thats what you get for lying

A story about a weird human thing

Scene: space, a spacecraft, this mostly Tizrah crew has a few humans

•A bell sounds, signaling the humans aboard that its time for them to eat
• The humans, scattered about the ship, make their way to the mess hall
• another crew member, tizrah-Sine, takes count of the humans eating
• If a human doesn’t come to eat and socialize, ze might be sick
• This crew takes care of their human crew mates
• Sine doesn’t see human-Harlo
• Sine goes off to find Harlo
•Harlo is sitting in the lounge
•cat-Dubby is sitting on Harlo

S: Harlo, Why is it that you didn’t come to eat when the bell rang?
H: I can’t just get up, Dubs is sitting on me
S: Do you not have the strength to remove the cat from your lap?
H: I could, but it’s just not right
S: What do you mean?
H: Its not okay to disturb a cat thats lying on you
S: …
S: …
S: The cats peace is more important than food?
H: Its fine, Food can wait until Dubs gets up

•Dubby wanders off not long after this conversation
•Harlo joins the other humans
•The other humans agree with Harlo’s actions
•Sine reports this to zir supervisor
• A note is made in the ships guide to humans

- A human might not get up when sat upon by a cat. It is not viewed as acceptable to disturb the cat. Humans will still disturb cats in other situations. This situation is somehow special.

  • Lucio: Hey, D.VA!
  • D.VA: Hey, Lucio!
  • Lucio: Would you like to try this Luci-O's Now With 30% More Marshmallows?!
  • D.VA: Only if you want to try these D.VAritos Nuclear Green!
  • McCree: Are they doing a commercial?
  • Symmetra: Yes. They've been at this for hours.
  • Winston: You know what would go with that balanced breakfast? Science Monkey Peanut Butter on toast! Now with less salt.
  • McCree: Since when?
  • Symmetra: Apparently that was his main source of income after the original Overwatch disbanded.
  • Reaper: This is disgusting...ly delicious and nutritious. These Cinnamon Reapers are to DIE DIE DIE for.
  • McCree: ...
  • Symmetra: That's new. Where are you going?
  • McCree: To get my own product to push.
On the phone
  • Erza: (in the bath, drinking wine relaxing as the phone rings) Hello?
  • Meredy: Hey Erza, it's me. What are you doing?
  • Erza: (lying) I'm, uh, packing. Just getting ready for our trip to Alvarez.
  • Meredy: (is also in a bath with wine) Hold on a second. That's my other line. (switches lines) Hello?
  • Jellal: Meredy, it's Jellal. I hope I didn't catch you at a bad time.
  • Meredy: Nope. I'm just at the computer. (is totally not at the computer) Uh, so what are you up to right now?
  • Jellal: (also taking a bath while drinking wine) I'm taking a bubble bath.
  • Meredy: Hold on (thinks she switches line back to Erza) Hey, Erza, Jellal is calling me from a bubble bath.
  • Jellal: ...
  • Jellal: It's still me, Meredy.
Jungkook BadBoy! Au (Jungkook x Reader)
  • Jungkook strolls down the hallway of his school, skipping class as usual.
  • TEACHER: Excuse me but shouldn't you be in class?
  • JUNGKOOK: Hmm.. That's a loaded question. To should or not to should..?
  • TEACHER: You aren't funny Mr. Jeon.
  • JUNGKOOK: Really? Then my friends have been lying to me for years. What should I do about this betrayl?
  • TEACHER: I am not participating in this ridiculous banter.
  • JUNGKOOK: And you shouldn't have to. Let me get out of your hair. If you change your mind and you do want to countinue with our witty convo, you can find me in the hallway next to the girl's locker room or in the girl's locker room.
  • ~Five minutes later; Jungkook is in the principal's office waiting to be seen. Y/N sits down next to him
  • JUNGKOOK: Hello Y/N? Are you guilty of witful banter as well?
  • Y/N: Close. I'm in for coming to class half an hour late.
  • JUNGKOOK: I'm not really sure how that's close but go on.
  • Y/N: I stayed up late writing an essay until like six am and slept through my alarm.
  • JUNGKOOK: Okay, I suck at language arts but it doesn't take me that long to write an essay.
  • Y/N: It would if you were watching Netflix at the same time.
  • JUNGKOOK: Ahh.. And let me guess, a pretty girl like you must have been watching some action packed Tarantino movies.
  • Y/N: I can't tell if you're teasing me or flirting with me.
  • Jungkook leans in.
  • JUNGKOOK: Which one do want me to be doing?
  • The Principal comes out.
  • Principal: Y/N, I'll see you now.
  • Y/N leans into Jungkook's ear as she gets up.
  • Y/N: Just look down in your lap, that should be answer enough.
  • Jungkook shivers as she walks away. He looks down into his lap and sees that she left a piece of paper with her phone number in his lap.
  • <p> <b></b> *Ravenclaw and Slytherin kissing*<p/><b>Ravenclaw:</b> *pulls away and stares up into him air for a moment*<p/><b>Ravenclaw:</b> How does O'Hair Air work?<p/><b>Ravenclaw:</b> Like couldn't you steal air and get it free?<p/><b>Ravenclaw:</b> Why pay?<p/><b>Slytherin:</b> <p/><b>Slytherin:</b> Wtf<p/><b>Slytherin:</b> That's what you're thinking about right now?<p/><b>Slytherin:</b> Really?<p/><b>Ravenclaw:</b> <p/><b>Ravenclaw:</b> Yes.<p/><b>Slytherin:</b> *sigh*<p/><b>Slytherin:</b> Yeah, you could totally steal air...<p/></p>

anonymous asked:

Hey (^ω^) Could I request a headcanon where one of the retrainers have overdropped a talk between the MC and Umeko and thinks that the MC is with the lords child and now congratulate the lord. Could you write how the lord would react and how he react when MC told him that she isn't with child and was talking about Matsuko who is secretly with child? (人ゝω・)Requested for the 6 main lords

Sorry that this took longer than expected ;-; I’ve been busy with school so requests will take a bit longer to get done. But hey~ here it is now~!! Hope you like it sweet nonnie (⸝⸝ᵕᴗᵕ⸝⸝)


Oda Nobunaga

  • When he first heard the word “baby” his eyes widened.
  • He asks the retainer where he heard about MC being pregnant.
  • He nods after hearing his answer and goes to find MC.
  • There was a frown forming above his eyes.
  • It’s not that he wasn’t happy to hear that she was pregnant, rather left with mixed feelings about hearing about the news from someone other than her.
  • He pulls MC aside as soon as he sees her walking down the hall.
  • Looking at her with serious eyes he hints at the thought of her being pregnant.
  • MC is confused as she listens to him. “what is going on in here?”
  • She tilts her head to the side and the frown is back to his face.
  • “When were you planning to tell me? I knew that I would leave you with a child after last night.” He’d say with a smirk.
  • SHE’S EVEN MORE CONFUSED NOW.
  • “A c-child?!”
  • It was her turn to get surprised.
  • “But milord I’m n-not pregnant…” She mumbles out in a small whisper.
  • Nobu is confused, was the retainer lying to him?
  • “W-where did you hear that?” She asks again and he tells her.
  • She nods as she finally understands what went wrong.
  • “Um… Milord, I think the retainer got confused… It’s not me thats pregnant but someone I know”
  • Nobu looked dumbfounded for a split second before nodding in understanding.
  • “And milord, you’ll be the first person to tell if I’m pregnant.” She mumbled with a blush.

Akechi Mitsuhide

  • He was busy all day and was shocked when he heard the retainer but smiled regardless.
  • His thoughts were drifting out of his grasp as he strode towards their room for a tea break is this what its called? with a light smile on his face.
  • As soon as he stepped into the room he was met with a sweet smile from her.
  • He walked in with excited footsteps, embracing her in his arms.
  • “Hmm? Did something good happen?” MC looked up to him.
  • He remained quiet for a few seconds, breathing in her scent before mumbling to her.
  • “MC… is it true that our flower started blooming?”
  • “Flower?” MC turned to look up to him.
  • “Our little flower here…” He whispered softly as his hand moved over her stomach.
  • “Little flower…?” MC mumbled under her breathe as she tried to understand what he’s hinting at.
  • “The little flower of life growing here.”
  • Her eyes widened, “Umm… M-Mitsuhide… I-…I’m not…”
  • Mitsuhide’s head was up in the clouds as she tried to explain to him that she wasn’t pregnant.
  • After a few minutes, she was finally able to get the words out of her lips.
  • “Mitsuhide! I-I am not pregnant.”
  • “Huh? w-what do you mean?”
  • “I t-think someone has been mistaken with me and someone else.”
  • She spent a couple more minutes trying to understand how he got confused with her and another person, till Mitsuhide mentioned the retainer.
  • “Ah… so he might’ve overheard our talk this evening…” MC thought as she finally processed how it happened.
  • “Milord I think the retainer got mistaken with me a-and someone else.”
  • That night Mitsuhide refused to let her go. After all, the beast inside him couldn’t be trapped after wanting to build a family with her.

Sanada Yukimura

  • As soon as he heard the words coming out of the retainers mouth his mouth started to act involuntarily, opening and closing like a fish.
  • His cheeks started to turn to apples, his words failing to come out.
  • The retainer was concerned as he watched Yukimura, he was about to calm him down when Saizo came.
  • “I’ll take it from here.” Saizo mumbles with a smile to the retainer. It’s that smile he gives off when he has to take care of yukimura
  • “Yukimura dear…” he sighs.
  • “S-Sazio, d-did you hear what he said?!”
  • “He said that I’m pregNANT!!!”
  • Saizo had to shake his head at his words.
  • “Little lord, it’s MC that’s pregnant. Not you.”
  • Yukimura was too caught up in his little world to listen to Saizo.
  • After a few minutes he remembers something.
  • “I should go to MC, she must not work while she’s carrying our baby!”
  • He didn’t look back as he rushed around the castle to search for her.
  • MC was walking down the hall when he accidentally bumped into her.
  • “S-sorr-..! MC, you’re here.” He held her close and sighed softly.
  • He was glad that she wasn’t carrying anything or doing anything hard.
  • He stroked her hair before moving back and rubbing her tummy softly.
  • “MC… why didn’t you tell me.” He looked up to her with gentle eyes.
  • “Umm… tell you what..?“
  • “About our baby… you’re pregnant.”
  • Yukimura smiled and she pulled away softly.
  • “N-no, I’m not…” she mumbled softly as her eyes moved downwards.
  • “MC… you don’t want me to know?” His expression was of a sad puppy.
  • MC shook her head and looked away.
  • “I’m not pregnant…”
  • Yukimura looked up to her with big sad eyes.
  • “Y-you’re not?!!” He blushed furiously as he thought that he misunderstood what the retainer said.
  • “I heard from Saizo… but it wasn’t me that was pregnant.” She slowly took his hand in hers.
  • “But I’ll be glad to have you as the father of my children.”

Kirigakure Saizo

  • He was just back from his mission when Yukimura ran up to him excitedly.
  • “Saizo! Saizo!! You need to hear this!!” Yukimura was rushing to tell him.
  • “I’m here little lord, you don’t have to yell so loud…” Saizo sighed as he strode towards him.
  • “Haven’t you heard?! MC is pregnant!” Yukimura spoke excitedly.
  • “Pregnant?! The l-little lady?”
  • Saizo had a shocked expression on his face. It wasn’t everyday that you see a shocked Saizo.
  • He wouldn’t have believed something so straight away if it came out of someone else’s mouth, but it was Yukimura that’s telling him.
  • Yukimura couldn’t wait any longer and dragged Saizo all the way to MC.
  • Saizo didn’t mind it because yukimura always does that, of the mix of emotions running through him.
  • He dragged him all the way to MC.
  • “MC, tell him! tell him!” He sounded very VERY excited. Boi you aren’t the father of those bbs, calm down
  • “Umm… t-tell him what?” MC looked troubled as she turned to Yukimura.
  • “ABOUT THE BABY!” He left the words to fall off his lips without much thought.
  • “B-baby?!!” MC was shocked, she wasn’t pregnant and she doesn’t know how Saizo would react to this.
  • She loved him and wanted to have a family with him but she didn’t know what he thought about children.
  • “S-Sazio, I-I’m not p-..”
  • “Little lady, I know.” Saizo turned to Yukimura and he knew it was time for him to leave.
  • He looked so sad to hear that MC wasn’t pregnant and wanted to ask what she meant but… Saizo gave him the look.
  • After he was gone, Saizo pulled MC into a hug and stroked her hair.
  • “Little lady…” He slowly cupped her cheek with one hand as he sighed.
  • “A family… it would be nice to have one with you…”
  • OK SO SAIZO IS A SWEETHEART AND I IMAGINE THAT HE WAS REALLY HAPPY WHEN HE HEARD ABOUT MC BEING PREGNANT BUT WHEN SHE TOLD HIM THAT SHE ISNT, HE GOT A BIT OF A LONELY FEELING IN HIS CHEST THAT HE DIDNT UNDERSTAND. AND HERE IS WHERE I STOP MYSELF TO MOVE TO MASA.

Date Masamune

  • When he hears the news from the retainer he would be happy.
  • A smile would start to climb up his cheeks as a twinkle brightens his eyes.
  • He’d immediately leave in search of you.
  • He makes sure to inform Kojuro that he’s leaving to go for MC beforehand.
  • He strides immediately to the kitchen, where he finds her working there.
  • Masamune started getting worried that something might happen to her now that she’s pregnant and calls for her.
  • MC leaves the work at hand and goes over to him.
  • He takes her hand in his and plays gently with her fingers, stroking her palm and going up to her fingertips before smiling up to her.
  • “Masamune…” She smiled.
  • “MC… when were you going to tell me..?” He whispered back to her with a gentle smile.
  • MC had different thoughts and started blushing.
  • “U-umm… I-… I was going to tell you soon.” She mumbled shyly.
  • He didn’t waste any second as he wrapped his arms around her tightly.
  • “MC…” His lips trembled as he whispered her name.
  • “I can’t wait to meet our child.” He smiled again.
  • “Child?!” MC looked up to meet his eyes.
  • “Mnn..” He nods as he looks into her eyes.
  • MC looks away and bites on her lip.
  • How was she going to tell him that she isn’t pregnant when he has this unfair look on his face.
  • “Masamune…” MC held his hand as she mumbled out in a soft whisper.
  • “I’m-… n-not pregnant.”
  • Her eyes traveled down to the floor as she saw the change in his eyes.
  • “MC…” Masamune’s hand traveled to press to her cheek.
  • “You’re not pregnant?” He asked to make sure.
  • MC shook her head slowly.
  • He pressed their foreheads to one another and whispered to her softly.
  • “You don’t have to look so down…” He slowly caressed her cheek.
  • “We’ll have our own family one day. Me and you, with our little family.”

Katakura Kojuro

  • Kojuro was working all day long and it was late at night when he passed by the retainer.
  • The retainer didn’t notice him at first but when he did, he didn’t forget to congratulate him.
  • “Congratulations Lord Kojuro, I’ve heard you’ll be having a child.”
  • Those words kept on repeating themselves in his head.
  • Over and over again till he got to his room, where he heard his precious girl humming softly.
  • He immediately relaxed when he heard her voice.
  • He entered the room slowly, attempting not to make any sound.
  • He failed. His foot got caught on something on the ground and he almost fell to the ground.
  • MC turned to him and chuckled as she helped him up.
  • “My precious girl.” He pulled her in his embrace as he stroked her hair.
  • He continued stroking her hair till he felt her relax against him.
  • “My dear, make sure you rest today. And tomorrow, and the day after.” He whispered to her with a sigh.
  • “Kojuro?” She looked up to meet his eyes.
  • She was sure that she hadn’t overworked herself or made any mistake as she worked around the castle.
  • Did she do something wrong?
  • He chuckled dryly as he met her eyes.
  • “MC, I just don’t want you or our baby to get hurt.” His hand traveled to her hair as he ruffled it.
  • “Oh..” She nodded as she was about to rest her head against his chest again.
  • Wait. Baby?!!
  • She pulled away and looked up to him in shock.
  • “M-milord, w-what baby?”
  • He chuckled again.
  • “Don’t tell me you forgot.” His hand pressed to her back as he whispered softly.
  • “Our baby, my precious girl.”
  • “B-but I’m not pregnant…” Her fingers trembled as she looked up to him.
  • “Y-you’re not?” His eyes widened.
  • “I-I’m not, w-where did you hear such things?”
  • “I was walking back here, when a retainer congratulated me for your pregnancy…” His eyes traveled down to her hand.
  • “But it seems like he was mistaken…” He looked up again and met her eyes with a soft smile.
  • “But that doesn’t mean we can’t make his words turn to a reality.” A soft chuckle left his lips as his precious girl’s cheek turned into a deep shade of red.
What went down in The Bubbler
  • INTRO SEQUENCE
  • Marinette: *wakes up*
  • Tikki: ok I am so tired today, so please just this once don't go crazy about anyth—
  • Marinette: IT'S THAT HOT GUY'S BIRTHDAY
  • Tikki: and here we go
  • Adrien: can I celebrate my birthday today
  • Gabriel: f**k you Adrien
  • Nino: ok he defs did not say that to you
  • Adrien: yeah but that's what he meant
  • Marinette: imma give this present to that hot guy
  • Alya: please do not have a major freakout fest
  • Adrien: hi Marinette!
  • Marinette: I AM HAVING A MAJOR FREAKOUT FEST
  • Chloé: *pushes Marinette in front of a bus*
  • Adrien: did you just push Marinette in front of a bus?
  • Chloé: she'll be fine, now let's get back to what's important which is your birthday present that I defs have for you
  • Nino: while this is happening imma go talk to Adrien's dad
  • Gabriel: f**k you Nino
  • Nino: oh wow he wasn't lying
  • Gabriel: now get out of my house and stop blowing all those f**king bubbles
  • Hawkmoth: hey Nino you wanna blow some f**king bubbles
  • Nino: oh hell yes
  • Bubbler: *blows some f**king bubbles*
  • Marinette: *transforms*
  • Bubbler: hey every single one of Adrien's friends, let's go have a party
  • Everyone: kk
  • Bubbler: this is all of you, right? I'm not forgetting anyone? for instance, somebody I explicitly told Adrien he should get to know?
  • Everyone: no you're not forgetting anyone
  • Bubbler: kk cool
  • Adrien: why are you all at my house
  • Bubbler: it's time to PARTAY
  • Adrien: did you just kidnap my dad
  • Bubbler: um, no?
  • Bubbler, to himself: great deflection there dude, that was totally convincing
  • Chloé: hey Adrien let's dance together
  • Adrien: I don't think this is how consent works
  • Ladybug: lucky charm!
  • *record happens*
  • Ladybug: *throws record*
  • Record: WE'RE NO STRANGERS TO LOOOOOOOVE
  • Bubbler: aaaaaaaand that's enough dancing for today
  • Adrien: *slips away and transforms*
  • Ladybug: imma busting up your party
  • Chat Noir: me too, because I definitely haven't been here yet
  • Bubbler: imma blow lots of bubbles at you
  • Ladybug: is this really happening? is this really your power? is this really the best Hawkmoth could come up with?
  • Bubbler: *blows a lot of bubbles at them*
  • Ladybug and Chat Noir: *go high into the sky in a big bubble*
  • Chat Noir: cataclysm!
  • Ladybug: good thinking bc we're falling now
  • Chat Noir: you can save us, right?
  • Ladybug: *saves herself*
  • Chat Noir: *falls to his death*
  • Bubbler: ok imma send everybody into space
  • Bubbler: *bubbles everybody and sends them into space*
  • Bubbler: bye bye little bubbleflies
  • Ladybug: NO YOU DO NOT GET TO SAY THAT
  • Bubbler: what?
  • Ladybug: THAT'S MY LINE
  • Bubbler: is this really what you're concerned about here
  • Ladybug: look it's about brand integrity, ok?
  • Bubbler: well anyway, you still haven't seen the last of me, now run before my EXPLODING FIRE BUBBLE ATTACK!!!
  • Ladybug: is this real? is this a thing that is actually happening?
  • Bubbler: I guess so?
  • Ladybug: lucky charm!
  • *wrench happens*
  • Ladybug: *uses wrench to destroy the Eiffel tower*
  • Bubbler: you realize you're destroying the Eiffel tower
  • Ladybug: *beats bubbler* bye bye, little bubblefly
  • Nathalie: here Adrien have a gift that's definitely from your father, not from Marinette
  • Marinette: I made that
  • Adrien: idk
  • ROLL CREDITS

anonymous asked:

•I've got a question that's been bugging me for a while. In iwtv, Louis states he was turned in 1791. However from what I understand, Lestat was born in 1780. This would have made Lestat 11 when he turned Louis, which is obviously not the case. So, my question is was Louis lying about when he was turned to make him seem older and more powerful than he actually is or is just a continuity error? Thanks :) •

I get why you might be frustrated, I’m not sure how much VC you’ve read, I hope this answer doesn’t spoil you if you don’t want to be spoiled but here we go… 

Lestat was born in 1760. Not sure where you got 1780… I believe you are forgetting the almost 10 yrs Lestat and Gabrielle ~wandered the Devil’s Road~ together, which was from 1780-89. There’s a timeline in the official Vampire Companion (there is some debate about discrepancies of this book to canon, but this book was intended to be the author’s deciding word on canon facts):

Here’s a snippet of the time line, sorry for the warping, but it’s a thick paperback book and I didn’t wanna injure the binding!

Worth noting also: AR underscores that Lestat was 20 when he was turned.* 

So by 1791, Lestat is actually like 31 mortal years old, and Louis is in fact younger than he is, at 25 (why they made him 24 in the movie is beyond me bc it’s only a year different? IDK).

Keep reading

i am traumatized jfc

so i was getting down one of the school trumpet cases from on top of the lockers right and i opened it up and it wasn’t a trumpet it was half a trumpet and several trumpet bits just lying around do you have any idea what kind of mental shock that is to be expecting one thing and instead get variations of its mangled corpse thats like opening a classroom and your teachers remains are spread across the floor or buying a box of cookies but it’s not a box of cookies its a box of cookie ingredients and a bomb to cook it with i am not ok

When You're Sick

PROMPT: “I’ll take the couch.”

You frowned, hiding your amusement as you watch your boyfriend try to juggle cleaning up and cooking at the same time. How it came to this was a mystery but everything started on a Thursday of that week.

It was very cloudy, a perfect time for a date. You smiled too many times that day as you enjoy the time you were given the chance to spend with Seongwoo. Wearing a bunny ears headband, he strides towards you as he placed cat ears on your head, careful not to mess your hair up.

“Amusement park is incomplete without animal ears.” Seongwoo commented. He then folded his ears before looking at you with a serious expression. “Fast talk you you like bunny ears or my ears better?”

“Your ears of couse.” you laugh. “Now let me see them!”

Seongwoo chuckled and popped his left ear, followed by the other, causing you to laugh. He laughed with you, placing an arm on your shoulder as the two of you continued on your amusement park date.

The horror house was a must for you so you enter, half-dragging Seongwoo inside.

“Don’t shout too much, just stand behind me.” Seongwoo stated but people from a 50-mile radius could tell he was bluffing. As you entered, he walked confidently, trying not to shout at the jumpscares. However, as you reached the end, he was caught off guard and screamed his head off, pushing you to the exit.

Next was the roller coaster, followed by the vikings and the ferris wheel. Inside the ferries wheel, you lean on Seongwoo’s shoulder as he planted a kiss on your forehead, the two of you enjoying the comfortable silence.

Which was broken by a violent sneeze.

All these attractions being high up in the sky, you found yourself with a rather bad cold that caused you to cough and sneeze like there’s no tomorrow. Your eyes started getting teary, your nose running.

“Way to break the mood.” Seongwoo muttered but neverthless offering his handkerchief. You roll your eyes and take it, using it to cover the sneezes that followed.

“Sorry,” you mutter the moment you were walking back to the car. Your voice was also hoarse from all the shouting so you turn to Seongwoo only to find him at a cotton candy stand.

You walk up to him, tapping his shoulder to get attention but before you could say anything, he hands you a bottle of water, ruffling your hair afterwards. “Lets go home so you could rest.”


The two of you reach your house and Seongwoo wasted no time, tucking you in before rushing off to cook while you sleep.

Exhausted, you wake up from your nap, feeling the cold intensifying. You started feeling light headed as you walked to the living room and finds your boyfriend in a full-on Cinderella mode. He was wearing your pink apron matched with a bandana wrapped around his head.

You watch him vaccum for a few minutes, shocked when he ran to the kitchen to turn of the stew. When he came back, he sees you leaning on the door way, weakly smirking.

“Well this is a rare sight.” you smile, walking towards him, sitting on the sofa.

Seongwoo smiled back and sat next to you. “You mean, your superstar boyfriend wearing an apron?”

“I meant, my dork boyfriend finally cleaning.” you laugh, standing up the moment he sat down. “You cleaned so well though, Minhyun would be proud.”

“Enough chit chat missy, get that cute ass on the dining room and we’ll eat.” Seongwoo exclaimed, running to the kitchen to serve the food.

The rest of the day was spent with Seongwoo doting over you and you subtly avoiding physical contact with him. It was inevitable at night though, when you were lying on the bed and saw.Seongwoo in his sleep wear.

“Wait,” you squeal, getting out of bed when he laid down. “I don’t want to sleep with you.”

Seongwoo raised a brow. “Ah, hearing that after a year of sleeping together sure hurts.”

“Thats not what I meant.” you sigh, grabbing a pillow. “You sleep here, I’ll sleep outside.”

“Why?” he asked, still confused.

You turn back to him. “Because you’ll get sick too if you sleep beside me. I’ll be outside, goodnight.”

Seongwoo chuckled and stood on his feet, running after you before sweeping you off of your feet. He kisses your cheek before returning you gently on the bed. “You stay here, I’ll take the couch.”

“But you’re tired too and—” you started but Seongwoo swiftly pecks your lips, causing you to stop talking. “He-hey…”

He chuckles, grabbing a pillow before heading outside. “‘Love you too!”

wonder woman thoughts *spoilers*

-Little diana is so fucking cute omg!!
-this scenery and everything is so beautiful wow
-Meeting Chris Pine aka steve holy fuck he is so hot i missed him on the big screen
-diana is so badass yes queen
-RIP ANTIOPE
-this fight is so stressful omfg
-Fuck the patriarchy lmao men ruin everything!!!!
-that lasso yes around steve trevor mmm even more yes he’s so cute and funny my sweet american man ugh
-Dr poison can fuck right off
-Look at daddy destroying that german base fuck he’s so hot
-Men are easily corrupted!!!! Bish ur not wrong
-CHRIS PINE IN THE WATER OMG HE’s FUCKING NAKED WOW ONLY HIS HAND COVERING HIS PENIS MOVE IT PLS I NEED IT
-THIS SCENE BETWEEN THEM IS SO CUTE THEYRE LEARNING SO MUCH FROM EACHOTHER
-YES BITCH scale that fucking wall and get that sword
-“Who will i b if i stay” QUEEEEN COMING TO SAVE US ALL
-“There are men who can stop him” “Im the man who can” YES SLAY U DONT NEED A MAN
-LOL this interaction on the boat…U dont sleep w women?
-Omg they’re Sleepin together this is cute af
-I was sculpted from Clay… thats neat LMFAO
-I Understand the Pleasures of flesh lmao omg
For Pleasure men are unnecessary… hahaha i love this
-Gal is so fucking mesmerizing wow so gorg
-She’s so cute in the real world
-Etta holding the shield and sword lmfao i love the comedic elements
-She doesnt take any shit from anybody i love her telling those old men off
-YOU WERE LYING??? LmFao they’re so cute i can’t
-“I am bothfrightened n aroused” me fucking too
-May we get what we want may we get what we need but may we never get what we deserve… same
-no mansland… but we got a woman to KILL IT
-WHAT A BADASS BITCH YES LET UR HAIR DOWN GIRL
-IM CRYING YES QUEEN
-I HAVE NO WORDS except yes bitch!!!! That whole fight sequence was amazing omfg what a badass queen i was cheering the whole time i lit up and chris pine helping her yes boo youre doing amazing sweetie
-You know, you did this…. we* did this omg they’re a we and now they’re dancing fuck!!!
-Shes so beautiful when she smiles/in general they’re so relieved and happy rn
-Ugh chris pine is so fuckin sexy, still thinking abt his naked body
-Omg r they gna fuck this is like her first kiss wat
-Chris’ German accent lmfao
-The village being gassed omg im crying
-MY Queen is pissED YES
-QUEEN OF THE AMAZONS YAS BOTCH KILL HIM
-…BUT MAYBE PPL ARENT ALWAYS GOOD UGH SHES SO HEARTBROKEN
-ITS not about what you deserve its what about what you believe
-She is shook Af… me too diana
-I knew he was fucking bad omg that old bitch I’m shook this dude is Ares!!! Hes real!!! Damn
-Shes the godliller not some sword!!!queen!!!
-Omfg is steve gonna die??? NOO WHY MY BABY PLS daddy NO
-He gave her his watch IM CRYING FUCK actual tears
-CMON BITCH U GOT THIS!!! I cant believe this old fuck is ares wtf
-STEVE IM CRYING HE’S SUCH A HERO, FUCK, DIANA UNLEASH UR POWER BITCH IM PIST TOO HONEY DESTROY HIM!!!! I wish That dr poison hoe died too wtf
-“IT HAS TO BE ME” OMG STEVE HONEY
NOO!!… I CAN SAVE TODAY But YOU CAN SAVE THE WORLD HOLY FUCK I LOVE HIM SO MUCH
-I WISH WE HAD MORE TIME IM. FUCKING SOBBING WHAT THE FUCJ BITCH I’M so HURT -HE TOLD HER HE LOVED HER!!!
-SHE IS MY QUEEN yes FIGHT!!!!
-HUMANS ARE SO MUCH MORE… ugh i love her
-ITS NOT ABOUT DESERVE ITS wHAT U BELIEVE IM CRYING she quoted bae
-… I BELIEVE IN LOVE, FUCK ME TOO DIANA
-I cant believe hes fucking dead im not okay this memorial is killing me i’m crying my sweet beautiful good steve trevor that pic is so adorable wtf i love him
-Love trumps hate!!!… yes OKAY THIS MOVIE WAS PHENOMENAL this is definitely what the dc universe needed to bring in back to life holy shit she is a goddess and chris pine is daddy this movie and the action and the premise and the destruction of all patriarchal values
-WOW IM SO AMPED UP RN ON GIRL POWER I WANNA FIGHT SOMEONE
-10/10 recommend… if u read this all lets be friends bc thank u for using ur time to read my thoughts xo until next movie I presume

anonymous asked:

Headcannon: after years of making girls scream and fangirl, Jungkook is still quite experienced when it comes to romance, he knows parts but he doesn't know the full experience when it comes to stuff such as kissing. He wants some advice and would only turn to his favourite hyung- Jimin. He asks Jimin to practice kissing with him and as he does so, Jungkook decides that he never wants to stop kissing Jimin. Aka he never imagined how much he'd like kissing Jimin and he falls for him basically.

chgbkj okiiiee i love this kind of hc. idk why i love practicing kissing so much but i do…..WARNING: this one will be mature-ish. no real smut but like….some sexy stuff. okay this is definitely my sexiest one. i got embarrassed writing it LMAO. it’s kind of a FWB thing….pls enjoy.

+ “what do you need jungkook?” jimin asked. jungkook had asked him to talk in private in his bedroom. jimin made himself comfortable on jungkook’s bed but jungkook was anything but comfortable. 

Keep reading

A Living Dream (Spencer Reid x Reader)

A/N: hey guys! Sorry this took so long, I’ve been trying to get caught up with my imagines so bear with me.
Warnings: none
Pairing: Spencer Reid x Reader
Prompt: part two of Out Of My League
Request: ✅
Upcoming Imagine: the reader is Spencer’s girl friend and the team doesn’t know…
-
Ever since you and Spencer talked in the SUV, you both have grown closer and made quite the dynamic duo.
You were always the one luring the UnSub from a bar if necessary or even going on the field with the rest of the team while Spencer filled you in on behavioral traits the UnSub looks for that you might have not picked up.
Spencer has also been a lot more talkative towards you, correcting little mistakes in your assumptions, which were right lots of the time, or even bringing up conversations.
And if you told yourself you weren’t into him, you’d be lying.
You have been carefully observing him more and more each day.
You watch how his tongue darts out across his perfect lips, his hands as they run through his soft hair.
All of these thoughts made this next task more… interesting.
You were assigned to go to a club with the rest of the team and lure out the UnSub by getting his attention, and the only way you thought it would be easier was incorporating Spencer of course.
“What?! No way that's… not my crowd. I wouldn’t fit in.” He said after you suggested it.
“It gives us a better chance of catching him if he sees me with another guy. I’ll taunt him and it will lure him in quicker.” You said.
Spencer sat in his chair and crossed his arms.
“She’s right kid.” Derek said. “Luring him in quicker is better.”
“Yeah and I’m sure you already did the math of how the chances are higher of luring him with more agents in tact.” Rossi said mocking Spencer at the end.
Spencer sat in deep thought until finally giving in.
“Okay fine.”
-
You stepped into the club and the pounding music filled your ears, giving you a rush of dancing and partying.
You turned around to see Spencer slowly making his way in the doors.
He looked extra good today in the new attire you helped pick out for him.
He was wearing a black dress shirt with a red bow tie and suspenders with black slacks and a fedora.
You both even matched.
While he was looking good tonight, so were you.
You wore a tight red dress that hugged your curves along with some black heels.
You reached behind you and offered Spencer your hand.
He looked at it and took it, lacing his long fingers with yours.
You slightly jumped at his contact; you held your hand out as a joke, you know he hates even shaking hands, but he took yours.
“You ready?” You asked him.
He nodded and looked down at you with a smile.
You both walked to the bar, maybe getting a little alcohol in Spencer’s system would loosen him up a bit.
“Im getting a gin and tonic what about you?” You asked breaking the silence.
“Oh um I don’t want anything.” He said looking at his hands in his lap.
You immediately started feeling bad for dragging him in here when he clearly doesn’t want to be here.
“I’m sorry for taking you here. I know you don’t like it, you can go out in the SUV with Derek if you want. I can do this myself I just thought it would be fun if you joined me but I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.” You told him while the bartender gave you your drink.
“No no… I’ll stay.” He said, but you could still see the discomfort in his body language.
“Well let me try to make this fun for you. I know you don’t dance but I want to at least stand and move with you. Come on.” You said pulling him to the dance floor.
You found a relatively spacious spot and you laughed at how awkward Spencer was.
“Just… kind of jump a little bit. Not like your playing hop scotch but just a little.” You said jumping to the beat of the music.
Spencer kind of followed your movements, finally getting the hang of it right when the song ended.
“You did great! It could have gone a lot worse.” You yelled in his ear over the the next song.
“I don’t know if that was assuring or not.” He yelled back with a smile.
The next song was slower, not a slow song but a so called sexy song.
The song was 3:16 am by Jhene Aiko, and you immediately felt the vibe with it.
Spencer watched your body move swiftly and inhaled sharply when you wrapped your arms around his neck.
“Blend in.” You said into his ear as he looked around at the grinding bodies across the club.
You grabbed Spencer’s hand and pulled him closer to you.
His hot breathe collided with your face as you guided his hands to your hips.
You started swaying your body close to his and he did the same.
Your hands trailed from the back of his neck to down his chest, curling your fingers under the suspenders.
“Y/N…” he whispered more to himself because he knew you couldn’t hear him.
“I think I got him.” You whispered in Spencer’s ear, pretending that your being seductive as you looked the UnSub in the eyes.
Spencer tried to keep distance from you so you couldn’t feel his present erection confined in his slacks, but boy oh boy you knew.
You stared at the UnSub seductively, instantly grabbing his attention as you closed the space between you and Spencer.
“It’s okay to let your hands roam. I really need to reel him in so go for it.” You said into his ear before nipping at his earlobe.
Spencer knew the UnSub couldn’t see that… so why did you do it?
Spencer did what you said and let his hands wander.
One of his hands held the small of your back, pulling you closer while the other combed through your hair.
You turned around and pressed your back against his chest as you rolled your hips backwards, feeling his bulge against your back.
He moved your hair to one side and kissed just below your ear.
“Your so beautiful.” He said into your ear, ascending goosebumps across your skin.
You watched as the man across the club stared as you grinder your body against Spencer.
You knew the team had eyes on you, but they would just think it was all a part of the plan, but really, you’ve been dying to be this close to Spencer.
Too bad it was in these circumstances.
You started to grow away from Spencer, whispering you’ll be back before heading to the bar where the UnSub was sitting at.
You strutted over, Spencer’s gaze practically burning into your skin as he watched you breathless.
You ordered another drink that you weren’t going to drink and you felt a hand rest right at the curve of your spine.
“Hey darling.” You heard, immediately recognizing the face that you have seen on multiple screens.
“Hey.” You said flirtatiously.
“So those little dances… are they for free or do you charge?” He asked, highly offending you, but you didn’t let him know.
Instead, you laughed.
“Oh I came with him.” You said with a fake smile.
“Him? The guy you were grinding your fine ass upon on the floor?” He said pointing in Spencer direction.
Spencer’s felt heat rise to his cheeks as he watched the UnSub treat you like a slob.
He had to fight the urge to storm over and probably get his lanky self beaten the crap out of.
“Yeah, are you judging?” You asked getting pissed off.
“Well I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t.” He said leaning closer.
“Why? What’s wrong with him? Just ‘cause he’s lanky and a little nerdy doesn’t mean he’s not worth my time.” You said crossing your arms.
“Don’t get offended doll I was just… surprised that a girl like you…” his hand trailed lower, ghosting over your bottom. “… came with a guy like him.”
You grabbing his arm, twisted it behind his back and slammed his face into the bar before Derek came around with handcuffs.
“Greg Sullivan you are under arrest.” He said as you blew a piece of hair out of your eyes.
You looked around the club for Spencer, but he wasn’t in sight or where you left him.
You made your way through the crowd, to the place where you both first sat and there he was, sitting on one of the stools swirling his drink in his hand.
You watched as he sipped it.
It was alcohol for sure, you could tell by how he drank it.
You sat in the stool next to his, but his eyes were glued to the glass.
“You okay?” You asked.
“Yeah.” He said sluggishly.
Did you do something?
Say something?
“Spencer you don’t look okay and your drinking. You never drink.” You said leaning closer to him.
He wiped his face with his large hand.
“You did great tonight.” He said avoiding the accusation you made.
“Thanks Spence, but will you please tell me what’s wrong.” You said grabbing his hand.
He remembered when you first held his hand in the SUV and how he wondered if it was a romantic gesture or not.
Now he has the answers to his questions.
“Your so out of my league. Soo out of my league. I… I can’t help but have these feeling growing for you but then again who wouldn’t? Your drop dead gorgeous, sweet, caring and everything any man would want in a woman. But there are some combinations that don’t go well together. Like you and me? I could only dream…”
You interrupted him by pressing your lips to his, a hint of alcohol on his lips, but you could still taste the warmth and even coffee on his mouth, due to how much he drinks it throughout the day.
You pulled away, wanting the kiss to linger longer but you needed air.
He opened his eyes slowly, as if he imagined your sweet lips were still on his for a couple more seconds.
“Why did you do that?” He asked softly.
“Because I like you Spencer. I… I like you a lot.” You said with a smile.
“R… really?” He asked quietly.
You nodded and laced your fingers with his, drawing his attention to your intertwined hands.
“Why else would have I wanted to take you here with me? Or why else would have I stuck up for you? I think your amazing… and really cute.” You said taking the drink from his hand and lacing your other hand with his now free one.
He looked down as he blushed.
“Like I said, I could have only dreamt about this.” He said looking into your eyes.
You leant in and kissed his lips once more.
“Well it looks like your in a living dream, Spencer.” You said making him smile as you pressed your foreheads together.

  • historia: *lazily texting on her phone* hey ymir, reiner invited us to his 21st birthday party; what should we get him?
  • ymir: *lying upside down on the couch two feet away* 21's the drinking age, right? let's get him grape juice
  • historia: you. you mean like fine wine?
  • ymir: no like actual unfermented grape juice.
  • historia: *tears rolling down her cheeks* ymir oh my god... that's brilliant
Angsty Yurio: working out his emotions in a healthy way...
  • Yuri: Victor, recently I've been thinking that Yurio's actually really upset that Otabek lost to JJ.
  • Victor: Oh? What makes you think that?
  • Yuri: It's just, I don't know how to explain it. (pauses) Just follow me.
  • The pair arrive at Yurio's dorm room. Music thrums mutely from behind the door. Yuri knocks then pushes open the door.
  • Yuri: (singing loudly, slightly off key) --TRIED SO HARD AND GOT SO FAR. IN THE END, IT DOESN'T EVEN MATTER~ (Lying in bed staring at Otabek Altin poster on opposite wall)
  • Victor: ...
  • Yuri: ...
  • Victor: (thoughtful)When did he get that poster?
  • Yuri: (shocked)That's what you're worried about!?
  • Victor: No, no! I'm just kidding. *Laughs* It's okay, he is just working out his emotions in a healthy way.
  • (Music cuts abruptly)
  • Yurio: HEY! Shitheads, what the fuck are you two doing in my room?! (Storms over, red-faced)GET OUT! OUT! OUT! OUT! *Pushes Yuri and Victor out by force* (slams door in their faces)AND STAY OUT!!!
  • (Sounds of Yurio kicking things)
  • (Yuri and Victor exchange bemused looks)
  • Yuri: (frowns) Is this healthy? When I was younger, I don't recall ever being that worked up about anything...
  • Victor: (laughs) Nyet, it is! I remember I was the same when I was his age. It's totally healthy!
  • Yuri: ...Oh, I had no idea. Okay
  • (Inner Yuri: This is probably a cultural difference. Russian youth are scary.)
What if...

…Mark has been lying this entire time. Remember how he said he doesn’t eat Cheeze-itz anymore because he was sent too many and ate too much of them?

Remember in Friends how Monica had that closet which was never opened and hid a dirty big secret?

Mark has a secret door. A secret door which would be perfect to hide..oh I dunno…a few hundred boxes of Cheeze-Itz!

Originally posted by anat0nic

YES! THATS RIGHT! I’M ON TO YOU MR. IPLIER YOU LITTLE 4ft 2″ CHEEZE-ITZ HOARDER!

Originally posted by filipinowolf

GET BACK HERE !! THERES NO HIDING !! EVEN BOB WONT HELP YOU. LOOK. HE COULDNT GIVE ANY LESS FUCKS!

EXO as thing my friends have said
  • Baekhyun: My memoir will be called "A Heart Full of Love and a Butt Full of Farts" because there's always one loaded in the chamber
  • Chanyeol: Look at how cute that bird is!! He's shaped like a friend!! Don't peck my eyes out, friend!!
  • Suho: I KNOW I WAS LEFT IN CHARGE BUT YOU GUYS SCARE ME YOU'RE GONNA GET ME KILLED
  • Xiumin: Don't get your triggered panties in a twist. God!
  • Chen: *is lying on a table, spreading their legs* How can i sell my wares if no one can see my wares??
  • Lay: "Lu" isn't a dirty song!! I'm proud of him.
  • Kyungsoo: Nothing is good when it's plural. The moral: just be alone.
  • Sehun: I just farted. I wanted to let you know since you're in the crossfire
  • Kai: You tried to draw WHAT on me when I slept?
  • Kris: Fuck this shit I'm out. Wait, that's not appropriate for the kids. Darn this piece of feces I'm out.
  • Tao: Bye. I was here for a good time, not a long time. But I'll come back to visit as a freeloader every once in awhile.
  • Luhan: You better miss me when I'm gone. But only a little bit. Not too much or I'll come for you, punk.

anonymous asked:

Seeing all the hate on game grumps makes me so sad. Like?? I understand they sometimes make not so great jokes but jokes are different than actual actions, and sure they CAN get out of hand but try their best. And they are such?? A genuinly good people. You are lying of you say you never make "socially unacceptable" jokes with friends, and thats all they do. They are giant man babies with recording equipment.

Well, what’s kind of crazy is none of this shit came up on tumblr when it all actually happened. Like, none of these people gave a shit when it all happened nor do they give a shit about what the grumps said in response to these things. 

Like Dan’s accused transphobia. He said shit, but he also apologized profusely and said he was trying to be better and learn. There have been other instances where they have apologized, but these people spreading shit just see the one thing and not the other parts. 

None of this stuff rose up on tumblr until Dream Daddy came up because people were looking for reasons not to trust it and now that the game is actually out (and tbh it seems fine to me so far?) people are still going ape-shit about the grumps and tying it to the game. 

No one has to like the grumps and people (like the last person I was reblogging) aren’t going to believe you anyway if you try to explain to them what has happened, what kind of stuff was said, and what has happened since then. 

And right now in the last, what, like two or three months at least not a single thing has happened? All the episodes that have come out are fine and dandy and nothing racist / transphobic / homophobic has happened, but people are still up in arms. 

I don’t really know what to tell you, anon. If you want to enjoy the grumps then do it and watch it. I’m more than aware of things they’ve said and done, I’ve talked about it on here, I’ve seen what they’ve said in reaction to it. It’s all you can do. People are still going to flip out and bash them or say stuff, it’s just going to happen.