the archbishop

anonymous asked:

explain cheeky nandos??

you know like when you’re hanging with the lads and its top notch banter and your mate joe is like lets go down for a cheeky nandos but you’re skint so you’re like i dont have quids for that lets just go for a quick maccies or gregs or somat and joe bloody banterclaus is like stop being a wanker but then your lad johnny offers to pay for your nandos cuz he’s a absolute fuckin ledge so you’re well chuffed and you all get proper hyped having top bants bout torie cunts with your fucking ledges

Hey Everyone! When I was younger, I used to read a ton. As a direct result of that, my writing and reading were on point. Recently, however, I haven’t been reading as much, and as a result, my writing isn’t as good as I want it to be (albeit, still pretty good). I’ve decided to read all the books on this list over the next 1 and a half years to get back into reading and to improve my writing. Enjoy! :)

1. To Kill A Mockingbird by Harper Lee

2. The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald

3. Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen

4. Animal Farm by George Orwell

5. Jane Eyre by Charlotte Brontë

6. The Catcher in the Rye by JD Salinger

7. The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain

8. Macbeth by William Shakespeare

9. Lord of the Flies by William Golding

10. Hamlet by William Shakespeare

11. Brave New World by Aldous Huxley

12. The Scarlet Letter by Nathaniel Hawthorne

13. Romeo and Juliet by William Shakespeare

14. A Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens

15. The Ecological Rift by John Bellamy Foster, Brett Clark, Richard York

16. This Changes Everything: Capitalism vs The Climate by Naomi Klein

17. Catch-22 by Joseph Heller

18. The Crucible by Arthur Miller

19. The Odyssey by Homer

20. The Red Badge of Courage by Stephen Crane

21. Wuthering Heights by Emily Brontë

22. Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut

23. Robinson Crusoe by Daniel Defoe

24. The Canterbury Tales by Geoffrey Chaucer 

25. The Stranger by Albert Camus

26. Frankenstein by Mary Shelly

27. The Grapes of Wrath by John Steinbeck

28. Beowulf by Unknown

29. The Systems View of Life: A Unifying Vision by Fritjof Capra, Luigi Luisi

30. All Quiet on the Western Front by Erich Maria Remarque

31. A Midsummer Night’s Dream by William Shakespeare

32. Heart of Darkness by Joseph Conrad

33. Treasure Island by Robert Louis Stevenson

34. The Glass Menagerie by Tennessee Williams 

35. Faust: First Part by Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

36. Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoyevsky

37. The Awakening by Kate Chopin

38. Candide by Voltaire

39. The Color Purple by Alice Walker

40. The Metamorphosis by Franz Kafka

41. Oedipus Rex by Sophocles

42. Uncle Tom’s Cabin by Harriet Beecher Stowe

43. Steppenwolf by Hermann Hesse

44. One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich by Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn

45. The Bell Jar by Slyvia Plath

46. The Call of the Wild by Jack London

47. Walden by Henry David Thoreau

48. Antigone by Sophocles

49. Things Fall Apart (The African Trilogy, #1) by Chinua Achebe

50. Gulliver’s Travels by Jonathan Swift

51. The Last of the Mohicans (The Leatherstocking Tales #2) by James Fenimore Cooper

52. Madame Bovary by Gustave Flaubert

53. Beloved by Toni Morrison

54. Vanity Fair by William Makepeace Thackeray

55. Selected Tales by Edgar Allen Poe

56. Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury

57. 1984 by George Orwell

58. Don Quixote by Miguel de Cervantes 

59. The Sound and the Fury by William Faulkner

60. One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel García Márquez

61. The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde

62. A Good Man is Hard to Find and Other Stories by Flannery O’Connor

63. Pygmalion by George Bernard Shaw

64. As I Lay Dying by William Faulkner

65. Invisible Man by Ralph Ellison

66. The Three Musketeers by Alexandre Dumas

67. A Doll’s House by Henrik Ibsen

68. Narrative of the Life of Frederick Douglass by Frederick Douglass

69. Tess of the D’Urbervilles by Thomas Hardy

70. A Farewell to Arms by Ernest Hemingway

71. A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man by James Joyce

72. Waiting for Godot by Samuel Beckett

73. Moby-Dick; or, The Whale by Herman Melville

74. The Iliad by Homer

75. Inferno (The Divine Comedy #1) by Dante Alighieri

76. Babbitt by Sinclair Lewis

77. An American Tragedy by Theodore Dreiser 

78. The History of Tom Jones, a Foundling by Henry Fielding

79. Long Day’s Journey into Night by Eugene O’Neill

80. War and Peace by Leo Tolstoy

81. Cyrano de Bergac by Edmond Rostand

82. The Hunchback of Notre-Dame by Victor Hugo

83. The Mill on the Floss by George Elliot

84. The Cherry Orchard by Anton Chekhov

85. Their Eyes Were Watching God by Zora Neale Hurston

86. Bartleby the Scrivener by Herman Melville

87. Doctor Zhivago by Boris Pasternak

88. The House of Mirth by Edith Wharton

89. Selected Essays by Ralph Waldo Emerson

90. Leaves of Grass by Walt Whitman

91. The Good Soldier by Ford Madox Ford

92. Call it Sleep by Henry Roth

93. Fathers and Sons by Ivan Turgenev

94. The Portrait of a Lady by Henry James

95. The Adventures of Augie March by Saul Bellow

96. A Death in the Family by James Agee

97. The Turn of the Screw by Henry James

98. The Magic Mountain by Thomas Mann

99. Go Tell It on the Mountain by James Baldwin

100. Death Comes for the Archbishop by Willa Carther

101. To the Lighthouse by Virginia Woolf

British culture (apart from cheeky nandos lmao)

-Dodgy af ice cream vans
-An insurance advert every 2 minutes
-Elaine the pain
-u wot m8???
-digestive fucking biscuits
-total wipeout
-going to tescos but finding a bunch of lads circling the entrance on their bikes
-Jeremy Kyle is top notch
-Chatty man is also top notch
-*friend gets offended* ‘it’s a only a bit a banter’
-no one voting for Tories but they somehow manage to end up running the country???
-chavs
-FUNKY PIGEON.COM
-watching come dine with me with the fam

ADD SOME MORE MY FELLOW BRITS

you’ve heard of losers club high school hcs, now get ready for

losers club shitty british secondary school hcs

oh boy here we go

- the losers club on a duke of edinburgh expedition. that is all
- the uniforms. dear god the uniforms. richie and bev are constantly in detention for breaking the dress code and it’s how they became best friends. bev customised hers with badges and embroidery and rolls her skirt up way past the knees to defy sexist uniform codes. she’s always stopped in the hall by the pedantic deputy head who seems to be employed for the sole purpose of telling girls off for having short skirts. richie wears his tie way too short and always has his shirt untucked and his top two buttons undone. his blazer is also mysteriously at home 24/7
- stan and ben have this really intense, passive-aggressive war to become head boy. stan eventually gets the role and ben has to deal with being deputy
- whenever someone does something stupid in lessons the whole classroom erupts with ‘waaaaayyyy!’ this is usually led by richie.
- the school is in a really crappy part of town and at lunchtime the losers go to tesco to get food and sit in the park affectionately known as ‘druggy park’
- in year 8 they tried to fit eddie into a locker and that’s how he broke his arm
-they all refer to each other as their surnames, and the teachers as their first names
-richie once drew a dick on the board in his form room with permanent marker by accident so mike turned it into a tree
-eddie’s always in the nurse’s office, to the point where they’re so close she sometimes gives him lifts to and from school
- mike’s a really talented photographer and wins all the local competitions. his pieces are on display boards all over the school
- in terms of clubs, richie runs the school radio and is into drama, bev runs textiles support sessions for the younger years with a few of her classmates and is also on the debate team with stan and ben, eddie is a peer mentor for students struggling with mental health issues and is also involved with art club, bill is on the rugby team as well as writing articles and short stories for the school newsletter, stan is friends with the headteacher bc he attends chess club which the headteacher runs and he also helps the younger years with maths, ben is a student library assistant and mike goes to gardening club. he’s really proud of the carrots they’re growing behind the science block.
-stan and bill get the same bus. there was nowhere else for stan to sit on the first day of year 7 and that’s how he and bill became best friends
- the school has wild parties in the name of charity. at one, richie got so drunk and gave eddie so many hickeys he had to be taken to the er by his mum as she thought he had a skin disease. it didn’t help that he was super hungover either so he looked like death warmed up. needless to say it’s ‘the story’ of the night and the talk of the whole school (including teachers- they join in with the students’ conversations about the parties in class) for like a month
- they have a sleepover at mike’s and he unashamedly owns ‘angus, thongs and perfect snogging’. they all agree it’s a british classic
-eddie went through a sherlock phase in year 10 that threatened to become a superwholock phase. it was a dark time for everyone. 
-the whole squad get a cheeky nando’s
-richie and eddie make out in the common room and stan’s head boy office during frees. richie’s given eddie hickeys in there too. stan is disgusted when he finds out. there’s also a hidden path next to the train tracks that they go to if either of those places are occupied
-bill is hailed as a god by the younger students. they say ‘yes then big bill’ and high five him when they walk past him
- richie is known as the archbishop of banterbury throughout the school. what an icon
- on the last day of sixth form they all hit the local ‘spoons and make the most of the 2 for £12 pitchers by buying like 10
-mike’s dark secret is that he was on an episode of ‘dick and dom in da bungalow’ once. he’s vowed to take it to the grave. richie broadcasts this to the whole school via the radio as soon as he finds out.


bonus round for things that actually happened during my experience in secondary school:

- there’s a weed scandal in like year 9. somehow a wildly untrue rumour about stan hiding weed in his locker is being spread round the school
- beverly hides the clocks in her form room in the ceiling. her tutor buys a new clock. it goes in the ceiling. her tutor buys another clock. into the ceiling it goes. you get the idea. soon staplers and whiteboard pens start making their way up there
- richie and eddie make a meme gallery. it’s taken down in time for open day but some of the teachers genuinely think it brightens up theirs and the students’ days
- the losers are in the same teaching group in year 7. their pe class has to do chair dancing to hey big spender (it’s best not to ask) and it becomes a recurring joke for them throughout the years
-richie had a house party where stan got drunk for the first time and ended up chundering in his sink the next morning


add more if you like!

5

The second born child and only daughter of Their Royal Highnesses The Duke & Duchess of Cambridge was born on May 2, 2015 at 8:34am BST at Lindo Wing of St. Mary’s Hospital weighing 8lbs 3oz. Her Royal Highness is fourth-in-line to the throne; and on May 4, 2015, it was announced that the new Princess would be named HRH Princess Charlotte Elizabeth Diana of Cambridge. Princess Charlotte was christened at St. Mary Magdalene Church by the Archbishop of Canterbury on July 5, 2015.

Happy 2nd Birthday, HRH Princess Charlotte Elizabeth Diana of Cambridge!