that's what the inside joke is

  • *in a cab; on the way to the christening*
  • Molly: *happily* Oh isn't this exciting? I bet she looks lovely. And John and Mary are wonderful parents...
  • Sherlock: *on his phone* Mmm.
  • Molly: *sighs* Oh, her name is just beautiful *giggles* I always wanted to name my daughter Persephone.
  • Sherlock: *glances at her*
  • Molly: *rolls her eyes* Hey, I was eleven at the time and really into all that mythology stuff.
  • Sherlock: *still typing* There are worse names for a child than Persephone Holmes.
  • Molly: ...
  • Molly: *raises an eyebrow* Why would it be Holmes?
  • Sherlock: *shrugs* I always assumed you'd take your husband's name.
  • Molly: *scoffs* Yeah, well, I'm not going to marry Mycroft!
  • Sherlock: *confused* We've been sleeping together and you think-
  • Molly: *giggles* No, I mean, I just thought you weren't the marrying kind.
  • Sherlock: *sighs* Sex, Molly. I don't do that with just anyone.
  • Molly: *raises an eyebrow* You love me?
  • Sherlock: Obviously.
  • Molly: *smirks* I'm sorry? I didn't catch that.
  • Sherlock: *smiles* I love you.
  • Molly: *takes his hand* I love you too.
  • Sherlock: *coughs* So you'll...marry me, then?
  • Molly: *kisses his cheek* Of course I will.
in a world where you have your true love tattooed on one wrist and your sworn enemy on the other, and you dont know which is which...

-k so her wrists are obviously kai and levana
-and when she was little she thought Kai was some terrible person she would loathe bc true love could mean romantic love or platonic love or familial love and Aunt Levana would never hurt her!!! Right???
-So she would follow around Levana, trying to spend as much time with her as possible, bc she knew her and Aunt Levana would have the most incredible aunt-niece relationship ever.
-hahaha but post-almost being burned alive, Peony is obsessed with Cinder’s wrists bc Kai!!! Like the prince!!!!!!
-meanwhile Pearl and Adri scornfully remind her that Kai is a common name, its probably some peasant
-and Cinder tries her best to stay impartial. Her gloves not only hide her cyborg hand but her tattoos as well, and she actually forgets about them for a long period of time….
-and then she meets the prince. And oh shit. Ohhhh shitttt
-cinder isnt the best at romantic interaction, and she cant tell if that was flirting?? He probably hates her, shes a cyborg…
-and the mission to figure out whats on his wrists begins
-but why is he always wearing long sleeves??
-and the night of the ball, she finally sees one of his wrists! and it says levana. Oh dear
-so all of a sudden shes in jail and kai and levana are getting married and her place is quite clear…but why is levana the other name on her wrist?
-so what keeps cinder going, all throughout scarlet and cress, is that they have to be soulmates. Theres no other way.

-hes got Cinder/Levana
-and when hes a little kid and hasnt met either, he always kinda hopes cinder is the true love because the name just sounds so much…warmer
-then the whole arranged marriage starts happening and kai’s like…idk bout this…but the wrists dont lie…
-but then he meets cinder and its just!!! marry me!!!
-and then he realizes it…one of these girls is his sworn enemy…
-shit shit shit shit shit shit shit
-but things seem to solve themselves when Cinder is arrested and becomes known as a terrorist
-except levanas definitely not his soulmate? Bc most soulmates dont want to kill you…
-and so its an internal battle because besides the wrists he knows both have glamours powerful enough to control his feelings
-some nights he lays in his bed and just kinda cries bc he doesnt know whats real anymore
-but when they kidnap kai from the wedding and theres finally some time to talk to cinder, she shows him her wrists
-and theyre like “either its u and me or we re fighting to the death over levanas affection”
-so that becomes an inside joke of theirs, and kais always like “hahaha im winning” leading up to his marriage w levana
-but they act like in love idiots throughout winter bc they now theyre soulmates

Thats kaider for yall, imma do the other ships on other posts to avoid longness

How do you describe your parents?
  • Himawari: Papa and Mama are the best! Papa is a-
  • Boruto: *interrupts* BAKA! Who needs a stupid old man when you have a beautiful strong mama!
  • Hinata: Boruto! That's not nice to say about your father.
  • Naruto: Don't worry Hinata! It's fine..
  • Boruto: I hope the Ramen shop gets shut down.
  • Naruto: Take it back child!
  • _______________________________
  • Sarada: Mama is always there for me and whenever I'm ill, she lays beside me. Whereas, papa will protect no matter what!
  • Sakura: Aw that's nice to say.
  • Sasuke: I will protect here no matter what! Even from that little pikachu banana shaped head brat!
  • Sarada: That's not nice to say about Boruto... I mean....
  • Sasuke: Oh no...he has got into you. Don't worry, my child, I will erase those feelings and let you become free.
  • Sarada: Papa?!!! No, I don't have any feelings for Boruto.
  • Sasuke: Not even one bit?
  • Sarada: I....
  • Sasuke: *activates sharingan* I'm coming for you Uzumaki brat!
  • Sakura: Darling...calm down
  • _______________________________
  • Mitsuki: My papa......let's just say that I have a parent.
  • Orochimaru: *smiles* Im his parent.
  • Mitsuki: My parent has trained me and taken care of me and feeded me and...I'm not sure if I should my parent my mama or my's confusing...
  • Orochimaru: I'm just an amazing parent. *flicks his hair*
  • _______________________________
  • Shikadai: My dad is an hardworking man and he is always here for dinner.
  • Boruto: *interrupts*
  • Shikadai: Buzz off Boruto....
  • Boruto: *fades away*
  • Shikadai: anyways, my mother is......erm...
  • Temari: *gives a scary look to Shikadai*
  • Shikadai: is an amazing woman. I love her to bits. She is so strong with her wind fan. I love my mama...
  • Temari: Hmph *smiles*
  • Shikadai: What a drag.....
  • Temari: You just thought 'What a drag' didn't you, Shikadai?
  • Shikadai: you.....know?
  • Temari: No dinner for you!
  • Shikadai: *cries inside*
  • ___________________________
  • Inojin: My mother is so beautiful and that's how I got these looks
  • Ino: Aw my cute child.
  • Inojin: Papa is so happy to see me all the time. We go shopping and training together.
  • Sai: That's right!
  • Inojin: ...and he always tells me his jokes about mama!
  • Ino: Jokes?! What kind of jokes?
  • Sai: ....
  • Inojin: *whispers to Ino*
  • Ino: *blushes* SAIIIIIIII!!!!!
  • Sai: I should run....
  • ___________________________
  • Chocho: Mama shows me how I am strong and beautiful in every way. My mama tells me that I'm not fat. It's just my curves and I love her home made food. Papa and me always get along. We go to restaurants and eat, we go to parks and eat. We even go to shopping eat. And buy most things from the shop! Even his card got declined!
  • Karui: Are you serious?
  • Choji: Hehe....
  • Chocho: I love them both!
  • ____________________________
  • Kiba's child: Mama is so nice to me. She will always be there to kiss me to sleep and wake me up in the morning. She makes nice breakfast and a warm hug. Me and mama are always studying and training together and my grades are doing very well and my strength
  • Tamaki: I'm glad you like it, my kitten.
  • Kiba's child: Papa is so fun! We go to the park and he lets me ride on Akamaru and we jump from cliff to cliff!
  • Tamaki: Wait, what?!
  • Kiba's child: There was even a time when me, Boruto and papa jumped from the Hokage's faces and we landed on soft bouncy mattress.
  • Tamaki: WHAT?! KIBA?!!!!
  • Kiba: ...gotta go *sprints away*
  • ________________________
  • Metal Lee: Papa and I are always training because we both do it for youth and mama makes me warm and happy. Even when I get nervous!
  • Lee: That's my boy!
  • Metal's Lee mother: My little cute dragon.

When I’m in a group and someone says an inside joke that I don’t understand but everyone else laughs at it and I just wanna seem like I belong

why you bring the types on your vacation
  • ESFP: you're not bringing them. why would you think you're bringing the ESFP with you? THEY are bringing YOU, and they will drag you along kicking and screaming to make the absolute most of the adventure.
  • ISFP: they will make sure you get the Real Experience of wherever it is you're going. the fabulous travel photos are just a nice bonus
  • INFP: they've been talking about going to this place for months and you felt bad about not giving them the opportunity
  • ENFP: literally everything was their idea. technically they forgot all about it, so it looks like it was your idea, but you know who the real mastermind is
  • ENTP: they have the excitement of a five year old and the random cultural trivia of a literal encyclopedia. why would you not bring them. you may need to remind yourself of this frequently when their myriad of ideas starts to threaten your budget, but still
  • INTP: somehow they know everything about this kind of trip?? when did they have time or reason to figure all of that out??? either way, you'd better not risk leaving them behind. they'll either get you out of some very weird scenarios or just provide you with unique 2 AM conversation
  • ISTP: they're down for anything as long as your idea isn't colossally stupid, and they'll help you recognize all the logical plan Bs when things go wrong. they just have all the apparent chill that you do not
  • ESTP: for the same reason there's always a normal person on Doctor Who. every adventure needs an audience conduit to remind you not to take any of it for granted and convince you to do the crazy things you can only do right here and right now
  • ESTJ: your bed is comfortable and someone has to get you out of it in the morning. come on, you said you had all these plans, are you actually planning on doing them or what
  • ISTJ: who do you think is going to remember your flight number? the time zone? that bar you wanted to check out? you??? lol yeah right. I mean you COULD just take good notes but the ISTJ will probably have better sarcastic commentary than your phone
  • ISFJ: because not only are they just a ray of sunshine, but also because you know that six months from now, you'll get a meme in your inbox that's a reference to a completely random inside joke from the trip, and this will probably continue indefinitely
  • ESFJ: they come armed with conversation starters, ice breaker games, photo scavenger hunts, week long challenges, and probably a significant list of sights to see both on the road and at your destination. it just makes sense to befriend the embodiment of the pinterest board you didn't know you needed
  • ENFJ: cross cultural communication - they will make it impossible not to at least try and understand the place where you're going, even if it's just across town. there will probably be many times you'll be glad they were there to save you from saying something stupid to a local
  • INFJ: for the free therapy, what did you expect this to say? you won't actually know how you're doing until you're sitting in the car with them ranting about things you just discovered you need to rant about. it's the best way to ensure that the trip actually does you some good
  • INTJ: they'll get you to see all your experiences from a completely unexpected perspective, and hopefully inspire you to do your research. at least, you can bet THEY are hoping you do more research next time. oh my gosh are they the only one around here that came prepared
  • ENTJ: they will tell fabulously exaggerated stories of your adventure after the fact. they just get more dramatic with every retelling and it's great. also I sure hope you didn't want to plan the entire trip cause guess what, you don't have to anymore
A list of why Larry Stylinson is the most fucked up ship ever

1. Those two went to the same concert a couple of years ago and DIDNT GET TO KNOW EACH OTHER
2. Auditioned for the same show and then met IN A BATHROOM???? WITH OOPS! AND HI?????
3. Louis asked Harry for an autograph and a pic because he knew he was going places (LIKE?)
4. The judges put them in the same band and HARRY FUCKING JUMPED TO LOUIS ARMS
5. They spent plenty of time together messing around during the whole show.
6. Didn’t win but kept the band and those fuckers would flirt anywhere in anytime.




  • The Cars fandom: chill, nice, relaxed, doesn't take itself super seriously. Tight knit and close, make fun edits and cute and creative humanizations and art im general. Post about how they like the movie and their favorite character. No ship wars, no real hate from inside the fandom(only from outside it...), no drama, no incest/pedophilia ships. Make jokes about the movie and can observe it critically. Overall a cool, friendly, and welcoming community with great content and a fun atmosphere. Just a bunch of people having harmless fun talking about something they care about and that means a lot to them.
  • Some of y'all: WHAT.... THE FUCK THERE'S A CARS FANDOM??? WHAT HELL?????? THEY'RE C A R S!!1! !! THAT'S A CHILDREN'S MOVIE FOR CHILDREN (CHILDREN!!) AND YOU UNIRONICALLY ENJOY IT????? W O W what a shitty and awful world we live in. People enjoying things?? Could you even imagine??? What a joke #hahaimakefunofpeopleforfun
The Five Times Derek Morgan Asked to Kiss You, and The One Time You Said Yes | Derek Morgan x Reader

Fandom: Criminal Minds

Pairing: Derek Morgan x Reader

Requested: Yep!

             52: “Can I have a kiss, please?”

Requests: OPEN

Summary: There were five times that Derek Morgan asked to kiss you before you finally said yes, this is the record of each of those instances.

Words: 2627

 A/N: Thank you so much for your request! This is my longest fic by like 1000 words so thats super exciting! Requests and feedback would be greatly appreciated! I have a link to my masterlist on my home page! 

             The first time Derek Morgan that asked for a kiss was when you were still new to the BAU. You had been there for a little over a quarter of a year and you absolutely loved it, you loved your team and you loved putting bad guys away, even though you did admit it took an emotional toll to see the things you saw every day. One of the main things you didn’t love was the paperwork, and since you were so new you hadn’t gotten down a rhythm yet, not to mention is was easy to pass off some extra paperwork onto the new person. What this meant was that while everyone else was done with their paperwork you were still staying in the office long after everyone else some nights. This one was of those nights. You were sipping on what you thought was your 7th cup of coffee, turning a page when you were startled by a voice ringing out in the semi-dark bullpen.

             “Hey, Y/L/N, what are you still doing here?” Derek Morgan asked, putting his hands up after you jumped, “Woah, didn’t mean to startle you, my apologies.”

             You grin at him, telling him it was alright before frowning, “I thought you went home a bit ago?”

             “I did, made it all the way down to the parking garage before I realized I forgot something. You still working on paperwork?” Coming to lean on your desk, he noticed how much paperwork you still had to get done and scoffed.

             “You know it, the newbie got stuck with all of it,” You laugh dryly as you lean back in your chair and stretch.

             “Alright, alright, you’ll be here all night at this rate, I’ll take half.” Morgan said as he grabbed half of the files sitting on the side of your desk and you thank him and smile warmly in response before he continued, “Could I get a kiss for my troubles?” Giving you a flirty grin that would make anyone’s knees weak and, to be honest, anyone’s panties hit the floor.

             You didn’t allow yourself to turn red, you knew he was the office flirt and you couldn’t let yourself get affected by it, much less let him see you turn red in embarrassment so you sent him a teasing glare. “In your dreams, Morgan.”

             Your fellow FBI agent just laughed as he went to go sit down at his desk to start on the paperwork. The rest of the night was full of idle chit chat, laughs, and plenty of papercuts.

             The second time Derek Morgan asked to kiss you was a few months later while working on a grueling case. During those few months, you and him had gotten closer, frequently going out together, having each other over for meals or to watch movies, grabbing coffee before work, just small things that seemed to start to bridge the gap of coworkers to good friends, so you were happy when Hotch partnered you up for the case, going to the ME’s office first.

             You had been in Washington State for almost three weeks now trying to catch this killer, with no leads but bodies piling up, everyone felt helpless. Because of this, Hotch sent you and Morgan to the old crime scenes, hoping that new sets of eyes on the scene may give a different perspective that could lead to a break. The two of you ran thought what happened, bouncing ideas off each other and mid-sentence Morgan stops, a look of realization washing over his face. Quickly pulling out his phone, he called Garcia, feeding her new points of information and conferenced the rest of the team into the call. Garcia yelled a name and address into the phone, and all units were to gear up and head over there.

             You sped through the streets, sirens blaring, half of the team going to the work and half going to the home. You and Morgan arrived at the house just as Prentiss and Rossi did, SWAT not far behind. After quickly putting on your vests you burst into the house, finding the unsub in the basement with a gun to the last victims head. Specializing in negotiation, you talked down the unsub, getting him in cuffs and putting the victim in an ambulance to the hospital.

             “Great job, Morgan.” You said as you two got back in the car to go clean up at the police station, “You’re the one who figured out the break in the case.”

             “Oh thank you, Y/L/N, it was a group effort,” He smiled appreciatively at you before the smile changed to one you knew far too well at this point, “Do I get a congratulatory kiss?”

             “In your dreams, Derek.” You said with a laugh, smacking his arm lightly before turning your attention back to the road.

             Sometimes, you had to admit, men annoyed the crap outta you, and right now was one of those times. You were at a bar with the team, and you were the one who drew the short straw and had to go get another round of drinks for everyone and bring them back to the table. You were leaning on the bar, glancing around the room and people watching when you felt a hand touch your arm to grab your attention. You frowned, turning to face him, this was supposed to be team bonding night, not have some creepy dude at the bar hit on you.

             “I couldn’t help but notice you across the bar, I was wondering if I could buy you a drink.” The man said, with you think is an attempt at a flirty smile. It was odd and forced, nothing like the Derek’s handsome and sultry smile. Wait. What. You stopped yourself from continuing, scolding yourself for thinking about your co-worker and close friend in that way.

             “I’m actually here with people, so I’m going to be getting back to them once I get our drinks.” You say shortly, shifting your body language to a more closed off position and hoping that it would ward of the man’s unwanted advances,

             “C’mon, sweetheart, It’s just one drink, then you can get back to your friends.” He attempts again, reaching out to touch your arm.

             “I said no.” You brush his arm away, giving him a disgusted look.

             “Listen here you little bit-“

             “Excuse me, is there a problem here?” A familiar deep voice says from behind you and you feel an arm drape over your shoulders and pull you close.

             “Are you her boyfriend?” The creep asks in a harsh tone, a sneer on his lips.

             “Actually, yeah, I am, and I suggest you back up because I do believe she told you no multiple times.” Derek says evenly, danger in his tone.

             Just then the bartender sets all of the drinks you ordered in front of you, and you see that as a sign to take your leave, “Hey, babe, will you help me carry these back to our table?” You ask as, looking up at Morgan with a smile, Mr. Can’t-take-no-for-an-answer eyeing you two with disgust.

             “Of course, darlin’, anything for you.” Derek said with a grin as he removed his arm from around your shoulders and went to grab half the drinks. You frowned slightly to yourself as you realized that you missed it. As you two walked back to the table his voice drew you back from your thoughts. “Since I’m your boyfriend now does that mean I get a kiss?”

             Scoffing, you looked up at him, finding that flirty smirk dancing on his lips and you swore you felt your knees weaken slightly but you didn’t pay it much mind, rolling your eyes for emphasis, “In your dreams, babe, I do believe I said nothing about you being my boyfriend, you said that to the creep. You know what pisses me off? He’d listen to another guy but not me. I swear, the way our society treats women, it’s just breading unsubs.”

             “Yeah no kidding,” he says with a shake of his head as you two sit back down to continue your team night out.

             Progressively, the time you spent with Derek outside work increased. Movie nights turned into accidental sleep overs when you’d both fall asleep on the couch, your head resting on his shoulder and his head resting on yours, curled up next to each other on your couch. The way you behaved around each other at work changed as well. When all of you were standing in a PD conference room around a bulletin board while going over facts in a case, you’d rest your arm on his shoulder, leaning into him slightly. On the plane on the way back when you leaned forward with your head in your hands and sighed in exhaustion, you’d feel his hand running up and down your back briefly, before you’d both return back to what you were doing previously. On paperwork days when you swore entire team probably went through one Folgers tub of coffee a day, you two developed a little routine. Whenever one of you needed to refill your cup, you’d grab the other’s on the way over to the coffee pot, and on the way back, the other would instinctively raise their hand up in response and a mug would be pressed to their palm and they’d continue working as if the exchange was second nature. 

             The team began noticing, they were the Behavioral Analysis Unit after all. When he asked what time you were coming over that night during lunch Emily shot a questioning look to Penelope, who just shrugged in response. When you made an inside joke in front of Rossi and Reid, Spencer frowned, glancing at Rossi, who in return just put his hands up and walked away. Derek and you weren’t oblivious to their questioning glances and whispered gossip though, but you two didn’t care in the slightest, you had nothing to hide nor nothing to explain, you were just close friends. Or at leasts thats what you told yourselves.

             The fourth time Derek Morgan asked for a kiss was Valentine’s Day. You hadn’t seen anyone romantically for a while by then, and surprisingly, neither had Derek. When asked about his most recent conquests he’d just shrug and say he was taking a break for a while, much to everyone’s astonishment.

             Penelope came into the bullpen on the 14th, dressed in all red and pink, handing you each cards and chocolate and asking what plans you had for the special romantic night. JJ and Will were going out, but it seemed everyone else was single with no plans besides wallowing in self-pity, so Garcia suggested you all go out together, do something fun, maybe pick out one night stands at a bar to share your sorrows with. Everyone agreed that that sounded fun and you contemplated going, but ultimately decided that you’d rather spend your sad lonely night with your copy of The Princess Bride and a tub of Ben and Jerry’s. You didn’t exactly feel up to getting drunk and watch as your team picked up hotties, especially not Morgan. The thought of him leaving a bar that night with a gorgeous woman under his arm made you feel like there was a heavy stone in your stomach, and you couldn’t exactly discern why.  

             “Oh, c’mon Y/N/N, it’ll be fun, another team night out,” Derek said, leaning back in his chair and putting his hands behind his head. Wow, you thought to yourself, that position really showed off how gorgeous those muscly arms were. “And if you can’t find any handsome man you want to take home we could always spend some time together and you can give me that kiss you owe me.”

             “Owe you?” You ask, scoffing as you open up a drawer in your desk, “Since when do I owe you a kiss?”

             “Since I did half your paperwork and saved your ass from that creep at the bar!” He laughed, the rest of the team chucking as they watched the ordeal.

             “Oh you want a kiss Derek?” You grinned as you found what you were looking for in your drawer, a bag of Hershey’s Kisses. Since he had made such a big deal over the past months of asking for a kiss from you, you thought of something funny to do the next time he asked. You swore you’d had the chocolate sitting in your desk drawer for weeks. “I’ll give you more than just one even.” Throwing the bag at him, he grinned as he caught it, shaking his head.

             “Touché, Y/N, touché.”

The fifth and final time Derek Morgan asked for a kiss was right after the team had caught the unsub. Just like a previous time, you had split up to go to his work and home, and after you, Prentiss, and Reid busted into the unsubs work, it became apparent he was either on the run or at the home. You all listened with baited breath as you waited for any sign that the team had apprehended the suspect and were safe. This unsub was a bad one, well they were all bad, but this one had nothing to lose and was determined to take down as many people with him as he could. So, when you hear gunshots and “Agent Morgan’s down, we need a medic,” Over your earcoms, your stomach dropped to your feet and you swore time stopped for a moment. Prentiss and Reid were calling your name for you to hop in the car to speed to the closest hospital but you couldn’t seem to move your feet. Then it was like time finally caught up to you and kicked you into overdrive. You swore you never drove so fast in your life.

You met Hotch and Rossi at the hospital and they assured you all that not only had they rescued the final victim in time, but that Morgan was okay, he just hot hit in the shoulder and would make a speedy recovery, and that he was in the hospital room eager to see everyone. As everyone gathered in the hospital room for a bit before having to go clear the rest of the stuff up at the police station, you hung in the back, watching from a far as you processed the realization that hit you in the car.

“Y/L/N,” Hotch’s voice pulled you from your thoughts and you turned to face him, eyebrows raised in question. “The rest of the team is heading back to the police station for last minute paperwork stuff, do you mind staying here and driving Morgan to the airport after he’s cleared?”

“No I don’t mind at all,” You said a bit numbly, nodding in response. As everyone else cleared out you finally made your way over to Derek.

“Hey, what’s going on in that pretty little head of yours?” He asked, brows furrowed as he sat on the edge of the bed. His shoulder was wrapped up, and that was all that you could look at.

“I was worried, you had me worried.” You said quietly, moving closer to him.

“I’m fine, I promise, come here,” He said, lifting his non-injured arm for you to tuck yourself underneath it. As you sat down beside him you leaned into his side, resting your head on his shoulder.

“Hey, Derek…” you start, your voice barely above a whisper.

“I know, Y/N, I love you too.” He said, moving to tilt your head up to look at him.

You nod in response, looking up at him. You two sit there for a few moments, just staring in each other’s eyes and only breaking eye contact to glance down at each others lips every few seconds. Soon that flirty grin you knew all too well spread across his face.

Can I have a kiss, please?”

“Yes,” You breathes out and without a second’s hestitation you closed the distance between your lips.

Sometimes you can’t help but feel like your entire world is dark. You lose your purpose and everyday you’d wake up feeling like there was a lack of motivation, or something in your life. You lose feelings that you think will never come back, and you disappear in your own world. Sleep was an escape, and sometimes it was a reminder of what you were running from. Waking up gasping for air, or screaming because some memories still haven’t gone away. There is a pain deep inside of you that no one really notices because hiding the way that you feel is easier than trying to explain it. As soon as someone finds out, they give sympathy and thats the last thing that you even want. There is no way you can show someone, there is no escaping from your own mind. Smiling and cracking the occasional joke got you through the day most of the time. Everyone was so easy to fool. Wake up from the 4 hours of sleep that you got (if you were lucky), roll over to start another long day, eat if you felt up to it, do the things that everyone expects from you, then sleep some more because that is all you can get yourself to do. Every day drags on and on and you hope that maybe one day something bad will happen to you, an accident. Because you don’t want to play the selfish card and put your family through a suicide that would shatter them. But maybe, just maybe an accident would happen, and you would no longer have to exist on this earth, and no one can say that you were selfish. 

This is exactly what its like on a daily basis to live with depression. This is what its like to wake up and feel lost. And if you’re lucky, someday you can pull yourself out of it for a while until it decides to attack you again. 

  • What she says: I'm fine
  • What she means: How can Liv and Ravi NOT end up together? Okay, get this. We've seen Liv fall in love with Lowell only to question their relationship because there was no foundation. They weren't friends. If Liv wasn't a zombie they wouldn't be together. And Major. They're friends, but he can't accept her being a zombie. Can't accept that she changes with each brain, but she's still herself. HOWEVER, Ravi has single handedly been there for Liv through it all. He is her best friend. They have the inside jokes, the teasing, the loyalty. And you know what else Ravi does? Understands. He's made it clear that Liv is Liv, not the current brain she happens to be using. He's even tried cheering up Major by saying "She just needs to eat another brain." Okay? He's cool with it. Without him, Liv is nothing. Nothing. And who has dedicated himself to finding a cure for zombie-ism? that's right. Ravi has. He's tried so hard. And willing to keep trying. For Liv. It's all for Liv. And I can't even believe for a second that this show might reduce these two to nothing more than a quirky friendship I swear to god. Just fukc me uP

Theresa ‘strong and stable’ May: “People talk about the sort of Brexit that there is going to be - is it hard, soft, is it grey, white - actually, we want a red white and blue Brexit. That is the right Brexit for the United Kingdom.” 

John Oliver and every rational person left on Earth: “But what does that mean? You’re heading into a negotiation that will set the course for Britain for generations, and you’re naming colours on the fucking flag? Forget running through fields of wheat - that must be the most ridiculous thing you’ve ever said. And actually, you know what - I apologize to that guy from before - I said there was literally no worse way to discuss this than with cheese, but I was not counting on Thatcher in the Rye here answering a policy question with a fucking colour scheme.”

anonymous asked:

Why has there been a sudden increase in "protect kihyun" posts? He does need to be protected from all the bullfuckery he gets but why the sudden increase in the need to protect?

yesterday theres been some people who feel like its ok to post certain slurs and attack him on a mx vlive chat(which mx can read, mind you), that was not only an insult but racist(some rly sick humour). thats what started this. people were accusing kihyun again of stealing lines and whatnot (this is really old tbh) but personally i wouldn’t say thats all; 

i feel like a lot of their publicity portrays kihyuns surface personality very… extremely, and the fandoms been conditioned to stereotyping him as some savage, rude, mean character(although at the beginning it may have been an inside joke w affection). since there are many new mbb, its “bullfuckery” as you say has been spreading like wildfire as of late, with no filter. there are actually mbb who specifically dont like kihyun, and act on it.

tl:dr, kihyun gets shit he doesn’t deserve and someone finally pushed it too far so the topic was brought onto tumblr. its a new era so a lot of ppl are making posts about leaving derogatory comments behind (for wonho and shownu as well), and it spread, so here we are

anonymous asked:

since everyone's asking you depressing stuff for the ghost!laurens au, heres a lighter question lmao ,, do phillip and john have any inside jokes? or like if hamilton is talking about something serious like work or something and john just goes "thats what she said" and phillip juST BURSTS OUT LAUGHING and ham is like ??


John’s primary goal is to make Philip crack up at the most inappropriate times possible, he’s messed up more than a few lessons and dates, let me tell you.

Philip is a sucker for innuendos. Even when the joke doesn’t actually make sense, if it sounds the slightest bit dirty, he loses it. Alexander is the same way, so when Philip hears a really good one, he waits for the opportune moment to use it on his dad and they both end up rolling on the floor in tears while Eliza and Angelica (his sister) scold them.

anonymous asked:

Could you do an imagine all of them (aka: the basics Yoosung, Jahee, Zen, Jumin, and 707(DEFENDED OF JUSTICE)) +V reacting to mc working at a maid cafe?

hehehe this will be fun. im sorry i got to this so late.


  • he discovered a maid cafe by accident
  • sure it was an accident zen?
  • he is kinda unsure how to feel about these girls in maid outfits
  • mc saw him and knew
  • she walks up to him 
  • “what can i get you to drink master?”
  • he recognizes her voice and turns bright red
  • you could tell he was struggling to contain the beast
  • he is also glad she was his server
  • but he then realizes she does this for other men
  • he then starts coming everyday 
  • he stays for the whole time
  • mc wouldn’t mind if it werent for the fact that thats his money hes spending on her
  • he eventually gets over it 
  • does he really???


  • he attends the maid cafe to hang with some of his college friends
  • he is somewhat uncomfortable 
  • mc notices and comes over to make him feel better
  • you keep cracking inside jokes with him
  • but you still have to call them master
  • everytime you do yoosung gets red and flustered
  • later that day at home yoosung just giving her many questions 
  • is high key upset
  • she does that to other men as well
  • she even does grooming shit
  • but he doesnt stop her he just gets really possessive (???? not sure if that is the right word im bad with words until its too late lmfao)


  • she saw a sign for a maid cafe and decided to check it out 
  • was not expecting to be called mistress
  • and she wasnt expecting to be called mistress by you
  • lowkey felt great 
  • highkey made her embarrassed
  • she had a good time  but was uncomfortable with you giving similar treatment to others that you don’t know
  • she actually worked with seven to spy on mc 
  • had to tell seven many times that he cant come with in disguise
  • did he listen
  • no
  • he did not
  • mc kicked him out
  • but jaehee did not get caught
  • and after a while she came clean with mc
  • jaehee’s professional fangirl skills came in handy 
  • i mean fangirls have to spy without getting caught amiright? 


  • he was doing buisness for your particular maid cafe 
  • shit
  • if he finds out you know he will send body guards and mset specific rules for you
  • cue mc attempting to seem different
  • “mc?”
  • you tell him and hes surprisingly ok with it
  • under one condition
  • you occaisionally wear the outfit at home
  • he was kidding
  • tbh you were gonna do that already hes just always busy
  • when ever you call him master he gets all fidgety
  • you cant help but laugh


  • he knew already but pretended not to
  • one day you have to help the newbie learn the basics
  • when you get to the newbie you almost flip a table
  • you try to teach him
  • emphasis on try
  • hes constantly pushing your paitience
  • hes also extra af
  • you find joy when he makes male customers blush
  • its such a weird sight to see
  • but tons of fun
  • by the end of the day when you get home you both crash in the outfits 
  • whoops


  • he was selling photographs at your maid cafe
  • all was going well 
  • til he heard your voice
  • he thought maybe you were visiting to support him
  • but then he heard you doing what the other maids were doing
  • he suddenly was hungry
  • when you two are home he tells you he didnt know you worked at a maid cafe
  • he confesses he wishes he wasnt there for work
  • you ask him to come tomorrow 
  • does he go?
  • ofc

i hope this was what you had in mind. it was fun to write lmao.

anonymous asked:

Not a fc but Does anyone have any tips for dealing with confrontation? My manager wants to start me working on the service desk, where people go when their gas points dont load or something goes wrong during an order. Point is, that's the place that people go when they're already testy. I handle confrontation two ways: either by getting really nervous and my face goes red and I panic or can't speak, or get extremely annoyed and start getting petty and its jot good. I really wanna do a good job!

At first it’s going to be hard even with the best tactics. But with time you will become dead inside like any good retail employee. One such skill is the customer service smile while imagining the customer getting what they truly deserve. All jokes aside becoming desensitized is a very common occurrence among the customer service ranks. -Abby

50 shades of bradley

A/N: ill admit at first i didn’t know what to make of this request but i had so much fun writing this, i haven’t wrote actual smut in a while so its the first time in a long time that i just sat there and wrote the whole imagine/smut in one sitting. Hope y'all love it! 

******* also remember this is smut so it does include sexual acts******

Request by @maxinejordanstyles : Helloooo It’s me. AHAHHAHAHAHAH Anyway, thanks for replying! So here’s my plot I guess? Um maybe you and Brad decided to watch 50 shades of gray and then later Brad becomes um you know. And blah blah stuff happens. thanks you don’t have to rush yourself doing this!!! Ilysm! Ps. You writing still rocks!!! Bye for now! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️


Brad invited you over for a movie night, tonight so you gladly obliged and was at his house by 5pm. He greeted you at the door with a hug and a kiss, per usual. You sat on the couch with your typically busy boyfriend and sat with him on the couch, content with even just being with him in that moment.

“So what are we watching tonight?” You asked curiously leaning into him on the couch.

“I wasn’t sure, thought we could look through what’s new” he suggested as you went through the movies available for renting.

“Hey what about that 50 shades of gray that everyone is obsessed with, i have to admit ive been pretty curious about it” you admit slightly timid of what brads reaction would be.

“Seriously? I mean sure, if you want to”

“Yeah, let’s go for it.” You say, clicking on the movie.

As the movie started you sat close to brad with his arm around you and you both stared at the screen watching the movie. That was until the first sex scene came on and you felt brad kiss your neck.

You giggled and said “brad stopp, watch the movie” you said taking his hand that was around you in your hand.

“But baby” he whined touching your leg.

“Brad, be patient” you said teasingly kissing him quickly.

You could tell he was already sexually frustrated, but you had hardly gotten half way through the movie.

Once you were getting towards the end of the movie you decided you would have a bit of fun with him in the mood he was in. You moved your hand to the inside of his thigh inching close to his bulging hard on that he had from this extremely sexual movie.

“Babe what do you think you’re doing” he said becoming flustered.

“Oh im just having a bit of fun” you joked placing you hand directly on his hard on, whilst you began palming him.

“Baby dont tease me like this”  he whined.

“Yeah, what are you gonna do about it” you teased, knowing exactly what he was going to do.

“Thats it, you asked for it” he laughed, picking you upover his shoulders carrying you to his bed. Leaving you in giggles.

“Is this what my baby girl wanted? Hmm” he said climbing on top of you kissing you softly.

“Mmh yes please brad, i need you” you said coming off more needy than you had wanted.

“Whatever you want my princess” he said kissing down your neck to the parts of your chest that were already exposed from your shirt.

“Oh these half to go my love” he said smiling to himself removing your shirt and then your pants revealing you in your panties and bra. Brad hummed as he kissed all over your body, leaving you in shivers, then returning to your mouth.

“Mmh, bradley its your turn” you giggled peeling his shirt off his toned body and unbuckling his belt.

He took his pants off and threw them on the floor and returned right on top of you in only his boxers.

“Better? Hm?” He teased kissing your neck.

“Perfect,” you say getting into a heated makeout session with him, You pause for a moment, and slip from under him. He looks at you confused, but you only smile at him. You walked to the front and center of his room and looked directly at him whilst you touched all over your body with your bra and underwear still on.

Brad stared at you in awe, you’ve never done this but you were feeling particularly feisty tonight. You seductively remove your bra slow and teasingly, letting it hit the floor. You then turned around and slowly removed your underwear before slowly walking over to brad and getting on top of him.

“Baby that was so bloody hot” he said moving his hands to your ass and squeezing it.

“Yeah,you liked that?” You said in a cheeky tone. You then kissed your way to his v line right above his boxers looking up at him with innocent eyes.

“Fuck your so beautiful” he muttered.

You removed his boxers and tossed them on the floor revealing his hard on hitting his stomach. You licked the tip before putting his entire member in your mouth, bobbing your head up and down. You’d glace up at him every so often because you knew that drove him crazy. He had his head back muttering sounds of pleasure. He was really close but you just couldn’t wait any longer. You got up and almost put his member into yourself until brad flipped you over.

“I dont think so darling” he laughed.

He did something unexpected, he kissed you slowly down your stomach, right to your pussy.

“Fuck brad don’t do this I need you inside me right now”

“Oh ill be inside you, but not quite yet my princess” he said kissing your clit, then began lapping his tongue around your clit and inside your pussy driving you insane.

Your moans filled the room and you were reaching the brink of an orgasm, but he didnt stop.

“Brad, fuck dont stop” you moaned out.

This made him go faster and lick the shit out of your clit while working his fingers inside of you pumping in and out finally bringing you to your orgasm.

“Thats my baby girl” he smirked licking up every inch of cum on his fingers.

“Fuck brad its been so long” you panted.

“I know baby girl, you ready for the real deal” he said pumping himself before putting a condom on.

“And you were going to rush, and not put a condom on, tsk tsk young lady” he teased you.

“Mmh, ive been a bad girl teach me a lesson” you teased

He laughed at your mocking voice mimicking the movie. He started thrusting into you like it was nobody’s business.

“Fuck bradley keep going it feels so good, fuck” you said moaning loudly. He kissed your neck softly while thrusting even faster than before, just hitting your g spot.

He was on the brink of cumming and so were you, you both seemed to be in sync.

“Brad dont stop, im almost there”

“Me too baby girl me too” he said in desperation.

He brought a hand down to rub your clit finally making you cum for the second time tonight. He came in his condom, pulled out and took his condom and threw it in the trash.

“That was so amazing brad, i missed you”

“I knew you had a reason for that movie” he teased before kissing you

“Well bradley, you’re supposed to say ‘i miss you too babe’ but i guess your kiss will suffice” you laughed.

“You know i missed you, so stop that” he said kissing you again.

“Can i sleep here” you whispered while under the blankets cuddling with him.

“I kind of assumed you’d be sleeping over anyways my love” he said cutely kissing your nose.

“Okay cool because i’m definitely to lazy to get up right now.” You said causing him to laugh.

“ i love you so much, you know that?” He said brushing his hands through your hair.

“I love you too bradley, to the moon and back” you said before falling asleep on his chest.

“My princess, always” he whispered kissing your forehead as you slept.

#2 Dylan strome

Omg yay requests are open!! Can you do one with Dylan Strome? Where you two are best friends and when you two are together you’re both very funny and goofy, but then you leave, and all of the Otters chirp him for being super in love with you but never making a move? Haha thanks!

Song suggestion of the day: bull ride by magic city hippies (don’t ask its a good song ok)

Dyl pickle is my favourite nickname bc its so cute. Dont hate on my baby its not his fault he looks like that. Also he looks so cute in this interview im sorry its not my fault i dont make the rules.

Originally posted by smolsnakeking

You laughed as Dylan threw his arm around you shoulder and glanced up at him to find him smiling down at you.

“Don’t look at me like that.” you told him with a laugh.

“Oh now I can’t look at you now? Okay.” he replied with a laugh as he watched you shield the side of your face with your hands.

“No pictures, no pictures.” You snickered.

“If either one of us turned out to be a stalker its you.”

you dropped your hands and feinted hurt. “Is this because you’re mad I went through your old facebook posts?” you asked incredulously, raising an eyebrow.

“You sent them to everyone!” He complained.

“Anyone in erie wanna hang out.” you imitated, dropping your voice as low as you could.

“Oh shut up.” he rolled his eyes as you snickered. “you have to be nice to me, I let you borrow my sweatshirt.”

“You let me? You literally wouldn’t let me leave the house till i ‘put on something warmer’” you giggled.

“Same thing.” he laughed. “I felt bad that I completely annihilated you at mario kart.” he reasoned.

“You are a liar and a cheat.” you told him with a stern look as a kid raced past you. “Oh my god, look at sonic go.” you laughed, pressing yourself against Dylan as the kid almost bowled you over.

“Gotta Blast!” Dylan laughed. “Look at him go, thats fucking wild.” he commented as you watched the kid tear down the hall.

“Why he run? Where he go? come back sonic and tell us your secrets.” you lamented.

“Now we shall never know. Goodbye sonic, my sweet prince.”

You snorted at that, pushing open the door to the where the otters had decided they would have a team building cook off. Why? We may never know.

“Look who finally showed up, the dynamic duo themselves.” Alex smirked.

“Decided if we were gonna grace you with our presence, better to do it fashionably late.” You informed them.

You and Dylan were paired up with Dylans teammates Alex and Taylor. Alex was rattling off instructions and trying to keep the three of you from mucking the recipe up.

Keep reading

Distraction (Part 1)

Prompt: Your a teacher at the school for gifted youngsters and your favorite students need help sneaking out to complete a mission but Charles said it was to dangerous so he put Peter (Quicksilver) in charge of them. You on the other hand know they are ready so you get talked into distracting Peter so they can sneak out. Jean encourages you to use any method because she plans to wipe his memory.
Little did you know she completely forgets to do so and you may have a small crush on Peter.

Request for the full two parts.

“Please! I know you believe in us I can read your mind!” Jean pleaded. “I do but I don’t want to risk my job,” You replied.

“If we succeed, you’ll probably get a promotion, were not asking you to go with us just distract him!” She said.

“Who?” You asked curiously.

“Peter,” She smiled mischievously “And don’t be afraid to use any means necessary, you need to have his full undivided attention. With his speed we can’t take any chances,“ She explained.

“What do you mean my ‘any means necessary’ exactly?” You asked. She rolled her eyes in amusement.

“You know what I mean, your in your twenties
and super hot plus I know you like him, and if
anything goes wrong or you wanna say or do-things I can always erase his memory,” She said.

You couldn’t deny that did sound appealing, this was your chance to tell him exactly how you felt and maybe some other things if you know what I mean. You couldn’t deny Peter was hot and you thought about him a lot, like one time you saw him vibrate his hands you thought about what else he could vibrate.

“Fine, but you promise to erase his memory?” You asked. “Yes, trust me now go distract him,” She encouraged.

You walked into the room and Peter was leaning against the wall watching the angry teens.
“Hey (Y/N),” Peter addressed as you walked into the room.

“Hey Pete,” You said. “Listen, I need to talk to you,” You said. “Ok? But make it quick cause I need to watch them,” He said moving aside with me.

You took a deep breath and signaled Jean so they could start moving.

“Peter, I like you a lot,” You blurted out.
“You do?-” He said almost turning around. You pulled him into a hug to prevent that. "Whoa, are you okay?” He asked. The kids started opening the window which made a loud sound so you decided to say the next thing on your mind with him still in your grasp.

“I want you inside me,” You whispered.
You felt his body tense up. "Y/N) I-” He tried before you cut him off. The kids were almost out and you only had to hold him off longer. So you decided to get all your dirty thoughts out.

"Peter, I-I need you,” You whispered leaning in closely. “Think about you and your hands, fingers, tongue,” You continued.

“Think about you and what you would do to body, Peter I want you to fuck me, fuck me so hard that I’m limping the next day,” You said looking at the teens as they finished climbing out the window.

Peter swallowed at my vulgar words and licked his lips.

“Touch me everywhere, p-please,” You finished.

You heard the click and saw that they had all successfully escaped. Stepping back you kissed his cheek and ran away in utter embarrassment leaving Peter in shock.

The rest of the night you stayed in the room hoping to avoid everyone.

Peter was dismantled.

That was an understatement.

Peter Maximoff was a twenty-seven year old virgin who lived in his mothers basement up until he moved into the Charles Xavier School for Gifted Youngsters and became a teacher.

The day he met you he swore time had slowed down and not the usual way it does when he uses his power. No, it slowed down in way where he could analyze all your features individually and grow more attracted to you. He met you when Charles asked you to show him around, you were by far the most beautiful woman he had ever seen, once he found out about your mutation he couldn’t help to be more attracted if that were even possible.

You were this gorgeous, collage educated, fully developed women who taught at one of the most amazing school on the planet.

He honestly couldn’t get enough of you.

You both became fast friends and Peter had already accepted thats all that it could have been since he thought you were to good for him. But little did he know you liked him too, liked him so much your panties would drip just from watching him exist. Like when he ate his jaw would clench and you could see all the strength and power it possessed. Or when he smiled and his dimples would appear lighting up the whole room.

The worst part of it all was that Peter was unknowingly handsy. He grabbed your waist when passing by or when you sat on the couch there was never any room between you and his hand always somehow ended up on your thigh.

It was like this for months and the only person who knew how you felt was Jean. But Peter on the other hand, everyone knew how he felt about you except, well you. He would talk about what he would do to you if given the chance with the guys and all of them agreeing since they all shared a mutual attraction to you. He would spill his emotional side to the young girls to avoid reticule.

But today was a day like no other, Peter had just witnessed the girl of his dreams, the girl he had jerked off to a thousand times beg to be fucked my him.

He couldn’t even move because it felt like a dream.

He looked down to see a throbbing hard on and he groaned. He swore that was the hottest thing he had ever seen.

The next day was a new day. After a night of picturing you naked screaming underneath him he was going to take action. That was until you all got called in to the office for disobeying the rules, thats when Peter had noticed he had failed at his assigned task.

And now here is where you all were.

Getting scolded by Charles despite completing the mission effortlessly.

“Are you insane? Do you have any idea how this could have ended up?” He yelled.

You were getting yelled at for aiding the delinquents in escaping but you couldn’t focus because Peter had been eye fucking you from across the room.

You were one-hundred percent sure Jean did not erase his memory because the way he was looking at you now made your panties drip in curiosity.

“Peter! Get over here!,” Charles called him.

Peter stalked slowly and stood closely behind you, close enough so you could feel his hot breath on the back of your neck.

“What do you have to say for yourself? You were suppose to watch them! How did you manage to get distracted?” Charles asked.

Peter chuckled a little and looked up. His whole demeanor had changed and he seemed like he had gained a sudden new confidence.

“Why don’t you ask her?” He said referring to you.

“Fine then, explain,” Charles demanded.

“I told Peter a couple jokes and he got distracted,” You lied. “Bullshit, she came at me with some pretty nasty things Professor,” He said.

“Like what, Peter?” He asked. “Like how she wanted me in-"Don’t you think this is a little ridiculous?” You cut off.

“Im giving you a chance to tell me, you know I can use my power to check the whole situation,” Charles said. “Continue Peter,” He said.

“She told me she wanted me inside her, that she wanted me to fuck her so hard she couldn’t walk the next day. She said she wanted-"Thats enough,” Professor said turning red faced, he had always seen you more like a daughter he didn’t need those images.

Scott and Kurt both turned to look at you in amusement

“I rest my case then, nobody would be able to think straight after she said something like that to them,” He defended.

“Ok, I believe you based on the uncomfortable air in this room and you need to keep your thoughts to yourself this is a place of learning,” He said pointing at you.

“Jean, detention for a month everyone else three weeks plus no training for four months. As for (Y/N) and Peter I think you need to have a private adult talk in Peters room,” He said unable to look at you in the eye.

You were not about to face Peter, hell to the no.

You hurried out of there but you weren’t so lucky since Peter’s mutation was super speed.

Next thing you knew you were in his room and staring at the door to afraid to look back.