I hate myself I want to stay in bed crying all day
Not to knock your methods or anything but I’m gonna be honest here, nothing makes you feel shittier when you are feeling shitty than staying in bed and crying all day ? Perhaps in short doses it can be cathartic but over extended periods of time it WRECKS you I am telling you! (I know from
experience … one summer I stayed in bed for an entire WEEK crying and napping and wallowing in my sad feelings - and it was a futon bed that was pretty low down to the ground TOO so it was! A whole effect! And anyway after that my mother dragged me out of my room and made me go for a walk and then said I was not allowed to be in the house between 9am and 3pm and if I wanted to wallow I had to go and do it somewhere else … which sounds mean but I’m telling u it was the best thing that happened to me that smart because I got out of bed and had to go walk down to the library if I wanted to laze on the wifi, or go exploring m town and ! Exercise and fresh air might not be the CURE for self hate, but they sure as heck help to stop wallowing in self pity and often help u to stop feeling worse … it’s like, an improvement in the little things, and I think it builds up towards the bigger thing a, you know !!!)
So like ! If u want to have a cry then go for gold but would suggest that afterwards you have a hot shower and cry under the tap until ur tear ducts don’t feel so sore and then get dressed and wash ur face and brush ur hair and all the stupid little things that u usually can’t be bothered to do, and get urself looking SUPER cute and then go for a walk around the block and back !!! And then you can go back to ur bed and cry if u want, so long as u promise that u space it out as frequently as possible with more positive outlets eg colouring in and drawing !!! AND !!! Please promise that u will look in the mirror each day and pick out one little thing that u like about urself, even if it’s the most menial thing like the shape of ur ears or that random sound that ur tummy makes when ur hungry?
The one thing I have learnt is that self love starts off small and at the beginning it’s a lot of “fake it til u make it” motto to get you going, until one day u wake up and realise u actually do love yourself and the whole of urself, ur head over heels in love ! But to start with u have to pick out little things to be positive about and stick with it, even if the reason that you are deciding to like ur nose is the fact that everyone seems to hate noses and ur nose doesn’t deserve that kind of hate, and BESIDES, it’s quite a cute nose! ECT ECT! And try catch urself on negative things u say about urself, contradict them with positive things until it isn’t a habit anymore !!! I’m telling u that even if this stuff sounds fake it ISNT and I know because I am out the other end of it, and I love EVERY little bit of myself, even the darned infection on my big toe and my sore sinuses !!! And when u love urself … there is nothing happier, bud ? U gotta take little steps towards it ! (And then one day U will BE there and it will be good, I’m so sure!!!)
please be gentle with yourself. you’re trying. if it’s taking you longer than you thought to achieve something or get somewhere that’s okay. try not to compare yourself to others too much because not everyone gets to where they need to be right away. you’re alive that’s what matters. keep trying. you’ll get there.
get to know me meme; 1/10 female characters: clara oswald (doctor who) “That was you, my friend, making me scared. Making me feel like a bloody idiot. Oh, don’t you ever tell me to mind my language. Don’t you ever tell me to take the stabilisers off my bike. And don’t you dare lump me in with the rest of all the little humans that you think are so tiny and silly and predictable. You walk our Earth, Doctor, you breathe our air. You make us your friend, and that is your moon too. And you can damn well help us when we need it.”