author: @broodybell pairing: dylan x reader word count: 3,738
warnings: nsfw aT ALL THIS IS SO SINFUL I’M NOT EVEN SORry
authors note: i was gonna keep this fluffy, but we all know it’s pretty impossible for me to not write sin for dylan, so here you go!! also i apologise for how dirty this got. fUCK. and thanks to my bby @sabrinas-wolves for helping me with this and the puthey… and this is dylan pov
summary: dylan finally comes home after months away for filming. him and reader can’t keep their hands off each other and dylan learns how reader kept herself satisfied when he was away.
my baby: text me when you’re on your way home so i can start dinner xo
dyl pickle: will do xx
I shove my phone back into my pocket with a smile and rub my hands together eagerly. It had been five months since I’d been home, which also meant five long, agonisingly lonely months since I last saw Y/N. Admittedly, I’d much rather be home with her right now, either fucking the shit out of her, or holding her close to my chest as I wash her hair in the bath tub. She always loved corny shit like that. But unfortunately, I wasn’t. I was in my dressing room, waiting with T-Pose to be interviewed with Ellen DeGeneres.
“Yo, you’ll be home soon Dyl, chill.” Hoech teases with dancing eyebrows and I scoff playfully at him. My knee continues to jitter up and down and I pat a beat onto my thighs. “Ty, I just miss her man.” I groan, rubbing my hands over my face in attempt to rid her from my thoughts, but it was no use. The thought of her withering beneath my body was doing questionable things to my sanity, and I was honestly beginning to have trouble hiding it.
My phone vibrates from my pocket and I dig through my tight jeans to retrieve it, my eyes scanning over the new text that displayed across my screen.
my baby: oh forgot to say, have fun in the interview baby. i’ll be watching… in that matching lingerie set you like ;) xx
My eyes widen, my pants suddenly becoming extremely tight as I imagine her sprawled across the couch, white lace adorning her curves as she- “Dyl, we’re on!” Tyler snaps me from my thoughts, my throat suddenly very dry and my hands clammy. I quickly stuff my phone back into my pockets, wiping my sweaty palms into my jeans and standing from my seat.
I awkwardly adjust my pants, digging into my boxers to quickly pull my hard on up and into the waistband of my pants. I follow Tyler out of the dressing room and through a long hallway until we make it out on stage, loud cheers emitting from the crowd. I smile happily, waving to the audience before I greeted Ellen with a peck on the cheek.
Tyler and I flail onto the couch as the cheering slowly dies down and I suddenly feel awfully nervous. In my last interview, I was asked verb personal questions in which my answers were taken out of context, twisted, and published online- which, ultimately caused a lot of drama.
“My two favorite boys. How are you both? I understand you’ve only just got finished filming for Teen Wolf?” Ellen asks, lifting one leg to rest on her other thigh. I nod my head with a smile whilst Tyler answers her question. I keep a smile on my face, laughing at some things Tyler says until he’s finished talking.
Ellen’s attention turns to me as Tyler leans further back into the couch, arms outstretched over his head as he looks to me with a grin. “It must be very hard for you though, right? All this time away from home?” She asks with concern and I sigh with wide eyes, nodding my head in confirmation.
“It’s great, you know, working on set with everyone. But five months is a long time from home and it does get very difficult.” I nod, Tyler watching me and nodding in agreement at my statement. “Is that why you take your pillow with you?” Ellen questions, a series of photos of myself carrying the blue pillow close to me. I chuckle at the photos; most of them taken after I’d been on a flight or even just walking around on set.
“It’s funny you say that, actually. It’s not my pillow.” I laugh, Ellen’s eyebrows raising quizzically. “Did you just steal someone’s pillow on a plane?” She laughs, and I laugh with her but shake my head from side to side. “No, it’s my girlfriends. We have this thing that when I leave for filming; I’ll take her pillow and she keeps mine.” I shrug my shoulders, smiling at the memory of Y/N coming up with the idea.
It was a smart idea. It was a sense of home I had with me when I was away, and also a piece of her. I remember how she told me she’d always sleep in my clothes when I were away because it felt like I was holding her. So when she started sleeping with my pillow when I’d left, she didn’t feel so alone and felt more like I was with her.
The audience awe at my confession, a small blush creeping onto my cheeks and the excitement to rush back home to her suddenly grows stronger. “That is awfully sweet. Do uh, do you guys FaceTime or Skype while you’re away?” Ellen asks, her smile growing when I nod my head. “All of the time. A lot of people say that we’re still in that honeymoon phase, despite that we’ve been together for almost five years now.” I chuckle, Tyler slapping my chest as he smiles at me.
Before I met Y/N, I was what Tyler called a man-whore. I’d sleep with girls but had no intentions of being there when they woke up. The last serious relationship I had was with Britt, I was falling hard for her but she treated me like shit. It wasn’t until I met Y/N at Tyler’s birthday six years ago and I saw how poorly her boyfriend treated her. It opened my eyes about my situation, and eventually I left Britt. Two months later, Y/N was having trouble with her boyfriend. Tyler and I went to pick her up so she could stay with us until they worked things out. They never did, and she never left - only when we decided to get a place together, three years later.
“The pillow idea is very sweet, actually.” Ellen coos, and I smile at her, shrugging my shoulders. “It’s a comfort thing.”
The rest of the interview flew by, and I don’t know if that was due to the fact that I had zoned out after talking about the pillow, or because my excitement to see my baby was so powerful I managed to speed up time. Before I knew it, I was climbing out of the taxi and dragging my bags toward the front door of the house. I dig my fingers into my jeans, pulling out my keys and quickly unlocking the door, throwing my bags inside before I follow and slam the door behind me.
“Baby!?” I call out, kicking my shoes off and throwing my keys into the glass bowl on the table. I smile at my surrounds, warmth coating me at the feeling of finally being home. “Dylan!” Y/N’s sweet voice calls out to me, my smile immediately growing. She races down the stairs, her silky nightgown slipping open as she jumped into my arms, her legs around my waist, arms around my neck and her face nuzzled into my chest. I squeeze her body closer to mine, as I hold her from her middle. “Fuck, I missed you.” She groans, her head moving from my chest and I finally take a close look at her after so long.
Her hair was pinned up messily and her face free of makeup, but I swear I’ve never seen her look more beautiful. Her smile was the light of my life, seeing that gorgeous smile could make the worst day better in the blink of an eye. “I missed you too, baby.” I smile, my eyes beginning to water and she pouts at me playfully. “Dyl, don’t cry. You’re home now. And I would say dinner is served, but you didn’t call to say you were on your way home. Do you want to order pizza?” She asks, the soft pads of her thumbs gently rubbing beneath my eyes to dry them.
I hold her wrists in my hands, nuzzling my cheek into her small hands and stroking my thumb against the back of it. “Pizza sounds good.” I smile, nodding my head slightly. A wave of tiredness washes over me and I yawn loudly into her hand. “Do you want to go take a nap? We can order food later, it’s only 7?” Y/N asks, noticing the tiredness that was written all over my face. “Can you take a nap with me?” I ask, and her smile grows. She nods her head, turning and walking away, but I grab hold of her hand- “Wait just a second.”- and pull her back to me, her chest smacking into mine. Before she could even comprehend what was happening, I was holding her soft face in my big palms and pressing my lips against hers.
Her eyes fluttered closed and slowly, she melted into the kiss; her arms wrapping around my neck as I held her by her waist. She hums against my lips, fingers teasing my hair and my hands slowly leave her cheeks, finding their way to the back of her head, my fingers tangled into her hair as I press her harder against me. I tug gently at her hair, a soft gasp slipping from her parted lips, and I take the opportunity to slither my tongue into her mouth. She groans at the action, her wet tongue massaging my own and a low whine emits from her lips.
“I thought you wanted to take a nap?” She mumbles, her words muffled by my mouth and my hands leave her hair, running down her waist until they knead her ass through the silky material of her robe. Y/N whimpers, her back arching, ass pressing harder into my hand and her chest presses closer against mine. I hum back in appreciation, squeezing her ass harder and sliding my hands beneath her robe. “But I want you more.” I growl, my hands resting beneath her thighs as I lift her from the ground.
She wraps her legs around my waist, my hands around her ass. Y/N tugs at my hair, lips messily crashing together as I carry her up the stairs, our sloppy kiss never breaking until I kick the door open, throwing her onto the bed. She lays on her back, leaning on her elbows. Her hair was sprawled out around her, her rode wide open and I stare down at her hungrily. Not wasting another second, I tore my shirt off my torso, unbuttoning my pants as they slide down my legs and I step out of them; the tent in my boxers growing.
She wiggles in the sheets, the sweet melody of her giggle erupting from her lips as I crawl between her open legs. Her hands tangle into my hair, pulling me closer to her with a smirk on her face, slowly pressing her lips against mine. I roll my hips into hers, a sexy whine echoing through the room as Y/N bucks her hips up and into mine, loving the feeling of my hard cock pressing against her panties. The harder I pressed myself into her, the wetter my boxers became, her arousal seeping through her lace. With both my hands on either side of her head, I move one down to her shoulder, my finger gently tracing over her skin as I slowly nudged her bra strap down along with the soft silk of her robe.
My lips soon followed, and I pressed featherlight kisses to the skin my finger previously touched. The back of her head fell into the pillow, her back arching into my chest as I continued to roll my hips into hers. I groan as the sudden wetness on my boxers seethed through the fabric and lubricated my cock. “Fuck, you’re absolutely dripping.” I growl, another whine leaving her lips and I pulled away from her. She looks to me with furrowed eyebrows, watching as I climbed off the bed. Her eyes train onto the aching tent in my boxers and the darkened patch of her wetness, her cheeks flushing crimson.
I tug my boxers down, a relieved sigh falling from my tongue as my cock sprung free. “Hm, baby.” Y/N whines, wetting her swollen lips as she watches me wrap my hand around my wet cock, pumping myself as I watched her absentmindedly roll her hips against the air. I release my aching erection, crawling back onto the foot of the bed. I lean over, looping my fingers into her panties and slowly pulling them down her silky legs and setting them beside me. “God, I missed your pretty little pussy, baby.” My attention fixated between her legs, the way it glistened with arousal in the dark.
I slid toward her, snaking my arms around her thighs as I pried them as far open as possible, my breath hot on her heat and she whimpered in frustration. I dip my face between her legs, my stubble scratching against her thighs and her fingers grip at my hair, her chest heaving in excitement. I look up to her through my lashes, our eyes meeting as I wink at her before shoving my face into her pussy. Y/N moans filthily, back arching and eyes fluttering closed. I flatten my tongue between her folds, teasing her entrance as I lick a stripe up to her clit, groaning at the sweet taste of her arousal. She inhales a sharp breath as I suck her clit into my warm mouth, rubbing my tongue against it as she rolls her hips into my face.
“Fuck, Dylan. That feels s-so fuc-fucking good, baby.” Her filthy moans and words caused my cock to twitch against the sheets. I release her thighs, one hand travelling down my body and I grip my cock, grunted in satisfaction as I pump myself to the pace she rolled her hips. My other hand travels between Y/N’s legs, my index finger swirling between her folds, collecting her juices and she whimpers loudly. I pull away from her pussy, my chin dripping with her arousal and her back collapses back into the bed. I crawl further up her body, my hard cock sliding through her folds, my tip grazing against her sensitive clit and she gasps.
“Open your mouth, baby.” I speak, my voice low and eyes hooded. I lift my finger to her mouth and push it past her parted lips. She clamped her mouth around my finger, sucking her wetness off it and swirling her tongue around my digit. “Oh, fuck. You’re so sexy.” I whimper, gently rolling my hips into hers, revelling in the feeling of my cock sliding through her folds. Y/N hummed around my finger, as I pull it out of her mouth and press my lips against hers feverishly.
With my lips still meshing with hers, my hand leans over the bed, opening the bedside table drawer. I disconnect our lips, looking over to the open drawer in search of a condom, but I find something else. My cock twitches at the sight, my eyes darkening as lust and desire consumes my every emotion. I grab the rubber in my hand and pull back to her, my face hovering over hers. “Did you find a condom?” Y/N asks, her voice a low whine and her hands run up and down my chest.
I stare down at her. “I found a lot more than a condom.” My voice was rough as I tried to contain my excitement. Y/N furrows her eyebrows at my words, her eyes following my hand that was by her side and when she notices what I was holding, her cheeks darken red in embarrassment. “Is this what you’ve been using to get yourself off whilst I’ve been gone? Huh? Using it and pretending it was me fucking you. Were you screaming my name, baby?” I ask, my eyebrow raised and she nods slowly, swallowing thickly. A pang of arousal shoots through me at the thought of her fucking herself with an inanimate object.
“Are you mad, daddy?” She asks slowly, noticing my sudden change in facial expression and her hand slowly creeps between our bodies until she finds the dildo by her hip. “No, kitten. Daddy’s not mad. In fact, daddy wants you to show him.” I smirk, her jaw slacking as she stares up at me in disbelief. “Be a good girl, show daddy what you did when he was away. Show daddy how you fucked your tight little pussy with it.” An uncontrollable moan shamelessly slips from her lips, her hand tightly gripping on the rubber beside her. My hand travels between our bodies, wrapping around her hand and guiding it between her legs.
She adjusts her grip on it, and I guide her hand up and down, her wetness lubricating the rubber and she moans in satisfaction. “Come on, baby. Show daddy.” I whisper, releasing her hand and pulling away from her completely. I crawl off the bed, taking her panties into my hand and sitting back in the armchair that faced the foot of the bed. I watched as Y/N touched herself, my cock throbbing at the sight of her pretty pussy smothered in her own arousal, and I wanted nothing more than to eat her out for hours, to taste her sweetness on my tongue again.
“Fuck.” Her soft whimper caught my attention, but my eyes remain gazing at her tight pussy and the way she rubbed the rubber cock between her folds. I growl at the sight, my grip on Y/N’s panties tightening before I carefully unbunch the delicate lace in my hand, holding the crotch in my palm before grabbing my cock. The wetness of her panties worked as a sweet lubricant as I began to pump myself, watching her whimper and moan. “Does that feel good, baby?” I ask her teasingly, eyes never leaving her pussy as she continues to rub herself. She hums in response, slowly dipping the rubber cock into her tight cunt and I whimper at the sight, watching as her back arched off the sheets and a filthy whine left her lips.
“God, you’re so fucking sexy.” I growl, pumping my cock faster with my bottom lip tugged between my teeth and I watch her intently. Her grasp on the dildo had tightened as she relentlessly fucked herself with it, long whines spilling from her lips and she thrusted her hips into her hand. “I want you to pretend that’s my cock, baby. Imagine it’s me fucking your wet pussy, hitting all those deep spots as I play with your clit.” I growl, turning myself on even more. Her legs begin to shake, her hand thrusting the cock into her relentlessly and a filthy whine sounds through the room. I tear my hand away from my pulsating cock, dropping her panties to the ground.
I stomped toward her, snatching the dildo out of her pussy and she shrieks in pleasure. I leave it on the bed, crawling between her legs and pressing my lips against hers harshly. She whimpers at the feeling, her legs wrapping around my legs and she pushes me off her, causing me to roll over to my side of the bed. “You fucking ass, I was- I was ab-about to cum.” She breathes frantically, trying to catch her breath and I smirk at her, watching as she straddled my waist. “But daddy didn’t say you could cum, did he?” I retort, authority laced in my voice and she pouts down at me.
My cock slid between her folds as she teasingly rolled her hips against mine. “Daddy, I want you to make me cum.” Y/N whimpers, her legs already beginning to shake. “Ride me.” I growl, her eyes lighting up with excitement and she steadies herself onto her knees, my cock standing at attention as she slowly sinks down on my length. I hiss at the feeling, her tight walls stretching out as I filled her. “Fuck, daddy you’re so big.” Y/N whines sexily, my hands gripping at her hips as I thrust up into her.
“Shit, kitten. You’re so tight, god you feel fucking amazing.” I cry out, snapping my hips into hers at a merciless pace, grunting at the feeling of her tight walls clenching around me. “Dylan, oh Dylan, that feels so good. Don’t stop!” Y/N screams, her legs shaking either side of me as her perky tits bounced at each thrust. I could’ve came at the sight, but I wanted nothing more than to feel her finish all over me. “I’m so fucking close, daddy. I’m gonna cum!” Her voice was raised, face contorted and I swear I’d ever seen her look so beautiful.
“Cum for daddy, cum all over my big cock, baby.” I encourage, thrusting harder and faster until her walls clenched around me, her warm arousal coating my cock and a pornographic moan screamed from her lungs. My eyes widen at the noise, my release following as hot spurts of cum shot through her and she slowly stopped rocking her hips against mine, lifting herself off me and crashing into the sheets. “That was the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen, or heard.” I swallow thickly, turning to the sleepy girl as a lazy smile tugged at her lips. “Sure was, daddy.” She teases, my smile growing as I pull her into my arms.
“Can we take that nap now?” I ask after a few minutes of silence had passed. I wait for an answer, my head shifting to look down at her. Y/N was cuddled into my side, eyes slid shut as her soft breaths gently blew over my chest. I smiled down at her, sitting up slightly to pull a blanket over us and her grasp on my torso tightens subconsciously. I smile down at her, tugging the covers over us and relaxing back into her arms. My lips gently press against her hair, a satisfied, yet tired sigh leaving my lips.
“I love you, baby.” I whisper, holding her as close as I possibly could. “I love you, too, Dylan.” Her weak voice spoke and my eyes slowly fluttered closed with a content smile tugging at my lips.
summary :in which you and Zoe are dying your hair and try to convince Connor to dye his.
request :“Could you write some Connor Murphy imagine where he is a virgin and the reader isn’t and it’s some smut.”
word count :7,007
warnings :boy oh boy is this gonna be a sMUT HNNGGGFFFF, y’all can’t have a smut w/o a hella lotta sexual innuendos, cursing, mentions blood?, ooc writing, rushed writing, terrible writing in general;;,,,,,
a / n : Inspired by when I dyed my hair and was super lazy per usual and stained my pillowcase. i’m such a sinner… Is it just me or did my writing change completely like halfway through it? idk it’s bad, sorry. Thanks for reading though. Any sort of support is sincerely respected: liking, commenting, reblogging, following, anything! Constructive criticism is always appreciated :) Much love.
“What the alien cult shit is going on?” Connor asked with a very pissed and very confused expression.
He had just walked past the bathroom when he saw his sister sitting on a chair with strands of hair sectioned off into tubes of tin foil. Y/N, his girlfriend was standing beside Zoe with purple hands. Purple? Blue? Indigo.
“It’s the devil himself,” Zoe said sarcastically.
“You little bi-”
“Zoe,” You cut off Connor rapidly, “if anything he’s a handsome devil.”
“…Fuck you,” Connor mumbled, crossing his arms, and leaning against the doorframe.
“Y/N, you’re gross,” Zoe groaned. You snapped your indigo stained gloves off.
“Grossly in love,” you sang, walking over to Connor and tapping him on the nose. His scowl softened just slightly. Zoe simply groaned.
“I literally cannot have a single day without sharing you,” Zoe slapped the bathroom counter with both hands, “Y/N, you’re supposed to be my best friend. If anything, you’re like my sister and that’d be super weird to think of my sister dating my brother.”
He would be happy knowing that you both got to that cliche but absolutely necessary and adorable stage in your relationship where he would find you in his hoodie. You would be standing in the kitchen, cooking of course, when he came in and absolutely melted at the sight of you.
He would blush and just watch you in awe, making small noises before speaking up to praise every fiber of your being.
“You look so cute jagiya~! I can’t believe you’re wearing my hoodie, you should wear it all the time.”
He would secretly love it, but he would scold you for not asking to borrow it, considering it was his go to hoodie. When he found you, you were asleep on the couch. The scent of him lingering on his hoodie was enough to calm your nerves and put you to sleep while watching an episode of your favorite show on netflix. He’d wake you up whining.
“Jagi, who told you to take my hoodie; that was my favorite one. What if I get cold?”
You would just blink at him for having woke you, before you pull him down on the couch to take a nap with you, shushing his pouts.
He would be ecstatic. He didn’t know what it was besides your absolute glow, but he would love coming home to see you wearing his hoodie. You would offer to wash it and give it back but this boy would be ready to argue with you if you even thought about taking it off. He would make you pose and he would take a billion and one pictures of you before offering you other hoodies he owned for you to wear. He would offer to freeze to death in the case that you were the bearer of his hoodies because he thought you looked sooooo good in them.
“Just like that jagi, yes, work it, pose.”
Namjoon (Rap Monster)
He would find it really comforting that you were wearing something of his. In his mind it would be his way to know that you were going to be his for a very long time. Seeing how comfortable you were in it, and how it fit you so well made him instantly stride over to you and pull you into a hug. He would honestly just hold you for warmth and pull you onto the couch or to bed to just cuddle while you wore it. The two of you ended up taking a nap as he fell intoxicated with the smell of you lingering on his hoodie. He loved it and he loved you.
“You can keep it if you want baby, I don’t mind.”
He would get so fluffy about it. He would just blush and stare at you. Especially since you were wearing shorts underneath that made you look so adorable to him. He would just think to himself how did he get so lucky to have someone like you wearing his clothes. There was no ounce of minding because he would just start offering for you to wear his jackets and hoodies more often. There was no helping the fact that you were going to be swamped in kisses and hugs by him once he saw you in his apparel.
“How is my kitten so adorable?”
V would be taken aback. Not thinking that he would catch you wearing his clothes. But there you were, on your phone, wearing his hoodie nonchalantly. He would wrap his arm around your waist and kiss your temple, mumbling about how good you looked wearing something of his. He would want to take you out, and show the world that you were his. He genuinely believed that this was a mark of an official relationship goal and he was not going to be wasting the opportunity to show the world what your status was together; the hoodie stealing phase.
“Let me take you out tonight babygirl and show you off.”
He would be a mess. He would also be the one to melt at the sight of you, and would instantly snap pictures. The filters would be filled with hearts and he’d make that his new phone background. The amount of kisses you’d get all over your face that night was ridiculous and after being swooned by your actions, would just want to cuddle you in a little ball on the couch while watching a movie or something. He just wanted to hold you close because he loved the feeling of knowing that you were his and only his and would just die at the fact that you found comfort in wearing something of his.
Tupac Shakur photographed by David LaChapelle, April 1996.
David LaChapelle: “Tupac was great, he was very sensitive and is truly a good person. I wrote to his mum when he died and she sent me flowers and gave me his last song, “Ghetto Gospel.” When we did the shoot, he had just come out of prison and every shot has a reason, it’s never random, so this was the idea of the photo shoot, him becoming clean. He had given this interview when he was still in prison and he really opened up and was so honest. I had read it and thought it was so truthful so for the work I did with him, there was this idea of washing away and rebirth. And we did another shoot where he posed as a slave on a cotton field. They traced rapping and rhyming to “call and repeat” during slavery time in sugar cane and cotton fields to pass the time. It’s on the Hotel LaChapelle book. Tupac came to the shoot 2 hours early, which was very unusual for a rapper. So I wasn’t ready for the shoot and he didn’t care. He reminded me of my black friends whom I went to art schools with, he was so cool, open-minded and chill. He wasn’t judgmental. Then later on, I found out that he had gone to an art school. He left behind a big bag of socks and underwear because he had just come out from prison and never picked it up. He died shortly after. I still wear his socks sometimes (laughs).”
(aka “Everything else is in the laundry and people loved this at Aunt Judy’s wedding, so I’m sure it’ll work fine for the grocery story”
(Or it’s an actual, genuine ENTJ-Powerwalk-move, peasant, bow-kinda Day™ in which case… run))
2) Pokémon Trainer
3) Airy, Fluttery, Gone with The Wind
(aka “Strolling along the beach like an 18th century artist in a midlife crisis, who AM I!? What is LIFE? I don’t know, but I do know that my fluttering shirt makes me look better when I strike a pose while asking”)
4) Ogres Have Layers
(aka “I want this hoodie to swallow me, I am a head, Watson, the rest of me is a mere appendix, Watson, what do you mean I can’t pull off the brooding stranger with my hood up and earphones in-look, Watson, it’s not my fault I didn’t get to wash my hair because SOMEONE took forever to style their moustache, Watson”)
5) I Saw This In An Anime
6) Flannels aux Winchester
(aka “And together we’re gonna run around, sweatpants, we’re gonna… do all kinds of wonderful things, sweatpants. Just you and me, sweatpants. The outside world is our enemy, sweatpants… we’re the only…. friends we’ve got, sweatpants! It’s just INTP and sweatpants. INTP and sweatpants and their adventures, sweatpants.. INTP AND SWEATPANTS FOREVER AND FOREVER A HUNDRED YEARS INTP and sweatpants.. and INTP and sweatpants runnin’ around and… INTP and sweatpants time… a- all day long forever.. all a - a hundred days INTP and sweatpants! forever a hundred times…. OVER and over INTP and sweatpants… adventures dot com.. W W W dot at INTP and sweatpants dot com w..w..w… INTP and sweatpants adventures.. ah- hundred years….. every minute INTP and sweatpants dot com…. w w w a hundred times… INTP and sweatpants dot com…….”
The story behind the dishes picture dated March 1975.
“The Year was 1974. I was an elementary school teacher who had temporarily left my teaching career to return to the University of Utah to earn a Master of Education Degree. I began attending church in a “student branch” (a congregation of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, comprised of unmarried college students.) It was there that I met four young men who shared an apartment not far from my home : Wynn Bartholomew, John Homer, Larry Anderson, and Barry Kraus. Wynn was attending law school at the University of Utah. The apartment where these four men lived was quite large, and became the “social center” or “gathering place” for many of the members of our branch : We went there often for parties.
John Homer and Larry Anderson were “stake missionaries” at the time. One day Wynn told John and Larry about a student at the Law School who was possibly a potential convert and who might be interested in having religious discussions with them; his name was Ted Bundy. John and Larry began giving religious lessons to Ted at their apartment. They invited Ted to come to church and meet the rest of the congregation; Ted was always invited to the apartment for social gatherings as well.
Eventually Ted committed to being baptized. Many members of the student branch attended the baptism to show their support. Our branch president, Michael Preece, interviewed Ted prior to baptism… John Homer performed the baptism and his missionary companion, Larry Anderson, pronounced the confirmation. Little did anyone know what dark secrets Ted was hiding!
The ratio of women to men in our student branch was about 4 to 1, so new men coming to our branch were always of interest, and Ted was no exception. He was polite, courteous, intelligent, and attractive. Many of the young women wanted to date Ted; he became quite popular in our group. Ted attended some of our social gatherings, and afterwards, Wynn remembered that to him, Ted seemed quiet and mysterious; at social gatherings he would sit in the background and just watch people silently.
In March 1975, I organized a birthday party for one of our branch members, Sam Green; the party was held at Wynn’s apartment. I was busy washing dishes when Ted walked over and stood beside me.“You look like you could use some help” he offered. I was flattered that he would notice me, and hoped that perhaps he would ask me out on a date. My camera was sitting nearby, and I handed it to Wynn and asked, “Wynn, take my picture with Ted!”Ted pointed a rinsing gun at me as we posed together. It was one of the few pictures taken of Ted outside a courtroom or jail.” - Carol Hall Bartholomew
for your consideration: yoga instructor Doc who, when it’s the season for it, has his yoga classes out on the beach in a nice private area where no one will bother them unless someone is a merman who’s going to sneak a peek
also, can i just say, to the fic writers who can consistently write Donut and all his amazing blatant double entendres, holy shit, glass toast and hat tip to you because making everything he says a double entendre is a fucking ARTFORM that I just do NOT have the easy talent for holy shit like it’s embarrassing how long it took for me to come up with that
why is it that every new facecanon and first time drawing of one of the characters that happens is through this au tho like why me why
its even funnier because like it’s supposed to be a beginning class for yoga but like that pose is actually apparently mid to higher level but look i needed something that would show off kai’s insane flexibility
I thought this was such a good question that it deserved its own post! You don’t simply wake up one day with a 10 step routine. You also shouldn’t buy all 10 steps at once (despite the temptation)! A full 10 step routine can be daunting for someone just dipping their toes into the KBeauty scene. So this poses the question:
Request: @arwa05 : Tom with his children the first day of school..
Word Count: 1,800+
A/N: Imagine the girls with curls cause I couldn’t find any to represent what I wanted lol.
-ALSO THIS IS MY 50TH IMAGINE ON THIS BLOG!-
Getting out of bed you pick out the outfit you had planned to wear today. Tom was still sleeping in his bed. Small snores came from him as his chest rose and fell. He got home from his flight at three in the morning and is exhausted. You felt guilty for having to wake him up in a bit. Entering the bathroom you get dressed and ready as quietly as you can.
Holding your heels you exit the room walking down the hall. Opening the door you see two sleeping Hollands. Turning on the light you see their bodies stir. Ella was the first to sit up and rub her eyes with her hands. Ava groaned loudly before sitting up, she reminds you the most of Tom when you wake him up. The two of them look at you with a pout their arms crossing over their chests simultaneously.
“Alright my loves, c’mon lets get ready for your first day of school” picking up their uniforms on the hangers you hold them up. Ava gets out of bed first trudging over and grabbing hers. Ella shortly following after her sister towards the bathroom.
“I’m going to wake daddy up and you two better be dressed by the time I come back” looking at them with my hand on my hip. Knowing these two they would try and pull something so they don’t have to go.
Walking back to yours and Tom’s room you see his shirtless torso on view. Entering the room you quietly walk over to his side of the bed. Leaning down you press kisses to his face making him move a bit. A groan comes from him making you feel bad since he’s so tired. Pressing a kiss to his lips your head is pulled closer by his hand.
“Good morning beautiful” his voice raspy with a lazy grin on his face as he leans back. A blush tinted your cheeks, no matter what he can always make you blush.
“Morning baby, the girls are getting dressed… I’m going to start breakfast do you want tea or coffee?” you ask brushing the curls out of his face and running your fingers down and along his jaw. A light stubble was on his jawline scratching your fingertips.
“Coffee please love, I fucking need that or else I’ll pass out again” Sitting up he grabs your hand giving it a kiss. Getting off the bed your smile at him before leaving the bedroom.
Grabbing the girls lunches out of the fridge you set them down on the counter. Ella comes running into the kitchen her brown curls bouncing. Ava walks slowly into the kitchen rubbing her eyes before sitting down at the table. Cutting up some fruit you start making breakfast for everyone. Getting the coffee pot started you then start getting the plates out.
Tom enters the kitchen twenty minutes later dressed in a suit. Pulling you to him he presses a kiss to your forehead before taking the coffee mug you had in your hand. Bringing it up to his lips he takes a sip and sighing in content after. Grabbing the toast you set them down on the plates. The eggs were finally done and you got them on the plate without destroying the yolk.
Giving the girls their food first they start digging in. Filling their cups up with half water and half orange juice. Placing their cups back down you go and grab Tom’s plate and set it down . Pecking his cheek he chuckles looking back at you as you grab your plate. Sitting down across from Tom you pick up your fork and poke your raspberry putting it in your mouth.
A quick bit before I get into the post, everything I share below is a method of self care. To many of you it may seem that logically I feel better because of those reasons and not because of magical ones. And to that I say it is surely possible. However I would like to say in defense of the magical elements of this post that when I exclude them from the self care elements the results are not nearly so potent for myself (be that a psychological reason or magical one). Ultimately it is up to you to decide what to pursue.
The ritual can be broken down into three simple parts: Cleanse, Consume, and Cease.
✨A shower is ideal.
✨Turn off the lights and open the window.
✨If it’s night time a few candles (in containers is safer but I’ve used tealights without issue)
✨A body scrub (exfoliating is good DO NOT USE MICROBEADS THEY ARE TERRIBLE FOR THE ENVORINMENT.)
✨Typical shower items
✨Freshly washed towel
✨Moody Music (I listened to Eivør and Faun and Omnia for this myself)
✨While in the shower imagine your body is coated in a thick, black tar. Starting from your head peel (yes physically) the tar from the top of your head down.
✨The more you “struggle” the better I feel the results tend to be. Really tear at the stuff and work your way all the way down to your feet. Once the last bit is torn off and down the drain wash up really well. Pay attention to lather in especially sore or achey areas.
✨I focus in grounding and even on light trance work in the shower. If you are uncomfortable by this you can avoid it. I clear my mind and sit in the floor eventually working into a position where my forehead touches the floor (child’s pose).
✨After this it is important to get up slowly, I’ve gotten really dizzy from standing up too quickly in the shower before.
✨While I towel dry I dance around the bathroom, snuffing candles out until I’m left in silence and darkness.
✨At this point I do daily grooming things but pay attention to how. Lotion and toner is applied with thought and consideration. Slowly building up these methods of care as a means of replacing what was lost and washed away. Though, care, and energy is important when repairing after cleansing. If you like you can encorperate sigil work (amulet work/ talisman work to some) into this aspect of the ritual.
✨Cook yourself some simple and yummy food. Don’t make anything too heavy but indulge in foods rich in color and that make you feel better.
✨Often I cook eggs, jams and breads, and honey covered cakes and things of that nature. Meat is also a good choice.
✨ Season with strong protection or warding foods such as garlic, honey, rosemary, thyme, salt, lemon and so on.
✨Settle down with something stimulating but also that you enjoy like a favorite song or book. Nourishing yourself is more than simply eating food.
✨If you fancy it a nice walk or a quick trip out is also a good method of clearing your mind.
✨Make up your bed and make sure you sleep with iron under or above the bed (I sleep with a throwing axe).
✨Before you go to sleep tie a red yarn around your neck (loose enough to not harm you but tight enough not to snag while you sleep).
✨Wear the yarn for the duration of the next day and at nightfall cut it off and burn it. Dispose of the ashes in running water or at a crossroads.
These steps have never failed me so I offer them to do with as you will. The thing with rituals is you must repeat them so this is something that requires monthly maintenance at the very least in order to remain effective.
did I mention today how happy I am to have you...
and did I tell you...
yes, you told me how beautiful I look today, that I'm your life and love, that my body creates music, that I'm "golden" boyfriend, how my eyes sparkle today and how you'd fly to Japan anytime again to meet me, that I'm the best fiance on Earth and that even Makkachin doesn't love me as much as you do
and what about
yes, I know that you love me more than any katsudon and you're still doing dish washing today, sorry
*dramatic posing* how one has to suffer for love
jedi fundraising post the clone wars, because
they need some extra credits to fix this Mess:
the bake sale
The clones’ cake pops taste the best. The (very
much alive) younglings helped them and accidentally ate half of what they made,
so now the whole event has a bunch of hyper force-sensitive toddlers running
Luminara’s cookies have a Worrying amount of
sugar. It’s how she Copes
Obi Wan’s cupcakes are certified biohazards and
cannot be sold legally, but they sell out within an hour on coruscant’s black
Thirty seven buyers are Very Disappointed when
they find out that the listing for A Chance To Get A Taste of General Kenobi’s
Baked Goods is a lot more literal than anticipated.
Eight fights break out over whether ‘cupcakes’
means his pecs or his butt. Anakin is responsible for instigating all of them.
Plo Koon’s shady brownies are Huge Hits. a fourth of his
sales come from fellow jedi masters.
Obi Wan and Anakin are on the front cover,
training. Because this is a Respectable Fundraising Calendar That Follows The
Rules Of Fundraising Calendars, Obi Wan and Anakin are missing robes and most
of their clothes. They have their lightsabers out and are back-to-back, obi
doing the Soresu Fingers™ and anakin Smouldering Intensely directly at the
Originally, Obi was on the front cover. shirtless
in just his leggings, meditating, after a series of Strenuous Forms that left
him Glistening With Sweat. But people kept swooning before they even got to the
second picture, so they moved this one inside
The jedi calendar almost became an obi wan calendar, but Obi “accidentally” deleted half his pictures out of
There’s one of Obi in The Red Mandalorian Armor™,
because the props guy had some lying around and got Ideas. This picture
accidentally ends up becoming a recruitment poster for Mandalore. Numbers go up
Kit Fisto’s got the underwater shoot covered
Anakin’s solo is him piloting a jedi starfighter.
He is not wearing everything someone piloting a jedi starfighter should be
wearing. But his Smile and Curls and Boob Muscles are out in Full Force, so
even Obi doesn’t say anything
yoda offers to join and they tell him he can be on the space
version of feb 29. it’s a leap year
the speeder wash
They have to take their robes off for this one, too. it’s kit
fisto’s fave fundraiser, he’s In His Element and ecsTATIC the entire day
Anakin too is ecstatic, bc he’s around speeders!!
All day!! He keeps taking people’s fancy speeders for a ‘test run’ after he’s
done washing them. Anakin rakes in the Most in tips
Quinlan Vos poses on every single speeder he
touches. It’s the most extra but also a Lot. The jedi are his family, and if he
can help his family by spreading himself improperly on the hood of a luxury
speeder while cameras flash wildly, then vos is damn well going to do it. No, Master Windu, I will not sit properly, and NO,
Obi Wan, I will not stop ripping off my clothes in slow motion—
At least one v tipsy customer def comes up to obi
wan like ‘i have a speeder you can help me clean’ and shows him a Hastily
Applied and Questionably Located speeder tattoo
Gen, 800ish words, Dick Grayson, Bruce Wayne, a Baby:
Bruce Wayne had been in Dick’s apartment for all of five minutes and already felt terribly out of his depth. He was not a stranger to psychological phenomenon and had conditioned himself to resist a lot of automatic reactions, or suppress them.
But standing in the living room watching Dick hold a baby– an impossibly tiny baby– he was overwhelmed by a flood of reactions he hadn’t braced himself to fight off. Despite not considering himself a sentimental person, he did actually have a moment where he remembered the first night he’d brought Dick home.