that's mister to you

What happened in my head when I watched Jacqui and Erron's intro
  • Jacqui: I'm so happy to be with you, baby.
  • Takeda: Me too. *they both kissed and suddenly *
  • Erron: *pops out and snatches Jacqui * 🎶It's Mister-steal-yo-girl 🎶
  • Takeda: Noooo!
  • Jacqui: What the-?!

Skip to just under a minute and listen to how he pauses and says “Ah, Laterose”.

The Morning after...

 RP of Right after the apes get totally trashed and awkwardness ensues..oh boy!! 

           This wasn’t the first time Koba had gotten flat out drunk, the bonobo knew the bottle too well. The one thing he was not used to was having everybody else in the ape colony participate with him. He usually hid any crates or bottles of the “horse piss” if he came across it, especially the liquor and would just drink with his two friends. That damned freckled chimp Grey decided to be a prankster and shared out several of Koba’s hidden crates of the stuff right after the hunt. He found it funny what the alcohol did to Koba so why not the others? Granted Koba found it all rather fun at first.. But as what often would happen he would drink himself to oblivion. Usually Stone was there to back him up and act as a bouncer. Last night he had no idea what had gone on.

           Koba found himself staring up at the crude ceiling of his makeshift nest as usual. He could see the world spinning around him, his stomach turned, a typical hangover. He slowly lifted his head up and propped himself on his elbows. He looked like a sorry sight with his hair sticking out at different angles liked some wrecked troll doll, he always somehow got drool all over himself. He was the definition of shit-faced. He looked over to his left and saw a familiar dark form.

           Ah…Stone.. His groggy eyes told him. He rolled on his side and wrapped his arm around the chimp’s torso and leaned against his back. Koba felt those small tender feelings in him ebbing up, he felt like giving his partner a tickle. The giggling bonobo reached in between Stone’s legs and ran his fingers up and down. Usually Stone would jolt and grunt like some frog that made him feel better. But something was wrong here, there was nothing there..Unless that damned chimp got a real serious injury.

           Koba leaned over to take a look, he noticed right away for the first time that this chimp was much smaller than Stone and the scent was all wrong. It was a female and telling from her rear end, she was in heat. Oh…. On closer inspection he realized that this wasn’t just any female but the queen herself, Cornelia. Fuck….

           What the hell is she doing in my nest? Where the hell is Stone? Koba sat up and stared out from his nest, it was light outside but nobody was stirring, usually somebody had to force him out of bed. Usually it was Stone with an angry Rocket or Caesar beside him, waiting to question his drinking problem. It was not like any of them understood anyways…

           But why Cornelia? Koba let out a long sigh. He leaned over her and sniffed at her face, he could smell the alcohol. She probably got confused or couldn’t make it back to Caesar’s nest so decided to crash here perhaps. Koba didn’t find that an issue, he had no real sexual interest anyways in her and he respected Caesar. Their nest was way up so it was better that she came here instead of possibly getting hurt. He told all these excuses to himself.

           But why do I feel so damned bothered? He never woke up with a female next to him before. And the fact that Cornelia was in heat made him very nervous. He knew too well how jealous and protective Caesar got around her during that time.. Koba could never back himself up if the ape-king just happened to walk in here and see this sight. He scratched his crotch area and felt anxious. He had certainly done something to somebody and he stunk of estrus. Well I did just lean up against her…

           Stone rarely ever got that drunk so Koba was assured that he watched over him. He would never allow Koba to get into any trouble, he could always wake up one morning knowing he had not anything completely stupid. Stone was probably around here somewhere, he most likely went down to the river to piss and drink. Speaking of piss, Koba winced and shoved the wet straw bedding aside, he was always too lazy to get up and use the bathroom when necessary. He was damned disgusting and knew it too well.

           He didn’t want to wake Cornelia, just encase she might be shocked and probably accuse him of something. The tipsy bonobo clumsily climbed down from his nest, a terrifying feat when you are still half drunk, and made his way down to the river to freshen himself up. He was sure nobody had seen him leave the nest, he will just take his recovery elsewhere out of sight until Stone would find him…

PEAK POINTLESSNESS: That’s it. That’s literally all of the letter. 20 words.

Dicky Onions, I salute you.