble him with your inner thoughts, you found yourself doing just that. “I never thought I would but I miss seeing the souls.”

               "That’s a pretty reasonable response, Y/N. You’ve spent most of your life with this extra sense and now you’re living without. It isn’t easy to lose something you rely on. I understand how you’re feeling.“

               "It’s easier for you. Your hearing aids give you back what you lost. You got that sense back. These glasses save my life but take my gift away. My powers feel like they are just out of my reach, but I know they’re still there. It’s like having something waved in front of you just to be ripped away.”

Cilnt let out a sigh and you realised just how quickly you’d dismissed the hardships he must have been through. You immediately apologised; after all, he’d been nothing but kind to you since you’d arrived at the Tower. “I’m sorry. I know it must have been hard for you.”

               "It still can be, at times,“ Clint divulged, taking another spoonful of ice cream. "Yes, they gave me back my hearing but it’s not the same. The world feels distorted. And sometimes, my brain can’t cope with it. All the extra information that it’s no longer hardwired to process hurts.”

               "What do you do when it gets too much?“

               "I take out my hearing aids and embrace the silence.” Noticing that you’d stopped eating your ice cream, Clint reached over and swapped your tubs over. “Here, try this one. It’s much nicer.”

You smiled at the gesture, wondering why you’d never really hung out with Clint before. He was exceptionally perceptive - a trait you admired, being able to inexplicably understand things about you people yourself.

               "That’s better,“ he said, kicking your foot when he saw your smile. "I can’t pretend to know anything about your powers, Y/N, but I can say that sometimes you just need to accept the hand you’ve been dealt.”

               "What are you trying to say, Clint?“

               "You need to use the powers you’ve been given. I don’t mean running around without your glasses on and wantonly putting yourself into dangerous situations but, occasionally, sit back and enjoy the view. Just don’t tell Tony that it was my suggestion if he catches you in the act.”

You nodded, both promising not to put the blame on him but also to take his advice. “How did you know I was up here, Clint? I know for a fact that this spot isn’t covered by JARVIS’s sensors.”

               "It’s one of my own hiding places. I saw a shadow up here when I was downstairs eating and figured it had to be you. You’ve managed to get quite a reputation for sneaking around these back staircases.“

You shrugged, trying to hold back the smirk on your face. "Tony always said I had a talent of ending up in places I shouldn’t be.”

               "Nothing wrong with that,“ Clint pointed out, swapping the ice cream tubs back again. Stretching out as far as he could in the tight space, pulling the blanket over his own legs, he said, "Can I ask you a question?”

               "Sure,“ you replied, not really paying attention. You were watching Thor and Loki joking around in the common room. It was amazing to watch the way their souls interacted. With every taunt, their souls would battle for supremacy around them in the way that you only ever saw in families. For two such damaged souls, there was a lot of love there.

Following your gaze, Clint smiled to himself and muttered, "I think I already have my answer.”

Before the logical part of your brain could stop you, you whipped your head around to face him. Thankfully, Clint was far more alert than you and he shoved a pillow in your face just in time to stop you from making eye contact with him.

Pushing his arm away, you turned back towards the common room and rolled your eyes. “Next time, cover yourself rather than trying to smother me.”

               "And hide this beautiful face from the world?“ he chuckled. "So, are you and Loki… You know?”

               "God, you’re such a child.“

               "I knew it! Tell me everything!”

Your only response was to kick him. Hard. So hard in fact that you were pretty sure everyone in downstairs in the common room heard Clint swear at you. They swung their heads in your direction but no-one other than Natasha realised what they were looking at. You couldn’t see for certain but, judging by the way the crimson ribbons around her rippled with amusement, she just rolled her eyes and continued her conversation with Steve.

Giving Clint a death stare without actually making eye contact - a difficult feat but one you’d perfected after many long years of practise - you hissed, “Secret hiding place, Clint. As in, don’t give away its position by shouting.”

               "You’re so vicious,“ he said almost proudly.

               "Yeah, I’ve heard. Tony tells me that every time I hit him.” You reached down and grabbed your glasses, slipping them back on and turning to Clint. With a tinge of sadness, you watched as the bright colours around him faded away.

Leaning across the small space, you pulled him into a gingerly hug. “Thanks for the ice cream. And for the advice. I really appreciate it.”

               "Any time, Y/N. Whatever you need from us, we’ll always be there for you. You’re part of the family now. You couldn’t get rid of us if you tried.“


@naniky @justonemore-fic @aekr @marvel-fanfiction  @archy3001 @imboredsueme @verryfuckingpunny @hvrricaanes @siriuspadfoot14  @bittersweet97blog  @biatheintrovert  @ladydork @snipsnapyappap @leauvel @ourboulevardofthedead @awesomefandomsunited @2-many-fandoms95

À Triomphe - BTS AU

AU:  Art Thief!Bangtan

Description: You are a curator at one of the many museums in Paris, and have finally earned the bosses trust.  But after a strange meeting with a new coworker and his friends, you begin receiving messages from an unknown party.

Part:  Five / Four / Three / Two / One

Warnings: Violence, Swearing.

Originally posted by kook-min


Text Message from Unknown Number

I can’t stop what will happen next
but Don’t let Jeon see you


Jin stopped in front of the back entrance of Maillol, quick to avoid the transport trucks parked in front which carried in the latest paintings bought from various markets around the world.  He stood, feet together, staring at the moon as it shone over the cityscape of Paris, leaving a glow against his skin that left you breathless.

“Ah, this was fun, (y/n).”  Jin took a moment from admiring the moon to glance at you, smiling as soon as he did.  He took a step forward, his nimble fingers grazing the nape of your neck.  “I hope you’d want to see me again,” he hummed.  

A loving smile inched it’s way onto your cheeks, leaving a red tint as you chuckled to yourself.  “I’d love to, Jin.”

Jin stood taller, happy with the news of a guaranteed second date.  “Well, then, princess, I think you should get back to your castle.” You laughed, covering your gummy smile as he himself began to snicker.  “Why are you so shy?”  He quizzed.

A small sigh escaped your lips as your hand fell back to your wallet and the small box of macarons, half of which had been eaten on the way back. “I’ve never had that good of luck with guys, honestly.”

“Am I the exception?”

“For sure.”

Jin grinned, gently removing the box of macarons from your grip and rattling them.  He placed the small parcel under his arm as he moved his hands to sit gently on the nape of your neck, bending over slightly to leave a kiss on your forehead. Jin brushed out your hair before removing his touch from you, bowing slightly and waving goodbye as he turned the corner.

You backed against the brick wall that was the tail end of the Maillol, clutching your chest as you sighed.  “God, what are you doing to me?”

You quickly gained your composure, removing your hand from your now ruffled shirt to the inner pocket of your jacket.  Nothing.  Your heart stopped momentarily.

You had left your keys in there, hadn’t you?  Hadn’t I? you thought.  Your hands began to roam every inch of your body, furiously patting as you began to grow more frustrated by the minute. You could’ve easily ignored it and walk home, had that very set of keys contained the only key to your apartment.

Click.  It hit you.  You must have left them at the café.  Duh, you muttered, I didn’t lose them, you thought.  Although they were important, they weren’t important enough to trek another hour back to the café at night.

Your hand instinctively gripped the back of your head, lightly tugging on your hair, as it was a nervous tick you gained while working in retail some years ago.  It never seemed to leave you.

A lightbulb went off, smiling as you had remembered the carrier truck parked out front. In a matter of minutes, you found yourself doubling back onto the main street and to the front doors of Maillol, stopping to grasp the edge of the carrier truck to catch your breath. A man of rugged texture, with a clean shaven beard, stood in front of the door, his back to you.  He began to fidget with the locks, before turning promptly.  You quickly rose back to your full posture, shouting as you waved your hands for his attention.  “Ah, sir, please stop!”

He stood, staring suspiciously as you approached him abruptly.  “Sir, I work here and I’ve misplaced my keys, could you please let me in?” He stood, still, almost timid to walk away from you.  Had it not been for your uniform, you were sure he wouldn’t have tolerated your beratement.  But he quickly turned, letting out a small groan as he began to fidget with the lock once more.

You smiled, jumping in your socks as you thanked him repeatedly.  He opened the door for you, nodding with a small grin as he watched you enter before turning, and leaving.

You stood in the front room of the Maillol; a scene completely different to that of a serene environment.  A small sound made what seemed like a million echoes on the marble flooring of the complex, only made worse by the narrow and shallow halls leading to many of the exhibits.  You sighed, placing your wallet on the reception desk as you quickly took off your jacket and setting it down, as well.  You flipped the light switch on.

Your kitten heels clicked as you paced across the floor to the nearest employee office, which had been locked.  A groan escaped your lips.  The next best place for you to sit in peace would be the director’s office.

Slowly opening the director’s door, you inched yourself across the room to the desk, sitting as you let yourself rest before reaching for your phone to call a cab.  You pulled the string hanging from the bosses decorative light, which only brought in a little light to the room.

After you had made the call, you began to play with the different apps on your phone, finding anything to entertain you for the period of time it would take for the cab to get to the outskirts of Paris.

As you had just begun watching oddball videos on youtube, your phone glitched.  The screen turned black.  

Of fucking course, you thought to yourself.  Could this get any worse?

You looked up from your now useless gadget to stare at the door, out of sheer instinct;  the lights had turned off, as could be seen from the crack leading to the outside of the office. You turned on the lights, hadn’t you?

You pushed yourself up from the desk slowly, walking towards the door as you gently began to turn the knob.  Your heart stopped.

“God damn it, Jimin, help me!”

Jimin?  Your mind raced to hours before.  The small man, his hair as orange as the sunset and a smile that could charm millions.  There’s no way, you stood baffled.

The footsteps got closer, as did two new voices.  “Yah, you jackass, it’s not that heavy.  I’ve carried tons of heavier things.”  

The disembodied voice boasted on the number of things he had stolen, the number of weight he can list, how heavy a human body was after the loss of consciousness.

“Shut the fuck up, Guk. If you’re such a strong man, help me.”

You removed your hand from the knob, quickly holding your breath in as you tried to calm yourself down.  It can’t fucking be, you groaned.

Four years.  Four years I’ve worked here, and not a damn robbery had happened.

But it seemed the night you were most vulnerable was the night most eligible for this act to be carried out.

The voices and footsteps echoed as they got farther away, farther and farther; soon out of earshot.

You quickly, and quietly, opened the door, staring out into the pitch blackness to see flashlights glowing in the distance.  You rushed yourself across the floor into the other direction; an amateur mistake you regretted as soon as you had made it.

“Who the fuck is there?”

“Don’t fucking stand there, go get them!”

You yelped as you looked over your shoulder, seeing a bulky man jogging as he came down his end of the hall. You doubled across the Picasso exhibit and into a small hallway leading to and from the Degas room.  You stood at the corner of the Degas room entrance and the dead end hallway.  This was the only room in the entire museum that didn’t lead to another room, and thus was also one of the most reclusive exhibits.  The position you chose was cloaked in darkness; you hoped for the best.

“Come here, I won’t hurt you.”

The lights in the hall seemed to strobe over you but never landed in a precise enough position to give you away.

“I just want to help you out of here, you’re safe with me.”

The voice mocked you; how sweet and coddling it was.  His boots walked in an eery rhythm, keeping you on your toes with every inch.  You held your breath, pushing yourself flat against the wall as the footsteps engulfed you.

One. Two. Three. Four.

As the boots clicked closer to your corner, your sanctuary, your hideaway, you grew more anxious.

What did he want? For fuck’s sake, what did he want? And why aren’t I getting any fucking service?

You fidgeted with the buttons on your phone; your hands shaking, the clock ticking as he gained on your position.

Clunk. Your phone teetered on the floor, the screening cracking on impact.

Shit, you thought, fucking shit, you muttered. His footsteps halted.

“There you are, baby,” the gravelly voice cooed.

You panicked, letting out a curdling scream before a harsh impact sent you falling.  Your vision went black.


You could hear everything.

“Oh smart, Jeongguk, the poor girl might have a concussion.”

“Did you want was a witness?  Because, hehe, last time I checked, you fucking hate witnesses.”

“I’m not the one who clobbered a girl with the blunt end of a flashlight.”

Your head nodded back and forth as you began to rock in the cold, metal chair.  You felt your wrists grow itchy as you gained feeling in your extremities.  

“You asshole, why’d you do this?”

“Oh, you go on one date with the girl, because it’s your fucking job, and suddenly she means the world to you?  Grow some balls Jin, this is how we work.”

“We don’t work to give girls comas, we work to get money.”

Your eyes slowly fluttered open, only to be greeted with blurred vision.  You couldn’t recall much of what happened, only the immense pain pulsing from the back of your head.  “Get out the way, idiots.”

You felt a strong grip grasp your chin, as your vision slowly came to a focus.  A man with familiar caramel colored skin was staring you in the eyes, pushing his tongue against his cheeks as he examined you.  It was Theo. “Her pupils are reactive, she’ll be fine.”

Another boy, a little shorter than him with dark brown hair let out a small growl.  “I still think we need to take her to a doctor or something.” Another, in a black v-neck and boots, barked back, “I’ll die before I let her rat us out.”

A laugh echoed from the corner of the room before coming into sight.  “Settle down, Jeongguk… you go on a couple heists and got a taste for blood again, I see?”

The boy named Jeongguk visibly winced at the saying, memories seeming to flood his thoughts as he let out a small groan.  “All I’m saying is we can’t trust her, Namjoon.”

Your eyes rolled involuntarily as your head fell limp.  The restraints on your wrist seemed to grow tighter.

“She doesn’t look fine, Tae.”  

Jeongguk came close, his feet carrying the weight of a thousand different personalities it seemed, lifting your chin back up to see you losing consciousness once more.  

“My poor baby,” you heard him mutter.


Degas: A famous French artist

Picasso: A famous Spanish artist