the animals don't need your excuses

AU STUFF BC IM TRASH

  • ‘I was third wheeling with my best friend and his/her bf/gf at the amusement park when I got stuck sitting on a two seated roller coaster with some stranger and something happened so now we are stuck almost at the top and I hate heights but at least they are really hot’ au
  • LIFE GUARDS WORKING AT A WATER PARK AU
  • 'we got partnered up to take care of a fake!baby for health class for a month and I have been taking it home to take care of it bc you don’t want too but I’ve had enough im about to sledge hammer the child anD YOU SO YOU BETTER STEP THE FUCK UP AND FUCKING HELP ME TAKE CARE OF THIS PLASTIC CHILD OR SO HELP ME’ au
  • 'we are on a field trip with our class hiking and you got distracted by something and I HAD to stay back to get you bc buddy system and fuck where did everyone just go we’re lost shit and theres no signal up here we’re screwed and im going to die bc of your dumb ass fuck the buddy system and yOU (no but really i wouldn’t mind you are seriously hot if we make it out alive call me)’ au
  • 'its 2 am, I have been traveling for 48 hours straight from plane to plane and you won’t stop irritating me stop doing that thING I WANT TO SLEEP GOD DAMN IT AND THIS PLANE ISN’T LANDING FOR ANOTHER 12 HOURS IM NOT DEALING WITH THIS FOR THAT LONG EVEN IF YOU ARE CUTE AS HELL’ au
  • 'I came home from the dog park with the wrong fucking dog they looked exactly alike and had the same color collar fuck diD I JUST DOG NAP SOMEONES DOG AND DID SOMEONE DOG NAP MINE (ok not that mad bc I called you from the number on the collar and we met up giving eachother our dogs sorry for the mix up and shit you are attractive)’ au
  • 'you left your facebook up in the apple store and I took a stupid picture of me posting it with a status bc you forgot to log out hA but also you are hot and I added myself as a friend hope you don’t mind’ au
  • 'my cat got stuck in a tree so I climbed to get him out but then the big branch that helped me up broke and now Im stuck up here with no way to get down with my cat and you’re a really hot firefighter this is really fucking embarrassing pls help get us down before i die of humiliation’ au
  • 'im trying to fish for the first time on my own and im failing miserably at it and I hate you for catching 8 fish in the last 15 minutes fuck you and also how the hell are you doing that teach me’ au
  • 'we’re at a kissing booth and I need to do this for charity and you have come back here 5 times already having paid like 30 dollars just for a kiss from me ask me out already so you don’t need an excuse or need to empty your wallet to fucking kiss me’ au
  • 'we were jogging in the park beside one another and it suddenly got competitive and we ended up racing but you/or I tripped over something aND HOLY MOTHERFUCKING SHIT IS THAT A FUCKING DEAD BODY’ au
  • 'found a kitty in a box and it was too cute to leave and I came home to our dorm, I know you’re allergic to cats and we’re not allowed to have animals in here but can we keep her???? please just until we find a new home looK AT THIS CUTE LITTLE FACE’ au
  • 'looking for a certain book in the library and this part is dark and sketchy and I feel like im in a horror movie and holy shit you scared the hell out of me so I ended up knocking over a row of books which caused a domino effect so now 3 rows and if they catch us they’ll make us pay for damages and im a broke college student rUN AWAY’ au
  • 'I was working out at the gym and the girls locker room is under construction and I don’t have time to go home and shower bc I have class so I used the boys locker room since no one was around bUT THEN YOU WALKED IN AND NOW SHITS AWKWARD HELLO WE ARE BOTH NAKED AND IDK WHAT TO DO’ au
  • 'I was staying after school at the library for a project when I heard music from the music room and I peaked in and shit you are really musically talented don’t stop I want to hear more’ au
  • 'im at the mall as an elf for santas helper and I look like an idiot but I need the extra money and shit what the hell is my (hot) nemeses doing here and nO THEY SEE ME AND ARE COMING THIS WAY FUCK MY LIFE’ au

anonymous asked:

For the literal millionth time, we don't eat animals because they are sentient. Plants are NOT sentient. No serious plant scientist thinks that they are, this argument is so ridiculous and so widely spread that a group of the most experienced and authoritative biologists have felt the need to co-sign and publicly release a letter on behalf of the scientific community to assert that plants are absolutely not sentient. We have known this for almost three decades there is no excuse for this shit.

Time for another round of find the vegan with untagged wank. 

First of all, what is your definition of sentience?  There is no definition of sentience that all animals fit under.  You’d be hard pressed to convince me that insects, for example are sentient, but they still count as animals, and thus eating them wouldn’t be considered vegan.  As suggested by the very joke I made, science is starting to find evidence for complicated biological processes in plants that suggest a certain degree of sentience by basic definitions.

 And what about animal byproducts? A chicken produces eggs without human intervention.  Many of them would be unfertilized, even in a wild setting.  Eating an egg found off the ground is not harming an animal.  Many types of domestic cows produce more milk than their calves drink, even outside the industrial complex, and not milking cows sufficiently can cause severe health issues.   

I’m fully against the exploitative agro-industrial complex that encourages the abuse and neglect of animals.  Factory farms are a terrible byproduct of our food industry and I do everything I can to find alternatives. 

I do not, however, believe that the hunting or raising and butchering animals is inherently abusive or immoral.

(Also, on a note unrelated to the moral issue, I literally cannot be vegan.  I would literally be so sick I would be incapacitated due to iron deficiency.  I don’t know if you’ve ever suffered from pernicious anemia, but it’s literally the worst, and if eating red meat at least once a week as prescribed by my doctor keeps me from ever suffering from it again, I’ll kill the cow myself.)