the actual greatest person

Today I went to Barnes & Noble and was checking out the teen fiction section when I found the greatest quote I have ever read in my 24 (almost 25) years of living. You’re not ready so just take a breath before this happens to you and you can never go back, okay?


“Poppy slipped her long, white limbs into her pale yellow dress, like milk sliding into melted butter.”

What not to say to people with eating disorders

This post is dedicated to those of you who know someone with an eating disorder. Are you afraid of saying something wrong, and want to know what you should and should not say?

(It is very long, and for that I apologise.)

Please read the post with respect. This applies to both patients and their family/friends. Remember that no one are perfect. The person with an eating disorder is not using her/his eating disorder as an excuse to “be difficult”, it is a real and severe problem for her/him! Just as important to note is that family and friends are not mind readers, and they are not mean. Knowing that someone you love and care about have a life threatening mental illness, is a terrible situation to be put in, and most parents will do ANYTHING in their power to save their child from illness and death.

Below is a list (with explanations) about what to say, or what not say, to a person with an eating disorder:

- Do not ask yes/no-questions. If you ask a question such as: Can’t you just eat this dinner?, the answer you receive will likely be no, and the conversation abruptly stops. The answer you receive might also be yes, but be a lie.

- Do not ask leading questions. If you ask: There is no way to make you eat this dinner, is it?, the answer will likely be no. Leading questions come with a huge disadvantage: The person can feel forced to lie. Because you are giving her/him an ultimatum, but the eating disorder does not allow this ultimatum to be realized. Please note: I am not saying that family and friends should “play along” with the eating disorder. But I am saying that if you directly oppose it, there is a high risk that you could make things worse (aka make the eating disorder stronger instead of weaker).

- Ask open questions. This is the way to go. As opposed to the two prior examples, you could ask: How are you doing right now? Why do you think this dinner is difficult for you? Are you afraid of something specific? Is there anything I can do to help?
As you can see, neither of these questions are yes/no-questions or leading questions. In other words, open questions like these will make room for honest answers. The person will feel safe that you simply want to help, and that you are trying to understand.
You should also be clear that it is fine if the person cannot, or does not want to, answer the question. Be clear that you just want to show her/him that you care. You can also add that the person can come back to you whenever she/he feels like it, and answer the question later.

- Do not say “I know EXACTLY how you feel!”. Because unless you have had an eating disorder yourself, it is very unlikely that you know that. Ask open questions instead.

- Do not comment on other people’s body or weight. First of all, this is bad manners and can be very impolite. Secondly, for a person with an eating disorder, body, weight, and appearance is by far the most difficult topic for conversation. Body, weight and appearance are topics that can, and should, be limited to treatment settings. Plus; there is a major chance that the person already knows what you think of her/his body.

- Do not say “You look better!”. This is a tricky one. Hard to understand, even for people with eating disorders (believe it or not).
Imagine this: You think you are chubby, overweight, or fat. In spite of this, your family and friends (sometimes also complete strangers) tells you over and over again that you need to gain at least 15 kilos/33 lbs. When you finally do gain, everyone are running in your direction to tell you that they can see you put on weight.
I doubt that would feel nice for any person, eating disordered or not. And this is my point here. Almost all people with eating disorders see themselves as fat/chubby/too big. It is also very common that they want to become healthy, and want to fully recover, but still do not want to gain any weight. You should avoid this comment because it confirms (indirectly, and wrongly too, of course) that the persons greatest fear of all has actually come true, they have now become even fatter, chubbier, or bigger.
It is very easy to understand why family and friends want to tell their beloved one that they look healthier! It is meant as a compliment, meant to be something mutually joyful.
It took me years to be able to handle this comment. Believe me, I have tried multiple times and failed. I tried to feel happy about it, I tried to block out the voice that translated “you look better” into “you are the most obese person on earth”, I tried to control my own reaction to make people happy. It always ended with a fake smile, and a bunch of chaos. And relapse. I have had an eating disorder for years, and it took me quite some time in recovery to be able to handle the comment as well. Before this happened, I had to overcome all the hatred I harbored against my body. 

- Do not comment on other people’s eating habits or -patterns. People with eating disorders are fully aware that they have different eating habits (or –patterns) than you, whether the difference lies in amounts or food types. First of all, the comment is unnecessary. Secondly, comments like these only contribute to the person feeling guilty: (S)he does not want to bother anyone, but now receives a clear message that that’s what (s)he does. Knowing that you worry people who love you, does not make the eating disorder loosen its grip. What it usually leads to, is the person wanting to eat alone or in secret, lie about food intake, or resort to purging/laxative abuse/(excessive) exercise. The same rule applies when/if the person eats what you think of as “too much” or “unhealthy”. Don’t bring it up. Just don’t. Leave the person alone.

- Do not talk about food during meals. I am not saying you should not express your joy over fabulous, tasty sauce/gravy. What I am saying is you should avoid saying things like: “I am so stuffed!”, “You must be very hungry!”, “Aren’t you having one more portion?”, “This is healthy!”, or “Nah, this is quite unhealthy!”. If the person actually tries to finish his/her dinner plate, you are transforming the effort into a house of cards: It could collapse any second.
If you say “this is healthy”, the person might experience trouble eating tomorrow’s dinner as it is “less healthy” (because it contains more carbohydrates, for example).
If you say “this is unhealthy”, you have potentially ruined dinner with immediate effect. In many cases, the person might resort to purging, (excessive) exercise, etc. to rid him-/herself of this “unhealthy” thing. The person might also “transfer” the unhealthy-label to many other food types similar to the one you just called unhealthy.
If you say “aren’t you having one more portion?” it could make the person stop because it is made very clear that (s)he has already consume one whole portion. (While portion sizes are unlimited in recovery, because (s)he needs all the energy (s)he can get.)
If you say “I am so stuffed!”, there is a chance that the person will make sure to eat just a fraction of the amount you eat. If eating less than you is too late, the person might resort to purging, (excessive) exercise, etc. to get rid of the “unnecessary” food.

- Do not talk about dieting, diets, healthy/unhealthy food, weight loss, or exercise. This is triggering to almost everyone. If you don’t feel too thin (to be “allowed” to do any of these things), why would a person with an eating disorder feel too thin? (This is how the illness works.) If you think you should diet, why shouldn’t the person with an eating disorder diet? It is very likely that the eating disordered person feels like (s)he is at least twice your size – even if YOU are twice HER/HIS size, for that matter. Be careful!

- Do not assume you need to tell other people what they are doing. It is not your duty, it is none of your business, and you are not the first one to point out what they are doing either. Most patients, no matter what illness/condition they suffer from, receive well-meant advice every single day. Sometimes even from people they have never met before.


Another important factor regarding this topis, is (well-meant) advice.
People with eating disorders receive tons of (well-meant) advice day after day. We who have eating disorders, of course know that the advisor means well. That, however, does not necessarily mean that any of these advices actually help, and it is not necessarily a good idea to give the advice either. In fact, you should try to avoid giving advice as often as possible.
I am not saying one should never offer good advice, but there may be several reasons as to why you should not give the advice at all. I recommend you use the following questions as a guideline:

- IS this good advice?
If so, why? In what way do you feel certain that this will make a (positive!) difference?

- Do you think the person has received this advice many times before? If so, do you really find it necessary to repeat the advice for the forty-fifth time? The least you can do is ask the person if (s)he has received the advise many times before, and if (s)he has, then drop it. Completely.

- Is your advice medically safe? Guaranteed? Or is there possibly any (slightest) chance that you are wrong?
A good example here is exercise. Many patients in recovery are encouraged to start exercising. The argument is that exercise strengthens bone mass and increases muscle mass. That is true, of course, but it only applies to people without an active eating disorder! In reality, people with eating disorders should’nt exercise at all (in spite of all the wonderful health benefits), simply because exercise very often keeps the body in starvation mode (making it impossible to recover), and also because muscle- and bone mass are already broken down – if they are broken down even more (yes, this is what exercise does, it breaks down muscles), they are never given the chance to heal.

- Is there a chance that your advice has a triggering effect? If no, how confident are you? Have you had an eating disorder? Has the person told you in detail what triggers her/him? (If you feel any doubt at all, mention the topic first and ask if this could potentially trigger.) If the advice turns out to trigger despite trying the opposite, do your best to debrief the situation afterwards.

- Øygunn

but my theory is that basically they wanted to get those tattoos of each other’s names except they couldn’t because it would’ve looked suspicious so they started this whole poll madness to fool the clique and they were like alright alright if it’s a tie then well and if it isn’t we’ll just hack some shit to make it a tie so that we can get those tattoos without blowing our very bad cover that no one believes in as it is

10

#i’m not crying #you’re crying

hannigram - an abusive relationship?

Spoiler alert: it’s not. (But it kind of is. I’ll go in depth about that in a moment.)

I wrote this for a conversation I had in twitter, and thought I wouldn’t need to post it here, but since I saw yet another person claiming that hannigram is abusive I thought I’d post this.

People use the term abusive about relationships that are unhealthy (in their opinion), as evindence for why it should not be shipped/supported. The correct definition of abuse is:

“Treating badly or injurously, mistreating, especially psysically.”

And of relationship abuse it is:

“A pattern of abusive and coercive behaviors used to maintain power and control over a former or current intimate partner. Abuse can be emotional, financial, sexual or physical and can include threats, isolation, and intimidation. Abuse tends to escalate over time. When someone uses abuse and violence against a partner, it is always part of a larger pattern of control.”

So according to this it is abusive, I get it. They both try to kill each other multiple times, they manipulate and lead each other on. They don’t sexually abuse each other though, which at least in my opinion is the worst sort of abuse and I couldn’t ship a couple who did that to one another.

The other thing in this description that doesn’t quite match Hannigram is “abuse tends to escalate over time – it is always a part of larger pattern of control”. The mental abuse between them is at it’s worst in S1 where Hannibal manipulates Will into believing he’s a killer - but this is not to show his power over him, it is simply the only way Hannibal can bring Will into his life. Hannibal has after the first half of S2 been ready to drop the manipulation and violence between them as soon as Will does. And I haven’t seen anyone blame Will of being the main abuser, even though it could be argued that it’s solely his fault that the abuse continues.

The reason why Hannigram doesn’t fit the normal description of abuse is because their relationship is meant to be read as symbolic, not as a literal ideal of love. It’s fiction, and it should be treated as such. Fiction is great, because we can explore possibilities and relationships etc. that aren’t possible in real life. Thankfully the majority in this fandom are really intelligent and understand this, and only few people have failed at understanding what the shoe is about. That group still exists, and that’s why I felt the need to post this

What I believe the antis actually mean when they say it’s abusive is not just that it is violent and manipulative, but that “It’s an abuser/abused relationship, Hannibal is evil and Will is innocent, their relationship won’t work and does more bad than good for both of them, or at least for Will”.

Like I said earlier, it’s not a healthy relationship and it’s not one that I literally want for myself or for anyone I care about - but it’s not unbalanced. At least when we reach the end of third season they are certainly equals, there’s no denying it. I understand that some people don’t ship it because it’s too far from an ideal realtionship, and that’s okay, but hating on it and denying the fact that they’re equals who both choose each other in the end is just plain ignorant.

Will has always been alone, always been different. His relationship with Hannibal gets so close so fast because Hannibal is the first person who actually sees him. I’m gonna quote a Hannigram fic here because I think it described their relationship so well. (Will to Hannibal:) “You always wanted me to be the best version of myself when no one else accepted me for what I already was.” Just like Hannibal let Will see him, Will also let Hannibal see him. Hannibal didn’t “make an innocent puppy become a murderer”, he helped him to become what he already had the potential for.

If the antis and/or deniers have only seen season one, I need to admit that I understand them. Will did kind of seem like an innocent dog loving introvert back then if you didn’t pay much attention to details (like how coldly he treats the parents of the missing girl, how he isn’t afraid of human contact but despises it, how his humor is so dark that it often shocks his colleagues and friends and so on. I could make a post about this, if anyone is interested about that let me know). The first season is about Hannibal manipulating everyone into thinking Will is a killer, experimenting on Will and he does seem like a coldhearted psychopath there.

In season two we see Will gaining more power back, him manipulating and even seducing Hannibal. He isn’t afraid to kill a man in the progress, he eats people with Hannibal almost flirtatiously. This is not what an “innocent” man would do, or even what innocent man physically could do. The darkness inside him is becoming more clear, and even he himself admits that even though he wants to, he can’t hate Hannibal.

Will (to Peter): “I envy your hate. Makes it much easier when you know how to feel.”

He still betrays Hannibal in mizumono (even though he does call him at the last minute to warn him). Before I always though it was just because Will was still trying to cling to some sort of morality, but after Hugh’s comments it is obvious that Will was also afraid Hannibal didn’t and/or couldn’t love him the way he loved him, and so he thought it would be dangerous for him to run away with him and trust Hannibal with his life and wellbeing. Here is what Hugh said:

“I think Will has probably in some way never conceived the possibility that Hannibal could be in love. I mean, he’s got such a black heart. The awareness that they have this connection is something Will knows and is probably in some way profoundly ashamed of, and is also, you know, he keeps coming back to and actually kinda fills him with joy as well. But I don’t think he’d ever give it the name love, because I don’t think he’d ever associate love with Hannibal. – He’s never thought of Hannibal as being capable of love. Because like most of us, he probably had love put off on a kind of pedestal, as an idea, a more perfect thing, as he made the awful realisation: ‘Oh crap, maybe this thing I’m feeling is like love.‘”

I think it is clear to everybody at this point that Hannibal loves Will. His love, though, isn’t your typical “murderer obsessed with a beautiful and innocent woman (obviously man in this case)”. Hannibal loves Will because they understand each other, because they share a way of seeing the world, but also because they have interesting conversations and because they share the same sense of himor and have fun together. In a way, it’s just normal love, just deeper and richer since neither of them has ever had a change to explore that kind of love with anyone else before.

So to conclude: if you take it literally, yes, it is abusive, but that doesn’t make it wrong to ship it, by Hannibal standards at least. (The whole show is a little fucked up so if you can’t live with that why are you here?) Also, it has been abusive until this point only because they (well, mostly Will) have still struggled to accept their feelings for each other. Hannibal has only physically hurt Will if he has betrayed his trust or tried to hurt him first. Personally I don’t believe Hannibal would ever hurt Will again if they were to be a real couple. He also stopped the mindgames and manipulation as early as when Will got out of prison, knowing what he was. And Will has hurt and betrayed Hannibal mostly because of the reasons I stated earlier, because he thought it was the only way to save himself. If they stopped their game of cat and mouse (a game of cat and mouse where the roles change from time to time, or maybe even better description would be a game of cat and cat like Bryan called it) I wholeheartedly believe that they could live in a relationship where neither of them abuses the other.

Like Bryan once said, the core of their relationship is that:

“They had imagined they were unique before they saw each other. Obviously it took Will longer to appreciate that because he didn’t quite realize what he was dealing with in Hannibal, but Hannibal sees it instantly. It’s two people who have never been - I mean Will probably wears it heavier - but still, essentially alone in the world and then see some kind of, maybe not mirror image but the other side of their coin.”

And like Hugh said:

“In a sense the two of them have been wandering the Earth, totally isolated, because they have such a specific and elevated mentality. Not identical, but it is as if not only are you the greatest chess player on the planet, you’re actually the only person on the planet that can play chess. And then suddenly you walk into a roon one day and there’s a guy playing chess. I think that’s how they feel about each other.”

If you leave out the murder and cannibalism and manipulation, Hannigram is about two people who are different than anyone else finding love in each other. Their relationship evolves slowly from friends to lovers, and even though they try to move on neither of them can because they share something so intimate. So in its own, weird and symbolic way, i think Hannibal and Will’s relationship is build on a much better base and is possibly even healthier than many other ships and canon couples out there.

I believe I found a way to kill off Aramis at the end of my S3 AU without anyone who would care even knowing he was dead (I mean, I guess eventually someone would suspect, but not until quite a while after the fic has ended) and without requiring Richelieu to lie to Treville again (because not even Richelieu would be sure what happened to him unless he simply asked investigaged which he sure as hell is not going to do. It is going to be the one thing in life he just doesn’t know. It’s a new situation for him. Let him enjoy that feeling, okay?).

Meaning I actually get to kill him (albeit off-screen) without having to waste a single thought on any possible emotional fallout, leaving me free to get to focus just on the emotional bits I actually look forward to writing. Everyone gets their happy ending, untainted by grief over a character I do not want to write anyone grieving for in a meaningful way.

:D

Just finished reading The Fifth Season by NK Jemisin and it is SO GOOD, possibly the only book where I actually don’t mind the chapters in 2nd person? And also the greatest characters and seismic magic and rising up against oppression in small and big ways. Can’t wait for book 2 so I can re-traumatise myself! If you like clever complex fantasy then please read this so that I can talk to you about it and cry.

Matchmakers

Paring: Scott McCall/Reader

Tags: female reader, human reader, angst, happy ending, matchmaking, some spoilers for Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them, fluff, Scott-McCall centric, Reader centric.

Summary: Reader has been friends with Scott McCall for as long as she can remember. She’s also been in love with him for that long too. Now he’s single once again…

Notes: I’ve been watching Teen Wolf with my sister and tbh I’ve been in love with Scott McCall from the first episode and I finally thought, hey, I’d better write a fanfic about how much I love this adorable puppy. So here it is.

Word Count: 1,391

Posting Date:  2016-11-27

Current Date: 2017-05-31


Originally posted by teenwolf--imagines


Keep reading

<i>is this person actually abusive or is it just my bpd does this person actually hate me or is it just my bpd is this person actually obsessed with me or is it just my bpd is this person actually the greatest person to live or is it just my bpd do i actually hate this person or is it just my bpd</i>

anonymous asked:

Do u think Mary Drake will take the fall for Archers murder to save Spencer?

That seems to be a very big theory and truthfully, I could actually see it happening. I don’t think Mary is the greatest person lol but I do believe she loves Spencer and wants to protect her and I think based on the letter we heard, I think she’d give up the rest of her life to make up for what she did in the past

anonymous asked:

Heyo! I just finished reading your whole blog ;) and it was fabtastic! Anyways can I request the allies reacting to a s/o who subconsciously get closer to them / grabbing their arm when they are walking together out of habit? Gender neutral is fine:)

Ahhh~ I’ve added more~ That said, sorry for the delay!

America/Alfred F. Jones:

Alfred and _____ were walking rather peacefully together. They’d had a blast together at the carnival in town and were not calmly walking home. Alfred, being the hero he is, offered gallantly to walk _____ home. Even though they’d politely told him no, Alfred insisted and now the two were walking to _____’s place in peace.

Alfred was energetically walking next to ______, when they’d started getting closer to him.

Alfred didn’t pick up on this fact and continued on with his almost marching gait as _____ corrected their subconscious act.

When Alfred was just about to turn his head and excitedly tell ______ something, he noticed it, and a huge smile grew on his face. “_____!!”

This startled them, but they looked up at him in confusion, “erm… Yeah, sorry. I-”

Alfred’s smile grew even larger, and he grabbed poor, confused _____’s hand. “If you wanted me to protect you that way, all you had to do was ask!”

Their walk together continued, but this time Al was even more excited than before!

Ivan Braginsky/Russia:

Ivan had only wanted to do some light shopping for his home. And that’s what he had intended to do. If not for the fact that he’d found _____. He was happy, of course, but he was always much too nervous around them. Sure, they’d been in a relationship for a while now, but he didn’t want to risk anything.

But, here he was. He was walking home with _____ now. He was happy! Yeah!

But, he was also incredibly nervous. His palms only got sweatier when ______ unconsciously moved closer to him on the walk home. He gulped down saliva and his face quickly heated up, but he continued looking straight ahead.

When it happened again, it took all of his will power to not grab onto their hand with his much larger one.

He still wouldn’t want to risk anything. Not a single thing.

France/Francis Bonnefoy:

After a sweet, romantic date at a nice, but not unnecessarily expensive, restaurant, the evening closed with Francis and his (s/o), ______, walking home side by side. Although they were officially an item, it hadn’t been long into the relationship at all.

Francis hadn’t made a move on _____ either, rather, he was waiting for signs that it was okay to do so. He longed to hold their hand in his, but didn’t want to make them unbearably uncomfortable. So, he waited.

His waiting bore fruit when he realized ______ had gotten physically closer to him on their walk home from one of the best evenings they could’ve had together.

Francis, being the guy he was, wasted no time in clasping their hand in his own. He handsomely smiled down at them; no words were needed.

They’d not only gotten physically closer, but also mentally closer.

China/Yao Wang:

Yao moves incredibly slow in a relationship. It would be thought that he’d be a bit more fast in one, but he is as slow and dense as a tortoise when it comes to such things.

He would, however, recognize ______ getting closer to him on their walk home together from a festival.

He’d opted to not say anything until it happened for the third time. “______, just what are you doing, hm?”

“Ah! I’m sorry– it’s just a habit and–” _____’s face flushed as they’d said this. Their face flushed even more when Yao grabbed their hand with his.

Yao’s face was also slightly red, but he smiled at his (s/o). “There. Now you don’t need to worry about whether or not you’re too close.”

England/Arthur Kirkland:

“Ah, that was refreshing!” Arthur smiled at _____. “Did you enjoy yourself, _____?”

______ stepped together with Arthur, smiling up at him as they answered, “yes! The spa was incredibly refreshing!”

The duo had gone out to the spa for an escape from reality. Now they were on their way to the room they’d booked. They had to take an elevator up to the room. “Peculiar, isn’t it? But, it’s also quite quaint.”

Arthur’s (s/o) laughed at him, and accidentally moved closer to him as they did so. “S-Sorry!”

“What? What’s wrong?”

“I got… Um, I got closer to you– by accident!”

Arthur, slightly confused, stared at them. “Love, we’re a couple now. What are you so worried for?” A slight chuckle left his lips and he reached over to grip their waist from behind. “Don’t worry so much, all right?”

Canada/Matthew Williams:

Matthew always respected others personal space no matter what. He never tried to get in anybody’s way, and was pretty good at it. That went the same for his (s/o). Him and _____ were on their way home from a hockey game. Matthew’s team had one, and he was in pretty high spirits because of that!

He was on cloud 9, in all actuality. Here he had the greatest person in the world walking next to him, and his team had one their game. There’s no way that his day could get any better!

But, it did. Said greatest person in the world was unconsciously getting closer to him as they walked next to each other.

Matthew, in his gleeful state, reached for their hand, forgetting all about his love to respect personal space, and twirled them around.

“Today’s been great, _____!” He smiled boyishly.

______, after getting over their shock, could only agree with him. “Yes!”

anonymous asked:

fluffyjimon, blushyalec, hufflebee

@fluffyjimon okay but kinga is actually the greatest???? she’s actually so sweet and amazing and i love her a lot, she may argue with me a lot tbh but she’s actually the greatest person you’ll meet, if you’re not following her or talking to her, well you should change that and go do that right now, you won’t regret it!

@blushyalec look at my mom, getting mentioned again. good you deserve that tbh, honestly i could talk forever on how jules is so amazing, and just so kind, but it will take forever tbh. if ur not talking or following jules, get ur ass over to her blog and do that. 

@hufflebee so francy is amazing tbh, her writing is amazing and ya’ll should just give more love to it??? she deserves it tbh also she has a hella cute name so. 

Anonymously send me a url, and I’ll tell you what I think of them!

anonymous asked:

just finished reading steve's sorting and omg i LOVED it. i think i aspire to be that exact combination of gryffinpuff. anyways have you guys sorted the tortall heroines yet? i'm especially excited to read about kel cause she's my fave :)

(don’t tell; she’s my favorite too)

Alanna the Lioness is brash, fiercely stubborn, forward; she charges; and she inspires people to follow and to glorify her. This is the superpower of the Gryffindor Secondary and Alanna uses it well. People want to fall in step behind her, to tie their lives to hers. She is repeatedly flabbergasted by it—when Jon and his friends take her as one of their own, when the other pages see her as a “very small squire,” when she finds loyalty among the thieves of George’s court, among the Bazhir and her students, and when Liam follows her back to Tortall and fights for her king’s sake.

Yes, Jon, George, and Liam are all in love with Alanna, but they’re hardly alone in the way they want to follow, fight for her, and stand with her. It’s not about love—it’s about trust, a bit, and about awe. She is bright and brave and more herself than most people ever will be. It doesn’t make people feel safe, but there’s something about that genuineness that makes people want to be better.

When people hate her it’s almost always because they realize they can’t change her (Roger, the shaman in WwRlaM).

As shining bright as the lion on her shield and sleeve is, however, Alanna is a Slytherin Primary. Alanna’s knighthood isn’t, as it will be for Kel years later, about helping people. This isn’t about doing right, or good, or kindly—this is about what Alanna wants. It is ambition, selfishness, and strength. People have told her what she is allowed and what she isn’t and Alanna’s whole life has had an edge of one big long “screw you.” A well-adjusted Slytherdor, charging at what they want, tends to get it — and to leave the world changed in their wake.

Daine Sarrasri, the Wildmage, is a Ravenclaw Primary who borrows other peoples’ systems wholesale. Her greatest terror is often that she is insane, her mind and thoughts untrustworthy. This isn’t a unique fear to Ravenclaw Primaries, but it’s certain a point in favor of that sorting. She has a Gryffindor Secondary—she charges and she hates holding her tongue.

Daine’s Ravenclaw Primary doesn’t build itself, but rather borrows from the people she loves and trusts. As a girl, she takes on her mom’s Puff system but views it as a deal—you help your community and they will help you. A social contract. When her home is attacked, no one comes to help in the aftermath even though her mother would’ve helped them. This is the first broken system that sends her spiralling. She is reticent and lost until she gains enough faith in and camaraderie with her people in Tortall to begin taking on their systems of how the world should work.

And once she accepts a system, she can be confused and horrified when other people don’t also subscribe to it. In Realms, when her parents and then the dragons hesitate to help her friends back in Tortall, she tears into them with fervor.

Daine ‘Falls’ after her mother’s death— and then she falls again when Numair “dies” in Emperor Mage. That Daine’s greatest spirals come after personal loss looks rather Slytherin, actually— but Daine is not petrifying. This is not a Slytherin’s fall. She’s not terrified of losing people or of giving herself emotional vulnerabilities. In both these cases, the system she was trusting betrays her.

She was following her mother’s system of caring and community building and then her community turned on her. In Ozorne’s court she tries on the system of diplomacy and statework that the ambassadors from Tortall promise her will work. She sits on her Gryffindor Secondary and her dislike for the situation, trusting that they know what they’re doing and that they have a valid model of the world for her to follow. If they follow all the rules of the diplomatic party, everything will be alright. And then Ozorne executes Numair and Daine snaps.

She drops that system and goes on a roaring rampage of revenge, letting nothing but her fury and her Gryffindor Secondary decide her moves. Getting Numair back calms her and brings her back from her Fall—but she doesn’t reclaim the ambassador’s trust-the-system mindset.

Daine finally ends up with a model that seems to be an updated version of her mother’s Puff— the service and the defense of the people who need it, but without the ‘fair trade’ expectation she had had in her youth. She no longer expects people to fight for her the way she fights for them. Tortall is hers and she will defend her new home through any struggle.

This isn’t a deal, a back and forth. This is about doing your best for the people around you. This system is self-contained, relying only on her actions and not on anyone else’s reciprocation or honor, which makes it much stabler than her previous models. Daine takes Tortall as her own and surrounds herself with brave, fervent people just as willing to spend their lives in its defense.

Alanna’s greatest climaxes were all personal—she saved Jon. She lost Faithful, lost Thom, killed Roger. It was about those close connections, about the way she wanted her life to be (not the way she thinks it *should* be)—but Kel’s battles will all be for other people, for wider swathes of people who are “hers” because she owes them something.

Kel’s greatest crises are about bullies, being there for Lalasa, scorning the Chamber for its undignified heartlessness, saving her people. She fights different battles than Alanna—Raoul even has that speech about it. Alanna is a hero, but Kel is a commander. Alanna is a Slytherin Primary, and Kel is a Hufflepuff.

Kel’s morality is comprehensive and intuitive and it’s based completely and entirely on people. She will betray her sworn lord, her word, and even the greater cause of the war in order to save the “small” she feels responsible for. In Lady Knight, she even insists on honoring and humanizing the enemy dead — learning to see some people as not worth her empathy was almost part of Kel’s growth.

Like Alanna, she is an inspiration without any attempt to be that kind of symbol. She changes the face of page training, and not just because of her gender—when Kel starts fighting against the hazing, the other pages rise up with her. When she goes after her people in Lady Knight, she ends up with a whole army she didn’t ask for at her back. She wins over the King’s Own without trying to do anything more than a good job, coming out after four years with not just their camaraderie but their respect and allegiance. For all that communities spontaneously form around Kel, she’s no Puff Secondary. She leads.

Kel is a good example of the potential of the Gryffindor Secondary to be subtle. She is quiet. She holds her tongue and her emotions in check so much that her bullies nickname her ‘The Lump.”

This reticence is something that comes from the cultural context of her childhood, growing up in the Yamani Isles. It’s something she finds useful but she puts aside her quiet, seeming calm when her need to speak out or act against injustice rises its head—standing up and demanding an explanation at Joren’s trial is a good example.

She is quiet, careful, often respectful, but she is always and entirely herself. It’s why she considers turning down Wyldon’s offer at the start of First Test. It’s not a fair offer, and by accepting the probation she feels like she is accepting and complicit with the system. What finally changes her mind is an appeal to her Hufflepuff Primary: this will make her better able to help people who need helping, and that’s more important than anything. So she accepts the offer and wears dresses (which she hates) to the pages’ hall to show the world she is unashamed of being a girl.

Aly is a Slytherin/Slytherin, which I’m sure everyone’s just shocked about. When Aly decides to stay for the rebellion, it’s not because her understanding of the raka’s oppression has deepened—Aly has fallen in love with Ulasim, Junai, Chenoal, Sarai, and Dove and that is what makes her little Slytherin heart finally dedicate itself wholly and forever to the cause.

It’s about people— these specific faces and what they want and need— and it’s about the challenge. The House of ambition, remember? Kyprioth, a wily old Slytherin/Slytherin himself, knew exactly what buttons to press on little old Aly.

(Kyprioth is a good example of a Slytherin with a massive inner circle—he’s not bonded to a handful of individuals, but a whole people. This seeming group-bonding does not make him a Hufflepuff—this is not about community, about service, about need, or about the basic humanity of all. This is about possession. They are his and they will be great again).

Aly’s Slytherin Secondary is pretty self-explanatory— she delights in manuever, subterfuge, quick-thinking, espionage. The books are titled ‘Trickster.’ It’s hard to get much more Slytherin than Aly Homewood.

Beka Cooper is an Idealist Primary, not a loyalist. If one of her Rat breakfast buddies broke the law, she’d turn them in and not for a Hufflepuff’s ‘greater good.’ Arrest is what happens when you commit a crime and get caught. Beka would lose far more sleep over helping a beloved friend skip out on their arrest than she would locking them up in the first place. (This is supported also by the way she deals with *spoiler* in the last book. It doesn’t matter that they are one of hers). When she takes in the kids in the first book, it’s not out of empathy, pity, or kindness, but because she feels responsible.

But which Idealist? Gryffindor or Ravenclaw? Something that muddies the water here is her strong Ravenclaw Secondary. The very format of the story calls to that secondary— Beka is keeping her journal because she wants to practice and hone her skills of observation and maintaining data. She goes after things with deliberation and empiricism even inside her own head. She is not easily swayed by emotional appeals or smooth talkers. The strength of her Ravenclaw Secondary makes her idealist primary house look a bit more built than I think it is.

Beka’s got a powerful moral compass. It follows her from situation to situation and adjusts easily and well to new conflicts without seeming to have a rigorous pre-built structure. When she is presented with hard calls, she makes them. She knows what feels right in most situations and she goes after those aims with both a single-minded terrier stubborness and all her constructed, logical skills and data analysis. Gryffindor Primary, Ravenclaw Secondary.

– Alanna - Slytherin Primary, Gryffindor Secondary Daine - Ravenclaw Primary (who occassionally Falls), Gryffindor Secondary Kel - Hufflepuff Primary, Gryffindor Secondary Aly - Slytherin Primary, Slytherin Secondary Beka - Gryffindor Primary, Ravenclaw Secondary

The sensation you get when you’re in love with someone is incredibly intoxicating. It’s truly a phenomenal feeling that I’ve never really experienced before until recently. In the past I’d tell you that I was in love. But looking back on it, the magnitude of thoughts and emotions I put out are nothing to what I feel now. She’s actually the single greatest person I’ve ever met and I honestly mean that from the bottom of my heart. After spending a lot of time with her, I started to notice the little things. That’s really what I started falling in love with first. Her laugh, smile, eyes, freckles, voice, the way she talks, types, eats, her sense of style and fashion. I could go on forever.

It feels as if I’ve known her for thousands of years. I thought it was impossible to find somebody who can understand my thoughts and complexities perfectly like she does. I thought it was impossible to find somebody who has a personality and sense of humour that is a perfect match for mine. I thought it was impossible to find somebody as beautiful and breathtakingly gorgeous as she is both inside and out. I thought it was impossible to find somebody perfect like her. But here’s what actually is impossible - There are over 150,000 English words, over 6,000 languages and none of them could possibly string together words that could describe how much I love her and how much she means to me.

I want to spend the rest of my days with her. I want to share our laughs and our silly moments together. I want to be there for her when things get rough. I want to be her number one supporter, ensure that she succeeds and always does her best. I want to push for what’s best for her and make any sacrifices necessary for her happiness. I want to be there for her when she’s sick and hold her in my arms, never let go and make everything okay. I want to be the one who’ll dry her tears away when she’s sad. I want to show her just how beautiful and special she is to me. I want to give her my everything and show her the world. Abbiegale, I know you’re reading this. Just know that I love you more than anything and I miss you and I can’t wait to see you and wrap you in my arms.

SMH as things people have said to me (since everyone is doing these kinds of things)
  • Jack: Sometimes I can't tell if you're joking or not and it really fucks me up.
  • Bitty: Your southern ancestors are rolling over in their graves at you pronouncing it puh-cahn.
  • Shitty: Did you know your grandmother was the one who taught me how to sort the seeds out of the weed? She taught me how to roll a joint, too.
  • Lardo: Sometimes I think da Vinci just tried to see how gay he could make his paintings without getting caught.
  • Ransom: I think I have everyone I've ever met as a friend on Facebook. Is that not normal?
  • Holster: I think I'm mostly straight? Probably like 95% straight. I don't know, but I would totally bang my best friend, okay?
  • Nursey: Wanna hold my hand and pretend to be dating to piss off that homophobic guy that's always preaching the Bible outside of the dining hall?
  • Dex: I think it's pretty awesome how we became friends because we hated everyone else that lived on our floor.
  • Chowder: I feel like if I had to live with you I would go crazy.
  • Whiskey: You don't actually have to be the greatest person in the world. You just have to, you know, not suck.
  • Tango: Is it a bad idea to microwave raw bacon for like, 5 minutes?
  • Johnson: It's accepted knowledge that we know for certain some things. But have you ever thought about how exactly we know what we know? Like, the color blue. How do we know that it's the color blue for everyone? What if my color blue is actually your color red, but we just learned the same name for it so it's called blue to both of us?
  • Kent: If your cat is missing after I leave, don't check my bag.
In a sense, the two of them have been wandering the Earth, totally isolated, because they have such a specific and elevated mentality. Not identical, but it is as if not only are you the greatest chess player on the planet, you’re actually the only person on the planet that can play chess. And then suddenly you walk into a room one day and there’s a guy playing chess. I think that’s how they feel about each other.
—  Hugh Dancy