AUTHOR’S NOTE: I was trying to update “Jeffrey’s Hill” but I was listening to “Beautiful” by Baekhyun and “Beautiful” by EXO and then my imagination ran wild … and this came to mind. I’ll be updating “Jeffrey’s Hill” soon though! This is just a cute little one shot because I’m ultimate Suho trash.
MEMBER/GROUP: Kim Junmyeon/Suho
GENRE: FLUFF. IT’S SO FLUFFY I’M GONNA DIEEE!! (If you got that reference just know you’re amazing and imagine me handing you pizza. I LOBE YOU!)
DISCLAIMER: The GIF below is not mine. Credits go to the person who made it! Thank you!
A WHOLE YEAR WITHOUT JUNMYEON.
You couldn’t process it. A whole year without him. Without his cute smile, tight hugs, caring whispers and gentle cuddles. A whole year without his silly Dad jokes that never failed you crack you up. A whole year without waking up next to him and giggling at the sleepy smile he always wore.
A whole year without Junmyeon, and you’d survived.
At first, the days seemed to roll by tantalizingly slow. You’d stare at the clock, hoping time would take pity on you and fast forward to the moment you’d reunite. Several days, you had to remind yourself he was gone, and that it would be a while before he returned. It was hard being in denial.
Then you just grew really angry. How could SM do that to you? You knew they wouldn’t approve of your relationship, but you didn’t think they’d go as far as separating you two for a whole year. Why were they so cruel? It was his life, shouldn’t he have a say in the matter? You’d spend several nights typing up angry emails to the managers, only to end up deleting them later on. You couldn’t bring yourself to lash out at them, despite the anger you felt. The last thing you wanted was to go against a company with an intimidating amount of power.
Once you realised you couldn’t bring Junmyeon back sooner, you felt an indescribable sadness. He wasn’t allowed you to contact you, so you couldn’t even bask in the comfort of his cute, cheesy texts. He was completely cut off; and you were forced to accept it. Some nights you’d struggle to fall asleep, thinking of everything you wanted that you couldn’t have: his back hugs, soft hums, gentle voice singing you to sleep, the feeling of his fingers woven through the gaps between yours and the glimmer in his eyes when you told him you loved him.
You just missed him. So much.
You had also tried contacting the other members to see if you could speak to him somehow, but they never answered. SM had gotten to them too. You’d eventually lost count of the days and nights you’d spent in tears, wondering what you’d done wrong. Was it wrong to fall in love?
Finally, after months of denying it, being angry about it, shedding tears over it, you’d had enough. If Junmyeon could cope, you had to do the same. Your life couldn’t end with this silly year gap. You reached out to friends. You hung out at coffee shops, quiet streets, rain scented parks. You spent more time finishing all the drafts you possibly could, and had even piqued the interest of a publisher. You had then proceeded to work on a novel, and that was what sped up time.
Days went by and you didn’t notice, too engrossed in perfecting characters, fixing plot holes and correcting spelling errors. To add a bit of humorous irony, your publication date was set a week before he got back. But you didn’t notice, you had to make sure everything was right. Nothing could ruin this. This was your first novel, and it meant a lot to you.
Nothing could take that feeling of euphoria away. It saved you when you found out Junmyeon’s return would be delayed. It saved you when you found out the company had attempted to set him up with another idol. It saved you when you read the headlines, confirming the new couple. It saved you from getting your hopes up when they called it off, and it saved you when you realised he had changed his number.
Little did you know, Junmyeon was fighting day and night to return to you.
“Wow, ‘Breathe’, a novel by Y/N, has sold over a million copies, and is currently a dominating best seller! The story revolves around sixteen year old Brea Farren, who sees the ghost of her deceased best friend, and has to live with the imaginary phantom’s torment until she finally learns to let go. The book has received a huge amount of love and support from the teenage demographic, who claim to have easily related to the character’s feeling of being lost and confused. It is now famous in schools all over the world, and is changing many lives and helping many deal with grief.”
The interviewer, Pauline White, grinned at the camera. “We have the mastermind behind the book here today, ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Y/N!”
The audience cheered as you entered, taking a seat opposite Pauline. “Good morning!” She grinned. “How are you feeling today, Y/N?”
“Great!” You smiled at the cameras, genuinely feeling your heart lift. “I’m still in shock over the recent news, it’s unbelievable!”
Pauline laughed. “How so? Your writing style is beautiful, it made me cry! I think over the course of their lives, everyone goes through some kind of loss. What was the inspiration behind the book? Did you lose someone the way Brea did?”
“No, I think my character’s suffering was an exaggeration of mine, really,” you responded. “I did lose someone, but not to death.”
“Ooh, are you perhaps referring to Kim Junmyeon?”
You simply grinned in response. “I didn’t even realise I was using the story as a closure to my suffering, it was just a sudden realisation once I started reading all the comments. People were telling me they’d grown to accept losses that weren’t close to death, and that despite everything I’d put my character through, her perseverance and strength inspired them.”
“Is Brea Farren another version of you?”
You laughed and shook your head. “No! Never, I could never survive what Brea did. She’s a strong one, for sure.”
“Towards the end of the book, Brea reunites with a friendlier version of her best friend. Is this an indication of your reunion with your special someone?” Pauline winked at you, and you giggled. “No, there hasn’t been a reunion in my life yet, the ending was more plot beneficial.”
“Yet? There’s no reunion yet?”
“Wow, that’s all you could focus on?”
“You two were the cutest couple ever! I can’t help the excitement, Y/N! A writer and a singer, it’s beautiful.”
“Thank you, Pauline.” You gave her a warm smile. “That’s really sweet of you.”
Unbeknownst to you, Junmyeon sat in his room, watching you intently. He’d just gotten back, and he had been advised to get some rest, but the second he’d heard you’d be on T.V, all thoughts of sleep were out the window. He hadn’t seen you in a year.
When he saw you walk out, his heart leaped. You looked stunning, your hair was longer and it was tied back. You were dressed casually, but you pulled it off so well. You wore a cute beige jumper over a black, collared shirt, paired with ripped, white jeans. He smiled at the sight of your favourite Converse, knowing you’d opt for those.
Once he heard you go on and on about your book and the writing process, it felt like falling in love all over again. He couldn’t watch you smile and laugh and blush without grinning like a madman. He couldn’t hear you giggle without laughing at how adorable you were. He’d missed you, so damn much. Everything about you. Everything he didn’t have while he was away.
Making up his mind, Junmyeon shut the T.V and grabbed his coat, snatching his car keys as he exited the dorms, being extremely cautious so as to avoid being caught. Once he was safe in his car, he drove to your place. When it came to you, he couldn’t wait.
Standing in front of your apartment had never been this awkward. Junmyeon stared at your keypad, wondering if you’d changed your password. It had previously been the date of your anniversary, but he knew it would have been painful to have kept that.
Seeing no other starting point, he punched in the numbers, smile growing heavy once the buzzer sounded, signalling a wrong input. He thought it over. What meant a lot to you?
It couldn’t be…
He punched in the numbers and winced when the buzzer sounded again. It wasn’t your birthday either. What could you have possibly changed it to? Junmyeon took a moment to think it over, going through all the possible dates that could hold a certain amount of significance to you.
Finally, he landed on the date your book had been published and quickly punched in the numbers, wanting to avoid being seen. When the door unlocked, he grinned and stepped inside, shutting the door behind him.
He shivered, realising you hadn’t turned on the heat. As if he’d never left, Junmyeon made his way to the living room, spotting the heat controls immediately. He set it to the right temperature and collapsed onto your sofa, sighing as the plush material sunk with his weight, yet forming a perfect mould to his body. Nothing had changed, apart from furniture and the paint. You still had photos of your parents around the house, next to photos of you with him.
This put him at peace, knowing you hadn’t given up. With all the crap his company had put you through, Junmyeon knew he was lucky to have fallen in love with someone so resilient. Now that he was back, and neither of you had moved on, he knew his company would have to accept it. They’d been certain one of you would give up and move on, giving them the victory.
As he fought to stay awake, he smiled at the thought of being victorious, finally standing on top of his company, a little rebellion against everything they had said and done to him.
Sleep came a lot easier when he was surrounded by you.
He woke up to soft humming.
Junmyeon rose, turning to face your smiling face as he yawned. His head had been on your lap. The two of you stared, neither making a move, just drinking in the sight of each other. You noticed the change of hair colour. He noticed your change of clothing style.
You noticed how tired he looked. He noticed the happy gleam in your eyes, feeling his heart thud louder as he took in the soft smile you wore, breathing in your familiar scent. You had never been one for strong perfume. You preferred the mild scented ones, and he loved it on you.
“Did you sleep well?”
He didn’t respond. Instead, he stood up and gestured for you to do the same. Confused, you stood up and watched as his eyes scanned your body and then met yours again. “I just wanted to make sure you’re in good shape.” Your heart fluttered, and your smile widened. After a whole year of being away, he was still concerned about your well-being. You weren’t sure how you were keeping your composure.
“You shouldn’t be telling me that, jagi,” you stepped closer to him, cupping his cheek. God, you’d missed this so much. Holding him like this. Watching as his eyes fluttered shut at your touch, hearing his breathing relax as he blew out gently. “Look at you. You look exhausted. You need more sleep.”
His eyes were open again, and he gave you that look. The one you’d defined as a silent “I love you”, the one he often gave you before he kissed you. “I’ll sleep later, I just want to hold you for now.”
Slowly, he leaned forward, lips inches away from yours. You shut your eyes, feeling the teasing, ticklish touch of his eyelashes as he placed his mouth atop yours.
Instantly, you melted.
Memories flooded your mind as Junmyeon kissed you gently, hand cupping your cheek while his free arm wound around your waist, bringing you closer to him. You were sure he could hear your heart beating frantically, but you didn’t care. You were completely lost in him, in the way he held you, in the way he kissed you, and the warmth you had been deprived of for a whole year.
“Jagi,” you frowned. “Please wear a scarf, you’re going to catch a cold if you walk out like that.”
Junmyeon spun around and gave you a cute smile, obediently wrapping a scarf around his neck and bringing it up to his nose. You smiled in content, pushing yourself up on your toes as you kissed the tip of his nose, giggling when he quickly dodged more kisses and nuzzled your neck.
“I know it does, it’s why I did it.”
“Okay, that’s it. Whoever wins this round makes dinner tonight.” As if he never had plans, Junmyeon unwrapped the scarf and let it fall to the floor as he counted down, watching in amusement as you made no move to run until he finished.
“Wrong move, Y/N.”
You squealed as he lifted you bridal style to the sofas, placing you down gently. And yet, his fingers were merciless as he attacked your sides, watching as you squirmed and laughed hysterically, desperately trying to gain the upper hand.
He didn’t oblige, forcing you to roll off the couch and fall to the floor. Not wasting anytime, you brought yourself to your feet and tackled Junmyeon to the sofa with all the strength you could muster, laughing at his horrified expression. You didn’t tickle him. Instead, you leaned down, slowly bringing your lips closer to his, softly whispering, “I win.” before you kissed him.
You remembered how that felt. It felt like falling, but there was no rush. The wind seemed to carry you gently, and the euphoria was intense. It was the exact same feeling, watching Junmyeon’s flushed cheeks and slightly swollen lips as he stepped back and whispered, “I missed you. So, so much.”
Normally, you weren’t so brave, but his year long absence had boosted your courage.
“Really?” You shot him a cheeky smile. “Prove it.”
He laughed. “Gladly.”
And then his lips were on yours again.