that's what we life to see!

the harry potter books rated by Harry's Sass™
  • the sorcerer's stone: dudley asking harry if he wants to practice sticking his head down the toilet and harry replying "no thanks, the poor toilet's never had anything as horrible as your head down it - it might be sick" like ooo!!! sick burn!!! good for an 11 year old but overall still in the developmental stage. 6/10
  • the chamber of secrets: dudley (once again lmao get rekt) telling harry "i know what day it is" and harry replying "well done, so you've finally learned the days of the week." lockhart trying to be all Amazing Teacher™ and shit and telling harry "just do what i did, harry!" and harry saying "what, drop my wand?" overall good but not with as much of an Oomph™ factor as the sorcerer's stone. 5/10
  • the prisoner of azkaban: ah yes!!! Harry's Sass™ in its adolescent years!!!! no longer a toddler, now solidly about 11 years old. draco making fun of harry for fainting at the quidditch game bc of the dementors and saying "shame [the broom] doesn't come with a parachute - in case you get too near a dementor." and harry replying "pity you can't attach an extra arm to yours, malfoy. then it could catch the snitch for you." 8/10 purely because he fucking MURDERED whiny bitch ass baby malfoy ha ha take that
  • the goblet of fire: a good amount of sass!! a healthy amount of sass! perhaps a bit held back though (come on harry get it together). rita skeeter annoying harry and asking for a word and jk rowling LITERALLY writing "'yeah, you can have a word,' said harry savagely. 'good-bye'" like FUCK he is canon savage in this book!!!! DAMN!!!!! and then he reks malfoy AGAIN "you know that expression [your mother's got], like she's got dung under her nose? has she always looked like that, or was it just because you were with her?" MOTHERFUCK GO OFF 9/10
  • the order of the phoenix: HOLY GRAIL OF HARRY'S SASS™. THE MOTHERLOAD. GOD DAMN. when vernon asks him why he's listening to the news again and harry replies w/ "well, it changes every day, you see." when hermione's warning him about picking fights w/ malfoy bc malfoy will make life hard for him and harry's like "wow, i wonder what it'd be like to have a difficult life" like fuck harry!!! tell us how u really feel!!!! literally ANY TIME he talks to an adult he doesn't like. sassing dudley left & right, putting him in his place w/ "this is night, diddykins. that's what we call it when it goes all dark like this" like fuck harry brought out the big guns w/ "diddykins". overall wonderful, truly. a good healthy teenage dose of sass. 100/10
  • the half blood prince: SHIT DO I EVEN NEED TO SAY ANYTHING EXCEPT "THERE'S NO NEED TO CALL ME SIR, PROFESSOR" LIKE FUCK. BEST PART OF THE WHOLE BOOK. OF THE WHOLE SERIES. FUCKING OWNED SNAPE HE'S FUCKIN REKT LYING ON THE FLOOR CRYING DRINKING SOME CHEAP ASS DISGUSTING ASS FIREWHISKEY. BREAKS THE GOD DAMN MOTHERFUCKING SCALE SO FAR OFF THE SCALE IT'S ON MARS. INFINITY/10. FUCK.
  • the deathly hallows: "it's time you learned some respect!" "it's time you earned it" sassing the minister of magic hooooooo boy. not much else bc harry's too busy like saving the world and shit. so extra points for multitasking and being an overall well rounded sass-er. 8/10
Harry's interview on Quotidien
  • I: Can you hear me?
  • H: Yes
  • I: Welcome to Paris!
  • H: Thank you
  • I: How are you? Can you answer in French?
  • H: Good! A little bit. A tiny bit. Très bien et toi ?(very good and you?)
  • I: Very good, thank you. We start our interviews with “can you give us your five favourites words in English or French. Or a French sentence”. Someone told me you knew a French sentence.
  • H: Comment vous faites un café si délicieux? (How do you make such a delicious coffee?)
  • I: OK, that’s good.
  • H: That’s all I have.
  • I: Do you say it very often?
  • H: No... Yes
  • I: What does France mean to you? Is it something, someone etc...?
  • H: Best people I’ve known... I think her, *shows a fan* I guess. Fabien Barthez.
  • I: Yes, Fabien Barthez. Harry, you’re 23 years old and you’re one of the best known pop-star in the world. Everybody has expectations with your new album and single Sign Of The Times. Why did you choose that song? This is not what people were expecting.
  • H: I think I wanted to.. I've always liked music that made me feel something. You know I think writing it I could feet something I wanted to bring it out. I think it's a good indicator for me of what the album is to me. That's why I wanted to go with that first.
  • I: Billboard wrote that the single was "one of the more ambitious opening statements in pop this decade". Not bad, isn't it?
  • H: Thanks!
  • I: Do you have friends working at Billboard?
  • H: I don't know anyone at Billboard.
  • I: When we listen to the song we think of David Bowie, Queen, who else did you think of?
  • H: I mean, I think everyone, anything, any song you've ever listened to growing up or throughout your life or you've enjoyed, inspired you. There are a lot of different things. I wanted to just write and see what came out. I didn't know what I sounded like to make an album. So this process was as interesting for me as I think it will be for people listening to the album for the first time.
  • I: Do you know French singers other than Serge Gainsbourg? That's a tricky question.
  • H: I know Woodkid. He directed my music video.
  • I: Why him?
  • H: I think his videos are amazing, he's a really talented guy and I love French people so I worked with him.
  • I: When you're in Spain, do you say that you love Spanish people?
  • H: No!
  • I: It seems like everything has been easy...
  • H: Great tie.
  • I: You think so? It's French.
  • H: It's not a Spanish tie, isn't it?
  • I: Can I see your loafer? Oh yes! What is the brand? That's not French, isn't it? It's Italian.
  • H: No.
  • I: That's from the European Union!
  • H: Probably yeah.
  • I: It seems like everything has been easy for you, is it true?
  • H: Was what simple?
  • I: Your life, everybody wants a life like yours, with One Direction...
  • H: I mean, I feel very lucky to be able to make music, I feel very lucky to be able to make this, I feel very lucky today being in France and performing my song. I love this song. I can't complain.
  • I: What were the unpleasant things?
  • H: *thinking*
  • I: I don't know, say only one thing.
  • H: I think when you care so much about something, it's hard to get to the point where you feel like it's finished and it feels like you're adding and it never ends and it adds up. So I think the hardest part was getting into that point and be like "ok that's finished."
  • I: You said to the Rolling Stone magazine that most of the album was inspired by a woman. Really?
  • H: No I think, honestly, the album is much more about me than it is about anyone else. I think if I said the album is about a woman it kind of feels like, I don't know, I put a lot of work into this. I don't feel like it revolves around woman. It's a lot about me and things I've never said before. It's more about me.
  • I: How did you start with a boy band and end with a solo career? Is it complicated?
  • H: It's been a lot of fun. You know we were very lucky to get to do some amazing things and at the moment in our lives, we're in a time where everyone is trying their own thing and have a good time. It's been amazing to see everyone doing their own thing as well. If I can do as well as the others, it'd be amazing.
  • I: Do you call them everyday or text them? Do you use What's app?
  • H: I don't have that.
  • I: Why?
  • H: Yes we talk, absolutely. And everyone is bringing stuff out. It's been a lot going on. It's been a good time.
  • I: This is the album cover! Can you describe it? Why did you choose this picture?
  • H: Yeah. So, I don't know. I worked with photographer Harley Weir, I'm a massive fan of her work. And that's amazing and I was lucky enough to work with her. I felt like this was what I wanted.
  • I: Why is it pink? Why the water? Why your back? Why? It's beautiful but why is it pink?
  • H: I don't know, man!
  • I: Really? You don't know?
  • H: I don't know. I don't think I want...
  • I: Apparently pink is Rock'n'roll's colour.
  • H: Apparently so. I don't know. I think it means something to me and if it means anything to anyone else, I wouldn't want to take away from that by explaining it. I think the cool thing about stuff like photos and art is you can just leave it. You don't have to explain it.
  • I: Everybody sees what they want to see.
  • H: Yes exactly.
  • I: Have you seen this?
  • *video of people reacting to Harry's single*
  • I: Your fans record themselves while listening to the song for the first time. You can hear relevant analysis and apparently they all really liked it. Do you read what people say about you on social media? On Youtube, Twitter, Instagram? Do you use Instagram?
  • H: Yes I use it a little bit.
  • *The public disagrees with Harry*
  • H: Yes I use it a little bit. I mean I wish everyone was having as good time as the girl who was like that with her hands. That's what I do when I listen to the song.
  • I: Are you the one using your Instagram? Do you use your own fingers or someone else does it for you?
  • H: Yes, I do mine.
  • I: Do you still vote in Redditch?
  • H: In?
  • I: Redditch!
  • H: That's where I was born?
  • I: Yes.
  • H: I don't live in Redditch.
  • I: So you don't vote there. Where did you vote?
  • H: London, yeah.
  • I: What do you think of the Brexit? Welcome to Europe!
  • H: Thank you very much, thanks. I mean, I don't really comment on politics. To me, anything that brings people together is better than things that pull people apart. That's ... yeah.
  • I: Yet, you are in favour of equality of rights, men, women, gay people, straight people... That's politics.
  • H: I don't know. It doesn't feel like politics. I think stuff like equality feels much more fundamental. I feel like everyone is equal. That doesn't feel like politics to me.
  • I: Your fans are fetishists. They know all of your tattoos, piece of jewellery, they have heart attacks when you cut your hair. Right now you're playing with their feelings. Do you know that?
  • H: Oh ok.
  • I: Yes! What is your favourite tattoo?
  • H: I think... I have a.. probably. I don't know, actually.
  • I: Which one is the latest?
  • H: The latest is this one there. *shows Arlo* And this one. *shows Jackson*
  • I: Jackson? All of them?
  • H: Yes.
  • I: What's the story behind your haircut? How much did you spend on hair products with One Direction?
  • H: Yeah, like a lot. I used a lot, yeah.
  • I: You're in Dunkirk, Christopher Nolan's new movie.
  • H: Yes.
  • I: How did you do?
  • H: I auditioned.
  • I: Look at you there.
  • H: I am, that's me.
  • I: Yes.
  • H: I auditioned and it was great. It's going to be a really cool movie.
  • I: Harry, it feels like we know you since you're a baby. The whole world discovered you in 2010 on X Factor.
  • *video of Harry's X Factor audition*
  • I: You auditioned alone but Simon Cowell had an idea... he put you in a band with Zayn, Louis, Liam and Niall. You became One Direction. You found the name One Direction and you sold millions of albums. One Direction are soon considered as the new Beattles and you filled the biggest stadiums. The whole world was talking about you. When you go out we prayed for your eardrums. You became UK's pride. David Cameron is in one of your music videos, your sang for the Queen. But in 2015... bang! Zayn left the band, fans couldn't get over it. But don't worry, their favourite is now on the cover of the Rolling Stone magazine, he's in Christopher Nolan's new movie, he's Mick Jagger on SNL... What you don't know is that we've met in 2012. You were in France to promote an album and now I have questions. First one! When you're in a car and fans are all around you, do you see that?
  • *video of fans around a car*
  • H: I think I've actually lost my shoe there. When I got in the car... I got in the car and I was like "how many shoes do I have?" Yes I lost my shoe.
  • I: I have another question! Do you still do that before going on stage?
  • *video of Harry and Lou*
  • I: Can we do it?
  • H: No.
  • *does it anyway*
  • I: What is the weirdest question someone asked you?
  • H: I think it was actually a French interview. I got asked if I would pee in a sink... Yeah.
  • I: Ok, that's weird!
  • H: It was the first question, the first question.
  • I: It puts you in the mood.
  • H: Yeah.
  • I: What is the question you never want to be asked ever again? Did I asked you that question?
  • *Harry asks the public*
  • H: Which one? Oh crush.
  • I: What?
  • H: Crush.
  • I: Oh ok. I didn't ask it! Did you know that a French author wrote a novel about you. It's called "Styles", it's about his obsession with you. It's in French. You can translate it.
  • H: Oh! Is that true?
  • I: Yes it's true. He dedicated to you. It's called "Styles" and it's a really good book. Read it!
  • H: Thank you.
  • I: Thank you very much Harry Styles for coming tonight. His first eponymous album comes out on the 12th May. Thank you Harry Styles.
  • H: Thank you.
  • I: Have a safe journey home.
Angsty OTP Prompts:
  • "Sorry I ruined your life. Maybe you shouldn't have married me."
  • "If I would've known he was going to die, you think I would've done it?"
  • "It's nothing against you...I just have to leave."
  • "I know you love me, but I'm sick of lying when I say it back."
  • "That's the problem. I love you so much, I'd be willing to die for you."
  • "I'm sorry I made you into who you are today."
  • "People change, and people grow. And I think we just grew apart."
  • "When I look at you, I see my world and that scares the sh*t out of me."
  • "I don't think I can spend another night in the same bed as the man/woman who ruined my life"
  • "I always told her to quit second guessing herself...and she never listened"
  • "I'd rather die than live in a world like this."
  • "Tell me what they did to you, please."
  • "Sorry just isn't going to work this time."
  • "Her parents always hated me, I guess they were right."
  • "The one you love most isn't always the one you spend your life with...and that sucks."
  • "I'll go home, but it's not home unless you're there..."
  • Dean in "The French Mistake": Here you've got a pretty good life. Back home the hits been coming since you were six months old. You gotta admit, being a bazillionaire, married to Ruby, the whole package it's no contest.
  • Sam in "The French Mistake": We just don't mean the same thing here. I mean we're not even brothers here, man.
  • Sam in "Regarding Dean": Just, you know the things we've done, we've had this weight for- forever. Seeing it gone, you looked happy.
  • Dean in "Regarding Dean": Look was it nice to drop our baggage? Yeah, maybe. Hell, probably. But it wasn't just the crap that got lost, I mean it was everything. It was us. It was what we do, all of it. So if that's what being happy looks like? I think I'll pass.

anonymous asked:

Jimin wrote in fancafe saying he felt awkward because getting the award feels surreal. It's obvious he was nervous about the whole situation and that's why he looked so tense during the show. this explains why Yoongi wanted to be next to him all the time even when they were leaving you can see how he wants to walk next to jimin twitter(.)com/mochimin/status/866501240812732416

this video saved my life?? and i saw what he wrote 💔 it was clearly not an easy time for him and the fact that yoongi didn’t leave his side the entire night is rly telling of how important they are to each other,,, i know we know this already but its always so nice to see,, i hope they’re celebrating they deserve it

3

My dear Corvo, what a sad hand fate has dealt you. The beloved Empress dead and everyone thinks you’re the killer. But we know what really happened, don’t we? You don’t want to end you life to the sound of idiots cheering as your head hits the muck, do you? Let’s see if we can do better. And to make things interesting, my mark. Consider it a gift.

Svt Teaser Quotes

“Even though you are being alone, remember we are on your side and don’t be afraid of all the fears you have”

Vernon: “One less than a full revolution” to Woozi 

Woozi: “All of the questions in the world can be answered in one definitive answer” to Scoups 

Scoups: “I was afaid and anxious since i was all alone” to Jeonghan

Jeonghan: “Somebody said it means imperfection and danger” to Hoshi

Hoshi: “The line for reaching to the beloved ones” to Jun

Jun: “As the door opened, I was faced with the new destiny” to The8

The8: “Do you remember how long did we share for each other?” to DK

DK: “In the place thirteen pieces can be completed” to Seungkwan

Seungkwan: “A pioneer who cast himself into his destiny” to Dino

Dino: “Do not be blinded by the illusion in front of you but follow the truth inside of it” to Joshua

Joshua: “An everlasting being whichever way it goes” to Mingyu

Mingyu: “Another chapter of my life began since I met you” to Wonwoo

Wonwoo: “Us in the different system, another form of seventeen” back to vernon

End of Scoups: “nevertheless we met on thirteen different paths and eventually a complete bond has formed leading us to our brightest moment"

anonymous asked:

Hello! I'm new to this app and I'm totally in love with the concept of your account! That being said, I need a lot of help when it comes to my novel/book/story whatever you'd like to call it. I'm wanting to write a typical teenager rom/com (because that's what I know best) but I can't for the life of me think of a plot or any character personalities. Any help getting me started would be MUCH appreciated! Thank you!

Okay, let’s think teenage rom-com. 

The first thing I would do if you’re stuck for ideas is to seek inspiration. Read and watch some of your favorite rom-coms, or some new ones, and see if anything lights a little flame. It could be a character, a plot piece, a trope- anything that gets your mind going. We write best when we’re writing something inspired, that came from the heart. It gives you a good place to start and then you can add characters, plot, etc and build your story from there.

I found some lists for movies on sites like imdb and contemporary YA novels on goodreads.

Another idea is to look at the commonalities in this genre. You can find lists at tv tropes.

Okay, let’s try to find some plots for you. 

1. Something I noticed when looking at the movie list is that several of the movies seem to be based off of other things, like Shakespeare’s plays, but re-told in a modern way. I think that’s a pretty cool idea.

2. Another way to get inspiration from pieces in your genre is to look for the commonalities and tropes, and then change them. You might be able to think of some common tropes in your genre that have always kind of bugged you. Here’s your change to address them in a better way.

3. You can also put a new and refreshing twist on an old trope. For example, the old love triangle trope. There are a million ways to do it in a way that is unexpected and fresh.

36 Plots Ideas

7 Tips for Writing Original Plots

7 Universal Plots

50 Creative YA Prompts

5 Overly Used Tropes and What to Write Instead

And now to try and figure out some character ideas. 

First, it’s the same deal as it was with the plot. Search for inspiration, subvert tropes, etc.  For example, inverting the “mean popular girl” trope. Maybe the girl who puts a lot of work into her appearance, has a lot of friends, and seems vapid is actually really sweet and smart in your work. That’s a more enjoyable and not so old and tired.

Also, try to keep in mind your characters’ traits. Here are my posts about starting your characters. (x)(x)

And now some more resources.

Character Generator 

100 Free Fictional Character Ideas

Archetypal Characters

The 12 Most Common Archetypes

A couple of things to note: 

1. When I say to look at previous works to find inspiration, I do mean find inspiration, not stealing, but I’m sure you smarties all know that ;)

2. Using tropes is fine, but I highly encourage creativity! Twist things around, be original! 

3. Because the genre was so vast and the question so general, I didn’t write prompts, but I hope this can put you in the direction of finding your own story. I’m more than happy to help with prompts once you’ve got some ideas going. :) I hope this helps invoke some ideas!

~Penemue

today may not be a good time to post this and im sorry for blowing up ur notifs but what the fuck !!!! i hit 1.1k followers !!!! i usually do my follow forever posts at end of the year but i didn’t do this last year bc i was waiting to hit 1k ! now here i am !

i made this blog on april 21, 2014 and had my first post in may 1st of the same year then abandoned this blog and officially came back after a year and now this blog has been running since july 2015 lmao it took me 2 yrs to get 1k rip me

anyways! my experience here on tumblr is Awesome so far! (i am not being sarcastic) (or am i?) and i met great people thru here and have made a lot of amazing friends and lost quite a few, sadly

of course @ everyone thank you thank you thank you thank you all for making my tumblr experience great! i still don’t even understand why y'all still follow my lame ass trash of a blog but i couldn’t ask for more lol i love y'all for still keeping up

NOW all i wanted to do right now at this very fucking moment is to give my mutuals a Huge Shoutout for being so so fucking lovely and so so fucking awesome and so so fucking nice! (even tho i only every occasionally talked to some of you and wish i had the guts to talk to everyone), my sappy ff starts below! :)

Keep reading

Signs as things said in my band class
  • Aries: if I could be a musician I wouldn't, but that's just because it's a fantasy. I would do it in real life.
  • Taurus: every time we stop playing music an instrument dies
  • Gemini: I was thinking so hard I forgot how to count
  • Cancer: you don't know music like I know music because I am music
  • Leo: haha, you thought I could play but in reality it's just my corpse doing all the work
  • Virgo: see I know what I'm doing but I don't in anyway know how to transfer my reading into noise
  • Libra: I wish I could be a perfect musician but I'm just a high school student who can't play an instrument
  • Scorpio: do you dare me to eat a piece of the reed? No I'll do it anyway, I'm hungry.
  • Sagittarius: you wish you were cool but nothing will be cooler than me and my sax
  • Capricorn: I just want to curl up under a chair, if you need me I'll be playing sad trombone tunes under here
  • Aquarius: you just have to feel the music, like get into it *hits head on a drum*
  • Pisces: sometimes I wish I could sleep in this class and feel the music
Respect.

If you havent watched Marks latest video, then I urge you to. Because its important. Its probably the most important video I have seen Mark do in a long, long time. Its by far the most passionate I have seen him in a long, long time.

Its so easy for people to jump on a band wagon and start to call people out because of choices they have made. On the internet your even covered by anonymity which makes it infinitely easier. 

Whats so disheartening is that if you read through a YouTubers comments, most of them will be calling them out on something, rumours, or attention seeking. They aren’t supportive or constructive. People live to tear one and other down because its easier. 

If there is one thing I can try and do, is take responsibility. And to some it may seem ridiculous. But, I have to. I feel its an obligation. Compared to Mark and others, I have but a flash in the pan but I still have nearly 15,000 who see my posts on their dash. Thats 15,000 people who can listen and take action. 

As Mark said, I couldnt give a fuck where you come from, what you believe in, what your skin colour is, your gender or your sexuality. All I care is that you’re a good person. That is who we should be. That should be the minimum we strive for in our lives. To be good people. To show others respect. 

I promise that I will do that. Not just for the lifespan of this blog, but for the rest of my life. 

Thank you Mark for taking the time to make that video. I hope people watch and take heart from it.

Oosh out
Thank you for existing

At the Battle of Hogwarts:
  • Harry: If you're not ready to go home, can I get a "Hell, no!?"
  • Students: Hell no!
  • Harry: 'Cause we're gonna go all night 'til we see the sunlight, alright.
  • Voldemort: That's fine. Then you all will die.
  • Ron: So la da di da di
  • Voldemort: What?
  • Hermione: We like to party
  • Voldemort: I don't understand.
  • Arthur: Dancing with Molly
  • Voldemort: What are you doing?
  • Ginny: Doing whatever we want.
  • Neville: This is our house.
  • Luna: This is our rules.
  • Voldemort: Please stop singing.
  • Fred: And we can't stop.
  • George: And we won't stop.
  • McGonagall: Can't you see it's we who own the night?
  • Percy: Can't you see it's we who 'bout that life?
  • Voldemort: Why is this happening to me?
  • Seamus: And we can't stop.
  • Dean: And we won't stop.
  • Hagrid: We run things, things don't run we.
  • Voldemort:
  • Voldemort: I will surrender if you all shut up.

jordanflin97  asked:

What do you think of Chloe without blue hair? I feel like it suited her more than the brown colour but that's my opinion

I like to think that they are two different Chloes. 

Young and more innocent Chloe fits with blonde hair. Look at this face:

Originally posted by arc-hero

I’m in love.

However, after Rachel disappears we can see that Chloe has suffered a lot, and it’s not only her hair but her face is darker, more pissed off I’d said.

Originally posted by pricexfield

She’s so done in Life is Strange while in Before the Storm she still has hope.

I think that’s the big difference between LiS and BtS:

In BtS, Chloe is sad. In LiS, Chloe is angry

Whatever, I can’t wait to see the evolution between the young Chloe and grown Chloe. It will be great.

im sorry i can never be dependent/consumed with my partner

when you see me in a relationship i am independent my partner will be independent. they will have their own life and their own friends and i will have my own life and my own friends. I dont see myself living with a partner, u can come over whenever but i dont like people in my space like that. I will be a boss in my career and so will you. no drama we bestfriends and we good but we dont need to be all over eachother 24/7

Thats how i think and thats what i want i dont do that dependent youre my whole world shit. that is not me at all

Minecraft 249 - Mo'Chievements: FUPA
  • Gavin: Jeremy? Can you give me some luck?
  • Jeremy: Sure! Here's your luck, pal
  • Jeremy: *kissy noise*
  • Gavin: Oh. I really didn't expect that! That's like the first pretend gay thing you've ever done to me
  • Jeremy: That's true. Probably in my life
  • Geoff: What happened?
  • Gavin: He kissed me! Now we're gonna be written about on tumblr!
  • Ryan: Do you think you're not now?
  • Gavin: Me and Jeremy?
  • Jeremy: I can guarantee we fucked on tumblr
  • Gavin: And I bet I'm receiving too
  • Ryan: I can guarantee that that's gone both ways!
  • Michael: He can guarantee because he's written one
  • Geoff: I can definitely see you, Gavin, taking it from Jeremy. I bet Jeremy would be hard and fast

@kidgecko

MOST of homestucks cast got left with incomplete or unresolved character arcs, with the exception of the striders (since theyre hussies self-inserts and hes always played very obvious favorites with them). jade and jane get it the worst though.

jades ultimate conversation with davepeta, and janes ultimate conversation with nannasprite, are parallels with each other. (they also both sort of have similarities with calliopes conversation w her god tier self, but this post is not about calliope) namely, theyre not the focal points of these conversations. none of their problems really get addressed, and they serve to characterize the other character, not jade/jane. jade and jane are passive parties in the resolutions of their own arcs (as much as these conversations can be called resolutions).

janes conversation is about nannasprite - its about nannas regrets, her fears, her unfulfilled potential, her dissatisfaction with her role, and how she wants to see jane live up to her potential. jades conversation is about davepeta - its about their newfound sense of reality, how davesprite and nepeta struggled independently and how they realized themselves through fusing, how the Ultimate Self explains everything and dont worry jade, youll feel better as soon as you Get It, i mean your puny linear human non-sprite non-heart-or-time-player brain probably wont be able to process it but youll be cool as soon as you unlock the secrets to existence i promise.

both of these problems imply an upcoming conclusion to jane/jades arcs and how they will resolve their problems… and then the narrative doesnt follow through.T

first off, the issues that these characters actually need resolved. jane, as i mentioned in another post, fears change. she lets herself be subservient to others because she is afraid of changing the status quo. this is the root of her skepticism - she doesnt want to re-examine her worldview because shes afraid of what she will learn by doing so. and this is the critical character flaw that manifested in her beta timeline counterpart as well: nanna was so afraid of the uncertainty that lies in taking a risk and running away from home with jake that she would rather face the certainty of abuse that awaits her if she stays at home. nanna never lives up to her full potential because she keeps her head down and does what shes told, living a quiet and entirely uneventful life. even after her death and resurrection, as nannasprite says, shes only there to support johns role as a hero. janes subservience obviously reaches its peak with crockertier - the internal conflict keeping her from speaking up and reaching out becomes an external conflict, and shes brainwashed, literally forced into compliance.

jade is similar - a constant repression of her personal issues in order to maintain her role as the beta kids cheerleader. the difference is that jades suppression isnt out of fear of change, but out of fear/loathing of herself. jade is miserable. she lives alone in the middle of nowhere with her inscrutable god-dog and a bunch of eerily preserved corpses - one of which is HER OWN! jade knows she is going to die! for all her visions of sburb and her friends respective paths to happiness that skaia grants her in her dreams, in the waking world shes got the vision of her own end staring her right in the face. and she never tells her friends about any of it - in her first pesterlog with dave he says “say hi to your grand dad for me” which implies that she hasnt even told her friends her guardian is dead. and then all this suppression and obfuscation blows up in jades face when she creates jadesprite, and shes the angriest we ever see her get when shes forced to confront a version of herself who cant bury all those negative feelings. when she goes god tier and fuses with jadesprite she seems healthy and neurotypical, for a while, but, like jane, when the condesce brainwashes her we see all these unaddressed resentful feelings towards dave (wrt her failed relationship with davesprite) come to the surface - even though after the breakup she reassured john over and over again that it was fine, she wasnt mad at him, dont worry about it.

jane buries her own wants and needs because shes afraid of how it will change the world and relationships around her, jade buries her own negative feelings because shes afraid of what they say about herself.

and through act 7 and the credits, these character flaws go ENTIRELY unaddressed.

janes role in collide, the climax of homestuck, is the same as it ever was, the same as nannasprites always was - to play healer, support others, and sacrifice any chance for time in the limelight. jades role in collide is to (attempt to) peacefully resolve the conflict between jack and pm - always chipper, always positive, always selfless. the prospit girls arent allowed to be selfish and are reduced to passive, supporting characters even when the narrative beats us over the head to tell us thats what would be good for them.

you could argue that janes issues are resolved in the credits and post-canon. she owns her own business, shes somebody important, shes making a name for herself and doing exactly what she always wanted to do. great! i love that thats where her arc ended! but we didnt see any actual personal problem-solving to get to that point. all of janes issues get resolved off-screen.

jade doesnt even get the deus ex machina “oh shes fine now” resolution. in the post-retcon timeline, shes miserable because shes been alone for three years and her conversation with calliope left her with the impression that her fate is exactly what her life was like before sburb - to live on her own, alone and isolated. and just like before, shes ready to take it on the chin, as is her solemn duty. davepeta reassures her, hey, dont worry, theres a version of yourself that spent those three years among friends, you just havent found her yet. but… jade never finds her ultimate self. sure she lives with dave and karkat and terezi (or near them - someone pointed out to me theres a house next to dave and karkats with green awnings, so theyre likely neighbors, not housemates), and she seems to be pretty happy, but shes still playing the role of the self-sacrificing cheerleader. if davepeta died or remains stranded in the furthest ring, that leaves the prospit twins as the only single folks in their friend group, and john is dealing that with debilitating depression. it doesnt look good for jade! even if terezi eventually comes back with davepeta (and vriska) in tow, its not going to feel satisfying because jade didnt do any work towards that reunion herself! we dont see her developing any kind of outlet for her negative emotions! hell, she never REALLY gets to make amends with davesprite, does she, because the version of her that dated him is dead, and the one who gets to talk to davepeta is an entirely different jade!

both of the prospit twins get pretty unhappy endings. but homestuck KNOWS that johns is unhappy. homestuck wants you to know that john is depressed. throughout the credits jade is just… smiley and chipper and eager to help. shes back to assuming the same shallow, forced persona she had before the game. not only do her issues fail to resolve, she actually goes backwards. its fucked.

AND LET JADE TALK TO HER GRANDPA

if zootopia had a gag reel
  • Flash: ...9...
  • Judy: THD03.
  • Flash: ...T...
  • Judy: HD03.
  • Flash: ...H... *his gadget crashes* ...this...is...the...third...time...this...happened...
  • Judy: *groans* I need more coffee for this scene...
  • -----
  • Gideon: Baa, baa, whaddya gonna do, cry?
  • Judy: Hey! You heard-- *her police cap slips completely over her head and she trips and falls over*
  • Gideon: ...Y'all, we'd better help her out before she actually does cry.
  • ----
  • *shortly after Mr. Manchas started going feral*
  • Judy: ...Mr. Manchas...?
  • *they open the door, finding that his tail was caught between his floorboards and he was desperately trying to get it out*
  • Mr. Manchas: ...It happened again, I know!
  • Nick: ...I don't know what I expected.
  • ------
  • Nick: ...Carrots. You saved my life.
  • Judy: Well, that's what we do at ZPD--EEEEEYAGH--
  • *they start falling, but the vines had been long enough that they were cocooned and still hit the ground with a loud thud*
  • Bogo: *rushes towards them* That--wasn't part of your act, right?
  • Nick: *visibly dazed* I'm seeing quick brown foxes jumping over rabbits...
  • -----
  • Nick: *starts petting Bellwether's head* So fluffy-- *accidentally rips off a huge chunk of her wool*
  • Bellwether: ...Still typing here. Totally not noticing you just did that.
  • ----
  • Bogo: ...You're fired.
  • Judy: What? Why?
  • Bogo: Insubordination!
  • Judy: *holds back laughter* S-sorry--I just can't--the word "insubordination" is just too funny--
  • Bogo: *looks at the camera* This is the fifteenth take. I cannot work like this--I'll be in my trailer--
  • ------
  • Judy: No, I am a cop. And I'm on the Emmitt Otterton case, and my evidence puts him in your car. So intimidate me all you want, I'm going to-- *sneezes at Mr. Big*
  • Mr. Big: ...It's all right. Many an animal gets the sniffles here.
  • -----
  • Judy: ...I don't deserve to wear this badge.
  • Bogo: Hopps.
  • Bellwether: Judy-- *forgets her lines*
  • Bogo: Bellwether.
  • Judy: Bogo.
  • Bellwether: Judy.
  • Nick: *offscreen* Nick!
  • -----
  • Nick: Look, you gave her a--a clown vest and joke mobile and two--two--two uh, what--yeah, no, sorry, I think I'm the one who needs that clown vest and joke mobile. *pokes his own nose* Honk honk.
  • ------
  • *Judy's train into Zootopia breaks down multiple times in the middle of its journey.*
  • Judy: *as the train breaks down in the middle of the polar region* Well, at least I can always stop by for some ice cream.
  • Judy: *as the train breaks down in the middle of the desert region* At least I can sunbathe here.
  • Judy: *as the train breaks down in the middle of the rainforest area* Wait, we're filming Mr. Manchas' part already?
  • ------
  • Clawhauser: *sipping loudly on his soda while Judy looks at the case file*
  • Judy: *is trying to hold back laughter*
  • Clawhauser: *unexpectedly burps really loudly* S-sorry, I didn't mean to do that--
  • Judy: *falls off her chair, laughing*
  • -------
  • Bucky: Hey buddy, turn down the depressing music!
  • Judy: *turns off her alarm clock*
  • Pronk: Leave the meter man alone! Didn't you hear the conversation? She feels like a failure!
  • Bucky: Oh, shut up!
  • Pronk: You shut up!
  • Bucky: You shut up!
  • Pronk: You shut up!
  • *they suddenly belt out Black Eyed Peas*
  • Bucky and Pronk: Shut up, just shut up, shut up--shut it up, just shut up, shut up--
  • Judy: *looks at the camera* Tomorrow's another day. Cut!
  • -----
  • Finnick: *from underneath the stroller* She hustled you-- *realizes his voice is actually high and pitchy* Wait--what--Nick, what did you do--
  • Nick: A little helium in your trailer, friend. Besides, you gotta be real convincing as a baby, don't you?
  • -------
  • Bogo: Two days to find the otter. Or you quit. That was the deal. Badge.
  • Judy: *is snickering*
  • Bogo: What now?
  • Judy: I-I'm sorry--I thought you said "baa". Like, baa baa Bogo, have you any wool? *falls in laughter*
  • Bogo: ...Excuse me while I actually facepalm here for a bit.
  • ------
  • Nick: All right, get in here. *steps back a bit as Judy goes in for the hug*
  • Judy: *lunges in for the hug and finds nothing, then falls on her face*
  • Nick: Sorry, just had t'get that out. *picks her up and actually hugs her* See, this is why we work so well. She knows my jokester side too well and just goes with it.
  • Judy: *muffled chuckling* ...I'm gonna fill your trailer with helium later, I swear.
  • -----
  • *while on the cable car*
  • Judy: ...Thank you.
  • Nick: *humming* What can I say, except "you're welcome?"
  • Judy: *chuckles* Should've never showed you that movie before filming. You've been humming it for days now.
  • -----
  • Judy: What are you gonna do? Kill me?
  • Bellwether: *chuckles* Of course not. He is. *pulls out a water pistol and splashes Nick's face* Wha--
  • Nick: *falls over, laughing* S-sorry, it was too easy--switching your gun to a water pistol--
  • Bellwether: *looks at the camera* Cue to Nick not being able to find where he hid the actual thing.
  • -----
  • Scientist: Mayor Lionheart, please. We're doing everything that we can.
  • Mayor Lionheart: Really? 'Cause I have a dozen and a half animals here who've gone off the rails--ails--ah, *stutters* Sorry, sorry, going too fast-- *chuckles* Wasn't quite my tempo back there...
  • ------
  • Bogo: *playing with the Gazelle app on his phone*
  • Clawhauser: *bursts into the room* Chief Bogo!
  • Bogo: *freaks out, throwing his phone out the window*
  • Clawhauser: ...You got another phone, right? And you still have my number on it?
  • -----
  • *Nick and the rest of the cast are backstage, taking a selfie with Gazelle and her tigers*
  • Nick: All right everyone, say, "sequel"!
IMAGINE THIS
  • (Raph and Leo are camping)
  • Raph: Leo, look up at the sky and tell me what you see.
  • Leo: Okay...? Well I can see thousands of stars.
  • Raph: Uh huh, and what do you think that means?
  • Leo: I guess it means that, since there's so many stars, some of them must have planets. So maybe, just maybe, one of those planets is like earth. And alien life isn't as far away and impossible as we think.
  • Raph: No.
  • Leo: No?
  • Raph: No Leo, that's not what it means.
  • Leo: Oh... Then what does it mean?
  • Raph: Well let me tell you. It means MIKEY STOLE OUR MOTHERF***ING TENT!